What’s The Difference Between Beauty And Hotness?

[@ChrisWillx]

Watch the full episode here - kzbin.info/www/bejne/aXbKY5Vtbtxnh5I

[@Leo-mr1qz]

Audrey Hepburn once said, "True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she longingly gives, the passion that she knows."

[@anikaabida6019]

🤍🤍🤍

[@nikmills]

Very easy for Audrey to say.

[@IMAHMS]

It's called being agreeable.

[@Leo-mr1qz]

@@impudentdomain That reminds of the women who played in the Star Wars movies, and she's in perfume commercials now trying to look sexy; Natile Portman. She has absolutely NO sex appeal whatsoever, yet they try to push it like she does. It's uncomfortable to watch, it's SO wrong!

[@stereofidelic67]

easy for a physically beautiful person to say.

[@nicolelawrence5177]

I have to remind my boys all of the time that beauty isn’t a temperature. I remember feeling immense pressure to show off the goodies when I was in my 20’s. My friends who did got a lot more attention but looking back I got a lot of attention too but from higher quality men who actually cared. I’m grateful my Dad instilled in me self worth and he always said a woman wasn’t truly beautiful till she was in her 40’s because you need that maturity and wisdom to be comfortable in your own skin. I’m now 44 and he was totally right! I feel more beautiful now than at any other point in my life and it shows in confidence and how I care for my body with exercise and meditation. My counter parts who threw it all away in their 20’s look haggard and dried up. It’s really really sad.

[@rat7570]

This comment does not show much maturity but anyways... cool...

[@olegnurmagomedov750]

Are you happily married with children?

[@nicolelawrence5177]

I’m surprised, what came across and immature?

[@nicolelawrence5177]

Yes, I am.

[@ketle369]

Same goes for men too. As a young man I wasn’t bad looking at all, but now in my forties with my humor and high IQ I get a lot more attention from women as these traits seems to raise in value as we get older. Hotness is temporary, beauty lasts forever.

[@sterlingdennett]

Hotness is the kind of sexual attractiveness you would feel uncomfortable appreciating with your parents (or your children) present. Beauty is timeless, the kind of loveliness that speaks to your heart (not just your loins), it is something you can take your parents (or your children) to in order to appreciate it, something you want to immortalize for the ages in paintings or sculptures, something you want to put up on a pedestal forever and show it off to your small children so they can stand in awe of it.

[@middleofdecember9862]

my favorite comment here

[@aphrodisya]

Gosh, this was deep, loved it❤

[@tbmike23]

Almost impossible to quantify, yet I'd recognize it in an instant. I find a cute girl to be far more attractive than a hot one. A hot girl is only appealing some of the time, but cute girls are always cute, when they're sick, when they're mad, all the time you can treasure them.

[@pfunkpjb1]

Creepy

[@existingiscool1442]

@@pfunkpjb1 Damn bro, he's just some dude living his best life, posting comments about cute girls on a podcast about hotness vs beauty, ain't no need to be calling him creepy. We got people out here hiding behind dumpsters and trading blowjobs for a Lotto ticket and some cigarettes, Gollum looking motherfuckers, that shit is creepy, some pretty goods deals half the time though.

[@seabreeze4559]

unless they're faking cuteness to control stupid men

[@Kareena1988]

@@pfunkpjb1 why creepy?

[@jodyjackson5475]

So well said yes

[@oumarh.gassama8063]

It's amazing how so many conversations (just like this one) misses out on some of the major relationship factors: trauma experienced by the individual in their childhood, teenage life, and in adolescent period, as well as transgenerational traumas and all the psychological and emotional packages people carry with themselves. And this is valid for men and women equally. So much effort put in to try to figure out relationship related "secrets" based on looks, where looks are literally just the tip of that proverbial iceberg. Of course looks have a big role to play, but discussing it without the aforementioned factors might lead to false or incomplete conclusions.

[@zalamael]

Yeah, and none of that matters to someone who is thinking with their reproductive organs/hormones. It is only when we get older (and have enough traumatic experience) that we learn to start thinking with our big brains. Saying that though, trauma can be overcome. It is not a done deal. We are not victims of our upbringings, each and every one of us (as individuals) has the power to affect the outcome of our lives. Anyone who refuses to accept that, has already surrendered themselves to an unhappy existence.

[@FlyingcupNsourcer]

@@zalamael I'd like to say that it isn't "thinking with hormones and genitals", it's more like a misguided desire for pleasure over happiness. Happiness is a long term overall feeling from security, a sense of purpose, community, and individuality. Pleasure however, is a short sharp peak, it's like the difference between climate and weather. Indulgent people, that is people who seek excess, tend to be self medicating their overall feelings of depression brought on by trauma. It's seems like smooth brained people think they are big brained and fall into destructive patterns trying to solve/avoid their problems. Some idiots, like me, just needed to find out first hand. And some never learn to pick themselves up after snapping back to reality.

[@marinavasquez8813]

Agree

[@grim_2000]

You can't talk about everything in 10 minutes. Hell, that's a lot of ground to cover even in 3 hours. So people usually talk about one aspect at a time, maybe a few of them, if it's a longer format, but not all at once

[@dreamchaser7603]

So on point!! They have very vague ( almost animalistic) understanding of relationships… This is what happens when people over rationalize instead of living trough their feelings and emotions… it creates many frustrations…

[@erikpaulsen3111]

Beauty is something that ages well. Hotness is a fad.

[@Adhara740]

Seems like hotness has more to do with overt sexuall appeal.

[@OkTxSheepLady]

I almost choked laughing when Chris mentioned nightclub life and “good husband material men”. A good prospect for a husband isn’t going to be out on the town at night. He will either be studying to further his career, engaged in a productive craft, or sleeping so he’s at his best the next day. What woman of quality wants a used man?

[@mrdee2454]

i like your style. the female version waifu material who also exercises in spare time

[@kismet256]

yikes - you know you can enjoy socializing, night clubs , having a few drinks and also have a good career. A "used" man - yes I like men that can balance their life and know how to enjoy themselves. Let loose a little.

[@aakankshasangwan4130]

@@kismet256 I don't even see it as enjoyment. I have been at a club twice total and hated every second both times. The vibe makes me nauseous.

[@kismet256]

@@aakankshasangwan4130 fair enough we are all different. When I use to go to nightclubs I enjoyed them. Having a dance and a few drinks. This was in Dublin Ireland and the vibe was more into having fun.

[@dr.redphdleasurestudies.5399]

Umm... all of them. That's why they are more attracted to a man when he has a girlfriend than when he is alone.

[@AberrantArt]

Beauty has no need for makeup or revealing clothing. Hotness relies on it.

[@hoosiercrypto9955]

@@Senorzilchnzero I concur 😋

[@glennllewellyn7369]

Natalie Wood.

[@hoosiercrypto9955]

@@glennllewellyn7369 I'm 50. Natalie Wood was incredible. Some of her early pictures still make me a bit catatonic 😳

[@bettermanchannel770]

Hottness is temporary and beauty is lasting,

[@marinavasquez8813]

Agree

[@catherineclock4878]

Hotness is low self-esteem attractiveness, while beauty is high self-esteem attractiveness. Women who are beautiful are likely good stewards of their bodies, their appearance, but they don't do it for attention. To be fair to the hot girls, these poor girls are only responding to years of reinforcement in their tweens and teens that tell them that it is the only way they will be loved. It takes confidence to go the beauty route, because you DO lose out on the immediate attention that is going to the hot girls.

[@seabreeze4559]

women can beautiful on the face and hot on the body, we don't choose how we develop beautiful men look preppy gentlemen, hot men look GQ cover chav

[@TheSwissChalet]

Beauty is confident. Hotness is desperate. Beauty is quiet. Hotness is loud. Beauty is calm. Hotness is anxiety. Beauty is timeless. Hotness is vaporous.

[@LanaW123]

Beauty is timeless. Hotness is tastles....sorry. but those tattoos are not my cup of tea.....what are you going to do with them when you get bored in a year????

[@TheSwissChalet]

@@LanaW123 I don't have any tatoos

[@essies4294]

Beauty is also loud and obvious to those who can objectively see it

[@marinavasquez8813]

Agree

[@Sunkissed949]

Exactly. Confidence is quiet. Insecurity is loud

[@5ayes12]

From an aesthetic perspective hotness is on a knife ege with ugliness. Whereas beauty doesn't flip from the two extremes like hotness does

[@alexdebling1564]

Well said. Hotness is skin-deep, but what happens when you shed the skin...

[@Influences]

It’s great to see a man who is attractive and has influence (hopefully) on other men share the idea that classic beauty is timeless and still attractive to men.

[@calevenice]

"In 15 years, is your toddler going to make fun of it (your tattoo)?" Excellent line 🤣

[@richardthompson5514]

A coworker of mine years ago got a big tattoo of his girlfriends name on his chest just below his collar. NORMA. When they broke up he still had the tattoo. As his loyal friends we suggested that he add an L.

[@santosturmio8189]

@@richardthompson5514 now imagine his ex girlfriend was called Ana with one n 🤣

[@JaZmine147]

All toddlers love my tattoos. Even more than adults. 😂

[@lukemadden9690]

Beauty takes much longer to recognize. I’ve known girls and only after spending lots of time with them do I start to find them beautiful. Hot girls I recognize right away

[@marlonmoncrieffe0728]

Yes, I know. It is an incredible psychological phenomenon. People just become more attractive as you relate to them. It just goes to show that physical beauty is not the end-all be-all to finding a mate.

[@MrsNancy1297]

So you never met a beautiful woman that you thought was beautiful right away? Do you think people who are naturally physically pleasing can’t be beautiful, only hot?

[@lope542]

I can tell you ve never met an beautiful person. Beauty hits you right away und you cant take off your eyes. Hot women are everywhere. Beauty is rare. Beauty is perfection

[@Marsha_Ann]

Basically tattoos and piercings suggest that a person is a rebel and unconventional, therefore not bound to conservative norms. So with that perception, people assume you are "interesting" and experimental, with potential to be a "freak" or sexually explicit. A quick try out for men and women to feel excitement for awhile, that's what would be considered "hot".

[@leedlbagginshield8492]

perfectly articulated. That’s also what I associate with tatoos

[@Marsha_Ann]

@@leedlbagginshield8492 but tattoos are no longer rebellious, since everyone and their mother needs to get the most random and vague tattoos anywhere on their body because it's just trendy now. 🙄 I never felt the need to brand my body like cow, but I guess I do still find it hot when guys have em lol Just not all over the face or neck or somewhere crazy. I'm not attracted to piercings either.

[@leedlbagginshield8492]

@@Marsha_Ann totally true. Tattoos have become super mainstream and now have a more “trashy” or cheap reputation. A lot of people also associate tattoos with a lack of emotional stability

[@truthprevails4386]

for those of us that do not fall under either category... thanks for the conversation!

[@devoncooley5505]

That’s funny, same boat brother

[@immortaljanus]

Hotness is about eggs. Biology and nothing else. Beauty is about a person's essence. It's spiritual.

[@saucedupbat]

I love that. Beauty is spiritual.

[@roojistanr5015]

Haha about eggs that made me laugh..but I know what you mean

[@ileanamuntean7338]

Maybe, but some good time girl who drinks a lot, has fake boobs, tattoos and smokes pot is unlikely to have good eggs. Healthy, natural girls who like the outdoors with no vices have good eggs.

[@Divineeyereadings]

What about women who fall in all three categories (hot, beautiful, cute)? People are so quick to categorize people but some people either fit in all categories or neither. Anne Hathaway for an example I can see her being mostly classically beautiful, but she can be hot (Catwoman) and cute (Princess Diaries). So I don't quite agree that you can't imagine her in any way other than classically beautiful

[@SoakintheSchadenfreude]

one is timeless, one is superficial.

[@seabreeze4559]

some women are both like Marilyn

[@AdamStephenTaylor]

I think it signals impulsivity, which is going to be valuable and attractive to people wanting casual sex.

[@M0viLover]

Agreed!!

[@MomoSimone22]

Yes, I agree. And I think it also signals being wild and free.

[@marinavasquez8813]

Agree

[@vaporz109]

@@MomoSimone22 Wild and free is just the glamorous and PC way to describe an impulsive personality that’s less likely to consider the consequences of their actions and generally acts based on their immediate self-centered desires with little regard beyond their own pleasure and instant gratification.

[@MomoSimone22]

@@vaporz109 yes, but wild and free sounds more attractive and fun than being impulsive, which I think is somewhat important in this context.

[@jckorn9148]

Even from a young age, always preferred a girl with natural beauty over some hot girl with a ton of makeup. Think late 90s, Jennifer Love Hewitt and Amy Jo Johnson(pink power ranger). Yea they wear makeup but it's subtle. Even today, they're still gorgeous. Guys marry a girl without ever seeing them without makeup.....that's insanity. We all get old and fat, find someone you connect with emotionally.

[@superwormhalz2607]

Beauty you want to protect and hot you want to use.

[@Acool1011]

Gotta say, I really think it’s more about how little clothes you wear rather than tattoos or piercings. I may be a little biased lol as I’ve got 4 tattoos including a sleeve, however I also got married at 22 (to a guy who also has multiple tattoos) and it’s great. I don’t think the tattoos and stuff like that matter as much as how you dress. I think dressing more modestly shows that you hold yourself to a certain standard and you expect the people around you to as well. If you’ve got tattoos but also enough self-respect to show that not anyone can just get in your pants, I don’t think it’ll be too hard to find a guy who can also respect you, knows you’re beautiful, and appreciates the artwork you have on you.

[@LexaLite]

Pretty much my sentiment especially since tattoos have different significance culturally and over time.

[@leonaj.5835]

You can justify your tattoos however you want to make yourselves feel better about having them, but I see tattoos on western women very negatively, speaking as a Southeast Asian woman where tattoo is part of our culture. It's reduced to cosmetic procedure in the USA just like yoga became "exercise" when it is part of Hindu religion. It is foolishness. Americans have this attitude that it's just "okay" to do things their way & they make fools of themselves doing so, all in the name of freedom. It's not naturally a part of your culture & tradition, especially if you're Caucasian, to have tattoos. Be honest. Most westerners only do it to fit in with their peers at one point, to look cool like getting your ears pierced, and it it always ends up so tacky and cheap. Also, most prostitutes in South East Asia brothels are tattooed by their pimps. It would be stupid of me to get one and be perceived as a hooker in my own region & one complaint by western women with tattoos who come here is that they get mistaken as such. In cultures where tattoos are common & where women have them, it has deep meaning. If it's done the traditional way & not with modern tools, it's even life threatening & you can get sepsis and die. In my tribe, it shows social rank and what family you belong to and which warrior clan. One earns tattoos, not just anyone can have them; we just don't go to a shop and have it done just because we feel like it. Seeing westerners who have them so commonly is really funny and it really screams falsehood, that they are fakes & posers. You're not really being yourselves & you feel like you need to get them to be "different", unique or whatever. It's akin to people having plastic surgery because of their insecurities and can't make it through life with their flaws. What's worse is that a lot of western men with multiple tattoos feel & act like they are tough by having them, when tattoos on men in my culture signify that they killed someone or many people by cutting their heads off. I don't like to be associated with killers & murderers even if my grandpa was one, so I don't have tattoos by choice.

[@Acool1011]

You can view my tattoos however you want but don’t assume you just know stuff about people. I am not American, I am not Caucasian, my culture does involve a history of tattoos. But that’s not really that special, most regions in the world have a history of tattooing in some way or another, have you ever heard of the Caledonians or the Picts? I agree it would be wrong for someone to tattoo on themselves something they haven’t earned, especially if it’s from a history of people or culture they’re not even a part of, but that doesn’t mean it’s right to assume that’s what everyone in the western world are doing. You don’t want tattoos because of what they signify to you, I do want the ones I have because of what they signify to me, maybe can we stop making assumptions and just respect each other’s choices?

[@leonaj.5835]

@@Acool1011 Ashley Canning is a WHITE name since you hate the word Caucasian for some reason plus your profile picture supports what genetic thread you belong in and most of the women don't have them including the queen of England, Scotland & Wales. Claiming to be a long lost descendant of a dead group of people as your own to justify having tattoos of possibly modern day cartoons, TV shows, animate, inanimate objects & names drawn on your body I doubt those native people in Scotland had those in their day 😉 You don't look Maori or Native Aussie to me too and I don't think you're adopted by a tribe. The point is when you get tattoos, expect people to judge you negatively anywhere in the world. It is a mark for a reason but it's only romanticized to sell stupidity to naive people who fall for "art". So when you go to Japan where Yakuza women have them, South Korea and etc. You won't get a job because of them and will be banned from entering a lot of places. Your definition of a woman being beautiful in spite of having tattoos don't apply since most people in the world don't see it that way. I don't even see them beautiful and it is practiced until now in my culture. I am just glad we aren't forced to get them anymore but what is wrong with Westerners to ruin their lives nd healthwith their naivety?

[@beevie4081]

@@leonaj.5835 we aren't all destined to abide by one culture forever. People build cross cultural relationships and good ideas spread. Customs change and mix across generations. Always have, always will. Unless we truly commit to segregation, which I think has some notable downsides.

[@charlo7518]

The real issue is how culture influences our standards of beauty!!

[@seancooper5140]

What came to mind for me (for good or bad, and obviously oversimplified) was: Beauty is something you want to BE with. Hot is something you want to DO with.

[@jonbolton491]

Isn't beauty the umbrella term for concepts such as cuteness, prettiness, elegance, grace, refinement, hotness, etc? In other words, there's no real difference between beauty and hotness. Hotness is a subset of the concept called beauty. Nobody can be beautiful in all the aspects of the word. You be beautiful sexually ( hot), or beautiful in public comportment ( elegance and poise), or beautiful in a way that elicits the feeling of protection ( cute), etc.

[@alelectric2767]

Beauty is more than skin deep.

[@Tarikkb]

There’s a difference between being attractive and being pretty , pretty means nice facial features that one may find good looking , for some people that’s enough in a relationship , But being attractive is more than physical appearance , ofc it also plays a part in it but it is more than that , personality , the way they hold, themselves , the vibe and energy they have ...that makes you curious about this person they attract you

[@rebeccawells6440]

It’s a good discussion but also so conservative.. I agree with some but not all.. I have tattoos and piercings and do get looked at and treated differently for them but to suggest everyone with them is in one frame of mind or group because of it .. is not fair.. I will listen again .. maybe I missed something but I hope that you can realize there are most likely some beautiful humans in beautiful relationships.. which I strive for yet at 49 .. and my tattoos are appreciated by my grandkids 🖤

[@rebeccawells6440]

@James Bond to each his own 💯

[@elisabeth4342]

Sex symbols in their prime, like Halle Berry, Cindy Crawford, Claudia Schiffer, Pamela Anderson, Carmen Electra, Jenny McCarthy, Sophia Vergara, Salma Hayek, Angelina Jolie, Dianne Carroll, Nicolette Sheridan (remember her?), Kim K, Britney Spears, Beyonce, etc.. had BOTH factors-- stereotypical beauty and innate hotness. There are other examples but I can't list everyone (lol). Tats/piercings just represent a certain personality type-- usually the party girls. There are exceptions though. They can be used to bring more attention to oneself.

[@heimskrskyrim6516]

Here's a thought about this topic.....Hotness is Beauty without Virtue. Women are best when they are"Good, True, and Beautiful". Real Beauty contains something completely good and truthful. Hotness does not carry the truth, as it is made to look beautiful but it's done with clothing, makeup, and body positioning. Hotness is also not good because the hot girl is out to get you. Hotness is just beauty with nothing else to offer. And hotness is the lie that horny men fall for. Just as clueless women fall for the arrogant man thinking he is confident.

[@jliA7]

I agree with this! Hotness only imitates beauty with clothing, makeup etc. But it will always look more fake and unnatural. Beauty is obvious, it is timeless and something that everyone can see. It is not complicated and it doesn't require explanation. It is always the same, with or without makeup. I also think beauty has virtue and also this certain purity. Hotness doesn't appear pure.

[@seabreeze4559]

ironic the guy talking is a chav, hot but not handsome degenerates judging other degenerates lol

[@essenceocean595]

You couldn’t be more correct. We should all be following beauty, goodness, and truth and seeking mates that are doing the same thing. But it’s easier to find a pretty shell with nothing in it than one with a pearl. And those who aren’t lazy are afraid. They fear the truth, destroy beauty, and falsify and undermine truth. The greatness we could have achieved if we’d have put the energy we do into evil instead into good.

[@FutonJohn]

Hotness is a fun time for a short time. Beauty is good time for a long time.

[@luvmichellele]

Thanks Chris, this video was amazing! Its a wonderful perspective and an important lesson to teach young women of today's modern society who prefer to strive for sexyness/hotness often shrugging off morals and values to do so (assuming they had any to begin with). As opposed to striving for beauty in which they can maintain their morals and values, and become respectable adults in society.

[@lauralulu7290]

I'm flummoxed that people still exist who believe that folks wear jewelry or get tattoos for the purpose of advertising sexual availability, or that said accessories or body art generally have any sound predictive ability regarding one's suitability as an employee or a partner.

[@corrinadeluxe4141]

This whole conversation makes me nauseous. What a way to oversimplify & undervalue women.

[@MsChitterchat]

Most men would just be grateful for a woman. I’ve been called hot and beautiful. Happy with both thanks.

[@saucedupbat]

It's like healthy food and junk food... I'm not saying hot people are junk, but, like junk food, hotness is there for immediate pleasure... and how many of us would easily resist that temptation? Beauty, on the other hand, is like an exercise of seeing into the beyond. Like eating a diet of healthy food, appreciation of beauty is a kind of discipline... a disciplining of the unruly, carnal impulses. There's a kind of transcendental/spiritual quality to it. I assume that the huge trend of choosing hotness over beauty has to do with most young people being spritually uncultivated.

[@chayalibapamensky4347]

Wow that's amazing your makeing this clear the difference between hotness and beauty!

[@zero-fox-given]

Evolutionarily, I think hotness is more geared towards playfulness, youthfulness and virginity; red lipstick, mascara, ponytail etc., and beauty more towards maturity and being able to be a good mother, beauty doesn't rely too much on artificial items like makeup and jewelry.. Tattoos and piercings I think are more associated with a punky culture, being a 'bad' girl or being 'freaky' or 'naughty'. A choker is a more subtle beauty item, and implies more of a subservience and sweetness in a house-wife kind of way, an "I'll do anything for you" without being obviously slutty or necessarily 'hot' right away, and walks a more fine line with hotness and beauty.

[@danielleoconnell5417]

I think tattoos and piercings are hot to other people because it signals danger and exciting ,spontaneous,outgoing,sexy,cool,bad ass lol signals confidence mainly and that’s what attracts people.

[@haroldmerewether1224]

Beauty is unaltered. Meaning attractive without makeup or fancy hair.

[@bigb853]

Nothing wrong with wanting to look your best but when that becomes all you have to offer...then it is a problem. Plus subtly is a very underacted skill.

[@raymondtendau2749]

I might be wrong but I think Hotness is being associated with Sexually appealing .The Hollywood version of beauty is hotness.

[@lisbetsoda4874]

Yes and no. There are definitely Hollywood actresses that are beautiful. They usually get to the top. And their exterior is beautiful by our standards. To go with old icons, Marilyn Monroe was hot, Grace Kelly was beautiful. Currently, too many of the true beauties ruin their looks by not aging more gracefully. Some of them even resort to "hotness" in desperation for attention as their outstanding beauty fades. Compare Helen Mirren to Jane Fonda. Jane Fonda is trying to stay "hot". External beauty does usually belong to the young but it definitely ages better than "hotness"

[@marinavasquez8813]

@@lisbetsoda4874 agree

[@marinavasquez8813]

Correct🎯

[@raymondtendau2749]

@@marinavasquez8813 🙏🏾

[@mattbray_studio]

i'd say that tattoos and piercings are signals of openness to sexual encounters, because they are signals that the person is 'naughty'. to put it in childish language, good girls and boys dont get tattoos and piercings, so you know if someone has those things they are slightly more adventurous.

[@WhatTheFragrance]

Hotness- sex appeal youthful. Mass appealing looks Eg Megan Fox Pretty- face naturally without makeup. Eg Margot Robbie or Emma Watson Cute-innocent subtle sweet and caring Vanessa Hudgens Beautiful- in the eye of the beholder, most subjective. Not necessarily mass appealing. Most similar to liking art Eg Anna Taylor Joy I believe both men and women fall into these categories we should lean into what we are and not try to become something else. Then you will be your most attractive. One isn't better than the other

[@meef1610]

Beauty is Truth - Hot is Temptation

[@peachesandcream8753]

The problem most women face nowadays is that they are learning how to sexualise themselves from childhood, sexual images are everywhere, and as a girl you are forced to think about how you fit in that ideal version of sexiness because women naturally compare themselves to others. When you see girls who fit that ideal, or who wear certain clothes, getting the attention that you also want, because girls naturally want to attract boys, it becomes a very quick race to the bottom. Our culture is obsessed with sex, pleasure and quick-fixes, instead of the slow-burn, because it is exciting and flashy. Beauty is the slow-burn, it doesn't come with instant gratification or attention, but instead comes with respect and virtue. Sexiness is flashy, it gets you the attention you crave, but it doesn't come with genuine attraction, love or respect; you are just the new version of the hot girl who is up for anything and since you lack the self-respect you go along with it. I think there is a correlation of fatherless homes with women needing, and liking, this quick attention from men (thanks feminism and the sexual revolution!). Women who didn't grow up with a father never knew what male attention was like, or what a healthy male love was, or what boundaries to have with men, and then they become a woman all of a sudden, who now have men fawning all over them but they don't know how to handle it or what is good attention from bad.

[@jacksmithers8575]

Beauty makes you love, hotness makes you lust. Those with low chakra lust and see beauty as weak, something to rape into lust. Those of high chakra love, see beauty as value, hotness as short-term because dangerous.

[@cjwhite2631]

Fool

[@AmbrociousXP]

I'm a classical gay guy and Chris Williamson is the type of husband I wish I had. His male beauty is outstanding!

[@mrshadenoughofallthis911]

When I met my husband (in the 90s) he said ‘You are the only girl in Brighton without either a tramp stamp or a belly button piercing, or both’.

[@cassondras1435]

Hmm this was very interesting. I found it interesting how he said for him feels wrong to make a beautiful girl hot in terms of dressing different and trying to mold them into that category in general. I just got called very beautiful by another girl yesterday and it made me very flattered. I am not overly feminine, I dont wear makeup, wear dresses, skirts, etc. but to be recognized for my beauty in itself means a lot. I honestly would feel out of place wearing overly feminine clothes and wearing chokers and piercings… definitely not me. Some girls pull it off but its not for all. Just because girls can wear clothes that can make them more hot, doesnt mean they should. Girls should just be recognized for their beauty alone, without all the other distractions. But there will always be beautiful and hot girls. Its just how the world is.

[@nikmills]

Being as I am sixty one I didn't know there was a distinction between these two terms. I'm guessing in the language of my era hot means "sexy" and a maybe "slutty." And beautiful is just "beautiful." My mother, in her 50's and 60's era, called the hot girls "sexpots" and the beautiful ones simply, "charmers." I've heard men referred to as "hot." Is that a totally different meaning?

[@beevie4081]

As far as I can tell 'hot' has the same meaning when applied to men, but 'beautiful' men is a bit less clear and can at least sometimes imply they are feminine. Not sure why.

[@MichaelPohoreski]

Hotness = outside visuals Beauty = inner values

[@essies4294]

No, beauty is an aesthetic meassure

[@MichaelPohoreski]

@@essies4294 Found the person who hasn't been married for years.

[@reyPiti]

@@MichaelPohoreski values are values and beauty is beauty

[@marinavasquez8813]

Agree

[@nadie2795]

Beauty goes on, hot has a limited lifespan

[@Drewchris]

Beauty is definitely the feminine in a women and hotness is what the human eyes perceives

[@joechewter1322]

I remember in history of art looking at 'the girl at the folies-bergere' by Manet. The black choker was a symbol of prostitution in those days so no suprise that the connotation is still with us in some way!

[@TheLifeOnHigh]

I think we’re making too much of a big deal of “hotness vs beauty.” Human sexual attraction is very complex but it’s also very primal in nature. Females of all species seek the same attributes for companionship when it comes to males. They want superior genes for mating and offspring. Strength and wealth for security and protection. It’s easy to dissect what women want but it’s a bit complicated with men in my humbled opinion. Men are visual creatures who are easily turned on by variety. However it doesn’t always translates to what they will deem suitable for a wife or long term mate.

[@seabreeze4559]

men are not visual creatures, women are otherwise men would care about fashion, makeup, home decor lechery is not visual, it's crude r/k selection theory or sexual strategy answers this

[@seabreeze4559]

nope, totally wrong r/k selection, sexual strategy there are two types: short and long

[@zigzig9938]

I can agree that being attractive and beautiful is too different things. About tattoos… I have 1, but I only put it on to cover my scar on my back, because didn’t want it to be visible. I have another ugly scar on my hand and, maybe, put a covering tattoo on that one as well. I think some small tattoos are beautiful, but too much isn’t attractive at all.

[@bartoszlubczonok2941]

The forgotten thing is that beauty is actually hotter than hotness. Hotness is usually not that hot. And beauty is the hottest.

[@stevecrane6163]

Hotness and beauty - more fundamentally put is LUST and LOVE. The two are mutually exclusive. Lust is what YOU get while LOVE is what YOU give and expect no reward for giving. Many times LOVE given is unreciprocated or more succinctly put unrequited but if you are expecting a return from the act of LOVE then you do not understand the basic nature of it. LOVE is freely given and that act of selflessness is in fact its own reward.

[@Bitterrootbackroads]

Which Darkhorse episode was it where this was discussed? That was the first time I heard of the hot vs beautiful concept. Bret Weinstein, like always, applies evolutionary tactics to it that made me think a lot deeper about it. Maybe it’s my age, but this is the first time I’ve heard that tattoos & piercings are considered “hot”. My kind of hot is considerably more subtle.

[@seabreeze4559]

r/k selection theory aka sexual strategy and you can't switch later this guy is a chav, r-type tight shirt, hot but not handsome

[@raywalteroutdoors]

Saw it discussed on Rogan its a good topic.

[@i_am_thebatman]

Beauty is Margot Robbie describing how she took all the money she made in Hollywood to pay off her Mom’s Mortgage to ease her stress she’d been facing for years and show her she loved her Hotness is Amber Heard Walking around in Cutoff shorts in the movie Drive Angry Choose wisely brothers.

[@cosmicdancer6169]

To be or not to be is the question, too many people are simply not Being and put on masks confusing it for beauty. Beauty doesn’t have to do anything it just exists. Hotness has to try hard

[@clwaid5407]

My daughter has a lot of tattoos, including a full sleeve. I hate tattoos, especially on women, and I am a woman. That said, I believe my daughter got her tattoos to hide and be accepted. She doesn't have a neck or chest tattoo, is married to a wonderful young man and has a great job in medicine. Go figure because I said everything you said, and she defied the norms.

[@jamescassar5348]

Only thingmi didn't agree with is the comment on being respectable on Monday without the tattoo. I look respectable every day and I have shit loads of tattoos. Do they make a person look more hot? Yes, one of the reasons my current girlfriend saw me attractive. Has nothing to do with open relationships and threesoms

[@hareth3911]

Hotness is between beauty and pornothings , it’s not wrong but it’s on the edge of wrong , it represents dangerous which we need sometimes

[@Foxie770]

Wish more people would discuss this openly and discourage young people from throwing their lives away by getting trashy tattoos that make them look low class. It advertises a look of not caring for oneself, not valuing yourself or the perception of others about you.

[@eesynopsis7393]

Totally disagree. Tattoos can be a form of artistic self expression and they can be interesting and a lot of fun. Why would I live my life around the notion of caring about others perceptions of me? I only care about the ones that matter most to me in my life. A truly open minded individual has every right to dislike the aesthetic of them but ultimately wouldn't care if they loved me for who I am. A tattoo is not who I am. It is literally a permanent art piece on my skin.

[@DeadSabbath806]

@@eesynopsis7393 There have been studies that tattoos INCREASE your chances of getting a job, so to a great extent tattoos are gonna become a symbol of conformity and, forgive hyperbole, tattoos will probably become mandatory in our lifetime lol

[@GeoFry3]

About a decade. Hotness at 20....beauty at 30. If she is still trying to hold onto "hotness" and hang with the younger crowd past 25, cat lady by 40.

[@sheimahassanlou9564]

Súper intriguing subject. Thank you!

[@psychicsoul3527]

Beauty is more in ward, and reflected through your aura and vibe from your soul, and all that do. Make you attractive but also. Being attractive is more than. Facial features. Even though you with good facial feature will be called attractive but but being attractive has variety and as well beauty. Both are subjective and both are two sides of one coin what you find beautiful personally you find it attractive.

[@XxkeziexX]

I think sometimes its nothing to do with the tattoos and piercings and more to do with the meaning the wearer gives to them too. I have a few, some big due to working at a studio when I was younger, and because I dont make "being tattooed" part of my identity, a lot of people have commented to say how they forget I even have them. The only time people comment are when they try to spark up a low investment conversations around something physical, and I just dont make a big deal about having them so they usually just walk off again.

[@MsChitterchat]

This is just sexist bs. And I’m no woke feminist. I’ve noticed this stuff is cultural and classist. It takes all sorts. There are men who are willing to see past how a woman presents herself. There are societal pressures on how a woman ‘should look’. In my experience English middle class guys the most judgemental.

[@koul3709]

You are the only one with 2 braincells in this comments section. As if "appearance" is the revelation of the essence in a woman. Women aren't their looks--they're PEOPLE. Humans. Men still don't get it. Women have a soul that goes much deeper than anything they look like or resemble. Men cannot help but to objectify us. Is there some kind of mental deficit in not comprehending this?

[@opalminx8240]

This is extremely sexist like how what a stranger assumes of me is what I am worth?

[@Rosshannah1695]

Good conversation, there are plenty of beautiful girls, who I don't see in a sexual manner, and of course others who just seem to exude a sexuality, which some know about and play on, whilst some others don't see, or seem to go out of their way to make themselves 'ugly' at least to my own perception of these unexplainable values. Personally, tatoos and piercings are a complete turn off, so I'm automatically out.

[@crztank9298]

I've experienced both your examples. One ex gf was by most people's standards, a solid 7. To me there was a raw sexual attraction that drove me insane to be honest. It was the smell of her hair and skin and sweat, curves of her body, giggle, everything. On the other hand ive had relationships where I've fallen in love because of who they were on the inside.

[@Rosshannah1695]

@@crztank9298 yes, agree completely, some girls can be "perfection" whilst not looking like the marylin monroe type. I put certain girls on pedestals far too easily, whilst the "plainer" girls are easier to talk to or interact with! I think it's all to do with our own inner confidence though. At 56 I can talk to anyone, whereas at 26 I couldn't....very low self esteem. But at the end of the day, some girls DO just push all your buttons, don't know why, but when that happens I'm a 16 years old gibbering fool. All the best from a dreich Scotland.

[@77Tadams]

Never got the tattoo. Did get a navel piercing and my husband at the time hated it. I ended up taking it out after 3 months. Glad I didnt get a face piercing or extra ear piercings. The extra ear piercings where really in in the 90s too. Everyone had extra holes in their ears and I never did it. Glad I kept it basic with all of it. Nothing to regret really. I was one they always figured would end up with tons of piercing and tats too! I was a very experimental girl....clothing and hair I changed all the time. That you can change easy.

[@LittleBoxXx]

I think Hotness is more like how the person moves, the gestures, the physical attributes of course, and beauty is more like something you can apreciate if its standing still. Not sure if I made any sense lol.

[@freespeech7747]

I would go for beauty every time

[@judeleese7783]

Hmm..I was a punk and wore a dog collar…It was a sign of constraint then…to me…I guess I was a conservative punk rocker..hahah it was about the look not the sexual connotation… although will argue otherwise…That was just me. So, don’t just think that its a signal for promiscuity …well..not in every case it’s not.. but times have changed I guess..😅😟

[@viktoriyarts]

Beauty is individual and has more range in a lot of aspects, hotness is just based on arousal. I feel sad for both men and women who try their hardest to be likeable, they go to the gym, decorate themselves with tattoos or whatever. You don't need to do that, it's actually attractive only to other people who do it too, a tribe of desperation lol

[@spidgeb3292]

You know the difference when you see it. You just do.

[@irisf.5575]

Beauty is from within. Hotness is the outer package.

[@5xdoodlesportchampion329]

Beauty has no obvious use; nor is there any clear necessity for it. Yet civilization could not do without it. - Sigmund Freud

[@thegram9207]

Beauty is head over heels . Hotness is heels over head .

[@dina113east]

Beauty is something many man are afraid of. Maybe that is why many men prefer hot.

[@dina113east]

@@emmamusic4600 You can ask a man. Some may tell you. I've been told things like, a beautiful woman is out of their league, or they could not maintain what it takes to keep the interest of a beautiful woman.

[@Sale195]

I always differentiated between hotness and cuteness (my favourite)

[@marzby_luvz8455]

Beauty is illuminated... hotness is forced

[@saucedupbat]

This is one of the things I notice in the kind of men I usually get infatuated with. Men with beautiful auras... that is, men with a slightly feminine streak... and yet, I have a hard time thinking they're HOT. Though, personally, I'd never choose a hot guy over someone I find beautiful.

[@ileanamuntean7338]

So right. They are looking for a live inflatable doll and girls are looking for some tall bloke with muscles and tattoos.

[@angelicaporter7436]

NOT THE FUTURE TODDLER COMMENT that got me lmao

[@kkorova]

I’m sorry… how in the hell are tattoos associated with polyamory? I just associate them with bad decisions and low wage blue collar jobs 😂😂😂

[@amybarlow3045]

It’s a real destructive problem we are bringing on ourself

[@bennrangphet7590]

The comment section is elite

[@Djurel]

I laughed at the black belt at the wedding crack, even if Geoffrey didn’t.

[@dr.redphdleasurestudies.5399]

What's the difference between beauty and hotness? Same as the difference between "Mr. Right" and "Mr. Right Now."

[@rabiyahelle9102]

I think people that get tattoos and people that wouldn’t are different in character. It’s more creative,more impulsive, more doesn’t worry about long term implications. Like that. That’s why they are associated with low levels of commitment etc

[@dfinma]

So easy -- hot is overt sexual demonstration and availablity whereas beauty is more subtle and you don't have to show off for attention.

[@Musika1220]

My take on it : a man's choice shows IMMATURITY for Hotness and MATURITY for Beauty

[@NRTSean]

Beauty inspires and draws out the imagination (Lust may be part of it but it is not the only factor)... Beauty moves forward... Hotness creates a reactionary mindset... But Beauty works in good or bad ... I know that this is an over used group but Nazi's had a real appreciation for Beauty in art, as well as the money ... What leads to that inspiration of Beauty is a different conversation entirely

[@yeah6281]

In my opinion, beauty is love while hotness is lust. Beauty have that innocent, demure, purity manifestation while hotness is the sexualize, fierce, bloody effect. If we're talking about women, a beautiful woman is someone who gave the heaven feeling while a hot woman gives that hell of a sexual feeling that a man is willing to risk. Most men wants to have sex with a hot woman but will marry a beautiful woman yet will cheat for a hot woman.

[@raeannaroylance5401]

💐classic beauty💐