What Is a Story You Have Been Dying to Tell?

[@kayq3231]

That first story is one of the few believable, "and everyone laughed," stories I've heard.

[@Elyseon]

If it had happened today, somebody would have called the cops on the guy.

[@TheCaptainFatBelly]

@@Elyseon no

[@prayingmantisvideos227]

@@TheCaptainFatBelly yeah they would have

[@TheCaptainFatBelly]

@@prayingmantisvideos227 I mean not really, pretty much every guy is understanding enough to see the reasoning behind why the father did that. Just because you would, doesn't mean every guy would. But hey, I don't want to argue, so have a nice day my dude :)

[@prayingmantisvideos227]

@@TheCaptainFatBelly my bad, i didn't really think about that. have a nice day!

[@felicitybywater8012]

A creep tried to mug me under the railway bridge in Parramatta. It's a busy western suburb of Sydney. I was the only person under the bridge at the time. He did the menacing body language & voice thing, assuming he could frighten money out of me because I'm a woman. Very loudly, I said "I'm NOT going to give you any money". The 100+ people on the other side of the road stopped & stared. He could feel their eyes on his back. He twitched a few times, trying to look over his shoulder w/out taking his eyes off me. But them staring at him & me staring at him in an unfriendly manner did him in. He ran away & we all carried on*. * Australians are pretty English about just carrying on once it's all over.

[@UncleMikeDrop]

I was cringing in anticipation of a much worse outcome for the OP of the "Is that your pee pee?" story.

[@CarinaCoffee]

Having studied abroad in China and been asked by random strangers to be in their photos that one story hit differently. The world truly is a village sometimes...

[@jakevex4198]

The Frank Sinatra story just just made me bust out laughing

[@AnnoyingNerdLoL]

My (now ex) girlfriend and I we're at a small ice cream shop, the shop happen to be right in front of the end of a golf driving range. While we were eating we heard a loud knock on the roof of the ice cream shop, we looked and it was a golf ball that somehow managed to get over the net of the driving range. It bounced off the roof, it bounced kind of close to us, and it bounced one more time, mind you it has a lot of air because of how fast it was coming in. And I shit you not, at the end it bounced into the open window of a car and hit the guy sitting at a red light, I am not kidding. It was literally the funniest thing I have ever seen.

[@fjLKA]

At summer camp, I volunteered (I was a senior camper) serving ice cream to the entire summer camp of about 600 kids, plus staff. It was organized by groups of 10 or so, so each group had to make it to the cafeteria for ice cream ON TIME. After serving everyone (chocolate sauce, sprinkles and all), we who served the ice cream sat and ate the leftovers, since there was no freezer to store what was left. There was so much ice cream and sauce that it wouldn't be safe to actually eat your share. I remember standing in the bathroom, filling my mouth, and spitting it into the sink, just so I could have more. As we cleaned up our disgraceful mess, one final group of about 10 little kids (and about 3 very unlucky counselors) arrived for their ice cream way late. We basically told them "sorry, no ice cream. We ate it all." It's been 17 years. Even now as I sit here typing, I wonder how those counselors did damage control with those boys.

[@therealskull4786]

Yesterday, me and some friends went to McDonalds at midnight on bikes & longboards (we cant drive). My hands were cold as shit but braved it all the way. When we got to Mickey Dees. we tried the drive-thru since the main store was closed. One friend ordered on his phone and we pulled up to the second window on our non-motor vehicles. Behind us was some old ass dude who looked like Teddy Roosevelt. We left the line, ate, and rode to a gas station for snacks n shit. We drove by a red pickup pulled over by the sheriff and guess who it was. The old ass dude.

[@brettlarch8050]

My 7 year old nephew and I were challenging each other to imitate voices or impression. I told him to imitate the voice of nerd and he responded with “So your voice then?”

[@Em-hm8uy]

That first one is *hilarious*

[@castielsgranny4308]

Questioning a midwife who tells expectant late-term mom to take a warm bath….

[@jamiejusthappenedtobehere2434]

The incompetent of the hospital staff was astounding

[@melissamorton220]

A warm, not hot, bath wont hurt her and at the end of pregnancy its not a huge concern as long as mobility isnt an issue

[@persianwaluigi1166]

This was only a few days ago. I was taking a Spanish test where we had to translate commands. One of the questions was to translate "Do not talk during the test". I forgot what "test" was in Spanish, so I wrote down "tarea extrema" which means "extreme homework".

[@summerb9113]

did you pass el tarea extrema?

[@dontworrydehappy7104]

The kind young man who helped the guy in the wheelchair - God bless you! You did what several others would not. I am so happy and impressed to hear such stories of our great youth! Our future is in great hands! ❤

[@r34p3r1992]

When I was a kid, I lived in what seemed to be a "farmland" but was quietly getting made into a small town, and 30 minutes away from my home was a "small wood" it wasn't bad, it was just cool distance for a kid One day we went into the wood and found an abandoned house and a destroyed jeep, me and my friend were having fun near the house. Then we heard a Soft yet angry yell "LEAVE!" and we saw no one - So we continued to play near it. Then we heard something loudly bang and we both scattered away. Our friends wanted to find the place but me and the other guy were refusing to go near it

[@kirtemoon529]

My dog wasn’t meant to be a house pet. He was born a research animal, and when the testing involving his pack was done, he and his fellows were given to a veterinary college to practice the basics on; blood pressure, nail clipping, etc. The school was able to teach him many things, but house-training was not one of those things. We got to meet him at the midpoint of December; me, my mum, and my sister… who’s afraid of dogs. He was a shy boy back then, even more than he is now. He sniffed each of us gently. He gave a ‘hug’ with his front paws on my shoulders to lick my forehead. After 10 minutes he rolled into my mum’s back. And after ~half hour with us, he needs to pee. So he does …right in the center of the room while making direct eye contact with my sister, who’s horrified and on edge since we got there. 😂

[@UncleMikeDrop]

The gumball machine story with the vouchers made the instrumental 'I Got A Golden Ticket song play in my head and that made me smile. RUN HOME, CHARLIE! 😁

[@snatchadams69]

That cop story was sad "I never got to go to mine."

[@tricorvus2673]

I had to go out and shovel the snow after a heavy storm, off the patio, so that our spoiled little dog could go outside and pee. I chose to wear my late dad's overlarge snowshoes. I came back inside, walked into the kitchen. Linoleum flooring. Slipped and fell into a perfect splits. Never before or since in my life. God I wish that we'd had a camcorder to capture that.

[@caiusreese9936]

I did the IB programme (International Baccalaureate) at my high school which is basically like your first year of university, but at the high school level it was a 2 year thing and on my final ever spanish exam I go in to do the oral portion with my teacher and on the table she has my entire pre-planned out practiced speech written out so all I had to do was read it out. Pretty sure that's considered cheating to have that much "help" in an exam so I winged portions of it so I didn't completely copy the version of my exam she had laid out. Me and the rest of my Spanish class all agreed never to tell anyone 'cause you know we could forfeit our exam results and mess up getting our diplomas. That teacher got fired a year or two later for teaching her 7th graders (11 year olds) all the curse words in Spanish and giving them homework on using them in sentences

[@SynapticBoomstick]

Person who gave up their flight seat, you're a legend.

[@StarrChild.]

It's a very small thing, but I went into my local pet store because I had accidently bought the wrong light for my lizard. The lovely woman who works there was being yelled at by an angry customer because he was trying to return something and had no receipt but he claimed the product was faulty. I fully believe if I wasn't also in the shop, and watching him like a hawk, he would have got physical. The guy left in a huff and I stayed and talked to the poor woman. she cried and i hugged her. I exchanged my light, went out to a bakery and bought doughnuts for the pet store lady. On my way back to the store I saw the guy again lurking a fair bit away, looking at the shop. A customer had just left the store and he walked up when he realised I was there, walking back to the store. I just stared at him, trying to get every detail of him and he awkwardly walked away. I went in and gave the feel better doughnuts the pet store then I went back outside and stood out of sight from the door. The guy tried to come back again, saw me and left again. He sort of waited at a bench near by then got really mad and got into a parked car and left. I stayed there for about an hour before I went back in, told the pet store what happened. Not a fantastical story, and I probably handled it wrong but it was all I could think of in the moment. I just never tell the story.

[@cannedmusic]

Grandma got run over by a Frankie...

[@Elyseon]

"Acting!"

[@sparrowflyaway]

One time I was down the street for something, can't remember exactly what, but as I crossed at the crossing I noticed a blind guy waiting on the other side, walking cane and all. I got about two steps past him and thought "he could probably use my help", so I turned around, stepped up beside him and asked if he needed a hand getting across the road. He seemed so relieved as he thanked me and took my elbow, and I helped him across to the other side of the road where he thanked me again before going on his way, at which point I crossed back over the crossing again and continued the way I was heading before that. somebody else nearby said they thought that was a really nice thing to do, but I really didn't think it was that big of a deal, just taking a minute out of my day to help someone who needed help. I don't often get to tell this story because it's not really something people care about or that you're able to bring up in conversation, but it made me feel good to have helped him 😊 plus I'm not the greatest at taking the initiative because I'm Autistic, so it's also a little bit of pride in myself for my brain actually recognising that he might need help and then realising that I'm someone who could offer that help.

[@lieked5903]

I used to stock shelves for a grocery store. In my country there were some health concerns about eggs at the time (something about stuff in chicken food that could transport to the eggs and cause cancer in humans, turned out to be fake I think), which caused eggs to be taken off the shelves. Stores were allowed to sell eggs again so I got the job of putting all the eggs on the shelf before the store opened. This went alright until I reached underneath the next box of eggs and I felt something wet and something move. I lifted the box and there were maggots and other insects chilling in the spot where an egg had broken. Me realizing I touched that freaked out and my collegue we was stocking the rest if the isle got a manager. He took the crate and the eggs box and brought it to the back, I was told to continue working. I did so but now grabbed the boxes from the sides. I found 2 more boxes like that and I refused to stock eggs for a while after that.

[@thedeejaeebee5babee]

That's mortifying. That's why I love gloves for all occasions.

[@madisonkupsky685]

That first one was amazing. Lol

[@tochie-ugorji2021]

The first story was HILARIOUS!

[@C4TC4T]

My aunt killed a deer with a shovel because she was mad it was eating her flowers

[@paulleckner8235]

Aunt just provided venison for the family and friends.

[@melissamorton220]

Old ladies are wild

[@jasminelav.332]

i'm 90% sure i accidentally stumbled across a drunk sex tape made by a major Kpop star. the video was a bit dim but the person in question has pretty distinct facial features that i haven't seen on other korean men too often. if it wasn't him, then it was someone who got plastic surgery to look almost exactly like him.

[@Slushiii6804]

Who?

[@adakolehmainen3251]

Oop- I don't know if you are saying what I think you are saying, but the first person I thought of was Oli London 💀 Hinting at the plastic surgery part

[@jasminelav.332]

@@adakolehmainen3251 getting surgery to look like a specific celebrity is sadly very common.

[@sepiatonia]

I'm so curious, which Kpop star would this be? 👀 Please do tell.

[@abfarrow3596]

I often have stuff that doesn't come up in conversation so I just say the most random things sometimes. As a result, my friend often says "Wow... who asked?" So I'm just waiting for next time, when I will be carrying confetti, and I will say "No one, but life is full of surprises!" And then I will throw the confetti at that friend. Or to not make a mess, a piece of paper that says "confetti."

[@swordofgallifrey6330]

27:09 I'm literally crying, that's horrible. I feel so bad for the dad.

[@rebekahsearcy8986]

Me, my neighbor and our bus driver helped up an old man outside a kidney dialysis center who sat in a chair that broke under him. I also helped a lady in a motorized scooter in Florida get a gallon of tea.

[@TaylorSaysHi]

27:43 this story brought tears to my eyes

[@fantasticalyt2558]

Me, my little brother, and his buddy, were playing video games one night. Had an airsoft pistol. Moth had been flying around and landing on our screens all night. Moth was flying around near the light in my room and i shot it out of the air and killed it. Amazing inside joke that nobody else will believe. Little brother saw it happen as well.

[@dorothylloyd1804]

Thanks for the stories

[@BeanKally]

One time my drama class teacher was eating lunch and offered me some. I was full, but since I hadn’t gotten much sleep my brain fused “I’m okay, thank you though!” And “I’m good” So I said “I’m gay, thank you though!” She choked on her food laughing 4 years later, I can confirm I am bisexual She was such a good teacher, thank you for putting up with me and my crazy friends Mrs. Lindsay!

[@DefinitelynotOsamaBinLaden]

Some of these are absolutely adorable

[@BigFineDoll]

The home delivery story has me weeping at the pure beauty and love...AWESOME JOB PAPA!!!! 🥰🥰🥰🥰

[@darkglacier9786]

There was a band thing where all 400 of us were on the practice field having a giant free for all water balloon fight. After all the coolers spread across the field ran out, the directors (who were participating) brought out a huge HUGE trash bin full of balloons and there was immediately a huge swarm of high school band kids (the athletic ones) all fighting each other to get balloons. I (a 130 lb 5’3 percussionist girl) dove in, fought through people for a couple seconds, and emerged with two balloons in beach hand, drenched in water and dripping pink face paint (all the percussion people were decking themselves out in pink), and laughing like a maniac. Then after all that i went to eat a blue ice pop that wasn’t frozen all the way and it exploded in my face. It was sticky.

[@mazc1358]

The story at 21:40 reminded me of something my friend told me when we were school kids. One day she absent mindedly pulled back a rubber band and let it go. It whizzed into the air and into the direct path of a passing fly, slicing it in half.

[@PrincessofPower84]

Okay, a lot of these stories are wholesome/funny. I especially love the first one and the prom one.

[@God-ld6ll]

Best story in the universe, and it is...

[@christinawallace960]

I thought Usher was trying to get cancelled 😅

[@evathecat9149]

I have probably 1000, but the most recent happened a few days ago. I just started reading ITGR on Webtoon and woke up one day thinking I was Scarlet. (The main character) Sleepy brain is a confusing thing. I finally came to my senses after probably 30 minutes when I saw my cat who looks nothing like the cat in the Webtoon. Somehow, I failed to notice the entire house not looking like the Webtoon.

[@kurtkieffer6305]

I Love the Frank Sinatra story!

[@peachesnmulder]

I helped the police catch a murderer.

[@jazzad]

Goldfishes can live up to 15 years. They only die soon because of all the abuse they get from their owners.

[@keringtoncondron7273]

Backround: i have awful eyesight, so i wear glasses. i really take some time to find cute ones and i had just gotten a new pair. in my school there were a lot of people with glasses Story: in 7th grade, i was walking in the hall and i passed a girl and he friend. the following convo ensued: Girl 1: WhErE iS eVeRyBoDy GeTtInG tHeSe DAMN EyEgLaSsEs? I wAnT SoMe!!!!!! Me, glancing over my shoulder: the EYE DOCTOR. (i said this while looking at her like she was nuts.) Girl 2:...... did you hear what she said? bravo girl 2, for hearing that perfect comeback.

[@davecullins1606]

I was told I was never going to make it in uni because I read as fast as I speak - I finished my degree in 5 years, like you're supposed to, while the average student spends 6 - 6.5 years on it

[@god.loves.u]

the story i never get to tell cause its shameful xD. My brother has a crush on this girl he is in collage with and he asks to go fix her car one weekend. He wanted me to meet her and see why he likes her so much. We go to her house and she lives with her brother who is deaf. I start whispering the worst possible deaf people jokes i can to my brother and he elbows me and says shut up. I smile evily and say "what....what is he gonna do? /hear me/?" me and my brother burst out laughing for like five minutes gettting weird looks by this girl he likes and shortly after we leave. We laughed all the way home it was wrong of me but hey thats just how me and my brother are we always are telling dark jokes and carrying on when we used to hang out. Lol i repent from telling jokes like that though

[@Loki_Trickster]

Bet your going to feel like shit when you realize most deaf people can lip read extraordinarily well even if your not directly facing them even from across the room. And that he probably told the sister the moment you were out of the room.

[@alisterfolson]

That one time my friend ate a girl out who unbeknownst to him had a yeast infection. He was sick for a week. 😀

[@jenniferh.7219]

17:00 Uvalde deja vu

[@DKLovely34]

The fish story made me think of Lilly potter

[@weirdanimations76]

This isn't nearly as insane as some in the video but here I go: One time during PE around 5th grade , we were just chilling outside in the hot weather. I randomly chucked a basketball backwards, and not a moment later I heard one of my friends shout. I managed to nail him right in the head. Everyone in my friend group just lost it

[@_the_swamp_monster3363]

One time in school we were Learning about Romeo and Juliet and I absolutely hate Romeo and Juliet and one time the teacher asked “who wants to fight Romeo” and I said “me” and everyone started laughing and I’ve been riding that high ever since

[@leoqu1nn]

Nobody: Narration: ˢᵗᴬʳᵇᵘᶜᵏˢ

[@61936]

Apparently at my school someone was running from the principal and got arrested to add on top of that they were dressed as Spider-Man I can’t confirm any of this to be true but I’m hoping it is

[@nuclearhamster]

Yes

[@honorb4glory606]

Killed a squirrel with a machete just to see if I could. The only person who believes me is my dad, because he saw it. I scared the squirrel up an apple tree near some bushes. I put the machete in my teeth and climbed up to make him jump from the tree, knowing he'd go for the bushes. I was ready to jump out of the tree the second he did. I intercepted his escape path at about a 30 degree angle, and dove with the machete, chopping his head off. The machete stuck in the ground, causing the body to come to an instant stop against it, and the head kept going. It rolled several feet, right up to the edge of the bushes. It was pretty awesome. I BARELY got him, and found out the next day that I tore a quadracept doing it. Most likely when I jumped out of the tree. Even though doing that to a squirrel is a douche maneuver, I'm still proud doing something that's virtually impossible, and doing it with perfect accuracy.

[@amoeba7875]

i can relate to the one about the person who ended up in a bunch of family pictures in china (minus the marriage part lol). me and my family went there when i was younger to adopt my now brother. before we went to shanghai, we stayed in beijing for sightseeing and people kept asking my dad for pictures. i'm in some too and we say that he's probably on someone's mantle or something haha

[@Someone-dq4zt]

The first one reminds me of when i used to shower with my dad when i was little and one day i asked him what it was and if it was something i don’t remember what my mum told me after that i never showered with my dad bc it was too awkward lmao

[@castielsgranny4308]

Pretty-much textbook First Aid given in a first rate manner!

[@UncleMikeDrop]

That is no excuse. Lots of people look the same from behind so be a little less punk rock about from the back shows of affection.

[@graham2631]

To the person hacking the guy who delivered his daughter. If you read the caption it says "story your dying to tell" so I think he's justified.

[@badger6882]

these are actually kinda sweet

[@BinbrookPaintball]

The story of my demise

[@un1qu3fr3ak]

aww someone find that gay cop and give him a hug or smth

[@jayceewilliams5250]

sounds like they saved a ton of money on a at home birth and that the midwife sent them off lol

[@nicolem3215]

4:38 Ha!

[@airrreekayjones28]

The first story was weird to me and I seem to be the only one who thinks so 🥴

[@snook6661]

Yea I thought so too....

[@MarcHendry]

26:30 how bad do you have to be to be "insanely unattractive" lol

[@kytsunman8592]

I call industrial level of bullshit on the frank Sinatra story

[@idkmanlol1485]

14th*

[@RedneckSwede]

Can imagine the embarrassment after the husband grabbed the wrong pair of boobies. Family gathering conversations will be epic. Grandma: "So how was the Vegas trip?" Husband: "Oh, it was amazing, exciting and perky." Grandma: "What?" Husband: "What?"

[@smartchip]

25:02 12/19, you yanks are so stubborn, you guys cannot just change your nutty way of noting aka organising the date, just like the imperial system, which was from the UK, even the UK gave it up, because its antiquated, Day month year NOT month day year

[@michelewalburn4376]

Oh no. Nothing can change. The white wing evangelical Godists lose their collective brain cell every time we try to change even the simplest thing. We're evil, devil worshipping communists if we try to improve anything, or do anything that will help everyone.

[@wmeuse2375]

There are two types of countries in the world, country that use the metric system and countries that have landed people on the moon or are named Liberia or Myanmar. But no one cares about them. Also cool bit of Trivia the shop that was taking the metric system to the us was sunk by pirates so the system never showed up.

[@smartchip]

@@wmeuse2375 landed on the moon because of the science, which is on the metric system, micro, nano, peco,mega, etc, measurements in the scale of metric, then converted to imperial, where applicable or needed, Fact alot of the computing / processing power went on conversion of metric to imperial,

[@wmeuse2375]

@@smartchip NASA started using the metric system in the 1990. If I remember correctly that conversation was identified as one of the reasons for the loss of the space shuttles. Would need to go back and find a source though.

[@smartchip]

@@wmeuse2375 its common knowledge in Engineering circles, but yes, thank you for contributing to the conversation and for your pertinent information,

[@bennette.7033]

jesus loves you

[@khulaniafrost8359]

First story, I thought he was going to say he whipped it out and pee'd into one of the baby's diapers.

[@Barcilior]

First comment.

[@michelewalburn4376]

🍪

[@fuggetaboutit5153]

First comment is gay

[@michelewalburn4376]

A comment is not a sentient being. Therefore it can not feel any emotion and can't possibly be happy. Now people who often say other people/things are gay usually do it to make themselves appear heterosexual when they're struggling with their homosexuality. Just facts.

[@fuggetaboutit5153]

@@michelewalburn4376 "First comment" is the name of my gay lover. Just facts

[@guessan154]

First story wholesome check 🥹💗