WHAT'S WORST, "PHYSICALLY CHEATING" OR "EMOTIONALLY CHEATING"?!?!

EP 94: In this episode we open up by talking about our favorite childhood experiences and if the boys could ever DATE a "WOMAN OF THE NIGHT" and vise versa for the girlies. We then go on to talk about if people SHOULD be putting their job BEFORE their relationship and which realistically should come 1st over the other. We also talk about why it seems like people nowadays can't commit to just one person and why our views on love seem so much more complicated than what it used to be in the past. We wrap up the podcast by talking about the benefits and negatives of being in a healthy relationship and if we would rather be PHYSICALLY or EMOTIONALLY CHEATED ON!!! HOPE YA'LL ENJOY!!!! :D
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Nick Grajeda
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[@gennyg5072]

Y’all should make Maru and Devin host a podcast together. I just know it’d be funny as hell.

[@hwfefbqeflqp]

facts

[@letalia2058]

No fr

[@malakkhanafer4104]

This podcast is the only thing I look forward to in my week.

[@lonlygurl89]

Same here

[@lizbethperez3633]

Facts!

[@Mitchh1316]

LEGITTTT

[@EleashaD]

Same

[@aaliyahtaha6762]

same same

[@dayjablake7]

to feed off what Maru was saying as far as Masculine and Feminine energy… Masculine Energy is action driven, external efforts to reach achievements, rooted in logic and reason, the masculine energy is the brain half of a relationship. where feminine energy is like maru said “just being”, it’s very internalized effort, attracting and allowing, it’s the heart half of the relationship. and any gender can fall into one or both of those energies. I think Maru was saying that the relationship Cynthia is in now has helped her transition from her divine masculine era into her divine feminine era, or “her soft girl era” she’s gone from having this intimidating wall up to “just being”.

[@dayjablake7]

also i think sage was confusing the whole “chasing topic with putting in effort. i think he thought the girls were saying only the guy should put effort into the relationship. but in reality (and in reference to my previous comment) it’s just the kind of effort that’s put forward. the masculine energy makes physical efforts like setting dates, doing nice things, defending and protecting. where the feminine energy expresses in internal efforts such as creating a safe space for communication, allowing and encouraging vulnerability, creating trust. and these aren’t roles assigned once you’re in a relationship. everyone already naturally identifies with one of these energies, and many will transition between the two fluidly throughout their lives. so men can be the devine feminine and women can be the divine masculine. and some people use one of either of the energies as a defense mechanism sometimes. when these energies come together ima balanced way it gives room for a healthy relationship.

[@trouvaille1558]

thank you!!

[@vsriracha]

You worded this perfectly

[@Carla-bk3zu]

This is very well said

[@MAYCEMAYCE]

Loved this!

[@viviankestler8437]

Nick opening up in the intro about seasonal, mental health, and just struggling a little with school really brought a smile to my face just to know its not just me .

[@anaojeda1902]

fr im the same rn

[@alyssakaytlin758]

we needed christine for the feminine vs masculine discussion lmao

[@jasmvnee__]

ik she would have such good things to say !

[@samanthaalarcon4305]

I was thinking the same thing, I feel like she’s the most knowledgeable and open minded about relationships and experimenting. And also about mental health

[@dianamlv]

That's what I was thinking

[@katlynpriego3307]

Sage is thinking about toxic masculinity maur is talking about a masculine energy (protective, responsible, a sage space) and the feminine energy that is brought out when a girl is in a good relationship it’s (soft, trusting, light hearted, comfortable, and confident) her boyfriend has that safe masculine energy that allows her to be safe trusting feminine

[@keiseanpaints_gd8669]

But how protective and responsible a masculine or feminine trait aren't those just good traits to have in general and shouldn't a good relationship require both to have those traits?

[@Salma-sb6bo]

​@@keiseanpaints_gd8669 i feel like its more of what a girl yearns in a boyfriend rather than a literal "masculine" energy, everyone should be responsible in a relationship. protectiviness is also commonly associated with men due to natural instinct but is a trait that everyone should acquire.

[@toobad9295]

@@keiseanpaints_gd8669 exactly, labeling traits that everyone should have as 'masculine' or 'feminine' makes no sense, just say they're a good person or that they're happy instead of bs (respectfully) like "my feminine/masculine energy is coming out"

[@caprisunyummy]

Seeing cynthia happy makes me so happy bc I remember the first ever pod i ever saw i blatantly remember cynthia shitting her ex that cheated on her so hard i was like holy shit and now seeing how happy she is just makes me all warm inside like it just makes me smile

[@isarose00]

nick is so right about bynthia having a dark aura, that man is treating her so good she’s is def more vibrant & always giggly now!! love to see it 🫶🏼

[@dannielavizcarra44420]

When maru says mmm hmmm and Cynthia starts dying 💀

[@SKCLightningRider98]

time stamp?

[@thatonegirl3782]

@@SKCLightningRider98 21:20

[@jjjiiddppeew1810]

When she said “I feel like it would feel so good in my mouth” and sage was like 🙃

[@Rickygrines]

@@jjjiiddppeew1810 down bad

[@RizzAdobo]

Question for the next pod: is it a good idea dating within the friend group? is it worth risking the cohesion of the friend group?

[@isarose00]

!!!!

[@ElaMarieCarMel]

omg yes please!!

[@jessicatreat4283]

great question, want them to discuss!

[@Person-oe7li]

It’s a great question but i feel like they’d struggle to answer because it hasn’t happened in their friend group *that i am aware of*

[@loljk4503]

!!!

[@gabymur19]

maru: I think I've figured out the key to life! devin: 😮 what is it maru: .... I lost it 😩

[@kellywang3877]

i remember nick not knowing the difference between worst and worse and the title of this video proves it😭

[@babagodel6363]

Nah I'm 💀. Now I see it

[@shiluugei23]

LMFAOOOOOO

[@lunarai5397]

Favorite part was definitely the talk about chasing, interesting convo to bring up VOTE WEALTHY RESIDENTS

[@nicolejuliet02]

Yess WEALTHY RESIDENTS

[@asyasweets7433]

WEALTHY RESIDENTS

[@shouathao3447]

Nick, I’m so proud of you. You’re understanding the yin and yang = masculinity and femininity in a spiritual meaning!!! Good job! Love the girls trying their best to explain it even though they were struggling a little! ❤️

[@Hailey-ew9hu]

Everyone has both feminine and masculine energy it is needed to build a strong relationship in both partners. When it comes to bringing someone’s feminine energy in a relationship is when the other partner has a healthy understanding of their masculinity. These ideas don’t have to be just stereotypical but a lot of them come from equal parts in a relationship. hope this makes sense 💀

[@isabelalmaraz4471]

Facts. I think that’s wat sage was trying to say

[@deandrasisneros1684]

As someone who has been cheated on physically and emotionally, emotionally is way worse in my experience. Physically just shows they are a shitty person, where the emotional made me feel like there was something wrong with me and made me question our entire relationship.

[@araceligarcia2569]

Perfectly put

[@melissacruz5521]

The best thing about Mondays are these vidos🥰 btw feminine energy is nurturing, soft, with strong boundaries, and trusting of her intuition. Masculine energy is present, logical, and focused with a deep desire to protect and build. Hope it makes sense! Love y’all♥️

[@keiseanpaints_gd8669]

But how are those masculine and feminine traits on those just both could traits to overall have like for example isn't logical a trait everyone should have?

[@kirbycola7]

@@keiseanpaints_gd8669 what's your definition of healthy masculinity and femininity?

[@kyrah6427]

y’all make me look forward to mondays 😭

[@Dezi.cakesss]

I like suburb stalkers and imagine the merch it look look sooo good and I love the way nick ended the podcast 😭 ToGeThEr 🤝

[@aaiirssjoy]

They need to make ToGeThEr T-shirts. That’d be lit! Hahaha

[@Person-oe7li]

Devin being obsessed with just dance 3 makes so much sense, also same though lmao

[@f4ithyy]

college makes me hate life, but I thank god that you guys post at the beginning of the week to push me through each college week

[@luhaze]

nick is slowly starting to become devin & sage💀

[@gracethompson11]

Off of what Maru said, masculine energy (and this can exist in men and women as can feminine energy) is taking care of the physical side of the relationship, meaning creating a space where the feminine can feel protected, safe, cared for and valued. Doing physical tasks for the fem like carrying and fixing things. The masculine is like body of the relationship, leading the way and protecting the mind of the relationship which is the feminine. The feminine is spiritual energy. They heal and nurture the masculine and give them a space to feel their emotions and learn how to empathize and grow emotionally and spiritually. They support and comfort the masculine. Only a healed masculine (which is hard to find in men due to incel Andrew tate misogyny type shit) can produce a space in which to allow a feminine to blossom into their full potential for healing. Cynthia is “more girly” now bc she has a man with whom she feels safe to let her walls down with and exist in a authentic state. When feminines have been hurt by past relationships sometimes they exhibit masculine traits to protect themselves bc they have no masculine to protect them.

[@gracethompson11]

Y’all should listen to maru more, she’s always right on track just can’t explain it well

[@mojojojoooo]

They tend to brush off what she says or combat her statements more because she’s not the best at explaining her point (I’m like that too). Then Christine would say she the same thing a few seconds later with more conviction in her voice and they won’t question it.

[@americanasian3156]

Sage and Devin host 🤩 That’s always a good sign

[@xdinarymichelle]

1:20:42 i don’t think anybody understood sage 😭 i think he means he doesn’t really believe much in the masc/fem standard roles. he believes it should be even. like girls should b able to chase guys just as guys can equally. both should be caring, make u feel safe etc. i agree bc i don’t really like assigning certain qualities to just one gender. if the relationship works, there will be balance between two ppl no matter who’s masc/fem.

[@elo8796]

Yes ur right I think like sage because I’m an Aries also

[@prestonstanley6562]

That’s exactly what he was saying. They were basically putting everyone into a box of being one thing and that’s unrealistic everyone has these traits they aren’t “masculine or feminine”. It’s why I don’t really believe in gender roles

[@thorisor2428]

@@elo8796 lol....because you are an Aries

[@dianael.]

@@thorisor2428 😭😭😭 I’m literally done with people who use these zodiac signs

[@ctaps2455]

YESS i was looking for a comment that pointed it out like sage understands what they're trying to say but like he just doesn't see the need to categorize traits that can be found in anyone of any gender. I personally think it's pointless to focus on bringing out your "masc/fem" side like you're a human being you gonna do those things regardless.

[@briceidacorona8994]

This podcast helps me see what I want in a future relationships and everything ❤️❤️

[@AubreyKadaubrey]

Bynthia! If you genuinely don’t want to go to the club, then don’t! But please don’t be going because your man says you “shouldn’t!” A mature, grown man will trust you and your friends because he loves you and wants you to live a fulfilled, happy youth. My boyfriend is the most supportive man and I trust him at the club with his friends, and he trusts me at the club with mine. Love you guys!

[@mjebbu]

When Maru said “pero” and then continued in English was so funny I had to replay that 🤣🤣

[@Poppymoua1997]

One thing about the feminine and masculine energies: it exists in all genders. Keeping a balance in the relationship - when the feminine energy allows one to be the masculine, and vice versa. Introspective of Cynthia's relationship: her bf's masculine energy allows her to accept her feminine energy instead of rejecting it bc his masculine energy allows her to exist in the feminine energy.

[@toobad9295]

"her bf's masculine energy allows her to accept her feminine energy instead of rejecting it bc his masculine energy allows her to exist in the feminine energy" OR just say her bf is a good person which is why cynthia is happy period why do y'all feel the need to label everything bruhh (respectfully)

[@MadMax-ui3tw]

Cynthia switched up so quick about going to the club while having a partner who doesn’t like it, she was defending going out with her homegirls for her life just a couple podcasts ago 💀💀

[@lmc2410]

sounds like her man is being controlling or manipulative

[@chrisperez4319]

@@lmc2410 huh?

[@lmc2410]

@@chrisperez4319 she’s 21. if he’s making her feel guilty for going out with her girls, that’s a huge red flag. especially if she felt so strongly about it, she hasn’t been dating him long

[@yocelinbarraza1942]

@@dassandavis5507 every once in a while she should u can’t just be not go out cause your in a relationship

[@cnmngrl]

even if she felt strongly about it in the last podcast, she can change her mind. it’s not that crazy

[@macyferguson7322]

I literally watch every single podcast as soon as it comes out. ILYALL SM.

[@theasianjason]

the next podcast uploads on halloween, love that

[@wondieanded9171]

waittttt yesssss i love thqt

[@Arolynn]

Love my lil therapy monday sessions with y’all

[@nylsh693]

Stressing for midterms but watching y’all is one of my stress relievers

[@danyellewhite8635]

I always say that I would rather have someone emotionally cheat on me than physically and people act as if that doesn’t make sense, so when Nick explains why he prefers someone to emotionally cheat on him, PERFECTLY, I got so happy.

[@cynthiatran5403]

i need you guys to talk about attachment styles!! it would be so interesting - nick def seems like he’s the avoidant type

[@RangerRicky]

Bro I was so sad earlier but as soon as I watch some podcasts I'm madd good. Thank yall ssooo much. Im sending So much love to yall

[@kylie5014]

this podcast is the only reason I’m living, love my therapy ❤

[@aryapalla2491]

bro what, do u need help

[@sakuraapparel4898]

59:47 I understand Nicks perspective and being yelled at just shuts those type of people down. Approaching with a calm, respectful tone is easier to communicate to that type! ❤love y’all 🎃

[@edensturdivant3376]

makes my day better when y’all post

[@theanimekid7128]

The only podcasts that doesn't make me feel alone :)

[@anahisanchez1795]

Bro can we talk about how sage has such a contagious smile!!! Like he smile and I smile 😂🫶🏼

[@NadiaVenice]

I be forgetting it’s already Monday and time for a new episode, it’s always perfect timing

[@jadengalloway6003]

sometimes i wish cynthia would stop interrupting them (in this case the guys) and actually allow them to finish answering w their opinion* instead of cutting them of and arguing w them like when nick was trying to say his preference in terms of cheating

[@crayzie53]

If you guys ever need a break, definitely take one. We’ll be here when y’all get back 🫡

[@karinabarrera6041]

The fact that I was talking about this with someone a few days ago blows my mind. But Mondays are the best bc of y’all! 🎊

[@landynroyal3632]

I look forward to Mondays because of this podcast

[@jackie7875]

kinda down for Suburb Stalkers. Kinda has a ring to it 😂.

[@brookevang654]

“when do you know a relationship isn’t worth the sacrifice anymore” for me, i’ve always thought that i know when i ask myself would i be willing to deal with this for the rest of my life and if it was a no then i don’t think i would stay.

[@victoriaskerrett8856]

I started asking myself, would I want my best friend to deal with this and it helped me leave situations at a time where I didn’t value myself enough.

[@noshabaquazi2013]

love you guys, wishing you all the best always:) and thank you for today's video!!!

[@user-lo6ny1wf7b]

Nick is talking about people who have only experienced toxic relationships and how they tend to find healthy relationships boring bc they are not constantly fighting or having anxiety, walking on eggshells, being hypervigilant etc. It feels boring to them because they’re not in the hyperactive state anymore. The comfort and safety is so different and calming thar it can feel boring

[@shannonamaris]

i’m never tm this early,, i love y’all’s podcast so much🫶🏽

[@lydiaramirez9783]

this podcast is my therapy 🙏🏽

[@gabicortez8267]

Obligation to do what you love for money is what kills your passion for the craft, take breaks and deliver when yall are ready! Thats why we love suburb talks ❤

[@alexxuss1066]

This is probably one of my favorite podcast eps, the topics and questions were so interesting and I love the depth. Suburb Stalkers is better btw

[@jordanglover247]

Love you guys

[@roxyromero2313]

I love you guys so much, I relate to everything you'll talk about. You guys have help me a lot, I appreciate y'all so much❤❤

[@Rizorx8]

We understand don't worry if anyone has to take a break stay safe yall

[@Jocevisoso]

Wow devin !!! That’s good !!! Your advice was soooo good

[@deni9226]

55:00 those are words with meaning and power, love how y’all talk about this!! cause most people now wanna just break up to solve the problem because they’re fighting/arguing a lot, when it shouldn’t be that way, y’all have to fight for the relationship and communicate.!

[@s18531]

Just casually hinting that Nick isn’t single 👀👀

[@daniellacarozza3408]

best podcast! ily short kings 🧌👹❤️🤌🏻

[@brooklyndaw3709]

absolutely love your podcasts 🫶🏼

[@melissa851]

this is the only reason why i look forward to mondays

[@alaynaduckworth746]

Therapy sesh of the week let’s gooooo

[@shantalherrejon4060]

This is the only thing keeping me alive 💀

[@jennymartinez2541]

Only thing I look forward to every week 🤭

[@tucheboy4681]

Suburb stalkers is a banger would love to see some merch based on that ❤

[@sarahhh4447]

i love how maru is always making people feel heard aweee :(

[@suheily615]

these are literally my favorite people ever !!!

[@marleyismydog2175]

This podcast just made my day 🫶🏽

[@ulla2711]

DUDE I'M ABOUT TO WATCH I'M SO HYPEEEEE

[@PrevertedMonk]

This is the best podcast line up

[@karlaherrera2119]

The reason I like Monday!!

[@gadah1572]

i loveeddd these kind of questions 🧡🧡

[@pixieburger]

this episode is really hitting home! I really went 2months without watching yall so I could binge watch all later. I never thought I would be going through some of the shit mentioned here. I was emotionally cheated on in the beginning of 2022 and by the end, I was told that my best friend of fucking 8 years was with him. she basically cheated on me cause what the fuck kind of friend does that! I never saw it coming from her and that last part of “them knowing that it would hurt me and still doing it” really hit different for me 😶

[@edgarrodriguez6251]

You guys should have your next pod about modern day double standards

[@dassandavis5507]

Facts

[@repitore9041]

Yo I just started watching a few weeks ago and I show all my friends your guys videos. I’m also the same age as y’all!! I love this channel!!

[@mistaleala1866]

I know everyone was waiting patiently because you said the wrong time💀

[@miaulysee9831]

you guys gotta make a podcast on ur middle/highschool love or social life😭 i need nicks origin story!!

[@azuraselenite]

I agree with Sage. It's dumb to push gender roles like only men chase and only women receive. Also everyone has both feminine and masculine energy. I wish Christine was on this episode I feel like she would've been more educated on this topic cause what was said here is not what actual masculinity and femininity is.

[@JoseErazzo]

thank you!! it sounded like maru was setting up gender roles and making it sound like a relationship will depend ONLY on the man

[@tanishalegardy3737]

I’m watching and got to the part about masculine and feminine energy and hopefully this can help. So BOTH men and women have masculine and feminine energy. It’s the sun and moon, yin and Yang etc. cause no man is just masculine no women is just feminine we each have both. And what I think maru was trying to say is masculine energy is the sun like your on your boss type shit, you work hard, you create safety and security for yourself and your family. Women can also be that and be in their boss women shit getting shit done etc. feminine energy or as you may have seen “soft feminine or divine feminine” ( there’s also divine masculine) is when yes she’s soft or lets her guard down and is the nurturing side, caring side, emotional side of us. And it’s a dance of the yin and Yang that’s why the symbol is entangled in one another cause when a man gives off just the right amount of masculine energy is needed situations a womens feminine side can pop out b/c she knows her man has it locked down and secured. And a man can have is feminine energy pop out towards like his kids or his mom or showing empathy to world crisis situations in needed situations. And vice versa. But this is why sometimes girls don’t go for the “nice guy” cause they display TOO much feminine energy so her masculine energy has to pop out more and that’s not what we want to be when we are with our man. Hopefully that clears it up more

[@katelyntrei4736]

Exactly. This is what the tik tok I saw was saying haha. If a man has more feminine energy than me then I display my masculine side, but if he has more masculine energy than me, I let my feminine side come out a lot more. We all have different levels of masculine and feminine energy in us.

[@tanishalegardy3737]

@@katelyntrei4736 yesss yes yes yes

[@frankieee4]

I’m like Nick, I’m not confrontational and it draws me back in friendships even. You just shut yourself out instead of explaining what is bothering you and it just doesn’t get better because no one knows how that certain thing made u feel so it keeps happening. Don’t know if that makes sense :)

[@Isabella-mr3cm]

the only thing that makes me happy for mondays

[@gabrielalarios61]

Fav part of my day

[@tiffanyquach383]

I love that I can see them getting more sloshed throughout the duration of the podcast LOL

[@carrielynnyoungthunder1694]

Been waiting all day

[@-_-._.-_-1]

This video made my entire day better

[@TheSuperkawaii15]

I think what Maru is trying to say is that when men are in their divine masculine ( protective, loyal, confident, reassuring, etc) opposite of toxic masculine, it gives women ease and that allows them to be in their divine feminine (nurturing, caring, loving, calm, gentle), she feels safe and secure in the relationship! where it can flow. The women doesn’t feel insecure or like she’s begging for the bare minimum, constantly worrying about what her man is doing! Idk if that makes sense but yaaa 😈

[@andreaceiramillares7365]

we love our bynthia's inlove era!!!

[@lethallwulf]

cynthia being an english major and ALWAYS making fun of yall is my favorite thing fr😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹

[@kaitlynleannjackson6596]

I believe that you know when you aren’t as invested in the relationship when you contemplate if the person you are currently with isn’t growing. What I mean by that is thinking about where you want to be and if you can accept them as who they are, who they are currently being their final growth. If you can live with who they are being who they are permanently, then I think the pros end up outweighing the cons. This brings into perspective what your future will entail and determining if it is something you can live with. Once a decision has been made, it determines how you perceive/treat the relationship

[@eseosab5360]

y’all should bring back car discussions !!

[@gerovasquez4273]

MARU AND SAGE- Host CYNTHIA AND NICK-Host DEVIN AND CHRISTINE-Host

[@shailasingh7887]

Yes.

[@adreyannabutler6577]

I like the integrity shown in this podcast!

[@katieurena]

I remembered today was Monday and was patiently waiting for the upload, literally the best way to start off the week.

[@johanaargueta3873]

I love Nick's laugh, it's so funny!!! Y'all make me laugh all the time!! Keep it uppppp, don't stop, and best of luck with everything you guys are going through. ❤

[@damaniharris9551]

What Maru was saying about her saying she’ll never chase a man , I feel like in a general sense that is learned because since someone has never got the same in return they like subconsciously just stop… much love to you maru ❤️

[@chelseadinh9367]

why pay for therapy when this podcast exists

[@aliciacabrerasoto1154]

Sage you deserve such an amazing girl. I can't wait for that day to come to you. You're such sweetheart