Why Aren't You GOING FOR IT? | Tea Time With KM

[@DebbieChristina]

I really enjoyed this Tea Time. I have struggled with societies expectations and I am still struggling, but that is okay. As long as you stay true to who you really are, you can do nothing wrong. I am at a point in life where I am trying to find myself and my voice, to figure out what I want to achieve in life and what makes me happy. I am glad to hear that you found that and keep working on it. Thank you for opening up like this.

[@lindacobo1744]

Love this. Mel Robbins says take the word failure out of the equation you either succeed or survive there is no fail. You can survive a difficult time and you grow from them. Glad your back

[@AuthorKristenMartin]

Linda Cobo LOVE that way of thinking!!

[@ESHart]

I love this video chat. I learned this at the beginning of this year when at the age of 56 years old I had to have open heart surgery. It really woke me up. Yes, I'm happy to say I survived the surgery and am doing well, but it was because of this that I have since started to pursue more of what I want than what is expected of me. Life is short as I discovered. I have to say as I write this my dreams of writing, creating, and designing has started to pay off for me, and so I'm glad I decided to make this change in my life. I feel excited now when I wake up every morning about my day, which I think has added more years to my life. In fact, my cardiologist is amazed at how well I am doing. I attribute it to making these life changes and pursuing what I love. I am going to save this video and watch it if I ever find myself sliding backward. Great Video, Kristen, I hope you do more videos like this. Thanks again.

[@daizchalkx8490]

That’s an incredible story, thanks for sharing it. I agree making yourself happier mentally can boost your physical health for sure. Glad to hear you’re doing well. :)

[@lindaholbrook7447]

Thanks for sharing, I am glad you are doing well. My aha moment was when I turned 60 and I decided it was now or never for the writing. I did Nanowrimo successfully that November and have been writing ever since.

[@ESHart]

Good for you. Keep writing and Good Luck!

[@jacintahudson9252]

Kristen, this video brought tears to my eyes. I have tried so hard to talk about writing and call myself a writer in the past few months to anyone I can. I am pushing myself not only to be true to me, but to show others who that person is. And yet, I can promise you, before having seen this video, if someone were to ask me when I turned up to Bali in four weeks what the purpose of my trip was, I would definitely say a holiday. And it wasn't until I heard you talking about your book tour stop that I realised that that is still my automatic go to. You really have hit the nail on the head regarding fears of acceptance and failure. I will think of this video every time someone asks me what I do. I am not just a part time waitress. I am a god damn AUTHOR!

[@AuthorKristenMartin]

Jacinta Hudson YES YOU ARE!! 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

[@authoralanaqalbertson]

Go Kristen! I love these new videos and how they're aligned with Goals book - you're totally killing it with this new direction.

[@blackpearlsofwisdom4448]

"I don't owe anyone an explanation." Amen, sister!!!

[@melissaxo9343]

This really inspired me. I've always had many opinions and had a strong mind but when I went to high school (for around 2 years) I was bullied by teachers and peers which really hurt my confidence. I was on autopilot too, trying to fit into what other people wanted me to be. My mental health was really bad and I wasn't living either. I became online schooled and now my strong opinions and confidence are creeping back. My dream has been to write a book and be an author and now I am planning my first book! I am so excited. Thank you for this.

[@DeeBlaregold]

Ms. Kristen, you are such a wise and inspiring young lady. This was such an inspirational talk for me. I have thought of all the things you’ve talked about. I have held myself back so....I do not have one book published as of today. I have two and a half manuscripts. It’s time for me to go for it, and not look back. Time is passing. Thank you for the boost!

[@teresabeasley5241]

I'm feeling like this now and I hate that it has taken me until my 40's to finally be comfortable with who I am and pursue what I want my life to be. Thanks for this video!

[@TammyTravelsTheWorld]

I'm also in my 40's and just now at this point too. I understand what you mean!

[@coryf725]

I love this new content and evolution you are having. I've been watching for a couple years, and your content (while always great) is finally having this great depth. Its a joy to watch.

[@shelley2he844]

I can testify that if you stifle your authentic self it can have devastating consequences. I ended up becoming clinically depressed and an alcoholic! I’m in recovery now, feeling better every day, starting to write and create finally, I’m 35 years old but I’ve only just realized who I really am and what I want to do with my life. I get afraid sometimes that it’s too late but I know it’s not, listening to you is really inspiring - so thankyou so much. You lifted my spirit today and reminded me that it’s not too late and fear can be over come. God bless you and preserve you and I wish you continued success and happiness.

[@RebeccaKSampson]

“Am I failing enough?” Oh that really hit home

[@fallinginfiction]

This topic is very relatable to me, and I struggled with a lot of what you discussed, during my junior year of high school, as a fellow writer. I’m about to be a freshman in college, and am happy to say that I don’t struggle with those thoughts so much anymore. I’m really enjoying this series, and you’re channel as a whole! I never knew how much I’d relate to this, until you spoke about exactly what I’d felt for months! Thank you for sharing your experiences.

[@BooksAreMyHart]

"recovering perfectionist" needs to be on a t-shirt ASAP. I am right there with you. LOVED this video so much.

[@samanthadavidson9303]

I'm so late to the party with the praise for this video... I'm only just able to watch it, but you are absolutely nailing this new vibe.... This is exactly what's missing in the community... Thank you for being so real, so vulnerable and so insightful. I can't wait for more of these tea times! "Am I failing enough" seriously? Yes Yes YES!!!

[@AngelaAnne]

Love this video! Especially your points on failure and living your dream life. However, I feel like whenever I start trying to prioritize living my dream life and my passions, other area of my life begins to demand more of my attention (my college classes, my thesis project, family situations, etc.). I know you have a lot of videos on balancing life and productivity, but do you have any advice specific to college students about how to live your dream life while balancing responsibilities?

[@sarakat3707]

I feel all of this so much. That moment hit me when I was pregnant. I didn't want my daughter to be raised by someone on autopilot, a person who was too afraid to go for her dreams and just worked and went home again and again. I let my fear of judgement get to me for the first year of her life, quietly writing and saving drafts. I published in March and it's going great! I'm still shocked that people like my books! I'm still afraid to tell people I'm a writer but I'm trying to shake it off. You are so right, I shouldn't let other people's opinions dictate my life!

[@GraphxxGrrrl]

Not only are you fabulous at speaking in a positive and inspiring way but this style of video (more casual and personal) is refreshing to see on social media. I definitely think it's a great, and healthy, practice for creative people to share their struggles, journeys, and experiences. Looking forward to more of these! Next time I'll have my own tea ready. :D

[@BeckyMa9482]

This was apropos. I'm in the process of finishing the first two novellas in a series I'm writing, and I recently started a new job. I was suffocating at my old job, where I honestly felt like the company didn't want me to excel at anything outside of their goals. They continually praised me for being a writer, and wanted some writing assistance, but never gave me writing work. My new job isn't writing-related, but I feel like my brain is waking me up, and my creativity has been refreshed. It's invigorating. Great video. I look forward to more teatime. :-)

[@belcampbell7274]

another amazing video. i've struggled with telling people i'm writing a book because of the fear of being judged, but recently i've been a lot more open about it. i even post snippets of my writing on twitter now! it's so sad how common it is for writers to feel like they shouldn't talk about their passion because of the fear of people judging you, or the fear of failing. this video is so motivating❤️

[@azureocean8571]

I looooveee iit 😍 this was amazing 👌👌 totally liking the new direction ^^

[@michelleleigh7200]

This is so unbelievably relatable. The whole time, I was like yes girl, you get it!

[@stiankallhovd7041]

Yes, Kristen! Please make more tea time videos! You've really accomplished a lot in your career. I must admit, being only a few months younger, I sometimes feel envious of you because of all the creative projects you've completed. I guess that's due to a combination of having been shaped by the past and being where I am in life at the moment. However, I know you're motivated to create because you genuinely care about the well-being of others. And I know you've put a lot of effort into getting where you are. So you really deserve this experience. I can only wish you greater success for the future. :) Best wishes!

[@EmmaRosenBooks]

I love this! I have always fought to not be in the box, to do things that I want to do. Although, in my twenties I was broke and the box gave me money. Now I have enough financial freedom to pursue my truth

[@tylerwang1621]

This Tea Time was very relatable for me. I am going through some of the same struggles that you were a couple of years ago. I don't have a college degree, but I still work in the corporate world writing software. This video in particular really made me feel as if I am making the correct decision. Thank you.

[@anne-marielandry4465]

I loved this new format. I really needed to hear this. You are amazing Kristen! Very wise.

[@tavonwright8330]

I wasted about 4 years of my life after I graduated high school due to fear of failure. There was one project that I was working on and was making good headway in, too when I started fearing that it wasn't good enough and that I was copying someone else. I gave up on the project and didn't touch it again. But ever since discovering writers like you, Vivien Reis and Jenna Moreci, I've felt more inspired to write and start learning about the writing process again, because I know that while I have ideas, I need guidance and a mentor to help me develop and finish my book. I've decided that it's time to stop messing around and start pursuing my dreams of writing my book series. Again, thank you for this video (as well as your other videos; I've been a subscriber for several months) and please continue to do more content like this in the future. I'll be checking out That Smart Hustle on Soundcloud as well to keep myself motivated :) Tavon

[@celestialskies-covers]

I can't explain how relatable this video was because . . . I want to be an actress. I know, many of you might be thinking, what am I doing here on an author tuber's channel, but honestly, I love writing too and I dream of getting my books published one day and also doing movies. But I am afraid of what would my parents would say. How my teachers would react. I know probably they would laugh in my face and say that I'm a loser. Your video has re-ignited the fire of being an actress in me, Kristen! Thank you so much!

[@marlowyork7089]

I love this. I totally relate to the feeling of being stuck in a rat race with no joy or creativity. It's nice to see others who feel the same way and understand the struggle of a creative soul trapped in a less-than-desirable job or life situation.

[@lexysartworld]

Gosh, this was a really eye opener!!😮 Thank you Kristen for encouraging me and everyone. Really appreciate it. Now I'm pumped up for another writing session.

[@Sina-aka-potatosupreme]

I love this Tea Time video, just like I love your podcast. Whenever there is a new episode I immediately listen to it, most of the time when I am outside on a walk, because it is so inspiring. When you talked about the judgement of others, I recognized the influence of the confirmation bias for me. The more I doubt myself, the more I tend to listen to the judgement of others, because my head tells me: "Yeah, that's what I thought about myself all along". I feel that the more I got rid of these thoughts (muted them), the less I get affected by other opinions. I hope you have a wonderful day!!! And I send you lots of love from Germany. Sina

[@DamonAddicted]

I totally needed this today, and I LOVE the concept of tea time. It felt like a podcast episode that was a little more personal with a dash of your writing advice videos. I just registered for Conquering NaNoWriMo, printed my workbook out at work, and got it in a binder. :) I'm ecstatic to dive into Preptober this year. I've tried NaNo almost every year since I was 13 and always manage to get stuck around the 20k word mark. Hopefully this year, with renewed determination and your step-by-step advice, I can finally win!

[@kaylatrevino1653]

This video is very inspiring. I shared it with a friend. We are both trying to find a place for ourselves since we graduated from college. I have failed quite a bit and took jobs just to earn money but l have hope for us. Like you said, there are other paths and doors. We will get there and continue to grow. Thank you! :)

[@neiljvoice1603]

Just stumbled across your videos today. This was very inspiring ,nice to see I'm not the only one who has spent half my life just questioning IF I should not that if I just go ahead.

[@Elisasauveauteure]

Love it ! It makes me think about a lot of things in my life.... I just love this kind of video where you are talking from the heart

[@mical7582]

Thank you for talking about this subject. Please do a video on how you managed your perfectionism because that is the main thing holding me back. I also care too much about what people are going to say about my writing and stories so I just don't write.

[@sarakat3707]

I downloaded your 5 steps guide and it really helped identify what I was truly scared of. Thanks for all of the amazing content

[@NandaMariaRocha]

Amazing talk. I love this format and everything you said was exactly what I was needing to hear at this moment of my life.

[@monikakatarzynak.8301]

Thank you so much for this video. I love listening your podcasts, and now the "Tea Time" ...oww it's great!

[@KerriB]

I love how I suddenly remembered it was Monday when I saw the notification ❤ I work from home so it's easy for me to forget.

[@missfabidia]

I loooove your mindset, then you for this. PLEASE do more videos like this one :)

[@creativenight8639]

This really struck a cord in me. Lately I've been struggling with apathy because of my fears and self-doubt when it comes to going after dreams and just being myself. Its a hard thing being who you're meant to be when you want acceptance. Thanks for sharing your thoughts in this vid it's a guide post for lost travelers like me. You got yourself a new sub too. :3

[@BritchifiedPrunk]

I love this video. Please do more like this :) it's important that we realize our fears and move past it because it will only hold us back.

[@kiayafreeze7696]

I feel myself repeating "everything is a choice" from BYOG a lot lately. I'm 26 and everything you say about you 4 years ago self resonates with me. I hope my 30 year old self is more aligned w/ your present day self!

[@kiayafreeze7696]

Also, I guess I have a question. I'm in the midst of changing up my job to something more joyful and less depleting. I keep telling myself to do what makes me happy. However, a few months ago I was hired w/o an interview (or application) to do social media marketing for a few realtors my fiance works with. I hate it. In the next month or so I intend to speak to my clients about eliminating services, switching to consulting, but primarily focusing on freelance writing opportunities. It's a difficult conversation because I have only been doing it for a few months, but this kind of work has created so much anxiety it's unbearable. I've even experienced chest pain from the stress. Anyways, any tips for how I can exit this situation gracefully? A lot of these people have connections and I dont want to do my best to save these professional relationships.

[@DannaShaffer]

Just what I needed to hear! ❤️ I’ve been frozen by fear far too long and have let myself down by not going for it. I’m getting there, just need to make the leap into being a creative entrepreneur. 😁

[@joshliam1967]

Love this video! Related to so much of what you're saying here, and I really appreciate you talking about all this.

[@lisapickren6997]

Thank you so much for this video! I really needed to hear this advice today! 🤗

[@mariedesignz1659]

Love tea time! It’s like a visual podcast! Thank you for the positive vibes and the reinforcements of it being ok to follow my dreams. In the process of creating the career that is for me

[@audreydenholm8615]

The moment I realised each component of my life was exactly that, ONE piece of the whole picture, everything fell into place for me. I am that author, writing with a pen name, not to hide but rather acknowledge my day-job/'career' may suffer if I shouted from the rooftops that I write high-heat romance. Well, that and I ADORE having multiple identities - like a superhero ha! LOVE all the new content - thank you, as always x

[@ashleyjohnson9170]

This was very inspiring and something I needed on a Monday. Thank you. :)

[@lindaholbrook7447]

Love the tea time, Kristen. Keep them coming.

[@daizchalkx8490]

I am going to start using that “Am I failing enough?” strategy, sounds like an awesome way to recognise and pursue growth. Loved the story about the customs guy too, that was really touching! I’d love to see a video on overcoming perfectionism, and one on crediting yourself as well if you fancy doing that? That was a topic that kept coming back to me while watching this. I often feel like I’m stuck in the unauthentic version of myself and I spend too much time trying to please people, but the truth is I have come a long way and I think I am pretty honest about my dreams and my true self. A video about learning to give yourself credit would be really helpful for me. :)

[@midlifedesigns290]

Thanks for this one!! Keep ‘em coming!! ❤️❤️

[@WriteHollyDavis]

I always feel like you're talking to me cause I needed to hear this. Love this tea time!

[@literaryartist1]

I resonated so much with this vid. Love your perspective.

[@Philo-z2m]

Thankyou so much for making videos which help young writers like me!

[@Speakeronwheels]

I too am a writer what kinds of books do you write?

[@Philo-z2m]

@@Speakeronwheels I am working on a ya fantasy novel. Haven't exactly started it, halfway through the outlining!

[@alannothnagle]

Loved this. It speaks to my condition. Many thanks!

[@eunicenascimento6576]

Absolutely enjoyed this! So true and inspiring.

[@Speakeronwheels]

Thanks so so much for the pep talk. I really needed that!

[@Veronika.1]

Hi Kristen, I Love your podcasts and days in the life videos! Thank you for this one - kind of podcast style 💕 more of these please ☕️!

[@nightmaras]

This was so valuable! I need to get caught up on your podcast ASAP.

[@AliciaFannin]

Love this video. Thank you for the encouragement! 💜

[@bluovalgal]

Thanks for this video. I will be 49 in a few weeks with aspirations to self-publish cozy mysteries since I got sick a few years ago and can't really work what I would call a normal job... I've started and stopped my story a few times with worries of what my family and in-laws would say when they find out how i'm "wasting" my time. You're right. I don't owe anyone an explanation (other than maybe my husband) and I will move forward again with my aspiration and write.

[@HufflepuffPrincess]

Love this! Just what I needed!

[@CM_Marquez008]

Great message! Thank you.

[@himalikatti996]

Really needed this... Thank you!

[@nela_happysoul]

You are right. One of my favorite quates is "Confront zone is great, but nothing ever grows there."

[@yatharthsinghchauhan9161]

A motivational Tea time with KM. Awsm video. So much inspirational. Thanx👍

[@katelynuhrichwrites7042]

Definitely like the style of video, Kristen! 😊

[@jenniferacres8182]

Hey, fellow Houstonian author here! Thanks so much for this video. I really needed to hear this 💖

[@NicoleCChoque]

Tea Time with KM is great! 💟 Very good topic. It's so important to weed out fear and all it's "cousins" (worry, doubt, anxiety, etc) out of our lives -- to be free from fear is to be free to live. We have the authority to say, "No" to fear; we've just got to do it. 💪😊🍵Cheers

[@authortaraeast]

Really enjoyed this video, Kristen :-) Particularly around the idea of acceptance. Although I own my decision to follow my passion and become a writer, like your airport story, there are times when I "downplay" this aspect of my personality because I am afraid of being judge or afraid that the other person is going to ask me to justify this decision. Anyway, I look forward to our next cup of tea together. I hope you have a great day!

[@LiberatedOne7777]

I can so relate Kristen! The "struggle" that we natural-born creatives & non-coincidentally lightworkers & empaths, etc. endure is what I refer to as "the script" the whole planned out life script that is forced upon us to fit into the "box" or the status quo that the matrix has pressured us into in order to be validated, loved, and valued. You know, the whole "grow up, go to college, get a "good job," get married, have kids, and get the house with the white picket fence...blah blah. Many of us have wasted a lot of years simply fighting against this script and fighting for our rights to live our own lives the way that WE want to. I'm definitely dedicated to living my life MY way, and if "they" don't like it, that's fine, and if they do, that's fine too! :)

[@trendyt5568]

I loved this video I struggle all the time with being my true self as opposed to doing what society says u are suppose to do.

[@joannaholden943]

Love this video! Please do more!!!

[@jonnymarques7549]

I definitely want more of this kind of video

[@melanie.clark.author]

I live in Germany so I was having my dinner with your tea time!😄 This was a cool idea to just talk to us and as always so motivating and inspiring!! Thank you😊

[@BrianaMorganBooks]

I love this video! Super inspirational :) Thanks, Kristen!

[@chendimakes8172]

5 minutes in! Exactly what I'm feeling now.

[@melissaprieto9095]

I am so glad I came across your channel ❤️

[@Avatargeek23]

Omg! That airport story hits home. I want to be able to say that someday! 😩

[@sarojinipattayat4039]

Thanks a lot.

[@LEGOPhoenixWarrior]

I love this

[@ClefairyFairySnowflake]

I love this video chat/ tea time thingy! I'm not going for my dreams, because I lack confidence and I'm not qualified for the thing I wanna do (be an illustrator and writer/ make my own books). I definitely have a fear of failure holding me back. Wish me luck with everything! Maybe someday it'll work out, hopefully! But then I've heard of being stuck in someday-ville and not getting outta there and taking action. I need to do that. 😕

[@holistic7980]

This was great. Just as good as a TedTalk in my opinion.

[@purplegal05]

This was a great video. At the end of the day, the reason I am not going for it is because I expect to fail. I don't know why. I haven't even tried so I don't even know why I am thinking that way. But it feels safer to sit here in mediocrity than to try for greatness. I have to get out of this mindset :-/

[@PennyThompson618]

You are really hitting me where I live with these recent videos. Lately, I have been asking myself questions about what it is I really want to do with my life. I don't want to continue with my current job much longer and definitely don't want to find another, similar job. I want to be a full time writer. Okay, now that's settled, what do I need to do in order to accomplish that? Or maybe the question is, what am I willing to do in order to accomplish that and do those two lists match up at all? What do I need to change in order to accomplish my goal? Lots of soul searching going on here and your videos, as well as your #goals book, are definitely helping me as I figure it all out.

[@creepypastapudding3531]

I can understand the fear of failure... it's a hard beast to tackle.

[@melindagordon7621]

I am interested in the course u are offering where do I go to download the course

[@AuthorKristenMartin]

Melinda Gordon My website 🙂 www.kristenmartinbooks.com/conquering-nanowrimo

[@alexbrashev2348]

More vlogs! 🙋🏻‍♂️

[@KileyKeeling]

Yes, omg yes! 😍❤️

[@AmrutaRanade]

Love the new look! But the timing - not so much..if at all possible, can you post the videos at 8 am like you did before the hiatus? I loved starting my workweek with your videos and I miss being able to do that! I am at work right now and saw the KZbin notification about your video upload. And am itching to see the video right away but I can't :(

[@AuthorKristenMartin]

Hi! They were actually posted at 6AM my time before my hiatus . . . because of the differing time zones for my viewers, no matter what time I choose, someone will be unhappy with it. My videos will continue to post at 9:00 AM CST 🙂

[@imit1989]

Hi! I just wanted to buy your new course but it won't let me! What is going on? PLEASE HELP!!! Isn't this an online course? Why does it need my address and after I gave my address it said I cannot buy it because it is not available in my region.

[@AuthorKristenMartin]

Hi! What region/country? Please let me know and I will check the site permissions for this product. Thank you!

[@imit1989]

Romania

[@AuthorKristenMartin]

There was a glitch with the site, but it should be fixed now! If you added the product to your cart, you may need to remove it and start over again, but it should work. Let me know if it doesn't!

[@imit1989]

YAY! It worked, I am so happy, I've got the workbook, I cannot wait for the livestream and peptalks too. I love the design very much and your video is amazing, my entire life I have wondered why other people care so much about what others think, I always did what lifted my soul. Have a blessed day!

[@btwriterly4281]

You are just the bee's knees. I'm turning 30 in two and a half weeks... so the pillow for your back? Yeah. I felt that. I have been soaking up ALL of your videos and I'm so thankful for all of them. Thank you for putting all of this information out there for new authors! I'll be submitting my book in the next #pitmad competition on Twitter. My goal to put my first book out there before 30 is going to be realized, and it's SCARY. So once again, thank you. - @btwriterly

[@melinalay5812]

Amen

[@Mamasfarmhousekitchen]

I like this style of video, but I there isn't a style of video that you've produced since I subscribed that I haven't enjoyed. I've had similar experiences myself as I've grown into adulthood. From not fitting in, to being worried about what others would think if I spoke my truth, fear of failure, ect. I'm 31 and I still struggle with those things. But it's much easier to navigate when I can recognize and call out my fear. I am also many things that society deems peculiar. And it's been uncomfortable for me to answer prying questions. When the truth is, I am a creator, a homeschooling mom of 5, a pierced and tattooed conservative Christian, a business owner, a writer, an avid reader, an artist, and so much more. I am so different than I was 10 years ago, and I hope I never stop evolving, because there's no fun in being stagnant. Thank you for this video, for sitting down with us and sharing the evolution of who you are and creating a space where we feel safe to speak our truth.

[@ayeshaholder]

I feel like you stole my thoughts and made this video.