When Did You Go Against Your Family?

[@Lily_of_the_Forest]

My maternal side had been poor farmers for generations. My grandpa was the first to get a scholarship and go to college. His father preferred farm life. My grandpa liked to joke so he’d say, “I was telling my father you go to college to get culture. My father then waved his hand at the cropland and replied “You’ve got all the agriCulture right here.”” My grandpa would laugh and laugh every time. He was the king of Dad Jokes. Anyway, I think he was saying he and his father butted heads a little, but he followed his dreams. He became a successful businessman and was able to help his family back home. RIP PawPaw.

[@noone-wn1se]

27.21 I have ADHD, and Autism, which may play into it slightly, which is why I'm mentioning it, and I am also 14. I can not really deal with weddings, funerals, etc. I can barely deal with school assembalys. Sitting still, shutting up, while people talk, having to make sure my facial expression co-insides with what emotions people expect and want to be able to see, especially when I don't know the people that well, or they don't know about what I have, is bassically hell. I was a bridesmaid at my mums wedding, and I don't remember it all that well. I do remember funerals for my grandparents on mums side, great grandad on dads side, and some other relation on my dads side. I don't remember grandparents, as it was a while ago, but the entire time, I was stressed out about staying still, staying quiet, how to act, what my face was like, how uncomfy I was, how if I shift, or itch that infuriating itch on my head, it could be rude. I understand that it's grieving, but I function differently to other people. I hate death, because unlike other things, I can't try to pretend it didn't happen. Even if I do push it to the back of my mind, people bring it up, and I don't know how to act! No one tells you the expectations! For the relation on my dads side, who I didn't know, I didn't have my ADHD medication on me. It was sprung on me, so I pulled an all nighter the night before, just so I could be sure I wouldn't do anything wrong! My dad is esspecially non-understanding about my ADHD and Autism. He thinks that I can just "train myself out of them", which isn't how it works. I was half passed out at that funeral. At my Great grandads funeral, I blacked out from heatstroke, and I was panicked because I felt like I was interuppting, etc. Everyone was understanding, and my dad wasn't there, so I didn't have to deal with that. (Him not coming was a whole other can of worms. He didn't tell anyone he wasn't comeing, and wasn't answering any communications, which continued for days afterward, until I was fully panicked, and called HIS dad to check on him, incase he was DEAD.) But I really don't know how I'll deal with anymore, esspecially when I'm older.

[@MrGksarathy]

Definitely sympathetic as someone in a similar situation, though not nearly as severe. It's always been a challenge to reproduce expressions on command, though I think medication has helped me a bit, and even 2 months after the death of a close family friend, I struggle with the fact that I'm not grieving the expected way except when confronted with reminders of her death.

[@IAmTheGreatPotato]

Related to the tattoo story, it is not ok that that artist signed their name ON HIS BODY. I am an artist, and I’ve been doing commission work for a few months now. I almost never sign my handle on any work that I do for commissions, I just ask for recognition for my work. That artist was very much out of line. The best rule of thumb is to simply ask before you sign work that someone is paying you to make.

[@twichmcvey6065]

The first one is just turning the "miracle baby" into a brat. Selfish and spoiled. So sick of people thinking their kids and life is the main story in life.

[@DespairDoctor]

I heard the story about the pregnant lady from the pregnant lady's perspective, but hearing it from the cop is great.

[@rosemarie1817]

Here's mine: I decided to never have kids. I'm saving up to be sterilized so that I can avoid it at all costs, my grandpa hated this and tried to tell me that his dream for me was to get married to a rich farmer and have 5-7+ kids with him. He even tried to introduce me to the grandson of one of his close (and the richest) farmer friends to get me interested in him (the grandson). He did this multiple times, with multiple different kids and grandkids of farmers and his richer friends.

[@Enigma_in_the_void]

You should get married for like half a year then run off with half his shit 😂 ...only joking

[@Hdjfijc]

@@Enigma_in_the_voidor ARE you

[@kalystaleona]

The wife's friend trying to get the son to take his shirt off: I would have been even more blunt, but not using insults. Something like: "do you really think it's appropriate for you to oogle my son like a sex object? He said no and that's final. If you continue to harass him then you will need to leave."

[@erinwessel2195]

It's not right to sign your work on someone's body without their permission. Furthermore the tattoo wasn't even the artist's own design so what business do they have signing it? Now the artist is trashing the business where they are employed. They should be fired.

[@Arob4343]

On the last one. It makes sense. The gf isn’t wrong to be upset. She put a TON of personal work and care into her gift. Essentially it’s like how pay to win players take the shortcut to success in video games vs grinding it out to achieve success. Op isn’t a butthole for giving the gift, but it might’ve been better to not do it at that time to steal the show

[@basicdesign1]

28:30, living in the girl's parent's house, the girl makes a scene to her fiance as *she does not trust him* and assumes that her own mother's knickers that got mixed in the washing with their clothes, are his mistress'. The dad is letting the bloke see what it's gonna be like to be married to the girl ('coz the lack of trust _will_ come out one way or/and another, phone msgs, even just a casual look, anything). So the fiances are forced to face reality: either sort it out now, on your own like grown-ups do, or desist and quit - before kids come in and suffer the consequences. Once more, what's wrong with you that you don't let people face their karma?? If they can't do that, may we be spared that they produce kids together.

[@andrewlanglois6362]

12:34 receiving a Tattoo is a form of Branding, like faltering cattle for brandishing them as owned by "This Name/Initial Here". People do not get to Own Other People.

[@crystals4092]

OMFG 😂😂😂😂

[@screamoneo]

for the tattoo one, it is NOT the artist’s design. they should NOT be putting their initials in there. they were told “hey, this is a tattoo someone else has. i want the exact same thing.” meaning they *knew* this was not their own original design. even if it is“traditional” to do so, it is NOT the exact copy that op asked for, and obviously, the original artist didnt do it, since the second one saw it as an opportunity to add their own initials

[@steph8030593]

Reminds me of that guy from Ink Master that puts the time of his birth into his tattoos

[@ethanb2224]

this guy has so much going on in his life it’s actually insane

[@safehouse432]

For the tattoo story I wonder if op could press charges or a potential law suit considering they did something without op's explicit consent and altered the original agreement. Now the artist is slandering op to others if that negatively affects op that could also be a libel suit.

[@samuelduchaine916]

yes but if the artist showed the stencil and she said it was ok then she couldnt do anything because she would have agreed to those being their

[@samuelduchaine916]

but also in this scenario the tattoo artist is in the wrong but not much you can do

[@Shlingus-eq9qx]

Обожаю ваши видео!

[@Neonsilver13]

Last story, not necessarily an A-Hole, when it comes to expensive gifts I personally would talk to others and make it a joint gift. So in that situation I might have talked to the GF about it, that would have preempted that situation.

[@LittleKittySilver]

Same, but would have asked her if she wanted to go splitties on the watch. I think he would have been just as happy if not more happy that the two most important people in his life worked together to get him his dream watch.

[@nataliereeves3594]

When i went to a wedding as a kid i was so bored that i fell asleep on a pile of coats so i can understand not having kids at weddings because they will be bored and ither misbehave or just fall asleep like i did.

[@richardlanier2113]

My ex wife had "male friends" too, so did a couple other exes. They all cheated with their "male friends."

[@crystals4092]

WOW, my almost 2 year old daughter doesn't remember my sister's wedding almost 30 years ago 😂😂😂

[@basicdesign1]

23:30 "_I have a problem when ppl bring looks into stuff, it sends a bad msg_": too right, so what's that idiot woman doing, heh? She's done it, she gets the mirror of her action, what's wrong with you that you refuse karma?? edit to add: love your response about the pets-replace-children wedding. If only you could be more mature about telling the real truth to bullies, i.e. that they are ugly.

[@andrewlanglois6362]

52:04 🤦🏻🤦🏻‍♂🤦🏻 She has the Skill of Crochet Knitting. There is no Outshine vs Skill Traits... She need not worry about that, when it comes to an antique watch, though he need not act on about excitement in front of her. May be the Reason why she feels outshined.

[@codm22712]

Good video so far haven’t finished it yet

[@pennywisenibbles4949]

I remember stuff from when I was 2 guess I’m nobody

[@crystals4092]

I remember near there, but not a great lot of things. I was about 2.5 years old. My children do not, however. One granddaughter does, and the other one doesn't... so I'll agree that it's subjective 😂

[@TheSolidMidgetOfficial]

Karen: Excuse me. Do you know who I am? Me: Are you asking me if I know who you are? Karen: Yes, do you know? Me: Well if you don't know, how am I suppose to know? Karen: Huh? Me: Oh, I get it now. You have the brain damage and you're here with your carer.

[@Arob4343]

The tattoo artist grossly overstepped. And it wasn’t even their design. And permanently on someone’s body….awful

[@SilverMoon-qx5hn]

NEVER put your initials or "tag" into a tattoo. The person who has it can tell people who and where they got it not to mention we live in a day where you can take pictures. My artist does an online portfolio. That is low and underhanded what the artist did. It's f-ed.

[@weewee1820]

I really wish you did more /askreddit because in my opinion they are a whole lot better in general, than people just asking a question. But aside from that, your doing amazing work!

[@IAmTheGreatPotato]

I agree with you, I’d love more r/askreddit videos, it allows us to share our stories more :)

[@Ai-kyu]

first story: totally beside the point of it all, i dont see why she couldnt have had both. ive been to family weddings with 2 or 3 flower girls. however, im also on a side where i think the main components should remain in the immediate marrying family, like the flower girl, ring bearer, etc, unless otherwise needed, if the couple so desires. if they want to incorperate their other family, then cool! but no is an answer.

[@Ai-kyu]

tattoo story: the artist was in the wrong. if it was indeed their own creation, i feel they have a right to put the signature in there, and then maybe also just ask if its okay. id be okay as long as the signature flows with the work. but it wasnt their own creation. it was something someone brought in to get done. something very specific and sentimental.

[@crystals4092]

Not necessary to have both 😢😢... the fact that she doesn't want to have both is the important part of the reality of her story. OP is not required to make her niece one of her flower girls unless she wants to. A fact you're apparently missing. 😢

[@Democracy-officer-276]

Kafe That story and yeah I do understand for calling her ugly what’s the capital of the line but yet again it’s technically insist considering that a the OP son is the byproduct of their grandma’s which is the wife of know which is the mum of wife is incest if a word to go romantical it would’ve been counted as that so no it’s not alright

[@basicdesign1]

23:16 what dyou say/do to an adult man that repeatedly tells your 19yo daughter to show herself in a bikini. Your "stop it or leave, it's not ok" is good for youngsters who need to be told where boundaries are. It's not enough for adults who are supposed to know. You can't cure entitled idiots without them being made to cry: they have gone beyond reasoning, else they wouldn't be bullies. You may not like it but that's a fact. Plus, stop acting like a blind bat and look behind the PC facade, yours and hers: *bullies _are_ ugly*, period. 23:23 "_I get it that you're trying to defuse the situation with a joke, you're frustrated_": this is a string of lies straight out of PC and so wrong: 1) it's not intended as a joke at all, 2) frustration is not the motivation for telling the truth, 3) dad is not trying to defuse anything whatsoever: he's doing his job as a dad _and_ as a decent person by stopping bullying for the present AND for the future, ensuring she won't do it to anyone else ever again. Good person, thanks to that dad. One thing is quite certain: if dad had tried to make her understand that she was bullying, she wouldn't have taken that in - and therefore she'd have tried (and very possibly succeded, seeing the wife's reaction) to make dad look like an a-hole. So if he's got to end end looking like one anyway, might as well be efficient.

[@steph8030593]

For the first story she could have very easily incorporated her niece into the whole flower girl role by having her stepdaughter pull the niece in a wagon and had both of them tossing petals

[@kadofireee]

😊

[@basicdesign1]

10:40, tatooist _reproducing_ a picture - and a 3-generations-significant one at that. Why talk about creators' right to sign their work? This is no creator, just a mere copier so absolutely no right to sign said tatoo. Period.

[@sarahmew5126]

YTA for the last story.

[@diamondstar23]

HOW?! THEY JUST GAVE A GIFT

[@D13G0D13]

Not having kids at the wedding is ok if thats your desicion...but dont go around saying they break things and then say you gonna have your pets...

[@galacticalove]

The difference imo is one can't truely ever comprehend the value of items despite having the ability to be taught right & wrong, while the latter can be taught and requested to take care. Pets are stressful, but some people have more tolerance for their mannerisms the same that some have towards children. It still remains the host decision in the end so I can't say I agree much personally.

[@alexandramusilova8148]

One thing that never stops annoying me is Americans calling every harmless tradition they don't understand some kind of -ist or -phobic. Just shut up. It's a harmless wedding tradition that recognizes the father's part of raising his daughter because the mother historically did most of the other preparations. It's a way for the dad to be included in his child's big moment. And tbh, not wanting kids there is a bit weird but overall okay. What isn't okay is how hostile op was about it. Her "friend" is a mother of three who can't make the wedding if she can't have her kids there? Kick her out! Another friend says they can't make it without kids? Threaten to have them removed by security! Yet another friend politely asks if his daughter can be involved? Threaten him to never speak of it again! This is less of a "we are childfree" and more "we hate children and will go out of our way to be hostile to anyone who chooses to be different from us and have them!"

[@mystoxxiide9043]

"not wanting kids is a bit weird" it's not actually :) i don't know if there have been some huge studies but i believe statistics are pointing towards more and more towards younger generations of women choosing or planning to be child free

[@jessegullick]

43:09 Mainly fact plainly states he has no respect for Islam or Islamic beliefs.

[@Neonsilver13]

nothing about Islam is mentioned, he focuses on personaly freedom, specifically of women, something that is a basic human right in pretty much any civilized country

[@jessegullick]

@@Neonsilver13 are you suggesting the beliefs of Islam are incompatible with civilized society?

[@bork116]

All he said is he has a problem with people being treated as property is bad what is wrong with that?