We Messed Up | Chosen Family Podcast

[@JanneBernards]

Mak: "I don't think I'm autistic." Also Mak: "My birthday is going to throw off my schedule."

[@raylynmaeray]

🤣 yesss

[@ttarotkidd]

this made me laugh too 🤣🤣

[@helenogrady4544]

Haha I had this thought too

[@PawsitivelyQuestionable]

The mortified silence after "its my birthday" and the steadily growing horror after Mak pulled out each birthday accoutrement was the funniest thing I've seen all year 😂

[@schoolfreak32]

When Mom and Dad forget their own Baby's birthday...

[@sarser8089]

Haha so true. Im just sad there's no "stupid stupid stupid" this time xD

[@ironiceilidh]

accoutrement!!! what a great word!

[@mrjr03]

Omg lmao 💀

[@raven_moonshine39]

Ashley and Alayna competing to prove who loves Mak more might be the best divorced parents bit we've gotten so far on this podcast Also, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAK!!! 🥳🥳🥳

[@gunselshaly537]

Forgetting your kids birthday is a very divorcee thing to do as well

[@circleofleaves2676]

I'm Autistic and the term is "traits" rather than "symptoms". I was formally diagnosed at age 36 which is typical for women or anyone growing up socialised as women. A formal diagnosis can be helpful if you genuinely need accommodations around work, school, university, etc. Either an informal (self-recognising only) or formal diagnosis is useful to help give you context around the way you experience the world, to help find resources (including just short educational videos from other autistic folks on youtube) around strategies for executive dysfunction etc, and permission (rather than suppressing) to recognise that stimming, for example, is an important self-regulatory tool. It can give you the terms and language you need to express your feelings, needs and boundaries to other people. You can cut yourself some slack around the things you can't change, stop wondering why certain advice that makes other people thrive just doesn't work for you (and understand why), and instead get on with modifying and adapting ways of doing things that actually work for you. One good example is understanding just why CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) really doesn't work for most autistic people, and absolutely stay the hell away from ABA (Applied Behavioural Analysis, basically gay conversion therapy equivalent but for autistic people). A formal diagnosis can also add a touch of "validity" when dealing with others. For example, if I go to see a new doctor/specialist, at the start of the appointment I tell them "I'm Autistic, so if you see me looking away when you're talking to me, I definitely AM listening, it's just easier for me to process information that way". They usually don't ask if that's a formal diagnosis, but if they do, I can say yes, and bypass any doubts they have which could extend to them wondering if perhaps anything else on my medical list is also self-diagnosed. Also realise that the term "spectrum", when it comes to autism, is not linear. It doesn't necessarily mean mild, moderate, severe. If you've ever seen an astrology birth chat (I know, so gay) it looks a little more like that. For example, sensory issues might be a massive thing for you, but eye contact not so much, and all depending on other factors. We've moved on from the "linear spectrum" to more of a "wheel" or "pie chart". You can find visual examples of them online if you're interested.

[@zazajf]

This was a GREAT explanation, thanks!

[@stephben8042]

Very well said

[@TaylorWelborn-ce1nd]

wait i have just started to unmask and getting tested for ASD (though self-diagnosed already). and i have been feeling like CBT therapy hasn’t been effective lately but i could figure out why. it helped with my anxiety & depression, but now i just feel frustrated. can you expand on why you’ve heard that??

[@vallentinac9513]

THANK YOU

[@LyndzMae]

I'm self diagnosed, kind of. My therapist brought it up first, but she's not qualified to do the actual diagnosis and I can't afford the doctor who does. The biggest thing for me has been the self compassion. I've spent my whole life wondering what is wrong with me. Knowing I'm autistic has helped me understand why I am the way I am. I'm not lazy, I get burnt out and need recovery time! It's made a massive difference for me!

[@Princess_0f_Trees]

Fun Facts about Autism Diagnosis: in the US it costs about $1,500 to take the test. And if given a formal diagnosis you don’t get much other than the ability to say you have it. But also, will then be less able to qualify and be approved for a loan, or for adoption. And you are then more likely to have your child taken from you by social services. AND you can pay that $1,500 and clearly qualify for the diagnosis and be denied it anyway, if the person giving it decides not to give it. For whatever reason. Reasons have included the person saying they volunteer for causes they care about, having made direct eye contact, wearing makeup, and wearing clothes that are clean and washed. Self diagnosis is valid, accepted in the Autism community, and saves lives.❤

[@Princess_0f_Trees]

Unfortunately, a formal diagnosis for SOME people, causes more problems than it solves.

[@cowboylikepaisley]

This!! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 I understand why people don’t love self diagnosis, but in the autism community it is necessary. And anyone who is a self diagnosed autistic did not take one test or hear one thing they resonated with and diagnose- they probably took every test out there several times over and could list you all the criteria and how they fit it lol

[@Mariethechaotic]

Yes! I still am hesitant to call myself autistic even though I've believed it for over a year and have genetic reasons (I'm adhd already, so is my sister brother, likely dad and Gran's a too and my niece and son are autistic, thus higher likelihood I'm right about myself) outside of my autistic traits because I know so many people's reactions to a self-diagnosis is an eye roll. And the amount of time I've spent watching videos or literally reading the diagnostic manual pages on ADHD and autism to try and understand what the overlaps are because so many autistic traits could be explained by ADHD or, more often, relatable part of the time until the ADHD side kicks in to fuck shit up.

[@emmaakamemma]

Folten's FULL asshole getting into shot as Ashley says the word "undatable" is peak comedic timing. Ashley, you raised him right!

[@yeahokay...actuallynah]

it's called fashion💅 then Ashley pulls out the Mak hat and takes it to another level

[@JuMixBoox]

When I imagine someone saying "She's out of my league", I immediately think she's an established lawyer, has a career, a home, her life in order. She's a boss and confident and can handle situations thrown at her with ease. That includes that she takes care of her looks to a degree, but I think that's an aspect that's lower down on the list and below things like finances. But I think maybe the "out of someone's league" thing just reflects what you feel insecure about or lacking in about yourself that you then get impressed by sometime else having.

[@bruadarach9758]

This is such a good distillation of the exact feeling… Also that idea of taking care of their looks is so true, someone who looks like they’re presenting *exactly* how they want to, are basically immaculate in every way, and noticeably confident, assured, and at peace with themselves because of it

[@KalhyceK]

"Get firm Mak!" was the most hilarious thing, particularly after Ashley's bit.😂😂😂

[@albertqhumperdinck]

"Yeah, but you could've written it like an acrostic poem!"

[@charlotteclarke2191]

I am autistic and an autism researcher and what I find is people who are Autistic or ADHD or simply neurodiverse they aren't asking to be excused they/we are asking to be understood. Excuse and explanation are two separate things and those that often use the label in the moment as Ashley says, or use the language to answer for their behaviour are simply not taking responsibility for such behaviours. They're wanting to be excused. As neurodiverse people, we also have to take responsibility for our behaviour, this is part of adult life, however we often gain the diagnosis or tell someone about our diagnosis as a means of explaining that our behaviour often isn't within our means to control or 'mask'. Most likely, were already masking as much as we can and if then we still appear 'odd', this can be explained by our diagnosis as opposed to any desire for our behaviour to be excused. Explanation over Excuse is usually how you can tell people who are genuinely on the spectrum as opposed to people using labels as excuses.

[@alisonpurgatory85]

Someone can be genuinely autistic/ADHD and still use their label as an excuse. Someone being autistic doesn't mean they're not going to ever evade accountability.

[@bekcytalyor]

On the autism topic - omg there's so much i could say 😂 I think you all have valid points. Im diagnosed autistic and have been learning more about myself which helps to understand myself and my autism more. However, a family member also has a diagnosis but uses it as an excuse to be a horrible person - "well i did X because im autistic so you're not allowed to say anything to me about it". He has never shown any accountability, to the detriment of all of his personal relationships, and I massively suspect he is narcissistic. This has even put off other family members enquiring about themselves having autism because they think autism = being a c*nt, as shown by example. Also i would personally say "characteristic" rather than "symptom" - and i think a lot of people can relate to autistic characteristics because they are all just human characteristics - having a diagnosis (like ashley said) just means having a level of characteristics which become impactful or debilitating to day to day life. For me, i always felt ashamed and embarrassed and never felt sure of what i "should" do or what's expected of me in any social situation, and now that i understand why im different, i dont feel so ashamed. I also think soooooooooo many more people are autistic than we/they know, and sometimes i wonder if being autistic/neurodivergent is just being human, and if we are all just different flavours of autism ❤

[@Raddiebaddie]

“I can think of one other person you could do that with” 😂

[@McKrysta]

Not Ashley screaming like a goat when her hat fell off 😂 Happy birthday Mak! 🎉

[@stephben8042]

Diagnosed here: eds, AuDhd. It’s “hard to talk about” in the way that you are because it is, indeed, ableist. Functioning labels are a thing of the past as you don’t know what’s going on in someone’s internal experience, or how they are masking, in front of you or away from you. You can’t tell how things impact someone’s daily experience. Both of us having eds, which btw, is much more common for autistic people to have, should know this, as you may not seem to struggle with disability outwardly, but you still do in reality. When I come to your shows it is hard but you certainly can’t tell I’m autistic while I’m there. I enjoyed it, btw. Mak, a diagnosis is something that gives you answers and community of likeminded people. Plenty of people feel empowered getting their diagnosis at 40, or 60, or 70 years old. There is no timeframe on self discovery. Loved the birthday bits.

[@fannydoucet6750]

This

[@el_2904]

Thank you for posting this, I was disappointed by their really ableist discussion of autism and ADHD.

[@someonesomehow379]

15:03 ashley's reiterations were INCREDIBLE 😭😭

[@BeingHuman547]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAK🥂 WE LOVE YOU AND APPRECIATE YOU🧿❤️

[@kapowjam3462]

I laughed so hard at Ashley repeating Alayna's list. That was my very favorite bit. Happy birthday Mak! 🥳

[@megancurtis9502]

I'm so glad we saw the party hat in the intro because I think seeing Mak tuck that party blower away would have broken me otherwise 😂

[@mhennessy8230]

I think there's such a fine line between mental health as an excuse and as an explanation.

[@rickicharlize]

Happy birthday, Mak! Merch idea when it finally happens: 90’s themed cringy family pictures on a holiday card PLEASE!

[@bekcytalyor]

Ashley i laughed at the "bible. And if youre not religious, constitution"

[@JuMixBoox]

I love the ratify versus rectify judgements, please keep going😂

[@boikanyontsimane8641]

“Are you Sia?” Still funny as hell🤣

[@girl_fromthenorthcountry]

This was a great episode. Paused on my TV to like it 10 minutes in. I usually do it at the end. Forever celebrating Mak

[@jul.m.2692]

"YOU ARE AUTISTIC". Says the person with the computer science degree, the spreadsheets, the lines, the script, the morning routine. Women in STEM! Game recognises game. There's a reason we flock to you. Not like we've been saying it here for 6 months. 😬

[@someonesomehow379]

10:10 Danny rolling the clip is HILARIOUS 😭😭

[@louis0320]

only 6 minutes in and i already think this is one of my fav episodes, well done chosen family!!

[@Nicole-IH]

That hat was filled to the brim with goofy and the minute Ashley put that on her head 🎉 goofy town here we go 😂 love you guys, thank you for a great Wednesday every week

[@jessicawier2914]

Happy Birthday Mak 🎉🎉 Love My Chosen Family!!

[@Elliot-thefrog]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAC!!!!!!!!🎉🎉🥳🥳🥳

[@kerizella]

hands down one of the best episodes!!!!! Sweet and hilarious

[@michellerbn]

The way Mak said the question was drama and i was SO READY TO HEAR IT and it just….kept not happening 😂😂😂😂

[@slightlycrunchygrass]

this episode had me in hysterics 😂 (Ashley you're so funny)

[@WolfSlumberStudy]

Aay Happy Birthday big brother!! Hope you had the best day (I know birthdays can be really hard for some of us because we put unnecessarily high expectations on the day- I just hope you had a nice day to relax and spend time doing what makes you genuinely happy) , I'm really looking forward to this episode :D Sending loads of love and hugs, you're doing amazing

[@caseyneill7015]

Happiest of birthdays to Mak for March and for Alayna for April.. Ashley your time is coming.. 🎉😅

[@GrapefruitCat2]

Love this episode especially the commitment to the hat ♡ Ashley as long as you have that hat you can be your uncensored yourself (also happy birthday Mak! )

[@anapalacinka]

I'm so glad I randomly decided to watch this one on KZbin for once 😂😂

[@boredveryverybored9887]

Whenever they bring up special interest I remember Alayna's "I'm special interested" joke from a while ago. Cracks me up every time

[@ItsEmmy69]

Tbh this is like one of the funniest episodes, the beginning where they ''forgot'' maks birthday really had my crying laughing Also happy (late) birthday mak

[@briannacruz2816]

You guys are just talking about disabilities, so I wanted to say that I’m a 21-year-old, Hispanic, blind, gay girl, who watches you guys. This is not important at all. I just wanted to share.

[@valley_sock_zero]

I disagree this was super important ❤

[@briannacruz2816]

@@valley_sock_zero aw thank you

[@karinasharma3632]

(ik blindness is a spectrum so dumb joke but) woah u watch the videos?!

[@fannydoucet6750]

What you were talking about at the end is kind of dangerous, it can easily be feeding into the gatekeeping discourse of "the autism parents" who feel like the newly diagnosed autistics are stealing the label from their children (and themselves, bc they make a big deal about THEIR pain as parents). Self diagnosis is valid, you have to be privileged to have access to an official one. Newly diagnosed autistics can often act especially weird bc the relief of finally feeling allowed to be yourself can make us act into an opposite extreme : we basically have to rediscover who we are, and at the same time often feel we need to prove it is true - imagine feeling that ? Also, I don't know about those specific hecklers, but saying something disrespectful and immediately realize the problem is very common and the rupture might not show on my face, so they could say something messed up by accident and right away explain where it came from. That doesn't mean they shouldn't apologize of course. To end this Ted Talk (it's still the autism acceptance month !), I'll remind everyone that : if you have met one autistic person, you have met one autistic person. And go follow "I'm autistic, now what" on yt, she has very good content

[@JanneBernards]

I'm laughing that the most animated, talking through each other discussion on this pod so far is about the concept of "leagues".

[@aliciaswift24]

I agree with Mak. When I look at a person I'm looking at a person as a whole being before I decid that there out of my league.

[@AniMin82]

About knowing that you're awkward but still doing it: I've always been "weird" and the thing is I see people react to me so I know what I did made them stop smiling, but I don't know why and I don't know what I should have done differently and I definitely don't know how to fix it now that it's happened. This gives me heaps of stress. So telling people that I know I'm weird often makes people take things less personally, relax again, and smile again. That is why we say it. Or at least it is for me. Edit: I also tend to tell people that if there's anything that I do that makes them uncomfortable, they should tell me (not "hint", just say it) and I won't be offended and I'll stop doing it.

[@eyeseajujubee]

Ashley and Alayna being divorced parents who want the Mak aka the kid to like them more was a hilarious bit 😂 Happy Belated Birthday Mak!! 🎉

[@chelseababcock91]

Ashley you are on fire in this ep, holy shit

[@sergbastian5]

Omg Mac I dreamt I met you down here in Florida and gave you a birthday hug. Happy 25th ❤

[@NeonCatStays]

I actually love how Ashley’s hat gets progressively more wonky throughout the video 😂

[@someonesomehow379]

17:30 guys this episode is something else 😭😭

[@someoneelse7629]

I once met a girl that was so waaaay out of my league, she is one of the countrys leading scientist in her field, earns a lot, has her shit together in all kind of ways, but she is not concidered "pretty", I was not single at the time, but we hit off 100% since I have a hobby that a bit overlaps with her profession, we talked about it in depth, and she was suprised how much I knew and how little she had to "dumb down" (her words) her very complicated and niche work for me to understand it and be able to have a conversation about it, we also got into talking about relations and she said something like "there is no line waiting to date a nerdy girl that looks like this", and it stung me in the heart.... To me she was a fantastic person, totally out of my league

[@ttarotkidd]

i love you all so much

[@raylynmaeray]

“-you’re hair looks so cute right now.” Was SUCH an ADHD moment though 😆 💀

[@TaylorWelborn-ce1nd]

I am diagnosed with ADHD & self diagnosed ASD, but getting a formal test this week, per my therapist. one thing that i think of is the diagnoses allow me to understand myself, but also have the words to the outside world. and i was so nervous people would think i would be using it as an “excuse” but to me (and many neurodivergent people) an “excuse” is different than an “explanation.” when i saw someone say that i was like YES! i’m not trying to be rude, i just need to “explain” to make me understand the world or social situation. when i say, “oh sorry i interrupted that probably comes from my ADHD” or “i don’t make eye contact with you it might be an autistic trait” i am explaining. i feel i’m not EXCUSING any behavior that someone else might be hurt by because i am actively getting help & continuing to work on and find tools to help social interaction etc.

[@Taurus_Butterfly]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAK! 🎈🥳🎂🎁🤗 I love that you are celebrating yourself! A dearly departed friend of mine said, "leagues are for sports, which I largely despise." I wish I could make myself believe that. Every once in awhile I'm dumb enough to try out of my league, if I really like/connect with the person.

[@Hammerhead_Films]

THREE MINUTES IN AND SO MANY EMOTIONS ALREADY

[@ironiceilidh]

the league convo is literally the whole “they’re a ten but…” tiktok trend

[@Elliot-thefrog]

I love these podcasts their my life!!!! Y’all are sooo funny!

[@kylecat98]

One of the funniest episodes. The editing has been so extra recently!

[@Carson0912]

As a late diagnosed autistic AFAB person I agree that learning that you are autistic doesn’t give you the right to use it as an excuse to act out in public. Unmasking and being comfortable with yourself and doing something that is blatantly disrespectful are two completely different things.

[@jul.m.2692]

Calling out, interrupting, acting impulsively are LITERALLY diagnosable ADHD traits though. Congrats you have the more socially acceptable disability...? And the more developed frontal lobe, which gives you the most impulse control. Btw i'm being a bit sarcastic here, but the facts still stand. I really hope no one says that to you if you ever have a meltdown in public.

[@spriddlez]

I love seeing how much fun they are having. Big smile on my face :)

[@DeeDee97]

This was the funniest episode yet!!! Had my stomach in stitches as I was trying to drive to work

[@gadogado4468]

Comedy has social rules that no-one tells you about 👀 New anxiety unlocked. Happy Birthday Mak! Enjoy your one slice of cake 😂

[@JanneBernards]

It's not that hard: just don't speak or yell things unless asked a direct question. It's really not different than watching other stage performances, like a play. You wouldn't talk through or yell things to the actors during a play.

[@Mika-yn9mj]

There are other rules that I didn’t realize with comedy. Like it is always appropriate to laugh, but less appropriate to cheer, clap, or verbally agree(“damn straight”, woohoo, etc). Ashley makes it part of her opening bit to yell about how to be a good comedy audience. It helped(besides not realizing the opening yelling about how terrible we were was also a bit… I hope😂).

[@Max.in.the.daily.]

4 things: 1. Mak, “YOUR AUTISM”😂 2. Ratify the pinky finger, ratify alayna’s sister 3: whatpod, idk whatpod are we on abt😂😂😂 4 aincent Ashley once said “happyybrithgaygyghgygyghgpgpgggttgt”(*insert gremlin speak*)😂😂😂

[@zyxxyzify]

Autism diagnosis is important because autism usually comes with other co morbid health problems. Without knowing you are autistic, it makes it really hard to puzzle the other health problems. Yes there are 3 different levels of needs in autism however, that doesn’t make it less valid in terms of disability. So, if diagnosis is available to you - and yes it’s a really hard process and out of reach for majority of people - I would highly recommend it. Unfortunately it just never ends with being autistic, there is more to it. Other benefits of diagnosis is actually learning about things can help you and make your life easier as well as learning to advocate yourself. Just putting it out there as a general info.

[@hello_its_jo9951]

I got my ASD diagnosis at age 32 and the only reason was that the label helped me with my self talk as I understand better why I do some things and find others difficult. Also, when it comes to parenting, I think it would have been helpful to know going in, but in my 'adult' life it affects me very little because I already had my coping strategies.

[@jwmprcht7273]

I'm so glad that now Mak is 25, she has finally changed her sweater AND the camera angle 😍 Couldn't have gone another week trying to differentiate between her face, the wall and that less-than-beige sweater (it looks comfy though) 🙈 Now, the sunlight hits her face, the eyes are poppin' AND the angle also has potential to make the viewership's visual experience even better, for example by putting a little plant next to the TV and hanging up some Star Wars poster on the wall above the couch.

[@canadianicedragon2412]

Alayna: "This ship has sailed" My brain: It sailed. It hit an iceberg. It is resting at the bottom of the ocean. Hesk the bottom of the Marianas Trench. Ashley the salty, cynical, comedian who sometimes takes things too far... "I hated that. I hate pranks." Alayna, the sweet innocent mom-energy of the group... "I loved that." Alayna commits to a bit... Next year on Ashley's b-day "I came up with a list of 72 things I like about you."

[@Mariethechaotic]

15:23 I died laughing at Ashley summing up Alayna's list item, not once, but twice by saying "you are autistic". As someone who, early on, felt like Mak was autistic, as I likely am as well, I love it when they talk about "special interests" or Ashley straight up just calls her autistic. I would love to hear how Mak actually feels about it, whether she thinks that it is and if she'd pursue diagnosis (though self-diagnosis is widely accepted in the autistic community because it is so difficult and expensive to get diagnosed officially, there are some pretty extensive online tests to see how many factors apply to you.)..... I typed this while it was paused and then unpaused it for Ashley to ask the same question 😂.

[@Mariethechaotic]

Follow up, Mak, after watching the whole video....if you read the comments. Honestly, I would do at least an online test, if for no other reason than your own knowledge. Sensory issues, special interests, executive dysfunction.... No it won't change anything but it might help you understand some things about yourself and connect with a community of people who relate to you. I was originally going to say and maybe give you coping suggestions but it sounds like you have that managed really well. If anything I'd say embrace it. Your "parents" are obviously very accepting and love you for who you are and your special interests. I was diagnosed with ADHD about 3 years ago and it changed the way I looked at everything in my past. I spent my entire childhood, teens and young adulthood feeling like I was "secretly stupid" because I struggled so much and had no idea why. Getting diagnosed helped me far more than just the meds I got on. I haven't sought an autism diagnosis because it's too expensive and there's no actual benefit aside from validation for me but I'd say like, at least take some online tests, watch some content from low-needs autistic people. Is there anyone in your family who is autistic? That's another good sign. My 6 year old niece is diagnosed autistic, my 10 year old son is on the never ending fucking waitlist to be assessed but very likely is (right now, his special interests is Rubik's cubes).

[@Louisyed]

At 19:48 when Mak answers deadly seriously and Ashley is cracking up 😂

[@significantsoil5345]

Happy Birthday Mak! This was such a great episode! I love when the focus is on Mak❤

[@caseykettering8933]

Happy bday! 🎉

[@DanielleDrewa]

My thanking Ashley out load in my room for finally saying that no one talks about how hot Alayna is!! Like seriously!! Alayna you are beautiful😍😍😍

[@verenadejori5671]

This episode was just funny from the beginning to end!🤩🤣 Loved it !

[@theszmek]

I laughed so hard this episode hope you've all had peaceful birthdays 🎉

[@kabilei2260]

I’m seeking comfort in this podcast bc my crush at work just admitted to me two nights ago that she likes me back and we’re both stuck living with men and the tension is so real at work every day, I am so nervous and feel guilty for what we’re starting, but we’ve both tried to leave our relationships only to be forced to stay. It’s hard and nerve wracking

[@aliviafletcher8926]

this had me laughing out loud at 2 am💀happy birthday mak!!!!

[@Tobiasz_Zaremba]

Happy birthday Mak! In my country, we wish each other a hundred years of life on our birthday, but I'm not that cruel. So I wish Mak would be as happy as I am unhappy.

[@mikaelwarhuus9451]

When Ashley asked "What kind of crisis, Alayna?" and looked into the camera, I was really hoping Alayna would just blurt out "quarter-life crisis" and give Ashley the springboard she wanted xD

[@graceblondell7320]

hey guys! id go with traits instead of symptoms

[@EmaMcLeary]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAK! 🥳

[@kapowjam3462]

Oh the hat is amazing! Jen did great!

[@mrsloveandbeauty]

I REALLY needed a good laugh today. This cured me. Thank you. 🙏

[@ttarotkidd]

I need Mak's sweater it looks so comfy!!!!

[@one1oneisme]

This was one of the funniest episodes 😂

[@mariannetfinches]

28:29 This needs to be a gif. I have no idea what it represents. But if I hadn't already joined the patreon this episode would have done it. You guys were on top form!

[@vvdwl8782]

Thankyou for talking on the diagnosis topic

[@beardlessdragon]

happy birthday, Mak!! this episode was so funny

[@arika6]

I'm ADHD with SPD, for me it's the motive behind the behavior between all the neurodiversities... but iykyk and if you don't, you don't. I feel like talking about it decreases the stigma at least for Autism as there has been so much. We're learning so much about the brain and how it presents different for different people.

[@loupelizzo2399]

Wishing Mac a Happy Birthday and loved the podcast

[@Andracarys]

It's not a symptom, it's more of a trait, though some may feel like symptoms as they can be super uncomfortable.

[@reasonkaa]

Happy birthday, Mak! 🫶🏻🩷💘 I wish you great health, lovely moments with your girlfriend, loads of love, and happiness!!

[@RakshadaShirley]

Happy Birthday Mak! Who knew birthday podcasts were the funniest.

[@sophiea1270]

Everyone was so funny 😂 happy birthday Mak 🎉

[@tuvamartinsgard3402]

You’re crazyyyyy this episode and i love it!!!!❤❤❤ kinda the best episode ever 😂🤣

[@Zweigenhaft9]

Ashleyyy I’m so happy for you that you’re charging $50 a ticket for your LA show but also devastated that I’ll be missing your show twice in a row

[@Eisog]

This was such a good episode. Yall are so funny 😂

[@You-Toob-name-here]

Happy birthday baby 🎉

[@KalhyceK]

Happy Birthday Mak!! 🎉🎉 I recently used the term "out of my league" to refer to someone that caused me gay panic out on the street. And I was certainly intimidated about her looks, style, and general social standing vibe. So yeah, it's about feeling intimidated.

[@NotPMHarper]

On the topic of autism: There is the idea of the broad autism phenotype (though it is controversial) that is essentially subclinical autism, meaning you don't meet all the necessary criteria (one of which is "Symptoms cause clinically significant impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of current functioning.") but have a large number of traits. Autism has been shown to be quite hereditary so a theory is that those with broad autism phenotype (BAP) have that genetic link to autism but their brain is not different enough to meet those clinical levels. It can be helpful to think about your biological family and whether any of them were diagnosed or showed traits of autism or ADHD (as ADHD is highly correlated with autism, but ADHD is often a more obvious "problem" if someone has both).