What To Expect From Narcissists After No Contact

Narcissistic abuse is an undeniable crisis. Discover Healing, Empowerment, and Authentic Living...
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The Royal We has helped Millions to escape the grip of narcissistic abuse. Here’s a deeper look into what narcissistic abuse looks like and steps to heal from it:
Narcissistic abuse looks like:
Lack of Empathy: Narcissists often show little to no empathy for others, making it easy for them to manipulate and exploit. Narcissists use various tactics such as gaslighting, love bombing, and devaluation to control and dominate their victims.
Common Tactics Used in Narcissistic Abuse:
Gaslighting: Making the victim doubt their own reality and sanity.
Love Bombing: Showering the victim with excessive attention and affection to gain control.
Devaluation: Undermining the victim’s self-worth through criticism, belittling, and emotional neglect.
Isolation: Cutting the victim off from their support systems to increase dependency on the abuser.
Triangulation: Using others to create jealousy or competition, keeping the victim feeling insecure.
Healing from Narcissistic Abuse
How to begin healing from narcissistic abuse:
Understand that you have been enduring narcissistic abuse. This awareness is the first step toward healing.
Get Help:
Work with The Royal We to get the tools to understand and process your experiences. Visit - www.jointheroyalwe.com
Establish No Contact or Low Contact:
Limit or completely cut off communication with the narcissistic abuser. This helps you gain emotional distance and begin your healing journey.
Rebuild Your Self-Esteem:
Engage in activities that boost your confidence and self-worth. Surround yourself with supportive, positive people who value and respect you.
Educate Yourself:
Learn about narcissistic abuse and its effects. Knowledge is empowering and can help you recognize patterns and avoid future toxic relationships.
Practice Self-Care:
Prioritize your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Regular exercise, a healthy diet, adequate sleep, and mindfulness practices can all contribute to your recovery.
Set Boundaries:
Develop and maintain healthy boundaries in all your relationships.
Connect with others who have experienced narcissistic abuse. Join The Royal We Support Group - theroyalwe.kar...
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[@brendastein404]

I'd rather adjust my life to their absence than adjust my boundaries to their direspect!!!

[@ZoSlater]

FACTS

[@27bobbyrix]

Spot on

[@mamam.d.8898]

Holy sh*t that’s a powerful comment ! Love it !!

[@con9779]

Highly underrated comment.💯

[@Butterflyyyy9]

Exactly

[@dre22]

As far as Narcs go, time is a great healer. The longer you stay away from them, the happier and healthier you become.

[@lianecornils8733]

As far as Justice for Gabbie victims. Imprisonment or death was their healer.

[@dre22]

@@theantinatalistinformant You will never get closure with a Narc. Just more aggravation if you attempt to get one. Move on and never look back. The greatest punishment you could ever give them is complete and utter silence.

[@dre22]

@@theantinatalistinformant Everyone has their epiphany and staying away from the narc alone is a good healthy starting point even if the person is struggling to make sense of it all. You are never going to get closure even if you manage to make sense of it all. The narc is always going to serve as a blind spot which you simply need to put to the back of your mind.

[@TurtleTrader]

@@theantinatalistinformant You are not wrong ... but ​ @Dre IS correct. Absolutely (No Contact) is by far the best way to heal and move on from experience with a Narcissit; but you CAN "understand what happened" if you want to go there---but remember, it will be a one person journey. I feel in my heart-of-hearts for anyone who marries and has children with one, I feel for them.

[@ajik88]

time does not heal wounds. it's you and what you decide to take action. you can hang in a 5years loop after a narc, if you don't pole your mind in the right order.

[@dyoung2739]

Narcs are experts at being "fake" nice. They want to show everyone to that they're the better person in the relationship.

[@ivanichiva]

They label you "insane". And they are right it is insane to engage with them.

[@ELIZA-kz9mf]

@@ivanichiva correct

[@rain3743]

I can be fake nice right back, and then take a "spiritual shower' when I get home. "Flush that!" is right, Kevin!

[@Tokemon72]

Spent 14 years with my partner. Split up 7 months ago for the third time. Until now I only am learning what a narcissist is. And regardless of having knowing that. I have had no contact with her since our last breakup. Hope to keep it that way. These videos have been helping me know I wasn't going crazy.

[@dyoung2739]

Tokemon72 same here. I thought it was me too

[@galeunderdue6905]

Narcissist DO apologize! It's just disingenuous!

[@roncarpenter7240]

Their apologizes have the sincerity of a rattlesnake.

[@wayfarinstranger2444]

Yea, like I'm sorry but I don't know want I Did

[@wayfarinstranger2444]

what I Did

[@wayfarinstranger2444]

Classic

[@len1045678]

Sorry for put you on the spot or sorry that you feel that way is one of does way they apologize

[@esieffer]

"Interesting game. The only winning move is not to play."

[@PineappleHazeExpress]

Thats what lost me. I didn’t understand why he said to wait a year? Then to go back into something not trying to help either person but to waste time. Why not get restraining orders #1. #2 move and change numbers. Its really a small fix. And it also doesn’t take that much work with the help of family.

[@sirquincywashington7584]

Ignore them

[@westcoast747]

Sometimes losing is winning, cut them adrift, let them sink without you.

[@shockleyjulia7126]

Agreed

[@shockleyjulia7126]

Already did that. Means nothing.

[@lisarochwarg4707]

If the family is poison, forget about them. Don't even show up.

[@ivanramirez8145]

True, go your own way.

[@SST4SSG]

​@@ivanramirez8145 Lindsey Buckingham warned us about self-professed witchcraft woman, Stevie, but no one wanted to listen! kzbin.info/www/bejne/pavPZH9vm81-qqcsi=IFGAhodEBMdQlRRp

[@sharhughes1086]

Big mistake if you ever think they will change, learned the hard way been No Contact now going on 3 yrs in July and that's the way it will stay forever!

[@TheRoyalWe]

💯👑🙌

[@wlknonsonshine]

Yay!

[@FM-gv4yl]

Same Here xxx congrats

[@rohithreddy75]

There's a reason why they wont change.They can't be satisfied.The reason is a Mystical one which is karmic. Never expect a narc to change.An empath on other side can change completely from 0 to 1000.

[@katey624]

Was it hard the whole first year, I can't seem to leave longer than 3 months I'm back😔

[@RN-gx7wt]

Expect nothing, do not invest, avoid their void, stay away from that reality.

[@TheRoyalWe]

Yes 👑💯🙌

[@BrendaBaBoom]

R N You pretty much summed it up!! Thx.

[@RN-gx7wt]

@@BrendaBaBoom Your welcome.

[@jonathansione7397]

The Royal We what if I have no choice but to have contact because of a child.

[@maxwellsmart6487]

Sad thing is why and how they can suck you in to their chaos and *Dominence* they want as much of your soul as they can steal.

[@Niles-Guy]

I expect NOTHING from the narcissist. Even if children are involved, the narcissist are cut off . Zero contact means zero contact . Because narcissist thrive off what you say. Whether it’s positive or negative words they will take what you say, twist it and then lay total blame upon you . Grey rock the hell out of them and show no emotion

[@dyra5621]

Well said I have a child with a narc and it was totally impossible to coparent or have any dealings with them. No contact is the best recovery. Silence is powerful I have learned to be quiet and love myself and move on!!! 🙌🏿

[@jevonbivens6399]

@@dyra5621 how did they react to no contact

[@tammyrules2000]

What is grey rock

[@Niles-Guy]

tammyrules2000 ignoring the narcissist. Total cut off

[@margaretrefile8207]

🙌🎯

[@CatTigress1]

My own experience taught me that you must NOT even smile at them... don't give them ANY kind of attention...for narcs it is a cue that you are opening up to them again and they will start stalking you. Even if it seems rude, ignore them entirely!

[@TheRoyalWe]

💯👑🧡

[@lululuv1520]

Yes I learned that the hard way

[@JamesThomas-zl9er]

I used to wave if I saw her running, but since going NC 50+ days 👍 I don’t bother, and even crossed the road to avoid her when she called out a few weeks ago. The big win though was not falling into the trap of feeling guilty about that and texting her later… done and done

[@elhadjdiallo633]

Yes yes !!! Narcs are toxic , delusional, vicious , malicious, malevolent and dangerous!!! I will never let anyone abuse me ever !!! Don't get me wrong i love people with all my heart i have learn to love people from a distance because i don't know what they're doing behind close door or the scene!!!!! People been wondering if this handsome and intelligent dude speak English I'm referring to me , i do speak pretty and also I'm well educated dude !!! I give narcs silence treatments etc....

[@CrumblyTriscuits]

Exactly, the grey rock is boring, not interesting.

[@boooootch]

Expectations are resentments waiting to happen.

[@Vanessabobessa10]

Wow great way to put it

[@LisaMarie82.]

Great comment! Well said!❤

[@Noemie291]

what

[@psychictruth5037]

💯

[@heidi6630]

Unbelievable timing. I was to go to a funeral tomorrow with a slew of the narcissists in my life....soon to be former husband and his family.....I’m not going! Not worth the effort of pretending to be ok with it all.

[@alabamatrixie7379]

Stay strong, Heidi ❤

[@heidi6630]

alabama trixie thank you! ❤️

[@lovelygirls7625]

@@heidi6630 the best decisions you make. No need to spend your time if your not into it. I did the same and l have no regrets!

[@lovelygirls7625]

@@samanthahemingway3666 Exactly you never win with those crazies!! Lol Trust yourself. They are the unfortunate to have you there in the first place. Keep your head high to thses narcs. Lol....Enjoy life without carzies! Cheers!

[@lovelygirls7625]

@@samanthahemingway3666 only go if your ready and strong in the inside. My dad died and l didn't reach the furnal really made up my mind that l aready said my goodbyes in the hospital before he died. I don't need to spend no more time with these families who are narcs! I did not go. But went to a better place where we use to hang out where l can remember him peacefully. Cheers friend. You can always connect with your love ones in the energy space.

[@tina6197]

Why suffer when they feel nothing.. understand that and you might have a chance

[@The1966chevyvan]

Well said Tina!

[@TheGoodboy90250]

My best inspiration!!!to heal!!!

[@Simon-my8pv]

Boom🔥🔥🔥 Very well put❤️

[@nabilc1667]

Because I have a heart and they don't

[@user-hx6qp2rf7z]

I have a narcissistic mother and every time I try to cut her off that’s exactly what she does. She reverts to being the sweetest person I’ve ever met. Once I fall for the act she starts her cycle of abuse again.

[@sandrakm3728]

Amira currently going through this recycle with my mom.

[@rediettadesse2828]

I'm going through this now and I am economically dependent on her

[@user-hx6qp2rf7z]

Sorry it keeps happening guys I’m not dependent on her for anything except the fact that she’s a grandmother to my daughter and sometimes I need her to watch but I don’t even do that anymore I want my daughter to have a loving upbringing and to be able to have grandma there but she sickens me I can’t take it anymore

[@rediettadesse2828]

@@user-hx6qp2rf7z If I have ur privilege I wouldn't let her abuse me 😢😢😢

[@user-hx6qp2rf7z]

rediet tadesse youre absolutely right and I say that to myself all the time I’m just not answering her calls or texts afterall she lives in my brothers house he can take care of her needs. I’m working on that right now, you’ll understand what I mean when you get there. It was so hard growing up in a household where I saw her show complete adoration towards my brother and when it came to me she was a nightmare. I think I’m hanging on to this hope like I’ll hear sorry one day but I don’t think it’ll happen she thinks she did nothing wrong. I was in your shoes once I had just gotten a divorce I didn’t have a job car or money or even a place to lay my head my father asked me to move back in with them (that’s another thing whenever my father tried to show me any kind of love she would make up rumors to make him hate me and abuse me as well) anyways my father ended up having a heart attack and passing away so it was just me and her left. I was in such a depressed state I couldn’t even get out of my bed and she made it worse. She ended up telling me I’m leaving this house your brother has an apartment for me and you can’t come. I didn’t know what to do thankfully my ex husband let me stay with him until I figured things out and I promised myself it would be the last time she ever abuses or abandons me. When I don’t speak to her she runs around telling everyone how terrible I am to leave a sick widow all on her own meanwhile she lives with my brother and he wouldn’t let anything happen to her everyone is under her spell they think I’m the enemy so to save face I talk to her every few days to say hi I keep it short and simple. She never contacts me just to say hi she always needs something from me her last request was she wants me to buy her a security camera that broadcasts directly to her phone to keep eye on one of her properties she’s experiencing some theft at. I just ignore her. If she asks again I’m gonna tell her to ask my brother.

[@anthonymurillo8886]

I finally decided to stop drinking 2 weeks ago. I woke up 1 day and said to myself that I no longer have the need to numb myself from the life I live. By going no contact almost 2 years with my past life I cleaned the slate to start a new life with lessons learned.

[@jadakessie32]

Proud of you

[@anthonymurillo8886]

@@jadakessie32 Maaaaannnnn I'm hammered drunk right now! But still no contact!

[@iraidushka]

@@anthonymurillo8886 Go back to no drinking, please. I made the decision not to drink anymore almost 3 months ago. Precisely for the reasons you stated on your first comment, you made here 10 months ago. Believe me, it was best decision I have made before in my life. I’m giving my life to God. He is my rock and my focus is on Him. Surrender to Him and He will lead you to all truths. Trust Him and He will make your life worth living. Blessings!

[@bonniejohnson760]

I quit drinking and smoking pot almost 6 years ago and I'll never turn back. Staying away from alcohol and drugs is very important and going to 12 step support groups and other support groups to have you be accountable is also very important. Also when u are a part of these groups they always warn you to stay away from shady ppl., places and things which means to stay away from Narcisstic ppl. places and things. If you just do as the group tells u to than you will be alright.

[@melisentiapheiffer3034]

@@anthonymurillo8886 you're going to get cirrhosis of the liver and die. I was binging on food because of all the abuse, but stopped. It is doable, you just need to distance yourself from the abusive person/person's. I stopped my mom from coming to my home for three years. Just started to speak to her recently, but abusive personalities don't change, so it has to be a permanent situation. I have no choice but to be in contact with my overt narc partner, though.

[@LunaVexa]

I’ve been no contact for 7 years now. I was lucky I got out of the scapegoat system at 19. I remember a few years back, my mother called and she was playing the nice card telling me she missed me and loved me. I said “I’m not falling for it” and literally in a SPLIT second her personality flipped and she said in the darkest most malicious tone I was a ‘nasty little shit’ and a bunch of other abusive remarks. She then goes and tells the whole family what she said ‘ohh I just love her so much but I was mad so I said this’ goes and calls like everybody she knows. So when I speak about it they say ‘oh I already know this happened but she loves you’ it’s fkn insidious how much a family can take an abusers side and leave a victim in the dark! But give it time and you will heal. Life has become amazing after no contact and I’ve achieved things I couldn’t have even dreamed of.

[@jacquelinefroehle3583]

Good 👍 for you. I just quit their scapegoat game...42 years of it. GOD I feel so free and relaxed...never having to care what they think or do again. One family member, whom I tried to trust...turns out she is a very Covert Narc.....and she feeds the Narcissist family every detail of information about my life. She behaves as if she decides how I feel, what I think, where I must live. Cutting her off ...will cut off the entire Narc family.....I am absolutely ready. She is not a Taker and a user like her Dad.

[@ProfessorMTeaches]

👍💖🥰

[@athena3865]

I see you have the same family.

[@ericaguilar970]

Good thing you never went back. I did and it got worst. I feel so stupid being back here. 😭

[@tonyaburke5001]

I am happy for you continue up that healthy path ❤.

[@rmiller2741]

The sunrise this morning was beautiful. The heavens declare the glories of God and the works of his hands.

[@TheRoyalWe]

👑💯🙌❤️

[@loverofthelostnarc]

❤🙌

[@mushi9766]

R Miller Amen

[@riyamitraministries]

Amen

[@euanelliott3613]

Amen.

[@knowlightknowright]

Monsters. No contact keeps me calm, happy and SAFE!

[@avanellehansen4525]

I keep a k.ife and a crowbar by where I sit. I have pepper spray and 30 foot wasp spray by both doors

[@knowlightknowright]

@@avanellehansen4525 omg me too....knife and pepper gun next to my bed.

[@conniemeyers9160]

I went back so many times, and I can remember how good it felt thinking they have changed and how much I've missed them. But after a day or two, the yelling, name calling and it turns into a downward spiral. it's so sad because it's my parents and I love them. I have no family. Makes me sad.

[@TheRoyalWe]

😕 you do have family, just not where you think it should be.

[@TheRoyalWe]

The Social Pressure Of Toxic Narcissistic Family kzbin.info/www/bejne/oWfEpWB9j6t0oqM

[@brendancoughlan3487]

Exact same situation as me. My parents are incapable of change because they are still toxic children. Their oxygen is drama and arguments.

[@micktaylor1991]

Connie went back 3 times didn’t no she was narc at time . But she never wanted it to work . There’s always someone in the back ground. Your the monkey tree . They swing from person to person . Godbless you in the healing journey

[@famousstar796]

Same

[@angel772921]

I am NEVER going back! They are so dangerous to my mental health. I would be re traumatised..I broke contact with them all and then some. Thank you..much love. .💗

[@ReaLTruBadGurl1]

My whole entire family are narcissists 🤦🙄😒

[@lizafield9002]

@jane middleton it's called the one world market god of money, everybody focus on self-interest & self-prez. Look at the chief role model in my beloved USA. A reflection of the entire "prosperity" cult. Disguised as "all for Jesus," of course. Pharisees love money & the esteem of others who admire them.

[@euanelliott3613]

I am autistic and I also have schizophrenia and depression. My relatives are narcs with all the behaviour that goes with it. My mother who was also a narc, died last year and my sister lay in bed while I had to register the death and arrange the funeral on the same day. In the four years I've lived here none of my family have ever visited me. They lie, gaslight, smear, betray and withdraw, and I've had enough of all of them. At the funeral they gave me the impression that the family were all back together, and for a while they kept it up, but eventually they began to slip and now I'm away from all of them. Better to be alone than have to walk on eggshells for the sake of company.

[@joycestansfield2639]

@Pigoda Broadway km

[@43cassy]

🙏🏿💫💫

[@CG-bt7oc]

I took the daring, unconventional leap and went no contact with my very toxic narcissistic mother 6 months ago and have never felt more free to be myself! No more guilt, anxieties and fear associated with the relationship. This decision didn't happen overnight, it took many years to come to this point, which in retrospect, I wish I had made sooner. I totally didn't even know about narcissism, nor did I ever think that she had a problem, because as a very sly narcissist can be, she brainwashed me at a very young age to believe that she is perfect and that all issues are my fault. I am 53 and feel like a brand new person! She has made zero attempts to reach me since, which sadly shows how little she actually really cares for me.

[@TheRoyalWe]

👑💯🙌❤️

[@lioydwilliams1850]

C G,hope you are not with a narcissist cause you are too pretty!

[@melisentiapheiffer3034]

Same. I only realized in my thirthies that there is something wrong with her. I noticed her being manipulative when I was in my teens, but didn't think there was something more to it. The fact that she hasn't changed over decades and is still selfish AF made me think that, that is not normal.

[@moscowcowboy_13]

Sorry this happened to you, you are not alone. I am nearly 52 and just figured this all out and went no contact with my mom about a month ago.

[@carlottaventi9556]

So weird, even after two years of no contact, I feel like my Narc isn´t done with me and I still have to be on guard. Can anybody relate to that?

[@kimberlyjager6074]

Yes..., Mine still drives by throwing nails in my driveway, yelling out the truck window , he , still loves me... he , had a key to my house . I had to change the locks on my house because he came in in the middle of the night, I happened to be with somebody it wasn’t a pretty scene he knew I had someone there why would he come in my house we’ve been split up for months, definitely, had to get a PPO on him and change my , locks . I still don’t feel very safe !!! I need a video recorder. Ring ...

[@carlottaventi9556]

Crazy shit

[@onelove269]

🙋🏾‍♀️

[@krissmith7500]

Sure can !

[@hannahloveanna6944]

Players - I'm sure they're still bringing my name up whenever they start their drama even claiming to be me (identity theft); what's happened before, no doubt continues... Doubtful they've stopped playing their games & we know it. They're always on the prowl for new victims, so at some point, maybe they'll forget us. If that day comes, it'll be an answer to prayer.

[@kpj805]

10 years later, I find myself binge watching videos like this to gain support and courage to walk my ass away and save my mind. I lost myself there for a bit. Soon as I was told by a friend what was going on, a great lift off my shoulder. IM NOT THAT CRAZY!!!

[@monicaleone1076]

So true! Let’s all stay away from this lunatics 💕💕💕

[@TheRoyalWe]

👑💯🙌

[@wayfarinstranger2444]

yes the best Way

[@deenm1022]

The mother of my daughter is a narcissist and I’ve recently had to learn how to deal with her and still learning .. I’ve had to build a relationship with God to help get me through this because I was completely going insane ..

[@MC-342]

No I'm never going back. NEVER . Its been 5 peaceful years. Although my sister has tried to torture me by going through my friends . I just don't respond to it. It's hard. But it took me 56 years to attain this peace. Had to cut off all of my family to get away from any possible line of connection with her. She was physically abusive to me when we were kids. My parents refused to acknowledge it and I've paid the price. Thank you for your advice and for everyone's stories. Nice to know I'm not alone

[@bwilliams4266]

I feel that valentines day should be when you decide to love yourself because nobody deserves to be in a relationship with these people, they are terrible people who feel entitled thanks to God for my friend who referred me to a hacker and I was able to hack my narcissistic partner and see all the evidence of that I needed for a divorce and also terrible things that they planned to contact Mike to help him is a genius contact on instagram @mikeswilfred or text / whats-app [phone]

[@debbieaguirre3066]

Same with my sister. I heard through grapevine she is worse.

[@terribleflower555]

Thanks for validating my experience. My sister also physically abused my throughout childhood, but because she was 2 years younger than me, it was treated like she was made of only bubbles and feathers so she couldn't ever possibly hurt me REALLY... no acknowledgement either is what I mean. I hardly read about toxic sisters, so thank you for typing your story.

[@Silvia-jy8zc]

Great advice! No more narcs in my life! 😊👍🏼 God is good!

[@TheRoyalWe]

👑💯❤️

[@urmyaallon7717]

Yeesssss...God is the Great IAM. He saved me from the narc..

[@melisentiapheiffer3034]

So on point. I realized that they want others to see how good they are. They are so manipulative. Oh my word.

[@cindybaker7153]

You were right on target. I hadn’t seen my narcissistic family in 5 years, the sociopath brother in 13 years. They all hate each other, but they came together because of their hate for me is greater. I was there scapegoat. I went to my stepfathers funeral, who was a good Godly man. Without words, there was so much going on there. I prayed a lot and put it in Gods hands. I went in with a smile, treated my mother with respect, and stayed away from the comments and evil glares. I spent time with church people who loved my Dad. After leaving, I realized how evil they are and God has given me a husband who truly loves me. It still hurts but I am thankful. The one thing I am working on is coming to terms with life of lies. I told my husband, imagine going thru life and then finding out everything you were told were complete lies. It’s overwhelming.

[@athena3865]

Just like finding out Jesus Never Existed.

[@sharonandrews9687]

But Jesus did and still does exist x

[@cindybaker7153]

@@sharonandrews9687 my begin of healing was from psalms 27

[@wendyjones6077]

I never understood that you HAVE to play a game with them and it is because they are playing a game with you. They don't misunderstand you, they aren't mistaken and they are horrified that something good might happen to you. When good things do happen to you, most of them are cunning enough to do a fantastic acting job of being happy for you and they will pick information from you when faking the happiness. They will also lull you into confiding in them when something horrible is happening or has happened to you. I did not understand that they are NEVER SINCERE and are always playing a game with you - 100% of the time. This makes it morally necessary for you to play a game with them of pretend you are not angry, pretend that you don't understand their cloaked jibes, etc. When they can bait you into showing anger or arguing, they win every time - it's a rigged game and you can't even imagine what they have in store for you. Most of all, never share ANYTHING with them. Not good news and not bad news. They will hear about it from others and confront you with it and you have to play it all way, way down - both good news and bad news. Never say anything that could be seen as negative about anybody in their presence. They will betray you every time. They will save these things up for years. PLAY A GAME WITH THEM ALWAYS and never let your guard down.

[@TheRoyalWe]

Very well said 👑💯🙌

[@gofishblowfish]

Ahhh, you must know my brother!

[@delorestaylor8114]

Yes so true, My ex narc would “gas light” his daughter in all sorts of ways. I didn’t know anything at that stage in our relationship about the condition of narcissism and thought it Very odd after an obvious “bad” in his behavior toward her. I could tell he knew that I was shocked, and he said to me “ She( daughter) and I play a little game.” How screwed up.

[@aaronwalderslade]

Comment better than the whole video and helped me more.

[@wendyjones6077]

@@aaronwalderslade It took me a lifetime to see these things - I am old. I was raised by full blown NPD older siblings and their fling monkeys. One more thing - back away slowly. Make no sudden moves, make no announcements that you are done with them. Give them nothing to dramatize! Start by monitoring what you say, speak with them less often, deny you are pulling back - say you have become busy and give them a vague response when they ask what you are busy doing. Shrinks call it "gray rock" - I call it backing out of the room slowly. You are a prey animal and if you run they will chase, attack and attempt to "kill." Don't alert them by running or making noise. You will feel better every day and within a year, the separation should be complete enough for you to drop them completely, you will be "gone" enough to be safe from them. You will have slowly developed a new life. It may take longer but that's okay. Good luck and choose new people carefully. It's okay to be totally alone for a while, often it is part of the process. Keep listening to this guy. He is good!

[@secretsquirrel7300]

It's not about expectations any longer. It's about not going back into the situations. I was foolish enough to go back a couple times. Now I never do. I'm completely done. I've blocked/gone no contact with my entire family except my daughter. They're all part of the dysfunction. Why should I put myself through that again? I don't need it. You don't have to be "put back in the situation again". You have the right to choose. Do so.

[@TheRoyalWe]

👑🧡💯

[@MJ-qb5ph]

Seven years out from my ultimate narc nightmare it still amazes me how totally emotionally illiterate they are - it still totally blows my mind

[@axelsmith4722]

My mom did that to me when I came one day to get a few important papers. She put on her best 'nice mom' attitude because the cleaning woman was there. She later pointed out to me that she (the cleaning woman) thought I was rude, mean and standoffish... Thing is... I don't care if random people think I'm a bitch to my mom. I don't care what they think of me because they don't matter to me. I can live happy knowing some people in the world think I'm utter trash.

[@pemmylewis2861]

When i found your channel about a year ago i was a big big mess. Good news. I am working on myself. Lost also 20 pounds. Start to feel beautiful again. Left the narc 4 months ago. I learned the lesson to walk away from toxic people. Than the best news ever: i found my purpose, working on it on a moment by moment bases. I will get there when i live my now, just being happy. I am truly happy FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE.

[@TheRoyalWe]

👑💯❤️

[@vuokkorusso2841]

My mom who is the main narsisstic indevidual has been able to turn all my relatives against me. She uses the tactic of" telling the lie and the crying " and of course " I made her cry".... the whole family believes her lies..thank God we have no judges in the family! I love being separated from the drama and I love my life to the fulllest- without them. My mom invited me to her 95th birthday ,my response to her was " Did you guys cook up a new stunt for me " and I laughed!...She is trying to cover up the fact that the only daughter she has doesnt want any contact with her......she can pass on I do not have any feelings towards her....I feel bad for the little girl inside of me who never had a loving mother but live in hatered. It is ALL ABOUT ME NOW.

[@ajik88]

great, keep it! be aware, that you were unaware. I decided to do the same. The good news. You are allowed to find your real mother in this world. You can decide to have a real nurturing mother... in this world A Rock in the Sea. Everything that little girl needs to follow up and see it is a big girl now. You will meet or met already a great person who gives you the feeling of being complete... So don't worry about the social terminology. I needed to leave my hole family behind.and I am so happy to embrace my new one, when I am healed or even before that. so much is possible without them. And enaugh damage was caused,by them.. wish Us a recharged and loving life!

[@yasemins1313]

This is the story of my life! My mother however is 87.

[@happyhog100]

You are not alone ❤

[@alannarutter5033]

I can happily say that I'll never have to even think about facing them ever again! What a joy and blessing! 🙏

[@mikemccormick8115]

Societal pressure is bogus! It costs you stress and an accompanying shorter life. I’m not shortening my life for anyone, family or “friends” included.

[@TheRoyalWe]

👑💯🧡 nailed it

[@studentberry3131]

That charming behavior is something that makes the normal person cringe because its like you are the only ine who has them figured out and fully know who they really are.. You will look crazy or vindictive trying to express to people who they really are because they are so good at acting and 9 times out of 10 at one point you felt they were the victim on another end and you were fully supportive and advocated for them while they sat back quietly and allowed you.. Sick ass game man

[@SouthernGirl-ce7ws]

Thanks for this video I have been No contact from my ex narc 5 months and I have cried some days because I wished it could have worked out it hurts so bad but I know it will get easier the longer I stay away I don’t miss the abuse I guess it just I’m addicted to him after 16 years ... I refuse to go back to that hell tho Period

[@avanellehansen4525]

The person you fell in love with and good times you miss doesn't really exist.

[@miriamcooper1320]

I don't contact my siblings because they are all nuts and are in a cult. I never have to deal with anyone I don't want to again. Thank god.

[@savannahbennett6864]

Yea what cult flds?

[@miriamcooper1320]

Lds

[@miriamcooper1320]

I was raised latter day saint

[@savannahbennett6864]

I'm glad you find your own happiness

[@miriamcooper1320]

@JLM 414 he is graduating with straight As

[@peacenjoy4366]

I did an awesome 😎 job yesterday ✅ I seen the narc. mother in a restaurant (by herself) 👀 I spoke with a smile 😃 on my face and gave her a hug 🤗 and ask her how have she been? I DID NOT ASK HER NOTHING ABOUT HER DAUGHTER 😳 (standing in line waiting for my food) the Conversation was about 10 minutes and at the end I told her to take care of herself. I walked away feeling so good 😊 and saying to myself (I GOT MYSELF BACK) I was not nervous OR excited. 2 yrs N/C #keep it moving. PRAYING AND THESE VIDEOS ARE WORKING 🙏🏾🎉🔌🥁🎈THANK YOU 🙏🏾

[@wlknonsonshine]

Congratulations!

[@iana6955]

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@ValleyMyStar]

💖💖 you’re so strong !!

[@peacenjoy4366]

@@wlknonsonshine Putting God 1st. In my life 🙏🏾. It works 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

[@peacenjoy4366]

@@ValleyMyStar Putting GOD 1st in my life 🙏🏾 it’s works 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

[@kill1052]

By far the best presentation on the subject. I had recently been going thru no contact. It lasted almost two weeks and I caved in. Before the no contact was broken, I felt better about myself. It ended the same as it always has and now I gotta try again. I will continue to try until i succeed. I'm glad that there are people out there who just say what needs to be said. I appreciate the time and energy put into this video. Thank u

[@TheRoyalWe]

Thank you

[@pattywolford]

My experience, once I labeled him a "narcissist," he ran, gone. They can't stand to be identified.

[@sheilastewart3953]

Yes, they don't like that

[@cm9317]

Very true

[@gabe8776]

I can relate to this so well. My ex husband died and that freed me. However my sister is alive and well. I had no tools available because I didn't understand what narcissistic was. I just knew I loved her more than she loved me. I have started the game with her once more and my next move which has already been initiated is no contact. I'm so grateful today because I'm excusing myself from her chess game. She indeed makes me out like the crazy one. She keeps texting me, and everyday that passes I get stronger understanding what's happening. My body tenses up when I see its her texting me. If she continues to disrespect my boundaries I will block her. She tells everyone I'm the crazy one but today I don't even care. Hallelujah 🌈🦋. I finally feel free 🌺

[@marniegrohs1553]

The narcissist in your life has already made you out to be them to everyone around both of you from the first time they made something up in their delusional mind to be pissed about. Drop them, drop everyone around them and move and start over. There is no warning anyone around them and they will stalk you to thwart any new friendships, relationships, jobs, roof over your head, etc. You also need to take time to be self aware and clear the behaviors you picked up from this person because unfortunately that is real. I gaslighted someone working at a estate sale, not even thinking about what I was saying and as I was driving off thought, wtf, why did I do that. I was never that way before. Felt horrible, realized where I got it from which put me back into thinking about I need to watch what I say before I say it to not piss the narc off that was part of the abuse that causes anxiety. Had to learn that it's ok to make mistakes and forgive myself.

[@crystalmorgan9118]

I wasn't going to put this here but i am in no contact. I am at peace that i will never see my family again and happy not to let them in my life again. I regret not going no contact earlier

[@daisyx1002]

I hope you are at peace, God bless 💕

[@loissemanek1715]

This is the best explanation of what happens I’ve yet to hear! After going no contact with a narcissistic sister I decided to see if I could stay connected again. As you say the pattern is always the same but I avoided the rage using grey rock. If you want to be yourself this is not acceptable as it really changes nothing because it’s just tolerating crazy. The first rant at me I knew it was time to stop trying to get along with someone that think she’s entitled to control everyone around her. Keep making these videos for family of origin and siblings

[@rain3743]

This is pure gold. Thanks! i have a new strategy/tools for dealing with the "polished poo" that is my family of origin at a social gathering. Great advice! 1) no expectations. 2) awarenesx that I have evolved and healed from desiring a relationship. I retired from the role of scaoegoat, and barely being "tolerated, " to "I'm going to be pleasant, polite and responsive. I will "tolerate" THEM for 3.5 hours." That's it.

[@moscowcowboy_13]

I said the same thing about 30 years ago and just went no contact, I really regret no going no contact back then.

[@jenniferanne8338]

Either a Hoover months later Or silence for the rest of your life

[@CobraDove1111]

Omg, YES

[@annasarris7098]

The narcissist I was with was a leech who kept sucking away my energy. I always felt lethargic and tired. I thought it was old age.. But no. And I'm learning that it doesn't just stop when you leave them. He, the leech, is able to STILL take my energy. I think he must practice black magic because how else do I explain this? I can feel it when it's happening. So are these people not just mentally ill? Are these people demons? Or vampires? Witches? Warlocks?

[@MrsCheckpointJesus]

Yes, you are right. There can be a spiritual context. Some say, there are evil entities, demons and or witchcraft involved. Maybe not in all narcissist, but in some. I think so too. They can be obsessed with demons and need delivery through JESUS CHRIST!!!! God bless you and protect you!! Bible says: we fight not against humans but against evil demonic forces in the spiritual,realm.

[@NyllaRaee]

Demons

[@kristen9827]

Definitely demons

[@christinehallett3197]

Yes yes and thrice yes. Malevolent demons

[@RJ-hx5nb]

Kevin, your timing! This just happened to me! No contact for 2 and 1/2 years,,,,. Then last week there was a knock on my apartment door. (We live in the same high rise bldg) I did not answer. The narc left a bag on my door. Now I'm talkin the month of January (just last week) and in the bag was a teddy bear dressed as a Santa Claus (also it was not new but 'used' and maybe even from a dumpster). Also there was a Christmas card in his handwriting and it said, "Sorry for the many injuries, I had a lot of baggage"... I didn't believe this "sorry" for a second. 2 days go by and I saw him in a hallway and he says, "Oh, how did you like the teddy bear?" I did not respond, but just kept on walking. The next day, I'm getting into the elevator as he is getting out. He says in a real snotty tone: "Aren't you going to say Thank You? Oh yeah , that's right, you never say Thank you". I did not respond. He hasn't changed a bit.

[@smoozerish]

Move to another building. The situation you describe is completely bonkers and insane.

[@kkdream99]

R J Happened to me again last week, I had been no contact for 5 months until he showed up at my home door with a big bag that was supposed to be my belated christmas present - honestly why would he even think in the first place that we should change gifts if I had blocked him everywhere. There was also a shitty rushed card with some sob story and how he will always love me and wait for me. My guess is - he suddenly ran out of supply and thought using a christmas present would be a good chance to show up after all these months...

[@TopHat_VR828]

Where u supposed to be elated by a dumpster diving gift lmao lmao..the best apology is changed behaviors

[@rain3743]

Their "gifts"...😂😂😂😂😂 It's like they are all the same person!

[@rebirthed1274]

He sounds like a psycho

[@rachelallen7957]

My mother spread horrid disgusting rumors about me. She even had nasty weird people harassing me for her for the last 6 years. She tried to break me. She can’t. I’m ready to stick up for myself. Leave it alone. Move forward

[@robertl7239]

My reaction to this video: "Oh, so you've met my sister".

[@cuzblueyes]

Robert L was thinking that too

[@rain3743]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 same!

[@margaretwebb389]

Mine too!!!

[@justqueenie1480]

They will always have a black 🖤 don't fall for the fake niceness

[@lumity238]

So True, and they never leave you alone, if you have Children together it's Hell,and he even has a girlfriend he's been seeing for years behind my back. They have a son same age as my son. So I just move on, and take care of what I have to do, take care

[@christinefrances5598]

This is my first rime here. After 5 months, my narc cousin with whom I initiated no contact due to no respect for me nor my boundaries, has been initiating invitations just dripping with warmth and kindness. I've given up via email polite but brief regrets. My therapist noticed leaps and bounds gains sense leaving this toxicity behind!

[@rain3743]

I agree with cordial civility. "Hi, hello." Then get out. I do gray rock, emotionally..I don't give any reaction. I couldn't care less what anyone else who's believed their smear campaign thinks.

[@oscarwilliamson1264]

Rainbo,you are so beautiful 🌹🌹🥀🥀🥀🌹and I will be glad to know you

[@jkwjcw3ify]

I do not go back for any reason. once I am pushed to separate myself it's final. I miss family gatherings for this reason. Jesus said leave them and follow me.

[@anothergerman88]

Thank you kind sir. I'm an older man who has had a lot to deal with. And it's hard to teach an old dog new tricks but I'm determined to learn from people such as yourself. You seem to be very presentable and knowledgeable and I really appreciate you. I've been in a relationship now for about 13 years with a woman who's even older than I am and yet she doesn't appreciate me whatsoever. And I never knew why she does the things that she does. I thought I was going mad. Thanks to people such as yourself like a nausea light at the end of my tunnel. Thanks again

[@rolltide7555]

That's what I'm going through now, no contact after 6 months when I caught him cheating with two other women and I more than supported him. Apparently his wife caught him too and moved out and his two supplies dumped him. This guy has no family, no lovers and thanks to me no money. He's hurting bad and he keeps telling everyone he wants to apologize. Thanks to my education from you, I know he can't and won't change. Thank you for all the great work you do that changes so many people's lives for the better.

[@dawnharris6162]

Good for u sista!!!

[@rolltide7555]

@@2010annaalexandra I didn't know he was married.

[@izawaniek2568]

This is exactly what happens and I think your advice on how to deal with the whole encounter is great. Thank you for your support Kevin.

[@thisblackgirlslife]

I’m in the same situation with my moms family. They schemed against me while my mom was dying and I had no idea she was dying. They weren’t even going to tell me about the funeral. They told the funeral home and other relatives absolute craziness so that I’d be isolated at the funeral. Anytime I feel some kinda way about not having family, I just think : I dont want these people judging, lying, in my business, gaslighting, scapegoating, scheming for my money. I don’t want my child exposed to these losers. Especially since I inflicted the ultimate narcissistic injury- 2 months after they abused me at my moms funeral, I got online and physical restraining orders against them because of their internet smear campaign; I had the local sheriff make “personal visits” to make sure they would leave me alone; I’ve been no contact since 2013.

[@natalieleonard5876]

So glad for these videos. It helps bc I’m wanting to save the narcissist from themselves. I miss my narcissistic friend but not when they are mean to me or their children, that I adore. I hope my friends get peace. I won’t be tempted thank you. Bc they wanted me to be a flying monkey and I realized it. It made me open my eyes

[@kristen9827]

Me too.. I’m letting it go

[@laughandluxe]

I've learned a lot about this type of personality from you and others here on youtube.

[@urmyaallon7717]

Yessssss..so do i. God blesss.

[@melberry7055]

Thanks for the refresher! Timely after a 15 year lie & nearly 2 years of legal processes! Thankyou 💚

[@TheRoyalWe]

👑💯

[@dangeier9318]

Thank-you so much. I have been watching your videos for almost 8 months. I've always been a strong mentor that passionately built leaders. Being married and seperated to a covert narcissist literally brought me to my knees. I just wanted to say thank you. You are appreciated.

[@ajik88]

great comment!

[@lazarocuellar6130]

That is true! Let it go! Move on with your life away from them , and yes they will look for another target if they can after every one finally see through their vail of abuse!

[@editadelsolar9656]

NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, ....RUN!!!!!!

[@arlenefrango4951]

Flushing my narc out of my system for good! He tried to contact me again and this time I refused to play his sick game!

[@kre8iveingenuity228]

Family, what is that anyways? When I needed them most they weren't there. My Aunt said to me on the phone, "I'm still your aunt: L.O.L." I said quietly to myself, ya you wont even notice when I'm gone & when I change my name, you won't find me: so it doesn't matter what you think!!

[@andriesquast2028]

Krys Bosch Same here. The word "family" doesn't mean a thing to me.

[@kre8iveingenuity228]

@John May 4sure. Curiosity is good. Looking for something more meaningful, under the circumstances of where our families have lead us, I draw the line @. Those who wear out their welcome are estranged. My home is my place of solitude & little peace of heaven on earth. I long for the trumpet sound!!

[@katemitchell665]

I’ve always said, “I could go into the witness protection program and it would make no difference to my family”.

[@pemmylewis2861]

I kiss the day i found the Royal We. So grateful that you go on with what you do for us. You teach us not to be afraid of people who treat you wrong. You are the right fire with what you do. Your uniqueness is awesome and very inspiring. With that fire you keep us awake and real (read happy)! Warm greetings for you from The Netherlands!

[@TheRoyalWe]

👑❤️ Netherlands 🇳🇱 ❤️

[@trudywoelders486]

🇨🇦🇳🇱🙋‍♀️

[@tonifool7423]

When the narc is nice its so uncomfortable.. It's like the calm before the storm. U can just feel it.because they are not nice. Their fangs are showing

[@LaNereNere]

When the narcissist is your mother and you have to take care of her, you are the only child...🥺

[@maedrosbott5274]

Its identity management, they are always protecting the false self

[@lisananny8212]

What a perfect term! “Identity Management” I will remember this!!!

[@CobraDove1111]

Yes!!

[@blessedlady7815]

Always on point, Great word my brother!

[@neverwhere1391]

New Subscriber here! I removed the Narcs obsessing over me from my social media-and as I expected, one in particular had taken steps to secure the personal address of Someone who has NOTHING to do with them but is connected to me, just to be spiteful! This is what they do! They NEVER want to let go. They want to make their presence felt at all times. Repulsive creatures!

[@jpogera9939]

The greatest gift one can give a narcissist is ur silence... What a warm feeling...it's like they died .grieve and grow for another day

[@sonnyaman7168]

Im going no contact with my father for the 3rd time.i needed this video in my life right now thank you very much.

[@justinesimone5343]

No problem. I have no expectations. My narcissistic sibling has ruined all of my relationships by lying to them about me! She’s sweet and quiet (has a psych degree) so lies using truths mixed with ½ truths, just enough to make lies plausible. No one will even give me time of day. I can’t correct it as I don’t know what to correct nor sounding like sour grapes.

[@justinesimone5343]

jane middleton Sounds like you've used your experience to grow. Still stinks!

[@Matt-co3rt]

I have an evil older sister who did the same thing. Anyone who overtly or covertly followed her lead is NO LOSS to me

[@foolishwatcher]

Summed up in 4 words: act like a boss...

[@lemat579]

wow, wait a moment... "when you have expectations of other people in this life, you will be let down" that might be some rough truth... an elephant in the room.

[@sheilajac]

faking it is SO hard though!!

[@hannahloveanna6944]

The victory is in not allowing them to steal your serenity by reacting to their presence, but in being who you are despite who they are. Armor up with the peace that surpasses all understanding - God, who will give you the wisdom & strength to stand against all arrows & fiery darts though faith.

[@johnnyappleseed6960]

It's am impossibility to have that "relationship you've always dreamed of" with these types of people.......They always suck you back in and end up treating you worse than the last time.

[@lauriefavreau6959]

Easier said then done. My husband is a multi millionare. He doesn't want me taking half his money. He doesn't want the truth coming out. Our daughter says I have all the power. Praying lots of prayers for my husband of 45 years. I am a Heyoka Empath, I am strong, I am enough. Wish me well, wish my husband well.

[@unfortunato]

I'd never have guessed a person like you ever had to deal with narcissistic parents. In fact, most I rarely ever see a person that has been through abuse. You and them, you all look perfectly healthy. Like a great person. And that's what you are. You deserve no less than the best this life has to offer, and while it hurts, why should you stay close to those who want to see you fall? I hope you all can heal as time passes.

[@Nathanaelle10]

i remember this channel early last year soothing my pain and calming down my sores oh God... thank you.

[@lizzettorres1111]

My mother and my son's wife are narcissists. I'm so glad I came across this channel. I've already cut my mother out of my life

[@suzannejensen8218]

This is great as I am meeting up with two toxic sisters for lunch after 7 yrs. Thanks for the help!

[@SmileydeadJ]

Hey man thanks for your videos been watching for a while now. Your videos definitely helped me get thru a situation a had with a toxic ex. For those who are still in those hard times just keep watching and rewatching, it took me over a year to finally see it and be over it, so don’t give up on your self.

[@JephyrX]

Good advice. It's easy to keep letting your guard down believing (yet again) that their niceness equals change.

[@JephyrX]

PS: No contact for 11 years now. It was a bit difficult in the beginning - but it not as much of a pain as having them trampling all over me while insisting I was the one with a problem.

[@TheRealJohnHooper]

Well they never change.. but YOU can change.. Thanks to youtube channels like yours :D

[@TheRoyalWe]

👑💯🙌

[@bwilliams4266]

I feel that valentines day should be when you decide to love yourself because nobody deserves to be in a relationship with these people, they are terrible people who feel entitled thanks to God for my friend who referred me to a hacker and I was able to hack my narcissistic partner and see all the evidence of that I needed for a divorce and also terrible things that they planned to contact Mike to help him is a genius contact on instagram @mikeswilfred or text / whats-app [phone]

[@user-yg5hq9zv2t]

So glad for this channel. I'm going for a marathon run of the Royal We

[@danajaye2911]

If you are expecting anything from them or have any interest in their reaction- you aren’t going no contact- you are playing silent treatment hoping for a reaction. Erase them- delete everything that reminds you- txts, images, gifts if you ever got one, even clothes you wore that remind you. Block everything and don’t even discuss them with people. That’s no contact.

[@Moonlight.Melon.Mounter]

Had to run into my narc ex last night, this is exactly how she behaved. So fake.

[@rain3743]

Fakey Fakertons.

[@isabellepimentel718]

Perfect timing! He has been hoovering and visiting my moms house to "see our son". He also for a month now. He called me today and asked me out for lunch... kindly I said not thank you

[@deanwitt7903]

An old guy I knew once who had a lot more life skills than me at the time said to me “Dean always go forward and never go back “ . He was dead right . One has to remember that with a narcissist they have honed their craft over many decades so their behaviour is practiced and entrenched . It is who they are so don’t EVER give a second chance .

[@jeffreyglockner7682]

I've grown up with a narcissistic brother my whole life. No more mister nice guy! This man's dead on the money!

[@aldamendes5024]

We know about those people already! So we don’t give a damn anymore! Those are evils

[@brendalee8491]

The was right on time !looking fwd to sharing my story on the support group soon .

[@riverjordan392]

Looking forward to hearing your story ♥️ The support group is fantastic ♥️

[@SuperQdaddy]

Narcs are always out for themselves...your great until ...someone else shows up

[@frediamorris8535]

This is so helpful to me right now. You are truly helping me in ways that you would Never know. Thank God for you. AMEN. Don't stop your program