why i love gatekeeping fashion (am i just a b***?)

[@alex9190]

when everyone dresses the same irl it reminds me of my old sims saves where i was really obsessed with certain jeans or tops and would put every sim in the same outfit just different color variations

[@LainiOzark]

HAHAHA I LOVE THIS

[@carmenbaby]

Same with the get famous pack where you can have a celebrity trait that has all the townies copy your look 💀 I hated that

[@miyalol1862]

@@carmenbaby yess😭

[@TimeQuxxn]

HAHAHAHAHS actually laughed out lod cuz SAME

[@silh3345]

I did that too! Back when I only had a limited amount of packs I used to dress all my sims (especially the male sims) in the same two or three jeans and a plain T-shirt or sweater.

[@veronica-xd3ci]

People really stay wanting their products spoon fed to them, my favorite example I’ve seen on Pinterest was a pic with a vase and some dried flowers in it: “Where are the flowers from?” “the Earth”

[@LainiOzark]

HAHAHAHA

[@silh3345]

I always find it funny when I see people on Pinterest ask “where’s the top from” and it’s literally a plain black or white T-shirt

[@vickymoreno3977]

Pinterest comments can be infuriating. "What aesthetic is this??" under a fruits magazine street snap

[@icecold0098]

OMG THISSS

[@mkim4091]

@@vickymoreno3977 🤣🤣🤣

[@Ari-uc9je]

Agreed. These people sharing these “dupes” are sharing Amazon fashion, under the pretense that it’s “better” when it’s all crappy fast fashion at the end of the day.

[@Ari-uc9je]

Or sharing the relisation par “dupe” from Amazon when it’s a rip off of the original small business owners design, time, hard work and labor …

[@keeptaiwanfree]

yeah they share dupes from amazon or shein, as if they’re not just cheap chinese manufacturers who steal designs from ACTUAL fashion designers. oh my god. it makes me angry.

[@anairam1247]

And they get commission from those Amazon links. They don't link those items to do anyone a favor but themselves

[@laurascottcary]

you bring up such an interesting point about what tiktok specifically has done for consumer culture. i’ve had ppl on tiktok call me a gatekeeper for saying an item was thrifted instead of going to my closet, finding the piece, reading the label, and responding with the exact brand!!! i think the internet has spoiled us by giving us instant access to so much info and now we feel entitled enough to pester people we don’t know for details as small as the label on their top

[@LainiOzark]

!!!!!

[@CE98]

thats so bizarre. you're doing them a favor telling them where its from and they not only demand an answer but they ostracize you if you don't do it "correctly". Social media has lost all form of friendliness- just tell me where to shop and then shutup.

[@starcrossedknits]

yes i swear the entitlement is off the charts! people honestly want to trade their time for yours, and somehow feel entitled to it. i make knitting content and get a bunch of messages on insta/tiktok asking for help with random knitting techniques (not even stuff i've posted about, they're just asking me because they can see that i knit) and i've honestly stopped answering most of them because a) people can literally just google and spend 10 min looking through the answers vs expecting a random stranger to spend their time writing them an answer, and b) the number of times i don't even get a "thank you" is just UNREAL. i can't imagine feeling so entitled to someone's time and effort and not even saying thank you. definitely feels like a culture shift that's grown lately

[@carleymills322]

Totally agree!

[@corneliastreets]

The funny thing is that a lot of creators actually go the extra mile to go “Thrifted - [Brand] on label” but whenever their thrift finds literally have no labels, I’ve seen people complain that they could’ve tried looking it up online to link. Why don’t YOU try looking for it??? Like???

[@Loveerta]

I cannot express how the Pinterest comments boil my blood. On a celeb pic from the 90s some idiot will say "where can I find this dress, trousers, top etc" like bro...in Kate Moss's wardrobe archives?? They will ask where plain white tees are from for gods sake. I'm all about gatekeeping, if you're too dumb to do the search, you don't deserve it 😂

[@chaaaargh]

exactly 😭 this and "what's the aesthetic?"

[@veve7349]

I think it's lazyness tbh. People ask me about vintage pieces that took me forever to find and that I taylor or restore myself. They want the style without putting in time and effort. Fast fashion makes people think that theres a quick link to everything. I find it a little rude sometimes honestly, I'm not somebody's unpaid personal shopper.

[@ryeofoatmeal]

damn true 💀 like it just a damn basic jacket yet they're asking where is it from kzksjsn

[@no.reply_]

Yes, they think everything is available and that they can click and get it the same day. Where's the joy in copying an entire outfit that you might not really like

[@CE98]

or theyll say its from shein, as if shein is an actual store and not just a mass manufacturer and makes everything that circulates even a little bit on social media

[@iluvzevon]

I was hesitant but “if gatekeeping makes people shop less…” convinced me you’re right. Everyone has to have the exact thing only for it to be out of style in a few weeks and then it gets donated somewhere or put in a landfill. It’s wild!

[@bettydraper2034]

this is exactly what got me to agree too.

[@hamilcross]

nah she literally just used that as justification for her to be stuck up lmfao but y'all will eat anything up ig

[@bettydraper2034]

@@hamilcross and u know this how? u know her personally? u know her true nature?

[@Gh0ulsin]

@@hamilcross you must be one of those people who asks where someone’s basic black shirt is from. Sit down

[@sophia8992]

@@hamilcross if you like fashion do the research urself it’s that simple 😭

[@kaylaf.a620]

Congrats on the birth of your daughter! Could you do a video on unpopular fashion opinions when it comes to dressing children? Looking forward to more videos from you this year, you’ve been doing amazing!💜

[@199X-y3v]

i love this idea

[@weenusfranklin2752]

Yes please!

[@kawawawawas]

Laini teaching basic critical thinking skills 💅🏼

[@emilymcatee6518]

factsss

[@keeptaiwanfree]

something the internet generation needs dearly

[@woahfully2982]

lmfao 😭

[@FrederikkeBroekner]

for me it's the entitlement... they expect you to constantly be online, spending every minute of your time responding to every comment asking for a link or the brand. I love when influencers share new and fun brands, obviously, but it's 100% a choice. But if an influencer doesn't want to share a brand, then i 100% get that. As an influencer it most also be hard to constantly be copied. I know it's the job of an influencer to 'influence', but when someone wears a super cool unique outfit and not only does the follower/subscriber take inspiration of it, but suddenly ff brands start to copy it... that must suck.

[@dorisdelonga3713]

Shein….

[@sophia2406k]

You were so real for this, a large part of why I love thrifting is bc I can just tell people I don't know and it isn't a lie LOL

[@niarenee8318]

LOL same but then I lowkey feel like they think I’m lying 💀

[@els2231]

@@niarenee8318 YUP lol. the “sorry it’s thrifted” excuse be making me feel so guilty sometimes ! like am i a bitch for not going to look at the tag for u… or is it even worth it to share

[@chrysantheimum]

Yes, for all the reasons listed. I also hate when people accuse others of gatekeeping because let's be real...Everyone does it. If it's not with fashion, people will gatekeep anything else they "consume." For example, music. Everybody has that one song/artist they loved before it became an overplayed tiktok audio. Gatekeeping is people's way of keeping things special to them still special. That's really not a crime, as long as you aren't mean about it. Also, there's a noticeable difference between commenting an insincere "link???" on everything and showing a genuine interest in the style (which usually involves first looking into it yourself anyway).

[@LainiOzark]

Couldn’t agree more

[@hamilcross]

I mean, no, not everyone does it, but whatever helps you sleep at night lmao

[@emilydavies9943]

I recently deleted Tik Tok because I felt like my FYP became one giant ad for clothing, "dupes", and other stuff I don't need. I kept seeing the same items over and over, and even though I knew the trend would die out in a couple months (i.e, the platform uggs), I still felt a pressure to buy the OG uggs or find a dupe. I'm hoping that I'll be able to find my own sense of style again this year without the influence of Tik Tok and other social media. Great video Laini and congratulations on your baby girl!

[@goldyblob]

Good!!

[@talyahrachel]

I deleted my tiktok and other social medias awhile ago and I promise you what you’re hoping for will come. Besides occasional Pinterest or KZbinr inspo, I found myself generally gravitating towards things that I genuinely like and find myself wearing over and over and then mixing with fresh thrifted or store finds that make my wardrobe ME, not an amalgamation of ads that were forcefed to me by algorithms. You will find your style and it will feel so good

[@rowceo]

@@talyahrachel yes exactly! life slows down so much & it feels great.

[@Killjoy_Mel]

So I see that the 'dont give a f*ck' thing you mentioned experiencing in one video you made during the 1st half of your pregnancy continues. That is absolutely fantastic. I really enjoy the polite assertiveness and no-nonsense, yet never rude content you've been making for many months now. You're articulate, sharp, solid. Keep keeping those gates where gatekeeping is needed!

[@carinaconnecting]

i love this comment

[@els2231]

yes!

[@sophiakalish]

in response to unsubscribers... the truth hurts..and its really applaudable as a fashion influencer to guide us in the right direction. it's like you aren't gatekeeping gatekeeping. Wanting your followers to be on the same page as you on this is the ultimate sign of respect and support.

[@millenarsc]

i also kinda like gatekeeping because i think everyone nowadays kind of dresses the same, even within certain niches or aesthetics! like why do you want that specific thing, can’t you just use it as a reference and buy something similar? 😗

[@tamara10]

Seeing a clothing item on a screen and immediately being ready to buy is insane to me

[@keiona2545]

There is nothing wrong with gatekeeping in my opinion. I think it’s so much better to feel individual and unique, your style is such a large form of self expression. Is it wrong to gatekeep with friends? I have had more than a few friends who want to get the same exact pieces as me and I tell them but often times I’m like “why did I tell them? They are going to copy me” I don’t want the negative reaction if I’m not honest but I had vintage pants from the 70s and my friend searched high and low for ones similar and even down to jewelry. It became overwhelming to be asked constantly about pieces so I stopped telling her altogether because I felt like what was part of personal self expression was being duplicated too often

[@veve7349]

I get it 😒 I had a friend like this and sometimes she'd even replicate my outfit spontaneously when I came to pick her up for a night out or something and I didn't want to say anything because it just felt stupid and immature tbh. Or it would just happen by chance because she bought the exact same items that I had or very similar stuff. And then we'd be walking around practically dressed as twins and I just felt silly about outfits I was initially excited about and took time to curate. Matching looks could have been fun I guess but I would have liked to be involved in the decision and go about it in a more subtle, interesting way. I haven't thought about this in years 😅 weird memory

[@keiona2545]

@@veve7349 Oh this would drive me crazy! I 100% agree it’s almost as bad when a friend says “oh let’s dress casual” and they show up dressed to the nines 😂

[@isadewdew]

i have friends like this, who even buy the exact same peices as me and it bothers me so now i have become a gatekeeper too 😅

[@hamilcross]

sorry but do you genuinely think you're some sort of visionary to the point that you're afraid to share where your shit is from because it's just SO unique and SO exclusively yours? lmao this just reeks of insecurity. who gives a fuck if your friend wants the same piece as you? you are not the only person that's ever bought it, you won't be the last, and you will certainly never be the best to rock it. lmfao

[@keiona2545]

@@hamilcross I said in the op that style is about self expression and individualism. The issue isn’t wearing the same piece as someone and nor do I think or say in the op that I’m better than someone or will wear something better. I personally feel everyone should have their own style and pieces that they enjoy because it feels true to them not because they see someone else wear it because I genuinely get things that bring joy to me not things I see others wear because news flash just like fast fashion once it’s no longer trendy it’s considered trash but those things can be minimized if people find pieces that are important to them but because of your response to my comment and your eagerness to misunderstand I will just say I hope you have a good day 🙂 Also something that does scream insecurity is a stranger insulting another person they don’t know on the internet who was simply voicing their own opinion and experience with the topic at hand.

[@ccheychey]

The best moment is when you find something at the thrift you’ve been searching months or even longer for, and just happen to come across it 💕

[@kat-pac9930]

Ive been accidentally gatekeeping because I thrift everything and cut the tags off cuz Theyre itchy. Literally cannot tell anyone where they can get my clothes.

[@LainiOzark]

Subconscious gate keeping ✅🫡

[@karli4074]

literally someone was like i hate when someone says “it’s thrifted” when i ask where it’s from cuz it has a tag! … but i’ve literally bought cute things that have zero tag on them ahah

[@agatamazur9810]

I hunt for quality rather than brand so I have loads of British noname wool and cashmere clothes. When someone asks I have "you wouldn't get it" moment And I am literally the opposite of a gatekeeper

[@annw7843]

I’ve never heard of gatekeeping in terms of not sharing links. Usually when I hear about gatekeeping in fashion it’s about turning away people of color or fat people from certain trends. So I was kinda relieved by your actual content.

[@stinks_mom]

also a reminder that you can enjoy and love a piece of clothing or accessories without ever purchasing it!

[@LainiOzark]

!!!!

[@piptig5327]

1000%!! We can appreciate trends and styles without always participating! People correlate their consumption of products so much with their identity

[@thegillmachine]

The way people expect influencers to share every little detail of everything they wear ever is just ASTOUNDING and it often comes off very obnoxious and entitled when they demand that info. If I was an influencer, I would hate linking everyrhing all the time. It would make me feel like I was just a marketing tactic and my whole purpose was to sell clothes and it would kill me

[@professionalamateur741]

This video made sense! And your daughter was not distracting. The best thing you can do if you love fashion, I think, is to be a little on the outside of the fashion community. It’s kind of the other side of gatekeeping, I just don’t really seek out what other people wear and instead look for inspiration in how to play around with what I already have. That way your style is really yours!

[@abbyfountain2788]

I have never relayed to a video MORE IN MY LIFE. I am on the never-ending hunt for good pairs of jeans. I look EVERY TIME I go thrifting, and when you find that pair that matches the silhouette you’re going for (not the exact pair, but the SHAPE), best feeling ever. Also, recently I was looking for some cooler alternative to the Ugg minis because they feel kind of basic to me, and I found a slipper for $20 that is a similar vibe but they look way different (quilted in top and the color is different), and someone asked me if they were The North Face slippers. NOTHING better in the world than looking good and finding clothes that match the vibe you want without just buying the exact same item as everyone else.

[@mauve9266]

I agree generally with a lot of the points made but I do think it’s easy to get really wrapped up in being special and unique in a way that’s actually deleterious for the gatekeeper themselves. I’ve had friends who if u wore a similar item of clothing to them they’d have this mini freak out cos their sense of self was so wrapped up in their style. I think not gatekeeping at times (at least on a smaller scale) can help ppl feel liberated from the need to be unique to this extent

[@mauve9266]

@Pamela Falls I hope it didn’t come across like I was advocating it being mandatory to always tell people where your clothes are from 😅 I just think if you’re someone who struggles with some sort of overwhelming pressure to feel unique and that being linked to the way you dress, it can be helpful to adopt a more open approach like amongst a smaller group of people E.g. friends

[@amberlikehoney]

I had a friend in high school who was like this. One day we wore the same top and she literally asked me to go home and change - and when I didnt told me I looked ugly in the top. Wild!!!

[@hamilcross]

that's literally what this whole video is... a stuck up influencer scared someone's gonna de-throne her and her oh so unique style LMFAO like you literally can't say with your full chest that this is totally normal behavior

[@stepahead5944]

Gatekeeping doesn't necessarily reduce consumption. Part of intentional and thoughtful consumption is finding the exact item you're looking for over time. Someone may have found it. I end up consuming much more trying to guess or dupe the exact one item that I wanted all along. Also, the perspective expressed in the video seems to come from people who fit the market ideal. For those of us who might be different colors, sizes, etc. Until VERY recently it was impossible to find a "nude" in my skintone. By default that was pinkish tan color. Even now I can't participate in the winter tight trend bc the thick tights aren't even sold in brown. When someone finds a back or there is finally a product for people neglected by companies/marketing, sharing is the best thing that marginalized people can do. We can't speak with our dollars if we don't even know that things exist or how to get them. This is even more the case bc a lot of these items are performative. How many companies finally came out with brown bras, etc. and have already discontinued the products? It means we can be stuck trying to get our hands on items that won't even be brought into the permanent line. Gatekeeping isn't always the solution. Now, how or when we ask is a different topic (I'm referring to your tiktok examples).

[@Edible_Kittens]

Extremely good points.

[@em6644]

I guess there’s always the option to freeze like I used to in the mid-late 2010s 💀 I was dedicated to my miniskirts

[@maggiemckay7895]

The thrill of the hunt is one of the most enjoyable parts of fashion. Narrowing down in exactly what you want, trying on ton of options and not settling, randomly finally finding the perfect leather jacket on a Thursday afternoon in July… yeah I’d take that any day.

[@laurieellis2050]

this reminds me when I saw hand knit sweaters from a girl selling them go viral on tiktok and I wanted one so bad but everytime I went to her online shop, they were sold out even five mins after she restocked so months later I was still thinking about the sweaters so I learned how to make them myself and now it means so much more to me than if I bought the same sweaters everyone else on tiktok has. Mine are different and unique :)

[@AnotherWhovian]

Thank u for articulating this! I suppose the trend cycle has always worked this way, but it definitely feels like the "tiktokification" of consumerism has made things even more of a frenzy. I think young people are especially vulnerable to getting swept up in hopping on one link/product, with the desire to fit in etc. Also, your point about feeling relief when something is out of stock is so relatable - do I actually like it or do I like the instant gratification? Another great vid Laini/Lucy!

[@giuliaborgogni2460]

gatekeeping is giving the possibility to create something new, i feel like we need it more

[@kellyalexa1437]

love this perspective!

[@alwaysbllusshing]

“Yes I’m sad I don’t have them but…I’ll get over it” I cracked up. So true, it’s just clothes.

[@MissChabre]

I keep seeing people asking for a specific item in Instagram posts even though the influencer tags their outfits in every post, and it makes me go "Please put some effort into looking for that specific item??" Like come on. But yeah at first I was a little wary of this video's title, but you make such good points! I guess it's because I was thinking of gatekeeping in the video game/comic book space, where gatekeeping is toxic af.

[@LainiOzark]

Yes! And I’m still worried about the title hahaha, mostly because I only know gatekeeping in fashion (and really only on social media fashion) so it’s not that deep and just kind of silly! Thanks for hearing me out

[@isalewis722]

I also feel like sometimes people ask for links from people that are specifically anti consumerism or something, like this makeup influencer isn’t going to link to that specific brush because you probably already have something similar but a lot of people don’t know that’s like the North Star of their content or whatever. I totally feels what your saying about like community gate keeping tho, I feel like gatekeeping an identity or a hobby is insidious in the way the gatekeeping like a nonessential commodity just is not… idk

[@Mptropical]

It’s so funny that you mentioned this because it just reminded me that years ago (might still be) this was such an issue under Matilda Djerf’s posts. She would tag everything and ppl still asked non-stop that she would have to address it on stories or on the post. Insanity

[@adelinamemeti4075]

“I love to shart on myself” don’t we all Laini don’t we all Also the little Lucy noises were absolutely adorable

[@alexisgraham2383]

ie: Issa Rae posted a group photo over the summer and she was wearing this BEAUTIFUL dress. I checked all the tags on posts of posts, searched throughout insta and finally found the designer. I scrolled until I found the dress on their page- so I could get the name. Then, got their contact information and had one of my friends inquire on whats app (bc i dont have the app/account) for the price/availability. I've done this so many times for v specific pieces- sometimes I'm successful, sometimes I'm not. But I love the hunt and thrill of looking for items.

[@taanomi]

We are all so oversaturated with items that we constantly feel the need to over consume. Like someone else in the comments said: you can appreciate an item and love it, without owning it. I enjoyed that criticism of consumerism and its relationship to the fast changing trend circles. I personally would always feel fine with sharing where I get my items from but i am not internet famous and therefor I dont feel I promote overconsumption. I feel like that you, Laini, found a good way to bring sustainable fashion closer to a lot of people to show how to do irl and online thrifting, and also by rewearing outfits and showing the same items over and over in your videos. I love that! If I buy an item, I dont only style it once, I want to wear the crap out of it in every way possible.

[@meggzwrld]

Laini you are soooo real for speaking on instant gratification!!! Convenience in our culture has become so crazy, and it has made us super impatient to an insane extent. I agree with you 100% about the thrill, and I think more of us (myself included) should learn how to be patient and take time when considering an item to buy.

[@gabzzzz2276]

I will say, I’m plus sized and have issues finding brands that can fit my size. So sometimes I want plus sized influencers to post so I have more options bc the world ain’t for me sis

[@user-iz3ss5rb3z]

Good point maybe try mentioning that if you ask someone where it’s from, yk like saying what’s the brand for plus sized stuff?

[@madison_brooke]

The thrill of the hunt is the BEST! I’ve been searching for the perfect slip dress for over a year (I’m very picky lol) and I finally found it on eBay! I almost cried when I won the auction 😂

[@katef1384]

Love this!! U articulated a frustration I (sometimes) have with influencer culture but couldn't put into words.

[@katef1384]

Also you look stunning 🥰🥰

[@hannahcross2078]

I’ve started knitting my own clothes so that I know it’s what I rlly want because why would I spend HOURS on something I hated ! Also no one can copy it exactly

[@hyaacinthus]

I’ve been a long time viewer but I rarely comment, I just want to say that all the content that you have been putting out lately resonates so much with me rn, even the things that I don’t completely agree on I find myself thinking about it later on and slowly agreeing with you. Kudos to you for making so much content while you were pregnant and even after giving birth! Also love the hair and the make up on this video!

[@amberlikehoney]

This is the tea!!! I agree with everything you said 100%. Searching and shopping around for unique and specific pieces part of the thrill!

[@ashleynichole8687]

I’m a part of the plus size community, and our options for cute, accessible clothing is very slim. So when I see a plus size creator showing off their cute outfit, sometimes I’ve gotta ask, because despite months/years of searching, I just can’t find pieces I want in my size. I think there’s an appropriate time and place for asking, of course, but I think it’s silly to be upset if the main purpose of whatever media you just produced (tiktok, reel, photoshoot) was to show off an outfit, and people ask for details about it. Idk, just a different perspective.

[@weenusfranklin2752]

She went over that there’s a time and a place for it, with the “dog dying” part if you were paying attention.

[@alexianizhny8804]

@@weenusfranklin2752 why is ur is so rude for no reason 😭

[@AppleGummyWorm]

literally same to everything you said! i've shopped like this for sooo many years and it kinda baffles me when people need everything to be linked.

[@aliciabeem9236]

The most annoying thing is going on pinterest and seeing three desperate people comment "where is it this from?" "where can I buy this?" on every single pin. Pinterest should be for inspo, not for shopping

[@toyaJM]

I sometimes answer these questions even though I don’t know the actual brand lol

[@merrymermaid]

@@toyaJM i’m going to start doing this haha

[@chloewagner]

I love helping people out with finding products (mostly on Pinterest and KZbin), it almost makes me feel like a detective, but there are certain times, where someone will be in the comments asking where something's from, and the answer is right at their fingertips (literally). For example, a pretty dress, and if you click on the picture, it leads you right to that product (and even if it doesn't, you could still search that website's dress category in hopes of finding that one dress). Or even, an influencer posting their different outfit videos, and they'll link their products *right* in the description, and you'll still find that one person waiting for you to give them the answers. There are certain times though, where I get frustrated, and I'm like, you know what, you're just going to have to find it yourselves!

[@k.2965]

These are really good points, Laini! You are always pushing me not to look blindly for particular same, trendy pieces. I’ve actually found myself being more cautious when it comes to buying clothes, I spend a looot of time searching for pieces. And it actually helped me with my shopping problem. Now I don’t want just A thing, I want THE thing 😊 I really do think a lot about particular piece and spend WEEKS on searching. It would be so much easier to just have a link, but I would have so much more stuff and I would feel overwhelmed and bored so quickly.

[@felicityirwin3275]

I agree with some of this however as a plus size person I have a different perspective on it. It’s genuinely near impossible to find certain items to dress the way I want to so if I see an influencer my size wearing something I love I will 100% ask where it’s from. It’s very different to a size 6 girl asking where a white T-shirt is from that they can literally find anywhere.

[@emilymcatee6518]

"get over it" - new motto for 2023 honestly

[@stellataylor492]

I never would have said I love gatekeeping before this (although I wouldn't say I was ever opposed to it) but this video has turned me into a gate keeping advocate lol

[@emilysaso3290]

This!! The whole culture around shaming people who “gatekeep” has never sat well with me or seemed to be a positive approach to fashion, love u for making this vid

[@tessalitzia8817]

i have to say i am shamelessly the "where is this __ from?" girl on pinterest, but pretty much never to go buy that exact item. it's a really fun part of the research process for me, and has helped me find a lot of cool small brands and go further down the rabbit holes of finding out who the top designers are right now, and why, and really analyzing the specific aspects of the products and designs! this vid is so good and refreshing as usual. you've totally shaped the way i approach my style and im so so grateful.

[@Snt2destroy]

I was skeptical about your stance from the title but as you explain I agree. Don’t expect people who did the work to just hand out information, go out and do the work yourself sometimes.

[@leonploszowski]

I feel you and I really think I don't have problem with clothes/fashion/overconsumption - I literally wear my fast fashion pieces for ages, but I have a problem with all of these trendy shoes because I want it all (and I am actually glad when they just don't fit on me, so I can move on and save money 😅)

[@hollyhhhh]

my best fashion advice is to have a mom or grandma with a fashion sense. i'm not even trying to gatekeep but my pieces are all 20+ years old so that's that. if this doesn't work, befriend your neighbour, help people move out, send letters to that aunt you never see. you get relationships, amazing clothing and the great stories that come with it.

[@jamieson4293]

this is so true. I have this one dress my mum gave me that she bought in her 20s. I have lost count of how many times I've been asked where I got it. People have even stopped me on the streets to ask! And it's always so nice to be able to tell the story that my mum bought it when she was overseas in her 20s and that she ended up keeping it so long to give it to me

[@chaneldeshawn]

I feel like tiktok has completely changed people's mindset on this topic. So many people on tiktok will ask questions(not just related to fashion) that could have easily been answered if they just used google or Pinterest or just common sense. I also love the effects you mentioned of gatekeeping

[@jackiebabe0326]

Indeed! I’m surprised how much people want to dress “the same” with others. I enjoy recreating style using my own items or find something similar. We don’t always need to “buy” new stuff.

[@ritiaggarwal995]

Honestly when you talked about hunting for something similar, I relate completely. I live in a different country from most of the fashion influencers I follow, so it’s not practical to shop from the brands they recommend. I always have to find something local and more affordable, it’s a great intersection between getting inspiration and finding my style.

[@backtoreads]

love the points you bought up!! totally with you on this, consumerism culture is actually in insane on tiktok and i’ve seen people literally harassed and almost crucified because they didn’t provide a link within 1hr. the person had to make a WHOLE other video explaining that they were busy and didn’t have time to provide a link

[@fondlyh]

I love the idea of not being able to buy a piece of clothing immediately (and I say this as a very impatient person) - as you said, if I am willing to wait so long for that one item it means I’m going to get my wear out of it and also the thrill of finally getting it is so worth the wait

[@baby.nay.]

Ok… irl only , I feel like real recognize real. I recently got asked my jacket brand and though my exact jacket was old , the guy immediately googled it and we dealt with a slight language barrier , but he was dressed so cool I thought I should help him out , and the genuine thanks and his interest made everything different . As an American… if I hadn’t discovered cool pieces and brands from other countries i don’t think my stilt would be so unique

[@michaelaliebman5129]

This speaks to me on so many levels! I got a long leather jacket on depop and it's the exact style and fit I'd been looking for for months and I feel like I'm still on such a high whenever I wear it 😂

[@anahernandezgonzalez7229]

I dont think gatekeeping is gona keep us from dressing the same, just the fact that if someone on pinterest goes viral for their outfits people just search every single piece on shein, and end up buying Shein dupes and amazon dupes.

[@agnesnathalie]

Loving this new mom energy lol! I also agree 100%

[@lenipauline]

girl you're make up is flawless

[@jojoindigo]

I always gatekeep… not because I don’t want to put people on… I DO! BUT my whole life people who are “cooler” than me steal my ideas or style. I just hate when people copy me. But I will always put my people on don’t get it twisted.

[@sydneygroenewold4678]

I would love to see a video dedicated to the outfits you put Lucy in!! Probably has better style than me😂

[@kendra555]

off topic bc i’m only like 30 seconds into the video but your skin/makeup looks AMAZING omg

[@KateCasper]

Laini I am SO WITH YOU with your last point. Often, when I like something and I see it’s sold out, I’m so relieved because it’s one less thing I feel I have to buy! I’ve pledged for years to not shop fast fashion with only a few exceptions (sometimes I do get my denim from Urban), and it’s saved my ass so many times with fashion trends. But even still, sometimes I’ll find a trend that was spearheaded by an indie fashion house or sustainable brand, and I’ll feel like I need it (like the House of Sunny Daybreaker Cardi), I’ll save up for it for a few months, and if I still like it, I’ll purchase it. Giving myself the time to discern is so helpful, although I do think the Daybreaker Cardi is not all it was cracked up to be (I bought it during 2020 and I’ve worn it maybe three times lol). I loved this video, I resonate so much!!

[@livgrace71]

Love what you said about the wait and hunt for items resulting in appreciating them more and for longer

[@KDbelieves]

I believe in gate keeping too. I hate how I'd like something and get judged for liking it. Then it goes viral and now everyone is doing it, then I'm seen as another girl following the crowd. I especially hate how trends destroys nice things. It sucks the life out of it. The threading thing will either sell out everywhere, go up in price, get formula changes, or it gets so overdone to the point where it's overdone and tacky. So I gate keep. I feel no guilt about it. A great example of this is the color grey. That was my favorite color. When I'd say it, people would say "eww, but grey is so boring and bland, and cold". I loved grey so much. I used to have a grey, black, and pink room. My room was so unique back then. All of a sudden, grey becomes a trend in interior design. Everywhere you look on pinterest. You see grey bedrooms, living rooms etc. Mow in 2023, grey is literally so dated. I myself can't stand the look of a grey themed room dispite it being my favorite color. I still love grey, but it looks dated.

[@pagethreemodel]

You have a point here.

[@poppyspinks9198]

really loving the honesty about style on your channel lately - its so refreshing

[@alyssadana5011]

Congrats on your daughter! So happy for you. I just adore you and your videos. Can you do a really colorful look book? Like mixing colors?

[@hammondesque]

I frickin loveeee "hater" Laini sm ♥♥

[@carmenbaby]

Where’s your baby from?

[@carmenbaby]

Not her gatekeeping her offspring 🙄

[@LainiOzark]

Omg so sorry, here’s the link!!! www.lainisbelly.com

[@carmenbaby]

@@LainiOzark tyy 🥰

[@user__1998]

lollll i could not agree more… people act like it’s a human right to have a particular product just automatically supplied to them. if I thrifted something or found it in an online marketplace, u can do the same thing yourself if you really want it. I gatekeep the main online marketplace website i use also bc i don’t want the prices to inflate rapidly like they do on more popular platforms like depop

[@sarahrodes3177]

Sharing a positive experience where someone gatekept something- became obsessed with the vibe of a crochet cardigan an influencer had and couldn’t find the link (like Laini, I don’t like to ask lol, she just didn’t have it tagged and probs thrifted it). I spent a long time searching on all the secondhand apps I have and most of the vintage cardis were pretty pricey- and though I would have gladly paid for the perfect one, the ones I was seeing weren’t quite “right”. Finally, after changing up my Poshmark keywords I found the PERFECT one for only $12 and let me tell you it was so satisfying! The seller just described it differently than I would have (beach cover up vs maxi cardigan) so I just had to try different things to find it.

[@rachelcorradi4230]

I luv this. Ppl asking where something is from also has given me the ick but I’ve been guilty of it too hehe- but ultimately it leads to more creativity 💜 u r an angel for showing us tips on how to search for things. I’m dumb & didn’t realize that’s how google images worked 😅

[@RachelLidya]

Honestly you become even more relatable ever since your pregnancy

[@bunnyandfawn]

YOU ARE SOOOOO real for this video omg.

[@endereverdeen]

not finished with the video yet but from where i’m at and looking at some comments, i think people are most concerned about scale. so on a friend to friend scale, or any smaller scale, i think generally people think asking where something is from is chill. and i think maybe a bit more could be said about scale and advertising as a part of social media (influencers?) sitting alongside posts from people that you know and how this ties to gatekeeping but i’m not gonna be the one to say it cos i’m sleepy. looking forward to the rest of the video!

[@endereverdeen]

(my take tho is i don’t care and don’t get why people are against saying where they got things. though, thinking about scale and whatnot, i think i can start to understand a bit more)

[@endereverdeen]

my username is an embarrassment i hate that youtube did this

[@kayagiorgione7346]

omg I leave YT for a min and come back to you with black hair, bangs, and a BABY. congratulations Laini🤍

[@katrinawellborn7663]

The worst thing to gate keep is MUSIC!!! 🎼🎵🎸It kills me when people do this, and won’t share the beat with us all! Ruby Lynn is a prime example. There have been numerous accounts of times I’ve watched her KZbin videos, found myself jammin to the background music, then went to the bottom to look for the song. She only tagged 2/5 songs played and the beat ones haven’t been disclosed. 😅. Can we not!!! Needless to say I do not watch her videos anymore - don’t gatekeep music, you’re not God

[@y.y.1414]

I really like the video essay format that you've been doing, I love to have them in the background! Thx Laini

[@Nina-wx3yg]

i agree 100% also ppl are soooo rude when someone doesnt respond to "outfit details?" comments right away. its like ppl expect to be told where to find everything instantly without any effort, something i find tiktok is really bad apart. everyone expects to be told what movies, books, fashion to like without taking the time to form their own opinions, find pieces etc.

[@vs-ej1qc]

a moment i’ll never forget is when on pinterest i saw a comment under a pic of an outfit saying “where can i get this shirt?” and it was a plain white tee. a plain white tee.

[@erinnugent]

Exactly!!! You’re not a bitch Laini, this video is so real and the way you’re so candid about stuff like this is the reason why I’m such a longtime subscriber. it’s so much more fun to find your own version of something you like! Tiktok is a hell scape for “gatekeeping” and other buzzwords lol. I saw a tiktok where a girl said where she got something in the caption and people were still commenting asking where it was from. I replied to one girl saying read the caption and she accused me of being rude to her ahahah. I also literally hate the overuse/misuse of the word dupe. It’ll be an Amazon knock off of something and people will be like “it’s a dupe”, no that product was made as a replica of the original product.

[@slakraze6288]

Your bangs and makeup are super cute!

[@simianec2502]

I agree with everything you said a 100%. Those comments feed into fast fashion, trends and overconsumption. If you like something you should take inspo from it not copy it

[@karmica7591]

I totally get the high of getting a piece after some time. To me it’s not only finding what I like but also having the money for said item cause I can’t buy things often, at all. But probably I enjoy more what I have now because I almost fight for it lol

[@stellasreadingagainohno]

laini can you make a video or post an insta story about what skincare you use? your skin always looks so good

[@LainiOzark]

It’s breast milk….😳😂

[@rebeccajones9757]

I like customizing my own clothes. There's no way to get exactly what I am wearing, but go ahead and try.

[@magnolia7810]

Thanks for stressing this! Atm I can't afford to buy brand new clothes and find it off-putting to see every single item in a post linked to a website. It just feels like an ad and makes me want to unfollow because I cannot relate and it reminder of my own very sad financial situation lol That moment someone stops me to ask where I got an item from that I thrifted feels like a little victory and makes me appreciate that piece of clothing even more :) Once I can afford to I would invest in slow fashion and support small businesses and creators instead of big corporations who destroy the planet

[@elleestfrancaise]

I’ve been following you since day one and it’s so interesting to see how you’ve evolved. Sharing your opinions with the world makes me really hopeful because people need to hear what many of us have to say (and you have the platform to advocate it). I truly love the direction that your videos are going in. Keep hating;)))❤️❤️

[@piperleelloyd]

This totally makes sense! Honestly I needed to hear this and I definitely fall victim to the anxiety of not hopping on trends fast enough. But if I’m worried about hopping on before the trend dies, is it really worth buying? I can always count on you to be the voice of reason when I’ve been on TikTok too much 😂❤

[@kohokohokoho9172]

one of my favorite fashion videos on the internet. its not so much gatekeeping as encouraging people to make their purchase more of a personal choice idk internet language is weird.

[@amelieryan6587]

This is such a good take and one of my favourite videos you have made. I hope to see more youtube creators analyse fashion in this way!

[@maceymorse6037]

you’re so real for this laini

[@Daniellethedaisy]

And I’m so with you on everyone being unique and not looking alike! I don’t hop on trends much. I love small shopping😃