White Woman Explains Why As An Anti-Racist Ally She Refuses To Say Any Word That Starts With 'N'

Kelsey Porter used to think that, as a white woman, her acceptance of other races absolved her of racism, until she realized that not being racist wasn’t enough. Today, Porter considers herself an anti-racist ally and is sharing her journey to unlearn her own inherent racism by refusing to ever say a word that starts with the letter 'N'.
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[@Xeqcme]

The world nee....requires more people like this.

[@andersaskjrgensen5468]

watch it there

[@dikydankedude]

I require more cheesy chips

[@Thomas-yl8lb]

@@dikydankedude 😂

[@navb0tactual]

*_THAT'S RACIST YOU CAN'T SAY THAT!!!😱😱😱_*

[@BowlofColdSoup]

YOU SAID A combination of letter WITH THE LETTER M BURN THIS RACIST (saying combination of letters, combination of letters is also racist because a W looks like an upside down M, and an M is just 2 Ns put together)

[@mrmockturtle4027]

If we can't say words that start with the letter N, then Rick Astley has no choice but to give us up, let us down, run around and desert us.

[@mrmockturtle4027]

He would also make us cry, say goodbye, tell a lie and hurt us.

[@DoorBelle7]

This is criminally an underrated comment! This is probably the funniest thing I’ve seen all day:)

[@GoodRanchers.]

Lmfao

[@johns9652]

Oh that's good.

[@arkanon8661]

rick astley's only choice is to*

[@vlogbrothers]

Good thing the letter N doesn't start with N...

[@thelightningwave]

Damn, first comment from the Vlog brothers on the onion KZbin channel and you post this.

[@tyruskarmesin5418]

“en”

[@leospaceman2976]

@@thelightningwavethose dudes have sucked for a while now

[@johnchessant3012]

hi John/Hank (my guess would be Hank btw), good to see you here!

[@davidtoda1751]

The letter "N" starts with the letter "e".

[@CreeperG0d]

"Are you racist?" "N... Absolutely n... I ain't."

[@demi172]

but "ain't" is just an abbreviation of "am n-o-t", oh n... oh god!!

[@thejoker-wu1sp]

Lol

[@destroyerofnothing]

@@demi172TO THE GULAG

[@CarbonatedCondensation]

@@demi172oh lordie, what are we going to do

[@rampatel2619]

It sounds even worse when you omit the No lol

[@blockman3508]

The condescension, the accidental racism, the awkward handshake... this is too perfect

[@Sheppo42]

Except it's not accidental.

[@empyrean-jamelgreaves8034]

And it's not fuckin real😂😂😂

[@asain3586]

​@@empyrean-jamelgreaves8034 Poor kid lives under a rock his whole life

[@SythricDeadith]

@empyrean-jamelgreaves8034 This instance isn't real, but there are some liberal weirdos that have nearly the exact same thought process as this skit

[@blueberryoatmeal4009]

​@@empyrean-jamelgreaves8034... We know. Are you dumb or something?

[@miamitten1123]

_“Well, maybe YOU should speak English.”_ I'm overwhelmed by the irony 🤣

[@oompa1274]

I still dont get it🥴

[@dvoemi]

​@@oompa1274cause its the "dumb american only my language exists" stereotype. like those who ask "why doesnt every country speak english" 😂

[@MFMegaZeroX7]

@@oompa1274 Latino people getting told to stop speaking spanish between themselves by old racist people is kind of a thing (also, with basically any other language things).

[@XhoowieX]

​@@oompa1274a good example is when South Americans use words in Portuguese or Spanish that happen to sound like racial slurs in English, and then supposedly progressive people (usually Americans but sometimes British) essentially tell them that their own language should be censored based on what it sounds like in English. Ridiculously xenophobic with no sense of self-awareness m

[@Miss_New_Booty]

You see it with Crayola crayon colors, since they're written in English, Spanish, and French. "Negro" is Spanish for the color black, but people who only understand English will see negro on a black crayon and be shocked by the "racist" things being written on children's crayons At least their heart is in the right place? I don't know, it's funny though

[@spleen866]

She's gonna be in real trouble when she finds out what the letter Z looks like sideways.

[@MrAlexOrex]

Or not sideways. It's quite a symbol of russian pro-war activity with Ukraine.

[@BlazingnitroYT]

it's also just a letter... just a letter@@MrAlexOrex

[@martinnilsen3362]

How many words starts with Z? “Oh shit can’t say zebra anymore”

[@michaelmitchel3471]

@@martinnilsen3362 ziggurat

[@spleen866]

@@martinnilsen3362 Zesty

[@alien_cult]

Was really hoping her name would be Nicole or something w/ an N lol

[@qdlaty23]

Kayeleyegh

[@akoalabear239]

“My na- identifier is Icole now. Its not pretty but thats just the cross I bare.”

[@itsgaylebitxh]

"Maybe you should just speak English" Perfect. Nailed it

[@CoryTheNorm]

how dare you say an N word 😠

[@jimmym3352]

Perhaps in place of "-ailed it", you could say pegged it. I would be less offended that way. Thanks.

[@e2b265]

@@jimmym3352Yes. Less of this “-ail” talk, please start talking about pegging instead!

[@dittilio]

​@@jimmym3352 Excuse me but as an ally of ALL minorities and oppressed groups (past present and future), there is a such a strong undertone of aggression with the term "pegged". Please use "joined by inanimate carbon based structures". Also, understand that doing so may still lead to future exile or imprisonment as understanding of allied languages develops.

[@Skoden710]

@@jimmym3352 i will never use the letter n again, my cousins name is now dick, and aunt is now fancy wow so good, maybe one day we can be silent and never speak again 😁

[@error-try-again-later]

"I was racist...and I'm sorry" "It isn't easy being an ally" The actress got that particular brand of annoying down _perfectly_ omg 💀💀💀

[@theflyingspaget]

"Maybe you should speak English" 💀

[@burneraccount4755]

There was nothing remotely annoying about any of that please keep your passive racism in check .

[@devinnix9071]

​@@burneraccount4755 I agree, as someone who says words that start with N so often I think I'm finally realizing my wrongs, I vow to be a better person right now. I will NEVER say something that starts with N again

[@howareyoumoreofaclownthanme]

​@@burneraccount4755 I'm sure you genuinely mean that and stand up for what you're saying, burneraccount4755. Such a brave and inspiring name, that.

[@MR-backup]

" nnn, nnnn "

[@ADudeNamedLucky]

Love that she’s not even anti-racism, just an ally to people who are anti-racist.

[@tree4318]

I'm offended by the N word in your comment

[@ArcusDraco]

... you know this is a joke, right? You just used the same condescending tone of voice in your comment as this joke video. This video is about you

[@Underr4t3d]

@@tree4318 I refuse to be offended by the N-O-T word.

[@baintreachas]

@@ArcusDraco pretty obviously meant that “I love how she [the fictional character] is [written as]…” At least, I assume so. You see similar comments on explicitly fictional stuff all the time

[@shanicel4757]

@@ArcusDracoi can’t tell if ur being fr

[@adelaideemiliem2772]

I’m going to stop saying my brother’s name that starts with N. Luckily ‘Ick’ is a fitting replacement.

[@noahsdragonfruit]

HAHAGHSGSGHA

[@Patheticmoonheart]

😭

[@cracklingsoda]

You could try 'd-ick' for a change

[@cyin974]

Just replace the letter N with D, it works well!

[@AntoniOrszykowski]

😅😅😅

[@jurgengeyer5540]

I love that the epilogue (2:36) has completely avoided any words starting with both "N" and the also problematic "M". Thank you, Onion editors, for being true allies.

[@quinndepatten4442]

N-o-w that you m-e-n-t-i-o-n it, W is suspiciously close to the letter M and N. I dunno if I can trust someone who uses that letter around my friends and family.

[@PessoinhaAleatoria]

no

[@dragonshadow4145]

I think they did that in the description too

[@TheDrCN]

When it said "She has since issued an apology, promising to avoid ever using a word" I thought it was going to end on that. I was a little disappointed when the last line faded in, I think the joke works better if it just ends there.

[@Pete...NoNotThatOne]

@@quinndepatten4442To make sure you don’t slip up, it’s probably a better tactic to avoid using any words with the letter N or M in them.

[@IcyAuron]

"Maybe you should speak English" pushed this over the edge. Hilarious!

[@kgpz100]

I couldn't believe she said that. The Onion has still got it

[@onewayraildex4827]

It’s basically what people are saying when they use latinx

[@DuncanUdaho67]

What a perfect punchline omg.

[@ronaldchong]

crap, i just gave the 666th thumbs up.

[@thecurseddinkleberg4086]

The part where she said "I think if a black person had been there, they would have shaken my hand and thanked me" was so accurate.

[@BlightCaster]

"If a black person had been there... but we don't let those into our restaurants"

[@bm_peep48]

@@BlightCaster💀💀

[@zTeaTheCoffee]

it's the double-whammy of expecting praise for doing something that, in reality, was just obnoxious, but even in her mind would be the bare minimum, and also clearly never interacting with black people in real life. wild stuff and so on point

[@GDAWG.]

What a lot of absolute baloney! 🤦‍♂️ if a black person was there she’d have been told to mind her own damn business and stop interfering with something thats got zero to do with her! The so called do-gooders these days are hilarious!

[@ElJosher]

@@BlightCasterlol

[@Larch3]

I love the idea that a white person saw this and thought they were serious, and now refuses to say any words that start with the letter n

[@OhItsFraz]

the fact there hasnt been restores my faith in humanity a bit

[@reedbowers1887]

Oh I'm sure theres someone out there

[@maximiliandort3489]

Brilliant. She's got that infuriatingly condenscending facial expression of "i-understand-your-struggles-much-better-than-you-do-youself-and-i'm-so-sorry" down perfectly.

[@_ArsNova]

Have always despised this notion of white people being "offended" on our behalf. If people actually used the "n word" instead of speaking through euphemisms it would take all its power and all the tension built up around it. Voldemort effect.

[@crashh-course]

"i know it's hard. i know everything. you are offended and hurt. no, shh. close your mouth. im taking accountability for the years i spent being racist."

[@circleinforthecube5170]

@@crashh-course people refuse to accept they understand problems less than the people that face them and can never understand on the same level, and if other people talk over the actual group too long we end up with shit like autism speaks and neoliberals

[@error-try-again-later]

It's the look of forced, self-satisfied pity lmao

[@maximiliandort3489]

@@crashh-course that, plus "please acknowledge how much i care; before i accuse you of being indifferent."

[@andybrice2711]

I think it's vitally important that we all do this. And demand others do the same. Without stopping to ask black people their opinion. That's true anti-racism.

[@shadowsoulless6227]

No

[@LeastNationalistPole]

​@@shadowsoulless6227 yes. Also, stop using "n o" since it had "N" in it.

[@ESTalesTyrone]

@@shadowsoulless6227did you just say the n word?

[@ESTalesTyrone]

I think as white people we have a little better idea of what black people want then they do themselves

[@_ArsNova]

Have always despised this notion of white people being "offended" on our behalf. If people actually used the "n word" instead of speaking through euphemisms it would take all its power and all the tension built up around it. Voldemort effect.

[@kristyanne719]

Hell I refuse to even say the word "vinegar"

[@bradenbash5916]

I just take out the "vi" at the beginning to avoid confusion.

[@JackDD]

Fish and chip shop: "Salt and vinegar?" Me: (Breathes angrily) "SALT! AND! VI-PERSON-OF-COLOR!"

[@lali5416]

@@JackDD So you're saying you want to buy a person of color huh? Wow, I can't believe you'd say that... in 2024!!!! Outrageous.

[@carpballet]

Renege

[@CornflowerBlue10]

​@@JackDDsalt and viAfrcanAmerican

[@ZenShimada-d1h]

"How old is your daughter?" "Five plus four" edit: i appreciate the likes guys tysm

[@CreeperG0d]

Six, but inversed.

[@Phantom86d]

Deny in German?

[@chuckinhouston9952]

I doubt that she is that good at arithmetic.

[@igorlopes7589]

​@@chuckinhouston9952 After all math is racist

[@ZenShimada-d1h]

@@chuckinhouston9952 fair enough

[@nathanieldrew]

The title alone absolutely had me rolling.

[@teeemm9456]

Cheesey chips for the win!

[@SeniorBactive]

dang i’m subbed

[@San-lh8us]

@@SeniorBactivei thought they lost the opportunity to end the video with her saying "so that's all i wanted to talk here, see y'all niggas"

[@aidenbradfield1129]

Big fan!

[@ProPandaPlays]

right this shi is hilarious so funny when b**ches cry over the word N**(({)ger LOL its just a word christ

[@yolandaponkers1581]

The part where she confirmed she never asked a Black person what THEY needed in her activism is so spot on 😂

[@paeden5431]

you used two N words, how dare you

[@jorgejorge8878]

Shame on you... SHAME on you! as @paeden5431, you dared to used two Ns in a single sentence!

[@smitty1647]

if the black person says "nothing, i'm good" then she might have to develop an actual personality, not just be a cause with a woman's name

[@TheCharleseye]

@@paeden5431 Did you just assume their race?!

[@lonk8010]

“She said that since Spanish is her first language she should be allowed to say N-A-C-H-O” And so I said, “Well, maybe YOU should speak English.” This was the best part of the video hands down imo I’m dying 😂

[@miamitten1123]

Many people here missed that gem🤣

[@JetpackLiamG]

This was too funny 🤣

[@oompa1274]

I still dont get it🥴

[@adanascencio3924]

OMG I died

[@vlnxd]

​@@oompa1274 It's satire. You can't force someone to not speak the language they speak or erase a part of their culture just for your own ideals (and it's racist/xenophobic on it's own)

[@cactusfox3608]

i was so confused and then saw it was the onion, thank god i'm just dumb

[@lildavie223]

How did you not get it was satire at the beginning 😂😂😂😂 God society is COOKED

[@cactusfox3608]

@@lildavie223 idk if society is cooked but i'm SCREWED 💀

[@Zinozad]

And then you see things even dumber than this in reality, and think "TheOnion is really pushing it far", and realise it's real.

[@chachawawa3722]

Her noble notions naturally nurture numerous noteworthy narratives, navigating towards newfound noble niches as she nurtures her nascent and nonstop aspirations.

[@bubzilla6137]

No you didn't... 😂🤣

[@CarcinogenSDA]

that's a lot of n-words death penalty

[@shadowsoulless6227]

Hold on hold on They might be black

[@martineldritch]

Ot cool man, ot cool !

[@bubzilla6137]

@@shadowsoulless6227 Good point... Let's hope! 🤞

[@FH-rp5or]

As a person who isn't black who knew a guy with a black friend at primary school, i applaud you. we could use more folks like you.

[@tegathemenace]

This is rubbish. We the black folk don't need this special pandering

[@aikotitilai3820]

They're being sarcastic​@@tegathemenace

[@shoulderpyro]

someone ate the onion

[@Xenon-h9z]

hey, don't knock onion-eating. @@shoulderpyro

[@maxivillafane4273]

Hey! Don't say "N-eed"!@@tegathemenace

[@MCSorry]

I have been racist my whole life, but seeing this has inspired me to do better. Thank you, Kelsey, for showing me there's always hope for a better tomorrow.

[@king_kunta_0]

you used the letter "m" in "m y", "m e", and another "m e", racist fuck.

[@tomokolovecraft3792]

How dare you use three, THREE! Words starting with the letter 'M,' which we all know looks like two 'N's pushed together.

[@MCSorry]

@@tomokolovecraft3792 To quote a simpson porn comic: old habits die hard.

[@tomokolovecraft3792]

@@MCSorry I'll get you off this time.

[@Bisexualconfusion]

​@@tomokolovecraft3792you're one to talk! How dare _you_ use the three, THREE! -W- ords that start -w- ith the letter 'W'. It is known that a 'W' is just an upside down 'M'! Very shameful of you

[@larrydotson2625]

This is disturbingly close to reality

[@livvlife]

Literally not at all. This is mocking fake allies, not people who are genuinely respectful and just avoid slurs.

[@Zinozad]

@@livvlife Uh... yeah, that's what he meant. It's disturbingly close to what fake allies sound like. I think it's more than disturbingly close, I think it's dead to rights reality. If you told me this wasn't satire, I would 100% trust you.

[@juliay4874]

@@livvlife you saying that and then describing exactly what he said

[@ProPandaPlays]

right this shi is hilarious so funny when b**ches cry over the word N**(({)ger LOL its just a word christ

[@insaneyogurt4993]

@@livvlifeI myself am respectful and avoid them. Avoid, them, in front of black people. I don’t actually care- I just want to virtue signal

[@alexanderbowlby4568]

Imagine using words I’m the only true Ally. I’m going to stop speaking/typing/writing and will only be using interpretive dance to communicate from here on out. This is my last message to humanity. Never be silent.

[@Squid728]

Hey mate, how is it going

[@GLUBSCHI]

@@Squid728 . , !

[@alexanderbowlby4568]

🕺🏿

[@Squid728]

@@alexanderbowlby4568 thanks for the update

[@ChadBoss-qr4hl]

Um, if you're white that would be cultural appropriation... because White people can't dance. Better stick to Jazz hands.

[@kfcbrazil7284]

I refuse to say words that have the letter that is right before O, this lady should be better.

[@ashishnmbr]

Impressive display of vocabulary my frie-.. my acquainta-.. my buddy

[@CathrineMacNiel]

@@ashishnmbr you fail to stop yourself in time to avoid the a-word. Despicable.

[@reidflemingworldstoughestm1394]

What if they have the letter right after M?

[@Iosaiv]

Do better, senator!😂

[@octopus_72]

this is nasal consonant discrimination! we should freely be able to use words which begin with the bilabial nasal and the alveolar nasal!

[@lukemini9021]

the unironic racism at 1:59 telling their friend to speak english sells this so good

[@tonybloomfield5635]

I don't think it was racist she said her friend -was- -not- wasn't Black, but Hispanic so surely that's ok.

[@MISSMADISONMEDIA]

@@tonybloomfield5635 Google what racism is

[@ericmichel3857]

How is that racist? Intolerant yes but it has absolutely nothing to do with racism. Anyone that moves to any country and refuses to learn the local language is a narcissistic ahole and has no business living in that country. It is not racist to expect people to integrate into the society they choose to move too. However, if they are new or just visiting that is different, but I know people that have been living and working here for decades and refuse to learn or speak english and that is unacceptable.

[@ysanket234]

it was ironic

[@Seven-Seas-of-Baba-O-Riley]

"Enigma" "You're on thin FUCKING ice!"

[@nolo2gogo]

She’s such a brave actress lmfao 😭

[@scarlet__eye9489]

Stunning

[@PessoinhaAleatoria]

No, she is stupid.

[@Pete...NoNotThatOne]

I feel her struggle…

[@DreadedWalrus]

@nolo2gogo Change your username 😡

[@nolo2gogo]

@@DreadedWalrus why

[@random_dragon]

Her line delivery when she said "cheesey chips" will forever be stuck in my mind

[@CrizzyEyes]

That was a weird moment for me because I remember calling nachos "chips and cheese" when I was a little kid.

[@alvallac2171]

*cheesy

[@skyboundzoo]

saame lol

[@lolicon453]

I would just call them Machos, hard M

[@Xapheus]

@@lolicon453 You shouldn't say that. As the end of the video says, that letter "M" is also problematic because it looks like two "N's" smooshed together.

[@JR-Mystic]

But her written apology used the word "using", which starts with an upside-down 'n'!

[@sebastianwittmeier1274]

Does reverse racism exist? Food for thought.

[@asackboyplush6508]

That's inverted racism

[@DaniStenko]

I hate it that she generally appropriates the Latin alphabet - which as we all know comes from Latin America, like the name suggests; therefore, she's not only culturally appropriating something, but she's being racist to the LatinaX minorities.

[@NatiiixLP]

@@DaniStenko I've been on the Internet long enough, I can't even be 100% sure if you're being sarcastic about Latin originating from Latin American.

[@MilkyMoomins]

I turned away to drink some water. About to swallow I hear”well maybe you should start speaking English”😂 I was this 🤏 close to choking 🤣🤣🤣

[@DanielaBodoh]

N-O-T-E to self: Don’t drink water while watching The Onion 😂

[@MarwanHadidi]

​@@DanielaBodohNote NNNNNote? Find a different word you racist 😂

[@Novenis]

Never seen the hand emoji being used in this setting, but it makes perfect sense

[@N3VLYNNN]

As a black woman, I have to say this skit is genius and extremely accurate to the level of language policing and mutation that is going on right now.

[@crypticshadows]

don’t say the N word! Instead of n-o-w, say “that is going on currently!”

[@petitio_principii]

@@crypticshadows it's their letter to use, you lack the right to demand from them to do otherwise.

[@mtb416]

The left loves policing language.

[@deeky1239]

Do you find it weird how white women give up their V for free as "reperations" to black men?

[@lolasdm6959]

"Hello I am from Niger" "HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT WORD."

[@Vancev99x]

Can't tell you how many classmates i punched out for not saying cheesy chips in my presence.

[@theflyingspaget]

"not"

[@lehighguy]

I would say they "refused" to say cheesy chips.

[@rpm2dayg648]

True ally.

[@tecc-ns462]

@@lehighguyThe issue there is that “not saying it” doesn’t require any action, but “refusing to say it” requires active participation.

[@RoseMari888]

how dare you say the letter “/\/\” it’s communism it’s OUR.

[@aboredguywithaninternetcon4663]

The audacity of Kelsey's friend for saying N-a-c-h-o-s instead of cheesy chips. Honestly, Kelsey is better off without someone like that in her life.

[@p39483]

knachos

[@DemonicAdj]

I just skip the letter and call them 'achos

[@roberto4898]

Please, talk English

[@BirchTreeReborn]

@DemonicAdj Gesundheit!

[@m-a-t-t6869]

You know someone pitched spelling out the actual n-word when they were writing this one

[@thhndy]

“don’t be racist” “maybe just speak english” perfection

[@880-4]

Love it. Her Spanish friend telling her that nachos isn’t a problem, then her telling that friend to speak English? It’s the irony that’s so subtle yet prominent that gets me every time.

[@Argumemnon]

They're called cheesy chips.

[@whitedragoness23]

That was hilarious! She was being inclusive yet being a bitch to her friend and insensitive lol. That is so true of those kind of people

[@Lane_Brian_Lane]

'Subtle' "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

[@cleverman383]

how do you say black in spanish?

[@majorgnu]

Subtle? That was about as subtle as a slap to the face.

[@uplink-on-yt]

Her birth name was Nicole, but she changed it to Kelsey to show her support. She'll never forgive her parents for calling her that. They no longer speak.

[@crypticshadows]

“n-o” is offensive! remember instead say, “they have stopped their contact” 😊

[@_shadiness]

As an anti-racism campaign supporter, I remained shocked by the blatant employment of some expressions beginning in the letter u, representing an inverted n, the letter h, reminiscent to a drawn-out n, the letter z, certainly appearing to be a sideways n, and the letter w, that at first looks like an inverted m, and results in two n's pushed together. I sincerely admire the efforts and desire to atone for past sins, and I get how difficult it is to be an ally, but she is still a long way from being fully embraced into our community. That being said, I long for every black person reading this a wo- a very blessed day.

[@ayomichanisapalestinesuppo8729]

Understand, understand, understand, you’re not a true member of the community either hahahahaha

[@de-zo6ex]

I love the care to avoid writing words with those first letters for the joke, lol

[@gammaanteria]

I am actually impressed with how long her monologue could go without using any words beginning with ‘N’

[@teeemm9456]

Actually really easy with AI n03, I mean these days.

[@Faroshkas]

It's scripted

[@toddpinkstonisgod]

I’m doing a similar thing. The words “bigger”, “vigor” and “rigor” are going right out of my vocabulary. I just told my black friend and he high-fived me.

[@makarabaduk1754]

You figure this as the final step in defeating racism?

[@meganegan5992]

I do genuinely avoid typing out bigger on my phone. Thumbs are too massive to risk a typo like that with b & n so close to each other

[@azophi]

@@meganegan5992your autocorrect looking sus 🤨🤨🤨

[@toddpinkstonisgod]

@@meganegan5992 oh wow 😂

[@erniebuchinski3614]

Fair enough. However, if you're going to play like that, you're going to have to give up the word "trigger" as well. Are you really ready to make that commitment? 🙃

[@MyANTHEMS]

As a black man and a born ally, I approve this message

[@mamamia5668]

nice profile pic bro

[@quokka_yt]

@@mamamia5668 You must stop to say that first word, especially close to a -black- of color man! What if he was hurt by it, therefore as a result needed a white chevalier like me to protect him due to their type being so helpless? You should stop to utilize the 14th letter of our alphabet at all costs.

[@Panicagq2]

Hey now, that's an M-word... 😮

[@nativeafroeurasian]

​@@quokka_yt[]ust?, []an? Remember, []ords starting []ith doubble [] are also bad (video []in. 2:35) []eeded? And I think the 180°rotated dubble [] is just as bad. Use numbers from []ow on. How horrible you all are to the helpless []on-light community

[@markstriker925]

​@@mamamia5668 nice? Don't you mean good profile pic

[@lil_stiiizy574]

She seems like a nice.... I mean, good person.

[@WitchKing-Of-Angmar]

How....dare you.

[@Lìnne1196]

That’s so,,,,what did you just say

[@johnrockyryan]

NO NO YOU DID NOT JUST USE THAT WORD!!

[@alexisericson241]

I love how she'd completely able to use the word 'know' but not 'no'

[@brandonreid7528]

yep perfectly tuned Orwellian see the eyes. those belong to the party.

[@erincarson8998]

There is a rape joke in there. Thanks for the chuckle.

[@jofx4051]

So she should start to avoid anything that makes silent letter into n or jokingly say knachos instead 😂

[@ayoungethan]

Just because the K is silent doesn't mean it's not there. K's deserve a voice too. They have been marginalized by the trailing N for too long.

[@RustedBuddy5192]

@@ayoungethan I can knot believe someone else knoticed. I knever thought I'd meet a like minded ally.

[@skeetrix5577]

Please lord, Protect this woman at all costs!! She is the last bastion of hope for positive race relations, Since the rest of us white people are just simply too racist to stop using the letter "N". Let the black folks know there's at least one of us that isn't racist and because of that they shouldn't be racist towards us

[@civilizedmonkey1795]

You also didn't use any words that start with "n" in your comment. You have passed the test. You get a pass on using THE n word

[@LordJapos]

K-n-o-w sounds like a word that starts with n. DO BETTER!

[@AhsimNreiziev]

@@civilizedmonkey1795 Of course, only words that start with 'n' are Racist. So logically, that means that it is totally okay for us White People to go back to saying words like 'Darkie', right? Right? _[OOC/Serious: I felt icky just writing down that word.]_

[@M_SC]

😂

[@_ArsNova]

Have always despised this notion of white people being "offended" on our behalf. If people actually used the "n word" instead of speaking through euphemisms it would take all its power and all the tension built up around it. Voldemort effect.

[@RaineWilder]

We should stop using words altogether, because any letter may potentially offend anyone in any country. And ignorance is not an excuse. Let's just use the language of love without any words.

[@erniebuchinski3614]

Or, as a former colleague of mine from my days on Wall Street forty years ago liked to say, referring to a 1964 song, "I don't care what they say, I won't live in a world without love . . . or at least a woman I meet at a bar who'll pretend for the night."

[@RaineWilder]

@@erniebuchinski3614 🤣🤣🤣

[@leagueaddict8357]

Great idea, we should just start making out with complete strangers, even gays because even if you are a straight guy you shouldn't be homophobic.

[@szhzs6121]

ghwaap!

[@MysticMicrowave]

‎

[@hahayayak3620]

Cant believe some people in here don’t know this is satire

[@sardonicus76]

This, unfortunately, is the age in which we live. There are far too many people in the world who actually believe in this kind of nonsensical pretzel logic. They can’t see the humor in it because they’re too obsessed with being “on the right side of history”. Cult members never realize they’re in a cult until it’s too late.

[@Liam-c6g1t]

The insufferable “corporate activism” voice is SO spot on

[@reluctantenthusiast]

never say never

[@shottwice]

Refuse to say the word that describes a specific thing coming to fruition**

[@cheeburger7789]

As a mulatto man I am so thankful that this woman has my back. Like I’m half black so I can say words that start with N. But for the past 5 years I’ve refused to do so as it’s honestly pretty hypocritical to make light of such an offensive consonant.

[@JediNiyte]

It is so stunning and brave to see half-colonizers such as yourself stand with Kelsey. 😁

[@Snitsie]

Toeing the line here with all those M-words

[@Zafaruss]

The way u used no N in this 😭😭

[@RuruBelle2]

​@@JediNiyte "half-colonizers" made me choke on my own spit 🤣🤣

[@gemgem-hl7ii]

oops, you used an M word. M words are also unacceptable (see the end of the video).

[@ixxsarxx]

"Are you racist?" "n- uh i mean yesn't"

[@Pattyobrien3]

Did she really write that whole speech without saying a word that begins with an N? That's impressive writing.

[@yudithcaron8053]

She did have trouble with the opposite of "yes" and "always", but she handled it well. The anti-racism stayed right at the surface, like the cheapest gold plating.

[@CHlNAZI]

chatGpt could easily pull it off

[@VOT3BYMAIL]

I avoid that letter altogether; I refuse to use words that are so much as composed with it. This chick's kinda racist.

[@michellegault4122]

You also wrote your comment without using a word that starts with N. Good job :)

[@michellegault4122]

And so did I! Nice! Oh crap :( lol

[@sovietunion7643]

i know this is satire but there are genuinely people who are exactly like this IRL. my college has a whole thing supporting south americans anad immigrants but they got into the whole 'use latinx to be gender neutral' despite spanish being a gendered langauge. the closest comparision in english i can make is if someone decided we needed to remove a vowel and make it an X which just makes no sense. so the onion really nailed this type of person perfectly honestly.

[@smokey04200420]

Someone must educate Latinx people to avoid using gendered nouns and to use X words instead. Amigx, niñx, tortillx, borritx, lx bibliotecx es rojx, you get the point.

[@ripbeni6198]

@@smokey04200420😂😂😂

[@Gandhi_Physique]

I can't believe she has the gall to spell those words. What is wrong with her? What, spelling suddenly stops the words from being bad? When you type it on a keyboard, you are spelling but end up saying it when you press enter.

[@SuperSmashDolls]

She avoids the words that start with that letter, but that's just the first step. You have to completely remove it from your vocabulary. Pop the key off your keyboard if you must.

[@20a10v]

amen

[@ninjalach23]

@@20a10v *ame

[@lanceknuth5300]

Louis CK had a bit basically touching on this subject. Trigger warning: word which starts with "N". kzbin.info/www/bejne/q6Lam2BjrKx4nbs

[@AmusedKayak-fx1lu]

She is insensitive

[@EnoVarma]

This is an ingenious bit of satire. I guarantee, that somewhere on Facebook there is an actual group advocating something similar to this.

[@Meowfy]

i think it's insanely offensive that she uses words that start with the letter W, which is an upside down M, which looks like 2 letter Ns pushed together

[@crocoshark4097]

Nice. I especially liked the "They're called cheesy chips" line, the way some people decide their idea of politically correct is the official definition of a word or the official truth without any discussion.

[@Jaizbrainz]

How dare you say the N word n-I-c-e. Say “good”.

[@crocoshark4097]

@@Jaizbrainz No. Never. Not now nor in ninety nonillion nanoseconds will I nurse a notion as nonsensical as negating "nice" from my . . . nocabulary. Yeah, that's right, I just said nocabulary. In fact, ni nam nonna nart nevery nord nith nhe netter "n" nrom now non!

[@aikotitilai3820]

​@@crocoshark4097nthat nis nunreable

[@crocoshark4097]

@@aikotitilai3820 Translation: vocabulary. I am gonna start every word with the letter “n” from now on

[@oywiththepoodlesalready]

This would be 10x better if her name started with “N”

[@Game_Hero]

She changed her name to avoid offense

[@Mordikay211]

When you can't tell if it's satire or not.

[@user-xsn5ozskwg]

I appreciate Kelsey's bold stance and fighting for what she believes in. I always thought the fight for anti-racism required tackling the material and political realities of the US, but I see now this takes absolute priority. I am growing and learning.

[@wasbear]

But you continue to use words like "N-O-W", shameful

[@mindblown42069]

you clearly didnt watch the video with that foul language

[@thebagelsproductions]

We have to ban the song 19 by Paul Hardcastle. It's outrageous

[@user-xsn5ozskwg]

@@wasbear I am listening and learning 😔

[@joffles6516]

How dare you say “ N O W “ you act like you care but you are everything that’s wrong with society

[@stevenw2933]

I believe I heard her use terms that starts with "W" in this video. I find that offensive because "W" is really two "Ns' pushed together and then flipped upside down. A real ally should know better and I demand an apology.

[@ChadBoss-qr4hl]

Says the horrible racist monster hiding his use of an n-word behind a silent k! A K!! Perhaps the 3rd most problematic letter in the English alphabet!! (It's the 1st, 2nd, AND 3rd letter in the word 'K - K - K'!!)

[@dawnscript1]

Agreed! She is not a true ally..

[@petitio_principii]

the thing is, that's the first letter of the word white, so making your point is likely really secretly deceptively trying to grant whites the same kind of concern, care and attention that should be given only to NWBIPOC and LGBTIQIRZY⍼, instead of to oppressors. That's an absence of anything but thinly veiled white-privileged cultural appropriation.

[@petitio_principii]

@yt45204 double-u, that's two straightened-up Us pushed together.

[@Cam1417-TK]

@yt45204 V is 2/3 of a N!

[@bielgaucho_real]

I love that The Onion is still keeping the good journalism.

[@MumboDjango]

I'm not scrolling down looking for people that took this seriously, you are.

[@qdlaty23]

Onion never fails to expose and mock nonsense and stupidity. Awesome video, keep up the good work guys!

[@thebe_stone]

I can't believe you just said that word ending in ever. (the second word in your sentence)

[@GalakStari]

And the one ending in “onsense”

[@doug6259]

Somewhere there is a leftist taking this challenge seriously.

[@Ebh55.]

@@doug6259 What is that?

[@salam-peace5519]

@@doug6259 More likely some far-righters will take this seriously and will now spread something like "leftists now want you to stop saying words starting with N" even though no leftist ever did that. Strawmen are so common in nowadays political discussion. People take satire serious if it fits the strawman or represent extreme individuals as if they present an entire group. It would help a lot if people nowadays talked more with each other than about each other.

[@Bossman50.]

“You should just speak English” went over a lot of people’s heads lol

[@GottlikeDamon]

That's the best part. Honestly it's so funny when "social warriors" get mad at you for speaking your first language and suggest to think in English beforehand.

[@nooffencebut8175]

I love how she said ‘well maybe you should speak English’ completely backtracking on her so-called anti-racism 😂😂😂

[@mount4868]

I wonder how many people out there saw this who don't know the onion, and thought "she's right you know!"

[@kaderen8461]

They nailed it down perfectly; from the "youre not a real ally" kinda gatekeeping, to the racism that they accidentally inflict from a mobius double reacharound of supportiveness, to that strange infantilization of the group she "supports"

[@jacliveshere]

YES.

[@kaderen8461]

sorry for my americanness in the comment; *infantilisation

[@iNotAnHacker]

I love the speak English line because that makes this whole thing into the equivalent of taking endangered animals from there natural habitat and just leaving in the middle of a city, like they know what has been done to help before but not why or how.

[@roc-noK]

how dare you say those n-words!

[@alvallac2171]

*their (possessive) they're = contraction of "THEY aRE" there: for all other uses

[@SupahTrunks7]

The fact that she only knows racism as essentially “something bad that people do to black people” is so on point. Shes still racist and she’s not even doing this for the black community bc her statement about how a black person would’ve shaken her hand shows that she’s really doing this for clout

[@sovietunion7643]

@@alvallac2171 nerd: you

[@kiraoshiro9251]

​@@alvallac2171 **there there (derogatory)

[@markeastwood74]

I hope this inspires more people who think this way to stop using words.

[@j.l.parker]

^ Underrated comment.

[@CaesarRealAndOFFICIAL]

I dislike "that letter" all throughout the words that I use

[@LunaSolarys]

Unironically this is what modern Twitter is like

[@door-chan]

says unironically and proceeds to lie

[@koalasquare2145]

But how do I describe my hobbies without using words like -ecrophillia?

[@error-try-again-later]

Consider less hateful language like "corpse bonding activities."

[@jakehate]

So glad to see a true ally ✊🏻

[@WarthogDemon]

“You might lose friends.” I’m thinking in particular she lost Natalie, Nancy, Nina, Nicholas, and Ned as friends.

[@AbrahamLincoln4]

Bro literally defeated the CEO of Racism single handedly.

[@Dmitryzakharov]

Worse than losing your friends would be losing your mind.

[@tomcoop9750]

“Saying ‘lets start with the low hanging fruit’ is offensive to migrant farmers.” -A real quote from a DEI training event I attended 😂

[@lalad0]

No motherfuc*ing way lmaoo

[@derossetmyers47]

I thought "low hanging fruit" was a reference to some guy in Greek mythology cursed to have fruit hanging within reach until he tries to reach it.

[@onkelpappkov2666]

​@@derossetmyers47That'd be Tantalos, who'd receive eternal torture by just never reaching the fruit that's almost within reach. But that's the opposite of the "low-hanging fruit" saying.

[@derossetmyers47]

@@onkelpappkov2666 I meant the fruit is low hanging until you reach for it, but yeah, I can kinda see your point.

[@Apeiron242]

Stop attending DIE events.

[@themultiverseproductions8492]

This woman can't say NO to anything

[@Notime4646]

Glad to see Onion still got it. Thanks to little dumb things that people do(I don't say it in a bad way) and people which are straight up ignorant(I said that in a bad way), The Onion will live.

[@joshcade918]

That's right! @theIce... man9612.

[@alvallac2171]

*do (I *ignorant (I

[@Bisexualconfusion]

You both are stunning and brave for refusing to use any words that start with 'N'

[@cloudbrooks]

😭 the way she was miming a handshake

[@AgentAlmost]

As someone who helped start a chapter of a left wing org that eventually fell apart for some of the stupidest reasons possible, this is so insanely on point that there's no way that at least one of the writers of this video isn't basically writing from their own firsthand experience and changing a lot less details than you may think.

[@internetomatic]

you too huh. kinda sours you on the modern left doesn't it. they just don't care about building anything like we did in the old days.

[@richardarriaga6271]

I wonder if an Onion writer is secretly a wiggler.

[@AgentAlmost]

Uh I meant experienced people unironically acting pretty close to this firsthand, not is/was this person.

[@AgentAlmost]

If I listed things that actually happened which parallel stuff touched on in the video (so much is packed into

[@MarsofAritia]

join the chud side brother

[@Lancelliot7]

I feel bad for Nick. She stopped saying his name

[@alanjefferson1127]

Onion absolutely killing it as always. And thank you Kelsey, for showing us there's a better way.

[@laketrout73]

She has inspired me to also stop saying words starting with "P" "I" "H" and "Z".

[@Darth_Insidious]

You just said an I-word lol

[@lolgyllenhaal]

You just said an -H word lol

[@Redkitt3n14]

[@sownheard]

Lies Spotted

[@MyBigRed]

Ey, you wanna go get a slice of 'a?

[@jordanmccarty5892]

"He said the N'-Word so he was fired." "Which one?" "DOES IT MATTER?!"

[@IstvanDosa]

Legend says, after issuing an apology for using such words, she stopped using words with the letter 'W' since i'ts an 'M' but upside down.

[@BlueBeetle1939]

"Cheesy chips" murked me the onion really still got it

[@TheGloriousLobsterEmperor]

She singlehandedly ended racism.

[@thebaysix]

RIP to everyone living in Norway

[@iii___iii]

Just call it, Vikings Land. 😂

[@Shennzo]

What worries me is that there are probably people who think and would act this way for real

[@kevintse2870]

Not quite but this might get picked up by Matt Walsh who would say, “Look here’s the thing: You’re ALLOWED to say the word Nachos. It’s part of being an AMERICAN.”

[@drewwhitney7327]

I once saw on Facebook a British lady used the word “snigger”, the British version of “snicker”, and some Karen from Wisconsin lectured her with feigned shock and in the most sanctimonious and ignorant fashion on how to speak English, and how what she said was somehow racist. “I just can’t believe… Do better.” For crying out loud, even the US versions of Harry Potter have the word “snigger”. It’s how they say “snicker” in the UK.

[@NoOne-bp2jw]

​@@kevintse2870 I could see that happening.

[@Zinozad]

Not just "would", they do. For real. I sometimes don't understand what The Onion is trying to do. I thought they were supposed to be satire, but so often they're just replicating real life, it's disturbing.

[@ob2kenobi388]

(In sign language) "After discovering several facts, such as the word "black" starting with "B," the word "racism" starting with "R," and the "KKK" having three "K"s, I have vowed to never say any word that starts with a letter. Thank you."

[@LiquidArmProduction]

I refuse to use that letter at all.

[@SC-RGX7]

We need a The Boys x The Onion combo. This will shake the world.

[@winterberry3412]

YES

[@jesterflint9404]

"I think, if a black person had been there, they would have shaken my hand and said thank you". Comedy gold right there...