Why Men Aren't Going to Church?

[@RaaUnder]

People go to church for many different reasons and a lot of people will be surprised as to how many go for reasons that have NOTHING to do with GOD.

[@jld4870]

When the gospel is not preached-and there is not agreement-grace alone by faith alone in Christ, not our works lest any man boast, the church is dead. It is Galatian error. It becomes a social circle.

[@Smarty2able]

Oh I know now after dating and the people I was friends with. Kinda scary

[@JerryMicheal869]

I love the grounded reality of this channel!!, All over the world, I'm so much excited this second time withdrawing $78k profits off my investment

[@itskenlang]

Yes amen to that. Not everyone in the building are sheep, whether it's guests or regulars.

[@BWyatt76]

As a man who stopped going to church in 2017, I got tired of Sunday morning being geared around the music, and the emotional high music gives. When church is about getting a music high, the teaching and instruction suffers. When I left church, it was due to the lack of teaching. Frustrated, I decided to open the Bible on my own, and read it cover to cover. I continue to do that today, and I'm probably going through the Bible for the 6th time. I've learned a lot more on my own, than my years going to church. Men aren't interested in the music high, they want information and instruction from our Heavenly Father.

[@annetteysquierdo]

I notice a lot of women in the comments invalidating men and thinking they know more about men’s needs and experiences. Don’t we hate when men do that to us? Do we want men to speak for us and our experiences as if they know more about our ways, and make us bad for how we are wired? I for one don’t. Think about what you’re saying when you’re putting them down for how they were made. Treat them how you would want to be treated. Shame never changed anyone-not long term anyway. It’s when we fully accept someone that they feel loved and are set up for change, and it’s the long term change that occurs because the desire comes from within.

[@itskenlang]

Yes we should treat him/her the way we want to be treated as referenced in Luke 6:31 but the key is show Christ as our example. As for your last sentence, I'll give you one better; Regardless of how someone is, when we show them the love of Christ is when they will feel loved and be compelled to change because it draws them closer to Him. We want them to see Jesus when they look at us. And that change doesn't have to be long-term, because God can break shackles in an instant and make them alive again in Christ by grace through faith. It doesn't come from desire either, it comes from the Holy Spirit who provides it. Showing Christ will change someone better and faster than anything else we could think of on our own. Because God is that much bigger. I believe that. Because it is written.

[@annetteysquierdo]

@@itskenlang Exactly. The Holy Spirit in them will convict and provide the power to change. I apologize, I should’ve been more specific when I said “from within.”

[@gabrielidusogie9189]

God bless you. That’s my one problem with guys like Chris Perry and Tim Ross. It seems they use shame and guilt as a means to fix men and it doesn’t work

[@Dilley_G45]

No, men can very well sit still and listen. In the traditional Churches there is usually not a shortage of men. And you do participate, you sing hymns, you have communal prayer and Communion. The problem is AFTER service. Most churches do not have fellowship at all. Maybe a Bible group but nothing that involves activity or you as a person. Bible classes are usually just sit down and listen and "it's not about you". Of course the service isn't about me. But when I spend 2 hour in someone's home and there is no social interaction? No thanks. I can have no social interaction at home. I have a Bible at home as well. We need fellowship, friendship, shared activities

[@WigglyBro]

I have a fiancé who attends church rather often and she has, for the longest time, insisted that I attend with her. I usually refused, but finally gave in at some point and my second time in attendance, the pastor was talking about how men are shirking in their responsibilities/duties (we aren't) and giving the whole baby boomer-esque "happy wife, happy life" spiel and how men need to listen to their wives more often. It was a bunch of sexist drivel. I rolled my eyes and had the urge to walk out right there but didn't want to embarrass my fiancé. If I was single? I'd be out of there right then. She sensed my discomfort, and I told her in the vehicle that it was awkward, uncomfortable, and I didn't feel like I belonged during either of my two visits. She has even thought about switching to a different church that might be more comfortable for me, but nah, I doubt any other church around here will be any better. The other church she knew of has a leadership group entirely of women and the congregation mostly female, and even that church lacked a decent male population. In an effort to attract more men or equalize the disparty, the ladies decided that they would only sing 'masculine' worship songs and that's when more men started to attend, but I'm still not there to be bashed while women are praised. It created a bad impression in me. Am I supposed to worship and submit to God or my fiancé? If churches (and women) want more male attendance, its leaders need to actually focus on relevant information and not deliver silly speeches to men about how useless and terrible we are as if women are inherently perfect instead. We deal with enough misandry growing up in a gynocentric society that I don't need to attend a church once or twice a week to have people delivering sermons that might as well come from a radical feminist. The women you are referring to are indeed part of the problem, acting as if to police men. No thanks.

[@CRUCIALMEDIAGROUP]

Man I remember when I was younger I remember going to Eddie long church.. he was telling the women if a man can’t put 5 carat vvs ring on your finger he’s not the man god has for them.. after that I was done.. Men are not that easily fooled and can see through the hustle..

[@MoonMoon-fx1op]

That ain't what we talking about. If one is truly a believer, they will SEEK a church to be a part of. You can't say you love Christ and not love the church. It's that simple.

[@ChristinaOstil115]

Did Men love jail time under the Lord?

[@Mr.Jaquaveon2k]

@@MoonMoon-fx1opThat’s basically what we are talking about. Why is he worried about how big the diamonds on a woman’s finger is? Nothing to do with nothing

[@doms5755]

@@MoonMoon-fx1opdid the thief on the cross love Christ or nah? Did Abraham, Noah love Christ?

[@davidlafleche1142]

​@@MoonMoon-fx1opWhen the church is teaching heresy, there is nothing to love.

[@HopeBCARE]

This is great! I love this conversation and totally agree that men need connection. So many are broken and don't or can't express this brokenness!

[@toomuchinformation]

This is a really interesting subject. What I’ve noticed in the comments is how men’s needs are being invalidated,misinterpreted and misunderstood. You cant ask men to be open and then dismiss them when they don’t say what you want them to say. From what I’ve read men DO want mentorship and discipleship, but even more importantly a sense of purpose and mission. One thing David Murrow mentions in his book: “Why Men Hate Going to Church” is once men see that a space is implicitly or explicitly catering to women, they leave faster than Roadrunner or just don’t bother showing up at all. I’d like to see the Perry’s do a book review on David Murrow’s book and also the book: “Why Black Men Don’t Go To Church” by Dr Jawanza Kunjufu. These books do provide guidelines and actionable ideas and it behooves men to start being more proactive in (re)designing a Church that is a more fully rounded one.

[@woowoo8343]

It’s really sad to see but I see it too and mostly from the women. Unfortunately the tension that we see between men and women in society is integrated in church culture as well. And the unwillingness to understand one another is just as bad. Which is why many will conclude that the issue is simply a matter of ego. I think men are more nuanced than we are given credit for and I think it’s unfair to essentially say that y’all just have an ego/pride issue and call it a day. More conversations need to be had so that we can stop making these assumptions rooted in cynicism and come to a real understanding. Men need to be humanized just as much as women.

[@gamingterrain3703]

Heavy on that middle section. Churches these days have become far too feminized and their preaching has been too watered down. My dad and i are always talking about how we wish our priest would actually start commenting on the things going on in our culture and politics today and apply biblical teachings to that. It would be so much more interesting. But instead its the same "be nice, be kind" message over and over, so its no wonder there arent that many men in church. Church leaders these days are too afraid to get a little harsh and doing so has just let society get worse and worse

[@toomuchinformation]

@@gamingterrain3703 Well wishing is one thing. Why not come up with some concrete ideas to improve male church attendance? Just complaining and wishing isn't going to change anything.

[@wtcbd01]

I'll just be blunt. unconsciously, many men will NOT submit to another man that is constantly being uplifted and revered by THEIR woman. Before you jump and yell. Ask yourself has your man EVER said something to you that you casually heard but somewhat dismissed. However, you heard that same or similar thing from the pastor and YOU mention it back to your man and he doesn't receive it as well as you thought or he even said "I said that last week"? We as men want to fellowship with other men in christ and have good role models, NOT the skinny jean, Louis vuitton wearing man that pulled up in his second Rolls Royce paid by ME and other congregation members. show need and unity, respect for each other in Christ and you will see men coming back to the churches.

[@oldschool5]

That's true. And men are less likely to allow myths to be passed as history. You can tell a woman that a donkey was talkin much easier than you can tell a man

@@oldschool5that’s not a myth though

[@oldschool5]

The talking donkey ain't myth?

[@justabreeze460]

That’s a very childish reason😂

@@oldschool5 no

[@itskenlang]

What you said at the end about men wanting more connection and discipleship is so true. I think one of the bigger reasons why is because of the way the services are typically structured as a program type of setting where you come, sit, watch and consume what's happening on stage. And to your point of the church not cultivating the type of community environment, this is true. Depending on what church it is, there may or may not be much opportunity to have any participation during service from the congregation, and you barely get any discipleship out of it.

[@Dilley_G45]

I think as a man sitting down and listening is not the problem. The problem is that most Churches have nothing to offer to men, especially single men. And men's bible groups are full of people you can't hang out with. A bible group that doesn't socialize I am not interested in. Like the guy in the video said, you could drop dead and noone would notice. Why would I join, give to or feel welcome in such a place

[@lccanimations]

Facts!

[@sw9868]

It's not about us or our egos. We're to be worshipers, not consumers.

[@deathrager2404]

stop going to church. just stay at home, read your bible, worship the Lord, and help people in the real world. church is , for the most part, not bad but its not all there is. the real church is your body. cherish that.

[@kap849]

​@@deathrager2404hey hey easy. Please don't mislead people. Do not forsake the gathering of believers. Nowhere does the Bible tell us to "stop going to church and read the Bible for yourself at home." We need fellowship with other believers. I've seen more and more people opt for home churches where a handful of people/families gather once a week for fellowship.

[@deathrager2404]

@@kap849 the bible tells us that if we are not welcome wherever, we need to kick the dust off our feet. i went to a church, they had a female co preacher. litterally preaching the gospel. according to that same gospel , this is not allowed. thus this is false doctrine. i confronted the pastor, he told me to find another church. what pastor, who follows the bible aka the word of God, would tell a believer to leave and seek another churhc? that pastor is not of God. that same pastor told me: we are not going to change the way we run this church!!! i agreed, he should run it God's way but he is gonna run it HIS way. i then left. i really dont have time to seek for all churches to find one that is good. and besides , i have received a mission from Jesus, to spread his word and capture lost souls for him. i tried this on multiple occasions, and pretty much failed everywhere. not that i failed by my own hand, but because the people i have spoken too rather hear what they WANT to hear, instead of hearing what they NEED to hear. THEY choose to follow false doctrine. not me. that church i spoke of, i talked to fellowshippers that went there for 20 years, none of them went with me to confront the pastor. how come? because the pastor is a snake that is telling these poor people what they want to hear, and they love to hear what they WANT to hear. im nto that guy, i will tell you the truth. you dont even need to go to church bro. yoou need to show love to EVERYBODY, have compassion for EVERYBODY, and spread the word to EVERYBODY. both believers and non believers. and if you are not welcome, you need to kick the dust off your feet. i hope it was clear.

[@Atypical82]

It’s true what the guys stated. But other reasons why men don’t go to church: 1. Unbelief 2. They don’t trust some of these pastors 3. They don’t want them around their women (should be wives) and children if any 4. They love their sins 5. No understanding 6. Their wife loves the church and/or has more respect for the pastor or other men than him 7. Feminism 8. Effeminate men 9. Women and children are in control 10. Sin with others that doesn’t get dealt with Etc.

[@Heartwing37]

Why men SHOULD go: 1. Worship the Lord and give Him the glory.

[@TheBlaxkWolf]

So they’re egotistical, basically is what you’re saying

[@MoonMoon-fx1op]

​​@@TheBlaxkWolf👀 I need to see what the reply is 😂

[@gabrielidusogie9189]

@@TheBlaxkWolfno I think they have very valid needs and questions that get dismissed and their sins and faults often get magnified more than others. We’re all egoistical, men and women. One could argue that your reply was an example of egotism because it appears you chose to dismiss or ignore his points and instead make a dig at a man’s perceived faults.

[@TheFockerizer]

@@TheBlaxkWolf oh and women arent?

[@gregaroller]

Wow that really hit home for me I was feeling guilty I just stayed home today I just couldn't make myself walk through that door one more time and a place that if I freaking died it wouldn't even matter nobody would even know in service at this particular place it's just a place they throw you in to take care of a need and nobody even knows you're there it's like some dark hole you've been thrown into

[@m_jay5]

Being a single guy in your 30s in church is just a depressing place to be - that's why I've been watching sermons online for the last several years

[@taebrown384]

Be encouraged, your life is valuable regardless of relationship status

[@dwightsmith4641]

It is not just church where men feel nothing but hate from women. In school boys are drugged up for ADHD by their female teachers. Boys are suspended from school much more frequently. Heaven forbid some boy asks a girl to a dance when she is not interested in him. Colleges have prerequisite hate classes that men have to attend which is why a large percentage of men are dropping out. The me too movement has made the workplace a nightmare for men. Men don’t speak at work and bosses have cameras on them during all meetings as demanded by the HR department who hate men. Tic toc has ruined going to the gym for men and now they build home gyms. Women complain that gyms are closing now. Many men talk constantly about moving off grid and van life to get away from female hate. Hunting and fishing licenses are off the charts for sales. Family court has destroyed men turning them into slaves or convicts. US has the lowest marriage rate since the 1860’s. 2023 was a record year in the US for women because they no longer have to worry about 50,000 men. Church is just one more place that men get to be hated and screamed at. Men get ZERO encouragement for anything.

[@Smarty2able]

I'm in the same boat.

[@Smarty2able]

​​@@dwightsmith4641I'm a female teacher and I couldn't agree more that kids are getting drugged for any little behavior and it's horrifying to watch. I can't say much about it when majority agrees it's ok because of $$$. Gym is more distracting because the women have definitely changed. When I'm in the bathroom they take selfies with their bodies in the mirror and butts. I'm like is the gym for health or thirst trap

[@jeremiahk8701]

same goes for women over 30 years. For them in some ways it is even worse.

[@KevinNdero]

Why aren't we talking about the modern day church is heavily feminise? I mean our church isn't having this issue. When you speak more on how something makes you feel and less challenge

[@tryingbutfailing]

Also, 10% is brutal for what is expected to be a provider and many of us simply can not afford it right now. If a man is down, nobody is going to save him or care.

[@outtahere321]

Most people do not know that the tithe is part of the old testament law. We are no longer under law. God wants people to give from their heaets.

[@tanw.5149]

1:51 it's really the submission part about it all. Male and female we ,are created to submit and serve God. Attendance in the church is to be to worship the Lord, get deliverance etc. Ya know. I pray everyone keeps chasing Matthew 6:33

[@meganp8766]

Amen!

[@SeniorAdrian]

YES. As a 32 years old single man, i don't want to go to church anymore because the people on stage get to have the wives. I feel soulless and bored in church until i start daydreaming.

[@jeremiahk8701]

Nailed it. It is all about image.

[@hidden-treasures]

First, I'm a man who drives an hour past churches to get to an acceptable church. A reformation of the church is badly needed to correct the celebrity worship (pastors cannot be questioned, ever), the capricious "orders" (no one over 40 allowed here, or no card playing there, or no light skinned or dark skinned people here), not to mention the rampant financial abuse. The church is a business today, but actually takes on the worst characteristic of most bad businesses today. In most businesses, you can ask questions. Try doing that in church!

[@jonboy9030]

These conversations are so helpful

[@ShowLSWH]

Modern worship music is also written like a fifty shades of grey poem towards God. Churches will spend 45 minutes singing smut tunes about Jesus and then 30 minutes talking platitudes or condemning dudes for their sins.

[@Thatgirl12-fp3uq]

So, what are the topic should the church in church that you would like to hear?

[@Jeff-zx3eg]

Moreso than men, women want to be emotionally fed and inspired. Men want to be intellectually fed and inspired. Church has become less about teaching and more about emotional manipulation. Not to say this is true in all cases, or even all men and women but generally, this is true

[@whatshatnin4572]

Facts.. But how can be intellectually fed when the preacher is talkin about a talkin donkey? How can you trust your intellect with someone who believes in talkin animals?

[@aar0n709]

@@whatshatnin4572 The donkey didn't talk, God talked through the donkey. The donkey wasn't magical like in a movie. God possessed the donkey as a sign.

[@whatshatnin4572]

@@aar0n709 Sure he did. It's mythology bro. Donkeys don't talk.

[@aar0n709]

@@whatshatnin4572 Umm can you read?? I just said the donkey didn't talk. God talked through the donkey. Donkeys can't talk but God can talk through what He pleases. If you have a problem with that God also talks through the sky itself and that's not even a living organism. You are going to die and go to Hell

[@aar0n709]

@@whatshatnin4572 Your gonna go to Hell

[@Smarty2able]

Maybe they just want more honest and direct people. My dad was talking about the drama behind the scenes in ministry. Its just the hurt and the lack of accountability that men step back. No man likes unnecessary drama and i think we forget thet. Women can maneuver rhat but the men are tired of it

[@misssterling3094]

The men are usually the pastor, deacons, parishioners that are causing the mess. The lack of men in church needs to SHIFT big time.

[@pamelalewis1598]

Enjoyed the interview

[@mitsy565]

I think part of it has to do with the men feeling outnumbered/ a minority. Imagine going to a church with majority men. You may feel like the odd ball. Unless the single man has family or some type of ties to that church, he is not as likely to join majority women churches.

[@Autumn-P.88]

You are so right!

[@mike_b777]

Most modern churches I've been to came with an overload of feminine energy, from the whiny/heartfelt worship songs, the overly emotional theatrical sermons to the general way church people act (fake laughing, cornball behavior, Ned Flanders stereotype). If church felt more like going to the barracks and spiritual warfare and serious topics were put to the forefront (instead of this constant heavy focus on courtship/marriage) you best believe you'd see more men filling up the building. That's why so many men flock to Islam. Since that's literally the vibe. Christianity is way too flowery imo. Just my two cents.

[@sheilargreen4618]

Men, you are so very important and needed. Men of God, it is time to rise up in greater numbers to involvement, participation, and leadership. It is time to pattern holiness in living and devotion to Jesus. We are praying for you. You are treasured.

[@whatshatnin4572]

Praying for us to come into the church is not what us in the church. Being enslaved by Christian European slave masters is what got us into the Christian Church. We are English speaking Christians because our slave master was an English speaking Christian. Well slavery is over. We are free now.. And the longer we are free the more we will go back to our nature. If you want us back in the church, you will have to do what put in the church in the first place- which is slavery, genocide and oppression.

[@adamwalker2377]

Because it's a useless women's book club. Why SHOULD I go?

[@joygibbons5482]

Yes it must be terrible. As a woman I’m doing what Incan to help by avoiding church

[@hotice8885]

​@@joygibbons5482sarcasm....... hmmmm.....

[@okchawk2k]

Because God tells us not to forsake the gathering together.

[@adamwalker2377]

@@okchawk2k no, he doesn't. The diction of Hebrews 10:25 doesn't even give it as a command. It's a dependent clause supporting an entirely different thought - admonishing the letter's recipients to not put their Christian practices under wraps to avoid persecution. I agree that we should be together from time to time, though. What's that got to do with "going to church"?

[@okchawk2k]

@@adamwalker2377 no, throughout the Bible, God admonishes his people to live and work as a team. Christians were never meant to live in isolation. God tells us to gather together in homes and in synagogues or churches in order to encourage, love, worship, pray, and support each other. We are a family. Families spend time together. Even more so as we see the day approach. Acts chapter 2 and 4. Outline this pretty well but again, throughout the Bible, God tells us to spend time together

[@isaak1904]

Church has the prayer of David but doesn’t have the true warrior spirit of David. Men are drawn to the warrior side of David , there must be a balance between the two

[@albertapressley5871]

The issue is that men think going to church is about them. That’s sickening.

[@hereiam587]

Which part of the warrior side of David? What does that look like in a church?

[@misssterling3094]

Why is David being centered instead of Jesus Christ? Men need revelation because Christ is savior, warrior, healer ...EVERYTHING.

[@MoonMoon-fx1op]

@@misssterling3094 EXACTLY

[@Flare6]

@isaak1904 Well said! When David and his men found their wives captured and families captured by the enemy, David encouraged himself in the Lord, prayed to God and then took action of leading his men to rescue their families. Prayer + warrior spirit, which is what men are yearning for but churches that prioritize men don’t have that.

[@mirakleee]

Wow this is so good.

[@scottyyoch3537]

Men are given certain tendencies and atteibutes by their creator Agression Physical strength Logical tendency This is a good thing. These are the same attributes they are criticized and devalued for having The Orthodox church does not do this, and thus does not have the same male attendance problem.

[@hereiam587]

'These are the same attributes they are criticized and devalued for having' - not 'having' (except for aggression which is negative), misusing. Jesus wasn't devalued for His maleness.

[@scottyyoch3537]

@@hereiam587 My comment is about the church today. And are you certain aggression is a negative trait?

[@prayerpower1585]

@@scottyyoch3537 There is bravery, courage, strength, firmness, integrity, steadfastness, tenacity. Aggression in general is negative.

[@scottyyoch3537]

@@prayerpower1585 Ah, in general That creates nuance Where, then, do you see it as acceptable?

[@prayerpower1585]

@@scottyyoch3537 Aggression and force is necessary in emergencies, when someone is forcing a person to do something against their own will and will not take no for an answer, or when there is imminent danger. Jael, a woman, in the old testament used aggression and took charge in a wartime situation when the male leader was afraid. But in general I see no need for a Christian man or woman to be aggressive on a regular basis.

[@martinmartin6300]

This church model which revolves around a weekly meetings where there is audience in the pew and people on stage isn't scriptural anyways. It leads to "christians" who are consumers, not givers let alone followers. It completely lacks discipleship. You can tell whatever you want from the front. If you are not willing to live discipleship, nothing changes.

[@tlegoo]

I’ve read most of the comments here and I think one basic foundational point was missed in this video. And that is the fact that it’s all about your relationship with Christ and your awe for God. A lot of people’s (men and women) reasons for going to church always have to do with other people. Others don’t go coz they got hurt, others go coz they get appreciated, others don’t go coz they don’t get appreciated but they’re missing the main reason why the church was created, to help them stay connected to THE ONE! If men really needed discipleship and connection they would make it their priority to pursue it and find it in the ministries that do give that, and let’s be honest there are many many churches that do give that. Let your reverence and honour for God be the leading factor to why you do and don’t do things.

[@taebrown384]

Beautifully said!

[@nicholasjennifer1394]

You said it all and I completely agree.

[@tonyacanada]

Well stated!

[@ejmommylawrence2000]

I agree!

[@stephanieadim5010]

Yup 👍🏾

[@gabrielidusogie9189]

I think because the church has largely used shame and guilt as a means to try and fix people. Not just men but women too. Guys like Chris Perry and Tim Ross are notorious. They make the role of a man seem easy and any worries and doubts a man has and voices gets shut down as bitterness and laziness in the comment section. No one wants to go where they aren’t heard and seen.

[@MRBOOBIE901]

This conversation lacks analysis. Start by separating the ideal of why men are drawn to church and why women are drawn to church. Start the conversation with the first brother acknowledged the prescence and reverence of the pastor over service and community.

[@johnstephens8640]

This is nothing new. It's been a problem for decades. The church has lost it's way and mesage in general. The church for most of it's history had no problem with men. Only, when it was infected with feminist and worldly philosophy, men became a problem. Then, the men left the church. The church in general. also has neglected the family. The church is weak and dying. I don't think it can be saved.

[@KMANelPADRINO]

The nail has been hit on the head.

[@hereiam587]

The primary reason to go to church is to worship God in the way He instructs through His word. I attend church to hear from God through the teaching and to learn. I went very often when I didn't want to go (for some particular reasons). I think the question is why do men moreso not feel obligated to show up? It's sounds like an obedience and submission issue.

[@albertapressley5871]

Amen!

[@brandonboi9465]

It's the way our modern church portrays submissiveness. Sit down, shut up, don't ask questions, etc. Stand there silently as they sing for nearly an hour in a keynote so high you would be screeching if you attempted. And the songs are love ballads to Jesus (there's a lot to unpack there that will blow your mind). When you show up, the only people who greet you are the greeters at the door (they don't know you, they don't remember you) and maybe the pastor if it's a small congregation. When the service is over, that's it. No one to talk to or hang out with later. Leave, repeat. I don't need to go to a church to pray to God and worship him (singing isn't the only way to worship). I can do that at home. They main reason people tell us men to go is that the best way to worship our Lord is through a community of fellow members of faith. But there is no community for us. By the time a normal young man walks through those doors for the first time, the other guy who has been going through this alone has already left, now it's his turn (like a revolving door without the glass). I've yet to attend a church that didn't immediately look at me with suspicion. The women treat us as either perpetual sinners or potential perpetrators. There is no mission, no call to service, no battle cry. It's about safety and comfort. Young women makeup around

[@outtahere321]

First of all, you need to go to a Bible believing church that preaches with NO COMPROMISE. That type of church I will go to as a man. Anything else....NO.

[@DaedricPrinceOedon]

I dont care why others dont go. I personally don't go to church because i dont need to go to church to worship and love God. I can stay home and read my bible in my room alone and be fine.

[@gogetemboys]

Exactly! Nowhere in scripture are we instructed/commanded to go to church.

[@Sin_cerelySarah]

@@gogetemboysit says not to forsake the gathering of the saints. Not to forgot joining together.

[@jruffin1161]

Follow the money. More men in the church will slow down the tithes. The Black Church constantly try to keep the women single by telling them there potential suitor isn't "evenly yoked". Pulpit Pimping 101.

[@dsine2267]

Thr conclusion is, even tho these men didnt want to admit it, men don't really want to be led by someone they dont highly value and respect or simply don't know amd this is the case with most pastors. While women dont really think too much about it, most of them are there to praise the Lord and unconsciously under the authority of the pastor (mostly men) of that church. The pastor has to be a friend or a mentor they want to listen to. Which brings me to the question of does it really matter? The nature seems to always take over and that s why some men will be attracted by Islam and be really happy about it and convinced it the right way despite what christians may think. We are just who we are

[@roselynglover8927]

Talk about whatz drawing men to Islam and not Christianity.

[@eveathome]

polyamory 😂

[@HereInMyVerona]

Ego/Lust

[@HereInMyVerona]

The flesh. Because it’s not dying to self that is drawing them… In Islam, they can fulfill the Lust of the Flesh without feeling Shame.

[@Reignsupreme76]

I'm a Christian. Islam holds women accountable. Not in the so-called Christian church.

[@KCRvrRnnr]

Most churches today (perhaps through competition with newer, younger churches like the megachurches) seem to be more of a social group/gathering than a place of worship. Fancy coffee bars for example. This is a very valuable thing to many who do not have much of or any social life of their own but..... Women by nature are more social animals than men, and it's no wonder they are drawn to yet another social arena to participate in. Men, on the other hand, sometimes feel like the church is trying to draw them in at the expense of other friends/social networks they already have. If any male reading this has NEVER received the stink-eye (usually from an old church lady) for politely declining to attend yet ANOTHER church function or event because they already made plans for that time outside of the church, then that male has never attended church regularly.

[@kevindavis4709]

To me it’s a married with kids couples club.

[@johnwayne7860]

Exactly, church is the worst place to be as a single.

[@kevindavis4709]

@@johnwayne7860 The American church is totally different from the way. Jesus ended disciples fellowshiped. And how the Bible says the community not just a wife and kids deal. They don’t talk about the family of Christ the body of Christ in their sermon that’s what I noticed with some TV evangelists

[@completelysharise1372]

So good🙌🏽❤️

[@mramirez5239]

I wanted to hear the rest of this clip! "Go watch the whole episode" right but I just wanted to hear the end of the clip getting going this morning. 😄

[@noble604]

The full version is Men Sex and Kevin Samuels.

[@alphaomega7408]

Women don’t care if their men go to church. They don’t want to be seen with men they date or sleep with. Mostly women in church anyway. Many are divorced, widows, single moms. A lot of men aren’t Christian men. Some church services are too long. I go to church when I think the preach starts preaching. Too much praising and singing before the pastor preaches.

[@renzo7503]

The reason the Nation Of Islam attracts men is because MEN LOVE CORRECTION! Men prefer to be corrected as opposed to being patronized and lied to.

[@c.antoinehill100]

This is the reason: Pastors are training me to be their first wives instead of leaders.

[@rodneyharper2275]

The men in the church need to go beyond just having meetings,they need bonding and that is created working on projects together and studying God word

[@Atypical82]

What draws men to Islam is that it makes men think they can be good without God. They would rather believe a lie that makes them feel better than the truth, which will challenge them. And many of them don’t want Christ because of unbelief, and they love their sins. May God grant them repentance.

[@ashleywilliams1988]

I’m really trying to understand as well as a woman but I just don’t. I don’t want to chalk it up to ego but it is at the least a different kind of consumerism. The guys are basically saying women are more attracted to the “goods” as it were of a church- what they see as pastor centered adoration and emotional pageantry. And that can be a conversation cause I definitely have thoughts about the accuracy of that, but they too are looking for the goods of recognition. Also, I would argue that no one who just comes to a church is getting much recognition, male or female. They say if they walk in and don’t feel needed, they don’t want it. Again, as a local church worker, I would never go after a new person and ask them to do a bunch of things. So the problem here also sounds like a lack of sticking it out and serving BEFORE being recognized. That doesn’t happen to anyone. So I really am missing the argument here. And I’d add you also got to stick around long enough to get community and discipleship (and hopefully you’re at a church that does it well). I don’t hear how any of the issues they bring up can possibly be resolved when their whole argument as I hear it is men won’t even stick around to see. Aside from spiritual abuse and other lamentable issues, the majority of people, men and women, don’t go to church because they love themselves more than God.

[@ashleywilliams1988]

I also respect this group a lot but can’t help but notice some real tone-deafness, in this clip at least, to the COUNTLESS amount of scandals coming out and being documented around the evangelical church and I’m sorry but if anything, this evangelical machine they’re talking about does everything to set men up and let them do whatever they please. See: Rise and Fall of Mars Hill, The Secrets of Hillsong, the Jerry Falwell documentary, Shiny Happy People, and so on and sadly so forth. Men largely run these worlds. Clearly I’m more interested in talking about this than I realized 😂

[@toomuchinformation]

@@ashleywilliams1988But aren’t they White?

[@ashleywilliams1988]

@@toomuchinformationdo you think it’s that different in majority Black churches?

[@Arthirias]

I'm not interested in CIA operation mockingbird.

[@SteveIrunguJermaine]

I stopped going to church because of greed hypocrisy etc above a ll God is gracious

[@heatice77]

1-The enemy likes it this way, too many men are regressing backwards giving up the role GOD gave them to lead so the wife becomes the spiritual guide/teacher, instead of the wife being a fellow teacher/guide. Men are falling through the cracks because they are drifting with distractions. 2-Our nature is more reserved and skeptical, so for us to connect with other guys we do not know it can be a harder task 3-Even within church there are clicks and classifications, why is it was ask “what do you do” almost instantly…to put others in a class which is unbiblical and harmful to the body because we push away those who are outside of that class 4-disobedience to the LORD plain and simple, how fast do we get hyped for sports or a new toy (car, electronics, etc) yet the spiritual becomes a “when I get to it” thing. 5-Churches also struggle with their message to the flock, we should be welcoming while feeding the flock at the same time not be so seeking that we forget what we already have and fail to train them up in the LORD’s ways

[@DustyBooks2020]

The Eastern Orthodox Church is growing in the US and it is mostly young men...address that.

[@nicholasjennifer1394]

I hear what he is saying but the church is run by men. You get to see a lot of women because women have been made to believe that the institution of family is heavily dependent on them. If your goal for going to the church is to just be recognized or just have a community then it’s flawed. The ultimate goal is GOD. Anything outside of that should be checked. If you want a community then you have to stick around and put in the effort to build one. This goes for both women and men.

[@SemperCogitas]

Shouldn't Church be about the relationship with Christ...... Why are they catering to anyone but the Good Book?

[@oldschool5]

Men tend to be more critical than the average woman. It's a lot of information available nowadays that tells us that donkeys dont talk in real life

[@logicaltheology1374]

This is a rare moment where I have to admit, this is an interesting idea that I hadn't considered as far as church attendance that men are more put-off than women with the non-interactive format that they take on. Maybe it's related to the hypergamy concept of women looking up to one of the "best" men (the man with the mic up front), like some sort of king.

[@oldschool5]

Also men are less likely to believe in mythological concepts like talking donkeys and a lady being created from a rib of a man. Males are more likely to research things to keep from being lied to. This is why Christianity historically has worked best on slaves and babies.

[@SeniorAdrian]

Yup, that's why every man that touched the mic constantly gets married. Pastors, in general. They get the best deal. A good solution would be to make your own church.

[@hjk7833]

Interesting point. I think one factor is that modern American churches emphasize emotion over reason. Christian KZbin channels that address intellectual themes get huge followings dominated by male followers. Yet when you show up to church on Sunday, the average evangelical church denigrates and insults intellectual pursuits while spiritualizing and praising feelings and emotional experiences.

[@J03LM1]

Here's another question? Why is it that the Holy Spirit is not CONVICTING AND LEADING men to church? We often forget, to my frustration, that the church (the TRUE CHURCH) is NOT an institution that WE humans create, run, and maintain for God. It is instead a HOLY communion that God has established for us. It is God who calls us. It just might be the case that God is refusing to lead men to a place that he doesn't recognize. Think about the modern church. How often do we hear about our sin, our fallenness, our self-righteousness, our futility? Think about how we have subtly and defiantly "redefined and misrepresented" the truth of the word? How much more do you hear about what we "deserve" instead of what we should be grateful for? We have created a cheap replica of the Church designed specifically to please our own identities and egos and then we wonder why God won't bless it. smh.

[@mrs.jack-string2420]

Men, the ones I’ve witnessed, don’t like giving, and some LOVE their sin. Simple.

[@milyd.5784]

Can you give specific examples of what men desire. You say community. What does it look like for men specifically or an example? Be recognized beside the pastor? What does that look like specifically? Is it the structure of the service? How would that look different if catering to men and families? Specifically ? How can do make a place for men to be seen? Ie??- them lead worship? Them lead teachings?? Problem is they don’t want that either? Specific Examples please and not generalized statements. Thank you. 🙏

[@whatshatnin4572]

Intellectually fed. Facts over faith. History over mythology. Concepts backed by nature. Real teachings without pushing fear because fear is weakness. No dogma because dogma is just fear and mythology. Global teachings. Manhood. Nation building.

[@jayr6839]

Because most churches preach feminism sermons to pull on the emotion of women and men can see that.

[@outtahere321]

God appointed men as leaders of the church and the head is Jesus. Churches need to obey what is clearly written in the scriptures and commanded by God. Now there are women becoming pastors and leaders and this goes against what God commands in the scriptures. Most churches now are geared for married couples and families so most men feel ignored or out of place. Very little substantial good doctrine being taught. I would rather stay home and read Spurgeon or Pink to get good solid teaching/preaching.

[@tracypoole8857]

A lot of people think they go to a "masculine" church because the pastor and eldership happen to be male. Just like in many homes, this isn't accurate though. The old saying in the culture of; "if momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy" sounds funny but it's been applied to a devastating effect in the church. Look at the decorations, the carpet, the music, how services are conducted; they have become very feminized to cater to the female audience to the point where the men simply check out mentally (first) and then physically. If I would so much as try to schedule a men's breakfast, (just so they could get to know each other a little bit), we are IMMEDIATELY pushed to make it into a 2 hour long Bible study, and to hurry home to handle their wive's "honey do" list. They are even terrified to even eat a biscuit with gravy lest their wives find out and yell about it! My wife loves when I cook, clean and do work around the house that would traditionally be considered under the role of the woman. But if that was ALL I did, and didn't submit to the obedience of Christ, (which is to LEAD the home, provide, discipline the children and worship from at least an occasional, masculine standpoint), I would eventually lose the respect of my wife. THAT is what is happening in the Church. The "nicer" the little boy is the more he is encouraged to go into the ministry. The boy who has had a couple broken bones, black eyes, works on cars, hunts and can't sit still through an hour long sermon without fidgeting? Nope. Now look at the young men that you DO have in your churches? Fantasy football, video games...no trade skills, poor physical labor, couldn't catch a little fish or even clean it without gagging...and the men who are men are repelled when they see that occurring...

[@oldschool5]

We are not going because we can recognize mythology when we see it.

[@eldin8910]

because how can we focus on the spiritual when our practical lives are shit? The alpha males of the world at least gaf about us

[@alezandradavila2581]

I hate going just tired I like podcast from my House

[@WeAreRoyalty7]

It’s probably because their aren’t Born Again 🤷‍♀️

[@Smithdantzler193]

You don't have to go to church to be born again 😂 many people in church won't make heaven. Many women go to church but have hate in their hearts fornicate like men and strip club what's your point. It's about having faith in Jesus and loving right life 😂

[@ghostbombl8034]

I just never or ever bealive in this stuff and church is about the pastor trying to control and get rich.simple.

[@ThM4097]

Islam is not a one man show. There’s accountability in Islam. No accountability in church, AT ALL!!!

[@Smarty2able]

What are you talking about? I teach their kids and they are not nurtured well at a young age. Some are disrespectful to teachers. Why are some of the kids not potty trained before coming to kindergarten?

[@ny_njtrailrunnert926]

It's helpful to hear a man's perspective. I can understand why it is hard for a man to submit and receive the teachings of another man when for some it is in their nature to be the leader with that comes a strong ego. I feel like this could be particularly true with highly successful and high earning men as well

[@Heartwing37]

Great question! If not for women, most churches would not still be standing!!! 😢 Our church has very few men. I totally disagree that men are ignored unless they are the pastor. That’s not true in my experience. Besides, we don’t go to church to be celebrated, or recognized. We go to worship the Lord. And give Him glory. It’s not about what you get when you go, it’s about what you give. Men are dropping the ball and should do better!

[@Zayindjejfj]

And that's exhibit A of why men are leaving church.

[@scottyyoch3537]

How should a man do better? How should a man live life? What sins should a man know? How does a man hold sins to account? Why is man on this earth? Questions rarely answered in church, in exchange for "good feelings" and "experience" These are the signs of a female-centered church Where the standard a woman judges by is assumed to be the correct standard.

[@Heartwing37]

@@Zayindjejfjgood comment! I would say that if that is true, then men (and women) aren’t going to church to worship God and build the Body of Christ. What has changed fundamentally in the structure of the church in the last 20, 30, or 50 years that has created barriers to men attending? The primary jobs in the church (pastors, deacons, bishops, teachers, altar boys, etc.) are male dominated roles. There are many churches that won’t even allow women to pray aloud during a service. So, my observation is that there are not a lack of opportunities and roles for men in a church vs those for women. My dreadful conclusion is that as the leader of spiritual institutions, (home, church) men are severing their relationship with God, and thus, see little value in worshipping Him. I don’t put this blame on the church or even one gender (because women have certainly contributed toward the breakup of Godly institutions), but I put the blame on the individuals themselves. We are to blame and as long as we have a poor or non-existent relationship with God, we will see no value in building up His Body. Just my humble opinion!

[@Heartwing37]

@@scottyyoch3537I’m sorry my friend to say this, but if those questions are not being asked in your church, you need to pick another church that does delve deeper into the “meat” instead of just feeding milk to a congregation! What you are describing is choosing style over substance and there are certainly both types of churches out there. My church DOES ask those meaningful, deeper questions. We DO look at the Bible from not only an informational point of view, but also from an applicational perspective. If that were not so, I would not be a member there. In spite of that fact, we are still 3:1 female to male. Many jobs go undone because men are not available to do them. I believe that our nation is spiritually ill and unless men work to repair their relationship with God, and reassert their roles as Godly leaders in the home, and in the family, then we are, indeed, in the midst of the Great Falling Away! Thank you far the conversation!

[@scottyyoch3537]

@@Heartwing37 my church does ask these questions regularly! I've seen many that do not, that operate with the assumption that women are inherently holier / more moral than men

[@dehsa38]

Search Tom Wadsworth! He' got some good ideas on this!!

[@jigary]

Is it possible that men are repelled by church for a few reasons? The western church isn’t disciplining people but making converts. And the convert model is a kin to fans. Jesus discipled men to ministry very well . And His model of discipleship was attractive to men. I think the way we retell the story of His ministry through movies and such is very feminine and wasn’t like how it played out in reality. It was more like military training than outdoor teatime. There is something in Christ’s model of discipleship that is missing today. He took men who were working and gave them a new job in the kingdom. They were fully Aware that it was a new job and positioning because then they were asking about ranking of their position after His kingdom is established. Discipleship was a demanding training that required rigor and sacrifice. Jesus actively rejected fickle and feeble people who sought to follow His. He was constantly raising the bar. Their ministry was productive and bore fruit that they could see. And they had some context that they were building something bigger than themselves. In essence, men are attracted to the kingdom and to the military. Jesus disciples them through that lens. Until we to return the gospel of Kingdom then we’ll continue to see an absence of men. I’ll also name that many of the men in churches are effeminate or weak. And no real man is going to join that type of leadership.

[@whatshatnin4572]

The main reason is because its mythology and Black Men are starting to realize that they were introduced to these myths by Christian slave masters

[@Scentedearthnaturals]

I just don't get why man want to feel appreciated like that, so much so that they stop coming for fellowship. Maybe they can start appreciating others and then be appreciated back. Start a conversation with other men in the church and create a community they will be be comfortable in. We do not go to church to be appreciated. Men cannot all be leaders in the church and this is what sounds like they want - to lead or have some special position in the church. And then it becomes more about them than about Christ

[@Smithdantzler193]

No one said be leaders 😂 same reason women want to feel appreciated. A jezebel would say what you claimed. The churches only tend to excoriate men as though women have no issues which is what the world does and bible says don't conform to world. To try and mitigate a man who God made the head is jezebel based but I know you wouldn't care because that's not in y'all's nature to even think about mens vantage point

[@calvinelias5439]

😍..

[@JaybLaynLo]

The whole thing of submission & worshiping a fake Jesus just doesn't appeal to me!

[@marklane61]

Wrong

[@karenpetty8552]

Get back faithful worship, are you going to the church because of worship or because you wanted to feel needed

[@TheTreyTvChannel]

personally I blame feminism...