What you don't see about depression | Jayne Hardy | TEDxBrum

Jayne is founder and CEO of The Blurt Foundation, providing peer support for those with depression and their loved ones too. Her campaign #WhatYouDontSee swept social media earlier this year as part of Depression Awareness Week and is still fuelling on-going conversations, inviting people to share the realities of living with depression and challenge the stigma surrounding it. Hear Jayne’s courageous account of how she gave up on giving up with the help of those brave enough to share their stories of truth and hope, something her important work now extends to others.
Jayne Hardy is the founder and CEO of The Blurt Foundation. Losing most of her twenties to depression, at the height of her illness she was unable to work, leave the house or undertake the most basic acts of self care. Jayne founded Blurt to prevent others from feeling isolated as she had done. Having experienced the powerful connections that could be fostered via social media she deliberately focused Blurt’s activities online, providing interim support for those struggling with depression and challenging the stigma around mental health. Her most recent campaign #WhatYouDontSee trended on twitter for 4 hours on Monday 18th April as part of Depression Awareness Week. The hashtag has been used over 100,000 times on facebook and a Buzzfeed article about the campaign has been read over 750,000 times. #WhatYouDontSee also gained support from the Mental Health Shadow Minister Luciana Berger, MP Johnny Mercer, and celebrities including rugby legend Jonny Wilkinson.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx

[@miaperfetti8748]

I hate when I tell my friends I have clinical depression then they say "yeah, I think I have depression too. I feel sad a lot." on the outside I just nod, but on the inside I want to scream "sadness is only a small part of depression"

[@justamisunderstoodkidnamed9928]

Dogluver2330946 I know but my friends didn't react to me telling, I then broke down in front of them. They didn't know what to do. Only one of my friends reacted to my break down at our sleepover(twice now). She knew how to care for me when I break down in deppresstion and axisaty. She knew that I would stop in my own time. The freinds who didn't react to my break down was because I hide my Axisiaty and Deppresstion from them. They had no clue what was going on.

[@foofy3406]

Dogluver2330946, yes!!!! they have situational blues. clinical depression is much, much deeper and more insidious.

[@user-xd7co6ix6g]

Dogluver2330946 yup

[@angelicamalinay8913]

We all felt seen by us who only know what it truly feels.

[@ryanong9305]

Just a misunderstood kid named, Bryten I want to give all of you a hug I know the pain all to well

[@teejaykleinuno]

Having to act OK when you're not is the worst part of depression for me. I'm tired of waking up every morning wondering why I am still "here."

[@emmahuttinga943]

I have depression and sometimes I watch videos like yours to make me feel better. I would be dead if it weren't for you guys! Thank you!

[@stevethomas74]

Hey Emma, your comment really touched me because if it wasn't for me having to look after my father, I sometimes think that I would have truly tried to end it all more than once this year. Depression is truly foul and destructive and I've found some great videos on here that talk about it. There's also a couple of great channels too - check out Douglas Bloch and also a guy called Bignoknow If you or anyone else on here who might be reading this ever feel like talking even just online, please feel free to add me on Facebook if you're on there or even just reply back in the comments. It all helps me too x

[@sonaliyadav8795]

Steve Thomas hey how to connect?

[@saurabhp9480]

just search it sonali

[@osamahthabit]

Are you still alive 🤔

[@anuraag7075]

same here

[@TheMysticWolf1]

The worst about depression is when you start to lose people and there is even more pressure to yourself to improve because you dont want end up alone.

[@lsmemr8789]

You are so right!!! It’s so exhausting :/

[@karenk2409]

I did lose people, but discovered those who loved me and helped me to get healthy by their faith in me. When you are deeply depressed, you think you are alone, worthless and a burden. Those who understand and support you help you climb out of the abyss. Finding supportive people, including fellow strugglers and counselors and friends, change your world.

[@ArtgirlRusher776]

I understand exactly what you mean. I’m currently loosing a friend because I had to step back from socializing to focus on my mental health, which they interpreted as me being a bad friend and not caring about them (despite my saying I needed space to work out my issues so my depression wouldn’t negatively affect them). Some people just don’t understand that we are aware of how our depression affects others and we want to spare the people we care about in our lives that we know wouldn’t understand.

[@vee9784]

I have a depression, and this is literally me. But schools dont understand that, its not just sadness, for me its self hate, it might be different for you, but thats the main thing i think: Self hatered, Thinking your nothing, and

[@jaynehardy3856]

Yes, I can absolutely resonate with the self-hatred too. At my lowest, I felt as though I was a waste of a life. I've learned (still a work in progress) that that's what depression tells you about yourself but that it's a skewed perspective because we're unwell. You are not nothing, I 100% assure you of that. Reach out for support from as many different means as possible to help you through (including us at Blurt). Rooting for you

[@jayoliver4078]

My school just(and old friends) said, "Just stop being sad!" or "You're just looking for attention". I have had depression since I was 6, I'm 13 now and it's just got worse.

[@VampiraVonGhoulscout]

When I was a teenager (which was only like three years ago lol) I use to hate it, and I still do hate it, when adults brushed adolescent depression off as "just hormones" or "stress" because of exams, or they'd say "you'll grow out of it, it's only a phase" just because you were younger and they had decided you don't have anything to be depressed about and your thoughts, feelings and concerns were not valid. So I totally get what you're saying. Schools don't teach shit about mental illness and even though there is more information about it than ever it is still swept under the rug and no one talks about it. I saw something going around on Facebook a while back and I totally agree that at some point in school there should be a mandatory project where every student in the class has to pick a mental illness and do a presentation on it so they have an understanding of it. That way less people will be bullied for having one or for self harming.

[@miao601]

It usually doesn't start with self hatred. For example, I have a very common type where you just aren't content. When I noticed it wasn't normal, when I noticed I had depression, I started to think "you're just over exaggerating" until things in my head went a little like this; "No one would miss me if I died, I just wish I could-" "shut up you ungrateful brat you have such a great life and you're complaining about nothing." It still happens now even and my depression is getting worse. I don't know what to do.

[@maelle7635]

You are calling yourself an ungrateful brat, it is obvious that your depression is worst than before. You shouldn't be your enemy, please seek help if you are still depressed. I am, but starting to feel an improvement. For two years I struggled with heavy depression, to the point where I was just rocking, sat in bed all day. At least I think, it is the only memory I have of the past two years. I think you can only start to feel better when something change in you, but until then you have to seek help, try medication over and over again, talk to therapists... Good luck.

[@laney2359]

I wish when you go to the doctor for a check up they would also do a mental checkup, not just a physical check up. That would help people with depression, anxiety etc. like me. That would help so many people. That would be so much easier for help. It's so unbelievably hard to reach out for help than people think it is.

[@sagesheahan6732]

Agreed. It is.

[@idanwillenchik3050]

A general physician isn't qualified to do so to the best of my knowledge.

[@Dorkyorc]

@@idanwillenchik3050 Speaking from experience, there is a standard series of questions, called a K10, that the GP can use to give a generalised rating, based on that they can make a referral to a specialist. The K10 is also available on the Beyond Blue website for anyone to access.

[@sunflowersandhoneybees3937]

@@jamama3 Not the time.

[@RuthEveryoneMakesMusic]

My doctor always does this

[@EricChamplin]

Depression doesn't discriminate. Be kind to strangers, because you don't know what they're going through.

[@hazelivy4349]

I have major depression disorder. Can't even get to work because I'm also afraid to go outside. I needed this.

[@jaynehardy3856]

I'm really sorry that you've been having such a tough time, Hazel. Sending love to you

[@WDLDrider]

Hazel Ivy How are you doing now? I am in the same boat. I fear losing my job because i feel as if i can't even talk. But still i push on.

[@hadiaabd8058]

diggsmiggs I'm sorry you're going through such a taugh thing but keep pushing . I believe that progress comes through simple and tiny details . sending love to all of youuu

[@naritruwireve1381]

Wait are you actually afraid to just go outside?

[@1990AKHIL]

wdldrider70 I saw your post... I think you are fine now... please consult a doctor..if situation is not resolved...let me know if you need any help

[@HirayabyRF]

My depression tells me I can't anymore. I'm tired.

[@becomingdanyelljoe7490]

Ramsdayoff you can keep going don't give up

[@hectoralarcon4835]

You got this man..tolerance is key...its hard...but your resilience will strive...your inner power will move foward

[@blackwolf3803]

Same man

[@nnnooo2437]

This is me right now. Everyone saying that everything will be okay or they’re all judging me for being lazy and unmotivated.

[@pamelahornick8108]

Why do people who've never had depression thinks it's ok for them to tell people with depression that it'll be ok or snap out of it? I wish that for 1 hour all those who think depression is nothing would know exactly what it feels like & then maybe they'd understand. I tell myself every day to not listen to the depression & anxiety. It usually doesn't work but sometimes it does.

[@Pencilandpaperaddict]

Fantastic talk, it was so moving to witness first hand! For everyone watching this, with Jayne's standing ovation she burst into tears and was quickly joined on stage by the hosts who gave her a good long hug as the claps, cheers and hoots carried on. Such a beautiful moment of everyone in the room connecting to a persons emotions, I'm not going to forget that day.

[@jaynehardy3856]

Gosh, I will never forget that day. The love, acceptance and generosity from you all such a moment for me, one that I will truly treasure forever x

[@carissalato9551]

That was one of the most beautiful Ted talks I've ever watched! Thank you!

[@joker9206]

I suffer from severe depression and I can tell you firsthand that it is very difficult to deal with videos like this make me feel glad to know that I am not alone thank you so very much for sharing this video

[@jaynehardy3856]

[@sagesheahan6732]

Neither of you are alone. Some of us get this. Jayne? Thank you, SO much form sharing! That had to take all the courage you could muster. Joker? I too suffer from depression. Everyday. Major Depressive Disorder. It never shuts off. You are far from alone, either of you, and I can not stress that enough. Hugs to you both. 💜

[@VampiraVonGhoulscout]

I have depression, anxiety, borderline personality disorder and complex post traumatic stress disorder. I NEVER discuss it online or on my channel because that's where the trolls live and I feel like I need to keep it private. I often feel like my light is dying like Tinkerbell and need someone to believe in me, but the illnesses won't let me believe it's true when they do and make me paranoid that they're lying and/or being sarcastic when they say it.

[@junimondify]

I believe in you. It may not be much hearing it from a stranger, but know that I suffer from depression as well and would never say something I do not mean.

[@marieschrader9150]

VampiraVonGhoulscout this is me.

[@linabingbing3881]

VampiraVonGhoulscout speak.i have the same diagnoses as u. Bipolar 2. BPD and PTSD. It's healthy to discuss it.its necessary to discuss it. It helps u break and and many others.dont just think of your...self..think of how many people need to hear you....myself included. ::hugs:: I feel so alone eith such intense issues.please I hope u get this comment even though it's been a year.may comment if u have a current video

[@livestreettheaters8042]

VampiraVonGhoulscout I feel u .. sad 😢 idk what to do

[@katywright8161]

You are loved and you're the only you God made. Hang in there!

[@vee9784]

They need to show this in schools. I belive that they just say the BASIC STUFF, and they dont look into the topic. Ti

[@Sean-bz5bc]

I'm a man and I wish I never told anyone about dealing with depression and drinking to cope with it. We are looked as being weak - like only women suffer from this disease. Smh.

[@aj96614]

Sean you’re very brave for sharing this with others. You’re not weak. It’s a disease.

[@sagesheahan6732]

Sean You are not weak. Youre stronger than most for having to deal with this on top of everyday life. I know exactly where you are coming from, Sean. And anybody who tells you thatyoure weak has no damn clue what they are talking about, and can take their opinions and shove it. People who dont understand depression, and use it as an excuse or justification to belittle anyone, have no compassion, no empathy, and no soul. Youre better than them, by far.

[@ninamarie4146]

I hope you're sober now, but if you're not, this will lift your mood immeasurably if you can slowly cut down and then abstain from alcohol. Audible has so so many brilliant titles that can help to deprogram your thinking about drink. It's like having a friend in the room. You're not alone in this x

[@water3252]

WrekkinM wtf man

[@saorise28]

It isn’t fair that men are expected to basically be emotionless. Women are expected to be the emotional ones and neither of these expectations are fair for anyone. You are not weak and your experiences are valid. If anything you are stronger than most men I know if you have spoken about your depression with someone. Even if they didn’t respond how you were hoping, you had the courage to express how you were feeling and that is hard. You are strong and you got this!

[@lesbilover98]

Its real hard to believe in getting out of depression.

[@kablooey2369]

I made it out. I realized that happiness is a choice, a choice of perspective. Try changing your perspective on life to include the idea that everyone around you, all 8 billion people on this planet, have their share of struggles and issues, and that we're all imperfect beings that make mistakes.

[@lukewilliams7061]

Depression isn’t a choice

[@Varue]

@@kablooey2369 this post right here officer

[@Hacks536]

@@kablooey2369 depression is not a choice

[@whatrtheodds]

I dislike being part of this club in fact my brain is telling me all the reasons why this is no good. Still I do find it interesting to hear stories, it motivates me to keep going, I know that worthless crap I keep hearing is just stuff in my head so I watch this remind myself others have it too a keep on fighting, so in that sense I thankyou for helping me help myself. Goodluck Miss Jane.

[@stevethomas74]

I think your comment just echoes what a lot of us with it all think too, my friend. I hope you manage to keep going :)

[@annaeez1226]

You are an inspiration dear lady. Your light shines bright! I see you. Thank you for being you, and being alive. The world is a better place with you in it!!! Thank you for all you do. I love you.

[@justmadeit2]

Will anyone reading this admit that their depression is actually caused by something from their past that they feel guilty or ashamed about ? Because to me that seems to be a huge reason for depression yet no one ever seems to talk about feelings of guilt or shame being the cause of their depression. Can anyone relate?? I have been dangerously low with depression because I struggle to get over things from the past. It gets to become a vicious cycle where I feel I deserve to feel depressed. The struggle for peace of mind goes on.

[@TheresaCox]

I can relate very well. I am not depressed about the memories but when I am depressed the bad memories pop up and haunt me for days and weeks, which deepens my depression. When I am on an upswing I can sometimes push the bad memories away. Sometimes, I even lie to myself and say I have put such things behind me. Yet, I can still suffer over something I did wrong 10 years ago or more. What is this peace of mind you speak of?

[@justmadeit2]

Theresa Cox Hi Theresa, thanks for the comment. It's something that's rarely talked about as a reason for depression yet shameful feelings about things someone has done wrong in the past is a massive cause of someones depression, but it's true when people go through a depression they focus on the negatives of their past. Just to add, I have put together two folders of videos looking at depression from all angles that you and others might find useful. The small folder is my experience of it and the larger one is other people's and making sense of it. Anyway...they are in the Playlist part of my channel titled 'understanding depression'

[@justmadeit2]

I know. Thats one side of it. Im a big believer that in nearly all cases there really are reasons for depression, we just need to dig beneath the surface, some times we are aware of what is causing it, and at other times we arent aware because its something in our subconcious or we have suppressed from a long time ago. I agree with you that there are different things like clinical depression.

[@sadiebutterworth8063]

I can relate and I’m sorry you feel like this, you are strong and I believe in you

[@kiera_g]

This is an important thing to talk about, yes. Past traumas often have an impact on future depression or anxiety. However, depression can also be biological and not determined by any events or occurrences. That’s how it is for me unfortunately :( In a way, I’m jealous that some people have something to point to as the cause (or one of the causes) of their depression. For me it often feels random and completely unfair :(

[@holaamigo8906]

depression isn’t just being sad it is 20% Anger, 40% emptiness, 10% sadness and 30% wanted to die/ feeling everything at least that’s how it is for me

[@Make_it_a_double_xx]

I feel scared this is true for me too. I just want to be a good mom. My mom killed herself when I was 22. It just makes everything worse.

[@adrianameza2102]

yass the anger part is accurate for me

[@dumplinglover8042]

Hi, fellow friend. The emptiness you're talking about, may you go more in-depth? If youre not comfortable doing that, okay

[@annabellgreyward4184]

hola amigo god damn I totally get that !

[@annabellgreyward4184]

Alea C'de Baca I am so sorry. I hope you eventually learned what you needed to from going through that with your mum. 💔❤️

[@blueskies00]

You are a beautiful person Jayne. Thanks for having the guts to go on stage and share your pain and insight into dreaded depression. I was hoping they were going to give you a standing ovation. Thanks for helping so many people:)

[@shelbyolf7215]

I feel tired of myself, helpless and hopeless, I just hate myself so much. I want to reborn in another mind far away by mine. Sometimes suicide seems the only solution and it destroys me. My dad and uncles suffer from depress, so during my childhood I saw what depression was and I have been trying to escape from this nightmare. I'm going to the psychologist since 4 months now, but as I said I feel helpless. I'm 26yo and I'm from Italy, I actually don't know what will be my future, I don't know if I will have one, the only thing I know is that I wanna run as fast as I can from me.

[@LadyDazzleDance]

I completely understand how you feel. Sometimes I feel utterly trapped in being me and if I could just be someone else, anyone else, maybe I'd be happy, just maybe. I wouldn't wish feeling this way on anyone. You aren't alone and I'm sorry you suffer inside. Sending you love from USA 🇺🇸 ❤️ 🇮🇹

[@small_fries7573]

Sorry 2 hear Ruth. Lotsa peeps go through this stuff. I know lotsa men in their 50s, 60s, n 70s who are miserable (like 2 of my neighbors), but they act 🎬 like they're ok. At least u got da guts to show your frustrations n issues. Much props 👏. U lit 🔥 Wish u accept Jesus Christ as your Savior so u can go to heaven after this life. God doesn't expect you to be perfect nor sinless. He just wants u to believe in Him as your Savior for your sins so u can go to heaven after this life. You are precious. May God provide hope to u and ur uncle/dad.

[@small_fries7573]

@@LadyDazzleDance Wish u accept Jesus Christ as your Savior so u can go to heaven after this life. God doesn't expect you to be perfect nor sinless. He just wants u to believe in Him as your Savior for your sins so u can go to heaven after this life. You are precious.

[@small_fries7573]

To make u feel better, I have a 55 year old, obese neighbor who is afraid to exercise, lose weight, n change her mindset n thinking 🤔. She lives in total self-denial. She can barely walk correctly. She doesn't listen n just denies anything wrong with her. She's like 250 lbs...

[@GtaRockt]

This is amazing I can relate to so many feelings she described and I know how hard it is to talk about it Jayne, you are so brave and amazing. It always astonishes me what lengths many depressed people go to help others Thank you so much, the world needs more people like you

[@LukeShort1854]

That takes alot of guts. I have depression and anxiety. I haven't left my house since 2013. So it gives me hope, when I see you have the bravery to talk about it. I hope you're well in this crazy year we're having. And thank you for wanting to help others beat their depression, that you overcame yours to speak.

[@freeeggs3811]

Wow that might be a world record.

[@aleroxxg9866]

Watching videos like these makes me feel less alone.. ♡

[@mezlabor]

I know all these feelings too well. I'm so tired. I feel like its winning the void is getting bigger and I dont love anything anymore. every day is empty.

[@blackwolf3803]

Yep me to everything just seems meaningless

[@blackwolf3803]

I am hopeless

[@manthanpathak5780]

Thank you Jayne. I've been battling, mostly losing the battle, with depression for many years. Too long. I was in tears as I finished watching you. You are incredibly brave and inspiring. Please know that. Thank you.

[@jenniferr.7588]

I'm crying, thank you so much jane, you're brilliant! I know exactly what you're telling about. All the best for all who a suffering from depression. You're not alone ♡♡♡

[@alisaperez3716]

Oh man the beginning made me cry hard, it put into words everything I haven't been saying. I'm so grateful for this woman and what she's doing!

[@alisaperez3716]

Ok I'll admit that i rewatch this often just to hear the beginning again and again cuz I feel so understood

[@The_Lazy_Crafter]

THANK YOU Jayne Hardy.. you where inspirational, brave and sooo nervous and my heart just went to you. Thank you for keeping the dialogue open on depression, it is the worst thing to go through and it has literally ruined my entire life! 12 years on and I'm still struggling but it's lovely to hear how you have turned your personal hell into amazing help for others Well done and hugs to you ❤❤❤❤❤

[@karend169]

This is a place I can come and say I have clinical depression and no one will say, me too. I will not be judged and everyone here has the same illness. It's a comforting feeling.

[@fifteenseptember]

I was confused where to turn to for help to take care of a sibling suffering through depression, and I stumbled upon Blurt randomly. Your guides literally saves lives, and I don't even live in the UK. Thank you for everything Blurt Foundation has done. For those that feel lost, I see you, I support you. You will get through this, please seek help from people you trust or look through Blurt. You are amazing. Big hugs!

[@flam3427]

I think I have depression and have had for a few years, but people just brush it off as 'your just sad' or 'it's because your a teenager' 'you'll grow out of it', like because I'm younger I can't have real life problems that affect me on a daily basis

[@becomingdanyelljoe7490]

Flam3 have you gotten help yet like talked to a therapist?

[@NiNjaAttack35266]

Flam3 get a diagnosis from a professional. My parents thought the same thing when I was teenager. I went to college and my undiagnosed depression became so bad that by senior year everything became so insignificant and I saw no point in anything anymore...

[@onthemantlepiece422]

I’ve watched quite a few of these vids on depression, and the one thing that they all leave out, because it’s outside their conformist, middle-class comfort zone is alienation… Complete, total and unbridgeable alienation! To the alienated, I say this, ‘use that gift to do the things the others never even imagined’.

[@CosyKat]

Jayne, you did BRILLIANTLY! I cried so much during this, as it is so powerful, but so True! Stay strong xx

[@jamesduggan65]

Going through depression myself and love listening to this girl.

[@TitanEagle]

This was literally the most amazing video. Thank you for sharing your words and sharing your story with the truth and rawness associated. I have never heard someone speak my story so quickly and break me down to the point of acknowledging this was me. Thank you so much for being that voice in the clouds to say, I was never alone. Often when dealing with my own struggles of depression to even admit it, would send me into a rage because I was angry. But, like you had even said, seeing it on social media people talking out your story, gives you a sense of empowerment. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!❤‍🔥❤‍🔥❤‍🔥

[@smithy7034]

This video has made me sob, uncontrollably. I have mixed anxiety and depressive disorder, traits of bpd, and fibromyalgia. The last girlfriend I had, said I was lazy, there is nothing wrong with me, I should get back to work. She had a degree in psychology. I think she got it at the micky mouse club house. Thank you for this video, keep up your wonderful work. ❤x

[@foofy3406]

Chris Smith, people always accuse us of being lazy. being depressed is the most strenuous exercise there is!

[@fernandagaribay7145]

this video gave me so motivation. I have depression and these encouraging words help me through my worst days. thank you. depression is real. depression CAN be managed.

[@jesseredwards]

I don't have depression but I have panic disorder and agoraphobia. Thanks for sharing.

[@jaynehardy3856]

Thank you Jesse

[@dougear]

+Jayne Hardy You are so brave, it's really inspiring me to use my experience to help others. I could see how shy and nervous you were, and still did a great job. Thankz and congratulations my dear.

[@Klespyrian]

Would you be able to explain to me what a panic attack feels like? If it makes you uncomfortable don't worry about it, but I think I may get them sometimes, and was curious

[@jaynehardy3856]

Thank you ever so much.

[@jaynehardy3856]

Hi @theklespyrian, I'm really sorry that you've been struggling. Here's a blog post we wrote about panic attacks which might help; www.blurtitout.org/2016/05/25/panic-attacks-6-coping-techniques/

[@sarahmannion5867]

Jayne you are amazing setting up blurt and putting your own money into helping others. It's grown massively and it has helped me so much! I am doing a foundation degree in mental health practice as I want to help others who suffer like I do! I still struggle so it's going to be extremely difficult to do, but I want to do it! You are inspiring! Xx

[@bozvandam]

Thank you Jayne, just thank you.

[@jaynehardy3856]

[@fvaccarellas]

Dont be ashame Jayne, you have a lot of courage to go out a tell everybody about your illness. I suffer from it too. Good luck, I love you.

[@christineroberts9602]

What an inspiration! I would love to have the courage to get up in front of people and talk about the depression I'm going through but I wouldn't know where to start right now. Maybe one day. In the meantime this lady is amazing!!!!

[@TheFay7]

I want to hug her

[@sagesheahan6732]

Same.

[@blackwolf3803]

Oof

[@waqarahmed7319]

Every who has come to see this video I hope all of you feel better. Maybe someday we can have inner peace. I love all of you. Be patient we can get through this.

[@beccaishername82]

Jayne, this is incredibly honest and also insightful. It is so hard to name the things you feel, they are so complex sometimes, and maybe that's why we can't describe them. Thank you for your story, it is helping me to understand others that I love

[@amirmq2641]

i am a depressed person these days that im having is not going very good for me emotionally but when i see some one like this video talk about depretion and how depretion can ruin your every part of life how you have no control on it and cant do anything about it, makes me fell better and make the burden i carring feel lighter and easier so thank you

[@Amber-cq6lc]

I'm moved watching this. You've been through a lot but you've bravely used your experiences to help other people. I identified with a lot of what you said and I too am thankful for online communities where I can share my experiences of anxiety and depression and know that I'm not alone. Blurt has been a big part of that. Even your struggles and darkest times were not a waste as they have helped to create something fantastic that genuinely makes a difference. Thank you!

[@jaynehardy3856]

Thank you very much Amber, sending hugs aplenty.

[@NikkiP4444]

Thank you for your bravery and compassion! My greatest challenge is my family who see this illness as a weakness and an excuse for not doing as much as I "should". They are my siblings, my spouse, my children and some of my grandchildren. The negativity is reinforced daily. It is only because of people like you Jayne that I know that I am real and my suffering is real. Thank you all so much!

[@nicolavarty7847]

I'm so glad she made this. I'm depressed but no one believes me. Most people my age hate going to school and say "oh I'd rather die than be here" well I literally would rather be dead than go to school. I sit on my bed the night before and I cry my eyes out because I don't want to go to school and in the morning I manage to finally get out of bed 30 minutes after my alarm clock goes off. People just say I'm lazy but I'm just so depressed and suicidal I don't want to get out of bed out of fear that I'll hurt myself. In my bed I'm safe from myself.

[@preeti7277]

babe im so sorry, if you ever see this I hope the best for you

[@nanettefabros6237]

This is one of the better vids I seen about depression.

[@magadiendor]

I like you more than two minutes ago. You have the bravery to look into the eyes the monster inside of you, inside of me, and telling his name in front of everyone. Thank you.

[@trancer03]

I found anger against society to be the best remedy against depression. It is not our fault we are depressed. it is not our weakness. It is society that is at fault. people are more lonely than ever and the fault is the machine we work in. making the rich richer. while making people super selfish because they feel being selfish is needed just to survive. Say NO MORE

[@annaliversidge1060]

Such a beautiful and moving talk. So brave of you to share. The Blurt Foundation has been a wonderful support and resource. Just knowing other's out there feel like you makes you feel much less alone.

[@jaynehardy3856]

Thank you Anna. I am so pleased that we have helped you to feel supported x

[@small_fries7573]

Wish u accept Jesus Christ as your Savior so u can go to heaven after this life. God doesn't expect you to be perfect nor sinless. He just wants u to believe in Him as your Savior for your sins so u can go to heaven after this life. You are precious.

[@liz-cf2rv]

I love sleeping and eating- they are my escapes

[@slow.and.hot717]

Yeah, when I eat I feel like at least I accomplished one thing I was supposed to get done that day.

[@elaineomahony7254]

Thank you Jayne so much I am in tears. Have never heard of Blurt so can't wait to check it out. OMG at last, I am so grateful to you and will be in touch soon. Struggling all my life with this awful debilitating illness and have lost family and friends to it. Not trying to pretend all is fine anymore when inside I am screaming "Please help me", turning up for social events that I can't cope with that make me soo much worse afterwards so much so that my physical health suffers. Turning to alcohol to help me cope and paying the price afterwards. I am not going to try and fit in with all these amazing people that I love anymore, when I am well Yes of course. But no not sacrificing my mental health anymore. I am not a werido people and all of the other cruel words and comments that I have had to endure. I am in pain!!!! Granted an invisible pain but in this day and age try not to be soo judgmental. I DONT want your sympathy but maybe a little compassion. And for those who know me well and roll their eyes to heaven when I am on my soapbox trying to explain my illness I will be sharing Laura's Ted Talk with you. Laura you are amazing!!! It takes Real Guts to suffer this and you my dear Laura are an extremely brave person!!!!! God Bless YOU xxxx

[@oompaloompa3838]

I was diagnosed 8 months ago with depression and anxiety. I was 13. I turned 14 in February and am still struggling, actually worse. I have self harmed and attempted suicide. I’m not even a quarter of the way through my life yet and I already want it to end.

[@MiguelAsencio]

Really emotive talk, greeting from Colombia and thanks for sharing

[@Feetpicsyum]

Thank you this means so much to me right now.

[@briannezolmer3743]

Would love to talk to this woman personally

[@sagesheahan6732]

That makes two of us. And give her a hug! She more than earned it.

[@l_Live_In_Oregon]

"I gave up, giving up". Beautiful quote

[@HadrianJameson-be6tz]

Thank you for talking so openly about it. It's really helpful 👍🏻

[@Eidlones]

I don't get how hearing about other people having depression helps. I'm not depressed because I feel alone in my depression, I'm depressed because I feel worthless. Knowing other people feel worthless doesn't make me feel less worthless. It's like telling me other people are burning alive, and me feeling better about burning alive myself. Telling me other people can lift that dumbbell, so it means I can to. No, it means that I have the capacity to be able to, something I already know, and they were able to break out of the thing that stopped them from training. They are not me. Everyone is different. Telling me I have the capacity to do it, and showing me people that have, just makes me feel worse about myself because it reminds me of my continuous failure. That seems to be the majority of "help", out there though. Showing you that you aren't alone. That doesn't help me.

[@hid4768]

each person has his reasons that led to his depression, but in general, the absence of a purpose for which we were created, and the failure to fill the spiritual void that is inside us because we did not contact and know the Creator, our God and we don't took guidance and reassurance from Him, and instead of seeking God’s satisfaction, we seek the satisfaction of others who will not benefit us... Believe me, if you achieve all of the above, this depression will go away.

[@Januaryblue_Zzz]

I haven't been diagnosed with depression but I know I do, I don't want to tell anyone especially my mum because all she would say is no you don't and make me pray. I find it hard to connect with people and just want to sleep forever

[@stevethomas74]

Jayne, thank you so much for both this talk as well as what you did and have done with your colleagues for that campaign (I'd not heard of it before but then again, I don't really do Twitter). To be able to stand up there and speak so eloquently and honestly, especially with you having Anxiety too, just makes me feel so proud as a fellow Depression sufferer. I'll have to check out this BLURT for sure :) Take care and bless you x

[@jaynehardy3856]

Thank you so very much, Steve.

[@stevethomas74]

You're very welcome, Jayne. I have now joined BLURT Facebook group and I've checked out the site a few times already and it looks great. I've REALLY been struggling this year and the suicidal ideation has been through the roof so many times (I won't do it, especially as I look after my dad). I hope you manage to have a lovely xmas and wishing you a happy new year x

[@small_fries7573]

Wish u accept Jesus Christ as your Savior so u can go to heaven after this life. God doesn't expect you to be perfect nor sinless. He just wants u to believe in Him as your Savior for your sins so u can go to heaven after this life. You are precious.

[@small_fries7573]

@@jaynehardy3856 Wish u accept Jesus Christ as your Savior so u can go to heaven after this life. God doesn't expect you to be perfect nor sinless. He just wants u to believe in Him as your Savior for your sins so u can go to heaven after this life. You are precious.

[@coolfungracious6836]

I never thought I could experience it. Came and swooped me and I tried for a while to stand up and say I can beat this and it’s no big deal.. today I wish tommarow was my last. 😞 I’m so empty

[@user-mt7pn3jx9h]

The problem is when you don't know if you're depressed but are afraid or shy to seek help

[@dracomalfoylover3127]

I hate it when others say they're depressed because they're just a bit 'sad'. I have bipolar depression. Let me tell you, depression is so much more than just being sad. It's feeling regret and shame and disgust over yourself. It's like something is constantly missing. It feels just like that pain from a family member dying. And it feels like it'll never go away. It can fade, but it'll never truly leave. I feel so hopeless. All the time. And guilty. Guilt is the worst feeling. Guilt over myself and the fact that I can never stop feeling this way. Like it's my fault that I'm depressed.

[@SuusHengelo]

Thank you for your strenght and for this inspiring talk! I wish that one day I will be just as couregeous as you. Love, Suzanne from the Netherlands

[@user-dh1me1ll8z]

The worst part is once you've gone too far, you start to get comfortable with it, a part of you wants to stay trapped in it because you get so used to staying in bed all day, either sleeping all the time or not sleeping at all, your body gets used to not eating for days at a time or eating so much you throw up. You dont want to change, your scared of what will happen to you when you do.

[@Viky.A.V.]

This is the reason I keep sharing my depressive episodes treatment online. I don't care if some people think I'm weird, even if I help just one single person to stop being ashamed and ask for help -- that would be enough for me.

[@kazpwright]

Thank you. Very moving x

[@jaynehardy3856]

Thank you x

[@leisarileystewart6601]

Depression is NOT just feeling sad. Depression involves harrowing, uncontrollable, dark thoughts. You start to fight them, then you try to fly away, even fawn or people please. Sometimes you just freeze...and begin to bubble the self-doubt and drowning in a sense of worthlessness. I have experienced depression as well as trauma which gave me ptsd. All I know is that I am better for identifying triggers and cycles. That way, I can process growth and keep my chin up, enough at least to move forward on hard days. It is not easy, but I am prepared to do the work. Self-love has taught me to focus on the positives so that depression can not consume me. I am the master of me, not a product of a label or diagnosis.

[@tammymccarthy1204]

Thank you so much !! You are amazing

[@givergiver8640]

God bless you who are in depression

[@MS-ns4ki]

We are all fighting battles others know nothing about. Be kind. You never know how your words do impact people for life . 💜

[@Anna-vz5jl]

I’m struggling so much I am so alone I feel so alone I live with my sister and her boyfriend my sisters had it with me I work full-time I’m so tired I was crying to tonight my sister on her way out from going on her way out she said you really need help no hug no kiss that’s it I am laying in my bed right now feeling so down my whole body feels heavy I’m so tired I can’t believe my life is this lonely I can’t believe I feel so lost and alone what can I do

[@indylwth2327]

Wow. You're describing me. Thank you.

[@bellmajchrzak]

It's we who thank you, Jayne

[@melvyncox3361]

Excllent talk.l'm so with her on this.

[@Daniel-xc3ws]

thank you Jayne, you are so brave and couragous.

[@jaynehardy3856]

Thank you ever so much, Daniel.

[@sagesheahan6732]

I second this. Tis truth. 💜

[@Snackpaws]

thankies for sharing this .. i have depression an Borderline Personality Disorder, an mood swings, tho i do understand this very muchs.. huggs yea darling for standing up like this i know is hards tho, it dose helps..

[@TheJannybug]

Wonderful talk. Thank you, Jayne. I'm looking at your website. Keep up the good work. I work with The National Alliance on Mental Illness.

[@watermelon..baby12]

basically just explained me at the beginning…

[@dennisr.levesque2320]

To me, depression is just a symptom of something else. It's the sign/signal that something else needs to be addressed. Depression itself, never becomes the subject. It's that something else that needs figuring out. And that's what's usually ignored. Dealing with the symptoms is a superfluous substitute for the real issue. Humpty Dumpty still has a problem.

[@user-in7vf1iv4u]

LONG STORY AHEAD I am 15 years old . Coping with a really bad case of depression. In most of the videos, people say that getting Therapy helps in coping with depression. Come on, most of us are teens who don't know how to even talk with parents openly, and now we need to go and ask them for Therapy. Well, we all know the reaction. They'll be like "you're tryna create sympathy" Breaking you even more. Fine, talk with your friends. Really?! You think we would be suffering from depression if we ever had true friends?! I don't know about you guys, but i dont think that ANY OF US have friends to whom we can be open to. Indian Parents take depression to a WHOLE NEW LEVEL. (Again, its my opinion.) They have NO idea, about mental health. Sad to admit, but i have written a suicide note, which was in the form of a poem, which was accidentally seen by my mother. her reaction literally buried me alive. My hands are literally shaking right now. Tears welling up in my eyes. She asked, "are you tryna threaten us with suicide poems? I dont care. We dont want a child with an attitude like you." Tears welled up in my eyes that day. And she said, "your crocodile tears are not gonna do anything" ..... by the time we become independent and get THERAPY, We would have literally committed suicide. But think about in this way. Lets all stop caring about others and start being selfish. Why do we have to die for other people to be happy? Instead lets be happy and live our lives to the greatest extent. The best thing you can do right now is to prepare to move out. Start taking defense classes. Learn how to be independent. Try managing your own money if you can. Once you are 18, go live alone, get a part time job, or even better, work in the army. Instead of dying cowardly, you get to die bravely. Love you all, you guys are my brothers and sisters. You are stronger than you know it. Love yall!

[@danielmorley4667]

I wish that there was somebody to talk to

[@selynasteriska]

Great talk! ❤ thank you.

[@nnnooo2437]

I don’t know if I have depression but the signs that she mentioned is what I’m struggling right now. It drowns me to loneliness and negativities. I don’t know what path to choose. I don’t have motivation like I used to. I can pretend that I’m alright but at the end of day, I’m not. I feel helpless explaining to my family my feelings because I can’t explain it either. They just saying that I’m lazy or unmotivated in life. They are degrading me that keeps me so down. I also feel anxieties sometimes. Is this just sadness or am I also having depression right now?

[@hazelswords8573]

wish I had an understanding family all they offered was 2 weeks to get it together or leave coz I just have to get over it and stop being lazy.. get a job again and I won't have panic attacks or depression. how am I meant too get through a interviews?? maybe with the holy statute my dad gave me lol. to people who have support I envy you so much

[@LuckyxCharmi]

Hazel Swords that's exactly what I'm going through.. They don't understand.. and it makes it worse because you feel like you have nobody to reach out to if you can't even reach out to your family..

[@Bonbon12345ify]

I'm in the same position as you :(

[@foofy3406]

Hazel Swords, i know exactly what you mean. they just do not get it.

[@Angie-ci1lp]

Thank you for sharing 🙏🏽❤️🙏🏽

[@canman809]

This disease can be paralyzing and often is for me. You need someone but want to be alone at the same time. I want to live but find myself frozen with no explanation why. You become a prisoner in your own head and fearful of everything and nothing! Unable to find joy in the best things or anything in your life. 😭😭

[@rosangavarte2784]

sometimes i feel so helpless and hopeless that it makes me not to even bother about my depression which leads me to stay in emotionless

[@alanbunyan5007]

As someone who's been fortunate enough (thus far!) never to have experienced depression, I've heard and read enough about it to know that it can strike anyone at any time, and that telling sufferers to 'snap out of it', 'pull yourself together' or 'cheer up' is probably akin to finding someone lying on the ground seriously injured and then kicking them. I've also learned that - unlike the conventional view that it is some kind of prolonged feeling of "sadness" - it seems more like the loss of the ability to feel anything at all, which must surely qualify it as one of the most miserable afflictions imaginable. (Perhaps, in a strange way, chronic sadness might even be preferable, since you would at least be feeling something?) However, there is one thing which, I confess, I find difficult to comprehend, and that is why so many sufferers report feeling 'guilty' or 'ashamed' to tell people that they are depressed. It's an illness. You haven't done anything wrong, become a monster, committed any crime. Nobody feels ashamed to say they have the 'flu, or diabetes, or cancer. Why feel ashamed to say that you have depression??

[@vdecker1587]

Thank you for understand us who go through it! We feel ashamed because we have been told by others to "snap out of it" or "cheer up". We are told by others that it's a choice, an attitude. So we beat ourselves up and feel so ashamed of choosing to be depressed when we should be happy. But you are very right that it's a miserable affliction and I'd probably rather be diagnosed with cancer or other physical disease where I would still have my mind, emotions and will to battle it.

[@ryanthompson4308]

How do I explain my depression to my father? No one seems to understand.

[@jaynehardy3856]

Hi Ryan, we've got lots of resources for supporting someone with depression on our website www.blurtitout.org/category/supporting-someone-with-depression-blog/ and also some posts for those who might not already understand: www.blurtitout.org/2016/07/08/describing-depression-whove-never/ www.blurtitout.org/2015/10/30/depression-5-illustrations-which-help-aid-understanding/ www.blurtitout.org/2016/03/09/depression-10-books-aid-understanding/ I hope these help.

[@Love09Iry]

Jayne Hardy

[@Anazovko]

Have him watch a video , it will help him understand and also show him there are other people who deal with depression

[@zoemiller8198]

I’m currently going through a really tough time and this video really resonates. I regularly go to blurt for helpfully resources. And I’m thankful for communities like this. I’d love to get into working for an organisation like Blurt. But don’t know where to start? I’ve lost my job, my family are not a support and I’m struggling to keep my head above water. I need a purpose, and I believe my purpose is to use my experiences for the better and help those in similar situations.

[@jhsemoxitha3821]

Same I think normal people just don't get us I tried to tell my mom several times but all she did was ignored and make fun of me

[@plitas]

Im tired of fighting, tired of waking up, tired of being an empty shell, tired of feeling worthless, tired of being in pain all the time. Its time to let go, im tired.

[@dgriffinm]

Thank you for sharing this

[@sagesheahan6732]

HUGS, JAYNE!!!!!

[@xladysybilx]

Thank you blurt!!!

[@devorahbayer3433]

Well done, thank you.

[@jaynehardy3856]

Thank you x