What To Do When Life Falls Apart with Kris Carr - Terri Cole

Best-selling author Kris Carr is one of my nearest and dearest. We go way back to my talent agent days (I represented her).
Kris's newest book, I'm Not A Mourning Person: Braving Loss, Grief, and the Big Messy Emotions That Happen When Life Falls Apart, is a beautiful read. I could not put it down, and I lived a lot of this book with Kris as it was happening.
If you are experiencing grief of any kind, whether due to the loss of a loved one, the loss of your former self, or the loss of a job, I think you'll enjoy this heartfelt conversation.
Time stamps
0:00 - Quote from Kris
0:38 - Intro from Terri
3:55 - Running from grief
6:20 - Breaking down at CVS
9:00 - The grief train
11:47 - Mourning a cancer diagnosis
14:10 - Protecting yourself as a giver
17:50 - Kris setting a boundary for her dad
22:38 - Kris's boundary with condolence cards
25:00 - Talking to her father about death
28:50 - The both/and of feelings
If You Enjoyed This, Watch These Videos
• How to Navigate Grief ... - How to Navigate Grief + Growth to Heal
• Going No Contact, Navi... - Going No Contact, Navigating Grief and Codependency Recovery
• Boundary Scripts + Str... - Boundary Scripts + Strategies for Grieving
• Change Your Life With ... - Change Your Life with Dr. Sara Kuburic (Millennial Therapist)
About Kris Carr
Kris Carr has been called a “force of nature” by O Magazine and was named a “new role model” by The New York Times. Kris is also a member of Oprah’s SuperSoul 100, recognizing the most influential thought-leaders today.
Kris is an expert who lectures at hospitals, conferences and corporations. Media appearances include: Glamour, Prevention, Scientific American, Good Morning America, Today Show, CBS Evening News, The Wall Street Journal, Forbes, Success, Super Soul Sunday, OWN and The Oprah Winfrey Show.
She is the subject and director of the documentary Crazy Sexy Cancer, which premiered at the SXSW Film Festival and aired on TLC and The Oprah Winfrey Network. As an irreverent foot soldier in the fight against disease, Kris teaches people how to take back their health and live like they mean it. Her work will change the way you live, love, and eat! Find her at kriscarr.com where she publishes an award-winning blog focusing on wellness, patient support, and personal empowerment.
Website: kriscarr.com
IG: / crazysexykris
About Terri Cole
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free.
For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.
She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over 450,000 people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. For more, see www.terricole.com/
Connect With Me
Instagram: terricole.com/ig
Community: terricole.com/vip
FB Page: terricole.com/fb
FB Group: terricole.com/fbg
Podcast: terricole.com/itunes
Resources to Check out
Boundary Boss Book: boundarybossbook.com/
Boundary Boss Workbook: boundarybossworkbook.com
BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/terricole
I’m not currently taking any new one-on-one therapy or coaching clients, but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs. As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp's resources. If you choose to sign up for Better Help's service, I will receive a commission on the referral but please know that I only recommend services that I know & trust.
www.terricole.com/gethelp/ -- If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger the resources on this page can provide you with immediate help.
#terricoleshow #mourning #grieving

[@soulmatesis1]

Beautiful and brutal conversations- so eloquently put.❤

[@PaigeSquared]

My dad passed away a decade ago and it feels like I'm just now starting to understand how many different ways I've been affected. There's a lot of old stuff there, he was the parent I kept trying to talk to, whereas I learned pretty young that I couldn't talk to my mom.

[@PaigeSquared]

Having my son helped me tap into "mama bear mode" where I can stand up to authority figures, for him. I have medical trauma and I avoid medical care for myself because of it. I knew I could not allow that avoidance to extend to his care. I have surprised myself, the times I have stood up and advocated for his care, my voice didn't shake and I wasn't apologetic. My hope is eventually with some experience, this courage will extend to situations where I need to advocate for myself. It feels like I'm being measured and persecuted, rather than supported, by medical staff.

[@terri_cole]

I am witnessing you with so much compassion ❤️ Thank you for sharing- powerful insight!

[@reneewallace8079]

I wish you peace in your healing process. ❤

[@carolynwilson7736]

Kris looks so well! I’m surprised and also very sorry that she has stage 4 cancer.

[@christelnielandt5117]

I LOVED listening to this every minute of it. We live in a society where death is still taboo. I wished I could have been as conscious with my father’s passing away. Now I love to prepare myself if one day my mum goes into transition, or prepare myself as no one lives forever. Can’t wait to get this book. A huge thanks to both of you 🙏❤

[@terri_cole]

So glad you enjoyed listening ❤️

[@candimalice]

Omg that is almost the exact place I'm in! ... 😢

[@kelleydonovan770]

❤

[@terri_cole]

Sending love ❤️

[@reneewallace8079]

Sending love and hope to you.❤

[@LenaCabana]

❤

[@birdie6916]

Wonderful and beautiful interview. Definitely shed some tears during this one. I love Kris Carr (and you, Terri)! Her books got me through my cancer ordeal. Totally relate to the grieving of one's former self and the sadness surrounding opportunities that can no longer be seized due to cancer (eg, having children and returning to life pre-cancer). Grieving what could have been and accepting and allowing my new normal has been---by far---the hardest thing I've ever had to come to terms with in life. What you said about speaking up and saying what you need to say was definitely a YES moment for me. Keep the awesome interviews coming! They are medicine for the soul! Looking forward to reading Kris's new book. xoxo.

[@terri_cole]

Thank you so much for sharing, Birdie ❤️ I'm glad you enjoyed our conversation.

[@betaren21]

Great conversation! I identify with the mourning. I hope it can heal. I wish Kris peace upon her father’s passing.

[@terri_cole]

❤️

[@moen4645]

Thank so much for sharing this delicate conversation. Kris & Terri ❤ Is good to know that you have written and expressed your emotional journey as challenging as it is, to bring understanding and comfort to you and others if needed~ 💕

[@terri_cole]

❤️

[@maryannefernholz3903]

Two AMAZING women we are blessed to have guide us on this journey we call life. I resonate with both as my Father (sweet, kind, funny and adored by all) dropped dead from a heart attack the day after Christmas in 2000 at 71 & My Mom passed from lung cancer after a 3.5 yr fight in 2016 at 77. Life changing loss for sure, but losing 2 Uncles, 3 friends, my Brother and Husband (Covid related heart attack at 56, in our home, found by my eldest child at 19) in a 3 month period has left me numb. As our sole support and in charge of our finances, there has been NO time for me to allow grief to consume me or be dealt with. I keep pushing it down and stopping the tears in an attempt to keep up with the pace of survival mode. How does someone like me deal with the grief in a healthy manner? I know the eventual melt down will come, I just pray the timing is right so the house of cards does not come crashing down! Thank you both for your inspirational words end guidance. It helps to know I’m not alone.

[@terri_cole]

I am witnessing you with so, so much compassion, Maryanne. Sending lots of love and strength ❤️❤️ I address grief in this Q&A (first Q): kzbin.info/www/bejne/d3u7c6aff6-ci6c If therapy is accessible for you, I also invite you to look for a grief therapist (if you can take an hour a week for yourself). I recommend BetterHelp if online counseling is easier, or you can try searching for local groups online. ❤️

[@vanessaware1272]

Thank you Kris ❤ wonderful chat love ya's heaps!

[@terri_cole]

❤️

[@mbrand2838]

I really am thankful Kris wrote this book. Every situation is different and emotions do get messy. I just remember feeling estranged from my body and could not grieve for quite awhile. I would recommend people do talk more about grief because sooner or later it will happen. I have also found people grieve not always in the moment like you see in a movie. Grieving is as personal for each one of us and there are no real timelines. It is a subject that should be handled with sensitivity and frank conversation. I wish that it had not been this uncomfortable topic ever since I can remember from my youth. I really enjoyed this interview and kudos for you writing the book. ❤‍🩹

[@terri_cole]

Completely agree. Thank you for sharing and watching ❤️

[@edinaalic4500]

Beautiful conversation. Thank you 🙏

[@terri_cole]

Thank you for listening! ❤️

[@valebilan]

Being in both ends, being grateful and sad..this was eye opening, my God, like that emotional state is real and is totally normal... always so intersting with you and your guests Terr 🥰💞

[@terri_cole]

So glad it was eye-opening for you ❤️

[@moen4645]

Beautiful book Kriss, thank you! ❤ Enjoying every page. I think you are amazing and strong. ✨✨✨

[@Sosoosooo]

You two look so much alike; it's uncanny! ❤

[@terri_cole]

❤️

[@michellet796]

Yes I went through a year of shutting down my tough emotions when I was taking care of my parents' health issues & the complications that came along after. For me it really did (& sometimes still does) feel like if I let myself feel tough feelings that I will be complete lost & fall apart. I cant imagine how tough it is to process the grief around a cancer diagnosis. Thanks Terri for this & so many other podcasts, posts, etc that have helped me set healthier habits.

[@terri_cole]

Thank you for sharing Michelle ❤️ You are so not alone.

[@karmenchristensen9845]

❤ So good. Thank you.

[@terri_cole]

❤️

[@elizabethbrehm8996]

I’m in love with this channel thank you Terry What a great podcast

[@terri_cole]

❤️❤️❤️

[@crissycobain8361]

This is so deeply helping on a very real level. Thank you.. I went through cancer and lost 3 uncle's one with als and two to cancer as well.. all with in 3 years along with covid. I walked across the street and got hit by an air plane. Thank you for sharing this extremely tough time. Hugs and love to you both 💗

[@terri_cole]

I am witnessing you with so much compassion and sending love ❤️ Thank you for watching.

[@crissycobain8361]

@@terri_cole Thank you, you are wonderful!

[@katsresto982]

❤ Great conversation !!!! God i need to hear that … from both of you!! Excuse my language but I need unfuck myself..Thank you Terry for like always very meaningful episode ❤❤❤

[@terri_cole]

I am so glad it resonated with you ❤️❤️❤️

[@ambervelasquez904]

What’s the line between “experiencing ” and “drowning”?

[@terri_cole]

I think that's very individual and would recommend professional help or services for anyone who feels overwhelmed by grief ❤️

[@LordDaffodilX]

Would you be willing to come to my psychoanalytic institute in Manhattan called CMPS and give a lecture?? We love you