🦄 Why INFPs Feel Like Outcasts

[@iosono_aura]

The minute I started finally pursuing my dreams my life completely flipped within a couple of years. I was a confused and repressed little INFP that could not believe in herself and I had a terrible job that I hated. I always felt I was on this earth to sing, but never really went after it. When I actually started studying with a vocal coach It just felt so right, and everything started flowing like crazy from there. I met some amazing, kind and competent people that helped me along my journey, and long (very long) story short I'm now making a living from being a songwriter and artist, and a Visual Identity coach for other artists and music professionals. My creativity has never been so "active" and I am embracing myself and my weirdness more and more. If anyone is reading, if you feel like an outcast, start feeling like you are special instead, because you are! You cannot be like others, you are so full of magic!

[@GeekPsychology]

Wonderfully put and it really sounds like a parallel to my journey as well. ✨

[@prototypex674]

I would like to give a MASSIVE thank you for leaving a comment here. This just made me cry so hard I've literally not cried in what feels like my entire life. The last time I think I cried this hard was probably when I was 7 (if we aren't counting the last time I cried very hard over a TV show 3 years ago). I'm so incredibly proud of you for being able to pursue your dreams to the fullest and to become exactly what you believe you were born to do. Is there anywhere that I could see, read, listen to some of your work? I would love to check it out! This resonated with me so much because I have also been thinking a lot about getting myself a vocal coach. Music helped me get out of my own darkest world. I was stuck in it for what felt like an eternity. I have probably made more progress in the last 3 years than I did in the rest of my entire (almost) 20 years of living on this Earth. That's why I feel like I have to become the greatest version of myself, and why I'm almost certain that I want to pursue music for the rest of my life. I wasn't sure yet as I have only just discovered about my personality type 3 months ago, but after reading your comment, I think I had some sort of moment of clarity. I already feel like so much has happened in the last 3 months, as I very recently had an awakening of sort, where I almost suddenly started living life in the moment, gained immense focus, stopped overthinking, and almost all my anxiety had left my body. It was literally like a miracle, I can't explain it with mere words. I'm having another breakdown right as I write this. Skip a good 5 minutes, I just came back to my computer after crying even harder, so much that I momentarily couldn't breathe and right now my hands are shaking. Sorry if this is cringey for you to read, I'm not going to let myself overthink anymore and not give credit where it is due, over my own insecurity. One of the other reasons why this made me cry is that I couldn't help but start thinking about all the other INFPs out there who are currently living their worst nightmare, and thinking there's something wrong with them, with nobody there to give them a big warm hug. Either because they literally have nobody, or they might be too shy to open up to anyone about the struggles they're going through, perhaps even their own parents (and I say that from my own personal experience, I have barely ever told them anything). I just broke down again as I was writing this. Anyways, I'm aware that we like to repeat ourselves excessively, it feels like no amount of words could possibly emphasise how deeply we feel so I'm just going to stop talking about that now. Thank you for helping me bring out a life time worth of pent-up emotion, you have no idea how much I felt like I needed it but couldn't get myself to do it. I recently learnt one of my first ever songs off by heart (even though it's mostly in Korean and I don't know it). I will continue to learn singing/rapping my favourite songs, and expanding in all areas of music so that I can feel alive and maybe one day I can make it 🙌 I think I realise now, that the only way to succeed, is to embrace that "weirdness". May God bless you, your family, and friends, and from the bottom of my seemingly broken heart, I wish you the absolute best and endless growth. Please never stop being you, and I know you will fulfil your deepest dreams and desires ❤😊

[@hazelineronquillo7122]

I am a visual artist,teacher and an INFP♥️♥️♥️

[@FutureFendiFsnista]

My therapist told me, "have you ever thought that you were born to stand out?" Truer words have never been said when it comes to INFPs and other intuitive types. We think differently and it's those thoughts that lead to great discoveries! Appreciate the great reminder 😊 Edit: Your singing of Hanson's MMMBop at the end was gold!🌟

[@GeekPsychology]

Thanks for sharing!! That's a great question that your therapist asked! It was... something... idk if gold is the right term for it lol

[@behroozshahdaftar4209]

I agree with this, but it's not easy. INFPs are seen as weird and eccentric and intense. It can often lead to loneliness.

[@GeekPsychology]

Not easy. Never will be. I think all types have their "not easy" domains. Ours are just highlighted often. Maybe it's a sign that the world wants us to find a way to make it work out.

[@behroozshahdaftar4209]

@@GeekPsychology Thank you. In other words, carve out our own life-path. I get that.

[@steffia.4449]

I've embraced being weird and can shrug people's comments off meanwhile. But people also compliment me on my art and even though I'm "wasting time" on it... I like that it makes people smile. So empathy really takes some twists for us... But it takes some courage to dare to be ourselves

[@GeekPsychology]

Your drawings are great ^^ If it makes you and others feel good, I don't think you or anyone could consider it a waste.

[@kellieliang]

I am excited to be on the journey of leveraging my INFP talents after feeling like an outcast and useless for so long. :D Also I loved the ending, haha.

[@GeekPsychology]

Great to have you here and hear that you're on the journey! It's about time!

[@Charaito]

I am an artist and an actor, and it's a very unstable career path. When people ask me what I do, I tend to get bashful and embarrassed, and fumble for words. I fear telling them what I do, what they'll think. I am learning to lean into my truths and not worry so much about impressing others or what they might think of me. If they think I'm a loser, I'll let them. I'm happy and I live within my means, and I probably won't see them again. Interacting with a small community of similar creatives has been super helpful. Thank you so much for the video! I feel like I'm starting to understand myself a bit more.

[@MargaritaRominaBarrion]

Thank you, now I know that when I'm feeling weird, or lonely or sad... seeking solace... I would go to your channel. You have the kindest INFP looking face and your voice and perspectives would definitely lift me up. Thank you, thank you!

[@moonpearl4736]

Even ChatGPT, when asked about riding a Unicorn to Mars, says "Unicorns are not real and getting to Mars is a big deal." But when prompted "What if there was a magic bubble around the Unicorn that provided air, what else would I need" a great story pops out.

[@GeekPsychology]

lol. There’s always a way!

[@mandalovescatspandas1781]

One thing I have discovered in developing a personal relationship with God, worshipping and praising Jesus and just being spiritual, it really fits into my INFP personality well. It like, meshes wonderfully. And it was tough getting to that. Like, I fought and kicked and resisted the entire time 😅 But once I did, it has given me an indescribable sense of peace and contentment. I don't mind being an outcast one bit. Always have been one, always will. And as someone that's usually found how to cope with everything by myself, it's nice to discover that you need other people, and it's ok for others to see that deep, icky vulnerable side of you. And it's ok for them to reach out a hand to help you back up. It really is ok, and I love these people very much.

[@aninfphilosophy]

Hi, friend. I know exactly how you feel. I think being an INFP meshes very well with spirituality, but the kind that emphasizes a relationship with God. I've never identified with religion that emphasizes rules, tradition, etc. Not that those things are bad in and of themselves. It's good to have tradition. But to have tradition without love - that's the bad part. Anyways, God bless you. ❤️

[@mandalovescatspandas1781]

@@aninfphilosophy God bless you too, dear sister 🙏💕 Thank you for your insight 😊 May God be with you through all your steps~

[@GeekPsychology]

People can be surprisingly helpful! And we go further with the help of others... but I understand the hesitation as well...

[@ClubENTP]

The INFP is the Most imaginative type of all 16 types.

[@GeekPsychology]

We definitely have a unique blend of it.

[@itzjompe6747]

These are important videos, "being yourself" is the best way to have power and motivation to push and create and strive in the world. The way I always thought about it is as an INFP you have to sort of "attack" the world with yourself, anyway thank you for making these

[@GeekPsychology]

Interesting mindset! I think it could work with a lot of people who want to make an impact / take control.

[@margolitapnina6716]

well the unicorn always jumps off the cliff and we start flying to the stars. I think my imagination is something that keeps me "ready" to beautiful things that could happen. So many times my day dreaming became "reality" ...

[@GeekPsychology]

A vivid imagination is a blessing.

[@sweetsavour6174]

12:57 Julia Cameron's "The Artist's Way" teaches us how to be artists who are **not** miserable.

[@juliz2500]

I was lonely for most of my twenties. I had a few close friends but I struggled with embracing and expressing myself so I still felt alone most of the time. Now I am in my thirties, I'm finally over my quarter life crisis and I decided to become a social worker and a writer. So I am now a student (again) and I use my classes to practice expressing my thoughts and ideas. In the beginning I struggled a lot with finding the right words at the right time but I am getting better and the feedback I get is really encouraging too. People have told me "you sound like you have so much experience" or "having you in our group is really inspiring". I'm getting so much confidence from these comments as I feel more and more appreciated for who I am.

[@GeekPsychology]

Those are great comments! Make sure you really take them to heart as motivation and continue to make those have more weight than anything else that others might say.

[@juliz2500]

@@GeekPsychology thanks for your reply. And thank you for your great content. The internet Is a wonderful thing for sensitive people like us when it's hard to find like-minded individuals in the real world.

[@Andy-wt3qo]

Hi! As a writer, what do you write about and where do you express/ publish them? I'm still searching for a platform/ outlet that I can stick with for years.

[@juliz2500]

@@Andy-wt3qo I understand that my comment reads like I'm already writing and publishing stuff. Actually, no. I'm doing baby steps, since I'm still struggling with depression. So what I meant to say was that I was at that time working on expressing myself verbally in spoken language and that I was using my classes for that. I'm still not close to being a writer. I journal a lot but I wouldn't say that my writing skills are good enough to write a book. I still don't know my own voice. So that's why I decided to work on my communication skills first.

[@Andy-wt3qo]

@@juliz2500 Makes sense ☺️ I wish you all the best, and am excited for your endeavours. Baby steps are good. Keep it up and stay strong.

[@MomandBuggs]

me in a family full of sensors🙃

[@GeekPsychology]

yeah mine too :o

[@joannemaloney9087]

Thank you so much Matt for the encouragement! I've felt like an outcast for as long as I can remember and always felt like I needed some type of creative outlet. I'm an INFP and proud of it! Still trying to figure out how to get what's in my head out into the world, but you've given me some great ideas. Creative writing course might be what I need. Or maybe nature photography, since I am a hiker. Thank you again!

[@GeekPsychology]

You're so welcome! Lots of options, just gotta do them long enough to see which you gravitate towards. ^^

[@nomadicgamer9466]

This made me cry. :( .. I've always felt like an outsider because the systems of the world are all wrong. And no support from friends or family. No friends to speak of, really - just acquaintances at best over the years. I know that things will get better for me but .. I'm fine with being an outsider to a place that never wanted me and that I don't want it. All I want, honestly, is just a tiny little corner to call my own ..

[@julia.no.X]

Why a tiny little corner? Why not a big spacious beach, for example, that you can call your own? 😃

[@GeekPsychology]

You'll get it :) Just gotta find your tribe and embrace them.

[@letsreadtextbook1687]

How about your house/room?

[@GeekPsychology]

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[@letsreadtextbook1687]

Do we have to pay subscription 🙃

[@GeekPsychology]

Subscription? Nope. Lifetime purchase.

[@stardreamer3492]

Thanks, Matt. ^_^ What made me feel less like an outcast is finding the right workplace. The people around me are constantly helping each other. I'm so grateful to be where I am right now; I never want to leave! Also, is that song from the "Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego" show?

[@GeekPsychology]

Thanks for the donation! Sounds like you’ve found a great place to work! Is the type of work also good for your INFP personality type? No, it’s not. It’s Hanson - Mmmbop

[@stardreamer3492]

@@GeekPsychology Aah, yes now I remember that song! About my job, I work with students with disabilities by helping them to get academic accommodations. I also proctor exams and do academic coaching. It's great to work at a college with the students because I get to serve others and I can listen to people talk about their problems (big and small). As an INFP, I usually don't quickly find solutions to problems, but I do like to listen, and I think the students notice and appreciate that.

[@moonpearl4736]

Love the "non ending", LOL.

[@GeekPsychology]

:D even after 830+ videos it still happens sometimes!

[@Robidu1973]

The problem is that Sensors generally tend to have severe difficulties to understand Intuitives. The problem is, Intuition tends to make huge leaps between thoughts, oftentimes leading to seeming non-sequiturs or seemingly outlandish ideas. What they frequently fail to consider is that these thoughts have an origin but instead of exploring that, they tend to dismiss it on many occasions. Now, if you, as a young INFP, get shamed for that on virtually every occasion, that has devastating effects on you. It is only much later that I noticed that there isn't anything wrong with me, but it's the world that's absolutely broken in this regard (that is, when I started to educate myself about the MBTI). However, the damage had been done by then, and it's quite a Sisyphus's Task to shake the effects off and heal.

[@DanielByers-qf9qi]

Yes: Sensors tend not to connect abstract (intangible) dots, and thus dismiss out of hand what iNtuitives perceive. I long ago thought of writing a book titled: "How to Be an Enn in an Ess World". My longtime best friend is an INFP (while I am an INTJ); we speak the same abstract/intuitive language. Even if we strongly disagree on specific issues, we at least can understand each other.

[@hazelineronquillo7122]

It's so empowering❤

[@charmmaeonineza1501]

In answer to your question about how one can be creative and draw out one's art if one is not feeling sad, what I usually do is recall those "heavy scenes" in my life and use them as fuel. My friends and I call it "unlocking" our "box of horrors" or "skeletons in the closet" or something along those lines. It takes a bit of help at first especially if it's associated with heavy trauma, but it can be done. The idea is to gradually release those "negatives" in whisps and sprays rather than one major disaster. Sometimes, it also doesn't have to be something sad, but even other types of raw emotion, like frustration, anger, or even something positive like longing, joy, and love can be used to unleash our creative juices. There are even people who make use of "calm" and "relaxed" feelings to do their creations, like chefs, bakers, and food artists, for example.

[@GeekPsychology]

"box of horrors" -- wow! I like that one. It's all about accessing the state through breathing / physiology / mindset... but going to that state is something I've strived so hard to NOT do, that doing it intentionally seems tricky.

[@MiriamTenderness]

⁠@@GeekPsychologyI manage to still create while on antidepressants. My work is less dark - but as imaginative.

[@fremmer007]

I think maybe, if INFPs take the "your weird" comment and translate it to "I dont understand you", we could deal with it better. I genuinely dont believe people are out to hurt us with that comment. Personally, I would accept not being understood, rather than feeling like I dont belong/have a place in the world.

[@zitrodivad]

mmbop!

[@GeekPsychology]

😂

[@paulneill6897]

Love the channel mate thank you. ❤

[@GeekPsychology]

^^ thanks a bunch!

[@khadeejadja]

(⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)🌹🌹🌹(⁠ ⁠╹⁠▽⁠╹⁠ ⁠) Beautiful than ever !!! As someone who was born and raised in ESFP culture, I can relate so much to this video. I did remember a reunion with my long lost childhood friend who was also my schoolmates since elementary school to high school. I always thought I was a bad*** *beep* at that time, but what did she mentioned about me was not also a surprise, " Instead of bad*** *beep*, you're an eccentric." Can't help from being called weird, eccentric, nutty and anything like that by relatives, friends and acquaintances, and deep within feeling like a total outcast since childhood, her words finally lead me to an acceptence. Thank you Matt for this dear video. After suscribing to your channel, I have a thought of coming out from my retirement and reactivate my long abandoned personal blog. I like your videos about typing fictional characters and it really helped me to identify the personality type of the characters in novels and short stories. BTW the melody beat on those last minutes reminds me to a song titled 'To Love Somebody' by The Bee Gees. I don't know if any INFPs here love that song... But one of the group members-Robin Gibb- was an INFP too. His famous 'I Started A Joke' song, was about being an outcast... When an INFP or an ISFP sing a song, it always give some goosebumps.😊😊😊 Deep Fi... kzbin.info/www/bejne/npC1lo2NhcaloaM

[@GeekPsychology]

I think it'd be great for you to get back into doing the blog! Play around with creativity and self-expression-- especially as an INFP.

[@khadeejadja]

@@GeekPsychology 👍👍👍👍👍👍 Thank you Matt. Looking forward for it...😊😊😊

[@ClubENTP]

Hey Ya! You just need to shake it like a Polaroid picture. Ooops, wrong outcast.

[@GeekPsychology]

😂

[@ClubENTP]

@@GeekPsychology Sorry, but I’m a bit of an Outcast fan. lol

[@m2pozad]

It seems that the word is out that INFP females make fantastic girlfriends. While the Johnny Depp case did not help male INFP boyfriend prospects.

[@GeekPsychology]

I didn't follow it much, but didn't it end up that she was a crazy liar and causing tons of provoking issues? I mean... she took a poo in his bed, right? #completelysane

[@julia.no.X]

@@GeekPsychology 😆

[@julia.no.X]

I don’t understand what you mean He is an amazing talented, attentive, and generous person, who also stood his ground when film production companies wanted to make a product out of him and stood up for his reputation.

[@m2pozad]

@@julia.no.X Love your loyalty. Johnny's career was over, due to years of drug and alcohol abuse that has rendered him difficult to work with, and Amber Heard's Op-Ed piece on domestic violence and abuse. But winning his case in the US may have turned his options around for more Pirate movie roles. As well, he has been near bankruptcy due to out of control spending sprees, and needing a staff to manage his obligations and party lifestyle. Johnny's popularity in the US biased the jury. Similar to yourself.

[@julia.no.X]

​​​​​@@m2pozad Yes, I am partial. I won't deny it. I most likely wouldn't have made it into the jury, but I watched the whole of the trial and if you're impartial you'll see who is the guilty party. However, all this is irrelevant to your initial comment. I don't think that people will go around choosing their partners based on the type from get go, or would care what type Johnny Depp is. As far as his success and career is concerned, even if he'd been left penniless or had never produced anything from now on, he has impacted the world with his talent. And for goodness' sake people retire when 60, he might as well do that. As for his employees managing his finances - that is why he has those professionals because that's their expertise. He is an actor and not a financier. As for his lifestyle - that's his personal business what he does and how he spends the money he's earned.

[@serenacomeau2350]

Finding a socially diverse group with shared interest... for me, playing guitar with rock stars and wannabes, (good name for a band), and joing a pool league.

[@holip2200]

Im a 🦄

[@jebajaj3704]

You go 🦄! I'm like a cat, but I don't know how to make those small cute pictures.

[@hadiza1]

🦄💜💆🏾‍♀️

[@GeekPsychology]

😻

[@truthandreasonministry5887]

I’m an INFP married to a sensor.

[@Barqhead]

Same

[@cutiepi3_patti]

act like normal 😂😭

[@GeekPsychology]

heard it before?

[@cutiepi3_patti]

@@GeekPsychology yupp I always talk to myself that i gotta act like im normal 🥹✌️

[@truthandreasonministry5887]

I’m an INFP married to a sensor.

[@MeliMeli66]

an isfp?

[@GeekPsychology]

how's that working out for ya?

[@steffia.4449]

Nothing wrong with that... Can be grounding 😉 (INFP married to an ISFJ for 14 years)

[@truthandreasonministry5887]

@@MeliMeli66, ISFJ

[@truthandreasonministry5887]

@@GeekPsychology, it has its challenges. Conflict and misunderstanding happens over my career outlook. She views things from a more concrete, practical, and “what works” mindset. Authenticity isn’t really considered. I approach it from a more “what I’m good at” and “what feels right perspective”, but unfortunately this eliminates lots of conventional career paths, so we have clashes.