Why Are You Still Single At 30 Years Old? | TDK Podcast # 88

33 and FOREVER ALONE?? Is it a red flag if your friends don't like your partner? Should you lie to your partner about watching porn?
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Cast:
• Johnathan Chua / johnathanchua
• Daniel Lim / danlim11
• Jonathan Paul / jonathanpaul.sxw
• Denise Oh / ohthedenise
Behind the Cam:
• Nashrul Merza
• Julian Chin
• Hisyam Osman
• Daren Khek
• Charlene Goh
Edited by:
Haikal Mohd

[@harshreality86]

I’m single and not searching. Someone who doesn’t know me well asked me “why don’t you want to get attached?”. Instead of answering her question directly, I returned her another question “why are you married?”. She looked at me with this bewildered expression as if I had asked an offending question; and after gathering her thoughts she replied that she had reached the age for settling down and starting a family. Just want to bring out the point that not every person is in pursuit of a relationship. Those who are can be doing so for various reasons, e.g. love, companionship, societal pressures, fear of ending up alone etc. Have also heard reasons like “too expensive to live as a single in Singapore”. Every person is unique and has unique needs and wants. For myself, I just really enjoy the freedom of being single. I am not against relationships or anti-marriage. When I shed tears at a friend’s wedding, it is because I am touched/overwhelmed seeing their love for their partner, and not because I am upset that I am single and might end up forever alone. Even if I do, it’s not a sad thing from my POV. I do believe in love, just that it’s not a must-have, nor a will-have. If love does comes by, I want to be brave enough to pursue it. If it doesn’t, I want to live my own life the way I want to live it.

[@iNeed2ppp]

Same sentiment bro!

[@AikenChiaMing]

preach!!!!!!!!!!!

[@joellegoh3194]

Well said.

[@Ryuoinsomnia]

Totally agree?

[@rcbloom]

bravo!

[@bbhee]

seriously dont know how 4 people talking can really make me stay glued to the screen intensively listening, the chemistry between the hosts are perfect. More of these contents please.

[@libraries144]

to denise's opinion on "i think i look ugly" but doesnt affect her self image or self love is so relatable

[@neyiep]

she sounds so aquarius hahha

[@hweeheng1000]

I honestly feel like Denise is such a pretty and amazing person. She might not be perceived as traditionally "feminine" in sg but she has a charm that no one can replicate. love you

[@psingh007]

Go for her man

[@AikenChiaMing]

33 AND SINGLE. ALL IS WELL. THANKS.

[@User5hhki98ncz]

You do you Boo. Live your best life.

[@cherylng9395]

Can we just appreciate Denise’s immaculate taste in water bottles

[@scorpio2342]

This.

[@belovedthread]

HAHAHAH YES

[@N5FW]

I concur!

[@hunnyo7]

My 4 year old son has the same bottle, great taste Denise!

[@Tantantantan888]

Ya omg I can’t take my eyes off her water bottle 😂

[@desrexius]

Just a general comment: the only reason i watch you guys is because you guys dare to speak the rawest stuff and speak it with truth to the point it feels relatable. Appreciate it guys. You gain a fan from Malaysia. Going back to your 1st episode and watching from there on!

[@FriendlyPasserby13]

I have rewatched several of the TDK episodes, and I was wondering why the chemistry feels so different compared to other podcasts/talk shows (the backstage bunch, IMO, etc). I came to realise that TDK worked so well because of the different synergistic personalities brought onto the show, and the opinions are often varied, colourful and do not come out as a monolithic echo chamber. Jon Paul: fresh, logical, non PC, no BS views; Denise: liberal voice of the young; Daniel: voice and representative of the majority; Jon Chua: perspective of the alpha, logical, yet a more traditional approach. In the local scene, this is by far of the best quality. Looking forward to more!! Also would be interesting if JonJon (John Lim) is invited for an episode or two (maybe about overturn of abortion in US? IDK)

[@tilarmeister]

Jon P: "so there's this girl, personality....looks: 9/10, then second girl has the opposite score" John: "10 out of 9?" Xd this John really made me cracked

[@funnygirl442]

Hi Denise! You exude confidence, a beautiful personality and smile, you are attractive! Just thought you should know ❤️

[@Whiteroca]

Denise YOU ARE SUCH A KIND HEARTED, BEAUTIFUL PERSON ILY AS A GUY TOO!!

[@ely9347]

Denise I genuinely think that u are smart and witty and grounded and u have charisma! Just thought u should know too :)

[@JuzNicky]

Denise would be one of those pals to enjoy those deep end conversations with too.

[@TheEverscar]

it so nice that everyone defend Denise when she said shes a 4. like 3 older brothers

[@ammo_conscious]

I am single because my net worth is not half a million.....yet. On another note, I am curious about the hardwarezone post. What is keeping the lady going for over 10 years in search for her partner? Is it loneliness? Is it peer pressure? Is it desperation beause of said biological clock? Is it something we cannot fathom? Or is it something she herself isn't self-aware of? I have not been in a proper relationship for my entire life, and during my early to mid 20s, i did feel envy and emptiness whenever valentine's day was around the corner, to the point i would stay indoors to avoid seeing couples get all lovey dovey. Over time, i came to this realisation that even if i do get into a relationship, my own self-esteem and identity would bend towards the dependence of being attached (to which in my partner's eyes, i would become like elephant glue, clingy af). So this realisation kinda snap the question around from "Why are i still single?" to "Why do i feel the need to be attached?", then from there i started going down the rabbit hole of being truthful and asking more vulnerable questions (which i won't announce here), which led me to today. Still single. Jokingly, i already mentioned why. But unjokingly, i am still smithing my self-esteem and persona. Just sharing my 2 cents worth, but good podcast nonetheless. I have some feedback though, try not to interrupt each other too much (especially guests/experts) because I end up not being able to follow your thought process or hear what the guests speakers have to say (especially when they are experts in their fields).

[@rdu239]

Biological clock, bigger disadvantage for women if they are into the idea of starting a family As they age, they will become less picky and more desperate, even if they are not head over heels over a guy or not entertaining the idea of traditional marriage first. Those type of women will take the opportunity just to get pregnant, even if things go sour with the setup between her and the guy, she will not mind as long as the baby is there. Women like that mentality exists, even more prominent most of them successful career women or if not women coming from financially capable families

[@zooanimal7578]

John paul actually has solid comedic timing

[@Ophius]

??? Denise is not ugly please. She doesn't fit the conventional standards of beauty but god damn she's suave, and that's attractive.

[@kyawhtethein5263]

I am looking forward to watching daily ketchuup like everyday. keep up. thanks for bringing a little bit of joy in my life guys. so entertaining

[@fadysdiary]

I believe that a 4/10 looks with a 10/10 personality, trust me when i say that person will be more attractive to you overtime

[@Ganesha6661]

Honestly, the only local KZbin podcast i watch. My question is, why is 30 the important year where everything becomes judged. To me it seems that the old idealism from 100 of years ago is still placed and has not been updated based the current lifestyle.

[@jiawei0917]

Biological clock. Not just women, cause men’s test level decrease after 30. So maybe ppl tie material/relational success to that, which is weird haha

[@EunhyukieLoveELF]

a woman more than 30 harder to give birth also, more negative aspects in terms of health ig

[@raghavnamasivayam5098]

@@EunhyukieLoveELF well not necessarily women can and many do givr birth after 30 Its a stereotype

[@rdu239]

No, biological clock, especially a bigger disadvantage on women as with the rising PCOS cases on woman below 40s, their prime capability of bearing children at this time and age is 18 up to 30 years old at best, In the 30 year old mark, women will now start to have various difficulty to get pregnant, even worse if they are 40 years old and above. On the practicality side of family aspect, if the wives birthed their first child at aged 37 years old or above, they be at the age range of 50s by the time their first child finishes their education, assuming education life in Singapore or other Southeast Asian countries typically run a span of 12 or 15 years if the child is doing good in their studies.

[@danielchoy7030]

"Looks will fade, but personality will not". A 10 at 40 will look way better than a 4 at 20. Also, people change all the time, someone's personality can change as well.

[@starsshooter99]

singlehood isnt bad…Ive decided to not get married. Marriage is not an ultimate goal of life, there is a lot to life.

[@chloelim3889]

super curious and interested to know about this: what are the casts' MBTI! i've been watching your podcasts for a while now and there are always differing opinions between the casts. all 4 of you bring different perspectives to the table, so i'm interested to know what your MBTIs are! JP and Denise seems more like the 'Thinking' type while Dan and John seems like the 'Feeling' type, but i could be wrong! so would love to see this discussion in future episodes HAHAHA have been binge-watching and even re-watching many of your podcasts. they are really informative and entertaining! love the quality debates, makes me rethink about my stand on each topic as well :D subscribed a few weeks ago and have not regret doing so! i'm always waiting for the next episode to come out to watch AHAHAH have recommended your channel to my friends as well! hope to see you all grow!

[@Whiteroca]

moments: 13:10 JP moment 16:25 John roasting JP for the Nth time 30:25 JP kena roasted again 40:40 JP baptised 3 times is his own conviction tho, it's not whether it works or not

[@vhalia]

As the saying goes "beauty is in the eye of the beholder". It is nice to be above average but it is really subjective, the tendency of equating it to physical beauty is only eye pleasing whereas the attractiveness of ones kind heart and of being humble takes it further.

[@Ryuoinsomnia]

But if u ain't have the looks u don't even have the start to even progress to personality

[@angiemf9033]

Beauty is in The Eye of the beholder. I believe character of a person is more important than their look. Denise, pls bear in mind God made us in His image. We are all his beloved. What I am trying to say is you are not ugly. You are His beautiful child💕

[@Ryuoinsomnia]

Character more important than looks does not mean looks is not impt. Often times people want both, or some even just want looks and willing to suffer in a relationship. It only takes a more mature person when they reaches the older stage of their lives then they prefer character

[@bchpls24]

everytime someone ask me why im still single, I told them im asexual. 98% change topic immediately. 2% ask if that means DIY in the evening.

[@bchpls24]

@@cathhl2440 you're the super kaypoh one

[@tengkuelleiatengkuibrahim3952]

No matter how ugly Denise think she is, you guys never fail to make her the most beautiful being on earth...u guys ROCK!

[@jasonchua9112]

Really enjoyed your content and certainly think this channel deserves many more subscribers than what you currently have!

[@tehokosong]

Ultimately you got to look inwards to differentiate what are needs or wants in a relationship. A lot of requirements are actually wants and cutting people off due to wants before even working through if they meet the needs is actually quite a big reason why people are forever alone. That alongside the woe is me attitude, it really affects how friends perceive you. Being confident and comfortable in your body is very important as well. A good gauge is to take stock how you interact with people that you are attracted to and that you can hold a conversation and they reciprocate in the engagement.

[@adreeves78]

Totally agree with Jon Paul on the judgement of the Reddit lady (around @11:50).

[@Josh-hs5hp]

Do you believe in 'letting nature takes its course' or ' if you like someone, you should chase' ? 😆

[@aidz-pn5oe]

Thanks for sharing. Learning as I go along to encourage and have better discussions with my children and cousins. I must say that I did not have the problem as I never thought I would ever get married. As I am not a conventional person in a very traditional environment. But here I am married with children.....

[@tengkuelleiatengkuibrahim3952]

Denise, you are BEAUTIFUL!… & these 3 guys surrounding you, were indeed most BEAUTIFUL for saying that you are!❤❤❤❤

[@Raejumjum]

Aiyo Denise and the smol duck there goes my heart

[@amatsu_kizushi8921]

well, there's a function in premier pro auto-detects what you say and change it into subtitle for you and into a different language as well. great software to use

[@amandatan8385]

Can we have more psychic contents with guests in these specialization to engage in a longer conversation giving us insights as well? Such as linking to the MOSG ep on animal whisperers/mediums/people who can see & help spirits/fortune tellers possibly speculate about how and what you guys are etc please?

[@Jejdjejbfjf]

Science is not that absolute - scientific studies may say men are likely to have multiple partners, but there are also scientific studies which show the benefits of a monogamous relationship. So it goes both ways and is not so simplistic.

[@redvolver]

Btw I thought it will be very interesting to interview Steven Lim. To really find out if he really is who he is protraiting in front of camera.

[@naanyangdiaries]

if the girl in question is watching and reading the comments space, my advice is, don't be desperate and don't fall deeply infatuated with the first person that comes by. desperation shows and desperation is a huge turn off. it also attracts the wrong people.

[@nameisezio1963]

i choose to be single cause i suffer from mental problem that is emotional distress and i do not want to be burden...

[@juniorly4]

hope you feel better soon

[@MrYuhaoChen]

Having some medical conditions and thinking myself as a burden to the society and my family. So never think about drag somebody else in.

[@nt6253]

Denise is at least a 8/10!

[@JuzNicky]

34:10 I agree with JC on when guys appear in group outings more so if he is the bf of some one. all that alpha shit is very annoying on one hand. or on the other he keeps bro-ing here n there. like not your bro dude. I get that guys are wired differently compared to girls. but Dan, don't forget that both you and your Nat's circles would be in on that disappearance thing so henceforth to ask both parties help to get introduced to each other circle's is kinda that awkward need help thing to get over with. but before each other they have that circle which the person don't know. how the circles accept the person as the other half of that one friend who suddenly now has a plus 1 has also challenges on its own. esp when the girl has mainly a predominately female pals come from girls school kinda thing. but then that would be another topic for another discussion.

[@farrhanng]

JP: I don't want peace I want problems!

[@ad1r137]

Everyone alone cuz everyone got this ideal perfect life in mind and wana get a partner that moves them towards a checklist of goals while they don't notice that the goalpost is moving. - so they keep looking for the next better one to fit Then the other worse reason is where they are compensating for other areas in their life that they failed because of "such and such reason" so they try to get a better looking, richer, smarter partner so they can tell everyone, hey this successful person says I have value just by being with me. edit: maybe its just me

[@kingseiryu929]

So basically they live vicariously and they are behaving like glory hunters

[@Whiteroca]

32:50 JP parents be like "oh this is the 10th girl liao" "yea hi"

[@mysticery]

I thought FA was financial advisor 💀💀💀💀

[@Fangs569]

I'm scarred after knowing the term 'nugget' and I am too afraid to google it

[@meluvcats]

Denise to me is a 6 but I'm almost certain she's an 11 after getting to know her

[@Avalanste]

Everyone's a 10/10 until they take their masks off.

[@previousone7446]

Pft! If only that was true..

[@belovedthread]

Denise is most attractive to me

[@cswei1000]

Think Jon Paul is more good looking than the other two guys!

[@TheDailyKetchupPodcast]

I agree!

[@batuhijau85]

Relatively good content but you guys should really try to speak into the mic. There are a couple of instances whereby your voices can barely be heard.

[@EIJIHS]

Hwz was the IT discussion place to be, became toxic and a bunch of people migrated to Vrzone for some time. After the batch sort of grow much older the community died + Hwz became more established after they were sold or something. Who believes their partners don't mast... seriously lol JP is spot on on "uncessary" advise, help given which is not requested for can be seen as kpo... those who need help NEEDs to ask.

[@jamesyue1348]

In singapore as long as you are rich ( I mean with at least $50-$100m at your disposal ) even you look like a toad, lots of people will still find you like andy lau

[@zappp7059]

love the original cast

[@SethMag]

i proceed to subscribe right after John shared followers' data activity.

[@daphineong7395]

How did TDK form? Background of each member ^^

[@prn_Melatonin]

Why? No money, no hdb, no car.

[@kennethkoh3930]

Honestly , this is Singapore n e 3 things u quoted are terms essential to a relationship. Only time when the 3 arent requirements...perhaps the woman is much older n well to do and guy involved is much younger.

[@dennisl1303]

How many subs you need to remove cap?

[@sivdoremi6058]

the new camera angle seems really low!

[@angelicomdc9199]

jp comment at the start

[@CanMakeIt]

John's awkwardness during Dan's intro rating: 4/10

[@namakutakpenting1929]

Can u talk abt the ground breaking topic 'RedPill' n relationships?

[@Graypes]

Hahaha I feel like the portion on JP talking about his fame (or I guess, the fact that he is known) is such an interesting thing. Just curious, do you guys face issues / enjoy dealing with the “fame” ?

[@cherricam]

i've been single my whole life 😆😆

[@sueshing1317]

If i Happens to See myself in the mirror, i find That Person is Not Pretty. That is why i agreed with Denise

[@yoyomaster9991]

can you guys imagine if you'll are able to interview Gary vee, that would be sick!

[@chelseapanp]

I liked this video with my fingernail 👍🏻

[@korokke87]

love you guys.. but why got some weird bg music 🥲 cannot focus

[@timothyaugustine7093]

Why am I still single at 30? I'm gay lol 😂

[@lilychua7866]

Denise, you are an outright 8.5! Totally lovable and absolutely beautiful！if I have a daughter, I want her to be perfectly like you!

[@whk4041]

The lady should read date-onomics if she wants to increase her chance of finding a partner. It is not just about dating apps or dating agencies.

[@kingseiryu929]

It's all maths

[@angelinegoh8293]

DENISE'S CUTE DUCK AT THE END

[@LittleStrawbirdy]

she say her bmi 23-24 but call herself "fat and ugly" ??

[@yapolloable]

can we have cups company sponsoring them pls 😆

[@quintonchua5461]

luv this stuf

[@kaidollarsense]

It was really right person wrong time for me. :(

[@YYeatsoftrice]

Yo yo! I do understand English lah, I just suggested Mandarin Podcast cos there was some incident that I realise SG Chinese really... quite cui, and going towards the path of MORE cui so I thought that since yall talk about interesting topics with such diverse opinion, it could capture some demographics in Singapore to not super effective but at least a channel to use their knowledge in Mandarin!

[@cherriemay528]

Can people stop asking such questions before I really throw them into volcano I hate inappropriate questions 😤

[@libraries144]

john's anti christ comment got me cracked up

[@thaimingyap1461]

Marriage is the licence for children

[@TheBlabberfish]

When I first join hwz, I was searching for it help. Now it's just gossips hahaha

[@sulianat3083]

New to the channel.. subscribed after watching this and really enjoy the conversations you guys host. Honestly I think you guys are under-rating yourselves and maybe it's because the standards are high in your society. I would rate you guys avge 7-8 on appearance but seriously extra points for the intellectual conversations. 👍💕

[@autumnite]

what's sammy boy?

[@gilchong9083]

From what was presented the lady is maybe just a simple case of trying to punch above her weight/shooting up? ..the ones that like her, she does not like...the ones she likes does not like her..& the flaunting of wealth...eg "I have money I should be able to get a handsome guy"..etc. She maybe has been rejecting guys that appearance wise are 6 (same as her 6) and aiming for guys that are 8 or 9. Fat doesn't mean ugly..if when lose weight is pretty or handsome, then they are not ugly...ugly is even when thin/fit still ugly. JP you behave like that, then you wonder why people don't subscribe..lol..failing to sell the brand. 😆😅

[@johnximus.mp4]

JP's story about the waiter that recognized him and wanted to engaged. And you wonder why 50% of the viewers doesn't subscribed. Something is wrong somewhere.

[@lillydhan]

DENISE AND THE DUCK IS THE BEST

[@cmymotion]

Denise, you are very pretty!

[@Alexa-yx6kh]

Jon can reco where u do eyebrow embroidary pls? Looks natural

[@silverhair3156]

deniseeee where u get that duck duck toy. Btw you're NOT a 4 ok !

[@DonYang73]

33 yrs old need to look for 50 yr old and above lah

[@blurberryism]

Ok so no subtitle is my take away.. could we have a little selective subtitle when yall laugh and the conversation became in incoherent..? I WANT TO LAUGH TGT!#%$@& Y'all laugh among yourself what's the point omg

[@ChinliSeet]

Cos we are blue collar workers and just want date Singaporean women

[@gs2782]

NUGGET?! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[@evegoh7224]

Sure, go on and use triggering titles to ruin women's days! :) Love y'all so much.

[@lecherhao86]

I rate myself 8/10.. honestly

[@nilnil8072]

one topic that is often not talk about is sexless marriages ( I believe it is a high % in Singapore female dominated society )

[@z.zaimie1406]

Denise is coolllllll

[@irenesarahchia9836]

Dan’s rating goes up once you get to know him. I’m pro Dan! :)

[@swearwern4286]

What makes a guy attractive ?

[@subie1019]

Money height and hair

[@mchotdag]

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