WATCH UNTIL END if your child is not sleeping through the night...

My toddler is still not sleeping through the night (and that's okay)
Go to thrivemarket.com/HeyShayla to get 30% off your first order + a free gift worth up to $60!
Do not come to me for sleep advice.... BUT if your child isn't sleeping through the night and YOU don't feel like it's a problem, I've got you.
We are told if your baby doesn't sleep through the night out the gate then you're doing something wrong, and I just don't believe that.There is so much noise on the other side of this topic. So many resources to teach you how to get your child to be independent, so when your baby isn't sleeping you're wondering what you're doing wrong.
I wanted to give a voice to the moms who think it's a problem because they've been told it is... not because THEY believe it is.
If this IS a problem for you, you're not getting sleep, you have multiples, your life is suffering, I cannot recommend Stephanie at Bedrocks Sleep www.bedrocksleep.com/ enough.You start with a free 15 min call to see if you align, and if you decide to hire her, she customizes a sleep plan for your personal needs.
However, if you're like me, you just needed someone to say... ITS OKAY to be there for your baby at night. Snuggle them, let them know you're there and trust your gut, Ma!
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00:00 My 18 month old isn't sleeping through the night
00:22 Hey Shayla Intro
00:38 Resources or Mindset Shift?
01:11 WE CAN'T BE 10 IN EVERY CATEGORY!!!
01:49 Snacks set to your house
02:31 Free Groceries!
03:12 Discount link for THrive Market
03:23 I sleep better with them in my bed
03:57 This is not sleep advice
04:08 Night Weaned to get period back
04:32 When my first started sleeping through the night
04:44 Night weaning my 2nd
05:05 We sleep trained my first
05:22 Then I changed my mind
05:37 I co sleep with both
05:47 IF YOUR BABY ISN"T SLEEPING THROUGH THE NIGHT
06:02 If we have a 3rd...
06:25 RESOURCE: SLEEP TRAIN
06:56 YOUR MINDSET SHIFT
07:47 Am I creating a needy baby?
08:35 If it's not a problem for you ITS NOT A PROBLEM
08:50 Cosleeping morning wakeups
09:23 This will no be forever

[@xoliswakali15]

I'm in South Africa, and it sounds hectic how babies are expected to be 'independent' in America... Babies just need us. Mostly because they really can't do much for themselves. And maybe they even enjoy just being around us.

[@nikkiwaltenburg4135]

My son will be 3 in Feb and we are still going strong with the night nursing 😅 Lord help me! " oh cool cool cool cool cool cool!! 😂 that made me laugh so hard.

[@alittlecupofmotherhood]

Love this. North American sleep culture puts so much pressure on moms. Go to Europe and life is so different and so much more accepting. Keep pushing out this content Shayla. 🙌

[@jivingdodo]

Agree. Although the UK is a bit the same, I read the title of this video and was confused as to why this was an issue. Of course they're not. They're 18 months old.

[@kayoss2306]

@@jivingdodo Yeah we really need to be more specific when we say "Europe". Europe is a very diverse place! Like Norway, Spain, UK, Poland? All have quite different cultural norms and attitudes to things.

[@MysteryExodus]

North American Sleep Culture lol

[@WithoutVlogs]

I live in the Netherlands and people started asking if our daughter was Sleeping trough The night from 4 weeks old. Now at 10 months, when I say she isn’t people Åre very surprised and start trying me to change to bottle feeding. Very strange what we grew to find “normal “

[@chantalgrauel]

@@WithoutVlogs Yes! I am Dutch, but living in Germany. I feel in Germany it is a little less, but in The Netherlands sleep is such a big topic. They best sleep right away in their own room and have to sleep through the night. I guess that is also because parental leave is so short (as in the USA), compared to for example Germany and some other European countries. From my Dutch family/friends I get asked much more often how the children are sleeping, if they sleep through the night (no) and that they should really get used to their own room, otherwise they will never (the oldest is 2 years and the baby almost 3 months). I do everything very intuitive and I feel I can be much more relaxed because of that. But it does make me a little mad when I get asked if my 1 week old baby is sleeping through the night, like no why would she?

[@EmilyElizabethMusic]

“Do what works until it doesn’t” has been my mantra through these past 5 years of motherhood, and truly it has saved me every time I second guess myself.

[@dawnforlife]

My girl woke multiple times to nurse alllll the way till she was 2+. I was a zombie for a while but now..she is 3 and stopped nursing, sleeps all night beside me.Honestly...I can't sleep without her now 😂😂😂 I am the one wanting to hug and snuggle and kiss and she'll be like "mama, too much." hahahahaha!

[@maeiris]

Do we live the same life?! Literally all your videos coincide perfectly with what the heck I’m going throughhhhh.

[@jenniferheller1453]

Mine has been sleeping on me with me since she was between 4 to 6 months old and she’s 22 months old now I love it but I also want my own space again

[@msbeautybubbles411]

I remeber hearing Gabor Mate on a podcast talking about how the most coddled infants turn into the most independent adults and that has stuck with me so hardcore. Your job as parents in the first couple years of life is to assure your baby that the world is a safe place and that is done by you responding to their needs and that includes at night! I was the person who had friends who's babies all slept through starting at like 2 months and I was like wtfffff why is this not happening. But it randomly did at 13 months. I have shifted my mindset to probably the first 18 months I won't get a solid night of sleep and that's ok that my babies need me.

[@Sam-qt5ff]

Love this! My almost 3 year old still doesn’t sleep through the night sometimes and same goes for my 6 yr old! In the middle of the night they crawl into bed with me like clock work! Little tricky with our 4 month old but I wouldn’t have it any other way. Our babies know they can be with us whenever they need. Cuddles and contact is more of a need than people realize in our western culture

[@GJess09]

I can’t tell you how much I needed someone to say this to me! Thank you. I will be playing on repeat😂 You are the best!

[@erin2702]

I was going to write this comment, but you did it for me!! ❤

[@kayoss2306]

Option 3 is to look at how much sleep your little one is getting over a 24 hour period and consider if it's too much for their individual sleep needs. Frequent waking can sometimes be a sign that the "sleep pressure" isn't high enough, either because they're getting more sleep than they need, or they're ready to reduce or drop a nap. Some kids just have lower sleep needs than average and/or are ready to drop naps sooner than you might think. I know so many parents that put their little ones to bed super early, but then complain that they wake up frequently or too early. Then people suggest night weaning or sleep training, before even considering if they're getting more sleep than they need! People even seem quicker to suggest "overtiredness" (which isn't a scientifically supported concept) than undertiredness. I think it's wild.

[@Dana-mb1hd]

Yes!!!! 💯

[@qpixelthree80]

But can’t frequent wake ups also be due to being overtired, I.e, not getting enough sleep in the 24 hours period/during naps. Also not to mention issues such as blocked nose/enlarged adenoids could also cause restless sleep.

[@rebeccazeman9309]

This! My son sleeps all night as long as our day schedule is good. He starts waking often if day schedule is off. He has dropped naps early. Been on 1 nap since 11 months. It's just what he needs and that's fine.

[@heyshayla]

Awesome thank you for this!!

[@kayoss2306]

@@qpixelthree80 yes, it's worth ruling out health issues. But no to "overtiredness". I realise this is a controversial thing to say, because it is so often spoken of in mainstream sleep advice, but overtiredness does not make sense based on everything we know about sleep science. If you've kept your kid up later than usual and they're unsettled in the night or taking longer to go to sleep, that's usually because they're overstimulated or emotionally dysregulated due to a change in their routine (e.g. they stayed up late for a family party, or they've been up watching screens). But "sleep breeds sleep" is a myth; we only need so many hours sleep per day and on no planet will sleeping more make your child need more sleep. Calm breeds calm though. Less overall sleep, or longer periods between sleep, allows chemicals to build up in the brain that signal need for sleep, resulting in deeper and longer stretches of sleep. Lots of parents don't want to hear that this may be the solution though, because they (understandably) want an evening off and their kids sleeping 7 til 7.

[@ThisFaithfulHome]

My year and a half old still wakes up at midnight and 4am and I’m perfectly ok with it! Even at 6 months prego I will still get up and attend to her every need!

[@pool8party]

My son didnt start sleeping through the night until 20 months. Then he hit the 2 year regression, but then he got consistent again. 9 times out of 10 he sleeps 9.5 hours a night with a 2.5 hour nap during the day.

[@Kcorra]

THANK YOU FOR THIS VIDEO! signed, a single mom of the best 9 month who swore she'd never cosleep but now has the world's worst sleeper

[@laralabronbaldwin]

My just turned 4 year old still doesn’t sleep through the night also 🙃 it’s not fun! But I’m used to it. Now I have a 7 month old as well, and so trying to get them both to sleep in their own beds for majority of the night so I can get some sleep. Bed shared with my first, but my second is noisy, and I feel like I’m ‘on alert’ all night when she’s next to me now so transitioned her to her cot, which is a pain for me as 2-3 times a night I have to go and sit in the rocker and nurse her, but at least I then sleep between those blocks. ❤

[@vdiazda]

I don’t really agree with the co-sleeping philosophy because just because your baby wants something doesn’t mean you give them whatever it is (ie being at their call all night), but I appreciate hearing a different opinion than mine. You do you, girl. But parents who let their kid cry some and fall back asleep on their own aren’t doing a bad job either. Not saying you’re necessarily saying that, but putting that out there for other parents like me ❤.

[@heyshayla]

I appreciate this opposite opinion in a compassionate approach! And totally agree!! Everyone’s situation is different and we are all doing the best we can!

[@user-jh5ll3ex4f]

I agree- we did cosleeping very rarely at the beginning when they needed to be consoled- teething, sick etc … but honestly after a few days of waiting only 5 minutes of crying until they self soothe- baby is now able to sleep on his own, 12 hours straight. I cannot recommend this method enough- my bed, my room and my relationship with my husband is ours again ❤ and baby is sleeping soundly 😊

[@user-jh5ll3ex4f]

But I will say- we did the sleep training early- around 6 weeks… and it worked so quickly- waiting too late could be longer than just a few days…. We have friends that have a 7 and 5 year old that still sleep in their parents bed…this alone was motivation to not continue with the co sleep train lol

[@laralabronbaldwin]

If my 4 year old is in my bed she won’t wake at all, even if the baby cries next to her. But with my second she just seems to like her own space, and sleeps better without the noise or movement of others in the bed. So fascinating how they can be different

[@robiniapseudoacacia3]

This is so good. I co-sleep with both of my kids and yes. Babies need you to feel safe.

[@austynneblaine805]

My 8 m.o. is still waking up for breast feedings 2-3 times at night. 😅 "it's the hard I choose" is how I look at it. But when people ask me and I tell them this is our schedule , they immediately want to offer advice as if something is broken. I get confused on how to feel because yes, I haven't had a full night's rest in 8 months .. but I also agree with what your saying , this is my job to make her feel secure and I feel lucky to be able to breast feed. I guess this is life for now and I know I'll miss it when she gets older !

[@DanceAddikt]

That’s totally biologically normal! You’re going an amazing job ❤ my 14mo has just started sleeping through the night a few times a week, but most nights she still wakes once to feed.

[@leahbradley403]

14 month old not sleeping thru the night yet 🙋‍♀️ she usually wakes around 3 then comes into bed with us. It takes a little for her to settle but we love the cuddles and she needs us! I do let my eyes wander sometimes and question why it feels like all my friends babies sleep perfectly but guess what? That’s not my baby, and it won’t be forever, and I love her 🥰 small problems!!

[@faithtyrrell244]

Almost 9 month old baby here, still not sleeping through the night. I know its a season and it passes quickly. Thanks for making us Mama's feel less crazy.

[@amystaahs2118]

My baby sleeps through the night most nights. Every once in a while he might cry and I would just go in and rock him to sleep--sometimes it might be once or sometimes it might be multiple times. I have found that if he had a busy day with a lot of people and/or other kids then he is more likely to wake up in the night. It's just that point we're at in development. Like Shayla said, it won't last forever and he's just needs his mom sometimes. It's a little rough if I am quite tired or have a big day the next day but sometimes I remind myself to cherish these moments with him--holding him in my arms while he falls back asleep because there will come a time when I cannot do that anymore when he gets older/bigger and I will miss those moments.

[@xdarkswanwaterx]

Everyone's definition of "sleeping through the night" is different too. Our 2 year old has his own room. I know he wakes up sometimes in the middle of the night because sometimes we'll hear a "mama" from his room, but then he goes back to sleep on his own. I consider that sleeping through the night! Sometimes he wakes up at 5:30 and just chats to himself in his crib for an hour while we lie in our room and listen. I don't nurse him, so he doesn't go back to sleep. If he was in our bed, maybe I would notice those middle of the night wake-ups more and would consider him to not sleep through the night. :)

[@Ariadnethedreamer]

THANK YOU! All the moms in my life have unicorns that sleep through the night from 8 weeks and my 13 month old is still up 3-4 times a night.

[@kaiyaanniescott]

My eldest didn't sleep through until 21months when I brought his newborn sister home. She's now 11months and doesn't sleep through x

[@nicolesmith1267]

My almost 4 year old still crys out for me in the night sometimes and i go to him and i also lie with him until he falls asleep and whats funny is i sleep trained him at 4 months old and he was a completely independent sleeper as a baby lol i think its natural for most toddlers to do that. Commenting only to encourage that there is no such thing as normal. My 17 month old still wakes up for a bottle in the night too, i decided just to be fine with it because i stressed so much about it with my son and then one day he just dropped the bottle

[@kiksocks12]

Feel this so much, I’ve had a similar line of thought recently, my 18 mo old is very similar. I also want to reiterate the point that all babies are different! As a ftm for some reason this point was news to me (lol) when it seemed like my kid wasn’t doing things the same way other kids would. I have a friend whose baby just started sleeping through at 11 weeks. They didn’t do anything she just did it on her own (congrats to them) my toddler still fights sleep and needs all the things to help him power down at the end of the day. They’re just different and it’s ok!!

[@kathleenhochstatter822]

Love this. Important message for parents to hear.

[@anhe3409]

Exactly! Same here in France. So happy to hear that. It is just fine and it’ll come little by little. Babies are not machines to program, sleep will come with the time. Sometimes I hate it, sometimes it’s just fine.

[@emilyhughes4099]

Your posts have been so on time for me recently. Thank you for doing what you do!

[@MariaRose360]

I want to say straight away, your hair looks gorgeous in this video! ❤

[@heyshayla]

Thank you!!!! It’s day after family pics hair🙌😂

[@juliedoherty6894]

Loved this video!!! My 18th month old co sleeping breastfeeding baby wakes constantly throughout the night. I’ve accepted it. She’s my second. 3 year old sister also co sleeps. Only starting sleeping through the night after I weaned her a few months ago. Laughing when you said about the toddler waking. Why do they have the LOUDEST WHISPER!!! 😂😂 I hand her my phone to watch Disney until baby wakes so I get few more mins. Win win 🎉

[@Nononooooooooooope]

I am with you on this through and through lol we are in the exact same sleeping situation. Thank you for putting this out there for moms who need to hear.

[@karolinas6735]

Thank you for reassuring me, I needed to hear that 😊

[@klaudiadrozdowska3438]

We’ve been coo-sleeping with my two children : 2,5 year and 9 month old. It was working for some time, until baby started kicking me and waking me up just to play, not to nurse. I did sleep training for baby and it worked, but to do it the baby is not sleeping with me and I don’t nurse him at night. It was the best decision I have made, I wish I did it with my first, he wasn’t sleeping through the night until he was around 2 😢 I was so tired all the time I don’t know how I did it all 😂

[@mattmelissamcclelland3876]

Thank you SO much for that! I needed that today!

[@nicolegerard2907]

Mom of two and totally back this❤❤!! 💯 Agreed!

[@juliadd]

You can be responsive to your babies and toddlers without bedsharing and nursing on demand. You don't have to sleep train if you don't want to and can still make changes if things aren't working for you. It's definitely the harder option, but as someone who is committed to not sleep training, this nuanced space was important to me and I wish I had known there were more than two options as a first time parent. Also things can totally depend on what kind of temperament you child has.

[@heyshayla]

Id loooooooove to know more!!!

[@dawnforlife]

Yes..please share more! I am committed to not sleep training..I almost died but didn't hahaha! In case, I have another..I'd love to know more. However, i don't want anything harder than nursing and going back to sleep 😆

[@moonmom351]

I don't want to look for other ways, I felt exhausted looking for ways to change things, neither I haven't accepted the way it is now, I just try to be present and see my pain (it's so damn hard) 😭 My 11 months old baby changed her sleep pattern around 7 months old, nursing throughout the night for all this time, I'm almost ready to schedule an appointment with a psychiatrist. I feel ill and it is really hard to have a "good day". Still committed to not sleeping training. I'm trying to do what comes naturally to us with less internet search for solutions.

[@juliadd]

⁠​⁠@@moonmom351it is SO hard and accessing professional help makes so much sense, especially if you’re not having any “good days”. I wonder if you have anyone you can lean on to help you get more rest? Sometimes it’s not the reality for people, which is also very very hard. Sending you support and strength. I know what it’s like to be frustrated by internet searches and trying to figure out what works for you 💜

[@bernicescheffler8421]

I needed to hear this ❤ thank you for being the voice for me.

[@Bedrockssleep]

Love this! And thanks for the Shout Out! You know I agree with you! It's not a problem if it's not a problem for you!

[@xXCourtneyLee13Xx]

Neither one of my kids slept through the night until after they turned two. My son is 2.5 and he still gets up to get something to drink sometimes. I’ve started fixing a cup and leaving it on the lowest shelf in the fridge. I hear him get up, grab his cup, shut the fridge and go back to sleep. My pediatrician said it’s perfectly normal for some kids to not sleep through the night because we as adults don’t always sleep through the night. Blew my mind when she said that. I also co slept both kids until they were six months old. My daughter would come get in the bed with us super early in the morning until it was time to get up. My son will not get in bed with us. He brings his blanket and lays down in our doorway and waits until my alarm goes off. Each kid is different ❤

[@amandasantos8527]

😂 I have an almost 3 YO. 2 years and 10 month old to be exact and she is not sleeping through the night. Not fun but there is not a lot you can do about it besides love and patience, so much patience is needed.

[@maiaatkinsschalchlin2075]

Thanks for this video! My 18 m/o doesn't sleep through the night either and everyone is giving me grief because they think she should be sleeping on her own. Thank you for being a voice of reason! ❤

[@dawnforlife]

Ahhh I feel you! Hang in there mama! Mine is now 3 and she sleeps through the night. Didn't happen till 2.5. You will sleep through the night again, promise!

[@danielleresar5755]

Yesss people look at me like I have two heads sometimes. Like its a foreign thing that my baby is not sleeping great.

[@emilyalbert7910]

My husband thinks that our 2 year olds sleep is awful because she comes to bed with us at some point every night and sometimes wakes up a couple times beyond that. She has never once slept through the whole night. As much as I would love for her to sleep in her bed all night, I’m still enjoying the co-sleeping and being able to comfort her when she wakes up.

[@JeCar17]

💯 thank you soooooo much! I know that you're told this all the time but I just really needed to hear this. You're right in that I'm surrounded by people that don't understand why I'm struggling. They didn't have this problem and according to them I'm perpetuating my own struggles. Thank you for the support! I'll watch this a couple more times to remind myself.

[@lisak574]

Hello 👋👋 my two year old still wakes up in the night, not every night, but some nights. On top of that he likes to wake up at 4am ish, have some nursing time and fall back asleep for another hour or so. At first I felt so angry about it, and I'd get so frustrated. Until I decided to try and look at things differently, these wake ups give me extra cuddle time with my sweet little boy (he sleeps on a floor bed). Some day he's going to be a big boy and not want those snuggles anymore. I'm making the most of it. Accepting your situation is sometimes the best medicine.

[@emilystrukoff7545]

It's such a relief to read about other people following their instincts and going through the same thing! And that it ends up working out, with a confident child that trusts you and also doesn't need to nurse at night. Just hearing from you that you coslept with a baby and toddler was enough for me know that it will be okay when baby comes in a couple weeks and will likely share a bed with me and my 2.5 year old. I'm grateful that you share this perspective because you are the only one I've seen saying this.

[@carinen8119]

Yes to encouraging parents to feel confident in making the right choice for their families (whatever that choice may be) ! Wondering what I was doing wrong or why I was exhausted all the time took so much energy in the early days. Getting confident that every baby is different was really helpful. I like the example of a friend with twins: one of them started sleeping through at only a few months, while the other one woke up neediness a parent often for much longer. They were raised the same, but were just different babies.

[@emmasilmaro277]

Thanks Shayla. Needed to hear this after another rough night with my 12 month old 😢

[@Love-144]

I needed this! My 3 year old and 15 month and I’m the only one with kids that didn’t and don’t sleep well and I cosleep and nurse on demand

[@MayanPrincess3]

Thank you for thiiiiisss!!!!

[@leydyl1009]

Thanks for this video. My girl is 15 months, we co sleep and nurse on demand.

[@Katasia71]

You are just the best! It is always so good to hear your perspective because it is so close to what I feel and I’m trying to follow my instincts (however I feel like everyone around is against or just doing stuff differently but I’m the freaky one). Anyway, for that reason- just thank you for being here ❤️

[@angelarose7925]

Thank you for sharing this!! I literally cannot talk about my struggles of my toddler still sleeping with us with most moms because they just say I need to do cry it out sleep train, I personally don't believe in that so I have no one to talk to about this. Even after I night weaned, he still was hungry and drank pouches through the night. He's 2.5 and still does so idk I really would like him to sleep through the night. Sometimes I think I want him out of our room but then if he is I'm anxious and can't go to sleep because he's not with me so I do think I like it better. There's just parts of me that wishes I could get a break from my kid every night like most moms.

[@heyshayla]

I relate 100000%

[@emilyelguera3316]

This is exactly how I parent too. Everyone has had an opinion about it and I’m so happy I have just gone with what I felt my baby needed. Thank you for this!!

[@KatieJane31]

When I had my third, both big brother and sister slept on mattresses on my floor cause they were having trouble sleeping with the change of having a new sibling. Baby is 9 months old now and both siblings are recently back in their room with no issues. Go with the flow and do whatever works for your family!

[@heyshayla]

Love this!!!!

[@OverallBabyVideos]

AMEN MAMA!!

[@mangolorianmother]

Im so so happy that I found your content almost few years ago ❤ you voice out so perfectly what I feel about my “needy” baby 😅 Lots of love for you! Ah, and have to add - Im from Europe, and here we also get lots of that baby sleep and independence nonsence put on mamas that just wants to be here for the baby 😢

[@elvirazeb4113]

My child is 40 months (😆) and doesn’t really sleep through the night 😅next year she will move in her big girl room and then we will try to sleep train. I don’t really mind having her in our bed, More so I get anxious when she’s not. But I feel like sleep could be better for all of us, when we are not interrupting each other

[@user-mv7zc7um1o]

I love this I can relate so much thank u

[@mollie1999]

Thank you so much for this. It's reassuring to know that it's normal for babies to not sleep through the night until much later. My kiddo went through nearly constant sleep regressions from 4-7 months. We only just got him back to a manageable 2-3 wake-ups per night and he's 7.5 months. He was waking up like 6 times a night for the last 3 months. Absolutely killer for me. On the up side, I've improved my homebrew coffee game 😅

[@sarahalily8811]

Thank you for your video

[@musicandsport]

Love this!

[@jinxforce]

Thanks!! Just wanted to share my anecdote that I remember waking up in the middle of the night regularly and calling for my parents, up until at least 9 years old (sorry parents!!) Eventually, I stopped and was able to sleep like a rock...until pregnancy. Now with my own 18mo who doesn't sleep through the night, I try to keep this in perspective 😅

[@drishticommunitywellness]

I love you! You are my best mom friend! Hahaha. Bodhi is 11 months old and wakes up every hour. It used to be every two, but for months every hour. We nurse to sleep or rock to sleep that takes forever! He sleeps in a cosleeper next to the bed. And yes, we are their safety, I feel the same. Funny that we would birth an adult with a fully developed brain, which we know isn’t true. 😂

[@jordan-evacavanagh2892]

Here in the UK, the pressure is exactly the same as the US. The expectation that baby should be sleeping through the night by 6 weeks. The question that makes me CRINGE - "is he a good baby? Does he sleep though?". WTF?! Is any baby a "good" or "bad" one?! And is this just in terms of sleep or is there a checklist that determines if I have a good or bad baby? Utterly ridiculous. What stuck with me from your video, which I haven't ever heard or been told before... "you CAN change your mind!". This has never even felt like an option for me. It hasn't even crossed my mind. If I make an informed decision, I feel like it HAS to work or I have failed my child. So if something just doesn't suit us/doesn't work out as expected, I feel shame and guilt. You've made me feel like I can actually just say, "you know what, this isn't working like I thought it would," without judgement. Thanks again for another great video! Xx

[@heyshayla]

👏👏👏👏 yay!!

[@breestep9591]

We can do hard things!!!

[@maritzah.4039]

Oh my goodness thank you for this!! I’m a new mom now and you’ve encouraged me through my pregnancy and into motherhood! As far as sleeping goes, I try to put my 2 month old to sleep in his bassinet for bedtime so that I can have some alone time with my husband (it’s a hit or miss, but sometimes we’re able to have time together while he is sleeping), then when he wakes up I will bring him into bed with me and I love it because of the bond and ease that it gives for breastfeeding. Not to mention I get more sleep! Before co-sleeping, I sometimes only got 1 hour of sleep the whole night and on good nights on average about 3-4 hours a night overall and I felt like that just wasn’t sustainable. Biologically it didn’t make sense to me either. In 2 months my son will be starting full-time day care and I feel like co-sleeping will help me get enough sleep each night to work full-time each day (especially when the 4 month sleep regression hits). I also think it will give me and my son the time we need together that we will start to miss out on when I have to go back to work. Thank you so much for being so open about your co-sleeping journey! You’re definitely someone who inspires me to not take things so seriously and to enjoy the journey ❤️ God bless you & your family ❤️

[@sallypalmer1616]

We are also co-sleeping with both kids. My son is two 1/4 and my daughter is 5month. My husband wakes up at 6 in the morning and makes himself ready for the day. Then he picks up my son, who is still half asleep and does the morning routine with him in another room. Then he brings him to daycare. Everything so I can get some extra hours of sleep with my daughter, who of course is breastfeeding multiple times at night. We usually sleep till 7:30. Ah, yes and my son has been sleeping through the night with 22 month... 1 month before my daughter was born. Lucky me, I just have one kid waking up at night 😀

[@danielleresar5755]

Mine is 18 months and also not sleeping through the night! I’m with ya :) They are only little for so long. Floor bed in her own room and I just go in nurse her until she falls back asleep. Getting close to night weaning. Dreading it 🥺🤞🏼

[@katieknapp8729]

Yes! We did sleep training at 6 months but I always respond when she needs me in the night. And it's because she NEEDS me! And that's okay.

[@heyshayla]

👏👏👏👏👏 love this

[@rebeccazeman9309]

That's what I did too! I sleep trained so my son could fall asleep on his own but I never sleep trained night wakes. I respond every time. He only cries out if he is sick or needs me for something.

[@user-bz6dd9us7k]

Love this❤

[@NicoLauren3]

Thank you so much for this. ❤❤❤ I am a first time mom and my little guy is almost 14 months. Still wakes up a couple times for bottle. It really doesn’t bother me that much and sometimes he sleeps 6+ hour stretches so I figure he will figure it out at some point. When I compare myself to others, I feel bad about it. This video is giving me permission to not give any more **cks about it. 😂

[@meganunthank778]

Thank you for this. 2 year old that has slept through the night only a handful of times - and the majority of those were when he was with my mom or mother-in-law. My MIL literally said to me “Maybe you’re the problem.” I know she’s super naive and doesn’t get how that came off, but I’m still super hurt over it almost a year later

[@heyshayla]

Woof no kidding what a comment 😵‍💫

[@IlluminosaImmortalis]

THANK YOU!!!!!! My 15 month old is waking up for two hours and fighting sleep once a night for past few nights. Heard that it could be reverse cycling?? Have not felt comfortable sharing this with many moms because I have recieved SO much judgement. Thank you so much for helping in this way.

[@heyshayla]

I’ve found stuff like that is usually a phase! But it feels like it forever 😵‍💫😂

[@yanka1650]

I love you!

[@SophiaTallulah]

20 month old not sleeping through 😵‍💫 co sleeping and breast feeding. He’s a happy chap though ❤

[@RobertaStonequist]

confidence gained.

[@xenos911]

You’re gorgeous

[@incaray69]

My 5 Yr old still wakes most nights! She does sleep through the night sometimes. We coslept until she was nearly 5. Then managed to slowly get her in her own room. She would wake most nights 3 /4 times. We eventually got her petty much sleeping through in her own room. Just in time for my son being born...now her bed is pushed next to mine 🙃🙃🙃 She was waking every hour and feck it...we needed sleep! Now we all get sleep! Well everyone except me! 😂

[@sl7756]

Thank you ❤ What kind of light do you use for nightweaning that switches from red to green?? Want to start soon and that sounds so helpful

[@heyshayla]

Hatch! And they’re having a black Friday sale so now is the time!

[@AlauraJones]

Bro, my two year-old was not sleeping through the night because she is teething again. And after a week of this, I’m like, Ok girl we are going to sleep tonight! This is what we did: We bundled up and went outside to play for 30 minutes even though it was rainy. We had a big pasta dinner, and I just kept feeding her little snacks afterwards. Which took a lot of diligence, love and encouragement, because teething babies absolutely do not want to eat haha It also helps to feed them and get them juice at the beginning of their wake window so that it’s completely digested by the time they take their nap or go to sleep, and that way their body doesn’t have to work on digesting it and the sugar doesn’t keep them up. We played a bunch of games that got her thinking and her mind working. Like her a little board game that teaches how to open locks and putting blocks in buckets etc. Then we went and took a bath with three drops of doTERRA lavender oil FOR BABIES and I used the baby Rescuer rollerball from doTERRA on her jaw line. Great baby shower gift when I remember that we have it! Normally I don’t let her stay in too long because I don’t want her tummy to get that empty seasick feeling, but because she had enough to eat at the beginning of her wake window so I let her play a little extra. I also like to let her chew on frozen milk rubberbanded up tight in a wet washcloth in the bath, and she absolutely loves it. When we got out I made sure her ears were dry with baby qtips and put unscented lotion on her face and baby lotion on her body and then we did a full body massage with the baby lavender massage oil, which I always forget we have from when she had colic. Then put her in warm pajamas, that are super soft inside. I let choose which songs to sing while brushing her teeth, she chose brown bear. 😂 And we gave her a little bit of baby ibuprofen. Its good to get the kind that doesn’t have HFCS or red dye 40. And some gum soothing gel on her teeth. Then my husband read her a stack of books before bedtime and sang her to sleep as usual. And I try to keep the hatch sound machine as quiet as possible, at vol. 12 and I didn’t change that, but I put a fan blowing outside her room so she didn’t get cold, but had something extra to cover up us watching a movie 😂 And when I tell you she slept through the night! She slept in the next morning even and she didn’t even wake up for her midnight diaper change. It was incredible. I got to sleep through the night, but also double happy to know that she was resting well and her teeth weren’t keeping her up. ❤️

[@AlauraJones]

I just realized that that comment makes me sound moderately bougie, but the sleep tips are from the Baby Wise book and we were a having a spa day haha Because I know if I was trying to push molars through my gums I would definitely need a spa day. 🤣

[@heyshayla]

👏👏👏👏

[@AlauraJones]

@@heyshayla Gasp! This reply made my day! So thankful for all the pregnancy and parenting tips from your videos! 🥰

[@graceelizabeth8788]

My tod is 14 months old. He has been “sleep trained” since 7 months. He still wakes up every night and cries. I don’t go get him, he just eventually goes back to sleep.

[@lianashiveley1672]

I feel seen 🎉

[@Almira524]

I have two girls who are 26 months apart. I co-slept with them both when my second was born because we moves and we could have a floor bed and have two beds pushed together to give the whole family comfortable space. (My first is a wild sleeper so that made co-sleeping difficult/uncomfortable for us initially). My second didn’t start sleeping through the night till after she turned 2, I didn’t wean her till she was about 27 months old and pregnant with my third (night weaned at 19 month for dental reasons). I wanted a 3ish year age gap between #2 and #3 as well because it’s just a lot, I do a lot of the same stuff you do. I put the girls in their own bedroom and started out sleeping in there with them and slowly transitioned to sleeping in my own bedroom (like 2 months before baby was due 😅) my second still wakes at night sometimes but it has worked out and I am able to co sleep with the baby. The girls each have a bed but they sleep together in one. Just wanted to share since you are thinking about a possible third baby. If I was still in my previous house and we had bigger rooms I’d still totally co sleep with all of them. We had a queen and king on the floor and the family bed worked out well for us. We just can’t do that or have the beds on the floor at our current house 😩

[@heyshayla]

I needed this. I’ve literally been thinking there’s no way I can do a third mostly bc of how intense we do things

[@moonmom351]

I don't know what's harder pushing the baby out or dealing with all the judgmental people talking about my child's development process. I will move to Mars and come back when she is 18.

[@heyshayla]

😂😂👏👏

[@VeronicaPash]

Omg we’re struggling with our 12 month old ! I need some help

[@hannahliddle2785]

It’s so exhausting but I am happy to be there to comfort my baby when she needs me in the night. When people say it’s a bad habit to go to your baby when they call out in the night because they will learn that you’ll come and expect it….. guess what- I want her to know that I’ll always be there when she asks for me❤️

[@melissarevelez3691]

Thanks for adding a voice that normalizes babies needing care and attachment no matter the time of day! I do have a sleep question though... do you know anything/have advice about the 3-4am wiggles? (I'm making up this term.) Basically, my baby's asleep but very restless at this time every single morning, and will only stop wiggling around if she's completely upright on my chest. I'm assuming she's not the only one. I heard it might be related to digestion turning on more at that time. I could use some perspective shifting around that because I can't sleep sitting up like that, so I get very frustrated.

[@heyshayla]

I don’t have any advice just what we’ve done. I used to give aj a squeezer or apple sauce pouch at that time. She’d eat it and go back to sleep. My little one nurses and goes back to sleep. When aj was little she did the same thing and had to be ON me. Might just be a thing of trying someone else during that time, might be terrible for a couple days but they’ll get the new routine. Maybe try on a day your partner can wake up with them when they actually wake up at 6 or 7 or whatever. Again I’m not the one to ask for sleep advice lol @bedrocksleep on ig does free question Fridays! You could ask her!

[@beckybrewer2546]

Anyone else watching this at 3am as their toddler screams for the breast but your 35 weeks pregnant with twins and you just can’t 🥴

[@brianrounding4258]

Am I understanding this correctly ?......your research and techniques didnt work too well in the past?

[@KARDAYAHSSoulServices]

Your baby washed up! 😮😂🧡💚