Why I Left the ExMuslim Community: Things to Consider Before Joining

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[@stevekhan9987]

A lot of these ex-muslims you speak of. Want to blame Islam for there attitudes and the way they are. Not taking responsibility for their own behaviour. In reality it had nothing to do with Islam in the first place it was just them. Rotten to the core

[@meggieqin8496]

50:20 wow somebody else mentioned it too! unfortunately its true ,many stays misogonystic and sexist even after leaving Islam, its a common pattern in most people, because its deeper than just leaving a religion ,its part of the culture

[@ymaysernameuay1113]

"You can't make it in the exmuslim community" Lol these ppl really think the ex-muslim community hollywood or something. Really goes to show it's all about money for them.

[@mozillafirefay]

It's so gross. Like they make youtube videos and act like this behind the scenes, and then want to be treated like they're David Attenborough or something.

[@bbalpha4921]

As I muslim I respect your decision to leave islam bro. Atleast you aren't doing it for $$$

[@pb2712]

@@bbalpha4921 and i as an ex muslim respect muslims who arent doing it for $$$.

[@team1275]

Welcome back! Looking forward to your livestream soon when feel better.

[@PacisEritVobiscum]

Seeing the hurt in your face..hearing it in your voice, I wanted to reach out and give you a hug across the screen 😥😢. Just know that as time passes on...wounds will heal or get much better. Wishing you the best...and you are beautiful in my eyes. You are not "fat". You are voluptuous, which is a good thing in my home country of Nigeria.

[@mrsapostate]

Sending positive vibes to you, Fay! 🥰 You are gorgeous! You are strong! You are independent! Stay grounded and true to yourself. Peace and love to you 😘

[@mozillafirefay]

💖

[@user-gm2gx4yg2v]

Your husband AP is losing views and is about to become irrelevant soon 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@sorguvasfen2426]

@@user-gm2gx4yg2v Islam will be irrelevant soon as the world becomes more civilised.

[@saraha4636]

You give me strength to embrace my stride thankyou for being you

[@kyrak.4143]

I just finished crying and this made me cry again.

[@mozillafirefay]

Sorry x

[@marcouno4118]

Was worried about you as you have not posted for a while. Glad you’re still with us but sorry to see you hurt. Sorry, just caught the last bit. Remember, you can choose your friends but not your family. I guess that you don’t owe anyone anything. As time goes by, you will find yourself and then learn where and with who you belong. Part of living is making mistakes but you’ll learn from them and will be much the better for it. Hope you feel happier soon and take care.

[@mozillafirefay]

I've actually been really okay, i been working and studying. I recently got a promotion and a new contract actually. I just needed to get everything that I needed to say about this out so that I could close the book on it.

[@marcouno4118]

Pleased to hear that. It’s good to sound off in times like these - very therapeutic! Good that you’ve been immersing yourself in your work. It will give you opportunities to meet different people. When you get to know someone, just ask yourself - do they enrich your life? That will help you decide if they’re worth the effort. Good luck with your studies. It will make you respect yourself more and is a great way of improving yourself.

[@mozillafirefay]

@@marcouno4118 I'm so ready to pass the shit out of this degree because it's so out of my comfort zone but I am determined to see it through.

[@ibrahimmahadfarah7510]

You brought up so many good points especially in regards to the BLM debate, person who shall not be named had no grasp at the basic concept yet choose to participate in the debate without even during a cursory research.

[@mozillafirefay]

It is truly disgusting that basic civil rights are willfully misunderstood by people who would suffer greatly without them.

[@scaryjoker]

Name and shame who cares

[@SumuduVNagodavithana]

You comes off as someone who is extremely loyal and I believe your friends are lucky to have you.

[@Shirwa]

Positive vibes only from now on. you said everything we wanted to say🥰🥰

[@messianicapostate3557]

Hi Fay. I just watched your video and it left me with a very heavy heart. Many of the things you said was very heart breaking, and I know how it feels to be gaslighted and manipulated. I myself have experienced abuse from a narcissistic person and there are few things I hate more than gaslighting. I’ve learned a lot from watching your video and I commend you for be willing to criticise the ex-Muslim community and expose the problems within it. I always sensed that there were problems, but I never knew that the problems got THIS bad. I respect the work Harris Sultan is doing, I have personally always found Harris Sultan as a person to be a little bit suspect. Sometimes people aren’t always consistent with their morals and we have to be cautious. Ex-Muslims are not perfect and should not be viewed as role models. I really respect Abdullah Sameer and I’m good friends with him because I love the work he has been doing, but if he has done something wrong, it would be dishonest of me for me to avoid admitting that he’s done something wrong. This isn’t to say that all the good things he has done are meaningless, credit has to go where credit is due, but he’s not perfect and his bad choices should be treated independently of his good choices. FYI: I am an ex-Muslim Christian who doesn’t believe in the Trinity and eternal hellfire. I went from being a Sunni Muslim to a Unitarian Christian. Most ex-Muslims are Atheists, ex-Muslim Christians are nowhere near as numerous as ex-Muslim Atheists. As an ex-Muslim who is still a theist, I have always felt a bit awkward that almost all ex-Muslims I have spoken to are Atheists and would probably think I went from an evil and harmful belief to a less evil and harmful belief, but I can accept this and perfectly fine with this. I disagree with such sentiments, but everyone is entitled to their own views as long as they don’t incite harm on others. I am a fringe figure in the ex-Muslim community and that’s not necessarily a bad thing because it shows how great individualism can be. In another video of yours, Hassan Radwan made this excellent comment about the ex-Muslim community: **btw I was going to say “Ex-Muslim movement” but in reality there is no such thing. There are just Ex-Muslims and we are all different. The only thing we all have in common is that we left Islam. Ex-Muslims are - of course - like any other people - we have a huge variety of views, politics, sympathies, personalities, maturity, interests, spirituality, expertise, philosophies etc…)”** Hassan hit the nail on head when he said this. Ex-Muslims in general do not have as much in common as one would expect. Ex-Muslim Atheists have differing views with respect to politics, sympathies, personalities, maturity, interests, spirituality, expertise, philosophies and so on. Ex-Muslim Christians like me have a different religious world view from ex-Muslim Atheists on top of all that! As an ex-Muslim Christian, I am a lot more familiar with the problems with Christians who are involved in anti-Islamic polemics than the problems with the ex-Muslim community, and do not get me started on the problems with the Christians that participate in anti-Islamic polemics. The fact that the ex-Muslim community has had problems THIS severe is shocking to me. I am not just a fringe individual in the ex-Muslim community by virtue of being a Christian rather than Atheist, I am also a fringe individual in the Christian community by virtue of being a Unitarian and I believe in annihilationism i.e. that the souls of the unsaved are destroyed in hell and cease to exist, rather than suffering eternal conscious torment in hellfire. So I am not going to be that popular in the ex-Muslim community or Christian community. I have a few videos on my own channel that you can check them if you’re interested. I only have a few videos so far, but my style and approach is very different than other people who criticise Islam. I am planning on learning from the mistakes that have been made by ex-Muslim figures and Christian polemicists, and your video has been very helpful for me to recognise the mistakes that ex-Muslim figures have made, and I will try to avoid making these mistakes myself. That’s pretty much all I have to say. I hope you have a great day and wish you good healing.

[@mozillafirefay]

Thank you for your comment. As much as I appreciate your perspective and your transparency, I do have to say that I was working with a lot of these figures that you respect and unfortunately they present themselves very differently in private as compared to their public personas. I don't necessarily think that I need to explain in explicit detail, because I don't have any intentions to drive you away from their content necessarily, especially if you gain some benefit from it, but many of these figures do what they do for ill-intent and I have even faced harassment and abuse from the hands of some. As for the community/movement discussion, I don't think that community or movements need to be monolithic or have peoples who are extremely similar for them to be a community. Definitively, the thing that binds us as ExMuslims and makes us a community or a movement is a shared experience that we have with Islam - to greater or lesser degrees. Islam and our experience with it is something every former Muslime identifies with and that makes us a community. The denial of this very evident fact has been used to denounce and derail legitimate criticism of the community in the past, so please forgive me for my insistence on this point. Additionally, within the movement, many figureheads share similar opinions and similar audiences and often these aren't necessarily the best takes or audiences. As someone who identifies heavily with social progress and left-leaning politics - I was quite often shunned and bullied for progressive views I had about trans people, about my desire to engage with religious people in productive discourse and about issues regarding racial disparity. But anyway, thank you for watching the video and again for your insight ❤

[@messianicapostate3557]

@@mozillafirefay Fair enough. My experiences with ex-Muslim figures is different and I am not going to invalidate your experiences. That introvertedsmiles guy was especially crazy, he converted back to Islam and he’s still an a nutcase. I always thought he sucked. The only ex-Muslim figure I highly respect is Abdullah Sameer, but I am not going to deny that he has his faults. The rest of the figure you mentioned, I don’t really respect them that much in the first place. Also when I was quoting Hassan Radwan on the ex-Muslim movement not being a real movement, I didn’t think that deeply about what constitutes a movement whilst writing my comment and was just thinking more about the diversity of ex-Muslims, so I will concede on your point on this.

[@trustyapeco]

This chick is straight up Amazing. Only idiots disagree with me. 🤗🤗🤗

[@danieljayaprakash1610]

U r a wonderful person

[@ymaysernameuay1113]

I left too! Islam and Muslims already wasted a lot of my life. Talking shit about it certainly won't end it, so I'm not going to let it take more of me. I blocked a lot of keywords related to Islam on Twitter.

[@mozillafirefay]

I did the exact same. I'm so tired of all the bullshit, fakeness and toxicity.

[@rachellsmithson4485]

Islam is the true religion and your all naive about islam cuz you didnt get basic teaching about islam

[@ouioui4953]

@@rachellsmithson4485 Why then it is so difficult to leave your religion ?

[@faizan5090]

I've always found your perspective to be a sensible, if angry, one. Atheism-leaning agnostic here in Cambridge who was contemplating joining the community but didn't out of laziness + misalignment. The exmuslim community raises some really good issues and problems with islam and practising muslims but i often find it coming across as cult-ish and clique-y. Additionally it seems like an identity one needs to grow out of with age and maturity? Identifying oneself as "exmuslim" for years on end sounds like a limiting fixation, and I can see that sometimes when I see members on social media - they just don't Also, you're not ugly! You look gorgeous here.

[@faizan5090]

they just don't evolve beyond their anger with islam and identification with being exmuslim!*

[@faizan5090]

ALSO. While your family may have turned out right in anticipating the community abandoning you, it was likely scare tactics to tow you back into line that, coincidentally, turned out go be right.

[@faizan5090]

"fayyyy, are you taking your medication?" omygosh gaslighting is exactly what i thought of when you narrated that. pretty shitty, along with the other issues you discussed (a lot to get into)

[@mozillafirefay]

@@faizan5090 Thank you 🖤

[@wannabehistorian371]

It’s basically just a strain of militant atheism, really. No one likes those fedora-tilting stereotypical Redditors who go on about how delusional Christians are or whatever, and base their entire identity around such. If ex-Muslims were a much bigger group, and Islam in general wasn’t something with so much other political baggage bound up with it in the English speaking world, I think they’d have a very similar reputation.

[@Deluluissolulumadman]

The problem is not just with the Ex-muslim community. There is a significant amount of bigotry and insensitivity in the wider new atheist movement.

[@mozillafirefay]

I agree. The wider New Atheist Movement has been quite hostile and insensitive to progressive ideals. Bit strange for a bunch of people that should despise conservatism in general.

[@derickfester2111]

Fabulous

[@satin.satsuma]

Im not surprised about Harris. Even from watching his videos I get a bad vibe. The way he speaks to people when he interviews them is cold. I sincerely hope that Nuriyah is not one of the bad ones because she comes across as lovely and empathetic in her videos :(...but given that she is close with Harris...im starting to have doubts.

[@mozillafirefay]

I don't have a lot of faith in Nuriyah, especially in the last few months with the Palestinian Genocide.

[@sassymedea3065]

Whne you were talking about white priveldge someone on the life chat immediately started talking about wilberforce as a counter argument what's funny is that wilberforce used his white priveldge to speak on behalf of the slaves who were not taken as seriously due to their race. Great video btw.

[@mozillafirefay]

White saviourism is so widespread, and doesn't actually help much in the way of autonomy and actually listening to what people who are marginalised have to say.

[@MASTERROSHIdb]

I see you as a tran woman can't have peace in this community. It's sad that they treat you like this, but seriously you need to get some help ASAP.

[@ThisIsMissCheeky]

She’s not trans

[@pb2712]

Around 54:00 you mentioned an ex muslim whos a parent and justifies child abuse. Whos that? Can you mention his name? So that he can be confronted about it and avoided.

[@mozillafirefay]

It's Halima Salat.

[@lesscringeymapperdude]

the exmuslim community compares mohammad to hitler. downplaying hitler to the extreme

[@maessof91]

I remembr watching that blm stream, yeah, think i remember that person saying some strait up racist stuff. Similar stuff went down on a local group, They insisted JK was not a transphobe😂. progressive-islam iv been looking at recently honestly seems like a better reddit to these people.

[@danieljayaprakash1610]

Be ur own, dont go by shat others speak abt u

[@team1275]

I disagree about colonialism.

[@danieljayaprakash1610]

I like you

[@ZGoddessLola]

Cancel culture sucks girl. Love you

[@danieljayaprakash1610]

I see u very beautiful, awesome and an honest and smart human

[@thebaka234]

I dissagree on some point all in all you got good points. By the way you are not ugly girl you fine 😉.

[@zavarxavier4753]

Exmuslim here, support and love you.

[@mozillafirefay]

🖤

[@rachellsmithson4485]

Your whole career is based on islam. Just stop talking about it and go live your life

[@mozillafirefay]

? That would imply that the majority of my money or time has been spent on this. I literally spent a year and made many 80£ on adsense. Do your research before making blanket statements 🖤

[@rachellsmithson4485]

@@mozillafirefay Just stop defaming islam and go on your way without misleading people

[@mozillafirefay]

@@rachellsmithson4485 I studied Islam for upwards of 11 years. I'm not "misleading" anybody.

[@NeoLegendX]

@@mozillafirefay Interesting. You say 11 years. Would you answer a few questions?

[@ThisIsMissCheeky]

@@rachellsmithson4485 what do you get out of defending Islam? Do your own research and find out how everything people say when criticising Islam is 100% true. You’re just refusing to find out the truth and instead choosing to silence those who’ve experienced all the worst parts of Islam.

[@ohlookitsbryan]

Skip the first 10 minutes. You’re welcome.

[@VintageInvicta]

Not really like the colours on you’re fase. To much red or orange. 😅 But about you’re videos. You’re free to do what you like. If you don’t like for some reasons the ex Muslims movement it’s free to share you’re opinion. So you can share you’re stories about other people. Share you’re experiences. But on the other side, they can share their side of the story about you. They can’t like what you are saying and maybe you don’t like what other people are saying about you.