What Is The UK's Worst Brewed Lager? , We Take A Look At 9 Fake UK Brewed European & World Lagers

[@limmoblack]

This is like being a designated driver watching your mate getting pissed.

[@Goonerboy-mz1ey]

Worryingly he probably only drank about a pint 🥴

[@DaveBloke-tg5wv]

Ha ha, and slowly watching everyone start talking bollocks!

[@caeserromero3013]

On Fosters? How old is your mate? 6? 😂😂

[@garrz32]

🤣

[@TheAmericanDane]

I’d rather be the designated driver than get drunk on any of that sh*te

[@adtoa2865]

There was a story in Australia about the lorry driver who was delivering 10;000 bottles of fosters to an outback pub. The lorry broke down in the middle of nowhere in 40 degree heat with no shade. The driver was rescued after a nightmare 7 days. None of the bottles had been opened as he had survived by drinking his own piss.

[@GeorgeSmith1066]

😂😂😂😂

[@SW-ok8qr]

Is that supposed to be a joke? Of course, Only a fool would drink alcohol in heat.. 😂😂😂😂😂

[@gartshorescott]

Tennents....its not even 'beer' !

[@SW-ok8qr]

@@gartshorescott what is it then tea or coffee?

[@richardwadd9769]

In Australia it would be a truck. No one here says lorry.

[@elee6157]

Carling will always be my worst. Brewed with depression

[@discostoo]

"Brewed with depression extract" - not even the real fucking thing.

[@pskourides]

Thx for ur comment, nicely put :)

[@drewtatt6487]

Carbonated piss

[@waylingtons]

Carling comes with fag ash readily tapped into the can.

[@stepheng8779]

Fosters every time

[@timbert4672]

Just in case you foreigners are wondering, Carling and Fosters are only popular in the UK because people wash their cars with it.

[@westie0113uk]

Don't be so stupid....... People use Glen's vodka to wash their cars

[@timbert4672]

@@westie0113uk That’s used for cleaning the engines and components during rebuilds, it’s especially handy with old carburettor engines as since it is already classified by the automotive regulatory agency as industrial grade starting fluid.

[@dinkyman8591]

Glucose syrup in beer? Yuk😝

[@methanedirigible]

@@westie0113uk Glen’s vodka is amazing tbf. It will cut through anything. Grease, oil, stomach lining. It’s a miracle liquid.

[@alexflorin6740]

Carling was good for beginners. Boosted your confidence at drinking a lot without getting drunk 🤣🤣

[@andrewward7168]

He's definitely finishing them all off then waking up at 3am on the kitchen floor cuddling the remnants of a donner kebab 😂

[@hoilst265]

He definitely did the video chapters after necking all of these.

[@RandallSlick]

It's always a surprise how marketeers have completely exploited the Brits' complete disinterest in quality. What saps we are. Dismal.

[@ArtyFactual_Intelligence]

Brexit voters.....

[@thefyrdman]

@@ArtyFactual_Intelligence Really? You think it's Brexit voters who find slapping some European branding on something allows them to pass over quality? Get lost. I never found a single Remain voter who could tell me about the EU institutions or how they operated, but ohhhh those European vibes man; who cares about power being diffused away from the people when being in the EU makes me feel part of something continental!

[@hmu05366]

@@thefyrdmanyeh it’s been proven. People who voted to leave are less intelligent lol

[@smythharris2635]

​@@ArtyFactual_Intelligencefound the chattering class brit..... 😅 love from Ireland.sláinte

[@smythharris2635]

That didn't stop Madonna or Lady Gaga selling millions either😅

[@EddieSpaghettiFN2]

If ever a man was “taking one for the team” it’s right here, drinking 9 beers purely for public interest. Legend status unlocked 🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺🍺

[@qpruleok5798]

What you on about he gave Madri, glucose syrup and all an 8 mark not that long ago, he never mentioned glucose syrup in it then 😂😂😂 I can not stand any of those shite lagers and there additives. Craft ales, bitters, ipa, stouts for me

[@TheRflynn]

Like watching a review of nil all draws

[@jonjames7328]

Are you sure the UV (UVA) light traveling through the green glass of the Stella bottle gives the hops a “skunky “ taste? Thanks for your research btw.

[@davidhathaway8271]

Absolutely what a hero! But someone had to do it! Cheers

[@peterluundgren36]

He ended up 'looking at the microwave on the clock' 😂

[@toucantex]

Madri is the worst, just for the fact it isn’t Spanish or ever has been. It’s a completely made up lager only ever brewed in the uk

[@chrishope9068]

Brewed in Tadcaster. Truly awful stuff!

[@qpruleok5798]

He gave Madri an 8 mark not that long ago 😂😂😂 with its glucose syrup too ??????

[@chris6796]

Madri is shite for sure

[@TheKevtro101]

Interesting to find out it's actually carling of old 🤔

[@stupossibleify]

So? I don't give a damn about the country of origin

[@paulsawtell3991]

What a waste of time. I have a true story about Stella, back in the 80s I managed a pub which had Stella lager. There were six chaps who'd come in and drink it three times a week. One evening one of them brought it back to me at the bar saying it didn't taste right. I declined his offer to taste it but offered him a refund or another drink. However the day after I phoned our cellar service where the chap said: "Oh, complaining about the taste are they?" I said: "You know something". He told me there had been a problem at the UK brewery so they'd been importing the real stuff from Belgium.

[@maxfrere4871]

😂😂😂

[@martifingers]

@@maxfrere4871 Wonderful story.

[@GavinAtkin]

lol!

[@timbert4672]

@@paulsawtell3991 That’s a good one! Real Belgian water source, not some bleached tap water from the UK.

[@cooldood37]

Lived in Belgium , never drank Stella, jupiler is the most popular lager there.

[@gstephenson9442]

Marketing this brown water to remind you of your cheap package holiday at a Spanish resort full of Brits. Truly the quintessential British drink

[@mattp7136]

This is the equivalent to comparing different types of animal piss.

[@Manos-de-Piedra]

😅

[@ArtyFactual_Intelligence]

I bow to your experience in these matters.

[@Ultraviolet13]

🤣🤣🤣 and the winner is ... 🦘

[@lesliehart]

at least you know which are diabetic

[@andydavies5817]

Best comment yet!! PMSL!!

[@analogdistortion]

It's a damn shame that in most sports / lager pubs nowadays you can't even find one decent lager on tap

[@edstar7894]

@analogdistortion Down south some ok ones fro fake ‘craft brewers’ have crept in. Camden lager and Beavertown Lager for example. You don’t see carling or foster for example, much at all.

[@analogdistortion]

@@edstar7894 I don't like any of the beers you've mentioned. It would just be nice if there was a decent lager on at the lager style sports pubs. They could just serve one lager from a decent Czech or German brewery.

[@looney7022]

I used to be a bar/cellar manager of a Scot&Newcastle pub in the mid 90s that sold Becks on draught, they bought whitbreads out and I cried when we had to change it to Kronenberg

[@ArtyFactual_Intelligence]

Watch the footie at home with a bottle of Fullers Golden Pride for £3

[@user-zy9yg2eu5t]

Stella is delish you're a mug

[@madkeithpet5892]

I used to drink Stella back in the 1970's. It was then imported by Whitbread's and had a beautifully floral smell to it and you got the occasional piece of hop in your glass from the dryhopping that they gave it in the cask. It was strong too, five pints and you probably wouldn't be making work in a fit state the next day. Nowadays it's just an OK lager.

[@stevel9914]

Had a mate who worked at Whitbread as a chemist.... in the late 80's/90's he was part of a group of chemists tasked with speeding up the brewing process of stella whilst matching the taste. I wonder what chemicals they added and filtered to attempt that objective

[@Wimpleman]

They weakened the recipe and it's nowhere near as nice. I feel like the unfiltered version is more similar to old school Stella

[@philandrews100]

When is the book coming out? I'll buy it! 🙂

[@hewittjohn]

The old 5.2% steller is still available and it’s the best. Just hard to find.

[@albo2591]

@@hewittjohnavailable where? Where have you most recently found it?

[@garyhart6421]

Black Label was always metallic to me. "What's the difference between Bud Light and sex in a canoe? They're both f***ing close to water." America even adds Sugar to their Bread.

[@davelister2961]

Yep. UK white bread is c. 5g of sugar per slice, American white bread is c. 15g of sugar per slice. It's basically cake.

[@lpatterson5005]

So do we

[@The_Original_Geoff_B]

As the pump in my favourite pub says - "It's lager. It tastes like lager". Small wonder the six hand pumps of real ale are always much busier.

[@lpatterson5005]

Isn't real ale flat though and stronger?🤮

[@petethompson3510]

What do you wanna bet that after filming, he picks an argument with a neighbour or maybe a random piece of kitchen equipment.

[@olinpaul]

If it's the neighbours playing that shite music he's well within his rights.

[@petethompson3510]

@@olinpaul That shite music is pretty shite

[@truthteller99999]

He'll put a vest on first.

[@MilesRudge]

All piss. Utter rubbish. If it's made by a major brewer and you drink it, your bonkers!

[@SkratchersOtherWorseChannel]

Can he tell the time?

[@looplil3044]

The sad thing is that most people won't see these as the worst beers in the UK, they'll genuinely see them as 'premium' beers! It's incredible how low people's standards have become.

[@PaulRandle-sc8qk]

The reality is that "premium" has nothing to do with quality. It now means "more expensive because it has to pay for a huge advertising budget".

[@kieranbarry8193]

they were always low :)

[@TheKevtro101]

They don't chase flavour , they just wanna get drunk

[@stupossibleify]

Surely what matters is your enjoyment of the beer

[@liampw20]

How many people consider carling or fosters premium?!!

[@neil1390]

I offered a homeless drunk,a can of Bud Light, and he said no thanks,I don't drink that piss!

[@noelmajers6369]

The original is hardly better (having spent a few years over there...). You know that mass brewing is in a bad place when it is brewing a shite version of a beer that was never that great to begin with. All of those reproduction beers are pretty appalling.

[@Spiritismo_]

Did you make that up?

[@jezzdavis9059]

If he was alcohol dependant, it'd be pointless. You'd want at least 7%.

[@TheLiamMurphy]

It's durt!

[@markrainford1219]

@@Spiritismo_ 😂 Even down and outs have standards.

[@paulf9487]

As Sean Lock referred to Carling, a driving beer.

[@TheKnobCalledTone.]

Fun fact: Fosters is a practical joke that Australia has played on the rest of the world for decades

[@arturobandini4078]

Much respect to you for drinking these cans of swill in one sitting.

[@GreggFellows]

that looks like a line up of the usual suspects suspected of a heinous crime

[@captainmeatsadventures7954]

The sad thing is Holsten Pils, Stella and even Bud used to be amazing beers when they imported them back in the late 80s and 90s

[@gazmix589]

yes lamot pils & kaltenberg too

[@Swans_And_Ducks]

I remember drinking Holston Pils in the late 90s until i couldn’t walk just to get a free ‘Oooo, suits you sir” T shirt in the local boozer.

[@stepheng8779]

​@@Swans_And_Ducksit's always been pi55

[@ivanamassivedump8715]

You can still get the imported Stella's here in Coventry but you have to go to an independent off licence.

[@burlatsdemontaigne6147]

Regular Holsten beer was very good too. Orange can. Used to see it on draught too.

[@pauldonohue7536]

Love my ipa's, NEIPA's and craft beer, yet i have a soft spot for a carling, or a Morreti on a hot day 🤷🏼‍♂️ But we (the UK) need to do far better with its lagers, the Czechs and Germans put us to shame, we do craft and ciders just as good as anyone, lagers? Poor

[@greyknightsrealm8251]

I've learned something from this, which is that it's glucose syrup that causes the bad hangovers. I never knew that. I'm an ale drinker really, but very occasionally I have been known to buy a bottle of Peroni, or similar and I've almost always woken up with a headache that often lasts the whole of the next day to some degree. I've always blamed "chemicals" in these lagers, but never really knew what they were. Sat here on my third bottle of Wye Valley HPA knowing that I'll be fine in the morning and yes, the ingredients don't mention any nasty stuff.

[@GilbertSyndrome]

The vast majority of hangovers are caused by dehydration.

[@lpatterson5005]

Peroni brewed in Italy I got from lidl doesn't mention glucose syrup?

[@davien8297]

Watching you get slowly sloshed and reviewing those rubbish beers is more entertaining than watching England at the euros 😀😀 Nice one Simon 👍🏻

[@jokesaside9207]

It still amazes me how you walk through Tesco and see people pick up a crate of carling…. It isn’t even any cheaper!

[@tobytroubs]

The power of Marketing

[@cactusdan94]

I think what it is, is that it is just ROUTINE for some people. For the past 25 years they have been just grabbing a crate of carling/fosters or whatever cheap crate they have on offer at the front of the shop, they probobly dont even go down the actual beer isle. Alot of people who started drinking in the 70s/80s and even 90s are like it. What i think it is, is back then, the supermarkets didnt have the massive selections we do now. It was probobly just a a small selection of cheap lagers, then a few different ales. My Dad loves trying all the "craft" beers, but even to this day, he just grabs a 4 pack of boddingtons or fosters, purely out of habit.

[@garyfowkes8794]

Washing piss water

[@GeorgeSmith1066]

I genuinely feel sorry for those people when I see them with their precious mega-pack of Carling. I love all kinds of booze but would rather never drink anything ever again than touch that stuff. Bloody awful!

[@apolloniusbeitsman5444]

Tes cooperates

[@gar6446]

My pet hate is formerly premium beers that have been moved downwards to fill a role in a conglomerates portfolio or line up usually after a take over or merger. Lowenbräu for example.

[@71simonforrester]

Hear hear

[@hmu05366]

😂😂😂❤

[@nathangamble125]

So we now have low brow Lowenbräu?

[@71simonforrester]

@@nathangamble125 That is hilarious, but unfortunately true. I loved Lowenbrau when I first started drinking beer

[@jetpigeon8758]

I have been drinking beer all my adult life, and I have tried all of the beers mentioned, and San Miguel is in my opinion the finest UK brewed Lager beer. Fosters and Carling are for non drinkers.

[@worldofenigma1]

Have you tried Freedom brewery? They do some lagers I think, and brewed in the UK/England. There is also West brewery I think based in Glasgow.

[@Twittler1]

Moretti was an old, high quality brewer in Italy. Heineken bought it, and the first thing they did was close Moretti’s two breweries. Ever since it’s ‘brewed’ in the Netherlands and the UK. It’s been decades since a single drop of Birra Moretti was produced in Italy. I like Czech lagers, but only the ones brewed in Moravia and Bohemia. I really liked Staropramen. Draught, can or bottle, all brewed in Czechia. One day, I got a few bottles, cracked open the first one, and it was disgusting. I knew immediately what the problem was - looked on the back of the bottle, and it was brewed in the UK. Thankfully, if you find it on keg, that’s still brewed in Czechia (I think). At home, Czech brewers still brew in accordance with the ‘Rheinheitsgebot’, the sadly now unenforceable German purity law. Holsten. I used to drink draught Holsten, the regular lager, in my local in the 1970s. It was brewed in Hamburg, and was delicious. Holsten Pils was also from Hamburg, but only available in cans or bottles, even in Hamburg! Like Carlsberg Special Brew, it was revolting, sweet and overly malty, and only drunk by those with no taste buds and determined to get pissed as fast as possible. They were both high ABV, the Carlsberg SB at around 9%, the Holsten Pils about 7%. In the pub one day, got my usual pint of Holsten, and it was horrible. I asked the cellarman about it, and he told me it was now brewed in the UK! I went back to Light and Bitter! Stella used to be lovely beer, I remember the ads in the 70s, extolling its slow maturation. It was six weeks! Then it disappeared for a while - I believe the brewery went bust, and it took a while for someone to take it over. It went to a big corp, and suddenly reappeared, with a strong marketing campaign. It was still 6%, but was nasty, and the premium price had gone. It now cost the same as all the other rubbish, and was brewed in the Netherlands and the pint I was drinking in the UK. It was from that time on that it started to get its horrible nickname, ‘wife-beater’. Not too long ago, there seemed to be an attempt to take it upmarket again to counter that name; I saw the ads extolling its long maturation time - one (1) week!!!! The only lagers I’ll buy on draught now in a pub are Budweiser/Buvar, Staropramen (for now), and Pilsner Urquell. Otherwise, it’s Draught Ale for me. At home, I’ll have B/B, PU, a few other imported Czech beers, beers from local Bavarian Rheinheitsgebot breweries (Augustinierbräu Helles Vollbier is a favourite), and, strangely, Carlsberg Export! I find its taste and mouth feel pleasing, with no unpleasant aftertaste. And yes, it’s brewed in the UK!!!! Now, if only I could find Fischer’s beer from France in the UK. That really is nice, again still brewed to Rheinheitsgebot rules by Bräurerie /Brasserie Fischer in Alsace; it’s a small family owned brewery. At least it was; I hope it’s still a thing!

[@RS-xq6je]

Theres still beers sold that claim they are brewed in accordance with it only x4 natural ingredients i think it claims

[@Twittler1]

@@RS-xq6je That’s right - water, malted barley, hops and yeast. Under that law, before it was overturned, any brew with any other ingredient(s) couldn’t be called beer in Germany without a modifier, ie; wheat beer, rice beer, etc, etc. Any brewer still claiming to brew in accordance with it that actually isn’t is committing a variety of consumer law offences.

[@RS-xq6je]

@@Twittler1 interesting thanks. At the moment I really like aldi rheinbacher 4.5% (but tastes higher) £3.50 for x4 500mls the price is right and for me it tastes better than the more pricey stuff. Used to love Stella but it's changed so much, I liked their unfiltered version for a while but now it just doesn't taste the same. I've always been picky with my beer

[@StraitKnopfler]

That's interesting. I'm not saying you're wrong but I remember very distinctly there being 330ml cans of Moretti that stated they were brewed in Italy. I recall it because I used to actively seek them out. I'm not sure if they're still available, but this was about two years ago. I agree that all bottles and 440ml cans I've seen say they are brewed in the UK. Edit: After searching online I've found that to definitely be the case. Moretti appears to not have its own distinct breweries in Italy anymore, but it is produced in Heineken's plants in Italy. So there is still Moretti brewed in Italy, just not in Moretti breweries.

[@Twittler1]

@@StraitKnopfler I think I read somewhere a while back that the Manabrea brewery may have something to do with that, but don’t hold me to it.

[@billyboy9810]

It's no wonder we have so many people dying of diabetes in this country. They're all sitting there in their compression socks drinking sugar added shite and enjoying it. A great British brewed lager would be fantastic but I would still go for German lager all day long, cheers Simon, taking one for the team once again.

[@heiltd1286]

If you bothered to look there are some great British lagers. I'm astonished by the complete absence of inquisitiveness that most people exhibit.

[@t00ty_fru1ty]

Try west brewery st.mungo made in Glasgow. Set up by a German micro student then sold on, but the beer remained great. Perfect German lager! BTW draught about Scotland it is amazing and won German awards.

[@noggintube]

Ansbach and Hobday are worth a look for nice British Lager too. Their Kolsch style is really nice, along with Ansbacher.

[@sixtysecondsofstephens2386]

Frustrating when it's sold as a foreign beer when it's not.

[@mickbanner]

It's called a recipe. Just like Chinese/Indian food made with British produce. Passing on fermentation processes and slightly different ingredients

[@mattysmith83]

American diners are everywhere in the UK. Should they be banned?

[@ambrosejeremiah7869]

The customer is always .........................Bamboozled. I have the knowledge of the breweries' operations which soothes me as I drink my knockoff copy of Stella.

[@thatladfromsheffield]

It....frustrates you?

[@maxhaughton1964]

@@mickbanner Well, quite, Chinese and indian food in the uk is usually nothing like the "real thing" unless you go somewhere at a higher price point

[@MalcolmXpat]

carling isnt 4%, they have previously been to court regarding false advertising, its closer to 3.7%. unbelievably they somehow got away without prosecution and can legally advertise it as 4%

[@jammybizzle666]

It's + or - 0.5% tolerance on labelled ABV I think

[@MalcolmXpat]

@@jammybizzle666 Carling advertises the lager as 4% alcohol by volume (ABV) but it has been brewed at 3.7% since 2012. ABV was reduced in order to cut tax on Carling products, the firm said during a hearing brought by HMRC. According to EU laws relating to the labelling of alcohol, products are allowed an ABV tolerance of +0.5% or -0.5% on products between 1.2% and 5.5% ABV. Carling are cutting their ABV by over 7%. Scandalous.

[@MrGloverLover]

Not true ​@@MalcolmXpat

[@ArtyFactual_Intelligence]

Cats are known not to produce anything remotely comparable to 3.8%

[@couchslouch13]

I think most of the beers in this video are 0.5% less ABV than advertised

[@JohnRoper-h4b]

Bottled San Miguel is brewed in Wolverhampton, not Burton, there's no glucose syrup listed in ingredients and I think its delicious!

[@colonel_carlito]

you certainly need to try san miguel in the philippines where it’s from. absolutely delicious

[@grahamoliver5370]

At least they're making something in this country. But I'd rather drink the British fake Spanish beer Madri over Fosters 7 days of the week. Personal choice obviously.

[@caeserromero3013]

Fosters only became popular in the UK due to the Barry McKenzie cartoon strip in the early 70's. They chose Fosters lager for the character as it was recognised amongst the Australians as being an absolute joke of a beer. But Brits didn't realise, started buying it in large quantities and Fosters pushed it to the limit with the successful Paul Hogan adverts in the 80's.

[@markf3229]

No one in Australia drinks that cat piss Fosters

[@robertscriven602]

Yes no one in Australia really drinks Fosters. There are so many better ones over there. And here for that matter....

[@caeserromero3013]

@@robertscriven602 Yeah, I like VB. Used to be able to get it in Tesco but for some reason they stopped selling it more than 10 years ago....

[@AcesH1gh]

Vaginal backwash ​@@caeserromero3013

[@paulbaker9455]

They call it skippy piss

[@pompeyjim]

Amstel for me. That dog shit was the last straw for me a few years back, and made me go looking for decent beer.

[@heeeeeyyyyyyyyy]

Amstel in the Netherlands is so much better, it’s night and day different.

[@SlurpyDave254]

I had Amstel in Spain...couldn't get half way down the pint, absolutely dreadful stuff

[@TheBigMidweek1889]

It's one of those things you only buy once.

[@71simonforrester]

It's always the beer available in a cheap all inclusive hotel too!

[@andymcgrath2236]

Here in England we are good at cider and craft beer Best lagers are Czech and German you don't get hang overs with them english lagers are full of chemicals Fosters is the worst beer ever

[@Wimpleman]

Nah, Carling is worse. Fosters last time I checked just tasted of absolutely nothing, whereas Carling abuses your taste buds.

[@Corky341]

I used to ger regular hangovers from 'one too many' Warsteiner, when I lived in Soest. :-)

[@EvoraGT430]

@@Corky341 Another name for Warsteiner is of course "wobbly".

[@arto9775]

My da says that all the time about German beer, never listened to him tho lol. Is it actually true?

[@Wimpleman]

@@arto9775 only 1 way to find out!

[@tubesomething]

Interesting, as I'm partial to a St. Miguel or a Birra Moretti. I wouldn't touch any of the others with a bargepole unless it's in a lager shandy in a pub that I've been forced into. I appreciate the approach to testing them all - you're a brave man!

[@CM-dw3gh]

The look of disapointment after the swigs on the first two are priceless😊

[@jameskrell4392]

The things you do to enlighten the masses about Britain's rip of fake beer 😂🍺 This is wrong and should be made illegal, after all you can’t call a Cornish pasty Cornish if its made in Devon.

[@truthteller99999]

If you buy a pasty in Devon, you can just call it BETTER.

[@jameskrell4392]

@@truthteller99999 You could do but I wouldn’t. I live in Devon and I can tell you the places in Cornwall where you can buy excellent pasties, well above average. From Lands End to Liskard, I can’t say the same for Devon.

[@truthteller99999]

@@jameskrell4392 Well, I could tell you where to buy amazing pasties in Devon, but I won't waste my time, as you've already closed your mind and don't deserve them.

[@biscuit4259]

It was when we were in the EU - there’s a directive that we participated in developing to protect regional produce.

[@kavasir7042]

@@biscuit4259 They actually removed protected status for Newcastle brown ale, then they shifted production down south to tadcaster or something and that was when we were in the EU...doesn't taste the same either.

[@chrisbartram6644]

"What's the difference between Bud Light and sex in a canoe?" "They're both f**king close to water"

[@alanthomson1227]

Thanks to Python .

[@steve-bk1qd]

boom boom

[@chollis380]

Shouldn’t that be what’s the similarities, and not what’s the difference?

[@thisisnotforalltosee1875]

Would that sex in a canoe involve Dylan Mulvaney....?

[@johnharley5157]

Yeah, brewed in Mortlake - literal translation, "Dead Water" - exactly what it is...

[@noescape9923]

A north american hall of shame is required- budweiser, coors, canadian molson etc. All taste like sh!t.

[@jackaubrey8614]

Michelob (brewed in the US) used to be pretty decent - never could stand the rest.

[@snowballsvlogs621]

Stella in the states at 5.6% on draft is a good beer.

[@1977Futre]

I used to love michelob​@@jackaubrey8614

[@jkmb5758]

​@@jackaubrey8614 20 years ago, I spent 2 years in the States. I was quite fond of the Michelob Amberbock.

[@WalesRadio]

Americans have come to prefer sweetness in everything. Whether that is evolution or the power of advertising is a matter of debate.

[@NewsJunky1966]

I don't particularly like lagers and prefer German wheat beers. However there's one fairly nice lager/beer that remains brewed in its country of origin, Super Bock. A Portuguese Lager Beer with 35 Consecutive Gold Medals. Its ingredients are stated as: Water, Barley Malt, Unmalted Cereals (Maize and Barley), Hops. Only made in Portugal and only comes in bottles.

[@Sabhail_ar_Alba]

The Portuguese Crystal beer (5.1 ABV) is also very good - Water, malted barley, un-malted cereals (maize and barley), hops

[@Connorthecob]

So informative! You've singlehandedly changed my future drinking choices mate - subscribed! 🍻

[@sdw_71]

A friend of mine only ever has all these crappy brands in his fridge. Whenever he offers me one I politely decline and ask for a cup of tea instead!

[@helenloughton2418]

Surprised you have friends supporting that shit club

[@ricolasroc5890]

Love this video. The passion and loathing of these beers is special.

[@ChocolateTampon]

I once went out with a girl and her surname was Carling. Two fingers for head was accurate.

[@ArtyFactual_Intelligence]

Went down a treat I guess.

[@bigbywolf586]

😂 best comment, bravo 😂

[@IIJAMZYII]

😂😂

[@garylancaster8612]

😂

[@carlt9265]

Victoria malaga is the best when a actually on tap in the costa del sol its lovely

[@Mrmallet777]

Im not taking advice from a guy who pours beers like that 😂

[@pastyman001]

How is this allowed. I used to work in what was Dept of Trade & Industry Consumer Affairs policy covering origin marking. You could put a geographic place name on a product even if not from there so long as you put a corrective place & description on there so as not to mislead consumers. While I'm at it, all British Lager is absolute rubbish and not at all good for you as full of chemicals . Ale is way better.

[@garethwilliams976]

Which is the worst is a matter of personal preference but one thing is undeniable. Making purchasers believe by labelling that a beer has been brewed abroad when it has not and only having a tiny note on the rear of the can denoting the true origin is deceitful and should be banned. The origin should be prominently stated on the front of the can and on the pump.

[@Spica1000]

Well, for me, larger is always inferior to proper ale. Having said that, I personally don’t think you’re getting the best experience out of a can anyway, should always be from a bottle! Cans always make the beer gassy and taint the flavour some what

[@josephberrie9550]

ffs mate its lager it says it on all the cans and bottles......DUH

[@Spica1000]

@@josephberrie9550 I suppose you know what your on about! I vertically don’t ! Have another can, think you’ve already had a couple !

[@1972hermanoben]

Cans don’t impair a beer’s flavour any more than a keg will 😅, cans can’t leak gas but capped bottles can to a small degree. Either way, I agree there isn’t a single ‘beer’ in this test that’s really going to stand up favourably against a decent well-kept ale.

[@mjudec]

Odd, because cans should allow the beer to be fresher. The important thing in all cases is to pour into a glass as both cans and bottles are over carbonated to improve storage. I used to enjoy ale but since it went all craft and super super choppy it's been ruined for me. Proper Helles or Pilsner remains my preference, though not the crap these craft breweries wrongly label pilsner or helles.

[@bens1491]

Always wondered why I had a strong dislike for San Miguel, now all is clear. Great Vid

[@Shagyamum]

Carlsberg, fosters, or cruzcampo. Taste like stale piss.

[@IIJOSEPHXII]

My local off licence was carrying imported San Miguel and it was great. Had a really distinct flavour. I used to get a can every few days. Then one day I was drinking a can and the flavour had gone. Looked on the label and it said "Brewed in the UK"

[@mjudec]

To be honest, Spanish San Miguel isn't great. Best lagers here are Alhambra reserva (the green one) and estrella Galicia. Happily you can get estrella Galicia in the UK now, I believe. And it's properly imported. Spanish beers generally are quite light, so may be less well suited to UK climate where a more robust taste is wanted. German beers are great for that, but always read the label... I can still get proper Belgian Stella Artois and it's night and day from the horrific stuff in the UK. I live near Gibraltar so can easily sample both.

[@georgeyboy8186]

⁠​⁠@@mjudecI'm going to try an estrella Galicia next time I see one thanks for the tip

[@grimTales1]

I found the imported San Miguel once as well

[@1977Futre]

Happens all the time. Happened with Becks. Used to love it. sharp and bitter...really drinkable. Then one day nothing. Moved to UK.

[@mjudec]

@@1977Futre Becks must've been ages ago. I remember hating becks but having it one night in Berlin (back 2010) and realising it was completely different.

[@AndrewSmith-ug8tz]

Thankfully, I live in Bavaria, Germany. Until the EU overturned the 500 year old German Purity law, due to EU rules on trade agreements, it was ILLEGAL to sell these fake, chemical, beers in Germany, ILLEGAL! The mystery to me is, why do they call it lager in the first place? no one else does, lager means store/warehouse in German. Beer is called bier!

[@stuwhite2337]

I remember reading about the German beer purity laws when I was studying economics in the early 90's in the run up to the 1992 Maastricht treaty. Not one of the EU's finer moments.

[@354sd]

What's the best German beer?

[@stuwhite2337]

@@354sd if you go to Germany then beer you buy in the local bar is usually the best!

[@gbentley8176]

Is lager not a wagon encampment? Suppose they drank it there; hate the gassy UK rubbish.

[@bazpearce9993]

I used to enjoy a can or four of Stein. I'm not sure how well it goes down there, but i remember it being tasty compared to the regular.

[@steve-bk1qd]

Cruzcampo 'Seville' ...coming at you from an industrial estate in some Godawful part of the UK - Salud mis amigos !

[@nickvickers3486]

Cruzcampo has a pretty shitty rep here in Spain, although when it is 40 degrees in Andalusia a few cañas of it will go down quite well!

[@SQUIZZLER24]

Fosters is the only lager I’ve ever had that gave me a raging hangover off just two pints. Wasn’t even pissed, just felt genuinely ill after drinking it and woke up the next morning with a blasting headache. The whole time I was drinking it, it had this weird sensation it was “beer-flavoured soft drink” rather than actual beer, with a strong metallic tinge, as if the can had leeched into it, despite then being brand new cans straight off the shelf. Absolutely horrendous.

[@alexfenton229]

Agreed! It's the only weak lager that gives me the arse and makes me aggressive after a couple of pints 😂

[@nicholascarrington4202]

I believe that some weaker beers have cogeners added. They are natural product from the brewing procee, but they're the compounds that give you the hangover. Methanol is probably the worst it breaks down into formic acid and formaldehyde(used as a preservative in such things as embalming fluid and those nice specimens you see in glass jars in museums). The darker the drink, the more cogeners.

[@jodyswallow1008]

Half a pint of Fosters kills me the next day. I avoid the stuff at all cost.

[@Mrmallet777]

3.7 percent why bother

[@mindematt]

All of UK lagers are worst than the worst. Imported lagers only and Belgium beers the way to go! 🍻

[@MadMarchTaffy]

I am convinced that there is a brewery in Burton with only one massive brewing vat and a canning line with all the Euro Fizz brands that go through it - same stuff - different cans

[@alexlangford6291]

I bet Simons garden hasn't got any slugs.

[@robinho1978.]

Not any live ones that’s for sure

[@stevebrand1619]

@@robinho1978. Never heard the term drunk as a slug though😂.

[@billd10001]

@@stevebrand1619 beer traps for slugs is an old method of slug Annihilation, any cheap shite beer will do

[@stevebrand1619]

@@billd10001 of course i knew that but the fate of hung over slugs is rather extreme😥

[@davebellamy4867]

Not now anyway!😂🤣😅

[@MrModamanReviews]

I can't believe that anyone would be surprised that light, commercial lagers are on the sweet side.

[@MKOFT3N]

Why San Miguel is the most popular beer in the UK I will never know. Finishing a can of it is a real challenge.

[@johnnyfreespeech5815]

I remember a few years ago Tesco Extras were selling much smaller cans of San Miguel Especial (I think they were 330ml like soft drink cans) and we were drinking them in the workshop every day after work in the summer at the car dealership I worked in at the time. They tasted nicer than the cans that you get now and were also 5.4% All the other ‘beers’ here I wouldn’t touch with a barge pole though… Edit - I just found out that those smaller 5.4% beers were imports. No wonder they suddenly disappeared from shops after a few months and no wonder they tasted so good lol. My old man worked at the same place as me and he in particular loved them, I’ve just bought a load of 500ml imports off the web as a nice summer treat for him. Happy days!

[@matt-ir1xq]

I've always liked a san Miguel tbh and much prefer it over fosters or carling. Pretty shocked it came the bottom of his list but yeah the taste has somewhat gone to shit over the years. I find the 600ml bottles taste the best these days.

[@terrylalley]

Full bodied review. Excellent viewing. Your bravery in drinking some of that, deserves a medal.

[@johnbailey4618]

The whole UK lager brewers need a big shake up , and start making proper larger . Absolutely no reason why we can't have a decent home brewed larger in the uk

[@Ken_oh545]

Who wrote this, Loadsamoney? He was always 'larging' it 😂

[@chrish215]

It does. But why should beer be sabotaged by tax. We have high living costs and nothing to show for it.

[@heiltd1286]

It's 'Lager' not 'Larger'. What's concerning is that people like you will be voting in the upcoming General Election.

[@jimmymcguire8217]

​@@heiltd1286put that can of Stella down 😂

[@heiltd1286]

@@jimmymcguire8217 I don't drink Stella. Stella Unfiltered on occasions.

[@Jonsson474]

Correction. Holsten is still brewed I Hamburg. In Altona. Altona is a Hamburg district. It’s just not brewed in the old brewery since Carlsberg bought it.

[@MrGoogle-f4j]

Last I checked, Kronnenbourg that is brewed in UK is brewed with Finings and so in my opinion it SHOULD be on the worst list. Its cutting corners and if I wanted fish in or with my beer I would just drink a good beer with some seafood😂 With that said beer should be simple? What you reckon?🤷🏻‍♂️ Veggies beware!

[@greva2904]

I’m about to admit to sacrilege… I actually really like Kronnenberg! Moretti can be ok in small doses, the rest of this lot I avoid like the plague. In fact I’m proud to say I’ve never drunk a single sip of Carling, Fosters or Madri. Or in fact any of the others featured here, come to think of it.

[@MrGoogle-f4j]

With all that said, kronnie does still a bit better than carlsberg, carling and fosters. If I had only these to choose of course

[@Twittler1]

@@MrGoogle-f4j All beers everywhere, except unfiltered varieties, have finings added AFTER brewing. It’s not ‘cutting corners’, it’s established practice, part of the maturation stage. Most large corporate brewers now use artificial finings, whereas most smaller and more traditional ones still use dried and very finely ground fish swim bladders (essentially ballast/buoyancy tanks). Finings are added after filtering to drag unwanted solids down to the bottom of the tank/barrel/whatever, where they settle as ‘dregs’. They completely settle out of the beer. Without finings, that process would take weeks, and still wouldn’t be complete - finings do the job very quickly and far more thoroughly. Also without finings, your beer would be cloudy and full of tiny, slowly decaying floaters; yum! Do try and find out about stuff before broadcasting your ignorance.

[@MrGoogle-f4j]

@@Twittler1 i did find out, its unoficially called the German standard. 4 ingredients only. And should in theory like Heineken, holsten and many others be suitable for a vegetarian which I am not by any means - but is a good indication and entry standard for competitive brewing. P.s the french Kronnenbourg does NOT use finng so wrong again. Its a UK thing.

[@Twittler1]

@@MrGoogle-f4j Finings aren’t an ingredient, they’re a clearing agent, aren’t used in brewing the beer, and don’t remain in it. They don’t dissolve in water. They join the other ‘impurities’ at the bottom of the tank, and are drained away. Most breweries don’t use swim bladder finings any more - they use artificial, non-soluble agents instead. They probably call them clearing agents or some such. What I do know is that if the beer is perfectly clear, it’s been fined, whatever has been used to do that. All beer. Everywhere. No exceptions.

[@davidgallagher165]

Im 70 and I've been drinking Stella Artois since i was old enough and still do. The best thing ever to come out of Belgium 🇧🇪. Was even better at 5.2 abv.

[@Snowdog2711]

You clearly haven't tasted Leffe (and that's just for starters amongst Belgian beers)

[@extramild1]

Do these brewers hold their customers in contempt?

[@heiltd1286]

If you look at the people who drink these beers, you'll see that the contempt is justified.

[@Fitzrovialitter]

​@@heiltd1286Astute.

[@nigelwatson2750]

The guys at Maku Brewing in Finland were singing your praises, Simon. I was drinking their excellent beer all weekend at the Iskelmä music festival in Pori.

[@holycannoli64]

I wondered why this came up in my recommendations 😂 God bless you, Nigel.

[@martinroberts4391]

You missed Corona, which is now brewed in the UK. Was one of my favourite beers, I served in the royal Navy for 12 years and knew that no matter where in the world you stopped Corona would always taste the same. The flavour profile changed a few years back and that coincided with the brewing coming to the UK

[@71simonforrester]

That's rough , the original was really good at not giving you a hangover!

[@ihallsworth]

My Dad once got hold of Australian brewed castlemaine XXXX. So much better than the stuff brewed in Burton

[@paulhannan9739]

Fosters = "WET ... but not too bad ... the best fake International beer" 😁 Carling = "Mucky" 🤔 Madri = "Exactly the same as Carling" 😮 Carlsberg = "Very sweet, very very sweet"😮 Bud Light = "Sweet, sweet, sweet ... it's like a Haribo!" 🤕 Stella = "Skunky!"😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 Moretti = "Sweet, sweet, sweet, .... actually, that's not too bad" 🤔 San Miguel = "Atrocious ... everything you don't want in a beer ... really is a horror beer" 🤢 Holsten = "Sweet, sweet, sweet, ... like a melted Haribo!" 🤮🤮🤮 Top class critical opinion. Much appreciated. 🤩👍

[@Etalex77]

Guys, it's pretty easy: Just avoid any lagers under 5% and those made with maize, glucose syrup or rice. This way you'll likely be ok. It's not 100% waterproof, but a good rule of thumb.

[@marcustankus4424]

Glucose syrup is the work of the devil , A USA food and drink filler to bulk it out the product as cheaply as possible .

[@pgf289]

I don't think they even have to label that though, I'm sure some of the Polish lagers (which are decent compared to the shit he's just drunk) have something like that in which adds sweetness, but you won't see it listed on the can...

[@nickbrown6457]

What lagers are 5% and over and available in the supermarket or local shop? San Miguel, Holsten, any others? I can't think of any. I'm all in favour of stronger and nicer lager, but often can't find anything in my local shop.

[@Etalex77]

@@nickbrown6457 Budvar, Staropramen, Tyskie, or, if you can't find those, Heineken. Tyskie and Heineken are not great beers, but are much better than any of the crap showcased in this video.

[@digitig]

Rice can be ok if it's traditional for the brewing region - basically south and east Asia. *If* it's done well.

[@nedseagoon5101]

I used to love an Aussie beer in the 90s called Victoria Bitter. It came in a stubby bottle with a green label. It was quite malty. You don’t see it anywhere now.

[@stephen1562]

VB Bitter a kind of cross between bitter and lager, brewed in Melbourne. Excellent stuff

[@lesliehart]

absolute crap, the best is Boags or Cascade

[@stephen1562]

@@lesliehart Thanks for your insightful comment Leslie

[@andrewcarter1966]

Remember drinking Victoria Bitter in OZ in stubbie bottles in the 80s. Genuine CUB beers out of Melbourne, inc Fosters, totally different to what appeared in UK. Ice cold midi glasses on drafts absolutely hit the spot.

[@ratttttyyy]

@@lesliehart Aussie beer is generally pretty crap IMO. You're much better at wine.

[@pubert4845]

Absolutely right, San Miguel is utterly foul.

[@Manos-de-Piedra]

Not worse than carling

[@DamonSlater]

Where can I buy non-UK brewed lagers?? And which ones would your recommend? Even Staropramen, Pravha, Peroni, CruzCampo, Asahi, they all seem to be brewed in the UK

[@dexterbeef1132]

Your local Polish shop usually has a range of Lagers, some of which are actually quite drinkable!

[@albo2591]

All of those drinks would be considered‘premium’ in a supermarket or pub but ive tried them all time and time again and i find a glass/bottle of any of them hard to finish.. they go flat and taste bad. Asahi is absolutely terrible, they advertised that hard on james may in japan then it was all over the place in England

[@neilstorey4772]

Aldi sell some nice German larger reasonable price as well for a pint bottle

[@brendanpells912]

Lidl, Aldi. Just double check the label. The Twoj polish supermarket in Nottingham has a good selection of beers from central and eastern Europe.

[@harriergr7728]

I import my favourite beer (Bier) from Salzburg, it’s called Stiegl, It works out at £3.24 for a 500ml can. The downside is that you have to buy 24 cans, shame that. Austrian Food UK is where you can find it.

[@judeskii]

First time I have found this channel. Great work. Learned so much about green bottle taste issues and Burton water . As a non UK person i do find it odd that there are no real genuine UK lagers. I used to enjoy the Guinness hophouse 13 (yes, Irish) but it seems to have disappeared off supermarket shelves. Had a lovely unique taste.

[@-Pol-]

Yes, me too and it was friends that introduced me to it. It was popular by word of mouth and not premium priced . I wonder why it's disappeared?

[@lukedaniels7750]

There's plenty of genuine UK lagers. Try Lost and Grounded Keller Pils to start.

[@ravenhandley]

@@-Pol- still available in Ireland and NI - i was in belfast a couple of weeks ago and was delighted to see it

[@DaleSteel]

That moretti is stronger than you think and leaves you a rocking hangover

[@DavidB-py8nz]

Si wasn't you saying madri was a good lager when you initially reviewed it a year or 2 ago? I thought you was quite positive about it!

[@andrewsteer8860]

There’s zero reason to have to buy anything like this, pretty much every supermarket these days sells at least 1 proper, German lager, even Stella unfiltered is brewed by Camden Town brewing company and is a relatively inexpensive step up from this garbage!

[@pigknickers2975]

I'm not an expert but didn't Camden (where I live) get bought into Heineken?

[@andrewsteer8860]

@@pigknickers2975 they did, you’re absolutely right but they’ve sort of been left alone as I think they were already profitable. Most of their beers are still somewhat decent

[@GrahamWalters]

Madri is brewed by the same brewery that make Coors and Carling, it's got no Spanish heritage whatsoever and is totally brewed in the UK. Most of these beers are fine in the country of origin, it's Allied Breweries that ruin them. Moretti in the UK is like cats piss compared to Moretti in Italy.

[@markcallaghan8389]

agree not even a full 5% abv cats piss.

[@ingopaul67]

Allied Breweries was merged into Carlsberg-Tetley in the mid 90s, so not been around for years. Bass (Molson Coors), Allied Breweries (Carlsberg-Marstons), Whitbread (AB InBev) have all been responsible for these fake foreign beers, not to mention destroying our brewing heritage.

[@mufc7557]

I like moretti .. 660 with a pizza god stuff

[@colonel_carlito]

moretti in italy is what all the homeless drink..cheap and nasty

[@ihallsworth]

Thing is if you throw millions behind an advertising campaign ansd do things like sponsor the premier league then you can con the masses.

[@michaelporteous3083]

Home Bargains got Spanish brewed Mahou 4 pack 330ml bottles for £4.99 just now ,what a difference in quality compared to other UK brewed Spanish beers

[@scottb5907]

Mahou is really great.

[@MLAM168]

Victoria Malaga is much better than Mahou IMO.

[@scottb5907]

@@MLAM168 I agree that it's better but I wouldn't say it's much better.

[@Jbaxter736]

hi Simon That is why I do not buy Heineken-branded products produced in Manchester. I would rather spend my money at the lights of Robinsons or Joseph Holt, or smaller local breweries in Greater Manchester and the north-west of England.

[@markmanc-zw3td]

Holts bitter - bang on mate , but their lagers are good too !

[@Jbaxter736]

@@markmanc-zw3td Yeah, correct, my friend. The lager I'll drink on draft is Joseph Holt's Diamond Premium Lager.

[@briandawkins984]

Heineken is corn syrup like- dreadful stuff. 🇨🇦

[@markmanc-zw3td]

@@Jbaxter736 When I was younger, there were lots of choices of beers from smaller Gtr Mcr breweries- Boddingtons (not at Strangeways & crap now imo) Holts, Wilsons, Lees, Oldham Brewery,Hydes, Robinsons, Chesters (under Whitbread moved from Gorton to Salford) And if that wasn't enough you'd get the odd Tetleys from over the hill in Yorkshire Leeds.

[@Jbaxter736]

@@markmanc-zw3td Samuel Smith also had quite a lot of pubs in the Salford area back then, and they were also from Yorkshire.

[@Gilberto90]

I feel like part of the problem is that Burton water and Burtonised water is great for ales but for lagers it’s no good. I wonder what the composition of the water in Pilsen is like? I did have a can of UK Cruzcampo recently and I was surprised that I didn’t find it too bad and I felt it tasted similar enough to the original; although it’s been a few years since I had some in Spain and it wasn’t really one of my preferred beers there anyway.

[@Bloomazz]

I recently had a year in Australia, hearing the usual Fosters jokes about it being piss and so they export it. Couldn't find it anywhere, saw a can of it floating around the street once. Finally when I got back home I had a pint as my first when I got back. Hands down better than any of the draught I had in Australia. And I've never been a fan (and still wouldn't get it if I any decent beers were priced the same)

[@Elvis35-77]

Tennent's for me, piss water made from quality Scottish piss water!

[@jasonpratt927]

My local is a One Stop owned by Tesco so I can get Old Peculiar and Timmy Taylor's Landlord but to name a few ! 👌

[@tarbyonlineful]

Carlsberg Export is definitely brewed in the UK (iirc as with San Miguel in Northampton, but who knows where it is with the way these big brewers like to chop and change ). Madri used to be brewed in Tadcaster as well

[@MrGloverLover]

It still is brewed in Tadcaster, and Burton

[@SlurpyDave254]

Now Simon that is the ultimate ' TAKING ONE FOR THE TEAM'😂😂

[@raymondo162]

taking the pee

[@lmarcinn]

All those beers are originally much much stronger...

[@ihallsworth]

Have you tried Czech Mates from Thornbridge?

[@DaleSteel]

I've gone off larger over the years. When I'm on holiday I like it. I thought it was just me but I now realise it's because the beers I loved (1664 ) are completely different now they are UK brewed

[@josephberrie9550]

larger what the eff is larger..is it nearly the same as LAGER

[@albo2591]

1664 has been reduced to 4.6% .. I would go for the 4x 5% pint tinnys for 6 quid simply cos it was a good deal but I wouldnt bother buying it at all now

[@markjohnathanappleton8642]

Another excellent video Simon, unfortunately the uk don't know i to produce a good lager, except independent breweries, Samuel Smith's organic pure brew lager is the best brewed UK lager

[@Jaystars]

Golden Eagle from Brew York is a nice lager

[@chrisiser4860]

Love seeing you have a BentSpoke T on, absolutely fantastic brewery. 👍👍👍

[@The.Epicurean]

Mate, I've been saying for years that the pisswasser from the Trent is detectable in all the beers brewed there. Horrible.

[@ratemybeer1]

Also I got to admit I drink a bit of bud light on Keg (much better than Can) to keep me sober sometimes saves me getting in too much trouble..