What kind of men do you surround yourself with?

[@redtothecore]

I got disciplined in a job when I found that the boss was taking the contact details of barely legal young women, offering them benefits and/or punishments for dates/favours. His male colleagues rallied round him.

[@rejectionisprotection4448]

Oh Lord.

[@BL-sd2qw]

MY GOSH!!! 😱😱

[@janinasaam]

Someone I know was harrassed sexually by their boss and many other men in the company. She was still a minor. And that same company boasted in a documentary, that they are so womenfriendly. She left after she found a new company

[@BL-sd2qw]

Wow, I'm so sorry for your friend. Truly goes to show the whole "tell me what you brag about and I'll tell you what you lack"

[@janinasaam]

@@BL-sd2qw Have to agree

[@JezeBellaMorte333]

The boast is the bait.

[@BL-sd2qw]

@@JezeBellaMorte333 Omg, this! 👆🏽

[@maxm5645]

Fantastic. Thank you. I've been waiting for decades for this conversation.

[@FireSilver25]

Anytime I worked with the public I was s. harassed. Almost every college class I took I was harassed. Stalked. Negged. Humbled. Bullied. By creepy/controlling/fragile/abusive men. And other men, and some women blamed me and made excuses for the creeps when I spoke up. I became self employed at home just to stay safer. I work out at home because gyms are full of creeps. Some guys still found ways to be awful but it was easier to distance myself. I ended up cutting my hair short, ditching makeup, wearing glasses, dressing masculine, and putting on weight to stay safer. Men just suck as a general demographic. I’m glad we’re talking about these things openly now though.

[@BL-sd2qw]

That man gr@ped a woman. You cannot consent if you are drugged. That would have been met with the c-pital p-nishment in a lot of indigenous societies

[@chimericalbeast]

When they say they’re going to get a cab, see what happens when you say “cool I’ll come with you”

[@leafyishereisdumbnameakath4259]

​@@chimericalbeastgreat idea

[@falkland_pinguin]

Yes; yes; why are "a lot of indigenous societies" your go-to moral standard? That last sentence just feels kind of weird here

[@BL-sd2qw]

@@falkland_pinguin Because they are. Seems to me that a society that doesn't even know what gr@pe is is definitely more morally *normal* than one where you have literal gr@pe porn.

[@dallasaranjo9336]

​@@BL-sd2qwTRUTH!!!!

[@sisuguillam5109]

This is the job-version of 'you should have chosen a better man'. People are clueless.

[@JezeBellaMorte333]

Right. Not like we know these things before the experience. Then, if we quit multiple jobs or relationships, we get shamed for going through so many as if we should have skipped them and automatically knew which the right one was.

[@sisuguillam5109]

@@JezeBellaMorte333 Exactly.

[@kirstenwyatt9675]

Previous boss (male) who loved hiring single mothers. "They will do anything 😘 to make sure they keep their job." A different boss at a different job would "set asisde" (throw out) any applications with feminine names. Another different boss at another different job, who made it well known if you didn't come to the "employee appreciation" parties at his house way out in the woods, carpoool only, driven by the male employees, you would likely never get good hours, and definitely never get a good raise/promotion. A different job that had specific cuts and colors of underwear in the dress code for women. For a cubicle office job.

[@BL-sd2qw]

@@kirstenwyatt9675 That's horrifying and terrifying 😱

[@rejectionisprotection4448]

Yikes!

[@leafyishereisdumbnameakath4259]

Are you ok I'm so sorry. That's terrible. What the heck???? How did you survive

[@kirstenwyatt9675]

I survived by being as drab and obtuse as possible, while somehow happening to be in earshot whenever the worst of them tried to get a new victim separated. It is amazing how much simple questions from someone who looks completely clueless can disrupt. "These are some very specific dress code requirements, is there a uniform allotment for this, or are they issued?" "Hey, I know the carpool is to save on parking space on your street, but I have a 10 seater van, so I could drive bunches of us up." Or asking HR about different friends applications, describing their qualifications first, then add the name, and 'just wonder' why so many applications get lost.

[@BL-sd2qw]

@@kirstenwyatt9675 😨😰😭🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@JezeBellaMorte333]

The one job where I worked closely with men, the male boss(his wife was the other boss), a project manager, a few leading technicians and a few techs and junior techs sexually harassed me. Several other men, who didn't harass me, saw them do it and either laughed or kept their mouth shut. I quit because the boss told me I needed to break up with my boyfriend to better my performance at work.

[@thekelderhouse]

I had a boss that use to "brush against me" - ON ME, when there was plenty of room to walk around me.

[@thekelderhouse]

....and I struck him.

[@thekelderhouse]

After telling my husband what was going on. ...until I could no longer wait for my husband to "handle it."

[@anjafrohlich1170]

I'm sorry that happened to you and I lift my proverbial hat because I'm not sure I would've been brave enough to defend my body the way you did. I hope you chipped him a tooth or something.

[@deconstructing7307]

I've been out of a job for a month because I complained to a higher-up that a man sabotaged me. This is after I spent months asking my male manager for help. Silence.

[@manifest2203]

How are these people not seeing how m4n behave? They all treat it as a joke. Like the dude doing this is so cute and his wife being bothered about him and following up on him is so funny.

[@zacharybosley1935]

M4n? Really? Are you ducking the algorithm or something? If i were to guess as to why guys are so reluctant to admit there's a problem, it would have to be because it disrupts their perception of the world being cruel out of necessity. A lot of guys buy into the idea that life is just the way it is, and expending any effort to make it better is pretty much a waste of time when it's more efficient to get what you want at the expense of others. It's a dog-eat-dog world and all that jazz.

[@manifest2203]

@@zacharybosley1935 yes that’s why m4n are getting le5ft behind.

[@manifest2203]

@@zacharybosley1935 and tats exactly why m6en are being left behind.

[@zacharybosley1935]

@@manifest2203 which is pretty likely to lead to a dramatic spike in the ways men will attempt to recoup their standing before we ever achieve a post-patriarchial society

[@zacharybosley1935]

@@manifest2203 are you just having trouble with your touchscreen or something? Why are you censoring "men?"

[@tonyschannel7438]

I don't surround myself with any kind of men, or women, unless I have to. I have aspergers syndrome, social anxiety and i'm an introvert.

[@katjacobs100]

If this wasn’t so common, the bear would not be a thing.

[@OGK-1414]

Well said.

[@tricia2701]

As a nurse in the 70’s and 80’s, one put up with harassment from male doctors, co- workers and patients. Daily. It only stopped , on the job, when I moved into pediatric home care. But out in the world, it only stopped when I reached my 60’s , thank God.

[@xXOFrannieOXx]

Yes.

[@Jac527]

My first ever job in Uk as a student, the work colleague lied to me when I told him I had back pain that he would give me a massage instead of telling me that their was a free chiropractic clinic for student nearby. You guessed it, he r*ped me. When I reported him, I was the one fired but he got to keep his job. Not surprised if he did this to other women too.

[@c.g.bspendersashtray3037]

I'm so sorry. That's horrible. Did you report him to the police? Not that they'd do anything, but having his name on record would help any future victims.

[@7Msmelanie]

Or they HAVE the conversation but find a way to blame that town, that woman, her trauma, her family and the rest are "rare exceptions" 😅 Even the GOOD ones do this, with one exception so far...

[@leafyishereisdumbnameakath4259]

I'm here to listen. Always and forevrr

[@gaylaaustin7468]

None

[@ScottAmbrose-rc2xq]

Wow you did surround yourself with bad people.

[@marv34001]

Genuinely hilarious men. You hang around some demons. lol

[@charleston1789]

It’s sad how you hang around this channel just to say “no you’re wrong”. Why don’t you try and learn something here instead? Try actually listening? Or having these conversations with the women in your life?

[@leafyishereisdumbnameakath4259]

​@charleston1789 I hear you. I beat myself every day for being a man. I only imagine the pain yall go through dealing with us

[@charleston1789]

@@leafyishereisdumbnameakath4259 nobody is asking for guilt or for you to beat yourself up. The need is for this problematic behaviour to be called out, not normalised. Don’t wallow in guilt, it serves absolutely nobody. Be an active ally, actually listen to women, and aim to help the next generations be better than us

[@leafyishereisdumbnameakath4259]

@@charleston1789 yall say all this like I don't already do all that. What is an active ally? Because going to marches n sht doesn't do anything. I call this stuff out all the time on the internet. Real life is trickier. Am I supposed to deescalate situations or stand up for women no matter the cost or only do the latter if the woman is not in direct danger?

[@leafyishereisdumbnameakath4259]

@@charleston1789 ignore my other comment. I deleted it.