What are some of the most-creative or least-creative improvised weapons you've seen?

[@lilladykd5348]

Mine sounds strange. A wand of fireballs. I had a barbarian who killed a sorcerer he grabbed it. It had been flavored as large stick. He couldn’t get back to his weapon so… stick it is. He didn’t “know” what he was doing just that it kept blowing up when he smacked people with it. Hurt him and hurt the bad people…. He wouldn’t give up the stick after it was over.

[@keepironman14]

Sounds like a staff more than a wand.

[@Ferrari255GTO]

@@keepironman14 didn't you read? The barbarian said stick, he's gotta be right XD

[@sherylcascadden4988]

Explody stick hurts me, but hurts other guy too. Sounds like a barbarian.

[@davidotoole2853]

@@sherylcascadden4988 whack why no more big boom booms

[@feranard]

Reminds me of an old anime reference. Sword that literally causes an explosion on each strike. It’s name: EXPLOSION!

[@o.d.d.792]

Had a warforged NPC companion that was a large creature and we were in a war in a forest with a neighboring nation and that nation had artillery that hit near us and dropped a flaming tree. My character and myself had the idea for his friend to use that flaming tree as a weapon. He held it up like a shield that was on fire and he was immune to fire damage so he had no trouble holding it and easily broke through a shield wall and reached the commander of the forces. Two bat swings with a flaming tree against his two guards near him and a NAT 20 intimidation. We single handedly captured 300 soldiers.

[@Currin4]

I once critted the bbeg with a thrown severed head, and was so amused with that,after we escaped I had its skull plated in gold with spikes and had the “of returning” modifier added to it. A spiked skull of throwing.

[@tyrelhaz]

Our drunkmonkminotaur made nunchucks out of 2 dragon thigh bones and our hexblade made a whip out of its tail.

[@Jfreek5050]

Had a goliath paladin/barbarian multiclass scream "You dare sir!?" then removed his own glove, and slapped some nobleman in offence to his shit antics. Nat 20. Knocked him unconscious.

[@puddel9079]

Ah, the classic.

[@martinkonrat400]

It is all fun and games until paladin bitch slaps you with plate glove.

[@CroobieLetter]

I was not prepared for how funny this was. I should improvise weapons more often

[@evilauthor13]

My old grew was doing Werewolf Apocalypse. My husband's character was in a car accident and the people who ran him off the road went at him with a silver knife. He transformed into his Werewolf form, ripped the door off the car and attacked with it. "You just brought a knife to a door fight!" ...he won the fight. Door beats knife. By a lot.

[@olivernavas4569]

HA

[@starsetgamer8914]

Similar story, playing werewolf and had run out of ammo, my character was a mechanic for the group and had a bike so she knew around how much one weighed. She grabbed the enemy Hunter's bike and used it as a weapon of mass destruction. Legitimately destroyed 2 buildings with a bike while killing those who were trying to kill her and the fae touched brother.

[@zadime92]

Our Barbarian killed a Goblin with a bed. This was not just a regular Goblin, he was a miniboss in the current dungeon, and was giving both our Cleric and Fighter a really hard time. Only for the Barbarian to pick up what was probably the Goblins' own bed and kill him with it.

[@jacobrobuck7260]

Well THAT goblin certainly took a permanent nap!

[@ceylonwilliams8353]

Yah rest in peace

[@samnault716]

One of the party members shot a twig blight with an arrow, so I described how this twig blight now had an arrow protruding from it. The next PC asked if he could grab the arrow and use it as a handle to throw the twig blight at another enemy. Of course, I said yes and had him roll damage against both enemies. Rule of cool wins!

[@naturalone6529]

Our party’s Paladin was fighting a group of cultists; he had the Tavern Brawler feat, giving him proficiency with improvised weapons, so he picked up the body of another cultist and hit the first one with it, then proceeded to pump a Divine Smite into the corpse.

[@i.m.pemployeeofthemonth]

Me and my party were in a bar in a bad side of a town that was basically run by bandits. The rule at this bar was no weapons so when a fight broke out everything that wasn't nailed down was used as a weapon. Our wizard started throwing plates, the rogue used forks and knives, my barbarian used chairs and threw tables and our bard was playing "yakkity sax" through the whole thing

[@seabass819]

I was a fairy druid, in a homebrew setting and flew up 30 ft above a raptors head, then wild shaped into a cow, plummeting I to it. I was a cow-nettic bombardment device.

[@shadefelblade]

My dad once was in a pirate esc dnd campain ... he played a warforged named anchor, who fought with a anchor and worked as the ship's anchor aswell

[@AssumedPseudonym]

My favorite one was in a barroom brawl. Several players went for the usual stuff, broken bottles and bar stools and the like. One guy got a bit fancier and grabbed a bottle of champagne. Champagne bottles are a lot sturdier than beer or whiskey bottles, so the DM basically ruled it was a light mace that would only break if he rolled a nat 1 (which he didn’t). The creative part was that this was an unopened bottle (and you probably see where this is going by now). He wound up popping the cork in someone’s face for 1d4. ^.^

[@josephtownsend2103]

The absolute worst improvised weapon I have ever had in a campaign. The sickly and crippled daughter of the bandit chief. Now, we were already familiar with the adorable house-bound 10-year-old bundle of joy as she was the poster girl of the inn we frequented. She was always there sitting behind the front desk to welcome us with a smile and would listen wide-eyed to our tales of adventure. We loved her as if she was our own. We had finally discovered the identity of the bandit chief who had been terrorizing the town since the beginning of the campaign and learned that the reason he had become a bandit was to collect money for his daughter's treatment. She had a rare muscle degenerating disease that was incredibly difficult to cure and killed most of its victims before they turned 12. After hearing his story, most of the party was swaying towards helping them, possibly even becoming bandits themselves if it meant saving the life of their surrogate daughter. But our party's Lawful Evil warrior, who had been a member of the town guard and lost a lot of friends to the bandit raids, wasn't going to let that happen. He grapped the child by her spindly legs. Swung her up into the air as she screamed and smashed her face first into her father's head, who was paralyzed in horror. Splattering her brains and blood across all of us. Yeah. He had a series of "logical" reasoning behind his actions based around "the life of a single girl wasn't worth the lives of an entire town" and "he would have revenge for his fallen brethren". But, as you can probably imagine, NOBODY was happy with him after that, and he quickly became the target of everyone's wrath though thanks to a few lucky and unlucky rolls, he was able to escape. We asked his player to take a break from our group for a while as we were all more than a little disturbed by his actions. However, after a couple of months to cool off, apologies for going too far in his role-playing, and some time to rebuild our bonds away from the game, we ended up inviting him and his character back later in the campaign as a bloodthirsty justice-crazed vigilante wanted by both sides of the law. Think Punisher only even less restraint and moral compass. We all enjoyed delivering justice upon the lunatic, our friend pulled out a new character he had prepared, and we continued our game.

[@jackberberette5093]

We were in an abandoned bar interrogating a pair of bandits. The half-orc of our party got bored and tired of our lack of progress. So he screamed, "DIPLOMACY!" Andnthrew a beer mug at one of the bandits. Nat 20. A bandit died, we got our information, and the half orc got a new weapon.

[@lbpblitz]

A strawberry pie. I was running an encounter where the party was chasing down a wanted criminal Wizard through a large city. While everyone else was chasing him the normal way, the fighter climbed up on a roof and threw a pie he had won at a fair that afternoon. CRIT! I ruled that the Wizard had looked over his shoulder just in time to get nailed in the face with pie filling going in his eyes and nose. He got blinded and knocked prone. Pie has become the party's weapon of choice to drive me insane.

[@PleasentDddd]

I once killed a goblin with a kobold. The kobold’s spikes disemboweled him. I was playing a cleric.

[@blakeetter280]

This one kinda scared me XD So the party kinda picked up a lot of junk across the campaign and held on to it. At the end we had to siege a wall and instead of actually trying they just did this. So the rogue had been hauling around a barrel since basically session one when he wanted it for a gag, don’t remember what. So that’s where we started. Next the nails (same reason) hammered in sticking out. Now the warlock had bombs but not just any bombs homemade bombs, IE glass bottles with gunpowder. Poured in the gunpowder and broken glass. Rogue thinks to add the ball bearings they got when they started. At this point they also note that a lot of the metal should be rusty now too, so tetanus damage too I guess. The fighter noted he had oil and alchemists fire, so that soaked the barrel. To finish off this warcrime the cleric noted he had a bronze griffin. So this thing lifted the whole barrel and dropped it on the wall. I didn’t even calculate damage I just killed everything in a hundred feet and wounded everything else. This fucker had two kegs of gunpowder in it and several pounds of shrapnel, nobody was left in fighting condition.

[@bounce9434]

Tetanus damage. Was it effective?

[@blakeetter280]

@@bounce9434 not really cuz they all died of shrapnel anyways.

[@puglife658]

I wasn’t a player or dm for this but I once saw someone use a mostly petrified party member as an improvised weapon. Also, the same campaign, a player lost his sword and picked up a butter knife. That knife was one of the most deadly weapons that was ever wielded.

[@NerdyCatCoffeeee]

*Deep in combat, arrows fly everywhere, the orc has just discovered the boom stick's power, he's on the frontlines while the cleric is crouching in cover nearby, same as the orc.* Orc_ "CLERIC! FOCUS ME WITH YOUR MAGIC WORDS! I JUST FOUND THE BOOMSTICK!" Cleric_*yelling* "A whaaat?" Orc_ "IT GOES BOOM WHEN I SMACK! HEAL ME WHILE I"M AT IT!" ...

[@raul-aurelianserban8295]

@@NerdyCatCoffeeee wrong comment

[@pizzalock1760]

Huh who knew a knife made for butter is better at slashing the lungs out instead of a sword lol

[@NerdyCatCoffeeee]

@@raul-aurelianserban8295 dcda

[@Alacrity199]

I had just been turned to stone, the barbarian grabbed me and used me as an extremely durable club. When brought back to town and turned back to flesh I was covered in bruises.

[@fire083]

not me but a close friend who is no longer around to share this. His gnome fighter had a thing for castle gates. he would convince someone to launch him onto our over the castle wall near the main gate 15 minutes or so later he would come back running with the entire gate leading flat over top. I don't remember what the gnomes strength was, but the army in front was surprised to be mowed over by the spikes along the top or bottom of said gate.

[@MakeMeLOLZ101]

One of my players was a halfling fighter. The player had been absent for a while, so another player took control. In one session, the halfling got petrified by a Gorgon, which had only 1 hit point left. Another player, frustrated with the encounter and just wanting it to end already, threw the petrified halfling at the Gorgon, killing it and breaking the statue.

[@mazio_os]

Witnessed an homebrew campaign set in the 70s where one PC used a big Toblerone bar as a club. They kept this weapon for most of the campaign

[@MrKeyblademaster1992]

In a bar fight in our last session, our Loxodon Cleric/fighter used one of his abilities to grow to giant size during a bar fight and used one of four crossbowmen who were shooting us from above as a weapon. Not only did he smash one of the others with it, he killed the guy with fire while using another ability to trap the guy he'd hit in fiery shackles. I believe his fighter archetype was Rune Knight but I'm not sure

[@Brorca]

The most absurd and creative improvised weapons was a bar of soap, wielded by Mad Dog Morgan. The bar of soap became so integral to how he fought that he got a magical, +1 infinite wellspring of soap called Irish Spring Infinity.

[@monmusumaster]

My favorite one was the Bear Trapper Chain Whip. Literally just a bear trap attached to a 20ft length of industrial chain. Used to whack and "grapple" people up to 20 feet away and then either swing them around to slam them into things or fling them, or pull them closer to hit with a proper weapon.

[@jonathanhancock470]

A piano. A grand piano. The party was fighting a possessed suit of armor in a mansion. Our barbarian, bless his soul, asked if he could hurl the piano at the armor. The DM said he could roll athletics if he wanted. Nat 20. Needless to say, that did the trick. Our monk/resident-hoarder even looted some piano wire from the wreckage which came up months later in the campaign: once to choke out a cultist from behind and once again to tangle up the turbines of a pirate ship. The monk was wildly successful in both cases.

[@jacobb5484]

During a one shot modern horror adventure I *tried* to craft an improvised bow and arrow out of a tree limb, Paracord, Sharp rocks, and shrub stalks. (Something I’ve actually done IRL) The character was a aspiring woodsman with degree in Forestry + Anthropology, and the setting was Autumn in Massachusetts, so I assumed it wouldn’t be a problem. I wasn’t trying to meta game particularly, simply trying to do something with downtime, and as a way to regain some sliver of control again the paranoia of an obviously looming threat. I expected worst case it would be shoddy and snap after the first shot is fired playing into the horror. Instead the GM threw a hissy fit and said I couldn’t find a single remotely pointed stone on a 2 day trek along a rocky trail after making several 10-15+ search rolls.

[@alexanderthegreat6682]

In curse of Strahd we stumbled upon half a dozen vampire spawn slumbering in a warehouse, and so we took whatever furniture we could and broke them and then sharpened them into wooden stakes to assassinate all but three of them, who weren't quite as much of a threat when I, a paladin with a Sun Sword, and our Gith Wizard were waiting for them with powerful spells.

[@delafontainedoes]

In a campaign I was running, our bard was attempting to convince some super scary guards he was one of them - dressed in all black, and they had these awesome black scythes. Our bard, not having a black scythe, pulled out his scribe's ink, dumped it all over a dagger and then taped it to the end of his quarterstaff. It worked.

[@JessalienYT]

So basically what you're saying is aboard turned his dagger into a scythe, and convinced two guards that he was one of them, that sounds awesome!

[@scorpioperk1137]

Goliath wild soul barbarian... used his own severed leg (Cut was at the pelvis). Killed several vampire spawn and a vampire lord with it.

[@lucapiemonti9767]

I once played a thiefling monk-barbarian who died fighting a demon, using the bones poking out from his partially ripped-off forearms as stabbing weapons in his last moments.

[@j-rod5930]

This is one that happened pretty recently. I'm playing Odyssey if the Dragonlords. The group decided to take refuge at a Dwarf fortress but they'd only let us in if we gave them our weapons. We do so and are immediately ambushed. Everyone in the group had gotten a golden arrow from an early quest so I had my barbarian take it out and start stabbing everyone like it was a prison shank.

[@1Ring42]

One of my most memorable quotes as a DM: "No the burning mummy does not count as a monk weapon." As a player, Drunkenfist (later renamed to Bull Mammoth) was rather fond of grappling a random enemy then using that poor bastard as an improvised great club. Notably he used that tactic to kill a bone devil when he was level 7. He also dropped a tree onto a duergar mind master.

[@sherylcascadden4988]

Back in the 80s DM ruled our barbarian had proficiency in small humanoid due to the number of times he used goblins that way.

[@chubbyanimalenthusiast70]

We were a party of all spell casters (which I don’t recommend) Dm: you notice the skeletons are weak to bludgeoning attacks Me: I use my quarter staff Cleric (who worshipped cheese) I bonk them on the head with my cheese wheel Wizard 1: I headbutt the crap out of him Wizard 2: can I use the door we knocked over Dm: sure why not Wizard 2: CRIT sorcerer: I break his face with a book

[@d34dstruck13]

I had a friend who was dwarf in one campaign. He stole a bag of grapefruits from a tavern, turned around and one shot a hydra by throwing said bag of grapefruits at it

[@UndeadVengence]

My Barbarian/Rogue once ripped an anti-magic stone eye, weighing several hundred pounds, off of it's pedestal and threw it at a vampire that was attacking us. Since I was a strength based assassin, I was able to use sneak attack damage, instantly crushing the vampire to dust.

[@catluvr2]

In LEGO Star Wars, I used the Force to pick up a bench that an NPC was sitting on, and then threw the bench at them. Not quite what you're looking for, story-wise, but still fun.

[@leekonze7441]

The character that fights his way out of prison with his peg leg reminds me of the saying "busy as a one-legged man in an ass kicking contest" In a modern game I was running, the Sorcerer had run out spell slots while fighting Zombies in a convenience store. So, he started chucking canned goods at the Zombies and scored a critical hit with a can of creamed corn, which killed a zombie. In a 3.0e DnD game I was playing a Barbarian with a magical great sword. We were fighting pirates and got disarmed. The party's evil Dwarf Fighter and Wererat Assassin decided to tag team against me and take my sword for themselves. After throwing the Assassin overboard, my Barbarian ripped up one of the ship's deck planks and proceeded to beat the Dwarf into unconsciousness with said plank.

[@Jake-ky4yj]

My first time ever playing DnD, I had a druid with high strength and slight anger issues, the party was level 1 fighting our first fight. I started the fight casting entangle, and every enemy passed the saving throw. Next round, I used and ice knife... Missed. And they all passed saving throws... again... The fight went on for another what seems like forever and I decided screw it, I'll go into melee cause I have no spells or attack cantrips... there was a good 3 rounds where I kept exchanging misses with the enemy and I what happened next was a blessing from the dice gods. I let out an enraged war cry and I throw my sword to the ground and tackle my guy to the ground. I rolled pretty high, ended up pinning him to the ground. His turn rolls around, tries to get out of it, but again I keep him down like a pro. Then my turn comes... Still screaming, with my shield strapped to my arm, I take it and start bashing it's face in. Nat 20... The DM doesn't know exactly what to do since it's an improvised weapon technically so he tells me roll a d4 and add my strength. I got a 4 +2 str. Which was doubled to 12 damage. I completely destroyed it's head and the DM gave all the other enemies remaining fear of my character.

[@Amayawolf_01]

In one of my very first games we found what could best be described as a "murder basement" which some guards were helping us investigate, we found out that a chest in the corner of the room was actually a mimic. It swallowed one guard whole and ripped the arm off another. If I recall correctly, we ended up using that severed arm to bludgeon the mimic to death, and that poor guard *definitely* needed therapy after the incident

[@arkron81]

This happened when I was playing a one-shot back in the late years of college. We were spelunking an old, abandoned temple with its entrance we found at the end of a long cave. Mid-way through the temple, we found a ghost. I don't remember the specific monster, only that it was immune to non-magical weapons, as they'd just pass through it. We were all level three, and for character creation we could all pick one uncommon magic item, armor or weapon. The orc barbarian player did not pick a magical weapon (reasons why escape me), and the gnome fighter (me) was wearing a magical piece of armor. The barbarian looked at my fighter, looked at the DM, and said, "I pick up the gnome and swing him at the ghost like a club." The DM says "okay". And then the barbarian picked my character right up by the legs and used the poor gnome as a makeshift club as he held his arm in front of his face for dear life. The DM ruled the magic armor made my gnome into a makeshift 'improvised magical weapon'.

[@Ferrari255GTO]

*COW DAMAGE!!* is now my favorite quote thus far XD

[@ShalkaChannel]

This was a wild ride up until the end! Thanks again, your videos have become a precious daily moment of joy during my everyday routine- i always make sure not to exit the house without watching one, so i can face the world with a smile as i exit the door ^^

[@johnlacey6661]

A coldrin with the bottom taken off so you can see right through it, I had a character with the thunder clap spell and we were trapped behind a door with a hored of kobalds behind a giant metal door in a stone corridor...all kobald in the corridor had no heads after the thunder cannon got to them

[@jypsridic]

My half orc cleric once picked up a living and struggling goblin and used it as a shield while charging into the ranks of the ranged goblins in the back, I bashed one of them with it before switching back to my normal weapon.

[@kiritotheabridgedgod4178]

The strangest improvised weapon that's ever been used in any session I've attended, has to be "Steve" the octopus, one of my other party members familiar, the DM ruled that Steve was a whip that had a 50/50 chance to either poison or grapple anyone who was hit with him.

[@minimishapsgames894]

Party found a blunderbuss that had fallen into the world from another world, and since this was a high fantasy world they had no idea what it was or how it worked (and this particular world has no gun powder). By the end the wizard was igniting potatoes and then the druid was Controlling Weather into the other end to launch them.

[@DrJadedragon]

In the RPG ”Eon”, I got 1 point of proficiency in ”weapon: couch” after crit-ing an opponent when dropping the couch on it.

[@floridamanwentwild4411]

I was a drunken Master Monk half-orc with a soldier backround named Bakker the bar fighter and when rolling his stats he was an extremely strength based monk often times he doesnt use weapons normally just punches things but then I got the tavern brawler feat making me proficient with improv weapons such things he used are a Folding chair, a dead goblin I was using a nunchucks, throwing rocks, a frying pan, his flask, drinking flammable liquor and spitting it on a torch, an arm of a yeti, his foul smelling breath, beating a guy with his own helmet, a pen, Molotovs, a pillow, and a logging chain

[@abadidea5984]

Curse of Strahd: While exploring the attic of the mayor of Vallaki, our party comes across a locked door. My Artificer reveals through Detect Magic that the door has some kind of enchantment on it; most likely a trap. Unfortunately, with no way to dispel the magic, our only option was to find a way to safely discharge the trap, and then open the door. Looking at all the loose furniture and sundries scattered about the attic, my Artificer began drafting out plans for a spring-loaded rail-guided battering spring. I told the rest of the party to give the household another thorough search while I reached for my tinker's tools and got to work. By the time the party had returned, my contraption was completed; a homemade ballista aimed straight at the attic door. The payload: one whole couch.

[@NexeL_NKC]

I wasn’t there for this due to being on vacation at the time, but the monk in my current party decided to make a pair of Bruce Lee nunchucks out of two chair legs and a chain. We were all imprisoned in Cragmaw Castle at the time. I can only imagine the hijinks.

[@xavieryevergreen5684]

6:33 Florida man right there.

[@dragnl0rd]

For some reason i often find myself in games where footwear becomes lethal. The top two examples are: 1) A shoe. Back in the 3.5 days, our group was attacked in the middle of the night by a group of bandits, eager for the bounty on our heads (a long story stemming from a case of mistaken identity). Our DM liked making things interesting, so he'd basically created a party with class levels to attack us. One was a monk who was pretty cocky. Our fighter, sans armor as he didn't sleep in it, decides to ready his action to grapple this monk when he does his next attack. The monk goes to kick the fighter, and hits. The fighter goes for the grapple check and fails by one. The dm describes it as follows: "you almost catch his leg in your arms, but in a split second of panic, the bandit successfully yanks his foot out of his shoe, leaving you holding his footwear." The fighter, on his next turn, decides to try beating the monk with his own shoe. Critical hit. Second attack: critical hit again. In a single round the fighter had knocked the monk out with his own shoe. At this point the bard decided to test the morale of the bandits by saying "You've seen what my friend can do with a shoe. What do you think will happen once he picks up his sword?" The bandits ran away. 2) A shoelace. This was a shadowrun game where our party had been burned by a Mr. Johnson some time ago, as he'd opted to send in other mercs to kill our team rather than pay us. Our rigger lost his favorite drone, and our street samuriai lost her left leg as a result of the fight. Unfortunately we thought we'd just have to move on. A year (in game) and many jobs later, we're given a job to plant false data on a server. Part of the pre-job work was to obtain access codes from some middle manager who would meet us at a fancy nightclub. The kind where you have to leave your weapons in the car. We see our contact drinking with who else but the guy who burned us a year ago. We wait for the old Johnson to head to the facilities before our diplomat goes to meet our contact. Meanwhile the street samurai is still bitter about the lost leg (now replaced with a prosthetic), so she follows the jerk into the bathroom. She has no guns, but also wants to deal with the guy quietly, so the player asks "are the shoelaces on combat boots strong enough to double as a garrotte?" She proceeded to roll pretty well, and the body wasn't discovered until closing time, according to the news the next day.

[@andreagarton5535]

Okay! I got a good one: A table, specifically a dinning table, with food on it. My blood hunter/barbarian Widget, a DM homebrewed Lizard person race grabbed the table and *threw it* (thanks to a Nat 20 strangth check while rageing) at the party bard, Jay-Jay a DM homebrewed bird race , because she throw tomatoes at her, I don’t remember what made Jay-Jay throw the tomatoes, but I know that it ended in a **MASSIVE FOOD FIGHT**! For example, Widget catches a thrown pumpkin in her *mouth!* funnily enough, the DMPC, a blind guy named David (unknown class, but magic based) the Clerk/party “Moth mum” - has the we players dubbed her, she was literally a humanoid moth, (another DM homebrewed race) and Kitephorus aka Kite aka “Kid” has that what Widget called him where not splattered with food. The party scorsercer a human named Fenran (who’s player sadly left due to… DM related issues) joined in the food fight, after Widget spared him a glance, and gave him a smerck. Then the table went flying! Unfortunately, due to issues with the DM - to put it mildly, the campaign got canceled. And it was really sad. But my memories of the good times, like this food fight, are wonderful to look back on. 😊

[@viperblitz11]

A campaign I play in has a pair of recurring NPCs. One is a barbarian names Borscht, and the other is a smaller barbarian named Thunk who Borscht uses as a weapon.

[@clexmonkie89]

I don't remember if it was 3 or 3.5, but I DO remember getting a rope on a petrified zombie and then getting to use it as a ranged weapond for the rest of the dungeon.

[@sujiss]

Before I say this, this is the character who's trait is to overthink things, so befitting that he spends a combat round thinking. You want to hear the brilliant concoction of an idea he came up with? He runs over to a building beside him, crashes down the door, lights it on fire with a torch, rolls a NAT 20 for hit dice, and just bludgeons this small kobold into a smashed pile of ash. This was session one, what ride have I gotten myself into.

[@WhiteRoomMan]

Fun improvised build; play a Goliath or something with the powerful build feature, go rune knight fighter with the unarmed fighting style, then take tavern brawler. While enlarged, you are considered a huge creature for the sake of having no reduced movement while grappling medium creatures. Only takes 4 levels and you’re suddenly proficient in simple, martial and biological weapons

[@cooldemon5545]

My goliath barbarian character managed to use an enemy treant as a giant club against a hill giant and another treant. Nat 20s are fun.

[@Devistat0r]

DOOR nicknames killer of bosses because basically my friend tore a door off a crypt cell as a reference of a practice campaign for me- anyway so the door proceeded to accidentally block a bosses attack and deflect the attack. INSTANTLY KILLING THE BOSS our Dm enchanted the door for this then my friend enhanced it this door had: +2 ac a spell bonus action of shield for another +2 ac then we added spikes so it did 4d10 bluggining damage and it casted magic missile each time it hit. My friend had multi attack and could attack multiple times this door also had +11 to hit and +7 to damage. It got its name well earned.

[@marcusbrewer1197]

Not a weapon, but I once made a fishing rod out of a club and the string from a broken crossbow so that I could get a fish and use it to intimidate and sweet-talk someone into buying it for 10 platinum. Then later in the campaign I cought a pufferfish, someone offered my character (a hopeless alchoholic) a drink. I threw the pufferfish behind me and dm said to roll for aim. Nat 20. Said to roll a d8 for damage. I rolled an 8 and accidentally killed a man with a pufferfish.

[@SorenMaelstrom]

Half a Cultist... Yep, my Barbarian had attacked a cultist with an overhead swing of my axe, and I crit. DM explained, how the Person was split in half from head to pelvis straight through the middle. Attacking the black sphere in the middle of the cultists was a bad idea, as the axehead was destroyed. Now the Barbarian had no weapon, so he grabbed the leg of the halved cultist and used him as a flail. DM even rolled for Fear effect, as even cultists do not often see one half of one of their brethren being swung overhead raining down innards everywhere.

[@EpicSteve23]

I was a Goliath barbarian with the entertainer background, so I had a musical instrument proficiency I choose guitar cause it's a primarily a combat themed one-shot probably never come up. We proceed to be swarmed by a massive quantity of flaming exploding skeletons that were vulnerable to bludgeoning and resistant to slashing and piercing. So what is a man without magic, or proper bludgeoning implements to do? Elementary Geb " Bearbreaker" Galanodel pulled his trusty guitar off his back and when full El Kabong on some skeletons. Later he put a undead frost giant in a submission hold while repeatedly hitting it in the groin, but that's a story for another day

[@DualGamerProdigy]

A jar of mayonnaise. No, I will not elaborate.

[@matesdostal5208]

Thank you, somebody actually pointed out the fact that you can use swords for bludgeoning damage

[@lockwoan01]

"Can I punch him?" Ambushed in an alleyway - two thugs behind Dwarf Paladin and Bugbear Artificer and Orc Fighter - and a third shot the dhampir tabaxi rogue in the back as the rogue tried to chase the higher leveled threat, letting that target escape. Fighter, paladin and artificer kill one thug, and forced the second to surrender. Fighter gets out longbow, and goes after the third thug, who has come close to killing the dhampir, who is alive due to drinking blood. Artificer uses Vine Whip, and starts dragging the thug towards them - here comes Opportunity Attacks. Rogue makes his with a rapier. Then the thug is dragged by the Fighter. Fighter knows that he'd have disadvantage with a bow at this range, so he goes, "Can I punch him?" Yep - 4 points of damage. By the time the thug is dragged to the artificer, that thug is dead.

[@marcusreading3783]

A pink bunny rabbit being thrown at a dragon by a goliath Fighter. Of course, said rabbit was also a four foot tall, very sweary Monk who proceeded to kick the dragons face in. And nearly got stepped on. So, to add to the idea of using the sword hilt as a blunt weapon, knights would actually flip their swords and grip the blades to do it. See, if the blade cant move, it wont cut, so they were at no risk of cutting their hands open, in addition to the fact they'd be wearing thick gloves. The reason they did that was because armour is great at defending against slashing damage, not so much against bludgeoning.

[@postapocalypticnewsradio]

PANR has tuned in.

[@korith5732]

Ah tim...that was an amazing game session...too bad that camp ended but luckily we started another and have just as many laughs

[@archellothewolf2083]

i once killed a lich with his own house. tavern brawler, 3 instances of x2 carry weight, and two 3rd level smites with extra attack. after what myparty had done to it already, the lich did not get another turn.

[@kiarastardust]

A jar of bees. My dm let me have them as improvised wepons. Surprisingly effective. I also broke the dm after one session with the jars. I also accidently almost killed a party member as they where allergic to bees.

[@MasterElements]

That sorcerer improvised a spell focus and cast iron on the white dragon.

[@ajh22895]

That golem story reminds me of the lake battle with the ballista and the cat 2 krasis.

[@OMGSAMCOPSEY]

When all else fails fling your poop for poison and/or psychic damage

[@BrianVaughnVA]

So fun fact, kind of? Some ancient cultures would dip their spears and arrows in deification, fish/pig blood, or other bodily fluids (primarily shit though) in order to infect wounds and cause the plague. They would also use human heads as rounds in catapults and trebuchets for psychological warfare AND because if they BIT anyone - they'd pass on the plague.

[@puddel9079]

I have a couple improvised weapons stories, one I was there for, the other is a story I heard. A vorpal serving fork, no I am not kidding. The party's dedicated dwarf cleric chose to use this damn fork in combat after getting it identified, causing our dwarven *fighter*/cleric to be continually pincushioned by arrows because of these antics. I never got confirmation but I'm pretty sure that it would only decapitate dead poultry. My first true dungeon crawl the party unwittingly pilfered joke items from a small hoard, this was one of them. Then, bricks. My dad had been in a bad D&D session where the DM wanted to one-up the party for some reason. The ranger had to chase down a knight on horseback. He ends up at the castle, and realizes something horrible. After losing his bow and the enemy wizard intercepting his sword throw, the ranger only had a dagger and 20 arrows to fight with. He got imprisoned and worked a brick free from a wall. 3 nat 1's later (AD&D has players roll low for success, it's as jarring it sounds), and three guards are knocked out. The DM rules that the ranger is now proficient with bricks.

[@Yourlibrarian]

I did not expect a Mystery Men reference in this. But I am so happy there was one.

[@Noobygamer_OCE]

I used a baby sheep chucking at a stone giant 😂 Btw I rolled a nat 20 and killed it instantly

[@arinomaly]

i yeeted my pet mimic at an opponent. it was highly successful. boberto is his name.

[@kylethomas9130]

Been waiting on a campaign to use it, but I have a Kobold Rune Knight, Strength Fighter build I wanna use. Tavern Brawler feat, max strength, then start using enemies as Thown Weapons.

[@sleepybeef2412]

I've had a few in my time as a player. 1. A cut down totem pole (mechanically a 1d10 reach weapon that does bludgeoning damage). It was connected to the goliath character's backstory. 2. We were fighting a gorgon in the basement of a bar. I took the strongest alcohol they had, made an improvised molotov cocktail and threw it at the gorgon's eyes so that we could fight without having to worry about eye contact. 3. The corner of a stone wall. I was playing a barbarian with powerful build and enlarge cast on them. Picked a guy up by his feet and swung his head into the corner of a stone wall.

[@anthonyfilshie1002]

One I have been going back and forth on making better to a friend is actually pretty elaborate but can break a game… at least I think it could. Back in our beginning years or so of playing pathfinder, I made this moveable Rune that could make magic traps wherever it was placed on the ground and taken off. After really toying with it, we have this lovely item. A scroll printer. Literally a printer. I’ll use “the scroll of f’ you” (fireball) as a starting point on how insane this could get. You collect a handful of specific easy to locate items. Get a handful of broken metal bits from the smithy. Ink for the alchemist to create a powerful magic effect matching the school. (For this say condensed evocation magic ink.) a sea sponge to hold the magic inks. And said scroll. You get the metal to mimic the ink work on a spell, sponge to drop the ink into the open areas, and when it comes out, you have an exact PRINTED copy. Now scribe scroll doesn’t have a spell level limit in pathfinder. You just need the template to the magic you want to create… so you could literally print out level 9 spells at just the casting cost. Would this be Broken? Very. Is this Fun? Not for the rest of the universe. TL/DR: trap printer rune has given inspiration to create a printer from broken parts that can break the game.

[@vatusia]

I was running a mythic campaign in Pathfinder. The opposing NPC villain party had a half ogre barbarian that had the ability to multiply his carrying capacity by a factor of 50. Their last stand against the PCs, he hulked out and grabbed the parties cart and horse, swung it overhead,, then slammed in onto two party members. Horse didn't make it but the party succeeded their reflex save for half. They knew he was strong and called shenanigans until I showed them the math. Their shock and the laughter around the table made it all worth it.

[@Bagon97]

Recently we had a hilarious situation regarding impovised weapons - we were playing our custom Warcraft system. My character was battling a bear-shark hybrid in the arena and I was extremely unlucky with my rolls. I was seriously afraid my character would die, and my teammates in the audience too. One of them asked a GM, if she can throw a tomato at the beast, booing him from the crowd. He said yes, and she rolled a 1 (in d100 system, so even lower chance than in D&D). She rolled max damage, and hit him for more than I was able to hit for 3 turns. He decided, that the bear-shark would also be stunned from the impact. Definitely ruled this so I could win, but rolling a one and then max damage had us all laughing!

[@TwoHeadedMeerkat]

9:21 _"I'd like to see you beat THIS dead horse!"_

[@deviantgazer4626]

In the first one-shot I ever did, my best friend played a rouge. His character was a kleptomaniac (I know, big shocker) but was one who stole the strangest items. We were "invited" to a dinner party at a castle, to which hs decided to steal a silver-lined ornate punch bowl. He did so by dumping the contents into another character's mouth, then proceeded to wear the punch bowl over his head like a makeshift hat/helmet. Proceed to one of the fights near the end of the session, the same rouge ended up cornered by one of the top minions of the lord of the castle (who was a vampire). In a moment of fearful desperation, the rouge used the punch bowl and smacked it across the head of the minion. He rolled so high that not only did it do damage, but it also stunned the minion. I dont remember the full explanation as to why but it ended up with the minion laid unconscious on the ground, with the rouge holding up the punch bowl and yelled "This bowl packs a punch!"

[@captain_hammer]

COW DAMAGE

[@spront8297]

In a campaign with one of my more absurd characters, I rigged up 14 guns to shoot at the same time, then for a large table with swords and pitchforks and torches. I lured out a "legendary werewolf creature" with a dead body, then activated both traps, dropping a Flaming sword table on to him, then shooting him 14 times, which lured out the villagers, with whom my level 5 wizard beat a werewolf which turned out to be Malar, god of the hunt to death.

[@trueblueflare]

Mine was in a modern day-zombie apocalypse campaign, the zombie virus was caused by a kind of incredibly powerful stimulant drug, my character took old syringes often found near zombies (bc the stimulant drug), smashed them, and used shards of broken glass as shivs and projectile weapons. Also weaponized the stimulant itself a few times, even taking massive risks and using it on myself in dire circumstances.

[@idkwhatmynameis2463]

Not sure if this counts, but I'm playing the mad mage. Anyway, I turned my hand into an Iron Man gauntlet. Now let me explain, so we were walking through the dungeon and come across a glowing sword stuck in a training dummy. A skeleton hand still attached to the blade. Now, our party is mainly chaotic evil, as such we all wanted to grab the sword. Now originally, I wanted to see what this sword does, but once I saw everyone else reaching for it. Weeeeeeell, it's mine now. Anyway, once I grabbed the sword the skeleton hand that was previously there broke into a bunch of dust. Now, it was permanently cursed to my hand. Now you might be thinking, well it can't be all that bad! It's at least glowing so it has to do something! You'd be right! It did do something, it glowed. That's it. I had the equivalent of a giant flashlight that I wasn't proficient with (It was a long-sword). What's worse, is that I'm an Artificer. I use a gun. I've already made a flashlight attachment. A better one at that actually! I grabbed the sword with my firing hand, so I lost proficiency with my gun. I was crippled. So we went back to the surface and went to see if I could get the curse removed, since no one else in the party thought it'd be useful to have the spell. Anyways, once on the surface, I was offered 500 platinum pieces for the sword. As such, I cut my hand off and promptly became rich. But that's not why you're reading this, you're reading this to find out how I became a rip off Iron Man! Well it's simple really, I went and bought a chunk of Adamantium and turned it into a hand. I made a little space in the center for my eldritch cannon to sit, turned the pointer finger into a flashlight, the middle a knife, the index is used to cast grease, the pinky has a lighter in it, and the top of my hand now has a tiny crossbow in it. It's been quite fun! I plan on turning my dog named Bacon into a moving ballista here soon-

[@codycannon2775]

Had a half orc barbarian that liked to use bandit heads as weapons. They would run into battle with 3-4 heads and throw them one at a time at the nearest enemy or hold a head by the hair and use if for melee. Yes they would also rage

[@GymbalLock]

I ran a tabletop skirmish game where US Navy Seals were attacked by ancient Assyrian skeleton warriors. The player was able to start up a heav truck and simply drive over the skeleton warriors.

[@jakobrandall2293]

A bucket. Playing a fallout 5e conversion, myself (a regular human) and out Supermutant scientists were taking cover at the entrance to a raider controlled building, we needed something to take out the dug in raiders as they thought we were a full mutant raiding party. That’s when we asked if there was a bucket. We took said bucket and filled it with the powder from all the .38 bullets we had, we then topped it with all the bullet tips, casings and rocks. We then proceeded to chuck this bucket of death into the front door after lighting a fuse we made, and dove for cover as the resulting explosion nearly took the entrance down

[@KorenKorca]

My current character is a swashbuckler rogue who lost his leg prior to the campaign. Gave up sailing due to ptsd acting up whenever he hears something similar to a cannon firing, such as an explosion or a fireball going off. Once he's triggered he just goes off the rails, taking off his wooden leg and clubbing his enemies over the head with it. DM ruled he moves at half speed in this state, owing to being down to one leg, but I just rolled with it. Picture if you will: a one legged pirate hopping towards you one one leg, swinging a wooden leg wildly at anything in reach, screaming like a banshee and foaming slightly at the mouth. Since half of the time he can't reach the second enemy after clubbing the first one to death, I tend to use my action to try to intimidate enemies into fleeing from his crazed visage. The first time, though, I described it so vividly the dm didn't even bother asking me to roll intimidation and just ended combat as the bandits fled in terror. She now rules that any nat 20s I roll on this check end in the same result. Once he reaches level 6 I plan to take a few levels in barbarian. What subclass? What else? Berserker.

[@RottNPhaze]

One campain i was in way back in 3.5 i was playing the rat race from oriental adventures being attacked by a swarm of rat our half ogrer cant remember fighter or barbarian grabbed the nearest thing to save his friend. Grabbed another member and started flailing around to smash them other members failed saved miserably so got ripped out a bear trap lossing an leg then losing an arm from the attack sending him flying. Good time should also mention we where almost all chatoic aligned one way or another

[@xXFireFrostGamingXx]

Not to much of a weapon, but my party used my gnome wizard as a grappling hook, by tying a noose (yea a noose) around me, and lobbing me in the middle of a field of magical sleep flowers to grab a npc in the center of it

[@jettblade]

I ran a homebrewed Jade Claw game, were the inhabitants are animal-people. The setting was a post-apocalyptic ancient China. I made custom monsters for it and one of the more interesting monsters were Penta-rillias. They were giant apes with four arms and a single large leg. They were extremely strong and intelligent. During the fight one of the Penta-rillias grappled one of the PCs and attempted to block another PC's attack using the grappled PC as an improvised shield. The attacking character was swinging for a crap ton of damage because he min-maxed a beat stick elephant man. Unfortunately the grappled PC was a walrus man, a custom race made for that particular player, was the heaviest character. I fumbled on the block check causing the Penta-rillia to pull several muscles and taking the attack straight to the face. So long story short I once used a PC as a human shield against another PC.

[@sterlinggecko3269]

totally forgot my orc barbarian (I was the DM), using 'The Stone of Destiny ' a rock with Greater Magic Weapon cast on it. he was throwing it and bouncing off targets like Captain America's shield. my players remembered it years later when a module's NPC started doing something similar.

[@DHTheAlaskan]

My fighter would (with permission) punt the gnome rogue towards larger enemies. It worked so well the DM started adding velocity die damage to enemies the rogue would impact with.