Who pays on the first date?

[@love7loyalty-MHA]

In my experience since I've been listening to Uncle Tony, I've followed this advice by offering to pay my half on the 1st date. Both times were positive experiences. Uncle Tony is absolutely right when you offer to pay your half it allows the man to show you, "He got it" I had a 1st date a few weeks ago. When the bill came I offered to pay my half. The man said "No, I got it. Idk what you're used to but you'll never have to come out your pocket with me" I've left a comment previously about this topic. The 1st time I offered to pay my half, the man paid and said "it's refreshing to come across a woman to offer to pay for their meal" Neither of the times did they expect for me to pay when we went on more dates. Uncle Tony knows what he's talking about

[@nikkinanette8807]

Agree; the same thing happened to me.

[@princek1135]

Facts only 🧡

[@Mindsetolympics]

The main reason why I like that is because it creates an opener for that conversation…thanks for sharing it’s encouraging to hear it went well.

[@love7loyalty-MHA]

@@Mindsetolympics 🙂🙂 you're welcome

[@Leelang931]

Exactly, I did the same thing! It works ladies

[@hankgreenswife]

Being feminine isn’t being needy.. it’s being able to confidently receive.

[@reinaquisha9418]

Tony I offered to pay for my half on a recent date. The man was so surprised! He said no other woman has ever done that. He paused and said no, he had it but he thanked me for offering.

[@spiritualpriestess1316]

I have always done this, on the first date. Because we are still feeling eachother out! And even when they insisted in shock on paying that bill...I would still try to pay for the tip. (I am stubborn in letting people know I went out with them to learn about THEM....not what is in their wallet).... It is sad how many females act these days, regardless of age. But it sucks for good women at the same time.... Bc we get categorized with the dependent females.

[@love7loyalty-MHA]

I concur. I do the same bc of Uncle Tony advice. Tony knows what he's talking about.

[@reinaquisha9418]

@@love7loyalty-MHA indeed he does💯

[@clarkclarke]

yep...I make sure I can contribute...add to tip ...have money to get home etc.... Pauletta paid for the first date ...NOT Denzel ....LOL!!!!

[@love7loyalty-MHA]

@@clarkclarke oh wow! I didn't know that about Pauletta and Denzel. And.. good for you. 👏🏾👏🏾 I honestly believe this is the way to go

[@lmbarnes3]

I told my son to never have a woman pay anything. If you cant afford her she is not one you should date. If she pays the relationship will eventually turn to Mom-Son. I told him you dont date random, choose wisely.

[@dustrepellent8986]

👆🏽THIS PART👆🏽.

[@arandaholley1719]

Dating random.will lead all types of people into your life.

[@Dr.Elaine1]

A lot of us women are old-fashioned dealing with new-fashioned men.

[@Dr.Elaine1]

@Bear L The problem? It is a reality that we must face. It’s not realistic for women to want old-fashioned men when a lot of us are not old-fashioned women.

[@KrystleLaughter]

From experience I already know what Tony is going to say. Thanks for all the wisdom and advice. You’ve given me the strength to leave my toxic 8-year relationship, helped me become a life coach, write an international selling book & start my KZbin channel to help other women. Thank you.💕

[@rosagreene4364]

Tony, I went on a date yesterday and offered to pay my half. The man smiled and said he appreciates the gesture and he likes my way of thinking. He paid the bill with a smile on his face. Ladies, Tony ain’t lying! 🙌🏾

[@sunshinexoxo4984]

To me dating is too stressful for wanting to go on a date just for a free dinner. SMH

[@reinaquisha9418]

💯

[@ysmithriley]

@Sunshine xoxo Some women are ONLY OUT for the FREE MEAL.

[@zenahaynes9736]

This is so true. I hadn't even thought of that.

[@QueenConsious]

Exactly I have had men ask me out to eat and I said no because I knew they wasn’t the one for me and I don’t want to waste their time or money have discernment

[@Leelang931]

I just recently went on a date, I did exactly what Tony said on this video. After dinner, I offered to pay my half, this man bout fell out his chair and jokingly asked me to marry him lol. He said he never had a women to volunteer to pay for herself. They see all of what he has and go crazy. He said i showed consideration and it makes him want to give me anything I want. I made it clear I don’t need anything from him, just honesty and respect. Of course he paid. But ladies please listen to Tony, this man knows what he’s taking about! After our date, I was able to confirm through this guy what Tony explained about a good man. (Just listening to him talk, me talking less)

[@SimplyFitwithJay]

When me and my husband were dating, I paid for like every 3rd date or so (the whole check). He greatly appreciated that. He said it let him know I was a team player wasn’t just using him. I really didn’t mind and it’s not that big of a deal or make you less of a woman like women are making it seem like it is. Lol. We’re happy married now and don’t do 50/50.

[@AllThingsTiffanyTV]

I agree with this. Every 3rd date yes.

[@kattodoggo3868]

Using him for what? A dinner. Guys really have some big ass egos to think that a woman will be meetings and sit through a date just to get a free meal xD

[@DebraJohnson]

@@kattodoggo3868 Right! As if most women would really waste the time to go on a date for a meal. Most women take ourselves to nice places and brunches all the time.

[@shayaustin8106]

My favorite life coach!

[@onlyfrenchell96]

Whomever ask a person out should pay 4 the date. Usually a real man, would pay for it either way, but there's so many woman who don't know their value, who sadly, end up paying.smh Personally for me, if u ask me out, I'm expecting u to pay. I don't plan to go dutch, cause if I do, just know the date is over after that...Goodnight

[@jacquelinef7174]

I agree 100% with this!

[@princessdiana2737]

Amen❤️

[@membering]

Yeeeessssss!!! 💯

[@beefaye6861]

High 5 up top✋....don't ask me out if you need help on the chk....I got food at home....be gone 🏃

[@2cut32handle]

Exactly, I'm minding my own business then a guy comes up to me & asks me for dinner. He is expected to pay since he invited me

[@Dr.Elaine1]

“Is when you going into a relationship today as a women, you want to come in and let a man know, he is not needed but wanted.” TG

[@Dimples3434]

🙌🏾

[@adannegadison877]

Tony the real ones know, you are authentic. I take your information to heart and to God to reform my mind! God is going to bless you beyond what you know, for this ministry.

[@jammy5181]

That mimicking the feminine woman part has me weeeeeping 😂😂😂

[@meechiemishae4642]

EVERY SINGLE TIME🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Hoppinwithhago]

no seriously he's a comedian!! one of the reasons I look forward to his videos lmao

[@Krissycarla]

Girl I was driving while listening so I couldn’t see him and I was screaming lol 😂😩

[@relisbetrel]

@@Krissycarla 😂😂

[@reinaquisha9418]

"That wasn't even chivalry, that was oppression."- TG EXACTLY 🙌🏾

[@TheBthebabe]

Yep, oppression, depression and suppression

[@natashaj9366]

I have followed Uncle Tony’s advice as well and it has worked in my favor each time.

[@thehustleandteashow7331]

Women should never go on a date BROKE. At least be able to afford everything YOU order. But if the man seem like he on a budget just let him know you will leave the tip. But he shouldn’t ask a woman who he is interested in exclusively, on a date with little funds.

[@Kaylagregg2076]

Honestly if the man character not together it don’t matter what you do offer to pay half, pay for the whole thing , don’t pay half he will still do mental gymnastics to put you in whatever box he wants you to go in gold digger user etc and if his character not together it don’t matter if he pays or not either you don’t know if he is a good guy. ugh dating makes my head turn into circles 😫

[@nikkinanette8807]

Look at the positive and hope for the best man. Pessimism will cause you to attract those exact men.

[@Kaylagregg2076]

@@nikkinanette8807 I live in reality it’s not pessimism. You can’t be dating with rose colored glasses living in lala land that’s how people end up in these bad relationships and sending talks with Tony. You can attract any man it’s about who you let stay in your life .

[@misslia2538]

So true..I’m over dating at this point🤦🏽‍♀️

[@jenniferthompson5146]

He will show you his character in multiple areas and situations, so you just have to be aware.

[@shutit4024]

You’re right, even tho I was “dating” this guy he was expecting $ex, and wanted me to buy him gifts when the holidays came but never wanted to buy me any gifts even when it was 88 cent teddy bear around valentine’s... soon as he said “ I ain’t getting that sh*t” I dropped him and he couldn’t understand why 🤦🏽‍♀️

[@cindeed4422]

I’d rather go hungry than date men for just a meal. It’s just wrong. “All you got is a full stomach”-TG lol 😂

[@r.e45]

🎤‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ Same

[@clarkclarke]

and on top of that the guy then has an expectation.....no thank you ...

[@dustrepellent8986]

I ain’t NEVER met a woman that will get dressed up, hair makeup nails outfit, to go on a WHOLE date for ONE free meal. That’s a myth made up by Dusties.

[@dustrepellent8986]

@Bear L She wouldn’t need a dime in the presence of a provider. Scram dusty

[@relisbetrel]

@@dustrepellent8986 I have seen women do this first hand. It does happen. It's sad, but it happens.

[@poppysunshine3228]

I always offer to pay my half on dates. The only thing I would look out for is if he isn't paying for dates and lets you pay, make sure you're the woman he really wants. I believe a man will pay for the woman he's really interested in. Men treat different women differently. Sometimes they will provide for one and not for another.

[@FashionTechNora]

Agree I just said that I grew up with 3 brothers they all confirmed that the money he saved on you will now go to a woman who knows her worth or he feels is worth paying for.

[@kattodoggo3868]

That's. I never dated a guy who wanted to split the bill. They wanted to be with me and awere ready to pay for meal and drinks. That's how guys work. If they want you, they want to impress you. They will never even come up with an idea of you paying for a date. I have hot an exception for when you date in college. Everyone broke at that time xD

[@FashionTechNora]

@@kattodoggo3868 agree I think also what age groups will he think 50/50 on the mortgage? I admit these ideas are good conversation starters while dating

[@fancydani]

I honestly don’t know how I feel about going on a second date with a guy who made me pay for my half of the bill on the first date.

[@patricemurray6412]

Yep because he asked you out. He is trying to get to know YOU!

[@FashionTechNora]

@@patricemurray6412 Agree also allot of examples the couple met when they were in college! I respect it but I also want grown women advice for grown men! A grown man might feel you are not used to getting treated like a Queen

[@durbansaladyinaccra2173]

@@FashionTechNora Yep, I get your point, cos we dont want no man thinking that we accept him giving us second best.

[@FashionTechNora]

@@durbansaladyinaccra2173 -YES Speaking from experience my ex used to tell me in the coarse of our first 3 dates all the women he didn't have to rise up and be a man to approach.

[@durbansaladyinaccra2173]

@@FashionTechNora I absolutely believe you and we have to remember that dating is part of the process of a man pursuing a woman.

[@officialwatchamber]

Tony truly reached to empower women and it’s so appreciated!! Continue to GIVE THE GAME Tony!! We are taking notes 📝 🔥❗️

[@acd1168]

This is so true. These men out here are not generous. They want to see you can do for yourself first.

[@deshanaeselvage8110]

This man doesn’t speak nothing but facts !!!!! Everything he ever said I can actually witness!!! I wish I could talk to him personally …god bless Tony

[@angewinou780]

The MAN pays FULLSTOP...

[@2cut32handle]

FACTS

[@violinist610]

I paid his cell phone bill the first month of meeting him and I paid for my meal on the first date. For the next 12 years, everything was split 50/50 on his end (groceries, birthday gifts for me, Christmas gifts for me, vacations, etc; every now and then he would buy things without me having to pay my half). Meanwhile, I paid all of the bills for 8 years, the first 6 yrs, I never asked him for his half, the last 2 yrs he gave me money, but I had to ask him, lol. We're married with children, I finally put my foot down and said I wasn't paying for anything else, but I couldn't even stay to see what it feels like, smh. Ladies, don't be like me, love yourself, know your worth, and pay attn to the red flags, but you already know that, so keep being awesome and amazing!!!

[@123-u1x8m]

The red flag was there from the month you paid his phone bill.... you still together?

[@violinist610]

@@123-u1x8m I thought I was helping him out…we’re separated for now.

[@mjatalent3426]

I can't wait until Tony Gaskins goes mainstream!

[@queenofpurpose7382]

Nooooooooooo.. the world ain't ready for his truth. I like it just like this

[@mjatalent3426]

I feel you@@queenofpurpose7382 Haha 😂 I do kinda like feeling I have some secret gems from the knowledge he has. If everyone knew , it wouldn't feel as scared 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@IshanaeS]

He’s had plenty of opportunity to do that but he has declined several times.😭 I don’t honestly think he wants to cause he understands his message is not for everyone.

[@WanyReyes]

Yes, it is like that!! I'm dominican 🇩🇴 and my grandmother used tell me "Do not accept anything from a man unless you're married him already. Because then you have to pay him back with meat". What she was telling me it's the same thing Tony is saying. You will have to pay with your body. I was told by my uncle to ALWAYS take my drink with me or to trash it, if I left my drink unattended. Never take a drink from a man's hands either. I had offered to pay for my meal on a date. The response is what Tony says. I just let them pay for it and I thank him. I always add as a joke, "Hey, thank you for paying for it just know, I won't pay you back with meat". 😬🤣🤣 They always reply "you're funny" or "you got jokes". I listen to Tony because he is on point! He's real!

[@angelicaangel2624]

The problem with offering to pay your half is 90% of the time it's with a man who will let you do everything 50/50 from there on. Only a tiny amount of men will say, "no way, I've got you" every time. Men should pay.

[@ashleycbla]

Well guess what, you knew up front that he wasn’t the man for you and you can keep it moving if he keeps showing you he wants to be 50/50 and that’s not what you want. The faster you weed out the men you don’t want the closer you will get to your man who is not looking for 50/50 from there on.

[@gigibrown_wright]

I will say I’ve offered to pay multiple times and every time the guy has paid.

[@honeybunny3983]

Its good to test a guy to see if he a real man or not

[@letrice2892]

To a certain degree I paid for meals with an ex and I did that bcuz I was making more money than he was plus our meals included my son as well but once I began doing that he became comfortable with that to the point where he didn't even reach for his wallet one day I said no to paying for a meal between he and I only I kid u not it was like a Mexican stand off to see who would reach for their wallet and eventually he did iam all for doing my part but iam not for being taking advantage of theres nothing wrong with taking turns paying for meals it shouldn't be one person's responsibility

[@TARLEASE02]

While that may have some truth to it, Tony gives this advice to empower women...he says that in doing so you will see the true nature of a man. If he always has the 50/50 mentality (in the early dating phases) then you'd see that quick and you can drop him before it becomes monogamous. He doesn't lend this info to keep us down. He fully believes that a man should pay. 🙂

[@membering]

HE PAYS ON THE FIRST DATE. AND PRETTY MUCH EVERY DATE FOR THAT MATTER. SORRY BUT WOMEN STILL NEED MEN TO BE MEN.

[@2cut32handle]

Exactly! How do they invite us out & expect us to get all dressed up just to come & pay half of the bill LOL these dudes are pathetic

[@ButterCookie1984]

Agreed

[@mika2707]

Ok so Tony I offer to pay my half, and he says “sure”! And I leave the date thinking from now on he will expect me to pay half that’s not a date. That’s two friends hanging out. That’s how I see it

[@kattodoggo3868]

I would offer but if he accepts my offer there is no other date. I still offer to pay but in my mind the man is to pay for our date

[@love7loyalty-MHA]

One thing about Uncle Tony.. he gonna mention "Ted Bundy " 🤣🤣🤣

[@meechiemishae4642]

You hear meeeee?!!!! (In Tony's voice)🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@meechiemishae4642]

You hear meeeee?!!!! (In Tony's voice)🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@love7loyalty-MHA]

@@meechiemishae4642 🤣🤣

[@missysmithy25]

Hi Tony, May you please make a video on why women initiate 70-80% of divorces? This is the proverbial argument made by men who refuse to get married. But, I believe that women who initiate divorce are not necessarily the ones who are unilaterally responsible for the breakdown of the relationship, since divorce is simply a legal term. So when men make this comment, it automatically absolves them of any responsibility when they shouldn’t be. Are men less likely to initiate divorce based on ego and pride? I know that, in comparison to women, men can be in limbo for a long time. I think that this would be a very interesting topic since it’s an aspect that have never been thoroughly discussed.

[@tosin1018]

I believe if you are a good woman, most men will not leave you even if the marriage have broken down and they know you are not happy and they are also not happy. Even though the marriage is not working out, 90% of women continue to serve and give on the home-front consistently. The man benefits from this - you being the home keeper, chef, babysitter, and sex partner- he will continue to hang on to this. He doesn’t want to lose these things even if he is unhappy. And he is able to go outside and still live single while married.

[@reinaquisha9418]

"My QUEEN fund" I love it💯

[@spiritualpriestess1316]

Also... Whether or not a connection is there by the end of the date... I think we should both be able to be honest and upfront if we get the friend vibe, romantic vibe, no vibe... ESPECIALLY if you AREN'T feeling the other person... DO NOT take advantage of them. Pay your half. Let them know why... And go from there.

[@Bohemiangoddess222]

I can’t feel nothing if I’m paying for myself. We homegirls

[@ButterCookie1984]

💥💥Tony, on the flip side, I'd love to hear you talk about women who take care of men (not their husbands) trying to get cool points but getting fool points.

[@durbansaladyinaccra2173]

"fool points" 😂😂😂

[@shutit4024]

I know a woman who’s taken care of her no good boyfriends son 🤦🏽‍♀️😩

[@tammaramencias495]

24:05 the accuracy of this message is mind blowing. I really hope women are soaking this knowledge up.

[@beefaye6861]

"DON'T GIVE A MAN A DIMEEEEEEAH" 😂😂😂😂 TG

[@whitneymwangi]

As a recovered red cross, I affirm that this advice is valid and needs to be practised religiously. I heard you talk about it previously and decided to try it. It was daunting at first because allowing a man to pay my bill was my way of showing him that I can be submissive. Basically, minimising myself so I do not intimidate him. Of course, this only led to me being a walking ATM. But offering to pay my part, actually exposes men who are uncomfortable in a woman's strength by the way they handle it. A simple move, that saves me from an experience of abuse months down the line. I like that @TonyGaskins clarify that it needs to be a mindset shift, not a mind game.

[@TARLEASE02]

Yesssss!!! Say it louder for those in the back. He says to do this so you can weed out the bad ones. I think people aren't getting what he's trying to say. All they hear him saying is pay for the man's meal, when he's actually only saying offer to pay for yours to see the nature of that man. It let's him see you and you see him I think.🤷🏾‍♀️🙂

[@whitneymwangi]

@@TARLEASE02 Absolutely! A mindset shift that allow you to be seen accurately & you to see accurately straight from the beginning

[@Dimples3434]

Yes sir.. Tony popping these videos out 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

[@jenniferthompson5146]

“I actually left my wallet at home”. Stop making fun of me Tony 😂

[@nikkirowland]

It’s the acting like a woman talking about being in her feminine for me! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@jewelsafire6844]

First dates are usually interrogations. One personal question after another, now we're expected to pay half? I have no problem paying my portion, bc then we'd be just friends. If I'd even be bothered to go out. But that's just me.🤷🏽‍♀️

[@beefaye6861]

Idk....jus don't ask me out to pay for my own dinner....this was your idea.

[@jewelsafire6844]

@@beefaye6861 Right. If I'm paying, it'll be difficult to view this date romantically. I've never had an issue with a man paying, especially on the first date. Even my old college buddies paid for meals. And I'm not desperate to be fed by anyone. I can get my own food now.😅

[@beefaye6861]

@@jewelsafire6844 See..😂😂😂

[@socialdistancingon8333]

A lot of times, the questions asked of me are: 1) Does she cook? 2) Does she clean? 3) Does she sew? 4) Does she depend on anyone else for anything? Hhhmmm...seems like you're depending on me for plenty. With that, why would anyone think I even want to pay for my meal at that point?

[@jewelsafire6844]

@@socialdistancingon8333 For Real!🤦🏽‍♀️😂

[@lsmith6718]

Such a Blessing. THIS is one of those red flags I didn’t catch, with the “grown boy” - when the Lord led me to this channel. He was dropping subtle lines about being 50/50, the woman working just like the man…. I could have saved myself months🤦‍♀️. On the flip side, I dated a guy that said he loved my independence, and that I didn’t feel entitled. Because of that, he treated me like a queen, and gave me anything I wanted (within reason😊). Unfortunately, I recognized other red flags🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️.. Take heed ladies. Tony (and Sherie), we appreciate you🙏.

[@veronicakimbrell8256]

Perfect timing! I’m going on a date tonight lol

[@danyelgarcia3689]

Keep us posted. Lol, I'm all in the tea. If you offer to pay your half let me know how it goes. Have fun, stay safe. Don't let him know where you live if this is the first few dates.

[@beefaye6861]

Grl keep yo coins....😂😂😂

[@patricemurray6412]

@@beefaye6861 Exactly 💯😆

[@tyshaso9277]

Mr. Tony Gaskins.. always on point.🎯🔥🎯🔥🎯🔥🎯

[@baileysraves9861]

Tony you are the GOAT! A lot of ppl are attracted to negativity and there are so many TED talks about it online if ppl want to dive deeper to understand. YOU are the best and your teaching are a blessing and save so many of us on a small and large scale. Appreciate your works!

[@SusanitaEfe]

Am learning every day God bless you TG for all your words of wisdom.

[@jmbsignatures9545]

I offered to pay on our first date back in 1996, he accepted.. We've been married for 25yrs. He is the Best Man in my life ( besides my daddy)..✨

[@123-u1x8m]

Since than you been paying half in addition to your housework/child care?

[@beefaye6861]

"While you sitting there swiping right...you gone be sitting there with TED BUNDY"...Im dead 😂😂😂😂

[@AllThingsTiffanyTV]

😂😂😂😂

[@SixFootofFitness]

😩😩😂😂

[@jodianm7642]

Tony's new voice is killing me. 🤣 I love it.

[@peaceful_and_blessed2879]

Great word Tony! Even in my 20’s dating as a single mom, I always offered to pay my half. In my more recent days of dating, I notice guys are more inclined to go for coffee or drinks instead of a dinner date. I can see the logic in this. Sidenote: My ex husband paid for all our dates and ended up being 50/50 in marriage. Our incomes were the same. I wanted to be married so I agreed to that dynamic. It costs less to support myself than to go half on everything in marriage. Got to go… Hard lesson learned…

[@jenniferthompson5146]

My last date was a coffee date and later he said he uses it as a gold digger test. I think it is smart, since a woman should be there to enjoy the quality time and conversation.

[@peaceful_and_blessed2879]

@@jenniferthompson5146 yessss!

[@patricemurray6412]

@@jenniferthompson5146 Absolutely 💯

[@kattodoggo3868]

@@jenniferthompson5146 they do coffee date because this way for 100$ he can try out more girls. It has nothing to do with gold diggers. They just don't want to invest money

[@smores8982]

@@kattodoggo3868 exactly! It’s not about weeding out the gold diggers. Men like to play these games with women so they can get away with either being stingy or going on other dates with other women and not having their player ways hit their wallet so hard. And women will fall for that line!

[@Karim.711]

If I know he likes me and I like him, I want him to pay for the meal. I’m old fashioned. But…. I would always offer and then pay for the next. If I don’t want to see him again I Always insist I pay half and then I don’t feel uncomfortable

[@beefaye6861]

I like that....👍

[@donaowes8701]

Good evening blessed tribe

[@Esme8888888]

The issue is that now some men have the mentality about 50/50 so they expect you to pay sometimes especially if the women makes more income. And then the man will pay but then they expect the women to clean and cook and buy the food your going to cook . Like all of that adds up it’s so exhausting I honestly feel like dating has gotten harder. Because of women being gold diggers ruined for good women who are not trying to take advantage but just want things to be fair on both sides instead of feeling like I am taken for granted.

[@mamabearj785]

Me and my man met at work, one of the things that attracted us to each other was the fact that we both were hard workers. I would offer to pay because I feel he wasn’t obligated to pay for me since we wasn’t married but he never let me. He brought me things and I did the same. I had to take a break from working because I got pregnant and had our daughter, he moved us in and I didn’t have to worry about anything I still don’t. He encourages me to follow my career goals and even doing that he wants to pay for most of the bills. I feel like part of the reason why is because He knows I am willing to work with him side by side, never had an entitled attitude where when he was with his ex he had to do EVERYTHING including working, paying for her schooling, cleaning the house etc but she still cheated on him

[@meechiemishae4642]

Tony........ you're absolutely right!! But your female impressions have me HOLLERING🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭😭😭

[@sharonbenjamin9310]

Everybody loses when you play games as Mr. Gaskins says. I'm a masculine centered Lesbian who dates feminine centered ladies. In my humble opinion, I've dated a lady who insisted on paying for the whole bill when I didn't ask her to help. I perceived that as a sign of her being on a "power trip" and not having the capacity to allow a partner to lead in love which let me know that she and I were not compatible so I ended our connection. It's each of our responsibilities to do our deep emotional healing work to operate from a place of security, confidence and self assuredness in our personal relationships.

[@chrism826]

I went on a date before with a woman. And at the end i asked for the check she pulled out her card and she asked me "do you you want me to pay half?" And i smiled and said "its cool i got it". And i thought to myself wow she actually asked to pay half.

[@Goldforever-vp8zq]

Thank you for breaking this down because some feminine channels will say women don’t know their worth if they offer to pay their half on a first date. Some women refuse to pay out of being cheap but if I have to use the last $300 in my bank account to pay for date because a man expected something from a date after a date that I refuse to give I won’t flinch to hand that money over.

[@breannn]

We are in a different dating scene. How dating was done Back in the day, really can’t be applied to this generation.

[@beefaye6861]

You better know it ain't....

[@ButterCookie1984]

Why not? I'm not saying the two ways are the same, because they are not; just wondering why traditional dating etiquette should not be implemented in modern dating.

[@breannn]

@@ButterCookie1984 because people's mindset is totally different.

[@ButterCookie1984]

@@breannn Again, the question is why aren't traditional dating ettiquet tips not appropriate to apply to modern dating? I'll break the question down in more simpler terms: Please explain why the old skool way of dating should not be taught for new skool dating. In other words, even though people of this modern day have "different mindsets" (whatever that means), why is it bad that they might learn a more proper, traditional way to date, especially when you consider that traditional dating leads to more respect of women and to more marriages?

[@jenniferthompson5146]

@@ButterCookie1984 I agree, if God and his standards are constant, we should not be looking to appease the changing standards of the world. Be aware of them yes but don’t change for them.

[@rohneshamhorne]

This is so deep Tony, you are right!! Thank you!!

[@lyndasjackson]

😂 "stanky heifer" thanks Tony for blessing us with this video

[@yasmindavidson5171]

Wow. This is a real breath of fresh air. I actually used to follow a female dating coach (she often keeps mentioning her 'good friend RC Blakes lol). And I started to feel something was off. Anyone who disagreed with her, or tried to challenge what she said, was either spoken down to, told off or had comments deleted. She was big on 'the feminine and the masculine '. She's from the UK. So am I. And the grandiosity in the accent grew and grew until I could barely understand it. I had my suspicions she was an absolute narcissist and I now truly believe it. I came here by chance and honestly this channel is a real breathe of fresh air. Full of common sense, humour and lots of wisdom. I was so sick of how to dress as a feminine woman, what footwear to choose,.. basically how to act like a manipulative child. Tony is right when he mentions that Jezebel spirit. I love RC Blakes, but I was thinking when he had her on his channel 'he's completely under the spell of this woman, and she knows it '. Tony Gaskin you are the real deal. No check in my spirit at all

[@queenofpurpose7382]

Operating in my feminine..🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 uncle Tony GET ON MY NERVES

[@Arizona_lilly]

Wow im so proud of the woman w huge down payment 1st home single woman im 34 looking buy a house by the time im 38 but here in Arizona im lookin for single family size home 3 bed 2 bath... mesa east valley it can be older but I even thought 2bed worth condo town house will at least be Mines but my budget is 270-330K is my limit and is possible my area in gilbert 350 for town house 450 550k for single home... I can't afford so ill go 5 miles north Building credit abd keeping my small business growing to show the banks o can pay the loan.... damn girls let's get ir

[@leespicey6948]

Damn, we still dealing with this dilemma? The basic minimum? Standard procedure?

[@tabithafaulk6068]

Tony has covered this topic so many times…if he want you he will pay but you should offer to pay your half…mainly for shock value and let him know you don’t need him and you not one of those woman coming for free meal….for those who not going to make the hour😆💪🏼

[@tabithafaulk6068]

Thank you Tony for repeating yourself as many times as it takes for us to learn. You all who can stay for the hour…still need to listen to the rest because he always drops some new nuggets of wisdom on you! We appreciate you!

[@clarkclarke]

@@tabithafaulk6068 the videos are not private though.....😖

[@tabithafaulk6068]

@@clarkclarke I’m not following Clark. Everyone has the opportunity to hear what Tony has said on this topic several times if you follow him or put his name and the pay topic in search menu.

[@beefaye6861]

Lol....I don't need you....but don't ask me out to go half on a steak.....bye sir....

[@lindalovehearts]

I love the part when he talked about the very mindset i had, that in 2013 I started to realize that me and other women were raised to have...that mindset we took from watching tv seeing woman be stay at home wives and taken care of etc. that by the time i got grown things were different but my mindset was stuck in the 1800's or the 1950's (i wasnt born yet) where women only catered, had no say, were submissive, and it wasnt a partnership, it was a dominance. Im learning more and more that being independant is 🔑 key, not being codependant as I was..he be hitting on point w his messages💯

[@christineporter9914]

Bro Tony you just hilarious lol 😂😂😂😂 giving the expression about the story of Ruth and Boaz. But, you so right on point.

[@shenaniganswithshannera7772]

I have always been taught if you go on a date you always have money for what you get. If you feel as though a man is “supposed” to pay because he asked you then you shouldn’t go. If you’re going on the date you’ve agreed to get to know him. The same way he did so with asking you on the date. Nobody is owed anything. Women shouldn’t use men for a free meal because if you can’t feed yourself then you have bigger issues.

[@peaceful_and_blessed2879]

Lol i agree with you 100%. This mindset is not the popular opinion on here. Tony is stepping on alot of toes because he’s giving real advice but the advice is beneficial to us women!!

[@clarkclarke]

THANK YOU TONY!! 🙏🏾 AGREE 💯💯💯 I am a woman and I have said this before and women were upset with me .. @20:41. ayyyyyyeeee

[@ysmithriley]

Some women offer to pay so the guy doesn't think he's ENTITLED TO SEX.

[@bribri4275]

While I agree with offering to pay my half at first meeting, I also believe that the energy required to compete in the marketplace for money is inherently masculine, and thus it seems going 50/50 at any point in time thereafter is inequitable for a woman expecting to operate mostly with feminine energy, and I would hate to have to wait for children for that to be honored and respected. For a woman to be considered high-earning, she is almost, if not always more stressed than a man in a similar position. So even though we are capable of such, it seems similarly oppressive to expect our “ability” to earn to necessarily change our courting habits.

[@veronicakimbrell8256]

You sitting with Ted Bundy😂😂🤣🤣

[@shereewhite4828]

I'll gladly pay for my half on a first date, cause the only thing I'm giving up at the end of the date is a warm smile!😊

[@j-tenn226]

Same! Not even a kiss.

[@shereewhite4828]

@@j-tenn226 Amen sis!!!!!

[@dashafenty9969]

Needed to hear this Thank You Tony ❤️

[@veronicajackson6126]

Thkx for the message..I learned alot of stuff I was doing was the wrong way, soo ai truly know the difference of how to do thingz better..🤗

[@letrice2892]

When I saw the title this reminded me of the great apple bees debate that was on discussion before 🤣🤣

[@j-tenn226]

“ he took me to Applebee’s “

[@letrice2892]

@@j-tenn226 yes that video oh my it was such a big reaction from that Tony had to return later that night bcuz the comments were out of control lol

[@knowyourworth2213]

Thanks bro! Glory to God!

[@Tee_LivingLife]

I love that ("offer to pay your half") Chile that's deep thank you

[@missk4021]

Gratitude 🙏🏽✨ Tony For Your Wisdom.

[@christineporter9914]

Bro Tony I got my notebook with ever video always ☺️

[@jmbsignatures9545]

True Empowerment ladies.... ✨

[@sierram.6046]

Speak Mr. Gaskins!!

[@eugeniaperry4278]

As I watch this video, I am cracking up 😆. Tony you so funny, but it’s all Real! Thanks for giving us the Game 💜🙏🏾🤴🏾

[@socialdistancingon8333]

As soon as I meet a man who can be okay with me paying for a date, without him immediately quitting to pay for dates after that, then I will be more open to paying for any date. First, second, third, whatever. The men I've encountered recently seem to interpret EVERY LITTLE THING a woman does as desperate, and "I'm doing this because I need a man in my life", which leads to them playing games. No thank you. I'd rather stay single and spend my money on myself.

[@nikkinanette8807]

The impersonations 😩😂🤣😂🤣

[@erynd.9911]

That female voice impersonation took me out 😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 He ain’t lying it’s 2021 and so many men are tired of paying for 100% of the dates...times have changed they want to see equal effort if the interest is mutual !

[@2cut32handle]

Times have changed is not a reason to not have requirements. If someone is inviting me out to a date, they are paying PERIOD. If I invite them out then I will pay.

[@123-u1x8m]

Yeah but most men ain't doing equal effort At home, avoid those ones aspa.

[@practicalteachingchronicle6631]

Women.... with a gentle/man you don't r won't have to open the door, your legs or your wallet on a 1st day. Men riseUP!

[@productofaprayingmom]

🗣 Preacccchhhhh!!🙌🏾🙌🏾

[@ShiaGirl18]

24:00 Tony, you are hilarious! I love that you talk truth and make it fun at the same time.

[@nataliehenderson69]

Character is key when it comes to menI would help men that didn’t deserve it and they dogged me out..so good hearted and got trampled on..I learn character and then red flags is key..best believe them men came back looking,,I’m good now

[@beefaye6861]

See.....triflin bum.....

[@nataliehenderson69]

He had the nerve to try to come back after he left me for the women he wanted that didn’t even want him ..I told that bitc go back to her and let her dogg walk you some more...I’m good boo I’m straight

[@beefaye6861]

@@nataliehenderson69 Booyah !!!

[@tosin1018]

Learned the hard way too. Women who are very good hearted and very generous need to be very careful. We get dogged out and taken for a ride. Just sad. We live and learn though.

[@nataliehenderson69]

Never again

[@Eadrene]

I went out with a guy for drinks on Monday. When the bill came, I took out my wallet. He said "It's okay, you can get the next round next time." We are going out to dinner again soon and I am afraid he will expect me to pay for dinner. I don't like the idea of paying for a man. What should I do if he asks?

[@patricemurray6412]

Well if he let's you pay. Pay for it and don't go out with him again. Sounds like he trying to get over. He pay for drinks (small bill) and you pay for dinner (large bill.)🤔

[@Eadrene]

@@patricemurray6412 thank you!! Makes sense. I might also just straight up say that I'm willing to go dutch, if he doesn't take out his wallet.

[@patricemurray6412]

@@Eadrene Exactly 💯

[@RaiinbowBarf]

one time i offered to pay half and the man told me to never insult him and thats insulting to a man that i would offer....kinda scared me to ever ask again.

[@tracydeniser.n.1432]

I've had this happen as well..some men get insulted soo you really dont know what to do.

[@ashleybeverly7328]

Totally unrelated to this video, but has anybody noticed the pick up in comments from men, arguing everything Tony's got to say?!

[@tonid773]

Um must be deleted haven't seen one guy.🤔🤔

[@ashleybeverly7328]

@@tonid773 I see em, probably deleted quickly somehow.

[@j-tenn226]

I have never seen an argumentative comment on his videos that he speaks of, ever.

[@HighStreetCred]

I feel comfortable paying for my food. Some men fell like women owe them something if they pay. I don’t like that.

[@kattodoggo3868]

They do.m but it doesn't mean you should be paying for the meal for this reason. They would expect sex even if you paid for the whole meal

[@MomNurse37]

Thx T. The female impressions...😁😁😁😭😭😭

[@tinajones4506]

Listening.