What is the weirdest roll as a DM you had to do for your players?

[@blakeetter280]

The divine intervention made me lose it XD thanks editor

[@Lheticus]

Has that ever happened in one of these videos before? First I've seen it.

[@MinnesotaCouchpotato]

First time I saw this, but I'm grateful for the intervention. I was eating while watching the video.

[@joonyah8904]

@@MinnesotaCouchpotatoI’m also eating while watching this lmao

[@Me-Person-Me]

not the DM but probably when he had to ask our Ork Barbarian to "roll a D20 persuasion to see if the kobolds except your TOE FUNGUS as a PEACE OFFERING"

[@AzaloonyToons]

@some_dude9613🤓

[@venus_de_lmao]

Well, did they?

[@Damy-t4v]

We need to know​@@venus_de_lmao

[@Me-Person-Me]

@some_dude9612 You know that you don't need to correct people's grammar yourself when You've got Grammarly! :D Here's an example of a bad sentence, it's to wordy and hard to read. "There is currently a lively, ongoing controversy among many sociologists and other professionals who study human nature: theories are being spun and arguments are being conducted among them about what it means that so many young people-and older people, for that matter-who live in our society today are so very interested in stories about zombies." You see, writings not easy. That's why Grammarly can help. This sentence is grammatically correct, but it's wordy, and hard to read. It undermines the writer's message, and the word choice is bland. Grammarly's cutting edge technology helps you craft compelling, understandable writing that makes an impact on your reader. Much better. Are you ready to give it a try? Installation is simple and free. Visit Grammarly.com today!

[@dr.bentenjaminoctaviusocto1658]

SKONG?!?

[@kyleward3914]

As a joke, a player of mine used to call out random checks for mundane tasks. They'd be walking, and he's say, "I make a walk check" or "I make a breathe check" or whatever. They're camping one night, and he says he's going to make an eat check to eat his meal. I tell him to roll for it. Not only does he fail to eat anything, the nat 1 sees him becoming violently ill, effectively uneating his previous meal.

[@venus_de_lmao]

I rolled a nat 1 irl on an eat check and almost choked to death

[@hannahdigioia692]

I would have ruled a nat 1 on an eating check means you spill your meal on the ground

[@el_n0g]

When the party was in prison, one of the players asked if he could roll to walk through the wall. Not by any magic or anything, just the atoms perfectly aligning so they pass through like that one meme. The DM allowed each of us to try this by rolling a d100, with a 100 being a success. Take a wild guess what I rolled. This resulted in my character casually stumbling into the warden’s office that was SUPPOSED to be locked behind some really challenging combat and traps, instead turning it into a very easy 1v1 (with a surprise round, naturally,) resulting in our party escaping within about five minutes. Definitely my favourite moment playing D&D to date and I will forever respect my DM for rolling with it so well.

[@justenoughrandomness8989]

the probability would be more realistic if it had to be 5+ in a row for it to work

[@AnoNymous-gn6tl]

@@justenoughrandomness8989 True, but that would spoil the fun, right? 😉

[@run-a-milekyle3835]

This reminds me of the movie: Men Who Stare At Goats

[@Godzillawolf1]

Short Version: Roll a persuasian check to ACCIDENTALLY seduce the Wererat Queen. Long Answer: The Druid was trying to negotiate with a Wererat Queen to nonviolently end a conflict. The Warlock decided 'I'm going to act as the Druid's wingman' and they failed a Stealth check to not have her overhear them...but not by enough to overhear everything, just the Druid being asked to rate her on a scale of one to ten and him saying I believe a nine. So as this continued, it just continued with the Druid accidentally proceeded to make the Wererat Queen more interested in him. So I had him roll a check to 'accidentally seduce' her. And it succeeded. The Druid and the Wererat Queen are presently in a relationship with a pair of Sending Stones they use to talk back and forth. Note, the player WAS aware of where this was going and happy with the outcome.

[@PatientSqueaky]

I like this one because it’s not like “oh roll to see if you have sex” or ended in that way. Just a little mis-hearing that turned into a little relationship (also I love how they use the sending stones to talk each other lol)

[@AzaloonyToons]

Please tell me more this actually sounds wholesome

[@theblancmange1265]

-Rolling for penis shrinkage when taking a skinny dip in cold water. -Middle aged character got flirty with a seamstress. One player mentioned we don't know her age. DM rolled a die for age and got 11.

[@justenoughrandomness8989]

oh no💀

[@spartanhawk7637]

@@justenoughrandomness8989 "You suddenly feel a hand on your shoulder and turn around. It's Chris Hansen. Roll a new character."

[@ЛарисаКис-и8ю]

​@@spartanhawk7637😭😭

[@imarro9274]

... Yeahhh, pro'bly shoulda set a floor for that roll. 😅

[@theblancmange1265]

@@imarro9274 We convinced him to retcon it to a d20 + 10 roll.

[@tennagon3822]

"Roll for Friendship" was a unique Charisma skill I had to add because they wanted to be friends with *everyone.* Best homebrew rule I ever added.

[@athenaraines]

This weird roll has a bit of backstory. My party of level 7 ish adventurers was aboard a magical pirate ship where the very wood in the floorboards was hiding transfigured zombie and skeleton pirates. There were various hints that this was once the vessel of a prince and his new wife, but the maiden was struck down by a plague on their honeymoon, driving the prince to madness. The prince pleaded with a death god for his love back, began practicing necromancy to meet that end as well…And unfortunately for him, Thanatos listened to his pleas. Punishing him for attempting to break the boundary of life and death, Thanatos cursed him to act as his champion, fusing his body to that of his lover who now took the form of a zombified dragon, and tasked the prince with finding a worthy group of adventurers to essentially act as assassins. Basically, the inciting incident of the campaign was an experiment during which several gods (including Thanatos) had slipped through a momentary rift between the mortal realm and the divine and had taken champions of their own to try to wrest more followers and power for themselves. Thanatos, a lawful neutral entity, was trying to restore the balance of power. The party made it to the captains quarters of the ship where the prince was waiting for them. There was supposed to be combat here, but a series of careful negotiations allowed the party to convince him to bring forth the death god and hear his request. And now…The roll that singlehandedly changed the entire complexion of this campaign. “I want to ask him out” I BEG YOUR FUCKING PARDON?? The paladin, a changeling man who was disguised as a lizardfolk, was trying to score a date with the LITERAL GRIM REAPER. There was one flirtation check before this, and he scored just high enough to not get smited instantly for his insolence. After calming down the roaring laughter at the table and explaining to the player that they were putting their character’s life on the line for this (only for them to double down), I had the now probably doomed paladin roll a DC 30 charisma check to ask Death itself on a candlelit date on the Styx. Anything less than a 25, and their ass was toast. After a few minutes of the party hyping up the paladin like a group of drunken frat boys, the die was thrown. NATURAL. FUCKING. 20. +6 to persuasion. +3 from guidance. +5 from the house rule bonus to critical successes. Total roll: 34. He pulled it off. Fast forward to the now level 12 party; the paladin is now essentially a grim reaper in training with a homebrew subclass, partially undead and able to cross between the mortal realm and the afterlife at will. Thanatos is now a consistent source of lore and quests, as well as a cheaper (but not free) alternative to revival spells. They skipped an entire boss fight and an entire planned quest to obtain a working ship to go find an important macguffin. To this day, that is the third highest d20 roll ever recorded at the table, only behind a couple of performance checks by a bard with expertise, guidance, and inspiration. That paladin will forever be known as the one who had the balls to seek out a date with Death and the charisma to convince it to ask for more. And I learned the lesson all DMs must learn eventually: You can never, ever, EVER plan for every batshit insane plan your party will come up with, and Murphy’s Law will always be waiting around the corner to foil your plans and derail your sessions. I love this game:

[@EdKolis]

Playing the new Sims expansion I see

[@richyrich6511]

One time the party was up against the stariotypical bbeg, long black robes, custom baby seal leather boots, and the like. Well after they defeated him the bard of the party went "I want his boots". I told him he had to roll for how well they fit becouse they were made for a dude that was 20 feet tall. He rolled and got Nat 20. And so the bard got a pair of boots that fitted so well it gave him a permanent sense of euphoria as long as he wore them and a story of how they defeated the villan who was from now on remembered as Tiny Foot the terrible.

[@blakeetter280]

During one of my dungeon crawls I had a trap that teleported the paladin off somewhere else. He was fine and just had a little solo jaunt for a few minutes while the rest of the party chilled. He returned a few minutes later and I asked what the other two had been doing in his downtime. The half elf replied that’d they’d been playing strip poker (unprompted). So I asked how they were doing, rolled, and we found out the half elf was missing her top. While laughing I asked him to roll for cup size. Got a 14, which I ruled as a CC cup. So yeah, rolled for boob size

[@EdKolis]

Unexpected FATAL

[@vortega472]

"You just Ron Jeremy'd yourself..." was the last thing I expected to hear today.

[@Asnerlicious]

Rogue falls off a Daerns instant fortress suddenly. Takes fall damage from 40ft up landing on rocks below. Rogue: "Can I use uncanny dodge for this?" DM: "Do you consider the earth to be your enemy?" Rogue: "um... yes."

[@EdKolis]

The secret to flying is to throw yourself at the ground and miss. -Douglas Adams

[@luigines6457]

This was our most recent session. My brother made a DMPC for our party in an earlier campaign that he dropped out of the party after we had enough players and got to a high enough level. That DMPC was later given control to another friend who hadn't played DnD before, but wanted to try it. This DMPC is a mountain dwarf, and while we were adventuring in the woods, the new player wanted to roll to see if he could find a rock he could eat. He rolled a nat 20. To find an edible rock. The DM had no clue what to say about that. He was described to have found and eaten a piece of coal.

[@zipperfingers749]

I remember a friend that rolled performance to sing “Sloprano” while covered in poop as a distraction.

[@thod-thod]

“Roll athletics to try to fling the cat into orbit across the chasm of doom”

[@epicsage16]

I once had a brand new player who wanted to test the boundaries (“I can do ANYTHING?”) at the beginning of a one-shot. I forget what he was trying to do (fart on command?) but I had him roll either a Constitution check or saving throw, which he failed. I ruled that he shit his pants. Not wanting to ruin his first game, I then hand waived him cleaning up and buying new pants. Got some good chuckles and what was supposed to be a one-shot turned into a two-session dungeon crawl. Everyone seemed to have a good time.

[@RanierMedic]

Had to roll a wisdom check for a dragon after the paladin commanded it not to breath fire.

[@venus_de_lmao]

I'd allow Kerd's sack tap, but he has to make a con save to see if he is doubled over in pain for a round

[@otakucon]

Had to roll for ducks. They came to a large lake and the druid had to know how many ducks there were for him to ask questions to

[@aspiffysquirrel]

I was undercover as a waiter, did a Performance check to see if I could get the Charcuterie Board to look just absolutely goddamn magnificent. Nat 20.

[@newdonktimes2034]

We were doing an investigation and did a lot of love making to help get answers but since it’s not really on the paper the DM made us put love making in our sheets. So now every time we do it we roll for it.

[@BlueGriffin20]

I think this is the first time I’ve met the divine editor. Nice to meet you.

[@Crocogator]

dwarf snorting elf dust got me good. AE FEEL LEAKE HUGGIN A TREE

[@kyrabergen3553]

I once played a Camazotz (werebat) in a Werewolf: the Apocalypse/Changing Breeds game focused on reviving some of the extinct Changing Breeds and Garou Tribes. The party had time-traveled from the modern day to early 1500's South America, prior to the Camazotz's extinction; and the city we found was being threatened by Conquistador werewolves. I had the idea to hinder the invading forces by taking on my swarm-of-bats form, sneaking into their camp in the dead of night and contaminating their food and water supplies with guano. The Storyteller told me to roll for it and called it the "Critical Shit".

[@lexsamreeth8724]

Barbarian rolls an intelligence check... "Okay, I'm going to try and eat the dragon."

[@Zedrinbot]

In one game, the party defeated an amber golem, which left behind amber colored stones naturally. One player, a kobold monk, asked "hey, how's it taste?" So I asked them to choose: high or low. They said high; so I told them I would roll a percentile die, and on a roll of 99 or higher it'd taste like maple syrup. A 2% chance. I rolled a 100.

[@Gabronthe]

what did a 100 taste like

[@foisopracurtir6389]

@@Gabronthe "and on a roll of 99 or *_higher"_*

[@NightFangFenrir]

If it were me I’d say it tasted like pure maple syrup (the really good stuff).

[@mal2ksc]

@@Gabronthe Maple syrup _and_ a waffle.

[@Gabronthe]

@foisopracurtir6389 i kinda wanted to hear more from him because he's like a legendary animator and story teller so I was hoping he'd give an epic description for a 100 roll even if a 99 or 100 was expected.

[@GoldPrince2468]

I was washing my hands and didn’t hear the hand washing story UNTIL I heard “He washed his hands so good it healed himself and the next person he touched…”

[@chubbabubba9]

Got a goblin cart and it was filthy. Instead of cleaning it, our goliath barbarian decided to piss on it as hard as he could. "Nat 20" and it was not longer filthy but wreaked of urine. Roll for piss became the long running joke until that campaign ended.

[@lancebradshaw4829]

That guy who used his balls as weapons should have had to roll for damage done to himself as well.

[@hamster2845]

I was dming and the party invaded a cave which happened to be a hill giant's domicile. There was a baby about to cry in the corner easily twice the size of the barbarian in the party. I told him that he perceived that a full diaper will cause the baby to cry, alerting its mother to come and change it. They worked together with a concentration and strength check to change the diaper.

[@Naymy]

As DM, I would give the Aarakocra a Feat (more a backstory ability really) that grants Advantage on Con saves when attempting to eat raw or rotten food moving forward after doing that. Not against poison or anything, just food stuffs. They could turn it into an eating contest thing at the bar. Maybe get chump-change from some of the bar patrons. Hell, may even make into some plot hook later on in the campaign. Anything that makes the game more fun, and gives me role playing points is always a plus to me.

[@cidlunius1076]

So. Player had their character's aunt and their orgy circus destroyed. But they were all covered in clown blood. *Roll for STDs* I hate some of my experiences as a DM.

[@germanscience7246]

Rolling to see if you are able to induce a stroke in yourself by sheer power of will while you're being puppetted by an undine

[@pcalix17]

Roll a Strength check to pull that woman out of that house wall. The one pulling had to hit between 5-10 to do so safely with anything outside of that range being a penalty. The warrior luckily rolled an 8, pulling the woman who happens to be a Barbarian out of the wall. She rammed her torso headfirst into the wall as a dare from the locals in exchange for 20g. She was smart enough to get payment up front and I remember the warrior laughing and saying, "Is that the reason there are two unconscious men across the road?" The Barbarian had defeated the two local ruffians with just her legs and feet.

[@EdKolis]

Just want to say I like how you've started voicing some of the characters. Really livens things up!

[@Kualinar]

Player wanted to jump on the shoulder of an opponent, grab his head and rip it off. So, had him do an attack roll and a dex test to get on the shoulders, rolled a nat 20 and exactly his dex, two attack rolls to grab the head, rolled 17 and 19, then, a strength test. He then proceed to throw it at a dozen of other opponents that where rushing them, forcing a morale check... With a +12 malus. Roll 2D10+12 and need to roll their morale rating of 12 or less. Some of them passed out, the rest just surrendered. Was in second edition. An attribute need to be as high as possible without going over the attribute. So, rolling an 8 on a strength test when you have 8 in strength is the best success possible, and a 9 a failure with a risk of injuring yourself.

[@nobodyshome6792]

Not myself, but a DM asked me to roll percentile to determine whether or not my Githyanki had psionics. 1% of Githyanki do not have psionics.

[@samzilla1281]

Not me as DM, but the DM in the game when I played my Bard, Jack. She didn't reign in his bedroom adventures. She just faded to black and brought me back in the next morning. Which is perfectly fine with me. She started making me roll a d12 for each time. Without telling me what I needed to roll. She just automatically said "There's a bun in the oven" no matter what I rolled. And I wasn't an absentee father. I had a homebrew teleport device that let me travel anywhere in the world, once a week. I kept a rotation of Jack visiting his children during downtime.

[@tabithachastain6999]

Our DM made one of our barbarians roll intimidation when they took a bet to crack a dragon egg with their butt cheeks

[@mal2ksc]

I had a character visit a brothel -- usually I use this as a place to go for information, either passively soaking up what you hear in the baths or hiring a girl and talking to her because nobody knows more secrets than the Working Girls. Nah, this guy wanted the street cred of scoring so I said "fine, but you hired her for an hour, now what?" He wanted to know if he could have a second go. I said "I don't know, why don't you roll a Constitution check?" He rolled a 1 and forever was stuck with the nickname "Noodle".

[@EdKolis]

Roll constitution for prostitution. Has a nice ring to it.

[@amn0940]

The paladin in our party wanted to kick down a door to progress on the dungeon (we had nothing to pick the lock) and then I decided that my warlock will try to use the freeze cantrip (learned by race feature) to freeze the lock so it'll break easier. The DM made me roll Sleigh of Hand to see how good I could aim the cantrip at the door, Nat20, then the DM described how my expert use of the cantrip made the ice form into the shape of the key and I opened the door that way

[@Cortanis001]

Thank you divine editor, you're a god send. XD

[@dragonriderabens9761]

I may or may not want an artistic rendition of the flexing dragonborn one for reasons...

[@NYCFenrir]

I was a DM at a games' club and they had a poop chart. In a dungeon there spike pit trap that one character decided to poop in. Rolled diarrhea so the poop went down the side. Earlier they had 1 character jump across and tie a rope so no one else had to roll. On the way out they decided for everyone to jump across. One character failed the jump, then rolled a 1 on the dex save to catch the edge. They hit the wall covered in poop, fell into the pit while covered in poop and died to the spikes (he was still hurt from the dungeon). The party decided his body was too nasty to recover.

[@savagkyl0029]

Roll for butt chugging poison from a glass vial from a mage hand

[@nemisisarcher8213]

Editor-man. I did not request saving from his gross tangents.

[@amberphoenixfire3510]

While I did not mind the seeing of Mercy on screen I agree, there was no request for saving from the gross tangents that would likely by hysterical.

[@GustavoGplay]

I think rolling for cock size and having one player roll 1 and the other roll 2 (1d20 = number of centimeters), was the weirdest shit I've ever done.

[@SomeRandomKydd]

Not very exciting, but it rolled on behalf of a door to prevent my players from lock picking it. Here was an item in a room they hadn’t explored that they needed before leaving the tavern so they weren’t supposed to escape yet. But the rogue rolled a nat 20 while to door rolled a nat one so it unlocked. The players thought it was a mimic for a while though as doors don’t normally contest being opened.

[@tuojiangoman3228]

Our Rogue drank the final boss. Long story short, Final Boss became black ooze and tried to engulf our Rogue (I’ll call him Gambit, since that was the main inspiration). Gambit UNO reversed the FB and tried to drink him. Gambit: Nat 20 FB: 2-1=1 The final boss was just dead (this was turn 2, by the way), so my brother (the GM) had to get the guy who killed my Paladin’s adoptive father as a new final boss.

[@saychaysarchive7065]

One of my players wanted to roll to see if his character had a panic attack while riding in an elevator. He explained it as his character having PTSD from years of being locked up in a lab, which made sense although this was definitely a spur of the moment thing because it never happened in any other elevator. So he rolled and his character's mind broke so hard his alternate personality took over for the next three sessions.

[@LilacMonarch]

I knocked down the BBEG during the final fight and since I had already used all my attacks, sat on his face. I rolled a nat 20 for humiliation

[@Anfoeus811]

“Roll for girth”

[@masqueraid988]

For my dm as far as my campaign, if my prestidigitation cleaned our alchemist. Not of chemicals, but of the general amount of grime and gunk on him. It failed!

[@kotzpenner]

Bar Brawl (or rather a setup by the villains to ambush the players in case they try to do anything funny, tense situation), one of the players forced the enemy leader to do a drinking game and I had to play that. Turns out the player won and the bad guy got so drunk he fell asleep. Now his minions think the players killed him so go for revenge with no holds barred. The players wanted to wake him up, so slapped him with an unarmed attack. 58 Damage on a crit. The guy had 60 HP. So we figured that this was a slap so hard, the guy is technically alive but a vegetable from now on. Then they took him hostage and so on. Now I had to rewrite the entire thing into "thief guild is headed by a quadriplegic man but is actually puppeteered by his second in command with the leader as a puppet."

[@cacyk4103]

Context We are running away from chef who belongs to race of (homebrew) souleaters (every single one can tpk us) We lock ourselfs in his kitchen and try to escape Some time later we figure out that the sauce barrel is portal so we all jump in but our rouge cobolt got grabbed by the tail . After few stuggles I ask if I can cut off part of rouge tail... anyway now our rouge is about 30cm shorter from the back.

[@Fayanora]

Damn, now I want to know what he said that was gross enough to warrant divine intervention.

[@darkphoenix539]

roll for ... constipation Not a DM but a player, we were playing a Christmas one-shot as elves rescuing Santa Claus, my elf snuck in hiding in the restroom when the patrol came, of course they found me and told me to leave. I replied that I couldn't and was busy, the DM told me to roll, and we were playing by the rules at the time, with the crit falling on 1-2 and 19-20 + confirmations. I rolled 2, 1, 1, 20, 19, and something around 16. The DM sighed and said that my character had generated a non-divine wind, tearing the door off its hinges, knocking down the guards, and filling the entire room with a plad-green mist, from which my character emerged. It was enough to add Agent Blinky reports for duty - no one had any doubt that I was the “bad” one - infiltration successful

[@terryjoslin1536]

My brother's character had a huge Mohawk and the goop he used to hold his hair stiff stunk. So everytime he applied his goop everyone had to roll con saves or puke..... unfortunately the entire party failed their saves!

[@Drakkwall]

Two such rolls come to mind First up is the event known as... The Randy Muffin incident A gang of Outlaws were smuggling drug stuffed pastries into a city. A player ate an already drugged muffin after another player secretly spiked it with a temporary love potion I rolled on how potent this combination was and the dc was over 25. The ensuing chaos of a love hungry and high dwarf fighter of lvl 14 running around town flirting, singing, dancing, and just getting it on caused the discovery of the drugged pastries, and of five new hybrid races born of dwarven blood. It caused a lot of intruige, crime solving, and many humiliated dwarves as they tried to recreate the potent love making potion to solve their peoples's low birth rates. The second one was Me rolling to determine the velocity of a falling dragon corpse after the party managed to kill it in the sky. It fell down on top of them and killed them by the sudden detonation of the several ton heavy body hitting the earth after falling over eight hundred feet The group did not even look up after they killed it. Seemingly forgetting how gravity works.

[@jasonrustmann7535]

"how much meat can we get from the monkeys we killed?" Me: "...why? The tree they were in was is full of fruit, just eat that" "It's not for us, we want to make monkey hot dogs to sell at our circus!" Me: "...you want to make...hit dogs?" "Or hot-mogs, if you will" And that's the story of how my search history now contains the question. How many hot dogs could you get from one monkey.

[@EdKolis]

I didn't know Mr Sausage was into D&D 😂

[@nabra97]

I witnessed a character rolling a constitution save to sustain errection after another PC invided his bedroom to require booze. He (character; player was she/her) rolled 19 and later insisted that it was size (in santemeters, so don't worry about his partner too much). I believe it was the first or the second game I played with them, and I honestly wasn't even annoyed (I was going through stuff in real life, and I didn't mind something stupid)

[@andreagrossi7656]

"Roll for pregnancy." Don't ask.

[@arcticwolf2742]

Um....not me, but my DM once had us roll for.....uh, "size".

[@jacobc246]

Well, we were doing a campaign for hunting 7 deadly sins as demons, but then one player made a joke about being a racist dwarf. So the DM had him roll for racism on a d100, he rolled a nat 100 and the room went crazy with the first 100 roll I'd ever seen. A few sessions later the party had gone off in various directions, but was coming back together and my 1 month old plasmoid character was alone with the racist character. We RPd him trying to teach my character racism. DM said to roll a d100 for how racist my character became, I rolled another 100 making that the 2nd 100 roll I had ever seen. I don't remember much after that since I was on the floor laughing for several minutes. Took 3 years of playing to get a story like this, but sometimes the dice decide to be the funniest player in the group. Also the campaign changed to making that first player the new deadly sin of racism

[@russellperry9902]

Thank you divine editor

[@JacobL228]

Thank you, Editor.

[@postapocalypticnewsradio]

PANR has tuned in.

[@Obcybr]

My epic multiyear campaign started with a roll for boob size. Playing with tipsy women is wild. The results were 8 and 10 on a d10. I let them decide what size was that.

[@nicholashodges201]

I wasn't the DM, just a player, but the weirdest I think I've seen is the series of rolls for a small dragon choking on a large fruit. The player was in a small village market when the dragon showed up. It was meant to be an adventure hook. He panicked and threw the fruit he was holding. We "confirm" critial rolls to alter the effect. He rolled two consecutive nat 20s. The dragon got the fruit in its mouth as it was inhaling and it lodged in his throat. It actually died from blood loss after trying to give itself a tracheotomy after several failed self heimlich attempts. It was kind of depressing wattching a dragon choke to death on an apple. But frankly even IF he wasn't thrashing so much none us would've gotten close enough to help him...

[@glebmiroshnik]

Felt profound sadness all of a sudden but cracked the case wide open as I recognised music from Disco Elysium in the background

[@Seraco5735]

I choked on my mountain dew. I was not expecting that outro

[@jasonkoulocheris3932]

"I'll call overeem" had me creasing

[@crestenor]

One of my friends’ first rolls as a dm was a roll for “fertility”. I do not recall the context.

[@tazman2253]

had a DM make me roll to basically play my character. To be fair it was a roll to avoid being Aced. They had a NPC that their wife created that was based on Red Dwarfs Ace Rimmer. Basically he was this insulting vain ass of a character. But he had a specific feat that allowed him to be loved by nearly everyone basically you were forced to love him. So I was forced to make a will save every single time I tried to play my character because my character was not one to like vain people. (being vain himself.)

[@EdKolis]

That sounds... not fun. Sorry you had to deal with that.

[@amberphoenixfire3510]

In a game when the party still at low level was fighting a solid stone earth elemental my beast coven rangers' (a class I play often so have many stories for) wolf companion decided to use a bite attack. DM: "Are you sure, it is solid stone it will probably break the wolves teeth" Me: "The wolf is hyper aggressive and protective of the party per his trait table roll, he tries to take a bit out of it." Attack roll: Nat 20 DM then has to describe the wolf somehow managing to take a bite of of the elementals solid stone leg and eating down that bite, to the other players laughter and comments of how the wolf's teeth must have at some point gotten coated in mithril.

[@ShugoAWay]

I had to roll for how many fish died when a character cast lightning bolt in a tiny row boat on a lake

[@EdKolis]

This sounds like a twisted version of several gospel stories from the Bible...

[@MephiticMiasma]

That last story was so wrong it had to leave me giggling.

[@d_0c]

Party finally kills the second to comand of the BBEG, a stone giant wizard, and decide to take a trophy to commemorate the moment. I thought they would take his spellbook or his head… well, they decided to take his pee pee and asked me to roll to see how long it was. On second thought I’should have expected it knowing them (they also rolled for their cup size and their pee pee length) .-.

[@mosquitoe4]

Give us the forbidden knowledge

[@williamchandler2937]

D abd D has got some of the most over powered mularky i have ever heard.

[@kittobrasil]

On my second session of DMing ever, I had one PC oppose a new PC joining the party (new player joining the campaign). They were bickering the entire session, kind of acting as foils to one another. I told them I wasn't going to run PvP, but liked the dynamic so much I came up with an idea. I told them they're going to have a mog battle. I told them to square up and whoever flinches first, would basically lose this weird ego contest. They both did a straight d20 roll and got the exact same number, so it was a tie. We flavored it as one PC holding his katana and the other charging their thunder gauntlets, and locking eyes without a single muscle twitch or feint. After that, the characters kind of developed a mutual respect for each others power, and the new PC joined the party. My group loved this idea so much, we implemented it as our new homebrew mechanic. Super useful for resolving character drama on the fly without the horrors of PvP. My dumbest and smartest idea yet :)

[@larrydotson2625]

I once gave a dragon one of my characters was using as a mount the ability to basically do handle animal checks on people the same way people use handle animal checks on normal animals. And then did a series of these checks on the player who wanted a dragon mount. So essentially his mount was training him instead of the other way around. He got more than a little upset, which resulted in him chasing another player around our gaming table and me laughing so hard I shot hot coffee out my nose.

[@nickmoorman8301]

One day I'll figure out how to get into this game.

[@EdKolis]

Most of what I know about D&D comes from these sorts of videos and posts. I haven't actually played in years and none of the DMs I played with had any clue what they were doing 😂

[@nickmoorman8301]

@EdKolis yeah pretty much as I know comes from these as well, I've asked people that played it how to get started with the game and no one would give me any sort of information, like it's a closely guarded secret or something 😅

[@Scorchdragon76]

mahogany

[@Dookieman1975]

5:06 well I hate u editor. RELEASE THE DISGUSTING CUT

[@The0Stroy]

1:27 Ah yes - Surströmming sandwiches.

[@captainrail88]

Not me (taking a break from DMing). But, we have a player at our regular game that likes to ask if she can roll for gay-dar.

[@marshallrobinson1019]

We love you too editor. Thank you. -"Because that's what heroes do," Editor

[@ReinaSaurus]

roll to see if your bank is handling your money well or if you make losses instead! why did i have to roleplay stashing the partys money into a fund? had to look up investment options for arcane certificates.

[@xerneasgirlpkmn1433]

Please pardon me while I go choke on my spit laughing

[@slitheryrelic7933]

I gotta ask is the dampness meter something homebrew or is there a system where dampness is a factor.

[@AirLancer]

0:45 Damn, reference to The Reem spotted in the wild?

[@TimGalloVids]

to see if one of my players character love interest get pregnant or not lol

[@artemiy88888]

I had to roll for my player's gun to seduce bbeg's cape, both are sentient magic items

[@paulblankenship8344]

I want to see the uncut Brian Von Viyae!

[@Ghoulastre]

My DM does this all the time, thought that's the fun on our bizarre campaigns, or should I say "bizarre adventures", oh ye, one of my homebrew paladins became Dio with stand and all. But there are so many wierd rolls I cant come up with a specific one. However, if one has a hell of variety, is that we from time to time meet q wandering trader, that allows us three random rolls with absolutely random effects. You can have your neck grow, change tone and pronunciation, get some strange infection, grow your neck, not be able to mention anything related to France or it'll rain, a racist rumba, a rat that talks, if you roll 1 a italian hits ya in the nuts, Marie Poppins umbrella, stone potion, ra's eye, a rotten red bull, the diary of "how to be a good husband", etc etc... On our normal encounters we already get a lot of wierd stuff, such as a Drake fan opposite siren (fish body human legs), or that one time one of the party decided to bathe in ancient blood, losing his facial skin. There's a lot but A LOT of wierd rolls. And some unintended puns, such as that one time my character was a allways hungry parasite that ate people, who decided to eat a kid. He's a priest. Ya get the reaction of my crew who understood it the other way. Oh and yeah, there's lotta dark humor too

[@greatazuredragon]

Nice episode.

[@tyranavalon]

I was running 'The Lost Mines of Phandelver' intro campaign, and the players had just encountered Agatha the banshee. We had a bard who took the fact that she didn't try to kill them on sight the wrong (or right) way. He rolled to seduce, natural 20. I rolled her wisdom, 4... She asked to talk to him in private since the rest of the party had not made a good impression, having failed their save against "Horrifying Visage." So I asked if he still wanted to continue seducing Agatha. The answer was yes. I had him roll twice more, 17+6 and 19+6, while she defended with a 5 and 2. I then asked him how far he wanted to go. His reply, "I'm a bard. All the way!" Next I had him roll 2 constitution rolls. One for staying power, and the other against the banshee's wail. Nat 20 and 15. I told him that he could continue till morning with those rolls. He said he would, and I made him roll for constitution again. The bard spent the next day at 5 HP with a massive headache, and had a new Girlfriend.

[@swytchyglytch]

YES That's awkward! Awkward and PAINFUL! He ain't coming at me with that thing! 😛well, unless I'm drunk 😛

[@majinsole8554]

Death by nut slap is wild 😆 ~_~