Why Gay Relationships Are So Hard

[@Jimmerca]

I’ve been with my husband for nearly 40 years through all the ups and downs, but I wouldn’t change a thing. We met the old-fashioned way in a gay club 🌈♥️

[@zoren1900]

30 is not old, it's still very young. Great video! ❤

[@dextertanggana2192]

Hi

[@garyinpalmsprings]

The issues BEGINS with a lack of sexual - emotional growth at puberty as little Gay boys learn to hide who they are. it stunts growth. A lot of normal feelings, unrealistic romance and 'teen attractions' that we should be experiencing at ages 12-18 are hidden away, often in shame. Then when the Gay boy becomes a late teen - early 20's and wants to "date", the boy - man is functioning at a state of arrested development of about age 12. AND so the "dating process" begins with a series of screw-ups, bad choices, childish searches for romance while trying to establish a career. REMEMBER that dating for sex is SO easy. The right 'hook-up' device or in the olden days, the right Bar, the right 'look' and off to the bedroom we go! THEN about age 32 as the bodies change and energies slow, priorities change, with little relationship skills developed, the man turns toward his career, his furnishings, his house, his travels, his poodles and more china and crystal. He becomes more selfish and the City of Palm Springs is FULL of single selfish really attractive older men who become as tight in their wallets as their asses from non-use. He may reach out, but now he is no longer the 'hot stud of 22', rather an aging retired super-stud that simply has no concept of 'RELATING and GIVING' in a connection with an other man, despite years of psychological counseling of which they all have participated. NOW, their is HOPE, it's slim, but it begins with NO SEX. Just conversation (DAYTIME ONLY OVER COFFEE) no cocktails. Talk and no action. TEST the company for emotional availability. LISTEN with your heart. Speak honestly. No games. No hidden agenda. AND become friends. WITH the idea that this FRIEND may not be the perfect 'sexual type', but might just be imperfect husband material. Take your time. AND no sex until some form of commitment has been promised. AND ALL the above is JUST for starters!

[@Mcfreddo]

Oh! Oh! Oh! Couldn't agree more!

[@Bazroshan]

Aha! Now that's the kind of open, realistic, practical psychology we need, not the closed, arrogant pseudo-psychology of the conversion camp!

[@McMilesE]

HAHAHA. Yes! You are correct! So much of our corruption is from hating ourselves and hiding ourselves for so long

[@garyinpalmsprings]

@@McMilesE While I did enjoy Dylan St. Gabriel's post here, I have learned that I need to stop commenting as while my hopefully thought-provoking ideas on VERY rare occasions solicits responses, and almost never does the actual poster, in this case Dylan offer a response. I am not here for responses, but this is a interesting topic. If posters want 'likes' and subscribers, I suggest the respect to comment when a reader spends time to comment. I need unsubscribe and delete. Good luck.

[@jrbs]

For too many gays, it's all about sex rather than loving relationships.

[@andychester]

spot on

[@bobbyc1120]

@@jrbs Fearful-avoidant attachment has entered the chat.

[@joshuarock4631]

Nothing wrong with just an nice hook up

[@joshuarock4631]

@@bobbyc1120100% I love casual Hook ups and me and my partner enjoy it , it’s been 13 years

[@marvel-uppermoon]

​@@joshuarock4631😂 let me just laugh at ur comment and move on.

[@thomassears1432]

It’s been my experience that there are two types of gay men, excitement seekers and home builders. Home builders are more likely to stay together after the honeymoon stage is over. You become something more than just sexual attraction and begin to really build a life together. I speak from experience. My husband and I have been together 32+ years. We live together in the country and haven’t been in a gay bar or club since the night we meet in 1992.

[@nichill7474]

I used to be about excitement and it got boring and empty. But with age comes wisdom and house building is my highest priority.

[@cityguyusa]

I believe it's a problem of not being able to navigate a relationship and like you said because of how we were brought up. Not being able to have relationships at a young age teaches many of us that we are not loveable or wothy and that we shouldn't expect to be loved or touched. This isn't at what I'd call a consious level. That leads to a need for being touched but it doesn't matter who touches us just someone and if they have a great body that gives us some sense of self-worth because we judge ourselves by who's willing to touch us. That's why there's so much promiscuity.

[@michaelballlenger7614]

Dylan I have to tell you that approaching 30 and being in your thirties is a fantastic time. For a gay man to be in a permanent long-term relationship in his late teens and twenties is a rare thing that it lasts. When my husband and I met I was 29 and he was 31. We were together for 42 years before he passed at Christmas in 2021. Our relationship was monogamous, loving and comfortable. But I knew that life was not over for me and that I had loved to give. In 2023 I met a really nice guy, and physically we are like two 25 year olds. But we are also very comfortable with each other, almost like we have known each other for a very long time. So do not lament about being 30 and single and worried about dating because I always say nothing happens before its time. Be happy with who you are and just go on and enjoy life, you deserve it.

[@lawrenceharris7369]

I particularly love this response. It lets me there is hope for me.❤

[@Michael-ur5qb]

I agree with this. I think so many gay men are emotionally immature in their 20s cause in a lot of ways they are getting a late start. I really feel bad for the younger gays in their 20s. I do think it’s better for this generation but the learning curve is steep

[@bhrigurajsinghchauhan9154]

I'm into 30's too but I don't have anyone🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

[@michaelballlenger7614]

Just remember that nothing happens before it's time.

[@kennethAmos8929]

Gay people have to high expectations for perfection, instead of seaking pure happiness

[@genespell4340]

If you find love you won't see imperfections.

[@Mrl9591]

Happiness is a fleeting emotion, only fools chase it. A relationship has both good n bad times, people lack commitment so they're unable to ever achieve anything meaningful long term. My partner n I have been dating for almost 10years and it's been great. Don't look for happiness, look for commitment and ability to stick with someone through thick and thin

[@bobbyc1120]

@@kennethAmos8929 Gee I wonder why

[@Stephenrsm7600]

Dylan, I LOVE your channel!!! You are so open & honest. I appreciate your view points. You hit the nail on the head with your comments!!! Yes, we as gay men need to be nicer to each other. So many of us have been hurt in relationships, by family members, and by each other!! Bless you, Dylan for saying on your platform that many, I am sure, would say if we had a following.

[@brianborchardt7198]

My husband and I met 22 years ago this weekend and we've married for almost 10. I believe too many guys have unrealistic expectations and put up artificial barriers. And may I add, we are 100% monogamous.

[@jaxstuff898]

Gay dating sucks, and not in the good way. Thank you as always for being so open and sharing, gives us all hope :)

[@thomasgriffith2953]

Dylan, everything you have experienced and (hopefully) learned has been preparing you for tomorrow. You don't know who will come into your life but preparation is half the battle when opportunity knocks ... the universe works in mysterious ways ... good luck to you 💓🤗💓

[@Ozmni11]

I live in Chicago and the gay community here is brutal! It’s really hard to make friends here because it’s true, you are expected to look like a fashion model.

[@genespell4340]

Those people are nuts. Most of us have imperfections. Sometimes I tell people that I am pathetic when naked when they ask how I am.

[@p.rabbitt4914]

Hey- I live in Chicago too! And agree.. it is so hard to make friends esp if you want more than "sex" & want deeper meaning & purpose. Still not sure how to resolve this, but I keep trying.

[@Ozmni11]

@@p.rabbitt4914 Good for you! I keep trying as well. I just want friends not sex or marriage. Relationships are a different search 😄😄

[@ICgay4]

I am in Philly, it's even worse here I rather be in Chicago

[@greenbeans575]

30 is the prime of your life! Live in the moment and enjoy your 30's!

[@joehammond2586]

This is a very fair assessment of current gay life. I can't remember a time when it was any different.

[@Matt_H2O]

Love your insights and advice Dylan. How I wish there were more like minded men like you in this world. Its struggle street when it comes to dating. Especially as we get older and it gets harder to maintain the perceived perfect body image. 💖🏳‍🌈

[@georgeduncan3596]

My God Dylan, you’re such at heart such a beautiful, wise soul - 💓🙏🏻

[@jimvrabel520]

Dylan I just loved this video!! Dating in the gay community is definitely non-existent.....try being a 57 yr old gay man that's overweight and trying to find true love in a monogamous relationship and hopefully one day a husband.

[@Kenneth-p6j]

Dating is a mission to date and find a relationship. Hook ups is not dating. If your just logging in for sex and to do hook ups then expect to be lonely and alone. Many gay men do want a relationship not just hook ups.

[@Michael-ur5qb]

That’s true but I think there are a fair bit that are just emotionally unprepared even if they desperately want a connection. It’s hard to know how a relationship is supposed to function when you haven’t been in one or around a healthy gay relationship.

[@em4227]

A lot of gay men don't really want to have relationships it's just not ingrained in us but that's even okay you got to get a partner that you guys are in sync with how you're going to meet other guys and what are the rules That's what it is we need to be honest with each other and quit trying to act like we're going to marry somebody and have a monogamous relationship for the rest of our lives. Every gay man on here knows the truth

[@davidwoodford1814]

Thanks for putting into words what I have been thinking. I entered the gay dating scene in 2015 after being in a faithful marriage for 14 years. I was horrified by Grindr and turned to Tinder instead. I had some success but it’s a challenge.

[@MetFan37]

You have to understand one thing: Religion and Homosexuality DO NOT MIX. If there is a God (which I personally do not subscribe to) I would imagine that He would love us ALL, just as we are. There will always be judgemental people, but loving yourself should always come first, and don't let the negativity in. If you're getting what you need inside a relationship, there's absolutely NO REASON to stray. People, for whatever reason, are always looking over the fence. There's an old saying (which is also a song title): Don't Let the Green Grass Fool You. People always think the grass is greener on the other side, and can't allow themselves to be happy with what they've got. But if you've got love, support, and great sex all in one beautiful package, why mess that up?

[@KingDomfaithlifecoaching]

I agree that relationships between the LGBTQ+ community maybe more difficult to navigate than our hetero counterparts because of the trauma and abuse and fear and miseducation that we have had to endure. I believe that all people, but especially those of us in the LGBTQ+ community actually sit down with ourselves and work through that trauma and fear, and the resulting jealousy, or attachment issues, etc. that might negatively affect an otherwise stable relationship. But there are studies indicating that gay relationships are, on average, somewhere as stable or even slightly more than straight relationships. Remember that what you are living and feeling may not be what is globally the case. And if you are getting your info from IG or some other social media, it is likely to be skewed. There has been this rising resentment on social media from the younger generation concerning sexual liberation and "monogamy vs. polygamy". Please remember that the gay community is no more sexually promiscuous than our heterosexual male counterparts. There is an article written by The Guardian on exactly this topic. If you are 'seeing' all these gay people have sex, it is because it's what is being shown to you (National Institute of Health study on 'The Effect of the Promiscuity Stereotype on Opposition to Gay Rights'). By and large, according to the research, gay men and straight men are just as promiscuous and also just as likely to establish a monogamous relationship. It depends on the individual, not the collective community.

[@em4227]

Wow I think your analysis is very good but when you saying that gay men aren't necessarily more promiscuous but I think they are when you have four testicles in the family things are just different I mean it's just obvious it's different. And in Europe I think they're much more mature about sexuality or male sexuality having mistresses is common in Europe and Europe has far less divorce than we do here in the US so go figure that one out. But again we're just different and we need to acknowledge that and if you want to have a monogamous relationship with a man you should want that and get it it's just going to be a little bit harder but they're out there obviously not every man is the same but most of us do think alike let's be honest 😈💪😁

[@marckid93]

Idc how “heteronormative” it is, I like monogamous.

[@Bullthighs]

Same and I don't care what the h*es say

[@aristoblack6067]

Just want to note, as a person who has dated a two people “in the closet” to varying degrees the issue was not that their family didn’t accept them and me, but how my PARTNER behaved because of that. For instance, I would date someone whose parents died in a car crash and are not available for me to interact with. It’s not about not being able to be a big happy family, it’s about someone dragging you back into the closet with them. We should be able to be a NORMAL couple (post on social media together, hold hands walking down the street, spend holidays together, etc.). If your family is unavailable (for whatever reason be it homophobia, being dead, etc.) that’s fine but you have to behave as such. This isn’t really about being gay either. Any person should honor their relationship (regardless of gender). If your family won’t let me over for Christmas, then the discomfort would come from you going there without me, not from me not being with your family for Christmas. If any person doesn’t accept your partner (for any unreasonable reason be it sexual orientation, class, race, etc.) you need to limit your interaction with them and ultimately choose your partner, otherwise most of your relationships will fail (would you even want to date someone who would put up with that??). I want to date the kind of man who has so much respect for himself he wouldn’t be around homophobic family members (homophobia is wrong). You need the attitude of “I spend Christmas with my partner, period.” I know it’s easier said than done but it’s your family’s fault for putting you in that situation (sorry). It’s your fault, however, for not meeting the moment and rejecting bad behavior. That’s a part of being an adult. It’s not about being liked but doing the right thing! I would also say there’s nothing about being gay that makes you more biologically predisposed to being non monogamous (at least nothing that has been proven scientifically).

[@bennylane9701]

A decent Gay Man who gets on Grindr won't stay on there. The Best leave it to the rest.

[@kharikhy-ree2242]

Good point. I attempted a few times, but it's not my crowd.

[@mhollick63]

Married for 35 years. Never used grindr.

[@em4227]

But I bet you guys have three ways or outside sex of your relationship The odds are you did which is fine who cares your men if it works for you it works and you guys are still together that's great

[@jefftate1981]

Life is way simpler single, just wish I'd have realized it in my 20s. It would have saved a lot of heart ache....... Cheers from Australia.

[@kewcraig]

HI Dylan ~ First of all, I want to let you know I'm deaf but can speak and hear well with hearing aids. I had a relationship in the past, my last relationship in 2021 for 5 years, and now single for 3 years, and YES it's hard to find someone ~ all they want is sex nothing more. I WANT MORE than sex! crazy people out there I'm sure you are going through the same thing with guys you chat with! you seem a nice guy ~ you are not getting old 30 still young and beautiful ~ I'm about to be 60 next month :) but I don't look 60 many people think I look in my 40s I'm flattered :) I don't know if you ever met a deaf person before. Davey from New York :) have a good day DYLAN ! :)

[@phillipsmith7759]

Wishing you well!!! 😊😊😊

[@kernow9324]

Hi Davey, one of the nicest dates I had was with a deaf guy (London). His lipreading was so good I used to forget he was deaf. I would have loved for the relationship to develop, but I discovered he was still in a relationship, albeit wanting to leave. Naughty. He used to call me through the text relay operator, but I was too inhibited, knowing someone was typing my words. I'm sure they've heard it all before, but I found it difficult. I've been happily married the last 25 years but he still pops into my mind occasionally and I wonder what he's doing. I hope he's happy and well. Wishing you love and happiness from the UK.

[@kewcraig]

@@kernow9324 ~ Very sweet :)

[@billlee536]

You are smarter than you think !! Trust your instincts

[@tyronesmith4622]

So true!! I like your accent btw I’m English so it sounds different but nice haha

[@JasonKelly-m6s]

Believe me it is HARD TO DATE AND FIND A REAL MAN, everyone out there is playing games, i cant tell you how many times i have had my heart crushed cause the guy i was dating turned out to be playing nothing but games, You dont know what i would give to find Mr Right, Because long story short about 6 months ago me and my boyfriend of 4 years broke up and that still kills me because i was planning on asking him to marry me

[@Bullthighs]

Ohh that's so sad 😢

[@talvahoussel9730]

You are an inspiration! I love your accent! Born and raised here in Tennessee, and yet that kind of accent is rare even here! Best wishes to you, Dylan!!

[@tomvanderschilden6636]

I've been in a gay relationship for 10 years. We are monogamous. It's wonderful!

[@Christianofl0w]

I love your youtube so much I've been watching it all week You have been through some times For real. As a gay christian myself. I really respect admire & appreciate your upfront direct energy & love hearing your accent. Blessed to find you Have a beautiful weekend

[@candor_xo]

Dylan its your choice who you date, not your families! if anything they should respect your choices...

[@airmykii4090]

…. If I was to date you .. I would NEVER let you go!!! 🥰🥰🥰… seriously tho I’ve been saying this for the longest time I gave up the apps a few years ago because it just was never serving me beneficially .. I’ve enjoyed my solo time thus far without all that pressure for attention and acceptance.. and I have no wants to return to those apps I’d rather meet my future husband in a regular old fashioned way then I feel like it’ll be more genuine less superficial and longer lasting

[@bobbyc1120]

Getting past the honeymoon phase is very hard when it's all you've known. When you spent your entire life shoving your feelings into a corner and then experience the rush of new love, it's hard not to read into its disappearance.

[@OLDS98]

Well stated Dylan. You put a lot of thought went into this video. It is the drama and issues that makes people so tired in the community. I know about those apps. I never used them and have no desire to do so. The dating world is no joke in the gay community. I was never successful with it years ago after dealing with the many aspects. I have not bothered or tried in years. I just enjoy listening and watching the channel.

[@davidpp330]

I agree with you Dylan. I was with my wife for 18 years, my first gay relationship lasted 15 years. It’s been 9 years of loneliness since. No I’m not an old man! I met my wife when I was a teenager. I live alone. Don’t have a social life. The loneliness and my broken heart are too much to take. I honestly do not see a future.

[@genespell4340]

You have to break out of the rut you have put yourself in. Do you say hello to people in the grocery store, the hardware store or any other places. Do you do any volunteer work? Put yourself out there and proceed cautiously.

[@Anne-za]

💔 I hope you find what you need.

[@em4227]

Well you can be a happy guy by not trying to predicate your relationship but like her wives we're different and you could have buddies and really good friends or maybe you'll find that guy that you're with the rest of your life and you guys choose you guys want to live your life together

[@PossibleBat]

Karma for wasting 18 YEARS for that poor woman. I hope she knew before and both of you agreed to it, otherwise, absolutely horrid. Nightmare fuel.

[@p.rabbitt4914]

I agree with you- I want things to get better. HOW can the gay community advance, as you mention, esp when it doesnt seem it wants to? I want to be a part of our evolution ✨️

[@Christian-eb9nt]

For a person of faith I think it important to try to find another man who is also a person of faith. The best relationships are those that include God. I wish we had a gay Christians club or meeting place.

[@adambohlin5112]

You hit the head of the nail there, when I came out as gay 1983 it was hard HIV had just come into the scene, we did not get payed equal wages, it was still considered a mental disorder, we were forced tested by doctors and the police for HIV and if you did not you lost your right to have a bank account, and a solicitor had to approve every purchase and much much more horrible things. BUT since we did not have the cell phones no internet and all the clubs that had been open during the 70s were closed, we had to take care of each other and all that died in AIDS we the Friends had to pay for for in 99% of the cases the family would not have that shame in church, and many times our friends did not even had a priest at the funeral. We were not as hung up with age, looks, fashion, race, upbringing circumstances, we could not be that selective for we had very few options. This is the communist/lefty/globalist/socialist Sweden I am talking about. So we learned how to talk face to face in RL something I find today both straight and gay youth are really really bad at today and yes for me 40 years and younger are youth to me HEHE, over 50 now myself. There is nothing better to go out and meet a person in RL, because everyone can be a supermodel on the dating apps, mega rich etc etc. I also find many younger people today are very self absorbed and despite all the rights they have that my generation fought for sometimes with their life as the sacrifice. The only two places you could be truly free was Amsterdam/Holland and Copenhagen, Denmark, Sweden was a living hell. We also learned that everyone comes with issues of their own and to be more tolerant to the faults that we all harbour and you can´t hide them in RL just on the net. I have had the same boyfriend since 1992 we met at a meeting for aquarist enthusiasts, (fresh water fish) a hobby and now also a living for us still today, we found common ground in that more than our looks or background, income etc. Today when I speak to younger gay guys most of them are sad in their souls and I see that as they are trying to fill the void with superficial stuff. I should if I were you not try so hard looking for your man and spend your time with a hobby where you can meet people RL. What is the worst thing that could happen ....oh you might come home with a guppy or two instead of your dream guy....that time....but then when you least expect it he will be there with that special fish you want to buy at the local auction within your field of hobby (fish, cars, antiques) and you will have so so much more to share then with each other not just at bedtime!, Cheers Adam from somewhere in the world (not Sweden ofc).

[@Spicy_neurospicy]

Your accent is so melodious!

[@sonnysideup570]

Hello Mr Dylan I just stumbled on your site and have been listening to your channel I'm a senior and was in my relationship for 36 years unfortunately I lost the love of my life due to cancer I have never been on any dating app don't plan to now I have been widow for 6 years now Yes family is very important and religious beliefs are very important Like you I converted to Catholic and attended RICA classes You will find someone and I truly believe the Lord will put you in touch with the person of your love Have a blessed Labor day weekend From my home in Texas to your home

[@blatinomermann]

5:25 you werent allowed or you didnt bc they werent content with committing to you and your life? Therapy is so necessary man i stg. Ive been single for six years and dating is okay and so are hookups but the step and urge to be in a relationship is stronger despite the outcome not meeting my standards. And im a homebody but satisfied with when i do things i never did when i was in a relationship. For example, i never been to NY pride with any partner. A year i went alone and hung out with an allie after was a great enough feeling. And idk my type anymore. It was just a default to who wanted me. My standards are high but very realistic. Just no one wants to do any of it and no one wants to request anything from me because i come off as so rigid but im not when i am in love. 😊💕

[@noodleppoodle]

What a glorious accent

[@InsatiableBankable37]

I'm 38 years old and have not ever been in a relationship and that's fine; It'll happen when it's meant to happen and I'm OK with that. I made peace with time.

[@geraldniles9582]

Where are you from? - Arkansas?! I didn't know anyone really speaks in that manner! But your comments are spot-on! Unfortunately, none of it matters in the long run! Jerry of San Diego

[@DavidWeilandjr.]

I had no idea my comment would be seen everywhere here. I’m fine with that bc I don’t like censorship of anything I say. You have all the things I want in a person to build a life with on this ugly earth. Just wanted to say I am comfortable saying how I feel And what I see. You are sooo much want I would desire to live out the rest of my earthly life. I pray you see this .. or someone who can identify with these deep involved words bc they are true and want to have a life existence with me. I need it. I do !

[@timothyj1966]

Such a good looking, grounded young Man. WOW. Wishing you ALL GOOD THINGS this Autumn!

[@adminofsugas]

I think it’s become sad as so many don’t want to work anymore for something special. It’s literally an addiction imo. Each person has to draw their own line tho when it comes to dating or the apps

[@davidwoodford1814]

Thanks for sharing. Very thought provoking 😮

[@Seabasstien]

Enjoyed your video Dylan. It made me remember the one relationship I had that was probably the healthiest was a guy who was honest that he was polyamorous but he was very much in love with me. He was very sexually experienced and I've always been on the monogamous, romantic side. It was kind of sexy and exciting dating such an honest nasty boy😂

[@nomebear]

A good way to meet other gay prospects is to join one or more of the little theater groups in the south. I've met the creme de la creme of availabe southern men by being involved. If you don't act, build sets, fund raise, help with auctions, and I promise you'll meet someone special.

[@MM-fq9gi]

Both of my X's spent time in prison for their life choices after we parted and died young. Never did Grindr, why would anyone want to sleep with someone that has zero degrees of separation from every other person doing the same in the community.

[@robertdmusic]

Liking your videos - keep them coming :)

[@MrNemitri]

Dating in this day an age is more challenging due to the (percieved) abundance of people, this also plagues the straight community as well, no one is save, everyone is looking for the next best thing.

[@ayogrey]

It's quite interesting seeing a lot of gay men coming to this realization. Unfortunately, the breadcrumbs have been here from jump. Males have never really been held to any form of accountability in interpersonal relationships by society where as the female gender has been forced to constantly change/evolve since pretty much the dawn of time. This repetition has rendered the female gender pretty "adaptable". Given the pattern created by heterosexual males, they're generally not really emotionally available, communicative, or the "committed" type and sadly for the male there generally isn't really a "reward" for these behaviors whereas a woman would receive a "reward" (e.g. relationship, marriage, children, a home, etc.) Fast forward centuries later, males still aren't held accountable and now evolution has included gay men, which are still biological "men" so that pattern/behavior continues. No accountability, no reward: the behavior continues. When you look at the pattern like this it's quite easy to understand how things started and where things end. If males whether gay or straight, want these connections it truly is up to the male gender to foster such an environment for their fellow males. Two men dating makes the situation a bit more complicated. No drama, no strings, just simplicity. 🤙🏽

[@em4227]

I like it when he says yeah I don't mean a very visual creatures and he gets a little smirk on his face That's great accepted dude you know find a partner who's going to think like you and you guys have a good time together or whatever it is quit trying to pretend something is not what it is two males together are different than two lesbians lesbians tend to have more committed relationships than men do That's a fact

[@terryz935]

I'm jealous of you, Dylan. Three relationships by the time you're 30. I'm 77 and have never been in long-term relationship. Oh sure, I've had boyfriends but those have never lasted more than a month or two.

[@Spook1234-e8i]

I just use Grindr to simply check out and read profiles. No I don't send messages or reply to any. But im a single senior retired and a cat dad, sure I get bored occasionally.

[@troyharvey1459]

Been single for almost 2 years I am taking my time for myself I believe I will find someone down the road

[@benjaminvella2736]

Gay dating is like this song. Tanya Tucker --- If it don't come easy. 😮 I'm sure Dylan can relate to that tune.

[@flilguy]

Yeah, I dated this one guy and he was mad at me because I went to church with my family. Basically, he wanted me to alienate my family. I didn't go every Sunday and I didn't like his attitude. He had to work that morning so why would it matter.

[@joshuarock4631]

I’m gay im young been with my partner for 13 years im 34 now, take a look inside first i dont know you but narcissistic traits are real and they push people away

[@joedavenport5293]

Don't get me started on the racism and internalized homophobia in the gay community

[@maxx7970]

What an accent. Houston we have a problem lol 😂 ❤

[@ernestguzman4962]

it's difficult NOT to be polyamorous when you have so many alluring temptations around 😜

[@michaelrg3836]

Relationships, imo, are entirely about compromise. In fact, try down dating - you might be pleasantly surprised.

[@jim9520]

Great video.

[@gerawallstar3487]

Theres another thing about gay dating and when it comes to gay dating apps: despite all of the options out there in thr gay community, chances of actually even having a conversation with people on there is slim. Too many people get ghosted in a hearbeat on there which causes more issues in the gay dating world.

[@LtR2264]

I love your voice😍

[@truerthanyouknow9456]

It's giving... twunk otter with with Harvest Moon Wolf rising.

[@PhilipWeisman-dl4ik]

At 72 l find that more and more gay men want rationships but the haven't a clue how to express their feings without huge drama scenes, rather than quiet conversations. Everyone arrives with baggage. And a boyfriend is not a restoration project .... like a house. There is work and compromise and compassion and forgiveness and then comes love. There is no instant relationship formula or everyone would be paired up. Everyone knows that counseling is a useful tool but they never opt to know if they know how to have a supportive compassionate relationship

[@shakawalker9921]

😅 I'm always good and most of the time good when I'm in a bottom relationship. Verse or Top not so much. It always come with trouble especially when I project. 😅 I'm scared too Top now especially when my man says he's the man in the relationship now even we both started as verse but he Topped me the whole time.

[@reuterromain1054]

Is that the miraculous medal you are wearing there?

[@marcuscarana9240]

Cause we're only 3 percent of the population. Ask a random person out on a date, you only have 3 percent of a probability he has the dame orientation, and then there's maybe a 33 percent chance he'll say yes. So you have 1 percent chances but asking someone out randomly. That's why most boyfriends find their boyfriends at gay bars where gay men are concentrated even though straight guys oftne go there as well just to have other guys check them out for fun.

[@bhrigurajsinghchauhan9154]

Please help me I'm going through worst yo worst🙏🥺

[@Mcfreddo]

The Christopher Hitchens quote is: "Religion poisons everything!"

[@p.rabbitt4914]

Wrong: misappkied religion does that. Applied correctly, it leads us to the deepest truth.

[@Mcfreddo]

@@p.rabbitt4914 😅😂🤣🤣 Funny upon the time ranges (dependence upon the religious severity,) required to drag it into the current knowledge base understanding of the times and therefore acceptance? Keep in mind, everything that can't be shown to be true, nor shown to be untrue; are the hallmarks of everything that doesn't exist. Science is the only way forward and note, the existence of a thing, means no other can stand in for it's reality. The cold doesn't exist, it only is the absence of heat. The dark doesn't exist, it only is the absence of light.

[@TucsonBott]

Yeah I have been looking for a gay Christian republican cowboy but it is hard to find anyone that would like to be in a relationship but they are just trying to hookup and move on to the next guy 🤦🏼‍♂️.

[@zeroling7690]

I'm physically disabled and it's lonely at times

[@Bullthighs]

What's your disability?

[@AliAhmed-s2k5s]

I'm in Toronto as a visitor ..wondering how to find a proper man for me as My King

[@MM-fq9gi]

Yes gay men can be mean but not as bad as lesbian relationships where many begin and end with a uhaul truck.

[@tradingonlygold3508]

it's not hard but the opposite trying to be bulid the wall up and trying to be play the game in relationship up by himself and no sincare or be honest even

[@TheHeatInColorPodcast]

30 aint old and you hardly look it, handsome

[@em4227]

What this really is about is that we have to define who we are and there's too much heteronormative relationships that we're trying to be we're not hetero they're different when you have four testicles in your family things are just different it's not worse or better it's just different and we got to deal with that and quit trying to pretend like we're heteronormative. Just like with a ski marriage it seems like it's gone south now they're trying to get transgendered now they're trying to get crossdressers now they're trying to get on and on and on and it's crazy and straight people are getting upset now because it's just gone too far. And let's face it a lot of gay relationships are open or if they're not one's playing around and the other one isn't or they're both doing it and they both think they're not doing it and you just got to be open with each other guys come on. And quit trying to pretend like where straight people or not you have a woman in the equation and things are just different but even straight men cheat far more than straight women do. Go figure this isn't rocket science we should accept ourselves who we are and go forward and quit trying to pretend we're something we're not 💪😀

[@jimmywhite3922]

Dude, I'm from SC. Columbia area. Would love to meet and talk. I'm from the days we had to meet in bars.. Would like to talk to you in a Big Brother way. It would be fun to compare notes on these MAN issues.

[@rayworsham5982]

Your handsome I'm from the south too

[@leonstevens1382]

Throughout history novels and plays are filled with straight infidelity. This is not a gay phenomenon.

[@enriquerodriguezjr4466]

Not just heterosexual are difficult to look for relationship?

[@Shenron466]

Dating is easy when you are a gay white man . Which isnt the same for gay men who come from migrant famillies like myself.

[@thor-cj9dh]

You're 30, and I'm curious, where do you see yourself at 40?

[@KeithAlmond-j7r]

You need to move here to la get outta that repressed south that’s what I did.

[@vietnamemperor123461]

You gotten skinnier since the last time I saw you. Are you ok? You look very tired and need some rest.

[@vaylon1701]

My family was pretty much like yours. Evangelical and very judgemental. But 41 years ago I met my husband and had to make a choice. So after a few years I just let them know where I stood and that I wasn't going to just sit back and listen to stuff quietly any more. The first couple of years was very odd. My family tried all kinds of tricks to break us up. But eventually many of them came around and began to respect us as a couple. Those that didn't were forgotten and ignored. But you got to have somebody in your life that you know has your back always. Now that I am much older, the cheating stuff we were raised with as kids is no reason to breakup with someone you love. Just don't let it become a habit. This is true of gay or straight relationships. I learned that woman will cheat faster than any man will. I said it before, you remind me so much of my hubby all those years ago. Your accent and everything. Don't give up bud. Somewhere out there is a heart like yours just waiting to be found.

[@ErikaF-e9n]

Why not stay pure for real?

[@ArloKnudsenFit]

Way to scare everyone away from dating. Good job.

[@theomartin7339]

Gay relationships are hard because they're based on lust. Walk away from sin now.

[@greenbeans575]

It's not your duty to judge other people. Worry about your own business.

[@theomartin7339]

@greenbeans575 judge? Oh, I'm just speaking facts!!!

[@theomartin7339]

@@greenbeans575 you know it's all about lust! It's all exterior. It's sexual. That's it. So I'll keep speaking facts and if you don't like it oh well. Deal with it.

[@theomartin7339]

@@greenbeans575 sticking a penis inside of an anus is gross. That's where waste comes out of. Walk away from that filthy behavior.

[@Kenneth-p6j]

Your too negative. Negative thinking destroys dreams. Yes dating is hard but keep in mind there are many lonely guys out there and yes its possible to meet a decent guy. Change your thoughts from negative to positive. Replace self defeating thoughts like "I cant find a boyfriend" to "I can find a boyfriend" and "I have a wonderful boyfriend" when you put out those positive thoughts you replace bad thoughts with good ones and start to materialize your desires. It starts in your mind. Read Power of Positive Thinking as this law of thoughts affect every aspect of your life not just your quest to find a boyfriend. Have faith and a positive attitude.

[@themagickalmermaid]

Please don't call him negative. No, he's giving his experiences.

[@bennylane9701]

When you meet a "boyfriend" on Grindr and start out with sex, in no time at all you and your new boyfriend are right back on Grindr, only this time there's two of you "looking" for a third. Go figure.

[@Kenneth-p6j]

​@@bennylane9701its a case by case situation. You DO have quality men that go into grindr. Not all are hook ups, some are looking for stability.

[@Kenneth-p6j]

​@@themagickalmermaidHe is being a bit negative because he is addressing his personal hangups onto his audience. He should also reinforce the part that is positive aspect. I feel a message of hope should also be transmitted not just personal hang ups.

[@marks4708]

He’s being realistic, it’s not negativity

[@ColinGarner-h1t]

Nothings up ! Why ask ?

[@Timotimo101]

It's a greeting.

[@josephsf2452]

If you believe something is hard, the Universe will demonstrate the difficulty. Stop telling yourself it's hard.

[@bobbyc1120]

The universe doesn't demonstrate anything. It just is. Everyone has their own way of making sense of things. Sometimes, telling yourself something is hard is a way to prepare for what needs to be done to succeed. Other times, it's a license to try something different.

[@josephsf2452]

@@bobbyc1120 whatever you're telling yourself is creating your reality. When you say the Universe doesn't demonstrate anything, that simply is not true. Reality is a mirror of what you're thinking and feeling, the Universe knows what you want and where it is through the path of least resistance.

[@bobbyc1120]

@@josephsf2452 I understand where you're coming from, but the universe can't actually "know" anything either. Any "universal knowledge" you find is just your interpretation.