Why do workplace bullies do it?

How you and your workplace can address and prevent the damage done by any bullying.
Read more - www.smh.com.au/interactive/201...
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[@ReturnOfTheJ.D.]

One of the signs is that their standard of behaviour for themselves is a hell of a lot lower than what they expect of you.

[@ReturnOfTheJ.D.]

@@BladedBear If you listen just to the Narcissist, you are strictly taught to believe and know (at the deepest level) that everyone else falls short of them, their worldview, their purpose in life, their ideas. But when you look at it objectively, it's the Narcissist themselves who falls even shorter relative to others on many fronts (moral, legal, logical, ethical and in profundity or depth of thought).

[@Olewhiteman69]

I quit my job this past Saturday, after my boss yelled at me. He's done this from time to time over the past year. I work so hard to get to where I'm at, and now I'm probably going to lose everything. I will not be disrespected and treated like that. I'll do whatever I have to do to make it.

[@aforcetobeROXANNEwith]

Are you a woman? I've learned that you hv to put pictures up in your office/cubicle, pictures of you and a mate, even if the pics are old. Also put up pictures of friends/family, especially guys. Also have few male friends or family come to see you from time to time at work, tk you to lunch etc. If they are buff thats a plus. I learned this after Kanye West humiliated... I can't think of her name right now...the light skin girl with the bald head. Kanye said that KimK made him tk a thousand showers after being with that girl on an interview. That girl broke down and cried about what he said at a public event called the Slut Walk. She also cried on stage that her ex Wiz Khalifa said some nasty things about too- "can you imagine how I feel being the mother of his child." Only her mother was there to catch her tears, no men around. *If men were around, like some hood ass cousins, Kanye would hv thought twice about saying she was a dirty for everyone to hear. So if youre a woman, put up sm pictures of some males and/or hv them stop by work sometimes.

[@jmk2530]

I’m sorry this happened to you. As hard as it is, you cannot be continually disrespected by someone. I hope you have found a more positive place to work.

[@aforcetobeROXANNEwith]

The woman that was crying on stage, name is Amber Rose. If she had some brothers, uncles, crazy ass male cousins around Kanye would not hv called her dirty in front of the whole world. Same thing in the workplace, some men will yell at a women but stand down to men.

[@JoseGonzalas]

I'm in the same boat, hope you are doing OK

[@noweare1]

@Larry Turner You can yell back.

[@michaelredmond6861]

Corporate bullying is everywhere and is a cancer on society, people even commit suicide over it; while laws protect the bullies, there is no protection for the victims of these wretched narcissists.

[@williamlevy6964]

No laws until we demand them. I plan on making a serious movement about this regarding employment regulations around privacy and removing it completely. If you have something to hide where some poor person is just trying to work and do the right thing you need to be exposed and put in a jail cell where you belong. The time of forgiving and forgetting needs to end. Boundaries of respect must be enforced and if the government won't enforce them we the people need to force the government to enforce them. There's nothing the grass hopper fears more than 100 ants working together.

[@victoriapalferez-siri5952]

Reporting it? Always get worst because bullies retaliate or send others to bully you and make you seen as the problem.

[@TigerPaint92]

Bullies are jealous people. They see someone in the job that is hard working, who could perhaps expose them. They may be jealous of their personality, or their looks. They may feel threatened and intimidated by the way they make them feel. Lots of reasons. You dont bully someone you dont care about. You bully someone who makes you feel a certain way, usually someone who makes you feel less important than them.

[@DOTMH_1]

Boom.

[@janr.1077]

Tiger Paint, you said it very well!

[@elanjones9302]

@Meow But you do!

[@UlyssesAlexandreAlves]

@Meow So you think, but your bully knows better. They always do! They are very clever bad people who use their cleverness for the negative side of the spectrum. Sure they are clever or else we wouldn't get bullied by them. They target us because they see our vulnerabilites open clear.

[@tsunami8248]

It doesn't even give me hope cause who wants to be around jealousy :(

[@keiths.9239]

Most companies dont care. Ive reported about my superior and all it did was get twisted around because "his methods work." So fours months into constant critique, constant observation, and constant neglect in a job i cant afford to quit.

[@paulbrown404]

I had that problem with a coworker because his dad was freinds with the. Main supervisor he thought he was un untouchable at work but didnt think about after work and thats how i fixed it

[@flamezodiac5736]

True

[@noweare1]

@@paulbrown404 Good work, they bring it on themselves

[@spirituallyawake5019]

I was mob bullied at work..it started with one narciss manager exhausting me with an overload of work..when I started saying no to him ..the staff got started on me calling me lazy and unproductive..I became a dumping ground to some of them..an object of scorn ..I ended up actually doing double the work and more all the while aware I didn't have the resources to walk away..but every one has a limit and I just didn't go back one day..almost 2 years later the memories still hurt me..save your sanity and walk away from these situations..sometimes it is the only way

[@fatimaabdoon]

You're not alone. I have been there too.

[@gregoryforrest8970]

School bullies eventually graduate to the work place, once in the work place they like to play kiss up to bosses, then graduate to higher positions where they can really have fun with their mind games, destroying numerous colleague lives and careers, the problem all too ofter is work place bullies are very well practiced liars, poker faces, that have have a ton of experience conning numerous people through out their lives, unfazed by fear of speech or interviews so much easier for them to climb ladders to the position where they can have so much fun and get paid for it at the same time, destroying people, and costing organizations $ hundreds of thousands in lost productivity, as targets will use up sick days to recover from the bullies emotional mind games.

[@leebassett9623]

Its disgusting but so true

[@999timepass]

Spot on.

[@unknownelite5880]

The only way to defeat a bully is mob justice. Secretly record a video of the bully, and put the video up on KZbin. It will go viral, and then management will have to do something about them. They don't want the bad publicity.

[@x7Votorious84x]

Glass door is all the publicity you need. Also make sure you’re able to record those interactions

[@Dr.PlatoZorba]

Yes exactly. This has been my plan for decades. I haven't had a job in over 26 years, but I am going to look for a job in a year and I will have a spy VCR hooked up to a spy button camera on my shirt and make secret videos of my coworkers messing with people to delude themselves and the people they're messing with that they are high-ranking business executives at large corporations and for the sensation of power. I will put the videos on KZbin and send the videos to people they know like their closest relatives and closest friends and their bosses and their coworkers and I will hand out the videos personally to them and I will send the videos to their future bosses and future coworkers and I will hang the videos on the house doors and apartment doors of their neighbors along with a photo of them. I will also make sure that other miscellaneous people get the videos like their barbers, pastors and the doormen and superintendents of the apartment buildings they live in. I will also make voice recordings of them with digital voice recorders. I can't wait.

[@paulbrown404]

I carried a tape recorder with me But when I had my break down I tried to tell them what was going on we all had a sit down Managment did do anything Now that I'm working else where doing the same thing he keeps showing up on my set outs I got that on my dash came haired a lawyer to sue him and the company The resource manager said she wasn't aware of any bullying so my lawyer played the tape for them it hit the fan because he said he hasn't seen me since I left Busted Then last wk I was at a restaurant for lunch he saw me and got up and made a dash for the door called the cops the restaurant told them I got my order and left wasn't in there 3min and didn't say a word to him in fact I was walking out as he made a run for it

[@sigmasiren777]

Excellent idea💡

[@gregoryforrest8970]

Sometimes the only way to inform management is via glass door, or other blog sites like rateyouremployer, outside protests or contacting the KZbin media many of them would be happy to run this on their platforms, so when no one wants to pay attention this will get the attention needed for any action to be done for this issue.

[@PiCheZvara]

I am at the tail end of being bullied at my current work. Am 37, too old for this kind of shit, but it happened. It's been going on for 4 years now. I left a job to work with ex-colleagues. Good firm, good pay. I was always popular with girls, I am hard working, independent, level-headed, smart. I tend to get by with people well. It might sound like bragging, but I have a large EQ and a sense of other people's emotions, so I know exactly how to communicate with people. Immediately, I started getting bullied by co-workers who probably saw me as competition, which were all three of my colleagues with whom I was sitting in the office. The leader was one colleague, another one occasionally chimed in with attacks and a third one usually just waited who had the upper hand and sided with that person. I never experienced this before, so I decided to stand my ground and not let them provoke any response. The attacks increased. One of our two bosses actually helped them with the bullying, a very arrogant person. Our company had two offices - one this and another larger one elsewhere. I knew this shit wouldn't happen at the other larger office as the bullies would discredit themselves in front of others. But alas, we sat separately and they always acted friendly during joint company meetings, teambuilding events and so on. This lasted two years until the attacks got so severe, the leader bully crossed the line. And that's when I gained the upper hand as the bullies went so far, they managed to discredit themselves. They understood that and as I started gaining the upper hand, they immediately tried to get into my personal space and become "friends". In what turned out to be the biggest mistake of my life, I briefly accepted this friendship, not because I trusted them, but because I was angry at myself for something different in my personal life and I was self-loathing and thought "who am I to cast judgment on anyone else?". That allowed them to get into my personal space under the pretense of friendship and from then on, it got ridiculously weird. Our two offices coincidentally at that time merged and we sat together. The bullies put up this faux act of overt friendship and overt cordiality so that I wasn't able to even pass them by in the morning without stopping for a 5 minute "friendly" conversation. If I didn't, they immediately started to intrude into my personal space differently. Whenever I wanted to regain my distance from them, it was interpreted like I'm an unfriendly colleague, I'm weird, which it looked like to everyone else in the company. They started even copying my behavior and personality, because they understood it worked on people and basically sold the idea they're like me and I'm some weird, arrogant oddball. Everyone in the company bought this, select few people knew what was going on, but they sided with the bullies to get ahead and stomp me out as they saw my potential. Literally no one defended me in any real way. Now, we're at a point that the bullies are acting like nice guys for two years straight, they copy my behavior for two years straight and they even grew incredibly proud of themselves by doing this as in their mind, this proves "they too can do what I did personality-wise". It's incredibly irritating, humiliating and I literally mentally pretty much broke down completely from all this stress. People see me as just weird now, even my family, even my friends, even though I tried explaining the situation - I don't get any support or sympathy. Literally no one gets this so I'm now broken mentally, overweight, batches of new grey hair, circles under eyes, tired, smoking...and of course I can't find a good job like this, so I have a hard time leaving. Right now, I'm just a shell of my former self, my friends shunned me, my dad shunned me too, the bullies are respected and liked by everyone and seen as classy and cordial people, I'm seen as a silent resigned weirdo and colleagues who initially liked me all keep a distance from me. And there's absolutely no way to correct this, I can't win as any time I would bring the attention to this, I just come off desperate, histrionic, and they appear collected, calm. Right now, I'm simply becoming redundant and off-putting and everyone just wants me gone, zero empathy. I think these 4 years legit irreparably destroyed my entire future and life, I will never shake this. The bullies won. And no one besides me cares and no one besides me knows. I am so ashamed I want to kill myself even.

[@educateke8442]

My dear, don't harm yourself. Hold on, you gonna be okay. Take this from a victim of workplace bullying.

[@traveller8867]

Terrible what happened to you. They are friendly to you now as they feel they have accomplished their goal and don't think that you're a threat anymore. You're still young and will be able to bounce back. Perhaps redundancy will prove to be a silver lining, and you'll get something much better. I've worked with real human beings so I know they exist.

[@999timepass]

Exactly my experience. Stay strong.

[@jenniferliggett6385]

You find out who your friends are in these situations. I had a naricissist boss tear my life apart, and years later I am still trying to recover from it. I too, have been isolated because I lost pieces of myself and carried hurt, anger, and emotional trauma nobody wanted to deal with, except for those few that had been through similar experiences in their own lives. The best I can tell you iss that there is power in silence. Use your energy to do things that you enjoy, and let go of those people that will not stand by you. They never were really there in the first place. Put on your game face, and quietly plan your exit stragegy. Detach. You may have gained weight an unhealthy habits to cope, but you can begin to take better care of yourself. You can gain skills or get a side hustle that will fund a way out. It is easier to see everything in retrospect and so hard to maintain when you are in it, but you can move on. The hardest thing in this world, especially for those who are genuine and want to do well, is the realization that there are people playing by an entirely different set of rules, that will have contempt for your best qualities and try to use them against you. But, once you go through it, you recognize it sooner and can avoid it. You can also be a beacon of oope to other survivors. Be who you want to be, not who others try to defiine you as.

[@kylephillip6433]

I swear alot of supervisors are bi polar and power trip

[@angelacasein7059]

The less cliquey the work environment the less likely people will get aggressive on each other at work

[@traveller8867]

Great comment.

[@coreyanderson7424]

Why did you abuse me and why are you trying to make me fail? What did I do to you? If I am so incompetent then why do you have to work so hard to make sure I look it? What's wrong with YOU? (...Should be the questions, not "what am I doing wrong ,now, to deserve inhumane and demoralizing treatment and possibly the loss of my financial stability?).

[@nittibit6662]

These sociopathic brats are strangers that make it a part of their daily routine to sit around and taunt me. They're so insecure. I just ignore them for the most part. They won't bully me again hopefully when they get a good a whooping 🤫 people need to learn not to mess with someone who can't defend themselves because there's always a stronger person who cares. 🥰🥰🥰🥰

[@danielb1uk249]

they do it cause they enjoy it

[@chelsea9641]

Exactly some people are just assholes

[@amarpalsahota6727]

I get bullies in the workplace making anoyed face's in front of me and when I am away thay laugh about me and I like wearing suits and hats and long leather jackets and long leather jackets and leather trench coats and when bullies laugh about me for wearing a leather cost and for being a good looking person behind my back and I get nervous about what thay think of me I should try to stick with the positive staff members.

[@Exiria]

Imagine how disgusting their lives are for them to be acting that way. Its very sad. Keep a voice recorder on you at all times and dont engage them AT ALL in conversation or anything. let the boss know what's going on along the way and dont forget to call the police if it comes to it. These people out here are crazy

[@kraljpetar4677]

I did have similar problem with aggressive bullies they lough me when they are close to me. I get terminated 5 yes ago. Bullies are worst people.

[@ms.bayokay4969]

Started work again and the girls in my team ignore me and don’t include me in team activities. I say good morning and they ignore me. I’m very sad because I’ve always had bad luck like this at jobs and can’t hold a job. I guess I’m weak and antisocial and have anxiety so it affects me very bad. I’m so sad and my mood is low. Why can’t everyone be niece? It’s free! It doesn’t cost anything to be niece. I know I am and I help anyone I can! It sucks a lot. I really just want to work hard and be liked. 😓😥😰

[@traveller8867]

It's not your fault. It is their fault. Bullying is epidemic and bullies are birds of a feather and stick together. Many times they will mob newcomers on the job.

[@vovanminh999]

Yeah that not your fault, you are just bad luck to work with shitty people, actually i think you are a good person, try to find a place that appreciate you, don't work with women or girls because they are very petty and jealous people, find a job that men are dominated because they won't bully you, im mean very rare unless that guy is an asshole.

[@sarrahwilson8149]

I worked at a place and had one bully for 5 years. It turned into 2 bullies on the last 2 years. I couldn't take it anymore. My 2nd restaraunt job the manager would sexually harrass me. I told but HR didn't do anything at either job. I feel like UPS should have been sued. My cousin worked there a month before I did and quit. She said it was just too bad. I don't get why Supervisors were the bullies.

[@aroasjourney]

I have run into bullies over and over again. They all just fire me in three months.

[@garyharris3771]

My last job, I ate one for breakfast. It was a soux chef. Some loud mouth emotional woman bully tried to shit stir and told him that I hadn't done this or that, so they was walking towards me (I was a kitchen porter). I heard him saying "right I'm gonna give him shit". By the time he got to me I gave him so much shit until he started crying. He left th place in the end.

[@user-xg9qz5dr5v]

90% of bullying at work comes from the human resources department and the executive team.

[@kishageorge7788]

Thank you, I needed this. I reported the workplace bullying to my manager. I feel a weight lifted

[@franzchong5889]

I can relate.DOUBLE STANDARDS AT MY WORKPLACE.the bully who does not get his way and always cracks a fruity or a toddler tantrum when we don't give into his demands to the point I have had to protect my workmates from him gets to stay on even in spite of trying everything to have him removed to another area yet the victims suffer day to day with his shit that no amount of professional help can fix and in some cases have to relocate to another site.

[@madanto2394]

I was bullied in my job as i was not wanted around anymore and everything was achieved as an excuse to try to get me sacked. Then a child sex offender was employed by that company but workers on the shift were told they'd just have to get on with it. The company hopefully got taught a lesson from this by covid19 & i hope soon in the future there is another pandemic for that reason.

[@imtired2983]

I’d rather quit my job and wait for the bully in the parking lot than go see a therapist for fucking workplace bully bullshit. I may not have a job but I’ll solve the bully problem for everyone else.

[@modiddley]

i call them workplace demons

[@gregoryforrest8970]

Over the past year I have learned about these social paths and Narcissists on KZbin there is a lot of excellent psychologist doctors out there studying this topic, and found that most bullies are narcissists, and social paths these people throughly enjoy what they do and harrrassing you is a game easy for them to play, as they have played it over and over since elementary school so lots of practice successfully conning and decieving most people, they also like to flip tables when you call them out on it, calling you the bully or reporting you as the bully, so it's wise to wear a small voice activated digital recorder behind your blouse or shirt, don't tell them or anyon you are wearing that, tape recorders don't lie, humans lie so when the story or duties expected changes daily proof is on the recorder, upload each days file on a laptop or computer at home for safe keeping .So when SHTF crap hits the fan and this person wants you gone you can send the file or files to variety of people in the firm to listen to as they like, you already know your on the hit list anyhow, so let those people enjoy listening to the lies and harrassments this piece of work is giving you and see where it goes from there.

[@timkerman8199]

Very helpful. Thankyou

[@gregoryforrest8970]

Also if you're reading this and are a newbie in a new firm here's one I have learned to keep these A holes away from you find out how many colleagues you have the more the better, if there are at least 30 and up you can tell this goon that a friend of yours is a very good friend of the current top manager or CEO and leave it at that, this power play is usually enough to get the bully A holes from attacking you playing mind games or setting you up to fail by telling you lies of the duties you are expected to deliver, a digital tape recorder will also help keep it hiden and confidential. Just by telling these goons that a friend of yours is also a friend of the top boss or CEO usually is enough to tame this loser for good.

[@victoriapalferez-siri5952]

Is more complex than that but bullies are reasons of most suicides. Cases pilled up and people depends of culture just tolerate this until they can't anymore. The victim feels vulnerable the bully feels vulnerable when victim stand up and there you have bystanders and enabler or the flying monkeys helping the bullies at times sociopath and ugly narcissists. One need to know and educate bully and the victim (s) how to communicate and how to manage his relationships in a healthy manner, period.

[@Corina-dq2my]

How can a victim or targeted person prove they're being abused at work? The employee(s) doing it, tend to back each other up. If an investigation is launched, then, likely will be that no one will admit what is happening because they don't want to be next. And of course, the bully will likely blame "poor performance". But studies indicate that most targets of workplace bullying are not incompetent and are not poor performers. In fact they often are good performers or show signs of having the potential to be. So how on Earth can a target, or victim, get any help, really? I am certainly not suggesting it shouldn't be against the law. It absolutely NEEDS to be. But, be aware of the tricks bullying workers will pull.

[@cleanthestreets9564]

Fuck that be aggressive. Earn some respect but be conscious.

[@taylortimeless]

There’s a lady at my job that’s really mean. First I thought it was all just in my head but I see they wasn’t the case. Then I thought “Hmm maybe I’m too sensitive?” Now I realized that also isn’t the case. I’m new at this job (this is my third week) and recently moved back to my home a little over three weeks ago. I noticed this woman looking at me with pure hatred. I didn’t know her (like I said, I’m new), haven’t done anything to her. This obviously made me uncomfortable. So I told myself, “I’m going to stay away from her and just do my work” Sadly they’ve started to assign me to work in the same area with…yup, you guess it, her. 😕 I completed my work and my manager asked me to go downstairs and help her with hers. Of course, I didn’t want to help out someone who’s been giving me that look and making me feel uncomfortable but I went anyway, because I had a job to do. As soon as I asked her if she needed help (I had to interact with her to get the labels from her so I could help her finish her side). She gave me that same look again then blew up at me shouting “GO OVER THERE AND HELP HIM!” Not wanting to argue, I helped the other guy. She let this other girl (who’s also pretty mean) help her, which is fine, but kind of confirm there is a problem here. She also always seems to want me to mess up so she can say something. She’ll tell me about something I need to do even though I’m literally about to do it with that same look in her eyes. Just pure hatred. Today I needed more boxes so that I could put the leftover labels on them (my pallet ran out of them). I needed what we call a “pallet drop”. I look around to ask someone who would have a walkie talkie to tell them. Just my luck, there was no one around but…you guessed it…her. So by now, I’m thinking “Here we go 🙄 “ But I needed to do my job so I asked her “Do you have a walkie talkie?” She gives me that same horrible look then shouts “WHAT?!! 😡 IF YOU NEED A PALLET DROP YELL WHEN YOU SEE SOMEONE DRIVE BY!!!!” The machines were too loud, no one could hear me, that was the first thing I did. So ofc she walks away and another guy shows up and I ask him and he’s super cool about it. Point is, I don’t want to snitch on this girl, but she is making life at my new job really sucky. I can tell she is one of those girls that like to fight (physically and verbally) but I refuse to play into that. I don’t like to do either. I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to snitch because I know there will be retaliation with other people involved. I think she may even be friends with one of the higher ups (saw them talking today). I wish they’d assign me to work with the group I was working with before. 😢

[@keiratheartistic]

As a college student, this happens more in college now. Professors these days will dislike you when you don't kiss their ass.

[@sophiex2x242]

I reached out today to my manger , about this lady that’s bullied me and others. She so rude and yells at people.

[@jamest4682]

Bullies, mobbers and scapegoaters are the true scum of humanity - filled with envy and resentment, guilt and fear and a whole host of other dysfunctions besides. Woe betide anyone who appears in the workplace who demonstrates any shred of decency and goodness because, rest assured, these scum will do everything within their means to ensure that they are hounded out promptly. I have been hounded from job to job, and am now so psychologically injured that I do not want to work again. One day, I promise, karma will hit these putrid filth, and all they will have left to attack will be each other, for all the good people will have gone. That day cannot come soon enough.

[@999timepass]

I thought it was just me bro. Thank you for sharing your experience. Stay strong. I am already worried about my son, who is just 15.

[@ericanicole9202]

what a nice video

[@beneaththesurface5327]

Well someone called me names at workplace and was teasing me so i called him i jelled at him i got very very angry i even called him out for a fight he never spoke to me again. This is the best way to solve situation like this with low life humans like these. It works and only spent 2 days thinking about this… i prefer the aggressive approach

[@ericanicole9202]

nice video

[@annajakubowski8192]

I was physically pinned against a wall at work by a new manager. I myself am a new employee and I have experienced intimidation, exclusion, stress induced anxiety and an impingement in my should and pectoral all because my new manager was quote en quote just joking

[@MJ-gm7km]

I really hope you are okay! That sound like sexual harassment or at least harassment or assault. Have you reported the manager?

[@Burnthatlife]

SO why they did???

[@saltywisdom]

👍

[@shirleykean3937]

Confront the Bullies. They are cowards. Cannot fight BUT I can.

[@deeannawindsor6319]

Bullies in workplace and cyber bullies or any other bully has been or is being mentally abused somewhere in their life.Pray to God To forgive them As for them they need to try missionary of God counselling attend church regular and get saved by the Lord Jesus Christ.Revenge is Gods job not yours

[@NoName-qc3ms]

I disagree on the claim that the target/victim (In workplace) feels like a failure.

[@holaburger6075]

Lol

[@cherrylow9818]

Is it really bullying or just weak sensitive thin skinned lazy employees unable to cope?

[@lamzy3773]

That sounds like something a bully would say but can't take it.