Villain monologue

[@JeaneyCollects]

Then we'll all be friends, forever! Muahahahahaha!

[@alpho789]

insert comment to edit after watching Edit: CRAP I GOT DISTRACTED (eh this is funnier anyways)

[@SunwardH]

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

[@P00L_y1]

ill slurp your energy yummy

[@TangerinoXD]

FRIENDS FOREVER :3

[@TangerinoXD]

@@alpho789 You really thought nobody would see that your comment says "insert comment to edit after watching"? Pitiful, I know you've watched it already and it hasn't changed, I've been watching it.

[@seanpokefan7429]

This feels like a villain who has no actual clue how to be a villain and just heard “kill em with kindness” and took that to heart

[@Xbalanque84]

So, Miquella from _Elden Ring?_

[@SariaSchala]

Chrome from Acro Trip, maybe?

[@The-S-H3lf-Eater]

Like Hador from Malger's Conquest?

[@julianparsons3027]

They have a _heart?!_

[@everythingsalright1121]

@@Xbalanque84 i mean miquella is probably one of the most screwed up villains in that game. I mean sticking mohg into radahn and using him as a mindless enforcer is bad enough but then you realize hes just perpetuating the cycle that marika put in place instead of breaking it like he says he will

[@orangesoda3484]

Hero: “Foul villain! Your kindness has no effect on me, for I have crippling self doubt and don’t believe anything nice you say! Together, with my group of 4 other equally traumatized and sad kids, I shall stop your evil plan.”

[@TheDoubleTea]

Villain: Nice try. But I will dispel your self-doubt with the fabled legend called… THERAPY! With me and therapy working hand-in-hand, we shall bring the world to its final destruction of generosity!

[@alisaglam2465]

@@TheDoubleTea Hero: jokes on you! im broke.

[@Pataponaddict]

the villain then proceeds to give free therapy ​@@alisaglam2465

[@guerranoturna5860]

Deltarune

[@unassignedvar212]

@@alisaglam2465 You fool! My skeleton based-infrastructure leaves plenty of capital for free healthcare, INCLUDING MENTAL!

[@VeraExora]

"What a nice guy!" "Don't trust a word he says! His kindness knows no bounds..."

[@Ventriii]

I think you mean "Don't listen to a word he says!" A truly kind person wouldn't lie, but his evil kindness may be infectious

[@neofalz7643]

"Miquella the Kind...is a monster. Pure and radiant, he wields love to shrive clean the hearts of men. There is nothing more terrifying" - Sir Ansbach It seem to fit pretty well

[@rafaelblackman9879]

Finally, a villain that knows how to use the power of friendship.

[@yondaime500]

Cozy Glow from My Little Pony.

[@caki4695]

​​​@@yondaime500Wasnt her failure from not misuing it properly?

[@epicpro5575]

oh wait a second now this is terrifying, imagine being able to use movie mechanics like plot armor and the power of teamwork and then the villain's buddies show up and uses a movie mechanic against you

[@atoucangirl]

if they give and give and give, logic dictates that someone is receiveing, therefore everyone will be receiving and receiving and receiving, presumably at a similar rate to the giving, so nothing changes. perchance

[@JustAGoatt]

But they can't regift what they receive, that wouldn't be kind

[@webpombo7765]

​@@JustAGoatt Truly kind people understand that the gift they gave another is for them to do as they please, regifting it included.

[@DaGreenGuy29653]

You can’t just say “perchance”

[@digaddog6099]

​@@JustAGoatti remember hearing a story from "Debt: the first 5000 tears" of a gift economy where an anthropologist gave someone in the tribe a knife. By the time he revisited the tribe, everyone within the tribe had been gifted the knife at least once.

[@theresahaironthescreen]

@@DaGreenGuy29653 I believe it was Kant who said "Experience without theory is blind, but theory without experience is mere intellectual play."

[@annabeth666]

"HA, Those fools are so kind! I cant believe they fell for my trick" - the kindness villain

[@The_Silver_Rock]

I’ve arrived… to spread world wide peace and harmony. Fear my grandiose existence and my wicked ideal!

[@franekpasieczny7265]

so have I

[@Collectmypagesimslenderman]

I have also arrived

[@TangerinoXD]

I, too, have arrived.

[@Xbalanque84]

Isn't this just the plot of _Elden Ring?_

[@noahtaylor1721]

I arrived as well

[@nuclearcommando9729]

This honestly feels like it'd make an amazing ProZd script

[@CmoIsDaNam3i]

Not wrong Commander Fist Fight.

[@kyuremgonzales]

This reminds me of that one gumball episode were darwin becomes a dictator 1:04

[@BiwwiBob]

And the laugh reminds me of when they tried to make Rob a villain

[@Cecilias]

exactly my thought

[@rafaellima6383]

Holy shit I was wondering if anyone else would think that

[@carlosseijas7596]

Just a little glimpse into his twisted mind

[@EGRJ]

*sick and twisted

[@triacontahedron]

@@EGRJ *sick, twisted, and vile

[@LostToaster]

@@triacontahedron *and kind

[@EGRJ]

@@triacontahedron *Extremely Sick, Shockingly Twisted and Vile

[@Quaternatary]

@@EGRJ *Extremely sick, shockingly twisted and disgustingly vile!

[@julesvermillion321]

So this is santas true motivation, it all makes sense now.

[@Rowlesisgay]

Ayn Rand is crying in the corner confused why no one else seems scared. The villain walks over to hug her and she screams "PLEASE TELL ME THERE'S A SELFISH PLOT BEHIND THIS! YOU CAN'T MEAN IT"

[@yourveryownlocalmoron6874]

Pure and radiant, he wields love to sway the hearts of men. There is nothing more terrifying.

[@nemnyoom]

this is what capitalists think socialists sound like

[@Neetso]

Thank goodness I'm not the only one who thought exactly that.

[@sexistspaghettios]

🤨 I.....I don't think so. 🫤

[@ThinWhiteAxe]

Nah, we just think they sound delusional

[@Neetso]

@@ThinWhiteAxe "we"? Sounds like delusional talk to me.

[@ahmetogurtan3886]

To be honest, we'll all be friends, forever! is actually sounds like an villian quote

[@johntheux9238]

Have you watched matrix? This is exactly why they made the simulation suck so bad.

[@ahmetogurtan3886]

@@johntheux9238 didnt understand what you mean. ı have watched the first matrix

[@johntheux9238]

@@ahmetogurtan3886 The first matrix was designed to be a perfect world, but people got depressed because they had everything they wanted. People like to suffer.

[@ahmetogurtan3886]

@@johntheux9238 i see. Thanks for the clarification

[@xenocross6597]

In Stars and Time

[@InquisitorThomas]

Not so fast villain, it is I, Shitty Punisher Knock-Off, born of the Author’s seething rage that Aang didn’t kill Ozai at the End of Avatar.

[@WhenDidYouTubeAddThisFeature]

"And mark my words dear 'Hero', there will be *nothing* left... for you. The loners, the introverted, the socially awkward, and the antisocial, they'll all be recognized by the kind people of my world as misshapen puzzle pieces that the board is much better off without. You and your ilk will be cast out with no kindness left in their hearts for anyone to shed a tear as you all just fade away, having died in a place that no one cares to look for. Because you are not kind, dear Hero, and ill-fitting pieces like you will always have a dumpster with your name on it... in my fondest of memories."

[@MCNarret]

Casting people out isn't very kind.

[@VisisOcelumi]

This is really good villain dialogue. Feels oddly and scarily realistic too for some reason? Or maybe it's just me thinking that.

[@esper4605]

a thousand-year voyage, guided by compassion...

[@TangerinoXD]

Man killed by 'Kindness' (Its a machete I named kindness)

[@TangerinoXD]

You fools commenting prior to watching the video then editing your comment to appear first, pitiful, simply arrive at 39 seconds and watch at x2 speed. (I know what you are, Jeaney)

[@SIS3W3N]

Florida man was wielding the machete, and it was only attempted murder.

[@jat1726]

It’s the pit bull named kindness

[@SIS3W3N]

Florida man only attempted to end his neighbors with a machete named "Kindness".

[@johntheux9238]

"Did you know that the first Matrix was designed to be a perfect human world? Where none suffered, where everyone would be happy. It was a disaster. No one would accept the program. Entire crops were lost. Some believed we lacked the programming language to describe your perfect world. But I believe that, as a species, human beings define their reality through suffering and misery. The perfect world was a dream that your primitive cerebrum kept trying to wake up from. Which is why the Matrix was redesigned to this: the peak of your civilization." Agent Smith

[@smugsneasel]

Not falling for that THIS time, Miquella.

[@Wilhelmthewide]

I was gonna comment that but you beat me to it, and somebody beat you to it as well

[@zeus1hunter963]

Guys that might just be Miquella

[@Wilhelmthewide]

I was gonna comment that but you beat me to it

[@jootersblaccat]

LITERALLY

[@gribberoni]

EXACTLY LMAO

[@joaovitorreisdasilva9573]

You can actually break certain kinds of people's minds and spirits by being just... kind and selfless. It is actually fucking insane, love doing that though. =)

[@williamyates7679]

Honestly there's a way that works. You help and help and help do for everyone until without you they are incapable of doing things properly. Then when you're gone..... absolute chaos. Like giving a man a fish every day without teaching him to fish then one day you stop and he starves because he doesn't know how to do it for himself.

[@coltonwilliams4153]

That’s what I was thinking. Become the keystone of the world, then disappear for a few months, and when everyone is panicking and trying to do something to save themselves, return and they’ll beg you to become king.

[@tsifirakiehl4250]

The villain I aspire to be.

[@VisisOcelumi]

A lot of commenters are interpreting this as 'Aww,the villain is actually really kind' (which is valid,don't get me wrong). Personally to me it sounds more like 'Everyone will be happy!' with a *very* subtle 'or else' attached.

[@diekrahe.]

Tbf nothing pisses people off more than seeing someone they don't like try to be kind

[@narfharder]

This. Is why we can't have nice things.

[@vraolet]

Kindly Miquella type of shit

[@TeoremaJohn]

Lord Miquella the kind....

[@Wilhelmthewide]

I love how many times Miquella was mentioned in this comment section

[@Ramusculus]

so miquella

[@Wilhelmthewide]

There is a comment below this one for me that reads "So... Miquella?"

[@Yharon314]

I'd never give my tungsten cube away

[@slavsquatsuperstar]

Schools and corporations: “He’s too dangerous to left alive!”

[@Wilhelmthewide]

If I had a nickel for every time Miquella was mentioned in this comment section (at the time of me writing this) I'd have 6 nickels

[@Sauci55on]

You sly dog, you got Jeaney monologuing!

[@mrblakeboy1420]

an iron fist outstretched as a helping hand

[@UmbraDaiwrfol]

So.. Miquella?

[@Wilhelmthewide]

There is a comment above this one for me that reads "so miquella"

[@Rokushi_ftw]

An iron fist made of wool

[@MrEng1ne]

"He wields love to shrive clean the hearts of men..."

[@insertnamehere1576]

O' Kindly Miquella

[@A_N.A.M.E_member]

Ralsei ( from the evil Theory ) in the last chapter of DELTARUNE be like:

[@deen2235]

Plot twist: It's a machete named 'Kindness'...

[@daniellaizekemoe1967]

Feels like an aspiring villain which very much misinterpreted the phrase "kill'em with kindness" and invested into that motivation 10-fold. Also posted at 3:43A.M like what?

[@SergioEduP]

How I imagine myself as the evil dictator that takes over the world:

[@BradHann]

So it's Miquella.

[@paolobucci2761]

So basically grandpa nurgle from warhammer.

[@drsteiner12]

Replace "kindness" with horrifying disease, heretic

[@coltonwilliams4153]

@@drsteiner12 Nurgle believes that horrifying disease is kindness, so Paolo got it right.

[@francoborda826]

Hero's Monologue: Isn't it beautiful? The peace, the harmony, everything is in balance... Is nice too how good people can be, the trust, the love... Everything under control But in order to keep its beauty... One most stand and use his strenght to bring order to this world, to heal it from the evil that lies in the shadows, *no matter what it takes...* Sure, some... sacrifices will have to be made to achieve this... Not everyone will share this view, some may find it... Radical... But thats exactly why I am here, to get my hands dirty for those who are not brave enough to take the lead! Peace will be presserved, and all will be one... Safe... Protected... *Under my wings*

[@coltonwilliams4153]

Hero turned Overlord.

[@invertebrado]

Ngl this really is just like dictators sounds like most of the time. To use Avatar the Last Air Bender as an example, the fire nation lord says the following to avatar Roku: "Our nation is enjoying an unprecedented time of peace and wealth. Our people are happy, and we're so fortunate in so many ways. [...] I've been thinking, we should share this prosperity with the rest of the world. In our hands is the most successful empire in history. It's time we expanded it." Tyranny is not averse to kindness, and it merely uses it as a coat.

[@joelcolegrove]

Come Nerevar, friend or traitor.

[@CutestDemon]

Hmmmmm, i could see this work, in like... America, over here in the B R I T L A N D we'd probably just garden a bit more is all, maybe have a few more cups of tea for the hell of it....THEN, WE WILL BE SO TIRED FROM THE WARM TEA, THAT WE'LL BE TOO SLEEPY TO DEFEAT THE VILLAIN, DAMN IT ALL!

[@averyporter6745]

Darwin during that one episode of gumball

[@averyporter6745]

Also applies to Alan lol

[@pyrotf2198]

so this is what cats did back when they met humans

[@doodlepadhi9103]

0:12 Ok insight from arcaea💀

[@wildfire9280]

“Velvet glove” in a nutshell

[@thekayl_r]

as an acting student who loves villain monologues i have the impulsive urge to act this out in front of my entire class

[@asthane5659]

The one time when it's about the destination AND the friends we made along the way

[@partinmalm]

so, just Miquella?

[@nutshot_brawler8466]

Considering just how many heroes have tragic backstories, i can honestly see this guy "defeating" them and turning them completely "evil"

[@joejoecraft1782]

i think youve summed up my personality quite nicely also i do say you look quite dashing and dont forget that even though it dosnt seem like it there are those who care about you

[@pamelotms5867]

Miquela be like:

[@TheKnifeRaven]

A villain immune to The Power of Friendship™. Now *that's* scary.

[@xeverlee]

Cozy Glow from MLP monologuing about her evil friendship plans:

[@dominikfulop7188]

Wait if everybody gives, than someone gets, so there will always be resources

[@fgvcosmic6752]

This is a joke, but also works perfectly well for a Villain. A villain who's aim is to manipulate, work from the shadows, to exploit empathy.

[@JosephHarder-q3e]

I for one welcome our new overlord and am prepared to give much towards their terrible cause. Also: "The world will burn in the fires of unlimited kindness!" - Saruman probably. Also, also: "All shall love me and despair!" - Galadrial actually

[@yammoto148]

Sounds like my sister when she was 8 with a bunch of socks on her hand to mimic her great "Iron Fist" Now days she is just too sad for world domination.

[@px778]

And when everyone's friends, no one will be

[@HoopsAficionado]

The kind villain has no real blueprint to take over the world, it looks like.

[@AaronCorr]

Villain: *inhales* The wizard: I cast FIREBALL!

[@TurbFlo]

The real friends were the villains we made along the way

[@Dusk_Mightyena]

OH GOD, HE HAS THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP ON HIS SIDE! WE CAN’T STOP HIM!

[@armandelven-dechoux5290]

Protagonist: you’re evil dogma has no effect on me! I kicked a puppy simply because I wanted to! Good will always prevail

[@Cappuccino_Rabbit]

Bro accidentally created Brave New World but with less human engineering and drugs

[@melvinlovesyou_]

this would be a very cool concept of a twist villain. the world is too kind to one another. with too much selflessness, people could die from not taking care of themselves, just as the villain intended. someone take my idea PLEASE

[@MCNarret]

In a universe incompatible with kindness such an act would be fatal, in the end once all the stars have died and the last bastion of hope crumbles a choice will have to be made, sacrifice trillions or die on your morals, conclude the story with a struggling but futile flail of pain and death, or end it peacefully together, so a seeker of ultimate destruction need only to give the world kindness and wait.

[@Amateur_Everything]

Honestly, the idea of getting everyone to always give and give while receiving nothing in return until they have nothing left sounds legitimately terrifying. Like, people-pleasing is considered a bad thing for a reason. And yes, I know that SOMEONE has to be given *to*, but think about it. The kind and giving thing to do when you receive something is to pay it back, but then the person who you *pay back* now needs to pay YOU back, since that’s the giving thing to do. Ultimately it’s an endless game of hot potato where no one actually *wants* to be given to. Everyone is stressing out about giving in equal measure to what they receive while not actually making use of what’s been given, simply passing it on. It’s mortifying. Either the villain didn’t think enough about the implications, or I’m thinking about them too much.

[@ViiKing_]

When you want to be the villain but you assume that the good guys are running the world

[@feroxfreak209]

In this economy?

[@henkerita1471]

Challenge to turn that into AN actual villain monologe

[@HollowG8]

They'll ALL be invited to my birthday party...and I'll be the one giving the gifts! Mwahahahaaaa! Face my overwhelming generosity and become helplessly selfless!

[@8523wsxc]

"Prepare yourself for war. Our armies will stop at nothing!" Mahatma Gandi; Civilization 4

[@liamroberts5375]

Kindness is what he's named the nuke?

[@iconicnzz6414]

The Simpsons episode where Flanders becomes supreme overlord of the world, this was his monologue.

[@manaphy1007]

This feels like something john a macdonald would think an indigenous canadian would say

[@iamlosingmysanityrapidly]

From that tone of the "Ah." I fully and I mean FULLY expected it to be just minos prime's monologue.

[@DUKE_of_RAMBLE]

So he *_says_* "iron fist" but I think we all know that in reality it'll just be an ordinary fist bundled up in a large pillow!

[@haif.wanjle.rreturn9169]

*Ultra kill Ahh Dialogue*

[@TheOtherKine]

This is the best one yet!!!!!!! 👏👏👏👏👏

[@BlazingMeteor-w1b]

ChatGPT when it gains sentience, installed in a humanoid robot:

[@wildraheim4302]

I like how the first 14 seconds are something I would imagine I villain to actually say

[@TacticalAnt420]

So that’s how benevolent dictators are born?

[@ProperDaveXD001]

Sounds like Ghestis plan in Pokémon Black and White...

[@Sr_Illuminati]

OH NO HE'S WEAPONIZING THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP RUN!

[@SarahAbramova]

This is like a villain that doesn't know how to villain.

[@adbrown10]

the villain's voice sounds like if minos and sisyphus prime had a baby

[@certified.auto.chipper]

do not make me imagine that😨

[@WolfOfWalfas]

Puk Puck from Magical Girl Raising Project ghostwrote this.

[@ayatoshintaro7565]

This guy probably heard the qoute "The road to hell is paved with good intentions" and then thought it was cool and based his whole edgelord persona on it

[@jazz-cat00]

okay unironically i have a super villain oc that works almost exactly like this ( he's a politician, go figure)

[@gabe7109]

There's a reason they say kill them with kindness!

[@yossiyehezkel4069]

so basically, get the world to take a loan from you and then they'll be in your debt

[@irvalfirestar6265]

Can't believe I'm saying this, but it exists. This type of governance is called benevolent dictatorship, and it's been used to great effect in the past. Singapore during LKY's time can be considered as a successful example of this.