What's the WORST Sword?

Let's forget the heated debates about which is the best sword in history for a moment... What about the most awful? What about designs that were trash talked even back in the day, centuries ago?
Here are a few examples of what is/was often considered bad, and my take on what's the most terrible of all.
What did the First Swords Look Like?
• What did the First Swo...
** Sources / credits **
Napoleonic British Spadroons: Was the 1796 an IMPROVEMENT on what went before? by @scholagladiatoria
• Napoleonic British Spa...
Why you are wrong about Spadroons by ‪@AcademyofHistoricalFencing‬
• Why you are wrong abou...
commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Fi...
commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Fi...
commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Fi...
www.bukowskis.com/en/lots/104...
commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Fi...
upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...
john-banks.blogspot.com/2015/...
combatarchaeology.org/the-rorb...
upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...
/ need_some_help
Outro music:
"Highland Storm" by The Slanted Room Records
theslantedroom.github.io/stev...
Used with artist's permission
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#skallagrim #sword #saber #history #worst

[@ItsDaKoolaidDude]

The worst sword i think is the one that fails to do anything that it's *_supposed_* to do.

[@GaelicMongrel2023]

So the 1796 Pattern Spadroon?

[@TheDarkplace]

The one that breaks on you?

[@Unknownagon]

sooo essentially most wall-hanger and mall ninja swords then

[@jimbob3332]

It's me. I am the worst sword.

[@jaketheasianguy3307]

@@Unknownagon Wallhangers are suppose to be on your wall to decorate your wall.

[@Dan-Ky-Kong]

"What's the worst sword?" Some sword lover guy: "Whatever culture's sword I feel like making fun of today."

[@robertlewis6915]

A French katana, then.

[@DwarfInBlues]

@@robertlewis6915 A curved baguette?

[@robertlewis6915]

@@DwarfInBlues A differentially cooled baguette- fresh on the insider curve, stale on the outside curve.

[@gf-nw6no]

*stares at the pile of heated metal sheet that uruk hai calls a sword

[@robertlewis6915]

@@gf-nw6no The swords actually have some bevel and form (with that back-spike). Can't find pictures, but I imagine the hilt had some leather-wrap, so not good but not just sheet metal.

[@isaacdoggart4879]

If I am fighting an armored knight with a poleaxe then a small sword would actually be one of my first choices; It's short and light so it's not going to encumber me while I run away from the guy with the polearm and 50 pounds of metal armor.

[@SudsyMedusa53]

"Oi! Get back here, thou cowardly bastard!"

[@UndeadGhostGirl]

Ah yes, one of the most powerful battlefield strategies known to man; picking your battles.

[@gangrenousgandalf2102]

​@UndeadGhostGirl And not trying to fight the guy covered in metal carrying the murder pole

[@sinisterswordsman25]

Well that one way of doing it. And you don't have to drop your sword, well played old boy

[@guntertorfs6486]

@@SudsyMedusa53 Nay !

[@zacharyhiland300]

The worst sword is NO sword. Showing up to a sword fight with just your fists makes for a really bad day.

[@Kayther33]

Ask Khajits

[@socmonki]

Tell that to Captain America in Chivalry 2...

[@nightsong81]

By that argument, the best sword is usually a gun.

[@Imperiused]

"Beware the swordsman who carries no blade." - Proverb

[@ArifRWinandar]

Worse than no sword is something that looks like a sword but doesn't work like a sword is expected to.

[@lemoncandy2707]

“Hey, you see those warriors from Denmark? They’ve got flint swords! Flint… swords.”

[@GholaTleilaxu]

They've even got flint curved swords. Flint. Curved.

[@Seriously_Unserious]

@@GholaTleilaxu This statement along with lemoncandy's made me think of Flint Fireforge, a character I've not thought of in a long while, and he was the first high fantasy dwarf character I read in the classic Dragons of Autumn Twilight.

[@jedijudoka]

Aw wish I scrolled before posting my comment, you beat me to it lol

[@Seriously_Unserious]

@@jedijudoka well, you could always post about Tanis Half-Elven. Oh, wait, I just did, but maybe one of the other Companions... Which of the OG Companions is your favorite?

[@eyeballpapercut4400]

Big Black Copenhagen stonesword

[@Smeelio]

I guess wall-hangers could be disqualified in the same way as those really early flat-handled probably-not-for-use swords, in that they aren't 'swords' in the sense of 'weapon you put into people', but rather intended for ceremony or display

[@julietfischer5056]

I wonder if those early swords weren't for religious/magical use, or as awards or similar tokens of achievement. Sleeping with an iron knife under the pillow is/was a way to keep away the 'Night Hag' or 'Night Witch,' and I can imagine ancient peoples making weapons against things that go bump in the night. Put them under the threshold or build them into a wall, or simply place them in specific parts of the dwelling, to protect the inhabitants from spirits or demons.

[@Kezarus]

The end screen at the very beginning made me laugh so hard that I jump scared my cat unintentionally. XD

[@justskip4595]

Can you give me timestamp? I can not locate the thing you are talking about.

[@Kezarus]

@@justskip4595 it's right at 30s of the video. =]

[@justskip4595]

@@Kezarus That is the end screen? Been watching this channel since... 1016? Never gave a singe thought for it.

[@Seriously_Unserious]

As Right Said Fred put it, "Poor pussy, poor pussy cat!"

[@joshuabates2200]

I live with someone who made guns for a living, said individual declared that the absolute worst guns ever made were so poorly constructed that they would actually explode in the users face upon the very first trigger pull.

[@markfergerson2145]

The “worst sword” parallel would then be any sword that suffered catastrophic failure at first use. That would come down to poor metallurgy or construction, or both. We’ve all seen videos from sword tubers on sword tests that resulted in breakage or “unplanned rapid disassembly” of swords of many designs from many eras. But for me ergonomics is a very big deal. A sword that doesn’t fit anybody’s hand or is unable to deliver effective cuts or thrusts due to spectacularly poor design should also qualify. The gun parallel might be the infandous Zip22 which you may be familiar with. If you’re not, look to Forgotten Weapons for a video on it.

[@notsans9995]

​@@markfergerson2145in a way, I guess you could say early Japanese swords were the worst, there's lots of storys and records from the Heian period that tell of whole armies coming back after every battle with broken swords, until one group of smiths managed to refine the process and design what would become the Katana.

[@PJDAltamirus0425]

@@markfergerson2145 Yeah, that thing is so poorly designed you risk shooting one of your fingers off everytime you have to cock it.

[@seriousmaran9414]

That was why early guns were proofed, fired while those testing it stayed well back. That does not guarantee they wouldn't still fail after a few shots. Gunners were involved in a dangerous activity.

[@potatosordfighter666]

@@markfergerson2145 If there was a zip22 equivalent for swords you would have to press your finger against the blade to release it (cocking the zip22 requires pressing in levers in front of the barrel), and it got stuck in everything it hit (zip22 is a jam factory), would snag worse if you tried to sharpen it (zip22 hates non stock mags), only had a handle large enough for 3 fingers (zip22 grip is only long enough for 3 fingers), and was so dull it couldn't go through anything (zip22 is .22lr, one of the weakest bullets ever). I can't even imagine how a sword could be equivalently shitty IRL. You would genuinely have to put effort into making it as useless as possible, and only a sword in the most generous definition.

[@silverseer573]

For some reason, I find the "hammered in a few hours" dussacks kind of charming. Not saying they'd be GOOD, mind you, but I like the "attacking orc tribe" simplicity of it.

[@embodimentofgreatness5514]

same, and if one were to put the slightest amount of effort into fashioning the handle, im sure it would be quite effective

[@danielcox7629]

I like to think of it as a german machete.

[@kristian1545]

It is the best kind of sword if your village is being raided in 2 hours and you are out of wood to make spears

[@akumaking1]

Can you explore the weapons and armor in “Delicious in Dungeon”?

[@einfangirl2351]

oooh i like that one esspecially with the living amour

[@Razzrazz90]

Dude hell yes that would be amazing

[@fynnmollenhauer1460]

Support!

[@balwgar92]

See him try to use a 40lb wok as a shield

[@Skallagrim]

I've never heard of that. What is it?

[@CDKohmy]

Nick Thomas of AHF clarified that the complaints against the spadroon were pointed towards the off-the-shelf spadroons that were sold at tailors for officers.

[@sinisterswordsman25]

I do wonder if they weren't for use as weapons. We may look at them now and think "that thing looks derp, there's no way it was supposed to be a weapon." But at the time? Just saying

[@CDKohmy]

I think they were intended as weapons, but due to the rise in pistols, people stopped using them practically, and makers responded in kind by making tailor models to cut costs.

[@sinisterswordsman25]

@@CDKohmy lol oh dude I somehow replied to the wrong comment 😂 yes of course spadroons were intended as weapons

[@matthewpham9525]

@@CDKohmy The weird part is that pistols improved greatly after 1796, but so did swords. The 1897 Pattern sword for example was quite nice, as a whole and could be built rather heavily.

[@fluppet2350]

So a similar situation to American cavalry despising the sabre because they had mediocre ones that were not sharp since they didn’t know how to properly sharpen them or didn’t have the tools to, they ended up being useless.

[@pokemon1895]

You know, I honestly wouldn't have complained if the video ended after that intro, lol. That said, this was, as usual, a nice discussion on the topic.

[@TheArklyte]

5:20 The history of those scandinavian flint "swords" reminds me of chinese warlord era "Wauser" pistols. Or Khyber Path guns

[@MrJimodoom]

very fun dude, love the flippant and humorous approach to these questions

[@Ragd0ll1337]

The camera cuts and angle switches are a neat touch! Loving the documentary vibe

[@PossumReviews]

A better question would be, "what's the worst sword for it's intended purpose or situation?"

[@ironox8480]

I am not sure which is worse, the tri blade thingy from Sword and the Sorcerer. Or, Kurgans sword which had the entire sword in parts that needed to be slotted together.

[@barryelverson9486]

My thoughts went to those, but also a ton of anime and cartoon sword designs. He-Man’s sword for example.

[@sinisterswordsman25]

Tri blade is worse Imo. But the build your own sword is pretty inconvenient gotta admit. "Just hold on a second, I gotta put my sword together first... no? You're just gonna stab me now? You dick..." lol

[@sinisterswordsman25]

@@barryelverson9486 he man's sword is not even in running dude. Think about it. Guts dragon slayer weights 200lbs or whatever lol ok then good luck. Just saying. He man's sword is pretty reasonable

[@alexmcgilvery3878]

Maybe the worst sword is the one you left at home when you got attacked by brigands? Great video..

[@kovona]

That's not a bad sword, just a bad swordsman.

[@gaoth88]

I once bought some copper from a merchant of Ur, seemed like a decent chap at first, but then the copper was late, bad quality and he mistreated my servant 0/10, would not buy there again.

[@ddm4life915]

Hey Skall! Could you make a video about times you’ve had the most fun on your channel? Like a look back at your favorite sparring session, cutting tatami, silly video ideas, etc. I think that would be really cool!

[@Seriously_Unserious]

That one would be obvious, the video where he first introduced the "end him rightly" meme to the world. A pommel for YOUR thoughts?

[@evanfishsticks8010]

"The more people that have access to writing, the more ideas get written down and preserved, and that includes complaints." Good to know they had the Internet back then.

[@Seriously_Unserious]

The first internet was pen and paper. Then came the Printing Press, then the Type Writer, and finally the home computer and at long last -- The Internet and the best form of decentralized mass discourse we've had so far.

[@comradewindowsill4253]

I mean, recall to mind and memory the worst copper merchant ever known

[@dlatrexswords]

Great discussion Skall! Just like 'best', worst is a hard title to pin to sword designs. Your topic did remind me of a historical discussion, which hopefully you will get a kick out of. 14th century furusiya author Ibn Hudayl (full nameAbu-I-Hassan Ali ibn Abd-ar-Rahman al-Farazi al-Andalus) wrote military treaties starting ~1359, and covering a variety of topics. When discussing the usefulness of swords, he helps reinforce his point by relating this story: And a Bedouin asked his two sons which sword was the best for them. The first replied: "The one of polished edge, the one of a sharp cut, resolute and long; that when brandishing, does not err; when it gives, it does not bounce." The other said: "A good sword you have described, but the one I prefer is another." "And what is it?" They asked him. And he answered: "The one of a sharp edge, of a shining brightness, always hungry and thirsty, that to the swung, it cuts, and when finding, it kills". He asked them now which sword was the worst. And one replied: "The one that eases and bounces and rejects the bones and the flesh, the one that when it hits, does not cut and to behead is useless". Then I ask the other one who answered: "You have described a bad sword! But the WORST one for me is not like that". Asked, then, how it was, he replied: "The blunt, the rusty, unsafe handle, and no matter how hard you try, you do not bleed." =)

[@Crangaso]

LMFAO - The short parody intro video was real good.

[@bdjcasar8357]

I enlisted in the Infantry in 1993, and all the old-boys complained, at length, and frequently, about how the C-7 was inferior to the C1A1 FAL - it was plastic, it was prone to feeding issues, it jammed because it had a GIS system that wasn't as good as the piston driven action of the FNFAL...- The laundry list went on and on. It was the worst rifle the Canadian Military ever used...Now, I seriously doubt any Canadian soldier would ever say the C-7 was a subpar rifle. PS: Those dussacks were farm tools. They were made to be farm tools. Not weapons. You could argue the worst polearm is a re-purposed scythe because its blade is too thin for combat...Yes, because its blade was made to cut wheat. The dussack/tessack was a farmer's long-knife, meant to cut slash or rope or butcher an animal. It was not meant to be a weapon. It was improvised as one. End rant.

[@julietfischer5056]

Or the name's been over-used. The peasant levy would have brought their most weapon-like tools with them, and maybe someone of higher rank saw some of those tools in action and thought "We need combat versions." Hence the pole-arms and flails, and possibly dussacks and kriegsmessers.

[@Cory_]

The answer is "your favorite one".

[@googlehepimizifisliyor2968]

The good old "your waifu is a hoe" answer.

[@Chroma710]

all warfare is based on trolling. - Sun Tzu

[@KingBongHogger]

8:38 good lord, man. That thing would snap if you sneezed hard enough.

[@bentrieschmann]

I have one of those Victorian Wallhangers you showed. Beautifully made for show. It might work ok in a thrust, but that is it.

[@robertpatter5509]

I own two Spadroons. One is the 1796 Heavy Cavalry Officer Spadroon. Its single edged, sharp and a full shell guard. Made in 1800-1820 in Solingen. A great example. It even had gold on the blade. It can give worrying cuts. The thrust is good for a 16oz( 454 grams) sword. This may have been a custom option. I also own a NCO 1840 Spadroon by Robes. It is a horrible sword in every way. Had to be issued by an Armory. Both are antiques. I also own quite a few triangular Smallswords. Some as light as 10oz(284 grams) Points are all sharp still after 300 years. You can use a Smallsword or Spadroon against a bayonet. It's just you do not do a static block. You use the offhand to grab the bayonet then strike the infantryman. Which was a technique used in training i think. Would i choose a Smallsword at all? Sure. If it's against a Smallsword or dagger. Keep in mind many duels required both opponents to use the same type of sword. And the Smallsword came far later than the arming sword. Different time ,context and ecology. Carrying a Smallsword in civil life is just fine. As you'll most likely only encounter a dagger or Smallswords. Note: By Smallsword i am aware not all were triangular. I just think the triangular one is better overall. Especially for rigidity. Whats the worst sword? A sword that fails to do its purpose. A Smallsword that cannot penetrate. A Longsword that cannot cut. A Rapier guard that is too fragile. Too short of a dagger in the left hand . A spear that has inferior wood and breaks.

[@mrbaileys4371]

I really like the switching camera angles (and editing) in this video. I think it goes really well with this style of informative video. I may not have noticed it in other videos if this is something that you've been doing. It's so natural I almost missed it in this one! I think you could take this farther, but I'm not sure how yet. I know the limitations are basically space and time....... that sounds far grander than it was supposed to. But i know you'll continue improving! Keep on keepin on!

[@WritingFighter]

It gets too janky. For a flash of emphasis it's ok, but constantly changing angles for the sake of it is really annoying. Metatron used to do that and it drove me nuts, I'm glad he doesn't anymore or at least so much in the same way.

[@mrbaileys4371]

@WritingFighter always room to improve, but none the less like the choice.

[@joetheagent]

obviously the worst sword is one without a detachable pommel...

[@Tormentadeplomo]

Idea for next video: What's is a OK sword.

[@tidepoolclipper8657]

Short swords made after the fall of Western Rome were generally alright. Usually good enough for defense. Kodachi also isn't all that bad. There are also the very early Egyptian swords that look more like daggers.

[@thomasfplm]

What is the OKyest sword 😂

[@Sableagle]

You can't just cover Ok swords, though. You'd have to cover AB, AL, AK, AZ, AR, BC, CA, CO, CT, DE, FL, GA, HI, ID, IL, IN, IA, KS, KY, LA, ME, MB, MD, MA, MI, MN, MS, MO, MT, NE, NV, NB, NH, NL, NJ, NT, NM, NY, NS, NC, ND, NT, OH, OK, ON, OR, ...

[@bigolbearthejammydodger6527]

As a fellow Yorkshireman general mercer - I will take you your gods awful infantry sword and raise you my gods awful infantry boots that MELTED in the heat! nice to see things never change - the British crap quality army equipment thrown to the regular soldier or a Yorkshireman's ability to tell it how it is! kind regards sir - may you rest in peace, Lt tech specialist 'bear'. Its also worth noting that the good general was not complaining about his own equipment (which would have been superior) rather complaining on behalf of his men who had to suffer that sword. A true gentleman and an officer if you ask me!

[@WritingFighter]

*urumi whip sword* Thin, a flexible weapon that can come back and potentially hurt you, very thin, can't really block or parry, can't defend well as it can't even entangle a weapon, it curls in on itself, lightweight but very awkward to carry, you have to unwind it for use after retrieval from where you have it held, you can't thrust with it, tests on gel suggest usually superficial cuts unless you wrapped it around the neck or wrist and specifically slit deeply, and completely useless against any kind of armor, including cloth armor. Recommended use with a shield, but often you have to flail it around so wildly that you expose yourself in many ways. I think the one with multiple blades looking like a 9-tail whip is probably worse. (After watching) Yeah, give me that flint blade or a bronze khopesh ANY DAY over an urumi whip sword. Reading comments, give me a f3$%&ing STICK. I will take a sturdy and simple wooden dowel rod the length of a a short sword or a dagger over a whip sword. Hell, I think I'd rather just THROW RANDOM ROCKS or use a rock as an improvised bludgeon.

[@OctavioMovies]

Yeah but its cool

[@code066funkinbird3]

​@OctavioMovies but it's hurts

[@bellakaldera3305]

I occasionally see "swords" at Flea Markets that do cause me to declare That "if I ever must go blade to blade with another, I wish my enemy to have this blade"! (for then my victory will be assured!)

[@julietfischer5056]

Easy enough to sharpen a piece of metal, wrap one end in paracord, and give it a fancy name. It takes a bit more work to produce a sword-like object for hanging on the wall. You can find both types in catalogs.

[@mp5enthusiast]

New video idea: What's the most "🫤" sword?

[@asa-punkatsouthvinland7145]

I would like to add to honorable mentions the bearing sword and the execution sword. The bearing sword for usually being unusually large and heavy; essentially useless except to carry in parades. The execution sword for usually being too heavy for a fighting sword, generally lacking a sharp tip & essentially being created so nobles could feel good about themselves not being executed with axes.

[@nazarnovitsky9868]

Thanks for the new video ! 😊

[@ryarth23]

That one sword shaped stick, though, that you find... BEST sword!

[@TheGuzeinbuick]

Never ever ever change your outro song. It's so freaking good.

[@Rodclutcher]

Doing great with these videos Skall!!

[@Deltarious]

I legit have to start checking the UV index when I go outside, even if the day starts overcast, to make sure I don't burn when it gets closer to summer, fortunately we've gotten pretty good at predicting it now so I just prepare in advance. Even on a bone-chillingly cold day it's the UV index that determines burn time/severity, as I *also* found out the hard way in the snow, which 'helpfully' further increases the risk by bouncing the light back at you to hit you a second time

[@Riceball01]

The thing is, it doesn't matter if it's sunny or overcast, you can get burned either way. It's just that you're more aware of it when it's sunny out.

[@Seriously_Unserious]

I find slowly increasing doses of sunlight helps. You get some sweet, sweet vitamin D, and you give your skin a chance to build up it's summer pigment over time, and you're less likely to burn the rest of the summer once you've got your summer tan in. I don't mean laying in the sun to intestinally tan, but incidentally tanning as you go about your day, being careful not to overdo it to the point of burning. One funfact about sunblock is it blocks the rays that trigger vitamin D production and skin pigmentation, but not necessarily the ones that can cause cancer.

[@comradewindowsill4253]

@@Seriously_Unserious nah back that up with sources dude

[@Seriously_Unserious]

@@comradewindowsill4253 Look up any medical research on where the human body gets vitamin D from. Search engines exist. Use them.

[@Seriously_Unserious]

@@comradewindowsill4253 Besites, I can't link to sources, as YT doesn't allow ANY links in comments, it autonukes the comment as "spam" anyways, so me doing all your work for you and linking sources is not even possible.

[@dorkatarmsetcetera9468]

good video. honestly the answer of "every first draft sucks, also no whole category that we project backwards onto historical armaments can be an absolute trash-heap (see spadroon and dussack)." genuinely appreciate the support for spadroon models after the 1790s lol

[@TheLastMelon-zv6dh]

Skallagrim, your in depth analysis for all circumstances is why I really like your content.

[@aidangartner8786]

I love the historical context and perspective you present, historiography and stuff

[@LeanneLeroy-ou7ob]

Your content is refreshingly authentic, keeps me coming back for more!

[@ChrisHuppey]

Begone bot-wench

[@caracoldeleche]

Haven't seen the video yet, but I'm going with the urumi. An insult to swords and all that is good and beautiful. It's like one of those nightmares in wich you fight and your blows don't hurt.

[@chriwa6830]

Both entertaining and educational, as always! 👍

[@M.M.83-U]

A very substantial rational core skilfully wrapped in fun and jokes, like a cannolo of knowledge; great video.

[@arthurhenrique6852]

Ninja mall swords...

[@Seriously_Unserious]

It's actually Mall Ninja swords, but yeah, I get your point. Or in the case of Mall Ninja weapons, points galore! 🤣🤣

[@kenabbott8585]

I call those Kitannas.

[@iandegiovani4703]

just a note: Cloudy days can still burn. UVs can blast through

[@nitzeart]

I love the way you answer these types of questions. You really consider so much before giving an answer and it seems fun to consider!

[@kungfutuber]

0:33 I would have been fine with that ending but appreciate the deep dive 👍

[@Gibson7Clans]

The worst sword is one that brakes on you.

[@carlosdanger5466]

Are you driving the sword?

[@toddfarthing8760]

I had a cheap, sharp sword shear off at the handle and bounce back into my face while on vacation, I turned my head at the last second and received a severe laceration just above my right ear. We were camping and off to the hospital I went went for a bunch of staples.

[@aliffimran2073]

thanks for reminding me to change the brakes on my sword

[@lontvany]

should i have abs on my sword or what

[@blackreaper1288]

​@@carlosdanger5466game of thrones new edition, the ruler of all kingdoms shall drive the "iron toyota"

[@ub-4630]

Wall-hanger swords?

[@kitepoker-4569]

decorative pieces meant to look fancy or cool, but have no real use for combat

[@thehurricane6767]

Also known as "Mall Ninja swords"

[@laurencefraser]

The ones intended to be hung on the wall (hence 'wall hanger', 'one which hangs (on the wall)'.) as decoration rather than used as swords. Amusingly, in practice, this generally makes them More useful if the goal is to injur or kill someone, as they're often 'blunt sharp' or the like, where, while they don't have a proper edge, they're at least sharp enough to Look like they do, and usually have all their points, while swords actually used in sparing and such tend to have the points cut off and the edges hammered down and filed off to make absolutely sure they're too blunt to actually do meaningful damage to an armoured opponent (well, beyond the unavoidable consequences of striking them with a large metal bar). Of course, they also tend to be made of poor quality metal, among other issues, and thus will chip very easily on impact, or even break entirely.

[@JoshSwordNerd]

swords meant purely for decor, normally low quality metal, and rat-tang (a thin bit welded onto the blade) that would break if put into combat, either by chipping or just snapping. A joke I put on them is they are "One time use weapons" but it is inadvisable to actually use them as such. a machete is a better sword than a wall hanger, and most machetes don't qualify to be a sword/messer (German knife sword) - though some do, but they are very few (see certain Gladius machetes & shadiversity vids on his machete falchion - which is similar to a real falchion, but not 1-to-1)

[@dbKneecapped]

SLO. Sword-Like Objects

[@curtisbailey78]

Loved this video, Skal. Great concept, funny and honest. Kudos.

[@GinoLuccio]

Dude, whenever you say 'link in the description', i'm like YEAAA, which one of the thousand! But aye, awesome vid again, cool to learn a bit of history about these swords too. _takes hat off_

[@johnbd9765]

The worst sword is a cantaloupe

[@robinthrush9672]

A mall ninja sword that has spikes facing the hand, spikes along the blade, is thick like the Buster Sword, and collapses in on itself.

[@URMyNewTV]

Excalibur is worse. You can throw a mall ninja sword, you can't do that with a sword sticking in a giant rock.

[@robinthrush9672]

@@URMyNewTV The stone isn't part of the stone though. That's like judging the cutting power of a sword while it's in its sheath.

[@URMyNewTV]

@@robinthrush9672 You can judge it like that, if the sheath is made out of metal and welded to the blade. Yes, the stone is part of it unless it accepts you as the rightful king of England. The chance of that happening is much lower than a thrown wallhanger hitting an eye. Excalibur is the worst.

[@WritingFighter]

​@@URMyNewTV *urumi whip sword* is worse than most mall ninja things and possibly Excalibur. Plus, the urumi was built to be an actual, functional weapon at that. A thin, flimsy, a flexible weapon that can come back and potentially hurt you, very thin, can't really block or parry, can't defend well as it can't even entangle a weapon, it curls in on itself, lightweight but very awkward to carry, you have to unwind it for use after retrieval from where you have it held, you can't thrust with it, tests on gel suggest usually superficial cuts unless you wrapped it around the neck or wrist and specifically slit deeply, and completely useless against any kind of armor, including cloth armor. Recommended use with a shield, but often you have to flail it around so wildly that you expose yourself in many ways. I think the one with multiple blades looking like a 9-tail whip is probably worse. Definitely can't throw it. The whip sword curls in on itself at rest. urumi < bronze sword urumi < sturdy stick the length of your forearm urumi < nunchuckau Hell, I think random rocks lying around to throw and use as a bludgeon is better.

[@URMyNewTV]

@@WritingFighter Hm, if you master the urumi and you have two, you could fight off a horde of rabid raccoons. High efford, low gain, minimal usefulness. The urumi is most useful as a Sri Sanka tourist catcher, but Excalibur would draw more tourists 100 %. You win. 😄

[@Swordsage]

08:39 Oh man... that does hurt to look at.

[@NickCombs]

0:33 Perfect video 10/10 have a wonderful day!

[@troperhghar9898]

9 times out of 10 the worst sword is the one you can't use or the one that goes against your natural movements, so for me forward curved blades like the greek kopis feel so wrong in my hand that i couldn't use it even if i wanted too

[@WritingFighter]

The Urumi whip sword is WAAAAY worse. The Kopis isn't bad, it doesn't feel as poor as you might think. The whip sword though... Thin, a flexible weapon that can come back and potentially hurt you, very thin, can't really block or parry, can't defend well as it can't even entangle a weapon, it curls in on itself, lightweight but very awkward to carry, you have to unwind it for use after retrieval from where you have it held, you can't thrust with it, tests on gel suggest usually superficial cuts unless you wrapped it around the neck or wrist and specifically slit deeply, and completely useless against any kind of armor, including cloth armor. Recommended use with a shield, but often you have to flail it around so wildly that you expose yourself in many ways. I think the one with multiple blades looking like a 9-tail whip is probably worse. You can't even throw it; it curls in on itself at rest. I'd rather have any bronze or flint sword... I'd rather have a lot of wall hangers, I'm pretty sure I would pick up random rocks to throw or use as a bludgeon.

[@rabies5179]

Probably a broken one

[@Sableagle]

I wonder how well a longsword broken off mid-blade and filed down to give it a new pointy tip would work for a Hobbit.

[@Skallagrim]

I'd argue a broken one is better than a sword that breaks on the first hit (or worse, parry). If it's already broken at least you know where you're at.

[@Confused_surprise]

@@Sableagle That's a good question actually. I'd say if you do this with a katana, you can have a hobbit weilding the shorter version of a nagamaki. It works well with a katana because it's a saber, with the point of balance being in the blade. A longsword however is balanced near the guard, so it might be quite difficult to use effectively if the blade is broken. Unless if you unscrew the pommel to throw at your enemy of course.

[@jcalvert6666]

Just a thought here, you might consider doing a video on victorianera wallhangers... it seems like interesting subject.

[@Roland3ld]

Loved that cold open with the false ending. It made me laugh out loud. Skallagrim, you are hilarious.

[@TheWizardGandy]

Skallagrim gets a mild sunburn giving his cheeks a healthy looking glow: "The attack on my life has left me scarred and deformed"

[@williamhall3043]

Bet it’s a katana

[@MasakanSolaris]

I'll be honest the more I think about it's design and what it's suppose to do the more it upsets me. The katana feels like the most indecisive sword ever made it doesn't know what it wants to be.

[@ATGaming-bq3vq]

​@@MasakanSolaris I just hate weebs...

[@williamhall3043]

@@MasakanSolaristhe best cut and thrusters ever obviously 🙄 😂

[@Goiaba308]

@@MasakanSolaris It wants to be a sword made whit poor materials

[@atom8248]

@@Goiaba308 There is limited scientific evidence and historic evidence for Japanese swords being poorer quality than any other culture's sword. There is, on the other hand, good evidence for them actually being very good, both through modern scientific studies of the material and historical evidence.

[@Ortorin]

Wow, this is a question I've never actually thought about! Nice!

[@peteredwards2318]

The worst sword ... If we ignore wall hangers, and sword like objects, AND ignore things made to be swords but constructed in such a fashion as to make them more of a threat to the wielder than to their target, I feel that even with this refinement of intent, there is no one, specific answer to the question of which sword is worst or best. Instead, we must consider the wielder's needs. There is little reason to place a beautifully crafted two handed tank of a sword, in the hands of a slim, short wielder, and expect them to think of it fondly, while it drags them off balance and makes them fall about with its enormity. Nor should we conclude that putting a light and nimble, delicate blade in the shovel-like paws of a 7 foot tall, 300 plus lbs monster of a wielder, will result in them having a positive experience. The weapon in general, has to be selected to match the wielders attributes of strength, endurance, size, weight, and even temperament. There are going to be those who simply lack the mentality required to engage in a chess match of a sword fight, of a sort favouring more agile equipment, and these people would be more effective with something designed for a more pigheaded approach to combat, a broader blade, focused more toward the cut, something designed to cleave into a thick press of enemy, relentlessly slashing and cutting rather than something appropriate for more precise, dedicated single combat in a duelling situation. There will be those who lack the berserk fury required for that sort of fighting, who instead prefer the ballet of the duel, and would be suited to a more agility and precision focused weapon, a thrusting specialist blade. I wonder how many accounts of "bad" swords from military history, take this into any account? Do those who malign the spadroon take into account that they probably weren't physically suited to it? Did they consider that the reason they might have found it unfavourable, is because it didn't suit them personally, rather than just being "bad"? Did they consider that a person constructed differently than them, with slimmer hands, but a longer reach might have found it an excellent accompaniment to their battlefield experience? I think the issues raised about SOME swords, particularly in the ages where standardisation forced a one size fits all approach on those equipped with a given blade, are issues with standardisation, not the actual equipment itself. If your body needs a longsword, no rapier will ever feel right in your hand. If your body needs a spadroon, a polearm will never do. Melee combat is not something that standardisation should EVER have been permitted to encroach upon. It works for guns, but melee combat is DEEPLY personal. You can't and shouldn't train a body made like a tank, to carry and use a sword that feels like a toothpick, nor should anyone have ever expected a body slight and small to carry an arming sword and have success. The needs of militaries to be able to operate logitistcally, should never have been permitted to overshadow the importance of equipping every warrior in their cohort, with weapons that suit their bodies and their mentality. That is what leads to a lot of the hate some swords get, I think.

[@Outlier777]

A katana, to be honest. A two handed - single edged - super short sword, with essentially no hand protection made with inferior steel.

[@johnapple6646]

Wrong

[@purplefuzzymonster17]

I know this is click bait, but... The katana is "short" because it has to be so that it can be drawn directly into a cut. Japanese fashion of its period dictated how the katana was worn, and that meant it had to be "short." The original disk guards were quite large. It's when then were used less for combat and more for wear that the tsuba shrank. Modern guards are laughably small in comparison. Lastly, they were better than the uchigatana that inspired them. *Those* things were deliberately cheap because they were originally made for poor warriors who would rather spend their money on armor and a spear. It was when the daimyo saw one and thought, "this are cool; I'd rather wear this as my sidearm," that the improvements creating the katana occurred.

[@atom8248]

Wrong on every front. Scientific literature and historical writing both completely disagree. Studies of the composition of Japanese blades have shown that they have high purity. Japanese swords were highly regarded historically, by Europeans and especially in China amd Korea. It's also worth noting that European, Chinese and Japanese blades used very similar methods of making and similar steel into the 17th century. Katana are short and two handed? Katana can be used in one or two hands. Some were made as one-handed swords, paintings of battle frequently show them used in one hand and there are techinques to use them in one hand. Katana varied a lot actually, some are short and suitable for one-handed use at about 60cm and some could be longsword sized. As a sidearm you might prefer something shorter and more handy or something that holds it's ground better against other weapons. Before the Edo period a katana with a 90cm blade was pretty common. No hand protection, nonsensical point. Tsuba are adequate and large tsuba are arguably compareable to crossguards. Especially if you actually hold it correctly, with the main hand some distance from the tsuba to have more of a cone of protection.

[@code066funkinbird3]

Nope

[@LuxisAlukard]

The worst sword is that in you abdomen!

[@joet.s.6283]

Fun video, Skall! Interesting angle on an age old debate

[@_DarkEmperor]

First 14 seconds is a Scandinavian vampire story, good start.

[@ZerusantAsh]

Skall's amount of restrain to not say "well katanas of course" was admirable

[@iansquires3269]

Skall's videos always make my lunch break better. Keep it up man!

[@koenkooiman1490]

Love your humor😂 almost got me with the first 'ending' 😂

[@gmtyph00n20]

I love your work Skall. Keep on keeping on brother.

[@anthonyrector8183]

I really like the editing in this video. Skall felt much more 3 dimensional instead of just talking body in front of display.

[@LICENFIREFEAR]

Skallgrim ! favorite youtube channel about swords and weapons

[@whakadabellgate5699]

I love how you work throu your topics and find some good ideas

[@larquefausse3623]

6:54 "Satirical?" I thought that there were a lot of valid points made in that video. Did Verhoeven ghost direct that one?

[@IcerFreakyNana]

You mentioned in a previous video that sometimes you feel stumped for ideas. It was very interesting to me to see your analysis of swords in this video. I agree with you that of course defining a sword as the worst one depends mainly on your goal with such sword. However, when you described the bronze sword's faults, I wanted to hear more about specific aspects of sword: What happens when a pommel is too big? How does it lock your wrist? What about its shape? What are the benefits of having no guard on a sword? You've already mentioned in previous videos certain traits that help swords cut or thrust better, but what happens when they go overboard, like a sword that is too curved, too broad or too long? Is it just a matter of weight or is there more to it? What about the material it's made of? Should people just look for sturdier material, like the difference between bronze and steel? The best sword should be made of carbon fiberglass, diamond or something like that? Or does a hard material reaches a point where it gets too brittle?

[@adelmolla4216]

Can we just take a moment to appreciate how good your beard looks in this video?

[@macacofrito]

Great content, as always. I love this channel

[@KermodeBear]

You are a gift to the world, Skallagrim, hope that sunburn gets better soon!

[@Balgore8]

Those are great answers, and great reasoning!

[@snakeoveer1046]

The "talhoffer" buckler in the background looks pretty cool. Would love to hear your thoughts about it

[@ELVendedor5000]

The Spanish Modelo 1895 Saber! Just what were they thinking?! 🤦

[@princeofdyved9837]

Thanks for the video! Now to watch the video on avoiding buying the worst swords.

[@ezrafaulk3076]

You mentioned that Scandinavia lagged a bit *behind* the rest of Europe & the Middle East, still being in the late Stone Age when the latter two were in the Bronze Age; I think a video talking about *why* that might've been the case would be a *great* video, because I'm genuinely curious about that.

[@quarkraven]

I love this video!!! humor, history, facts, context, points made with nuance, points made bluntly... it has it all! you da man skall

[@flareinc7413]

Good points as always ^^ That is a very cool shirt. Need one :P

[@jimmybears]

love the videos man

[@napalmholocaust9093]

Tin and copper ingots went together. That one ship wreck had enough to equip like 300 in full gear. It wasn't mixed yet. 12% tin when all melted together.

[@TeaBurn]

I feel ya...I wish spring wasn't like 2 weeks out of the whole year before scorching death rays.

[@LuxisAlukard]

Highly entertaining and philosophical approach :)

[@Observer31]

Skall , if you goal was to make me jump with the sword at 8:50, mission accomplished! :D :D

[@mx.notyourbusiness8693]

I'm only 40 seconds into the video and just wanted to say that i really like your sarcastic humor, often makes me chuckle 😆

[@user-wj6dl6dt2r]

This has become my confort channel for the last two months

[@eiskalteshandchen9036]

Well, with thinking of the context - what about the last swords used or better said, carried into battles? Like Going to a artillery fight with a sword

[@josephcouture2838]

Another great video 👍👍