Rise of Skywalker: A Complete Cinematic Failure

[@vito]

This video consumed about three months of my life. I hope it was worth it! To watch the uncensored cut, head to www.patreon.com/thevitoshow.

[@erik9830]

How long is the video?

[@haikoheinz7359]

i´m sure it was - can´t wait!!

[@ballaiy2003]

I can't waiiiittttttt

[@fernandocaballero9830]

It's a rantgasm three months in the making.

[@vito]

@@erik9830 an hour long

[@IgnisRex64]

Don't forget, it's not only Luke's lightsaber Rey buries. It's Anakin's. So she buried Anakin's lightsaber on the planet he was born and raised a slave, watched his mother die, slaughtered a whole tribe of people, and in the substance he hates most: sand

[@DaMaster012]

And then she steals Luke's last name. The most memorable and influential protagonist in modern fiction had his legacy pulverized into oblivion so the most execrable exemplification of a Mary Sue since Bella Swan could take his place. I would call the Disney Corporation/Darth Kennedy "Star Wars" sequel trilogy bad fan fiction, but that would be a disservice to even bad fan fiction; those stories don't get multi-picture, multi-million dollar movie deals and get treated as canon. (Except Fifty Shades of Grey, but no sane human being likes those.) I speak no hyperbole when I say I've read My Little Pony fan fiction that was incomparably better written and more respectful to their source material than the monstrosities Darth Kennedy, Jar Jar Abrams, and Ruin Johnson shit into existence are.. TFA, TLJ, and TRoS are three movies that extol the virtues of murdering your ancestors and stealing their valor.

[@aidancarney6315]

Luke’s time on Tatooine also stunk. It represented hopelessness for him, a dead end in his life, and of course he saw the only family he ever knew get burned to a crisp. Thematically, tatooine is always perceived as basically a bad place for the characters. It’s only in TROS because the audience recognizes it; it is significant to us, but irrelevant to this story and to Rey. It’s very clear that JJ does not think too highly of the audience’s intellect.

[@lifetodamax]

@@DaMaster012 well said. Yeah with fan fiction the writer at least loves the source material. Disney loved money they could make. Johnson loved being unpredictable to a wasteful extent. Now I love hating these movies. The circle is complete.

[@lifetodamax]

@ignisrex64 heh heh...sand.

[@benarnold3565]

@@aidancarney6315 yes , and burying something in the sand in a desert, is symbolic of abolishing something forever. the movie is saying that the Jedi are all dead forever and abolished from existence. and all that remains is the descendant of pure evil (Rey). Really a truly unbelievable message to put in a mainstream family movie. awful beyond comprehension.

[@dumpmuch]

I was watching this movie on an airplane and people still walked out...

[@pittland44]

You win the internet for today. Well done.

[@Mrlolly]

Why does it say that this comment was from 27 years ago

[@justjake385]

@@Mrlolly it’s his name lmao

[@denistyy]

Enough internet for me today, I reached my goal

[@HEAVYDIAPER]

Hahahahahahhahaha

[@kununity]

Disney's fanfiction is all about Rey beating everyone: Better pilot than Poe, better sidekick than Finn, better "chosen one" than Anakin, more powerful than Palpatine, better at understanding and finding weird McGuffin artifacts than Luke... Not to mention Rey steals Luke's lightsaber, home, X-Wing, power AND FUCKING LAST NAME.

[@esecallum]

She is boring plain Jane.wooden...

[@Treblaine]

She's in her 20's on Jaku... why doesn't she already have a surname? If you don't have a surname then pick one.

[@Jops00]

Treblaine .... “solo...”

[@mrtony80]

It's a shame. There was nothing Finn was better than Rey at. She outclassed him from beginning to end. They really fucked up with how they handled Finn, among others. Finn should have been so much more badass.

[@MinuteLeech2]

Self-insert writers trying to make their OC one-up everyone else.

[@J-Hue]

The fact that the rise of Skywalker ends with the death of the Skywalker bloodline and replaces them with a Palpatine is the ultimate example of not understanding your own premise.

[@rafikicasanueva6]

And the worst part is that the title itself is called “Rise of SKYWALKER”! But it ends with a Palpatine being alive and all the Skywalker family gone

[@dogliker23]

​@@rafikicasanueva6Image if they made an entire sequel to this where they showed this movie was actually just a dream in Kylo's mind and then they redo the entire ending to this beloved trilogy. Not gonna lie, I would pay to see something like that 😂

[@rafikicasanueva6]

@@dogliker23 that would be lovely! But i honestly would’ve preferred more that in the ending Kylo/Ben Solo survived instead of Rey, because if that will ever be the case, it would actually be the RISE OF SKYWALKER!

[@Popepaladin]

So in your opinion a core message of original Star Wars is that bloodlines and family names are more important than friendships built on common goals and values?

[@J-Hue]

@Popepaladin I just think that if they're gonna name a movie "Rise if Skywalker," it should be about the rise of a Skywalker. If you make a movie called "The Rise of Stevie Wonder" and then make the movie about Stevie Nicks, I'm gonna be looking at you funny.

[@Milllmill]

It’s kinda crazy how we never got a scene with Luke, Leia, and Han

[@vito]

Yeah lol. What a disaster.

[@bradhedgehog12]

Vito That’s for sure dude

[@AlexCulver]

Disaster from Jar Jar abrams

[@brandonandujar2289]

Kathleen Kennedy literally didnt allow Luke to be in Force Awakens cause he would upstage Rey

[@bossfire2515]

Even when we never see Leia or Luke properly react to Han’s death and have Rose react to someone we don’t even know instead... yeah

[@timefallfarmer3912]

Disney had Harrison Ford, Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher and they didn't put them together on screen. Let that sink in.

[@rkitchen69]

It's a tragedy.

[@hankjones4692]

That actually didn't sink in until you brought it up.

[@samuelstephens6904]

Carrie Fisher died and Harrison Ford has a difficult relationship with Star Wars. You can't really blame the trio not being on screen together on any creative decision given the circumstances.

[@MiguelCruz-oz7km]

@@samuelstephens6904 JJ could have put them onscreen together in TFA. He already knew that Ford was one and done with that one. And yet he didn't think it was important that Luke and Han have at least one scene together.

[@samuelstephens6904]

@@MiguelCruz-oz7km -"JJ could have put them onscreen together in TFA" Nah. It's too soon. Having Luke be this mythical figure that is built-up works better, especially when TLJ challenges those ideas. Waiting for the third movie to have them all on screen together would have been better. But Harrison Ford ain't gonna stick around that long. And then Carrie Fisher died. It just wasn't meant to be. I'm okay with it though. The moments we did get with them were nice. Maybe we could have had a better send-off if George Lucas hadn't made the prequels and these movies were made a decade earlier. Such is life.

[@skeletorrobo]

Kathleen Kennedy: The main thing is to protect these characters... End result. Han stabbed, Luke vaporised and Leia griefed.

[@tanith117]

Chewie, Well he's okay but he really didn't do much, 3PO Mind wiped, R2 Actually not sure, I barely saw him in 7 and 8 and heard nothing about him doing anything in 9. So 1/3 of the cast is okay, not a passing grade.

[@gbrogo7139]

USS Prinz Eugen 3po got his mind back

[@elah1023]

Remember: the main thing for Di$ney is to protect their income.

[@kollegedenkfehler2290]

Exactly. Lie right in the face. She brought them all back JUST to make sure,. that she surely DESTROYED them all… amazing 😤

[@bucbuc472]

The main thing was the denigration of the white male characters. They succeeded in this.

[@ayejay2457]

It’s really too bad that there are only 6 starwars movies… I really wish they would’ve made more after episode 6. Real shame we will never know what becomes of Luke.

[@BiggieTrismegistus]

Yep, just like I wish they'd made more than one season of _Star Trek: Picard._

[@coltonwhite2518]

Well, there is the expanded universe before the -corporate sanctioned theft and purge- .

[@tommybell1786]

I know what you mean, but for me there's only 3.

[@clanker2821]

@@tommybell1786really? I could have sworn there was 4, there was this one really good prequel film and a tie in show.

[@franze4]

@@tommybell1786lmaoo fr how’d the empire become the empire and how’d darth sidious and darth vader get power then🤣

[@nightmonkey9748]

Anakin when he’s building C-3P0: “Alright mom, he’s almost finished. Just need to update him to prevent him from translating ancient Sith language in accordance with Republic Law”

[@mr.barcode3186]

In all fairness, I actually didn't see an issue with that plotline. The idea behind them erasing 3-P0's memory is that it would reset him to his original state (that being, when he was build by Anakin), and that the restrictions on Sith translations were added later, probably when he came into Padme's service. 3-P0 even says: "I believe the law [against translating Sith writing] was passed by the senate of the Old Republic." This makes sense to me, as I doubt the Jedi Order would want just anyone to be able to translate Sith writing.

[@VelvetMagician]

Mr. Barcode That sounds very plausible actually

[@GrizzlyTank]

Didn’t they reprogram him at the end of the prequel?

[@sammcdermott78]

GrizzlyTank they wiped his memory but they could e done that as well

[@Desyx14]

@@mr.barcode3186 Why would he speak sith in the first place though? What Translation Device would have Sith pre-loaded on it? Translators are common software across the galaxy so I'd assume they're all probably built by the same corp. Anakin built C-3PO from the scraps he scavenged on Tatooine. Idk how in the hell a sith language program would be there. Somehow it seems really not plausible whatsoever that a clone wars era scrap droid would've been pre-loaded with sith. Hell I think it's nearly amazing he can speak galactic basic fluently.

[@AlfredoPuente8]

So: -Palpatine was still alive -The New Republic was a failure that was eliminated by a Neonazi group in a few days -The Jedi Order is still gone -Han Solo die as a smuggler -Anakin didn't bring back balance to the force. -Anybody can create weapons that destroy planets nowadays. The sequel triology makes the originals feel pointless.

[@Dogedogee]

Technically, it was the First Order who had hidden in the Unknown region for 30 years. So it can legitimize a lot of things. Starkiller base which is a planet, Illum. In Jedi: Fallen Ordrer we already see some imperial facilities and everything. But I can't defend the fact that the Jedi Order is still absent despite the horizon provided by Episode 6. Han Solo's death was not necessary it's been 5 years now and I still cry but it was essential to the character development of Ben.

[@rolkflameraven1483]

@@Dogedogee Wait, what? Starkiller is freeking Illum?!? Oh, FFS what more desecrations are they going to do to the old EU?

[@Dogedogee]

@@rolkflameraven1483 Yes it is...

[@timothye.2902]

@@rolkflameraven1483 yea SKB being Illum makes it even worse because Illum is A) a place sacred to the Jedi order. And B) a place where you can obtain crystals with which to make lightsabers. Which means we are lead to believe that in the decades of time between the fall of the Empire and the activation of SKB that Luke never visited that place or had anyone else even check up on it as he attempted to re-establish the Jedi Order. It also means that no one, Jedi related or not, bothered to even take a cursory glance at a planet that was well known in the universe and on most if not all star charts, even as it experienced enough traffic needed to turn it into a weapon 4 times more powerful than the most powerful weapon ever conceived.

[@paulturbo7563]

Pretty much.

[@_.gayathrimohan._]

wow the roast of the movie is more interesting than the movie itself

[@stuff31]

Medium rare with cranberry sauce

[@WestCoastShredders]

nah go to @E;R

[@stz128]

it's the true entertainment value of Disney Star Wars

[@clank4001]

28:45 is more entertaining than the whole seq trilogy haha

[@129das]

that every roast of this movie and of the last movie, even of the movie before.

[@SuperTonyony]

What they did to Luke in the sequel trilogy is unforgivable.

[@billolsen4360]

I just figure Hamill didn't know what the production was going to turn into or he's a real bad money-manager and need to take this gig.

[@Avalon_1991]

Mark Hamill signed up when George Lucas was still in charge and had seen George Lucas's story which he really liked. He couldn't break his contract.

[@billolsen4360]

@@Avalon_1991 He could have broken it, otherwise it would amount to involuntary servitude forcing him to act, which was outlawed by the 13th amendment. See the Olivia de Havilland decision. It may have cost him to refuse to perform, but he couldn't be compelled to.

[@vizion007]

I couldn't agree more! What a tragedy! We know he struggled internally with the script i.e., "this is not Luke", and something compelled him to acquiesce to the production, I hope perhaps one day he reveals more. I suspect he hoped in something...

[@wastelandlegocheem]

When even Hamil says he hates it, you know you fucked up. Here's hoping the Clone Wars crew gets to make the next movies that retcon this entire trilogy

[@DavidThomasFilms]

Snoke might actually be my favorite character of the Sequel Trilogy since he practically represents it entirely. He starts off big and mysterious, making you wonder about the potential of where it all leads to, only to end up as nothing inside a cloning tank of Sith urine.

[@WintersWar]

while disney and the cast have to pretend it's a wonderful film. we don't. you know who lost some cred to me, ian mcdiarmid. I know i wouldn't turn down a fortune either for the role, but he did diminish the character, and before that movie, it was an awesome character, now taken down a few pegs.

[@zacmaserarti5798]

U are very accurate

[@elfabusss3287]

And, just like this trilogy, was killed for no reason but then it is said that it doesn't matter:"we have a lot more to replace him"

[@alfredvickers4054]

Whether one likes the theory or not, at least Snoke being Darth Plagueis would have had potential and tied the new trilogy to the prequels in addition to the OT, and been less likely to undermine the existing storyline from the previous trilogies. Rian Johnson was so smug and superior ("Your Snoke theory sucks!"), yet instead of doing anything interesting, he tore the character (and the franchise with him) into pieces.

[@kossend1]

One could say something similar of Luke Skywalker. He started out as the juggernaut we last saw with huge expectations of what he has become in the interim and then after building up those expectations even further, each and every one of them was subverted until we ended up with a broken, diminished husk of the character we loved, before a rushed and unconvincing apology.

[@yunhgwaff]

“The best thing about this trilogy is that it is over.” Man, that hurts your soul as a Star Wars fan when you really think about it.

[@ಇLiv]

But star wars is never over MUAHAHAHAHA

[@danielijust8776]

@@ಇLiv i enjoyed episode 1-6 A LOT. And i never watched the clone wars... So instead of spending my money for episode 7-9 i will spend my money on clone wars who tells a compelling Story and actually give more depth to the prequels

[@MrFuggleGuggle]

This trilogy was more ‘Star Tours’ than ‘Star Wars’. Good riddance.

[@danielijust8776]

@Curly Que not rlly

[@linus5171]

Daniel Ijust Yes. Watch through all of clone wars. It has filler episodes but each season except the newest has 20+ episodes. It gives you such a good view of Star Wars.

[@maddox471]

Palpatine staged a war playing both sides and fooling the most powerful people in the galaxy then kills them all and takes over the galaxy and then ends up killing himself with his own lightning

[@VinyLegends]

Do it

[@malcolmjenkins3585]

The man who took over the entire galaxy using his wit loses in the end because he made a thousand ships connected to a single radio tower.

[@peteryang2067]

****kills himself with his own lightning TWICE

[@jackdamascus4506]

I would rather a version of this movie where palpating wins by just using his smarts as he did in the prequels, instead of a badder version of the death star

[@jackdamascus4506]

Like if leia died instead of holdo, then holdo is in charge, but it turns out she’s a puppet for palpatine to control the resistance, and the order at the same time, throw in a plot where their battles get more and more deaths, due to purposefully bad information and then boom little bit better

[@BasementPepperoni]

"Imagine getting a job at Subway, and after 3 days of employee training you ask the Manager if you can be his son." LOLOLOLOL!! I just smashed my face into my keyboard no less than 50 times from laughing so hard!

[@eirich804]

I love how every actor of the triology tried to tell the audience that the movie was trash

[@blitz4779]

Cant really blame the actors, they legit tried and made this trilogy barely watchable. It's really all on JJ

[@sammcdermott78]

Jack Lutz I feel so bad for mark did you see how depressed he looked when he would have interviews for the last Jedi

[@lijevasisa]

same with GOT season 8...

[@yveltalpoderoso1303]

For me jj was the problem, last Jedi was the only movie of the new Star Wars movies I liked , if rise of skywalker followed everything last Jedi set up , people would remember last Jedi more kindly

[@blitz4779]

@@yveltalpoderoso1303 even then people look back on last jedi as at least conceptually interesting. So it still made last jedi looks decent

[@mix3k818]

Rey burying that lightsaber in sand is the ultimate insult to Anakin.

[@amberdeyuliis7886]

This whole trilogy is an insult to Anakin and his character arch

[@vhscopyofseinfeld]

@@amberdeyuliis7886 and Luke

[@caixote123]

@@vhscopyofseinfeld and all the other characters

[@smolneko9294]

what about taking his last name for her own? especially *after* she buried the saber?

[@raafeyplayz7015]

@@smolneko9294 that too

[@jonas7318]

Rey buried Anakin's lightsaber in the sand even though Anakin hates sand.

[@FilmsNerf2]

Its cold, coarse, and rough. And it gets everywhere. Now its all over his lightsaber.

[@totallyanonymousbish9599]

Not just sand. THE sand!

[@vernusred4757]

"I don't like sand" is stupid phrase but you forget the message of the ending scene Rey buried Leia's lightsaber with her Father lightsaber on planet where Anakin was born and where Luke grew up. If you don't like scene it's your problem because ending scene in movie is not sopouse to be as many expect it to be.

[@totallyanonymousbish9599]

vernus red Her father's lightsaber, that that somehow still there lmao

[@eachasteriod1334]

vernus red it’s stupid she buried anakin’s lightsaber in a place he hates and Leia’s lightsaber in a place she didn’t grow up.

[@chucklapine6782]

The biggest crime of the sequel trilogy is that they squandered the last chance to see the original characters on screen for the last time.

[@allenharper2928]

Yup. That pic that showed Luke, Han, Leia, Chewy, and Landon in the cockpit of the Falcon still hurts to see. The "what might have been".

[@jeremy4375]

The biggest crime is that Lucas could've had his cake and ate it too. Imagine a sequel trilogy out in '99, when the OT characters still looked like themselves vs. plastic surgery. Imagine a prequel trilogy put out in 2015, when the CGI really started to get good. Sellout to Disney in '20...get a Darth Revan storyline... Doesn't that timeline sound nice? 🤠👍 * edit spelling

[@jonathangetachew1522]

This trilogy is so insulting to the original movies it's honestly mindblowing when you stop to think about it.

[@thor3432]

It's not.

[@matthewkrieg8068]

Yep, because JJ cannot make a good script and Rian just forced his own story into star wars and be damned if it makes no sense

[@mirusso]

Wow you never left your parents basement. #sad

[@jonathangetachew1522]

@@thor3432 By the end of this trilogy, Luke, Leia, and Han are all dead, plus Luke was an asshole and a coward before he died. Palpatine is still alive, therefore making Vader's sacrifice in vein The granddaughter of Palpatine is still alive, while the Skywalker's are all dead, there is no one with Skywalker blood alive at the moment, and she takes the Skywalker name If that's not insulting to you, then I truly envy you.

[@mitthrawnuruodo3632]

Matthew Krieg I think that if JJ did the visuals, but someone with sense had done the scripts, 7 would have been better. Someone else should have made 8, probably the same person who made the scripts to 7 so it makes sense. Then 9 would actually make sense, and would be a good ending to the saga. To top it all off, have JJ doing visuals with somebody else making sure they make sense, and then the sequels could possibly be good. Either way, they would be better than what we were given.

[@matchungo8048]

This trilogy fits together like those celebrities singing imagine

[@FixingDisneyStarWars]

#truth

[@nillynush4899]

and just as cringe.

[@Alicat0314]

That’s just facts man

[@dzhellek]

Ow! I had erased that from my mind. Now it hurts all over again.

[@RedRocket415]

DisinterestedYak and has as much logic and brainpower as a “Reopen Michigan” rally

[@elmecaniconaranja1126]

The worst thing in all the trilogy is luke throwing his father's lightsaber, the physical representation of redemption, the reminder of the old republic and jedi that fought for democracy and freedom and galaxy, the gift from his first master, Obi wan kenobi, who respect anakin as a brother. All of this just dump out for the laughs

[@SmilerAmv314]

While its indeed dumb, i dont think thats what ruined it. more like the retconning from TROS, which is actually disgusting. THe last jedi wasnt a good movie but atleast it tried to close down some plots so that the finale could focus on the actual conflict or give other characters a time to shine. Instead we get a ''rey trying to find her lineage'' for the fucking third time. This is what makes it a failed trilogy. By the end it managed to say absolutly nothing. Say what you want about the last jedi but its definitly the more superiour movie in this trilogy. The force awakens is just a nostalgia trip and TROS is a retcon to try and please an already dissapointed fanbase.

[@xd_mystyyyyy]

@@SmilerAmv314 The retconning in TRoS is better than the lightsaber throw in TLJ because the TRos Retcon makes sense but yeah I understand.

[@pittland44]

@@SmilerAmv314 Well that's really the problem, what's the absolute worst part of all of this? Because I really have a hard time trying to pin that down.

[@SmilerAmv314]

@@xd_mystyyyyy It doesnt make sense tho, why ruin the wholfe franchise because of fan backlash? try and build on it thats how you fix it. The last jedi is the only movie in the sequels that actually told a story. Mark my words in a few years we will look back towards the last jedi and Tros and notice how much potential JJ abrams actually wasted. From Kylo ren his mask to Rey finishing her story we all lost that for a predicatble basic kids ending and a bad Deus ex machina at that. I reccomend watching "Why I loved the last jedi" By Stephan Krosecz, He can explain my points 10 times better than I can in this limited comment.

[@batman3698]

@@SmilerAmv314 TLJ just hogged plot lines and didn't set anything up for tros. At the end of TLJ the sequel trilogy was in a tailspin and I knew the moment I saw it that they were in a dead end and that the next movie would also suck. Personally I put the blame of the complete failure of the sequels solely on The Last Jedi.

[@countof3everybodyOD]

It was very nice of the Knights of Ren to wait to try until he had a lightsaber…and it was very nice of you to not mention that the reason he didn’t have a lightsaber is because he threw away his red joint for literally no reason other than to be unarmed so Rey could teleport him one

[@MaxAbramson3]

Why the hell does everyone throw away their light saber right before Palpitatine electricutes them? I mean, that's got to be written in one of those jedi texts somewhere!

[@andrewzoo4018]

I remember this documentary where George Lucas said “ It was too much for me to handle so I retired, but I needed someone to run the company. I thought of Kathleen! We had worked together before and she seemed like she knew what she was doing.” -famous last words

[@elvenbuttress]

It was at this moment George knew, He f**ked up.

[@deadpanbarry5442]

I'd buy that for a dollor.

[@kesterspecter5510]

RIP

[@JCDenton3]

He also said he hired her because she was able to help him move some stuff out of his garage once. Sounds more like a Lucas reason to give someone control of your dream lol.

[@politicallycorrectredskin796]

I read a book about Dostoevsky, and he had the same pressure towards the end of his life. Working on the biggest novel he had ever written, had epilepsy, gambling problems, money problems and was gonna die soon. He didn't have the amazing Kathleen Kennedy, though, so he did what any self-respecting, epileptic 19th century Russian with a gambling problem would do: he locked himself in a room until he was done and then died. The result was the best novel in human history, while the result of having the amazing Kathleen Kennedy instead was the most horrifically bad movie trilogy in human history. Lock yourself in a room until you're done next time. That's my conclusion. Lucas legacy will now be that he lived in Hollywood and wrote some horseshit. He deserves better, but hey: these movies exist now because of him. He's gonna have to wear it.

[@erikknudsenmork4536]

Can we just talk about how pissed Anakin must be now that the lightsaber that he made is now burried under sand.

[@nunofyerbusiness198]

kylo BEN. Krylon Rentboy. Downlow Bentover.

[@Luis-vy9bm]

He buried his mom in sand too.

[@u.v.s.5583]

I hate sand. It is coarse and irritating and gets everywhere, even in my lightsaber.

[@christopherscott6854]

At least she tucked it in a nice space blanky.

[@dexterjettster3683]

Yeah

[@ginghinaandrei5013]

Rey : buries Anakin's lightsaber in sand. Anakin: *dark side rage scream*

[@Izayoii_Hotaru]

@@stefod3052 damn you beat me to it

[@whiterabbit75]

"I hate Mary Sues. They're coarse, rough, and they get into everything."

[@johnwitek4891]

@@stefod3052 YOU WERE THE ADOPTED ONE!! YOU WERE SUPPOSE TO PASS DOWN THE LIGHTLABER TO YOUR CHILDREN NOT LEAVE IT IN SAND!!!

[@lukemoses7827]

yOu MEaN rEy’S LiGhTSaBER. I’m kidding

[@marcsonic01]

@@flynnjacobs9752 It’s coarse and rough and irritating… and it gets everywhere.

[@mdruben]

The fact that Rey has no arc, that she is so powerful from the beginning without any training it befuddles me. No redemption qualities. No flaws. Nothing to buildup.

[@DemonicRemption]

@mdruben Yeah Rey is a token female in a franchise she's meant to lead. Have fun with that train of thought...

[@therealpyrotf2]

I don't even get why people fight the idea that she's a Mary sue- I mean she has all the traits of one: -jack of all trades -kind and caring and loyal and brave -has no negative traits such as something as small as temptation or shit -you guys continue

[@USpatriot741776]

"The character who's potential was tragically wasted by this trilogy" Do you have any idea how little that narrows it down.

[@BobBob-of7fg]

I cannot think of one character whose potential was properly used.

[@gamingguy1010]

@@BobBob-of7fg Phasm... oh wait lol

[@NexusKin]

That's literally every single character in the sequel trilogy, new and old!

[@defourruben]

Well we know it's not gonna be a stormtroop... Oh yeah Finn.

[@yudhiadhyatmikosiswono9082]

Disney sequel has no plan since beginning so i am not surprised if this movie lore are trainwreck.

[@cbowser3]

The Sequel Trilogy isn’t canon.

[@purestmelody6285]

God, that’d be nice.

[@cheeselover4379]

I honestly agree. They ruined too much for me to accept them as canon

[@RaheemRollair]

I will consent to that comment immensely.

[@zealousdoggo]

The sequels were in cannon but then we fired the cannon

[@geraldcleveland6207]

@Zealous Doggo nah it was never canon

[@Horrormaster13]

*The Star Wars Original Trilogy:* When you have a vision, but barely the resources and leeway to bring it to life. The Star Wars Prequel Trilogy: When you have a vision, but too much leeway and resources to do what you want. The Star Wars Sequel Trilogy: When you have no vision, no plan, but unlimited resources, and decide to play mad libs with it.

[@lluewhyn]

Good analogy. One thing that you could say about the Prequel Trilogy is that the bad parts were mostly consistent. The sequel trilogy is incoherent from film to film.

[@BlargeMan]

Thats a really good way of describing it

[@lifetodamax]

Well said. Limits often make you more creative. Necessity is the mother of invention. Struggles make the victory sweeter. There were no limits or struggle. There was no fight to make a movie they loved and believed in. It was a hurry up and here's a bunch of money to crap out a movie we are obligated to make. Star Wars: The Unstoppable Bowel Movement.

[@alphadoughnut2651]

Horrormaster13 I still felt that the original trilogy was able to complete its vision

[@claifers1841]

Prequels were fucking lit

[@TripleA332]

The scene where Leia just flies around in the middle of space when the ship cockpit gets blown up is so goofy and bad it cracks me up

[@Buzzy_Bland]

Rey: **Buries Anakin’s lightsaber in the sand** Anakin’s Force Ghost: *_Screams of agony_*

[@meesalopia404]

I dont like sand.

[@sammcdermott78]

Chris Doyle it’s coarse and tough and irritating and it gets everywhere

[@zyshock]

Disney says its rey's lightsaber talk about disney being rude

[@dakkarnemo1094]

@@zyshock It will always be the Skywalker lightsaber to me. Just because Rey possessed it and calls herself a Skywalker doesn't mean it's her's.

[@riotsui6275]

YOUR LIGHTSABER WILL MAKE A FINE ADDITION TO MY COLLECTION

[@brayden2254]

Why didn't Anakin's ghost appear to Luke years ago and say "hey son Palpatine is alive on a planet called Exogol and luckily I have a wayfinder hidden on Mustafar so that you can go there and end him"

[@nadrewod999]

Because Disney had literally no plan with the sequel trilogy, and just threw shit at the CGI wall until it stuck.

[@Sableantelopeenjoyer]

Because lazy writing

[@banditoheat]

Luke had his Force phone on silent and it went straight to voicemail.

[@xd_mystyyyyy]

Yeah or “Hey son don’t kill Kylo in his MOTHER FUCKING SLEEP because he won’t turn to the dark side if you don’t ok.”

[@JakeDude500]

God this one fucking sentence would have made a better plotline for a sequel trilogy than what we got.

[@CinematicSeriesGaming]

I am absolutely astonished that a giant corporation with virtually unlimited resources, who can cast the best actors and hire the best screenwriters and directors in the world, managed to fuck up the whole trilogy in such a spectacular way that a mediocre fanfiction is more interesting and cohesive in comparison. It's fucking impressive to be honest. On paper Star Wars sequel trilogy is simply impossible to ruin. There are so many amazing books, comics and games to pull ideas from and they had so much time to carefully plan everything ahead that it's simply unbelievable to me that they managed to shit on the franchise in such an extreme fashion. I'm 100% certain that George Lucas is furious as fuck and he regrets ever selling Star Wars to Disney. The money made him fabulously rich but in exchange his amazing legacy was raped and murdered in the most horrible way he could have imagined.

[@bobwish8851]

think George Lucas legacy has been improved/cleared because of the disney movies everyone will think his movies are way better then disneys movies and unless Lucas buys the franchise back, disney will have a up hill battle to prove otherwise plus people finally stop complaining about the prequels been the worst thing to ever happen to star wars

[@compoundlift7578]

It's because they don't get what Lucas was doing, they don't get the style guide, they don't get the themes, they don't get the visual language. You just go into star wars like some blockbuster, you need a deep understanding of the history of cinema theory to even shoot it correctly. Not because it's super sophisticated, but because certain techniques fit the style and others break it. Lucas had a distinct way of doing things and, even in the OT, breaking those rules makes the film feel fake.

[@thunderbird1921]

If you look back at Disney the last 10 years or so, none of us should have been surprised by this. Other than Marvel, since 2010 or so most of Disney's film writing has been an absolute DISASTER. TFA gave me a little hope, but TLJ confirmed all my fears plus worse. I give Marvel several years tops before Disney totally destroys them too.

[@justinstewart1057]

@@thunderbird1921 "Other than Marvel, since 2010 or so most of Disney's film writing has been an absolute DISASTER." No they haven't. Name some Disney movies that are NOT Star Wars, that have been disasters.

[@justinstewart1057]

@cinematic series gaming, "On paper Star Wars sequel trilogy is simply impossible to ruin." Except it's not impossible to ruin. Disney didn't plan out the trilogy like they should have, which is why the movies feel disconnected plain and simple. You talk about Disney like it's some invincible titan that could do no wrong until Star Wars came about. ANY business, or company, no matter how big, can mess up if they don't plan properly. It's happened with Nintendo, the company behind Game of Thrones, etc. If you're astonished that Disney is capable of messing up, and you're astonished that *ANY* large corporation can mess up, then you're just ignorant.

[@minecrafter3448]

This is your magnum opus. The pinnacle of your reviewing skill combined with masterful control over humor. This review is better planned out than the entire sequel trilogy, and it doesn’t even have a story.

[@jasonatobol]

Palpatine: My plan is for you Rey to kill me so my power can get into you and `we` can rule the galaxy. Rey: I don`t kill you then. 5 minutes later: Rey kills Palpatine as the happy ending resolution of the movie.

[@toryanderson5920]

I didn’t even think of this🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ aye aye aye

[@TeenWithACarrotIDK]

Ah yes, Saying something bad will happen for the sake of making the story barley dramatic, but then removing the consequences of the main characters actions, so that the writers don’t have to try. My favorite modern movie trope.

[@raafeyplayz7015]

The worst part is that Rey kills him in anger....

[@DoctorDestyNova]

From the sound of this I would rather read some books that aren’t Star Wars

[@KabillaTaco]

@@DoctorDestyNova check out DUNE

[@logicaldude3611]

I think one of the most frustrating things about Rey is that she is remarkably well-adjusted and well-groomed for a desert scavenger girl who was abandoned as a child. It's like the entire series put no thought into trying to figure out how someone who grew up in a situation like that should look and act. "Let's just put this cute British girl in there and give her the personality of your average millennial, that will be our main character."

[@razkable]

they make her so lame...i don't get why they gave her lightning for one scene just to spoil her palpatine lineage...it would hold more weight if a force push tug of war with kylo occurred with the ship cause then the reveal of her family name is kinda unexpected and i may have cared more when she thought she killed a friend cause she was not thinking and got too emotional..with lightning it just takes you out of the scene cause its so forced no pun intended..you were not prepared for it...its like wtf she can do that?..

[@RomanSimkins]

@@razkable Exactly, shocky hands aren't hereditary......

[@Rin19862002]

There are many human female on Tatooin, they teach her when she was small (possibly). In a community, minority people take care of their own kind and share time to take care for their orphan children :( Beside, their technology is very advanced, they can build up some droids for hair designing and clothing etc.

[@Rin19862002]

@@flynncarter229 I guess it is difficult for men to teach small girls about women things, so female human will group up and share time to teach her. There are many kind of creature in Star wars, female human seems more spectific...

[@thefly6537]

To be fair to the casting department, Daisy Ridley isn't too hard to look at...

[@atlas3556]

Rey: "This blade has done terrible things" Also Rey: *Carrying the Padawan Slayer 5000*

[@ИванПанин-ь5ю]

Excuse me, it's Youngling Slayer 9000

[@DoctorDestyNova]

Objects don’t act, people do. You silly people need to study Karma a bit more…

[@Yurikon3]

@@DoctorDestyNova Just cause yer an object for bad stuff does not mean YOU are the bad object.

[@DoctorDestyNova]

@@Yurikon3 Exactly Mr. Reimi, Exactly

[@Leminies]

@@DoctorDestyNova karma isn’t real

[@goatsmiserable555]

I reject any of Disneys “canon”… there was already a wonderful expanded universe with books and comics that puts Disney’s amateur fan fiction to shame… just because they say their story is canon doesn’t mean we have to buy into it … they didn’t earn it

[@joegreen3802]

Ugh. The sequel trilogy...I refuse to acknowledge it as anything more than some shitty fanfiction.

[@thealexgundam5006]

Megaman zero, such good games

[@CrazyBomber22]

"shitty" being key. Nothing wrong with fanfiction.

[@lookingforwookiecopilot]

I feel the same way about the prequels, books, comics, cartoons, and video games. :-)

[@yatharthjain2273]

Even fanfiction isn’t that bad

[@joegreen3802]

@@lookingforwookiecopilot Hey, I'll take Legends over this crap any day of the week

[@jdfuller1483]

Why is nobody freaking out about how well made this video is? I can only imagine how many hours this thing took to make. Thanks for grinding for this man, respect.

[@lavish263team5]

Certainly a lot longer than what it took to plan this movie

[@JustAGuyWhoLikesStuff.]

@@lavish263team5 true.

[@cdixon198]

His pinned comment says 3 months

[@vito]

You have no idea. Thanks for respecting the grind.

[@Smerpyderp]

lavish 263 team Is that really saying much though?

[@insertfunnynamehere8617]

Rey: I’m Rey skywalker Me: identity theft in Star Wars

[@binaldoshi495]

Identity theft is not a joke Rey. Millions of families suffer every year.

[@reduxboi.8586]

@@binaldoshi495 tell that to disney

[@timtim3110]

Rey: im Rey Skywalker Me: *Visible Confusion*

[@KrillLiberator]

Is it the worst final line in cinema?

[@manuelcaycedo561]

the way you edited the guy at 9:20 eagerly waitng for jj to answer his question while he impatiently fidgets around hahahahaha this whole video is gold thank you for your time and effort man..highly appreciated my good sir

[@jamiebraswell5520]

That guy was an idiot. Anyone who got excited about seeing the huge chunks of Death Star on a planetary surface is just an idiot. It should not have taken Palpatine's laugh to make them question things. In fact, why the hell were people still excited at this point when it was clear that the sequel trilogy was garbage? Stupid fans willing to keep on fueling Disney's bad film series.

[@timewarpdrive77]

The real crime is that a real squeal trilogy can never be made. Mark Hammil has been turned off, ford still doesn't want to do star wars, and fisher is dead... Why, disney.....

[@christopha1955]

Who needs big budget movies. TV/streaming is where its at now. We know they can do the Mandalorian right. Just make a series taking place after Return of the Jedi.

[@DeadKraken]

@Justice Sparks There are rumors that Lucasfilms will try, in the next year or two, to fix this shit with new series(animated and live action) books, comics and some even say releasing different cuts of the sequel movies to retcon some elements. I believe that's all they can do right now. Disney ain't gonna "reboot" the movies, and for sure they will NEVER make the sequels non-canon just for the huge amount of money they have invested into it, so their only hope is that they retcon their own shit so much that the fans will come back. I mean, they even managed to piss off the Kylo Ren stans and the reylos, not even TLJ could archieve that, lower than this they cannot go 😂

[@Breeboi_j]

Disney didn’t do a thing dumb fuck. Kennedy. Kennedy fucked us, Disney just promotes it. Note to everyone in the comments, DISNEY IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR RUININGING STARWARS. Disney is simply the owner and promoter, you can’t claim they ruined it even they have no control over directing the films. And they unlike Kennedy love starwars, and want to promote it, they are the reason we have galaxies edge, and all the Easter eggs from the films within the land, as well as everything you could have wanted as a kid. Kennedy is the person to blame, and as of now she has been announced to be fired this year. She has zero control over anything starwars and is working to quit. kzbin.info/www/bejne/oorCk2OXqs9pqZI

[@slamexo0]

The mandalorian isn’t even that good lol. They still didn’t do mandalorians correctly tbh

[@timewarpdrive77]

@@christopha1955 No, they can't do the mandalorian right. Just by the fact that its part of this broken new continuity, its bad, which doesn't even mention how bad it is on its own.

[@batfitch4207]

The sequels are a fever dream Han Solo had during his time frozen in carbonite

[@torgejh9189]

That is what I'm gonna keep telling myself from now on to forget this steaming pile of trash was ever considered canon.

[@chasehedges6775]

Truer words have never been spoken.

[@senorbolainas2991]

No no thoose are the nightmares of Anakin of ep3

[@linkthepig4219]

Y e s

[@doncorleole2356]

I’m telling myself that Luke got a little too drunk at the Endor party and had a bad dream, but I like your version

[@ww2-epicbattles]

Count Dooku: "I've been looking forward to this."

[@timurjack8773]

Maul: ''How charming that you actually believe that statement to be true.''

[@jagtech490]

tevfik enis I haven’t seen season seven so is that one of his quotes?

[@impulse5674]

My hype has doubled since the last Jedi video, count

[@thebigpig2364]

*sees vito's final video* This is where the fun begins

[@timurjack8773]

@@jagtech490 yes

[@Arendvdvenk]

The only good thing the sequels did was make it easier to find new funny commentary channels. Glad to see you're still at it.

[@jmace2424]

Let’s just lump this in the trash can labeled “Disney remakes” and call it a day.

[@tutorialstipsandtricks1042]

Amen

[@aaron75fy]

I think you mean "Disney's bad fan fiction"

[@tutorialstipsandtricks1042]

No star wars fan would ever write something as awful as this. Im pretty sure the directors of these movies had never even heard of star wars

[@aaron75fy]

@@tutorialstipsandtricks1042 unless you've been living under a rock for the past half century I doubt you won't have heard of Star Wars

[@tutorialstipsandtricks1042]

These guys crawled out from the lowest trench in the ocean

[@coalescence3835]

I'm glad he said "Anakin's Lightsaber" not "Rey's Lightsaber."

[@Maxyman13423]

The only other person that lightsaber belongs to; is Luke

[@phoenixgray9231]

@@Maxyman13423 nah its anakins youngling slayer 9000

[@primenationgamer5710]

@@Maxyman13423 it belong to the chosen one

[@batman3698]

@@phoenixgray9231 I guess he meant the only person other than Anakin?

[@aaron75fy]

well she stole everything else from the skywalkers so we really shouldn't be surprised

[@fracturedfingers]

It's true. The deaths of the 3 main characters from the original trilogy were handled so badly, there wasn't any weight to any of them. Even the way Ackbar was killed was a joke.

[@5tm422]

I didn't even knew he died

[@isaacmarrufo8935]

@@5tm422 he died when Leah did the force move through space thing

[@death-king1834]

Lando's co-pilot Nien Nunb was also killed unceremoniously in the final battle on Exogol.

[@ultrabigfella]

@@death-king1834 I'm pretty sure Wedge Antilles was killed there too. Chewbacca is the ONLY one left. We better get a movie or show for him.

[@death-king1834]

@@ultrabigfella Wasn't Wedge on the Falcon?

[@Dancingontgesun1942]

Oh my God I'm only 10 minutes in and this is one of the best Star wars reviews on KZbin all time , I'm on the floor laughing

[@dronesclubhighjinks]

Also try "MauLer" and "Little Platoon" channels if you like Star Wars longform critique + humor!

[@markrezk9775]

I was more excited for this video than I was for the actual movie.

[@ghostgalaxy2000]

Same here honestly , when i saw the thumbnail i was like ' oh wow he actually made one of these for rise too!'

[@sunekoo]

Still haven’t seen it

[@thebigpig2364]

I was anticipating this video before the movie was even here

[@draw_ki_]

LOL

[@osodeanteojosyt]

True, for this and other videos too

[@beckettmaffei]

Just imagine... *Ten-year-old Anakin:* "'Ight let me just restrict Threepio so he can't read Sith" Edit: Hehe, I've done it... I've infiltrated the comment section... congratulations everyone, you've just given a Last Jedi fan a top comment. But seriously, thanks 💗

[@love.uriell]

Extremely underrated comment

[@aldyrasyid]

@@love.uriell can someone pls explain lol

[@love.uriell]

@@aldyrasyid 10 year old anakin constructed C-3PO. Why on earth would a 10 year old kid restrict a droid from reading such a specific language, which he probably didn’t even know existed. (3PO not being able to read sith language was holding Rey and all of them from reading the dagger in TROS)

[@quinetastic]

One needs just assume that the restriction on not reading *Sith* was made at some future point in time, after 3-pos creation by Anakin...

[@nicholashodges201]

I guess it could have been built into whatever library was used for his 6 mil languages. Still weak, why make him able to read them in the first place?

[@donhill1825]

Everything about the "Gotcha!" compilation is goddam hilarious.

[@jasonfarrell00]

It’s great seeing other channels trying to rip off it and then I re-find this channel and remember how gloriously well it is done 👍👍👍👍

[@fatpizza7810]

The clown music perfectly sums up how much of a circus the Disney sequels were.

[@tacoenvy]

Dude I was dying, it was so well done and the music makes it even better

[@account1307]

Agreed

[@mattgee4867]

Yeah it was already my favorite part in the last jedi video

[@Hhifix]

#11:34 The entire sequel trilogy plot Snoke And Ryan Johnson: you take that ridiculous thing off… Kylo: *takes it off* Palpatine And JJ Abrams: you put that ridiculous thing back on..

[@Robert-Peterson]

"A good question...for another time." This isn't just the writing philosophy of the trilogy, it's the writing philosophy of JJ Abrams' entire career. In the series "Lost" the character Ben Linus said the following statement about 50 times: "The answers are coming Jack. But right now we have to go." JJ Abrams has NO IDEA how to formulate a conclusion/wrap up of ANY plot thread he's ever introduced into any project he's ever worked on. He has made more money than God doing nothing but keeping the audience off-balance by simply "throwing more shit at them" without answering a fucking thing about anything going on in his "stories". The instant you hear that JJ Abrams is attached to any project in ANY capacity, expect nonsensical bullshit. It is the core of his existence.

[@thebigpig2364]

The only “good” movie I can think of that he made is Mission Impossible 3

[@zoomin9397]

i liked lost until like season 4 i think when the confusion was just too much and i just couldnt watch it without just asking what in the hell was going on. and also that charlie died, he was the heart and soul of the show for me

[@grappo77]

So true Jar jar really sucks at making 2nd and 3rd act.. JJ.. the new spielberg.. my ass!

[@njnjhjh8918]

Even gave a fucking TED talk about the mystery box

[@tottekallkvist2633]

JJ was not even involved in more than a few episodes at the beginning of Lost

[@mr.ditkovich6379]

When you realise that Palpatine was a clone, Snoke was a clone, Rey is a clone. Everyone is a fucking clone in this "trilogy"!!!

[@ks4158]

Hi Rey Skywalker... WHY you buried Anakin lightsaber into sand?

[@mr.ditkovich6379]

@@ks4158 Because I don't like that guy

[@ks4158]

@@mr.ditkovich6379 but what about Kylo ren? U have a crush on him

[@mr.ditkovich6379]

@@ks4158 It was a compliment because he revived me

[@kaytosh5735]

@@mr.ditkovich6379 He's coarse, and rough, and irritating... And he gets everywhere.

[@helohi9701]

I will never forget when I saw it in theaters how negative the audiences reaction was when Rey called herself "Skywalker" people were booing and throwing trash at the screen

[@dough7726]

I was so confused when she said she was Skywalker

[@Sinsmoke_]

Its like stealing the name of your boyfriends dead uncle

[@Sinsmoke_]

It would have been better if she said she is a palpatine.She accepts that she is a palpatine

[@Sinsmoke_]

@@Misery2331 I would have liked to be there so i can throw trash too

[@MP-vf8qz]

I missed it and thanks for giving me another reason, but I wasn't planning on watching it again anyways 😭

[@Schizniit]

When Mark Hamil, one of the kindest actors in the entire industry is warning us about JJ, you know it's bad. Mark can usually make things good, but even though he tried to save these movies, he knew he couldn't.

[@magivenderstudios]

Yes , he made an interview about this that he warned us about the last jedi .

[@Maladjester]

He could have helped by not being in them.

[@dub537h]

Kindest actor? I'd have to call that as BS. His acting wasn't even very good!

[@herosshade2247]

"I think it's ok for heroes to stumble without deconstructing them" Yeah, it's Empire Strikes Back, still the most highly regarded Star Wars movie of all time.

[@Taylor-kh1mf]

The fact that luke went to kill Ben is really infuriating because the point of him going to vader in return of the jedi is because he believed that he could bring back Anakin Skywalker without killing him.

[@frydsaman6857]

@@Taylor-kh1mf he didn't go to kill ben he didnt actually go at all, his projection went as a distraction so that the others could escape

[@user-qk3nq6cg7r]

@@frydsaman6857 I think Taylor is talking about when Luke tried to kill Kylo in his sleep

[@SpectralLuna6277]

The best description of the sequel trilogy I've ever heard. "A tug of war between two rich egotistical kids on how to play with their toys". What a waste of potential and disrespect to the entire saga...

[@pascalsimioli6777]

You forgot "white" but to be fair it was a pointless adjective in this context

[@blackout4328]

Cry about it.

[@thomaslong4909]

@@blackout4328 you have no taste. Don’t ask questions, just consume product, get excited for next product.

[@deathsquad8891]

@@blackout4328 L

[@irishinstigator7854]

@@blackout4328 That seems to be the only three words you know...are you unable to make a big boy opinion?

[@9-11wasthecoolestthingever9]

It just baffles the mind how they couldn’t hire any talented writers despite the fact that Disney has access to some of the best talent in the world

[@Biggiiful]

They absolutely could. But Kathleen wasn't interested in good writers. She wanted far left lackey activists to push nonsensical political bs.

[@MrSloth-tl5yv]

Rogue one is proof they can make a decent movie that has good characters and story, but naw. That’s too much effort

[@Hannibal457]

@@MrSloth-tl5yv I thought the story and characters in Rogue One were nonexistent.

[@skrapapa92]

​@@Biggiiful WTF are you talking about? It's unrelated to politics it's just shitty writing lmao .

[@Biggiiful]

@@skrapapa92 only if you don't realize that the same ideology that the shitty writing was based upon (post modernism and critical theory) is the same ideolgy that the far left is ascribing too. It's the same. It originates from the same acedemics and it's goal is to destroy culture, meaning, and any semblance of objectivism. The writing staff on these films arent star wars people. They are woke activists. Kathleen Kennedy is the bad kind of feminist, and Rian Johnson destroyed the lore and meaning with his postmodern deconstruction of what Star Wars is supposed to be. Yes, it might seem extreme to compare Star Wars with the political landscape.....but when you dive in depth to the core of what's going on it's the same culture war based on the same academic ideas. Quite literally.

[@brentc2411]

Imagine if Rey had fallen to the dark side in episode 8, while Kilo had made the decision to seek redemption in the light, and the complex story that would potentially unfold as Kilo, the man who basically murdered 5 planets, wants to fight for the Resistance to stop the Darkside force that has filled the vacuum left by the Sith, lead by Rey.

[@dub537h]

I'd watch the hell outta that

[@redreaper2752]

The best way to “subvert expectations” would have been for Kylo to live. And if someone HAD to die then they should have killed Rey.

[@Puggy42069]

I would have cheered in the theater if they killed off Rey.

[@lorddrayvon1426]

Another weird fact. Supposedly, Palpatine was supposed to remain dead and The Son from the Mortis Arc was supposed to be the orchestrator of everything. Would explain how Palpatine went from powerful but not infallible Sith to nigh unkillable. The Son was the literal physical embodiment of all evil although whether he was worse than Palpatine in terms of evil is unclear. Why was this changed? Disney CEO Bob Igar felt that, since The Son comes from The Clone Wars exclusively. It would alienate those not familiar with him. For once, I kinda agree. Being invested in The Son as a big "OH SHIT!" moment relies upon knowing what the hell he was as part of that arc. Still probably would have been better than what we got here though.

[@radahn42]

The best way to subvert expectations would be to make a good, watchable movie, it would be the biggest twist ever in the sequal trilogy

[@jakubmadejski1481]

@@Puggy42069 I just hate Rey but I also don't really care about the new trillogy [ even forgot about it for a year ] so tbh I would cheer too.

[@badnoodlez]

Well technically Rey did die...for a split second lol

[@lilrayallen13]

That "gotcha" segment has to be one of the greatest criticisms of Star Wars I've seen. Nothing is ever real. There are no consequences. Nobody actually dies (except for the characters we actually like)

[@brandoncamarillomusic]

i lost it at the magic grandpa gotcha

[@theparrishshow9803]

Can I have a timestamp because I can’t find the scene and this video is long as hell

[@lilrayallen13]

@@theparrishshow9803 10:49 is when he starts listing off the "gotchas"

[@theparrishshow9803]

@@lilrayallen13 That scene is gold

[@spencerjohnson8714]

Please make more Gotcha videos of all the Hollywood garbage out there

[@RandomGuy-ej9gr]

Rise of Skywalker? More like the Fall of Skywalker since they're all dead...

[@iloveutubesince3207]

"Rise of Palpatine" would fit better.

[@mr.ditkovich6379]

"Rise of Mary Sue" would be even better

[@grproteus]

"Rey was an impostor" would be the best

[@death-king1834]

I prefer to call it "The Rise of the Retcons". Cause it literally retcons everything in the Saga. It retcons the Original Trilogy, the Prequels, the Clone Wars, the Last Jedi and even Abram's own Force Awakens.

[@freebee8221]

even before this pos movie came out i remember thinking that rise of skywalker is a STUPID title. i honestly thought it was a joke. (and now i know it was)

[@totterdell]

Palpatine somehow assembled a secret cult of 8 million people to f**** the Sh** out of each other and build spaceships - emperor palpatine ladies and gentlemen the greatest motivator in the history of the universe - that killed me XD

[@youngefaucet2713]

Disney doesn’t really care about the fact that people didn’t like their work, they’re just happy they got the money.

[@shaesullivan]

Typical drug dealer.

[@thunderbird1921]

Let's be honest folks, we should have seen this coming. Disney's writing outside of Wreck It Ralph 1 and Marvel (which they don't actually make themselves) has mostly been an absolute DISASTER the last ten years or more. Not to mention Disney almost NEVER respects the source material.

[@notsae66]

Except the lasting damage to their reputation, ip value, and profits have and will continue to cause extraordinary financial losses that they very much have noticed and are panicking hard over.

[@RDR911]

Kaleem McIntyre most of the drug dealers I know at least care about their product.

[@Bothandle70]

they care. that is why they retconned the shit out of TLJ.

[@pokemonhero7720]

JJ Abrams' son: Why was I born? JJ: A good question, for another time.

[@MatthewSmith-wv5fi]

Thats a great dig.

[@aivb81588]

"Kylo Ren has his own army of knights?? Oh my god, I bet their totally badass!" I remember thinking this in the Force Awakens. How wrong I was. And how stupid they were. Jesus.

[@h-p4185]

thedrewsview And they were the other surviving pupils of Luke. So there must have been two factions forming in Luke’s school the masked ones and the bathrobe wearing ones. How did these factions form? What was the training like? How did Kylo become the leader of one faction? And the epic battle between the two.

[@erickpuma1202]

@@h-p4185 you are using your brain, that's a big "no no" for this trilogy.

[@TheGingiGamer]

@@h-p4185 And how did Kylo find Snoke?

[@aivb81588]

@Harry-Pekka Kuusela its a lot of story telling potential. It could have been explored in Episode 8, but Rian Jackass went in such a backward direction, i still think he torpedoed the sequel trilogy. Ep. 8 prompted JJ to shove as much shit as he could in Ep. 9. What a bunch of clowns. but to @Erick Puma 's point, you have to have your brain off and just enjoy the pretty colors to find worth in this crap trilogy.

[@aivb81588]

@@TheGingiGamer exactly! How did that all go down?? "I have been every voice - you have ever heard - inside your head." That's it?? That's it? That's all we get. Kylo heard a voice and turned to the dark side. Why would that not be a scene in the movie? Maybe not the entire life of Ben Solo, but come on now.

[@Avsfan23]

“Working at subway for 3 days and then asking the manager if you can be his son” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😅😅😅😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@yaboiyaboy9980]

JJ Abrams after smoking crack: "Guys I got this super good way to end the trilogy. So Palpatine all of a sudden comes back, and we never explain why, and he has a massive fleet that he is going to attack with in 16 hours. But the only way to get to him and kill him is to find this magic triangle. But only two triangles exist. But to find the magic triangle, you need to find this dagger. But the dagger has these sith runes that only C3PO can read. Except he can't read them unless they wipe his mind. Then Rey stands in a perfect spot and takes a protractor hidden in the dagger out which shows her where the magic triangle is on the circle part of the death star. And then Rey and Kylo find the emperor, but he sucks the dyad of their force bond or something up and becomes restored. But ray starts to hear voices of all the jedi and she is able to reflect the emperors lightning back to him and kill him. And then R2D2 restores C3PO's mind." "Should we have Finn do anything important?" *Takes another hit of crack* "Yea good point we should have Finn say "Rey I have something to tell you before we die" and then never explain what he was going to say."

[@raysummer1628]

In revenge of the sith it explains that he learned the power to come back to life from his master

[@narufan987]

@@raysummer1628 not really, it is implied Plagueis knew how to avoid death for his loved ones but not for himself. With Palpatine being one of the strongest Sith ever, he'd likely figure out how to do the same thing (eventually), but it is never even hinted at, not even durint eps VII or VIII

[@shankez4656]

Mr. Spideydude In the movie it’s explained he cloned himself

[@jakobe2076]

@@raysummer1628 just because you can doesnt mean you should

[@DeadKraken]

*Takes another hit of crack, his voice is starts to tremble* "Now..now hear me out....Kylo Ren redeems himself with a memory of his father, not a Force Ghost, just a magical vision and...and then he uses a TIE fighter without hyperdrive to join Rey and doesn't talk for the rest of the movie and his last words are "OW"" "and then?" "Then after the dyad-something scene he's thrown down a shaft and he comes up and he uses his magical spells to revive Rey and then they kiss...you know for the fangirls...and then he dies because he's used too much mana" Kathleen Kennedy: "YES MONEY WELL SPENT!"

[@tomcleaves6853]

"Horrible things have happened with this dagger" as Rey also holds a lightsaber responsible for killing younglings

[@DarthPlato]

The purpose of the dagger was also a rip off of The Goonies.

[@kinagrill]

Which should be on Cloud City, in some big airduct down near the bottom it.... along with the remains of Luke's chopped off, rotting old hand from Episode V.

[@atzuras]

It is true indeed. When I see that dagger I have a flashback of me at the cinema saying "this cannot be happening.. must be a joke"

[@itsjustvin7630]

@@kinagrill easiest explanation couldve been that someone found it, pawned it off, and it led to Maz Kanata's possession. easy solve. fit in a lame joke about how the one who pawned it had a hard time getting off from a grip of a severed arm

[@kinagrill]

@@itsjustvin7630 but then again, that would have fit if the story went that even someone without any grand bloodline, or privileged living can become someone or something galaxy-affecting GREAT. But no, we have magic space-grandfather that is also evil Emperor, cuz everything from prior movies needs to return in some way, and die off.

[@razarryan2465]

That awkward moment when your franchise that began as a cinematic trilogy is now only enjoyable in any media other than film.

[@aidenstubbs7142]

My man Spittin facts

[@kingbash6466]

I know right. I recommend the KOTOR games, especially KOTOR2. That one is a much better deconstruction of the franchise than TLJ ever will be.

[@daal7767]

📠

[@FilmsNerf2]

The Mandolorian is the only thing keeping me hooked to Star Wars. It accomplished something this whole new trilogy couldn't and that's keep me interested in Star Wars. If that goes then I don't know what I'll do with this series. I'll probably just watch the older stuff and wonder to myself "why can't it be this good anymore?"

[@unitedfederalnations3761]

@@FilmsNerf2 watch the Clone Wars, trust me.

[@Kyanzes]

I'm wondering if JJ Abrams actually shit himself when he saw the Last Jedi for the first time, calling Johnson "Mate, this is a cool joke, now where is the real movie? Come on... no... you mean... no...I'm ruined...we are ruined...". -- Also, Finn can sense where the nav signal is coming from but Rey cannot feel if Chewie was on / died on the transport or that he still lived in another transport.

[@weslar7]

People who say stupid shit like “it’s a movie about space wizards, why do you care so much?” somehow don’t understand how much this franchise has meant to so many. Friendships built upon it, parents bonding with their kids, and people who the story really helped in times when they needed it. Even if it isn’t your thing, it was a big deal for many.

[@bipedleek241]

I’d bet that there’s a ton of fictional movies that they care deeply about

[@roycastanon5754]

An hour long video is stupid af and this guy is pathetic for making it. There’s tons of other videos on this which say the same thing but get the point faster. Pseudo intellectual vidoe

[@weslar7]

DayTripper He titles himself as “Professional Idiot” so I don’t think intellectual is the angle he is going for, and what is really pathetic is that there was more planning and care put into this video then the sequel trilogy as a whole.

[@SovereignStatesman]

Not to mention the fuss everyone makes about grown men playing with a ball... or a puck.

[@jankjaws9815]

DayTripper I think someone is just salty

[@guilhermesalomao7552]

I think after this trilogy no one will ever complain about the prequels anymore

[@Rebecca-oh5yh]

I will still complain about the prequels. But I respect the fact that Lucas had a story he wanted to tell, besides just earning more money.

[@dtrain9911]

No I will complain about the prequels I can’t sit threw them without getting bored like I never finish them anymore I liked the new trilogy I can’t ignore it had flaws but they were still good but that original trilogy is the best of the Star Wars trilogy

[@paulrasmussen8953]

@@dtrain9911 the prequels problem is writing the story line is fine

[@dtrain9911]

@@paulrasmussen8953 still doesn’t mean there good movies

[@paulrasmussen8953]

@@dtrain9911 they are flawed but not to the degree the sequel was

[@liquorlacker]

Lines that sum up the trilogies: Original Trilogy: "I am a Jedi, like my father before me." Prequel Trilogy: "Calm down Anakin." Sequel Trilogy: "A good question, for another time."

[@algovorus]

Prequel Trilogy: "I'm not the Jedi I should be."

[@traktor420]

The prequels for intellectuals: anakin, stop panakin, god has a planakin

[@fabienherry6690]

Original trilogy : "I'm a teen that want adventure but dady is a meany"

[@Сайтамен]

PT: You were my brother, Anakin, I loved you.

[@petercarioscia9189]

Sequels: "My powers have doubled since the last time we met, Count." Prequels: "Good, twice the pride, double the fall!"

[@jefjohn2008]

Adding in that DMX track (X Gone Gove It To Ya) at 50:00 was spot on and fit that part of your visor so perfectly 👏🏽👏🏽🔥🔥 R.I.P. DMX 🎤🖤

[@T1ANA6150]

Carrie Fisher did deserve better. The fact that her character, Princess Leia, didn't get a funeral as beautiful as Padme's funeral was in Revenge of the Sith is just upsetting.

[@bent8085]

They should’ve cut Chewie getting ‘killed’ and given that screen time to Leia’s funeral

[@TAEYYO]

Yeah she did deserve better. And while I enjoyed this video overall, there was nothing respectful or funny about saying she died from "loving cocaine a little too much". Turning her death into a punchline was in bad taste.

[@xMrNe0x]

@woooudo that's because starwars fans always have hope. Thats why we paying to see these shits and regret it afterwards lol

[@iridium5122]

She was a Jedi and disappeared like, Yoda, and Luke. It makes sense.

[@SovereignStatesman]

Well that was Padme's home planet, and Leia's was.... sorta blown up.

[@citogonzalez8177]

Rey: I’m a skywalker Fans: so it’s treason then

[@zacharycrook]

Oh, we're using "fake" names! 😅

[@zurdddtk3025]

@Mi Ke You mean Mary Sue*

[@hellol1023]

Why does she even think that her name is Rey Skywalker? It makes no sense

[@Treblaine]

How is she a Skywalker? She met one - once - bickered and argued with him for a weekend then left in frustration having learned and achieved NOTHING. If anything she's Rey Organa which is Princess Leia's surname and Leia practically adopted Rey.

[@sirinherrscherofvoid.chose2235]

Vorname _u Yeah, wait if she’s a Palpatine then how is she related to Skywalker besides Anakin being related to Palpatine by being his minion

[@desertfox738]

That whole “gotcha” segment was gold 😂

[@vanillajack5925]

10:50 I love the laugh track 😅

[@Nothing-ce8uv]

I lost it at 'mother fucker gonna get a space monkey'

[@autisticfrogza]

That's why "Gotcha!" Is entertaining.

[@SuperD00D]

He loves laser swords 😭😭😭 don’t forget your laser sword, laser swords are the most important thing, you get two of em now, two laser swords! Better than one! 😂 And this movie is about killing your grandpa lol that’s what’s important now

[@asherneyland8950]

@@vanillajack5925 look at his last Jedi video. Theres a gotcha bit on there

[@denistardif6650]

Yondu's death is something else "he might have been your father boy, but he wasn't your daddy" my dad died one year ago and I still can't watch that scene anymore.

[@leonhardable]

In the words of JRR Tolkien: Evil cannot create anything new, they can only corrupt and ruin what good forces have invented or made.

[@ntfoperative9432]

"Evil will always win, because good is dumb"

[@johnbarrientosiii6586]

That’s not a real quote you plebeian

[@leonhardable]

@@johnbarrientosiii6586 its not a citation, but tolkien wrote pretty much exactly that phrase in reference to sauron creating the orks by torturing and twisting elves. lemme look the exact wording up

[@leonhardable]

@@johnbarrientosiii6586 "The Shadow that bred them can only mock, it cannot make: not real new things of its own. I don't think it gave life to the Orcs, it only ruined them and twisted them; and if they are to live at all, they have to live like other living creatures." -Frodo, in The Return of The King, Chapter 11

[@johnbarrientosiii6586]

@@leonhardable that’s better

[@mogdogolog1030]

Hey Vito from what I heard from my little brother, Fortnight is the latest method for children to determine their position in the feudal hierachy that is the school playground. The children who have the newest and most expensive outfit in the game gain prominence and rise in power and influence while the poor kids who can only afford an outdated meme dance are castigated and shunned by their peers. I think some people play it as well not sure.

[@gamegalaxy765]

This is one of the best comments I've ever seen

[@rhysthegamer1039]

Fortnite is the game fortnight is 2weeks but yeah your right

[@RafaelLima-ce1rh]

Capitalism 101

[@theoutsider8745]

@@rhysthegamer1039 I'm pretty sure spelling it as 'fortnight' is part of the joke...

[@HolyknightVader999]

And the people behind Fortnite take advantage of it. Kids spend their parents' monthly earnings to get the latest outfits.

[@austintingles4639]

This is why I hate the sequels it’s to much Disney and less Star Wars

[@doot_slayer]

That’s honestly the best way to describe it imo.

[@Telodor]

Wasn't that exactly what we feared when they bought it? Although, mostly people thought it would be a musical xD Honestly, at this point I would have preferred a musical instead of this dumpster fire that we got.

[@thewizard7396]

Pretty much

[@MrTkillian]

To me the two best Disney Star Wars movies are Guardians of the Galaxy 1 & 2.

[@MPnoir]

So Smosh were right after all: kzbin.info/www/bejne/q4PJgKaiZdOGpMU

[@terminator6950]

“Star Wars is finally over”. 3 years. Disney Star Wars has now said three new movies have been basically pulled out of their asses, hoping who people don’t know that the last movies sucked, will watch it

[@meagronLP]

Anyone else denying that the sequels are canon but still frustrated and sad that we will never get better sequels to the skywalker saga?

[@Cruzly_xD]

I am too, but the force awakens has a good start off but then it all went to hell with the next two

[@MinuteLeech2]

Its called the Thrawn Trilogy. And Force Awakens sucked ass too, it was just a clone of ANH and it undid ROTJ's victory to rehash rebels vs Empire with Death Stars and no jedi

[@greyfinch2565]

@@Cruzly_xD Umm no 7 was trash. It didn't even have its own storyline. As soon as I realized I was watching a blatant rip off of 4, I knew the series was done.

[@AndreNitroX]

Read the Eu the sequels we deserve

[@greyfinch2565]

@Johnathon Davis Rouge One was actually really good and Solo wasn't bad either.

[@slashtitan1035]

I remember being so mad that Anakin didn’t actually appear in ROS or was even acknowledged in the Sequel Trilogy, but now looking back I’m glad he’s not associated with the Sequel Trilogy. They would have just ruined him like they did with the OT characters. Also it makes me even more excited to see him in the Kenobi series.

[@beetlejuicejr6133]

facts, cant wait aswell man!!

[@ekanshburhanpurkar1560]

By not having him in the sequels, they've ruined his entire character. Family was everything for Anakin

[@raafeyplayz7015]

Don’t get too hyped for the Kenobi Series. Kathleen Kennedy is part of it.

[@korrblank1361]

@@ekanshburhanpurkar1560 he’s dead, why would he be in the movie?

[@korrblank1361]

@@raafeyplayz7015 I’m sure it’ll be amazing, but there could’ve been more.

[@MrS-pe6sd]

Maybe this is a dumb question but, does Rey even know who Palpatine is?

[@negativeiqpoints396]

palpaatin coming back would be kinda like hitler rising from his grave

[@robertmack5425]

Snope

[@heAd3r]

considering she spent all her life on jakku, no she doesnt unless someone mentioned him after last jedi for some unknown reason, like why would you bring him up at all

[@MrTimPL]

Anakin when he saw that Rey buried his lightsaber in the SAND: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING

[@calvinmatthews1527]

When you realize Disney deserves ALL the hate it gets.

[@ElveeKaye]

I'm quite happy to watch Disney collapse in a heap of smoking ruins.

[@wasifiqbal9984]

Me: Ahh... let the hate flow through you!

[@Runmindor]

They did make CW season 7 and the Mandalorian, two of the most solid star wars productions so far imo, so I personally ignore the failure of the sequels just for that reason.

[@DrewPicklesTheDark]

Disney sold what little soul it had left around the turn of the Millennia when Roy Disney passed. Now it's just the usual corporate suspects running another corporation.

[@hehehehheheheh9127]

@@Runmindor Rogue One was rly good aswell

[@infinite_legend]

"AnD i aM aLL tHe JeDi" And "ReY sKyWAlkEr " Are the worst two lines in this movie. She didn't earn that name, she never even trained. She doesn't even deserve how OP they made her. She's literally the dumbest character with the worst progression in the history of mankind.

[@gasthemadsoviet4858]

They fly now??

[@chockyglocky0577]

GasTheMadSoviet They fly now

[@infinite_legend]

@@gasthemadsoviet4858 what's funny is John boyega (plays Finn) in an interview when asked about that line said that "they've been flying since the clone wars!" 😂

[@bent8085]

Anakin’s monologue about sand is less cringey. At least I laugh whenever he starts it. Rey saying she’s all the Jedi just makes a little part of me did inside

[@averagedepressionenjoyer8762]

You forget about Finn e.e He is the most dumb one

[@lostcosmonaut1000]

The movie could literally and quite ironically be called "Palpatine's Failed Abortion,"

[@ethanmcphee6263]

And it should be

[@mihailazar2487]

You mean unironically

[@lostcosmonaut1000]

@Grapthar's Hebrew Hammer yeah

[@mandelbro777]

an abortion is by definition a fail, so let's just call it Palpatine's Epic Abortion(squared symbol) it's at least a two dimensional abortion, perhaps cubic

[@kinagrill]

@Grapthar's Hebrew Hammer It should be the successful abortion... it killed the movie franchise. :p

[@hungtheheroluu]

Fun fact: on Wookieepedia, there's even a page for Mickey Mouse, who is established as a Jedi Master in the franchise. I didn't just pull something random out of the sarlacc pit-no joke, but he is ironically part of the Expanded Universe/Legends continuity (albeit non-canonically); the same continuity that Disney erased just to replace it with a terrible, nonsensical nightmare Luke just had in his sleep after a night of partying with the Ewoks on Endor.

[@guyinajar17]

I know i'm super late but I really want to share this. When I was 7 years old, I would come up with Star Wars scenarios in my head when I was bored. One time, my 7 year old mind was literally like "oh, what if the mega evil supreme dark embodiment of the Sith villain guy made an all attack with like a MILLION star destroyers. Oh, and what if each ship had a DEATH STAR RAY and the supreme OP super Jedi and the entire galaxy has to unite to stand a chance! That'd be epic!" A whole team of professional hollywood writers unironically thought of and used the same plot 7 year old me when he was bored, how do you mess up that badly?!

[@MariOmor1]

Your plot was better than what we got

[@UTU49]

@@MariOmor1 I literally think that a large percentage of fan fiction is far FAR better than Eps 8 and 9.

[@MariOmor1]

@@UTU49 amazing, everything you said was right

[@tulinfirenze1990]

Abrams subverted your adult expectations by giving you what the child version of you thought up.

[@coltonwhite2518]

The thing is that if the trilogy was actually set around this idea, it would've been at least enjoyable. The first movie sets the stage introducing our main characters and through their introductions we discover all the major factions at work in the Galaxy. Exposition works best when the audience learns with the protagonists since it helps form the basis for a connection between us. Fast forward a bit and we soon learn what these factions goals are and what motivates them, thus we now have a medium for our hero's goals and motivations. Mega evil supreme Sith embodiment of the dark side is building a fleet capable of destroying the Republic. OP Jedi backed by the Republic wants to stop him and preserve the balance Anakin died for and Luke continues to fight for. Rey, inspired by Anakin's sacrifice and Luke's determination, joins OP Jedi to help maintain the balance. Finn, already aware of the horrors of war and what the giga fleet is capable of, breaks his Indoctrination and defects learning what it means to truly fight for something *worth* fighting for. Perhaps even saving more of his brainwashed brethren to form a rogue squad to resist the Sith. And Poe, a cocky veteran yet ardent supporter of the Republic, bridges the gap between the two and must use his experience and charisma to help rally the Republic's military to fight. All this building up to the finale where Super evil bad guy deploys his fleet despite being delayed by our hero's actions throughout the trilogy, culminating in a massive clash where Rey and OP Jedi just barely manage to defeat the dark side, Finn's semi revolt frees countless stormtroopers, and Poe helps lead the Republic's combined forces to victory.

[@HouseholdHacker]

Thank you for this.

[@vito]

Give me a million of your subscribers

[@Matthew-Anthony]

@@vito I love your sense of humor. Your channel is criminally underrated.

[@flamingog6678]

@@vito sounds fair

[@StenBackstrom]

This review is so funny. And great. I watched it many times, even though it's an hour! Can't get enough of it. And it's so spot on. Amazing!

[@SirBlitzALot]

@@vito indeed

[@grantrockhold2478]

They also forgot that Korriban is the sith homeworld, and is even in cannon

[@yaruqadishi8326]

Screw it they strike that too like so many other out there today even outside the movie world.

[@yudhiadhyatmikosiswono9082]

Sad truth is Star Wars Expanded Universe are not considered canon by Disney and Kathleen Kennedy.

[@jojaham]

The jedi knew about korriban, so wouldn't be a great place for old palpi to hide. The way I see exegol is like dromund kas from legends. That's when I'm not trying to wipe the sequel trilogy from my mind.

[@FirstKingPotato]

@@yudhiadhyatmikosiswono9082 Korriban was in Clone Wars, meaning that it is canon.

[@MTrac-gm2nf]

Korriban was actually canonized in Clone Wars Season 6, and was still revealed to be the homeworld of the Sith. I guess Exogol is the private homeworld 😂