Why Men Stopped Dating

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In today's video, I will give you the history of dating and why people are giving up on dating. Is being in a relationship worth it?
Timestamps:
0:00 - Why did men stop dating?
0:13 - What is dating?
0:31 - Arranged dating in countries
1:15 - Is it difficult to date now?
1:40 - Why is dating dying?
2:27 - Charity girls
3:18 - Marriage (Class system)
3:50 - True love
4:17 - Matchmakers
5:45 - What happened in 1959?
6:45 - When did online dating start?
7:17 - Why are people giving up on dating?
13:00 - Paradox of choice
16:38 - How does being in a romantic relationship make my life better?
17:39 - How should men be better?
20:54 - How does this equate to marriage?
21:30 - How I met my wife
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[@RealMenRealStyle]

🔴 www.vitaman.com/rmrs40 💥 Click to get up to 40% OFF Storewide (including Starter Kits!) 💥 Do you think modern dating is still worth it? Comment below! ➡ kzbin.info/www/bejne/i3bUqJ16ebpqoNU - Click here to watch Why Did Men Stop Wearing Capes? ➡ kzbin.info/www/bejne/oma8dmaGpd-lha8 - Click here to watch Why Men Stopped Wearing Mustaches

[@yeasashikder3704]

1ST Viewer

[@dr.redphdleasurestudies.5399]

Worth it? For myself? No. The kinds of women I would be interested in are already married and staying that way. Think of it this way, if all the shoes left in a store are just way too small you leave. You don't cut your toes off. You just leave.

[@baron7755]

I grew up in a church that taught courting

[@MasterZeeeee]

Hey who is this @text-5457 claming to have a random gift for me? They are all over YT at the moment, reported him so hope he goes away

[@BillClinton228]

I stopped dating when I befriended an attractive guy at work... the guy looked like a model and he never went to gym or did anything special to his appearance but he constantly had women at his place. He even laughed about it, he just had to get a dating app on his phone and the women would come directly to his house, he didnt need pay a cent. That's when I realized, if guys like him are getting laid for free why should I put in any effort? Besides, I've gotten to the age where female interaction doesn't mean much, I used t o jump through so many hoops in my early 20s just to get average women, now I just couldn't care less. Call me an incel or low-t... I'll cry on all the money I keep for myself🤣

[@V0ltron]

It isn't marriage men are avoiding. It's divorce.

[@RealMenRealStyle]

That's true!

[@Iwillroastthesocksoffyoass]

Nah I'm avoiding both.

[@BrokensoulRider]

@@Iwillroastthesocksoffyoass Dating isn't the bad part. It's the abuse and the divorce when women are done with them or are ready to 'trade up'. Woman here.

[@Iwillroastthesocksoffyoass]

@@BrokensoulRider Do you date women?

[@BrokensoulRider]

@@Iwillroastthesocksoffyoass I tried to, but I found that either it's me, or I just have something about me that brings out the worst around other women save for a small handful. I'm not pretty or anything, I actually have a personality that I am trying to better, as well as my weight. But I've met so many emotionally/mentally abusive women over the years I'm basically straight now. I'm not, I still find women attractive, but I can't date them. Too many I knew/know/will one day know have been manipulative and liars.

[@edricdayne3571]

My dad told me "Son, the number one cause of divorce is marriage. Choose wisely"

[@MoulayAbdsamadBelghiti]

😆 you have a good wise old man; long life to him 😆 More seriously, I see that "marriage", like many other concepts, has been completely corrupted. Words have been screwed.

[@cookiediangelo8511]

*number one predicter (sounds better)

[@jeffcauhape6880]

My father's cousin on the topic of marriage: "The screwing you're getting is not worth the screwing you're getting."

[@lancemurdoc6744]

As Jerry "the King" Lawler said, "men does"nt know what true happiness is until they get married...and than it's too late".

[@kennymccormick9594]

@@lancemurdoc6744 then good ole JR would say something like; "bah gawd Jerry you're absolutely right!"

[@BigSneed404]

I'm 30 now and one of the harshest lessons I've learned in life is that all those legitimately good and constructive aspirations I had are just not realistic anymore. I want a house? Better work 5AM to 10PM daily for a decade. It's not worth it. Want to get married? Good luck finding a woman who will "settle" for me and surviving the 50/50 dice roll of happiness or losing what little I have in a divorce court. Not worth it. Past generations call me lazy. I call it a basic cost-risk-benefit analysis, and that's not the way it should be.

[@TheMusicmak3r]

Unless your John Redcorn

[@DoporaBHe6o]

same. and more I live more I realize how much unrealistic bs I've been fed earlier in life.

[@PerfectAlibi1]

Yeah, divorce laws are heavily in favour of the woman. So if the marriage breaks, the man is screwed...

[@tobiaskissel6303]

We got the shit end of the stick. All i am going to do is improve myself for myself. Not going to jump into anything quickly.

[@user-ko5ul7yi1x]

That's another sad part of it: "A woman who will settle" Jesus, we're just pawns to them, it's not worth it at all.

[@mhw0508]

When I left the Marine Corps (2008) The Number 1 piece of advice I was given by most of the men I met in the real world was "Don't get married" this from single all the way to divorced and everyone in between...I took that advice.... It didn't take long to see with my own eyes the Hellscape of marriage and dating I could write a book with all the horror stories.. Everytime I saw it I just said to myself "glad it's not me"

[@GameSlayerVideos1442]

Go on brother, make the book, we need more awareness on this issue

[@faethe000]

Being able to be happy single is a valuable life skill. It means that even if you do get into a relationship, you won't suffer in it out of fear of being alone.

[@jamesstrom6991]

If you do, get a prenup so divorce doesn’t cost you much.

[@LoneWolfArtist]

​@@jamesstrom6991kids ... Destroys the prenup and she gets them, house, money and can skip state to ensure you are nothing but a check

[@LoneWolfArtist]

​@@jamesstrom6991Prenup with tubes tied ... If she gets pregnant it's not uours

[@revenant4252]

There was one girl I went on a date with just before lockdown where we got on the topic of what we were looking for and she wanted to be polyamorous BUT she wanted me to stay mono with her. I was like "....WHAT!?" yeah she wanted to sleep around with her friends but wanted me to sleep ONLY with her....that was a new one for me lol

[@zachturner8745]

She wants to have the worlds lowest SMV.

[@V0ltron]

I could choose a couple of words, in poor taste. That being said, she's "fast."

[@EJ_Red]

If she ever brings up being in a poly- whatever "relationship" then chances are she will cheat and just wants consent for it, you dodged a bullet

[@alrbredwall]

This is the delusion of modern day women. It's better to die alone.

[@taylorlibby7642]

I was in a relationship like that!! It's just that I was the last person to know it!

[@Snake-filledChimp]

I tried my hand at marriage, had an 8-year relationship (4-year marriage) with my now ex-wife, and had 2 kids. We had a good marital home, good jobs, and my parents living nearby who provided no-cost childcare... she ditched me out of the blue one day because she "wasn't happy anymore" and "needed freedom and space" and "wasn't getting what she needed from me". Seriously, she just cut out like I was a f***ing high school boyfriend or something. She refused counseling and every attempt to save our marriage. 4 months later (still married to me) she had a live-in boyfriend and just kinda moved on as if nothing happened for the previous 8 years. I was completely obliterated and still am in some ways almost 3 years later. Now I'm super black-pilled on marriage, and women in general, frankly. You think you know someone so well that you pledge the rest of your life to them... and they walk away like you are a piece of trash. I don't need that and I won't risk that again. No-fault divorce has destroyed marriage.

[@xerf84]

MGTOW

[@annroousivakumar2819]

Nice we got a new member

[@williamsheehan260]

She had that boyfriend before she left you. Good riddance

[@jdhstyles]

Hmm

[@easyyo6784]

thats sound horrible, im sorry for that happen.

[@Peleski]

I think the elephant in the room is, why should dating apps want to see you being successful? You'd stop using their service.

[@vettemuziekjes]

When you have to use an app, you obviously suck at relation skills.

[@rerikm]

⁠not really. It's just way more convenient. going out to meet someone takes hours and you may not meet anyone but you can use Bumble while you poop and maybe you get some matches. That alone is a huge advantage. I have been having some luck in Bumble but I also get picky so I haven't had a relationship from any of those dates. I'm fortunate and skillful enough to get a second date every time and I expect the girl to pay for that. Otherwise I won't see her again.

[@drby0788]

@vettemuziekjes that's the way it is today. Person to person doesn't have the same affect that it used to, and in .most cases works against you more than for you

[@hollow7592]

Wrong. I quit using these apps EXACTLY because I wasn't having any success there. If I had, I would never have left.

[@Peleski]

@@hollow7592 You're a sample size of 1

[@beverlylooper3927]

My parents and grandparents didn't even define love the same way we do now. We think of it as a passion but they considered it to be the daily devotion you gave to your family and your life together.

[@rickpaul8012]

yeah your grandparents were misguided. This is reality, social conventions are built on nothing. This world is garbage.

[@perliva]

Peter Hitchens once said it very well: _“The principal woe of our age in this immensely lucky wealthy stable and happy country is the decision in the past 40 years to abandon the idea of lifelong marriage and it was done largely and officially on the basis that there would be too many people trapped in unhappy marriages who need to be released._ _But actually on the basis that people preferred their own pleasure and their own self-indulgence to the care of their children. We have become a society which in many significant ways will put its own pleasure and self-satisfaction ahead of duty.”_

[@Auror2k05]

Real love doesn't exist anymore. It died long ago. What we call "love" today is a barter system. It's like "You give me this, I will give you that". And if you fail to provide something, boom. You will be ghosted and replaced with somebody else. This cycle never ends.

[@masonreppeto882]

@@perliva There's no such thing as born from the sack duties. There are however responsibilities that you make for yourself. Most women grew up not having to face any kind of real pain or suffering, so the majority act like children with no accountability. This even applies to the baby boomers and prior. All the ww2 generation women had to do was man the factories for maybe 3 and a half years. Then all of a sudden they started demanding the right to vote despite not actually suffering real hardship. I don't think women have really learned anything of importance or taught the next generation of women on how to act, considering the mentality of the average woman. Sometimes, I wonder if women are even capable of true accountability.

[@masonreppeto882]

@@Auror2k05 It was always a barter system but it's become lop-sided in favor of women. No longer can you expect 100% if you give 100%.

[@Checkmate9moves]

I've been actively dating for the past 3 years looking for a wife after spending my 20's and early 30's becoming a stable man. I've been on 67 1st dates in that time. The common theme I've noticed nowadays is these 3; 1) They can't cook anymore 2) They're all travelers 3) They want to be in a relationship but act like they're still single

[@KBowWow75]

I hope to give up way before 67 tries. I'd save a ton of money too.

[@EJ_Red]

Props to you for still trying, I would have given up halfway through

[@Iwillroastthesocksoffyoass]

Get a Passport and make things easier on yourself.

[@BrokensoulRider]

I hope you are able to find someone for you. :( I'm in a good relationship myself right now. He's not pretty, but he fit all the criteria that I had, and despite our fights now and then... I can't say I've ever been so happy to say 'I'm taken' than I have since 2019.

[@Dartht33bagger]

I swear if I read one more profile that mentions traveling or dogs....

[@JAKEBrakeModel94]

I am 28 and I never expected dating to be this hard. I am what many would call traditionally attractive, college-educated, fit, over 6 feet and it’s still rough. The part that sucks is you can do everything right, but if the girl has the slightest inkling that there’s another guy better, she will try to seek out that other guy. Guys don’t even have to be participating in online dating to be affected by it. Instead of competing between friend groups and social circles, you are now competing with other guys across state lines and potentially across the freaking world. It’s cutthroat.

[@Sagefrakrobatik]

I know exactly what you mean, this happened to me recently, I was getting to know this girl at my job, (Target), after about a month I asked her out. judging from our interactions, I assumed she was interested so I went for it. She gave me her number but ended ghost after two messages. since, then she rarely initiates conversation or makes eye contact. At one point she mentioned a friend of hers who just became a pilot, so I'm kind wondering if they have something going on.

[@britneybij3997]

You'll be fine

[@doctordetroit4339]

Stick around...you are almost 30. I speak from experience. Once you get north of 30....you will see what I mean. The script flips. Entirely. Women think they are going to be 25 forever. Can't blame them....all they have known is privilege throughout their lives. But the wall takes no prisoners.

[@Sagefrakrobatik]

@@cristobal.palmero4919 why not just use a different dating app altogether? there are atleast a thousand to choose from

[@brianbadonde8700]

wait until they hit the wall at 35 especially if they've no kids, but if they're a single mother they're fucked too, and you're still in your prime as a man, women peak in their early 20s and are very choosy, men peak later in their 30s to 40s especially if they take care of themselves and have been working hard, relax and work on you and you'll be the one doing the choosing in your 30s believe me it changes real fast for women, men get more content as they get older that is certainly not the case with women, a man's peak comes much later and lasts longer, God it's great to be a man😎

[@DeadCat-42]

It's a strange game, the only winning move is not to play.

[@benayers8622]

facts cant be honest they go cold and why would you wanna play mind games to push pull someone constantly to satisfy their dopamine addiction cos we all know without the feels its game over time or loyalty isnt something they understand in the slightest

[@admtech69]

Went out with a woman who treated waitstaff horribly, broke up with her that night. Went back to the same restaurant and tipped the staff generously. Guys, remember, how she treats the waitstaff will be how she will treat you in the future. Dodged that bullet.

[@bobnelson5700]

The most common phrases that I get are: " I have a boyfriend, so no." or ""Why would I date you, you're not anyone that someone would want to date." among many others. I even had someone tell me this "Men have it easier to get dates." that was one of the biggest lies I have been told about dating.

[@thomasmaresh5264]

Every nice looking female tells me within thirty seconds about her boyfriend/husband. LIke they are terrified of my nice clothes and my confidence.

[@junipervip681]

It's the same for women, but the comment is more like: "I'm married so let's just have sex." At least men don't get told "You're obviously a 'ho' for asking for a date, so let's just have sex".

[@lazybill5830]

@@junipervip681 That sucks I hope you find someone.

[@Sagefrakrobatik]

@@thomasmaresh5264 Bro, I got you beat, 10 seconds for me.

[@9alt0]

Women get told the exact same things 🤷‍♂️. I've used that first line even when I was single. It's just easier.

[@TheEvoHero]

I’m 29, 6’4, 190lbs, blonde, blue eyed, I make over six figures, I’m conservative Christian, above average mug, and I can’t find a single Christian woman that isn’t either a dog or has an insane level of expectation for their future partner. They expect everything and want to give so little or nothing. Dating is disappointing.

[@Detman101]

Women are one thing that has not changed since I started dating in the 90's. Sorry to hear you're dealing with the same stupidity that I had to deal with in my time. As men, I don't know what the absolute solution is...but I know that ignoring women and trusting God to lead me to the right woman worked for me. I met someone who was on the same level as me, strong in the faith and devoted to doing right. I'm no supermodel and neither is she, but we're great together!

[@Detman101]

@Browsing Sending up a prayer for ya man, it's a shame when a guy that has his act together and is standing on his own can't get what's due.

[@ericpalomino4678]

It's the spirit of jezebel that is in them that drives them away from a true Godly man

[@kletts42]

I feel for you, guys. I am a Christian man and I found a wife on E-harmony (not a plug) and I know I was one of the "lucky" ones. I am thankful I don't have to go through any of this.

[@ChineseChicken1]

Finding a True Christian Woman is literally like trying to find a needle in a haystack. I've been looking for years. Found a couple "Christian" Women who turned out to be just like the rest.

[@justinthislife]

I'm single at 30 Statistically I've avoided my first divorce.

[@vettemuziekjes]

LOL

[@ex1st.here.994]

Irl wizard

[@justinthislife]

@@ex1st.here.994 Was engaged bud, also I dated before I knew better.

[@Lorendrawn]

W

[@johndang887]

W

[@vincebrogan2878]

If marriage were anything else, an attorney would look at everything involved and tell you to run away from one of the worst deals he'd ever seen.

[@92alpha13]

My son met his wife at a food pantry for the homeless. They worked with each other for a year. He went to Europe for an internship after college. She came and volunteered in our daycare. Polite and feminine young lady. Super smart with awkward since of humor. He came home and I grabbed him by his shoulders and said marry this woman Now! He did and I will be a 50 year old PawPaw in February!

[@EJ_Red]

Congratulations dude!

[@penultimateh766]

Yeah this sounds edited. Their memory might differ.

[@goldenboymp5200]

Congratulations! Marriage and family is a beautiful thing when it works out. I wish them all the best.

[@jonathanr7086]

@@penultimateh766 what does this even mean? Do you somehow know this dude's story better than he does?

@@jonathanr7086 That user may be a bot. There seem to be more and more of those in the comments sections.

[@maplemayhem1988]

Heartbreak sucks and 70% of the time she's willing to put you through it without telling you a thing.

[@conicEllipse]

I'm in my mid-50s. Was married for nearly 27 years. I thought we were going to go the distance. I thought we were going to be the 1-in-10. Nope. I'm one of the 9-in-10. I recommend against marriage. It's not worth it.

[@leftenantthunder]

what happened?

[@andre1987eph]

Yup. Tons of guys in the comment section, "My wife is wonderful. Been married for 26 years. She's the exception" the following year they find out she's not. 😅

[@isiahwashington2999]

Right with you brother. Divorced women poison the well.

[@island717]

I’m a bit younger but very similar story here mate. I thought we were 1 in a million. Still my multi-decade happy marriage ended up in ruins leaving me completely destroyed. You know how they say “you never really know a woman until she divorces you” well that is true. It’s not worth it. Not in this day and age.

[@island717]

@@andre1987ephyep, can confirm I was one of those guys before. Truly believed I won a lottery ticket and was in a truly exceptional relationship. Nope, as it turns out I was blind and none of those things were true, I’m part of statistics now. But hey, we live we learn. I’m a happy human being now again and I’m not going to repeat that mistake again.

[@Sick_Pencil]

Men didn't stop dating, they CANNOT date. The struggle to find a woman who will date you shrinks exponentially. Last year, I had only 3 dates which none worked. I approached several women who would give me their numbers after a nice talk, only to ghost me or tell me they are not interested. I am not refraining from dating. I simply can't find someone who is worth it or willing to date me.

[@Kyle906-Q8]

Sounds fairly true. Statistics is only half the story.

[@BroughtCat]

They're not willing to give guys a shot at a date anymore, it's fucking B.S. Look if you act like a jackass or a prick on the date and she doesn't have any interest that's on you. However, nowadays you can even get to "the date" despite if you're a normal nice dude.

[@wetwillyis_1881]

Well, you’re one date up on me, brother. I have the same issue, and it’s nice to see others like me. I’m looking for the same thing, too. Just someone to be with and love, not this endless meaningless sex, and modern bullshit.

[@TheeMostDangerousOne]

Naww i stopped dating

[@Dinrog]

exactly my experience brother. ever since covid especially, i had 0 luck even tho i actively approach women i like out and about. just excuses, ghosting.. not that i had much luck before covid either, but at least there were periodic dates (i could get ghosted after lol) at this point i just can't justify the time i waste on this stuff anymore..

[@Cyber-Rain]

I've noticed an increase of "She wanted an open relationship and it didn't end well." stories. A lot of them worry too much if the grass is greener on the other side. They didn't even bother to work on their own lawn to get it as green as they want. Unchecked hypergamy will be their undoing.

[@innovacraft]

She says "I would like an open relationship" she just wants to introduce you to her boyfriend. DUMP HER NOW!!

[@xx-cj6ew]

Agree, and it's sad, because open relationships / ENM can and do work, but it requires very rigorous study and execution, ceaseless self improvement and psychological healing, and the goal of having relationships for the relationships themselves and not for ulterior reasons (or to at least communicate, i.e. "Hey I wanna have a partner strictly for kids and nothing else, any takers?") The vast majority of people simply can't execute on the theory. A skill issue, so to speak.

[@jl6693]

@@innovacraft just curious, you meant "boyfriend" or "boyfriends"? :)))))

[@AbuBased731]

@@xx-cj6ew No they don't lmao

[@elonever.2.071]

@@innovacraft And the chances are you will be raising the boyfriends kids as your own.

[@pouglwaw5932]

I brought a box of dollar store toys to an orphanage in Guatemala at Christmas. Kids were hugging and thanking me with tears in their eyes. Some were dancing around holding their $1 toy to their chest. There are so many children in this world who need and respond to even the smallest expression of love and care that nobody needs to be in a toxic relationship to find this feeling of ":family", Those kids cried when I had to leave, but I'm sending a box every month with individual gifts till I can return I'm also sponsoring a fiesta [party] there every month, with food and decorations. Love is showing that you care and that's what saves lives- theirs and mine.

[@travisn346]

I sent Christmas cards that I designed and toys to the kids and nurses at the children's hospital. Felt better doing that than anything I've done for myself.

[@rvh1702]

Damn this was so heart warming to read!! I'm wishing you all the best and if there is a god, may he only bring good in your life!

[@michaelsix9684]

love is the glad fulfilling of another's needs ,you did that, and love erupted, great story

[@alexmuenster2102]

>>Love is showing that you care and that's what saves lives- theirs and mine.

[@gerhardusvanderpoll]

I have found that the only human beings that are worth while on this planet are children.They are innocent,inquisitive,and love life without any prejudices.They are dependent and vulnerable and deserve all the protection and kindness that can be afforded to them.Unfortunately some have no choice in having been born to incompetent,drug addicted,alcoholic and irresponsible ,sometimes,cruel and neglectful parents.Thus so many of them are unknowingly doomed even before the journey of their lives have started off. Breaks my heart...there a literally millions of them.I try also to assist with food,clothes and toys etc.,but I feel totally helpless in the face of the enormity of the problem.Can only add a drop in the bucket due to a limited small pension.And any money that I do give to the parents gets waisted on drugs and the like...or mismanaged without any benefit to the children...My greatest reward is in seeing them light up on receipt of food or a toy...totally unspoilt,greatful and unaware of their precarious position in life.,running up to me to hug,shouting: "We love you uncle G"...These kids live in derelict horse stables, without running water and electricity in unhygienic circumstances,with rats as large as cats running around...Drug trading,gangsters and gang fights rounds the picture off...Greetings from Cape Town.

[@waynycely91]

Meh, I opted out of dating over a decade ago. Best decision I've ever made. There's no point in competing in a cut-throat competition against other men for a woman that will hate and blame you as the reason her life isn't a pure luxury and leisure fantasy she saw in some retarded Disney movie.

[@lovrovalentic3056]

I am copying your description , soo on point.

[@vettemuziekjes]

like they think they live in that "grease" movie with john travolta or some brainwashed crap like that.

[@forman208]

If the right girl comes along great, but to me it's SO much better to be single than chasing after women with ridiculous expectations.

[@rickpaul8012]

I took psychology courses in school in majority female classes. They literally do thing theyre in Disney movies. Shocked by how immature and childish woman are actually @@vettemuziekjes

[@rickpaul8012]

hit and quit man. Get yours and dump the losers@@forman208

[@xychoticbreak5198]

It's not like winning the lottery. It's like surviving dancing through a minefield.

[@Keith-rd2uh]

Remember to report spam comments to google to help prevent phishing attacks

[@danf4447]

man thats good. i gotta write that down!

[@MrGchiasson]

Dancing through a minefield...and then...you pay for the privilege.

[@yuriimarshalofficial]

And then you blow up with break up.

[@junfour]

And there's more mine than field.

[@V0ltron]

Only a woman, children and dogs are loved unconditionally. A man is only loved under the condition that he provide something. This is why sons love their Mothers so much, because they are the only women in their lives that love them unconditionally.

[@RealMenRealStyle]

[@KBowWow75]

I love being a provider. It makes me feel like... a man.

[@noneofyourbiz6885]

Well women need a man to lead them. Find a woman and train her to be your wife and I guess in order to do that you’ll need some training yourself. Maybe pick up a Bible 🤷‍♂️

[@V0ltron]

@@noneofyourbiz6885 You had to "train" your wife? You mean she doesn't do the things you prefer or like because she loves or likes you? Don't know about that one.

[@ricflair4052]

that's a page from "Chris Rock"

[@B78p1neus]

Genuine people are harder to find. Social media has watered down the excitement of meeting new people

[@jamesondoggomus4023]

I’m not a super Casanova, but I’ve had success with women, and dating has become impossible. Just had an experience where a girl was giving me all the cues; eye contact, smiling, showing interest in what I do, initiating conversation, etc… so I gave her my number and she instantly switched to ice. I can handle rejection but this time it spread to others and impacted my reputation. I’m not a gambling man, so I’ve resolved to stop approaching women altogether, I’m just going to focus on downhill longboarding and publishing my next book. There are no plans for a relationship from here on, I’m out and off to enjoy life.

[@di3486]

Stop pursuing “girls” and get to know women.

[@22varian1]

Dude I've really wanted to get into downhill longboarding, please post some content!

[@ap-dh8md]

@@di3486 he literally used the word women twice, and "girl" once. You know it's a common colloquial term even among women describing themselves? When did common speech become a battlefield?

[@martinrhoads6168]

I am 73yrs old and happily married. Married late in life (in my 40's). Dated the usual way, and just by dumb luck found a wonderful wife. I think dating to get to know someone is crazy. For a bunch of reasons. While you are dating everyone is on their best behavior. That's unreal. Then you are dating one person, spending alot of time and money, only to end it , because the odds are you will. Everyone gets hurt . Who wants to do that again. People need to meet prospects in a neutral, more stress free environment , where everyone can be more of themselves. Find something you like to do where you have an opportunity to meet others. Church (I am an Atheist myself, but...), groups that have a common interest. Hiking, photography, astronomy, theater, canoeing, dinner clubs, cooking. Something like that. Good luck!

[@MoulayAbdsamadBelghiti]

Interesting... I often though that on social media we should be able to put our age (verified) so that the perspectives on life are balanced; Too often the demographics are 30-40s and, on these issues in particular, we are in the same "tunnel". Thanks for sharing your perspective.

[@dragoneyr1632]

Aww it's lovely to find an old sailor that has sailed the seas to know it all at this point and just be so... down to earth about it. Love it

[@FactStorm]

Great point, although I have to be a pain here and say that we shouldn't encourage theistic delusions and sectarianism. I get every individual seeks what they want..I guess you're nicer than me in offering people of faith a place to find one another. Where does that leave us nonbelievers? Most of the world already thinks lowly of us and equates atheism with immorality.

[@MoulayAbdsamadBelghiti]

@@FactStorm I think you are a denier not a nonbeliever, and I am really not saying that with grief or to embarrass you; Rather, it's because you believe in God that you don't feel any space is left; if you did not believe in God, why would you take Him into account? I know a lot have gone through traumatic experiences, especially in childhood, when it comes to faith, but maybe give yourself another chance with Him. Try other ways. Maybe start with morality, where you are, and track back from there. All the best.

[@FactStorm]

@@MoulayAbdsamadBelghiti *Yawns*..typical religious person with his bs

[@TheSidahmed61]

Men also avoid being hurt as well. There's only so much trauma and pain men can deal with before they have enough.

[@IchibanOjousama]

What pain

[@paulwilliams5013]

@@IchibanOjousama ..the 'pain' of going for, what is essentially, a job interview, not getting the job and maybe paying for the 'privilege' Dating seems to have become a hobby for women..easy come, easy go. Keep swiping girls.....next!!

[@Auror2k05]

​@@IchibanOjousamaThe pain of being treated like a disposable item.

[@slimbrady6004]

My dad just got a divorce and let me tell y’all, I’m 23 and NEVER getting married. Thank god I saw the truth before getting tricked into it. I would like to eventually find a life partner, but our relationship is not going to be part of the legal system.

[@anthonylulham3473]

and the state will treat you as common law married and still take anything it can.

[@user-ex6nd8dq8w]

@@anthonylulham3473 If they do not cohabitate, then it won't. However if he has a kid with a woman who does not cohabitate, still he is liable - sure as he should be, but then the woman can make the state dictate the amount he is liable, not him in person. And often the state dictates sums of money which are not at all relevant to the kid but rather meant as a transfer of wealth from men to women. The latter becomes obvious when the legal system ties a kid's "cost of living" not to the actual needs of any kid, but rather to the earnings (and in some western countries, worse, to the earning potential of men). To comprehend how much the state chases men, it fought men not marrying by introducing "common law marriage", i.e. automatically brand the man "married" if he cohabitated with the woman (and even if they do not have kids together - even tying in many cases her kids from previous relationships to the man, which is absurd). Then it extended that cohabitation even to partial cohabitation, i.e. it just suffices for the woman to leave her toothbrush in your house and hooopla "cohabitation"! LOL! And then, lawmakers in some western countries noticed that plenty of men post divorce started not caring, they lost interest in their careers as they did not need much money for themselves and downgraded their jobs, taking easier jobs or going on periods of unemployment and short term employment (e.g. many enjoying their money going on holidays, sex-tourism etc.) and so what did they do? They did not tie the alimonies and allowances to the mens' earnings but to their..... potential earnings considering their past profession and what they can get in the market. This is not done in all western countries but in quite some and it is also discussed in those that the measure is not yet on to the point that women there also try to impose it legally by keep on suing the men for more.

[@elonever.2.071]

@@anthonylulham3473 North Carolina has no common law marriage statute. I am sure there are others do your research for something that important.

[@Nobody90019]

@@anthonylulham3473 Exactly

[@ReckSaber3664]

I am absolutely scared to be married. I have seen so many divorces in my lifetime. I don’t think it’s worth it anymore.

[@brianjones9780]

Marriage lasts the longest when the couple has mutual goals. Love fades, but a mutual goal holds people together even when their feelings aren't in it. Eventually they may even come to love each other off and on as time goes by. This is simply how marriages used to function for centuries.

[@samuelntim-addae2843]

And that used to be the kids. But now people have been told to prioritize themselves over everyone else.

[@chrisblanc663]

I see what you mean, again assuming you mean the goal of rearing children. My wife and I love each other, and make sure our kids see that we love each other by a bit of pda, but primarily showing each other respect, team work, and service in front of our kids.

[@Cahluvca]

Duty, sacrifice and work in a individualistic culture = current environment results

[@dmav522]

I love this video, but two things still need to be included: Ghosting. I can't begin to count the number of times I've been ghosted after a couple convos. Also, the ridiculous double standards women are allowed to have in terms of a potential match (he must be 6ft, jacked, a 10 etc. etc.) Yet when we say we have preferences like wanting a woman who takes care of herself is fit and active and fits YOUR PREFERENCE in terms of body type, we get called out for being sexist or misogynistic.

[@JohnSkyLey]

Exactly

[@Rhetoricalact]

You should call her out for being a double standard sexist too. That's the true sexual equality.

[@britneybij3997]

Let people have their preferences because it can be helpful to everyone else. Be it a guy or a girl, regardless of orientation, having preferences that can be considered "toxic", let them voice that because it makes it easier to filter through them anyway. At the end of the day the only ones being affected by their "toxic" standards are themselves. Be it they end up getting no one because their preferences are so specific, or their relationships become only surface level and temporary because they prioritize things that are only surface lvl & temporary. The only way anyone would be upset about someone's preferences is if they don't meet those preferences and badly desire that person or want to be those preferences anyway. Either that person will come to realization that maybe they should take a chance on compromising or they will take the L quietly and be alone. Don't be mad when people wave their red flags, you waste less time and energy.

[@dojocho1894]

when you have to get to know someone in person it exposes who they really are..or aren't. women have no confidence so social media makes them into super stars but in real life they are a dud.

[@caseypayne5138]

So get to the gym and watch yourself get ghosted less?

[@TheCritter001]

It's called hoeflation. You have to bring 8x more to a possible relationship than your grandfather did to get a woman that brings 8x less to the table than grandmother did

[@vettemuziekjes]

Hoeflation, I like it 👍

[@johnnygodto5688]

100% true. When hundreds of thousands of men independently come to the same conclusion after experiencing the dating market, there has to be some underlying truth.

[@mhw0508]

you nailed it

[@TrickOrRetreat]

Hoeflation 🤔You know what ? that describes it perfectly.

[@wayneswanson3294]

there's a KZbinr with the name "hoe_math" that explains the dynamics perfectly and in great detail.

[@BroughtCat]

I'm 22 and a few months back, i started talking to a girl through one of the online dating sites. She wasnt my type, and we had some similar culture, but I was really to look past that type of superficiality. There were a couple of red flags that i ignored because this girl was the first girl that was affectionate with me in a romantic way. She lied about her famial past, despite me giving her plenty of opportunities for her to come clean. However, i had my blinders on. Receiving a text saying "hey cutie" or "hi handsome" made me feel loved and special. I became hooked. Even if it was a cute love emoji, I devoured it because she was giving me romantic attention. We finally agreed upon a time and date to meet. I showed up early, but she texted me she was gonna be a little late. I wasn't upset, stuff happens. I waited 5 minutes and she texted that her mom needed help with something, and it might take 20 minutes. I told her I was already at the meet up waiting for her. At that point I was mad and didn't want to see her, but i wanted to remain professional. An HOUR went by, I texted her asking about her status. She texted me back one word, "raincheck." I was levid, we agrued for a bit and she had the audacity to blame me and wanted to break things off before anything even started. I blocked her cell number and on the dating app. However, before I blocked her on the dating app, there she was back on the scene looking for someone. It's fucking hopless. Funny how all the cute blondes and brunettes are going for thugs and degenerates, but if you're an in shape college educated guy with Chris Hemsworth looks these girls turn their blinders on. Well guess its time to become a Mediterranean Passport Bro and find a beautiful normal and traditional Greco-Roman wife.

[@DUDEAKATOREI]

I live in Japan, but the "winner takes all" effect really hits hard in areas like Tokyo, where MILLIONS of people can quickly meet each other via advanced public transport system. There are 13 million people living in Tokyo and that doesn't include millions living in adjacent areas that can get to central Tokyo in less than an hour. Plus, Tokyo is the center of Japanese economy meaning that billionaires and celebrities live there too. Almost any girl can hook up with young millionaires on Tinder and go see them in 30 minutes for like $5 and that becomes their "expectations". Even if you can't find a date, Tokyo is still the center of Japanese society, economy, culture, etc. so there are countless ways to entertain yourself. Therefore it's very natural that many men choose not to date anyone and enjoy their own lives.

[@nyahhbinghi]

yes yes, hypergamy kills

[@Auror2k05]

So it's not just the west, but the entire world suffering

[@Sohelanthropus]

As a 21 yo bloke who constantly works outs, doesn't do drugs, doesn't drink or go to parties (I have like 1 friend I see once a month and we only buy snacks and talk in the park💀), does well in school and a decent job for my age; it's hard man, and scary, to be cheated on or being played on or having to bend yourself and also play these stupid texting and flirting games, the "push n pull" bs and all that other modern mumbo jumbo I don't have the mental capacity nor the time to do all that bullshit just to have a slight chance to get a girl, it is tiring

[@Tom-si5ec]

I got my act together too and I am a bit jaded, so I don't hit on chics very often. The girls are loyal to dirtbags though. I know a guy with 3 babies to 2 different girls and he ghosted his current girlfriend on Thanksgiving and she still is loyal. I get hit on by women and cave in and they are nuts. Get a neck tat or a felony.

[@blakekenley1000]

My mother is in her third relationship, the previous two guys are dead, the first being my father. She didn't kill them, but she did use them both up right until they died. Took them for everything they had and just a bit more. She was consistently negligent and rude to me, as if I always would owe her something. She used to scream at me and say I'd never have a girlfriend, my reaction one day was "well if this is what it's going to be like, I don't want one." So that ended that little nugget of mental/emotional abuse I received constantly. Mind you I'm 30 at writing this post. Now I'm just horrified of women. I've been out in the dating world, the last few nearly broke me. #1 was both physically and emotionally abusive. #2 emotionally abusive, #3 emotionally abusive. All three would poke and prod until they figured out things they could use against me and it was game on from the start with the attempts at manipulation.

[@tramlink8544]

Sounds like youre not very good at noticing red flags in women. Work on noticing certain signs that Controlling/abusive women give off and youre bound to find an emotionally sane woman :)

[@blakekenley1000]

@@tramlink8544 it's all red flags when you're 30. Besides, I live in a rural area, most of the women take off and don't come back. There's like, 1 female for every 3 males here. I chose to come back a few years ago after a breakup, haven't had much luck since. Not really forcing it either.

[@ceoelektronika8604]

You have never been to the Philippines, I can tell.

[@TimErwin]

Blake, therapy is needed. You've been through a lot and it's impossible to process on your own. The fact that you've kept attracting the same kind of women shows something is wrong. We tend to recreate the same environments in our childhoods, even if we don't mean to. It's not your fault for having a bad childhood and an abusive mother. It's impossible to sort that out yourself without a licensed therapist. Wishing you well.

[@ceoelektronika8604]

Virgins are not like that anywhere near as much. Clapped out whores are.

[@abhisheksamriwal5932]

My parents had an arrange marrage they were completely different and growing up they had a lot of arguments but 28 years into it they are still going strong

[@honorguard7616]

Being honest, put two people together long enough & there will be a deal of arguments, question is mainly how they feel about the arguements afterwards & so on

[@cvinthe2255]

Way too much female entitlement, unrealistic expectations, and negative attitudes together with waves and waves of simps, and you have the current dating situation. smh

[@ajstyyled4560]

I haven't been on a date in years. I just personally don't see what value it adds to my life. I'm someone who likes their solitude and quiet. I spent the earlier part of my life worrying about everyone else and trying to make everyone else happy. Now it's my time, and I don't really mind being selfish. My career is really the only thing I make time for. There's nothing really in a relationship that I feel like I need. It just feels like it's the expectations society has for us.

[@airthrowDBT]

I could've wrote this 1000%. I'm open to a relationship...if someone wants to sell me on the idea LOL

[@FactStorm]

Nothing selfish about taking care of yourself..in fact it is the opposite. It's anything but..

[@chanelpearls]

I am you and you are me

[@FactStorm]

I like the forthrightness, I will share no matter if people think this is tmi, I am just letting it out because I have to. I haven't gotten laid since July of last year, and that's not even close to my longest dry spell. I've gone years at some point. I feel the same way as you, I like my peace & quiet and don't see the value dating/relationships add to my life, I get the anthropological advantages (company makes you happier, provides social support, makes you live longer etc.) I envy you in that you used to worry about what everyone else is doing, I still do because I compare myself to others around me & who are my age..I see what your average Joe has accomplished/done & It makes me feel like sh|t. I know people who are highly educated (I barely have an undergrad), who go on dates constantly and have bedded close to 100 women, if not more. My figure hasn't even reached 20. Career matters because its your livelihood, and in this day & age - if you aren't part of a certain income bracket, then you are immediately excluded by certain segments of society. I make less than 55k/year but at least I don't have any debt, I pay my bills on time and have a great credit score. Even though I want to date more, a part of me hinders me. Even if I go on one soon, my psyche will prevent me from having a good time and women pick up on that easily. I will forgo the charm, and nonchalant expectation from dating..and will thus, disappoint/turn off the woman in question. I honestly stopped caring in many ways, I am just living my day to day life without expectations. I have a small group of friends and many more acquaintances. I don't know if I am ok with it, or if I have forced myself to come to accept my status. F society's expectations..who the hell are they to place stipulations on what we should or shouldn't do? I am tired of it all. I have considered how to face the possibility of lifelong celibacy & loneliness, just in case it happens..I am preparing for that. I know its all up to me, I am not trying to blame anyone for my problems..but I genuinely feel disheartened in life. We have primal needs (shelter, intimacy, livelihood) and many of those aren't being met, so biology will put me down for not meeting these needs..but so be it. Thanks for reading.

[@winterwulf1995]

The only things dating will add to your life are stress and expenses

[@BranniganCarter]

Just got out of a relationship with a textbook narcissist. First time I’ve been single in over a decade and the solitude is priceless

[@digitalduch1111]

I know that feeling!

[@davidhalldurham]

Glad you made it out alive!

[@GoodTimeBikes]

I can relate. I’m single as of 6 months ago after a 12 yr relationship. I thought I’d be more sad about my situation but I’m not, I’m actually in a pretty good mood/state of mind lol

[@BranniganCarter]

@@GoodTimeBikes man, freedom is so weird haha

[@rppope1006]

mgtow monk will bless you with the best possible life that god has planned for you.

[@e_squared604]

I stopped dating and pursuing women because the return on investment was appalling. I was spending so much time consuming dating advice content on youtube, I spent a lot of money on courses on how to please women sexually and I was investing a lot of time and effort to approach women in public and on dating apps. The results were desperate - I only rarely succeeded in getting women on dates. I found the women I was meeting were solipsistic, entitled and were often downright nasty with no sense of integrity. Since I've started investing all of that time and energy in myself, my life has gotten much better. Only now that I've stepped back from it all has it dawned on me how demeaning trying to succeed in dating as a man. I understand that women are picky and understandably so, but in my experience they reject you before even knowing anything about you. And even if you keep waiting patiently until one of them notices you, they usually want to lock you into a marriage where you're just a useful idiot to them and they have control over you because they hold all the cards.

[@allenmobley8444]

Honestly the paradox of choice is so true!! I’m a guy who’s basically above average in every aspect. I’m 6 feet tall fairly athletic and make more than average money, 20+ years ago I would be considered a good catch. However now when I’m dating a woman it seems like she’s always looking for the “next level of guy” because of IG women think she’s missing out of something more.

[@Hypnotically_Caucasian]

Been out with over 15 women last year. None of them stayed or “I just want to be friends” BS. Loyalty is nonexistent, making relationships pointless.

[@terrafirmasean7615]

This video really spoke to me. Happily married for the past 5 years but I remember dating several women before. I don’t think I’m bad looking, I stay in shape, I’m a successful business owner, confident, well educated but I’m also 5’9”. Can’t tell you how many women (most of whom were 5’3” or 5’4”) who said they wanted someone just like me but 6’0” tall. I admit, out of curiosity, the wife and I recently looked at the dating site we were both once on. You know what? These same women are still on that site claiming in their profiles “would like to meet someone serious” or “just be real”. We had a good laugh over it. I’m truly thankful to have met the wonderful women I’m with.

[@semekiizuio]

Lucky! There is more hate and toxicity being told then positive stories being successful

[@sriharshacv7760]

I am 5'7'' and have it far worse than you. I am reasonably successful in career and yet found the whole game rigged. Unfortunately, the way the economy is, it is difficult to keep your job unless you are extremely competitive. In other words, very little time to volunteer together or hike together (also in most hike groups, the majority of the participants are young men or older women). (I have no complaints about hiking, just that it doesn't create opportunities in this regard). How much time would one spend in this courting game (especially when you are working hard to keep your job in an extremely fickle, employer friendly economy) when the rewards are measly, the opposite side seemingly has a million choices, and has 'high' 'standards'? The more important question is, given how the society has rigged itself against mating and refuses to acknowledge that it basically screwed over young men (over the course of time all men), how long would this survive in the current form?

[@tjones3393]

It's funny how it's always the short women that want tall guys. I used to get dirty looks from women before, but now with a 6'8" man around they can only give so much side eye before he throws them even more glare. Gotta love it 😂

[@seanb6478]

They say they want 1 thing but chase the other. If they'd admit to what they really wanted, things would be different.

[@prodigalpriest]

"I'm truly thankful to have met the women I am with"? Plural?🤨

[@offlinecyberpunk6507]

My parents told me and my brother not to risk anything for a relationship that is more likely to fail and cost the man, "Marriage is nearly dead in this day and age." is what my mother said. Even the daughters of a family that were friends of my parents who were all going to church ended up screwing up their lives, the oldest ones had clearly problematic personalities and habits. The second youngest put the parents into credit card debt and kicked out only to return a year later, pregnant from some random guy who was never seen again, in short, she became a single mom before she even turned 20. In the church in the big city parents regularly arrange engagements for their sons and daughters but all of them in the age range from 14 to 16, for me 31 years old and my brother 29 years old going there in hopes that god will find "the one" is a total waste of time for us.

[@sterbin5348]

I don’t think dating should be pressured on young men, I believe there is a stigma against men who aren’t dating. I think finding passion in life, learning good moral principals and working on self improvement should be valued more than whether or not “he has a girlfriend”.

[@chronobot2001]

My parents don't get along at all but they remain together out of necessity. I am much happier being alone.

[@ADifferentVibe]

As a single man in my 30s, I had friends who got married really young because they used behaviors that would be construed as harassment today (not taking no for an answer, etc) and they are proud of it because it got them the girl, and they look down on me because I didn't do those things when I was younger before the Me Too movement. They basically think being married automatically makes you more desirable and a higher level than anyone else. Like being poor and married is better than being rich and single. People are really out of reality.

[@mariusn6316]

Wait 5-10 years, then many of them are divorced again and then it is exciting where they look. Just the ones who fancy it fall the deepest

[@ADifferentVibe]

@@mariusn6316 the difference is I stopped giving a shit about them years ago when they stopped giving a shit about me and I started living the life I always wanted for myself without anybody I wanted to partner. Just making money and learning the skills I always wanted to learn for myself. Whenever I network with women, they are impressed with me. Until I meet one who's actually an adult where we find each other attractive for a long term relationship, I'll take being admired.

[@mariusn6316]

@@ADifferentVibe That is exactly the click you have to make. To be your own mental point of origin

[@davidvanwinkle5033]

I like how you said "had". They weren't your friends.

[@anythingchirping]

Yeah my dude be single, watch how things go for your friends. They may think that everything is perfect, eventually things will act out the way they do on stage.

[@terminallygray]

I can tell you this Sparky. The amount of dates or hook ups I have gotten from "traditional matchmakers" is absolutely, unmistakably ZERO. and..... I'm pretty sure that I'm not alone in that situation.

[@Nobleheart111]

1 in 10 chance for happy marriage. 9 out of 10 chance for a ruined life. Horrible bet.

[@TheTimeweaver]

That was my reaction. I'm wondering if the video poster would feel the same if he was the 9 in 10 with a ruined life.

[@libertydrive4388]

Great to see Antonio addressing what most men are talking about today--how chasing women in this environment is a sucker's bargain.

[@cubiczirconiabeard5366]

Dating was supposed to be you meet someone, go to a neutral place, and decide if you have commonality. Then after one or two of these, she invites you to her place for dinner. It wasn't supposed to be an infinite number of times guys are meal tickets like it is now.

[@franciscocarneiro]

"Shut up provider". The princesses claim from their throne. You need to be charitable in the tribe hunter man. - I can feel your pain Sir.

[@user-dw1ls3rp1l]

Yeah, it used to be pretty standard that the first 3 or 4 dates, things were casual. But, if you weren't intimate after about 2 months or so, you were never going to be...

[@RobinSentell]

@@user-dw1ls3rp1lNow men want immediate intimacy with no promise that it will be more.

[@user-dw1ls3rp1l]

Us old school guys know that if something is easy to get, it ain't worth having.

[@ghostdagger3588]

My two older sisters tried to play matchmaker for me with two different women. They said she was really pretty, kind and loves dogs etc. considering their other friends I met were really attractive I got excited, only to be severely disappointed as soon as they showed me a photo. I’m not beautiful myself but damn.. Since all women consider all women 10s I can never trust when a women says another women is attractive.

[@supreme-man]

that girl was prolly interested in you so your sisters wanted to help you out.

[@Landstalker1999]

@@supreme-man How is that helping him out when his sisters are matchmaking him with uggo's?

[@Alexandraadftxr7052]

@@Landstalker1999 if op was a woman who rejected a man based on looks, you would be up in arms about how op is in the wrong.

[@Alexandraadftxr7052]

@@kinetic-cybernetic and what's wrong with people who don't look conventionaly actractiv? And also there are pleanty of conventionaly actractiv women who have social anxaity. OP is in the wrong here, if the genders were reverse and OP was a woman who rejected a man based on soly on looks, you would be in a rent about how "women are salov", and "Women should just give a chance".

[@yummm8775]

LOL! Never trust a woman's point of view when describing her friends. NEVER!

[@slimanity35]

As a young man I do approve that everything you said in the video was true but now that I stopped trying Im happier than ever it feels like Im free and happy and I’ll make sure I’ll spend the rest of my 20s like this,I still make space for a relationship if one ever happens to occur but if not dying single doesn’t seem so bad after all.

[@drex1235]

In my 20's and taking a time out on dating. I blame woke culture. Going on a date, hearing about social justice issues and the patriarchy, then being expected to pay for everything gets confusing.

[@jokernabastard2828]

Agreed. God forbid if you stand up for yourself and disagree with them, then they will throw the mysogyny word around.

[@feartheghus]

leave california for a good state like florida and date there.

[@drex1235]

@@feartheghus They're everywhere! Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of great ladies out there. All this wokeness seems to come up more than I ever noticed.

[@jasons6021]

Anyone with their social justice causes in their bio is an automatic no from me. While I may agree with the cause I know the type of women these people are and I know they'll just drive me mentally nuts.

[@goldenboymp5200]

Ha! True!🤣

[@InitialDL84]

I gave up on dating about a year ago, and left on a good note at that. It just feels like a complete waste of time, and 9 times out of 10 I only want one thing anyway. Meeting up with women who make you take them on 3-4 dates but doesn't make the other guy work for it is not the business for me. Rather just focus on myself and build my net worth.

[@Sagefrakrobatik]

imagine how infuriating it would be if you took a girl on a bunch of dates only to find out, the same girl gave a mutual acquittance head the same day the met. I'd be so livid

[@mrbeltr5833]

I was married for 2 years 4 years total with my ex. At the year and a half she out of the blue asked for an open marriage. One like will smith I later found out she was deep into the red table talk. I later found out she was constantly cheating. Looking back yeah i gained a few pounds and even lost a bit of ambition. Looking back we were both in the wrong but at the end of the day I didn’t cheat and I didn’t ask for an open marriage. I will learn from my mistakes. I will never let my guard down on ambition and health.

[@theresaarnold8911]

From a woman’s perspective, I’ve always been uncomfortable with men who put so much emphasis on a first date and making it something that could be expensive. Find a cheap or free activity for the first meeting that could be fun. Do something where you can get to know her and let her get to know you. Don’t invest in something expensive unless it’s a special occasion. Be a gentleman and treat her well. If that doesn’t impress her, she’s not worth your time. When I would meet a new guy (I’m not single), I always enjoyed the dates where I felt like he had no agenda other than just getting to know me.

[@devilsadvocacy]

Thank you for bringing a clear-eyed perspective to the discussion. With all the performative theater in spaces like this, your take is a breath of fresh air

[@zvxcvxcz]

Thank you for the sane comment. I've always been partial to coffee/tea, or board games, something like that. Movie dates always seemed super dumb to me because you would spend all the time unable to talk. Dinner dates are probably fine if they're a bit informal, but fancy restaurants are often... 1) more expensive 2) not as tasty 3) give less food 4) are super stuffy. Bars and clubs also always seemed super dumb to me (can't hear a word they're saying, pretty sure those are places just for people that find each other hot to give each other passes on every disrespectful thing imaginable... we all know they just saunter over and start grinding without asking anything). The later part of school dances back in the day were the better parts for me, music was a bit quieter so you could actually ask someone to dance, and you could get away without any real moves :P. The Robot and the Macarena were never my thing.

[@seanb6478]

Agreed, this is why women like Theresa aren't single.

[@divebomb99]

Insightful input, but unfortunately in the longer run it won't matter. Nothing is ever good enough for most women. Sure we can get through the first date with your advice but in the back of their minds so many of them want to "keep their options open". *Perpetually*. All the while they are scanning and scanning for red flags, perceived or real. It's pathetic.

[@markcampbell1795]

@@devilsadvocacy its been 3 months, did it work, have ya dated her yet, or got her number, you friends in social media? Just curious!

[@gordonbrandt9739]

I told my oldest when she got married "if you are marrying, for love your doomed. Marriage is a business agreement & you have treat it as such it will be OK. You'll fall in & out of love on a regular basis. Just be committed for the long term & you'll survive as a couple." Also, I've lived my belief & been married 45 years. Up or down we have gotten through whatever the issue was & moved on.

[@funeo618]

Thanks for watching and commenting ❤️ you have been randomly selected from comments as winners of today's giveaway hit me up via the digit's above to claim your prize 🎁..

[@evocati6523]

That sounds awful actually

[@vettemuziekjes]

How romantic

[@vettemuziekjes]

yea, specially if the business end involves grabbing half in a divorce. @@evocati6523

[@Yarmox]

This new year I fully accepted that I dont have to date or try and talk to women in that sense. For years I carried this weight that I ‘have’ to talk to women to be considered normal or successful in the future. Ofcourse women never reciprocated, not for me not for most of my friends. Theres no point at all and since I made this decision I have actually felt a great relief.

[@trophy8174]

I stopped dating because out of fear of eventually getting married and then a divorce happening. There goes half of my livelihood!

[@BB-km5nv]

I married a woman for a few days only, she accused me of having epilepsy because I was nice to her... her father threatened me and I lost twenty percent to her...Women love strong men meaning they must commit a crime

[@vettemuziekjes]

try marry and divorce a rich woman, you get nothing. A rich man on the other hand..

[@Levi-gh1sq]

Not that I haven't stopped dating, I've just stopped trying to get one until i think I could actually handle dating. Each time someone brings up dating I always think about how it will make my schedule much more cramped and possibly increase stress.

[@JG-ni2yi]

Same boat man. I stopped 4 years ago now and still just don’t feel like it would fit my schedule to have a girlfriend. Work, lifting, hanging with close friends consumes all my time. It’s hard to see how a relationship can fit

[@smcdoug11]

Thank you for your work and support for elevating male culture

[@Fillipe.356]

Female superego is a major factor indeed. Honestly we're not looking for supermodels really, but mid women rarely know they’re mid so they haven’t worked on compensating for it. They're not hot AND are very boring. Can’t win on a situation like that! It's realistically impossible to live with someone so alienated by social media and deranged by reality - remember, we're talking about grown people - so I'm better off alone.

[@drex1235]

THIS!

[@KiraTheGod666]

Sadly, men are also to blame on this. all those guys who just accept it and settle for someone they dont even love or arent even really attracted to just for the sake of been in a relationship or to have sex. because most men havent learn to love themself first and to not settle for less then they deserve.

[@YouAreStillNotablaze]

Sounds like the same thing that can be said about men, it just goes both ways. How do you know you're not also the one with "mid" looks and personality

[@Willie_Wahzoo]

Yep. There's nothing like trying to converse with a totally uninteresting person who thinks she's a god and has no idea how to have a conversation because she thinks it's YOUR JOB to keep her entertained. They have nothing but selfishness to offer. They're truly rotten and worthless.

[@mikochild2]

Women go through that all the time. The boring date with the ego who only wants to hear himself talk is so common that it's part of pop culture.

[@Camopar87]

Ive been single for years and keeping it that way. Have been most of my life. Its not worth the bs and I have nothing to gain

[@BrianDefferding]

I was with someone for 4 years and married that same person for another 4 years. By the fourth year of our marriage, she said that she wasn't attracted to me anymore and got a job that had her constantly away at home. The fact of the matter is, you can do all of the things that you think is right, and spend years thinking you are a good partner, it doesn't matter. They may still change their mind.

[@69Muscle]

Social Media and dating apps have absolutely ruined dating. To be fair, it goes both ways, but in my opinion and experiences in the past few years, most woman, who are a 6 or 7, seek nothing less than a 9 or 10 in a man who has lots of money. They play the field incessantly and seek instant validation. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Its a fucking joke now.

[@junipervip681]

Yes, it's the same for women: men who are a 6 or a 7 seek nothing less than a woman who is a 9 or 10 and with money. Perhaps it's time for both men and women who rate a 6 or less to just accept that they simply do not rate high enough to be married and should just accept being single.

[@karlstrauss2330]

I consider myself a 7/10. I’m over 6 feet tall, I served in the military and am working towards getting a college degree. The ex-con with tattoos who drives a motorcycle or Chad the Corporate Lawyer who makes six figures wins with women over me every time.

[@junipervip681]

@@karlstrauss2330 Exactly. And the 7/10 woman with an education and career will lose out to the woman with more money, fishnet stockings and more allure. No matter what she does, there will always be someone better who will ultimately attract her man over her.

[@JAKEBrakeModel94]

@@junipervip681 this is not true. Men and women don’t look for the same things. Men aren’t looking for a woman with money.

[@junipervip681]

@@JAKEBrakeModel94 Haha, best reply so far! Women have degrees and make a good income. Men like their toys and want money to purchase them. There will always be someone (male or female) with better looks and more money. That is why most women find it more financially and emotionally secure to remain single.

[@michaelcuomo1352]

I pretty much gave up on dating since it was costing me money. After not dating for 3 years I was able to get a new car for the first time ever and got live in the decent 2 floor apartment

[@reeyadali8516]

No one to command expectations from you or demand time/ money or tell you you’re not making them happy even tho you’re breaking your pockets to give them food and take ‘em home … man I coulda worked on myself instead you gotta feed someone else’s ego

[@livliv2384]

Because I don't want to deal with the drama.

[@fe3613]

Women: destroys dating Women: "How could men do this?"

[@raydafuq3570]

I don't date, I don't want to marry ever, I don't want kids and I'm not even slightly focused on getting a girlfriend. After some years of being single you realize that there is basically nothing women can provide you with what you can't get elsewhere way cheaper. Even sex.

[@MoulayAbdsamadBelghiti]

Strongly agree even though it should not be that way... We are collectively screwing it up frankly... From where/how will come the next generations? We don't live just for ourselves otherwise we would not be here for the most part. PS: no hard feelings here, just real talk.

[@arpitpatel5312]

@@MoulayAbdsamadBelghiti imo, if the collective can not design a system where the individual benefits just as much as the collective, then why should the individual adhere to the collective's system? The individual will do things that will benefit itself over the collective. So, why should someone care about the future generations if it means sacrificing one's sanity and happiness?

[@MoulayAbdsamadBelghiti]

@@arpitpatel5312 agreed with the individual/collective balance; Further this is all horizontal; Without a “vertical” dimension, ie God and an afterlife with a reward system, that is not sustainable.

[@pragyankakati3092]

Finally a wise person 🙌

[@tomsmith6513]

Yeah if the sex isn't worth it, masturbation can be just as good as sex with a real person.

[@walkingstick6655]

You nailed it on every point. I stopped dating 10 years ago, with the rise of online dating. I'm sort of a Sigma male, anyhow, so I'm happy with my own company and don't really need anyone (woman or man). So, I do my own thing, travel on my own, etc. I have contentment.

[@spirituscaeruleum4563]

True happiness is finding it in yourself, not in finding it from one another.

[@abryant3000]

As a woman in her 30's, this was very, VERY insightful! I didn't even realize how guilty I was of following the crowd. Thank you for this - good for me to reflect!

[@articsebas]

Thanks for that self-reflection! It is well-appreciated. Do you think some women are realising about that?

[@abryant3000]

@@articsebas recognition of wrongdoing is one thing, taking action towards a better path is another. I do think more and more women are coming to the realization of just how problematic our behavior can be, but I’ll be honest… There aren’t too many examples of people doing it right in my sphere of influence. I say that not to say I’m not encouraged, but I get why so many people choose to stay the way they are. It’s much easier.

[@Squish_that_cat]

​@@abryant3000 In my native language a gun is considered to be a female I often joke about how my I'm married to my gun 😂😂

[@rvh1702]

@Abryant3000: yeah sure, you NEVER EVER had a single clue that acting 'hard to get', ghosting, etc, would be bad traits in (online) dating. Tell that to your cat

[@forman208]

You needed a video to show you how to behave like a decent person? Big yikes.

[@honzadousek5304]

My biggest problem is people not giving themselves a chance, they keep hoping for something better and better and better and being unnecessarily rude to each other. For example, why does a girl text me just to tell me I'm ugly? It doesn't make sense. It's not like I'm gonna be hurt by something like that, because I don't feel ugly. Or just say hi and stop conversation. I just wonder why?

[@britneybij3997]

Bruh, how she got your number??? She woke up and chose violence 🤣🤣🤣

[@honzadousek5304]

​@@britneybij3997 It was message via dating app. Who knows why she did something like that.

[@willieg.518]

That girl that called you ugly is projecting her own insecurities onto you and likely other men as well. She probably views herself as ugly, but what makes her ugly is the projection.

[@Daan_Knobbout]

Men are thirsty, and most cases of non consensual marriage and sex come from the male side. Women are wanted, men just want to stick it in someone, preferably attractive. Sex is love, not lust. This leads to bad standards only rising, Women see men as endless supply of this thirst, they show some skin at 20-25 not being obese and any thirsty men come running. Then later on, interest falls, yet they still expect the same lust, which has now turned into wanting to be loved for who they are? Which can only come from someone truly thirsty.

[@handsomeX]

​@IVAN DRAGO DENEN KRAL People that abuse(whether mentally or physically)usually has had that done to them. And their level of insecurity is through the freaking roof. This is why so many of them exhibit extreme narcisim. Narcisim is an extreme state of insecurity.

[@ViperBOSS74]

MeToo, feminism and hypergamy destroyed dating for men. Stay single, find your purpose and enjoy PEACE. YOUR WELCOME GENTS!

[@disruptor109]

Exercise that passport!

[@ViperBOSS74]

@@disruptor109 EXACTLY!!!!

[@lavellelee5734]

@@disruptor109 exercise 🤣

[@jayc342009]

If your own women despise you why is it wrong to find a good woman abroad?

[@ronnie5329]

@@jayc342009 It depends why they "despise" you, it sounds like your own head talking there and not neccesarily the truth. If you are stable, with average income, average to below average looking, it makes total sense to look for women abroad, no matter race or social status Now if you have mental health issues, or is too fat, you need to focus on that before going abroad. Otherwise you might attract the wrong woman in those countries

[@alexsantiago3181]

God, imma cry. I just went through a break-up because I "wasn't treating her good enough". We had been dating for over 2 years, and I was under the impression that we were fine. I didn't know she had fallen out of love with me. Clearly she thought she could do better. Even though I tried to be caring, fun and respectful and I was nothing but loyal.

[@toomanymodz]

A manager once said to me "being married is the hardest thing you will ever do".

[@joesmith9216]

it is, FOR MEN.

[@BlueJayWaters]

I'm going through a temporary separation due to marital issues for the next 4 months. I am the youngest and first to get married in my friend group. When I hear from my friends how hard dating is and how they're so envious of me always having someone to go home to, it makes me pretty nervous to have to actually consider dating again. And that's with a divorce by 30 added on top of that. The only upside is that my confidence has only grown stronger and I realize my life goals can exist without another person being involved. I still think woman are kind-of like teens when they see a man ignore them or quite literally not simp for them, they are way more attracted to a man. And I've had plenty of female co-workers over the last few years prove that to me. Either way, I hope I can fix my marriage one way or the other, but I do not envy men when it comes to dating in 2022.

[@mikehoncho4118]

Check out the married red pill subreddit

[@llaneloc]

Flawless explanation Flawless thesis Flawless antithesis Flawless synthesis Thank you Nobody can be this perfect

[@funeo618]

Thanks for watching and commenting ❤️ you have been randomly selected from comments as winners of today's giveaway hit me up via the digit's above to claim your prize 🎁..

[@Camopar87]

I've been single for years and keeping it that way. Tired of being lied to, cheated on, used and ghosted. I have nothing to gain from it. Women these days suck. All they want to do is take what they want from you then leave. Onlyfans has ruined a lot of women. Now they all think men should have to pay to do anything with them

[@markusParkus233]

half wrong

[@neogivxapwntcpaa]

@@markusParkus233 what half is right may i ask?

[@GottiLx]

I've stopped dating, Steve Harvey is a prime example not to get married,it's a come up for women

[@123pb]

Steve had to pay more than her felon drug dealer ex husband

[@hasher22]

We're in a throwaway culture........ dating sites/apps have made it 1000000x worse.

[@enhancedutility266]

It's financial and economic today's men have to work 5-10× as hard for just a tenth of what their father and grandpa got throughout the decades and it doesn't help that a good portion of men didn't get proper guidance and or being mislead by various actors on the internet and social media including social attitudes of today.

[@BrokensoulRider]

Single parenting definitely is known to have had an impact, both on men and women.

[@enhancedutility266]

@@BrokensoulRider yes about 1/4 or 1/2 of kids are raised by single parent household

[@BrokensoulRider]

@@enhancedutility266 Trust me I know. I was raised by a single mother. I can safely say I'd have more 'daddy issues' if I didn't have 4 good years with a step father during the formative time.

[@enhancedutility266]

@@BrokensoulRider that's good

[@ak5659]

Yeah, salaries for most professions have not kept up with cost of living. For the lifestyle my grandfather had working 40 hours per week, my dad had to work 50 and I have to work 60. I'm amazed this doesn't show up more often in these kinds of vids.

[@MrWarlockFTW]

My last date was 2016 I'm 37 and doing fine

[@Aeternum_Gaming]

divorce court cost me my house, car, children, child support, alimony, friends, and dignity as a man. i will never sign a contract again that incentivizes the other participant to cheat on me and break said contract ever again. No-fault divorce has destroyed marriage

[@fastingman4726]

Damn man, sorry about your luck. How long were you married?

[@ramosa999]

"Let's address the elephant in the room..." When you go to meet your online date - she will be the elephant in the room.

[@Arische234]

That is hysterical

[@cancelled_user]

LOL

[@jlcarter04]

Lmao!!

[@AshesandCoffee]

you arent getting dates

[@alexanderivkin7086]

Most western women can easily compete with elephants. Or whales.

[@joshuasmith1877]

Reminds me a lot of the book Bowling Alone, which discusses the decline of American community. I think dating just goes along with it. We're more separated and people don't know each other as well. This isn't a problem with women, I think it's a community problem.

[@MrBooYa-yd5er]

Women have the kids, if they go down we all go down.

[@YouAreStillNotablaze]

@@MrBooYa-yd5er Good to hear someone acknowledge that importance.

[@shin-ishikiri-no]

It's a problem with women.

[@jonyD143]

This is an excellent point because I'm also thinking that community is a sister or a cause of social ostracization (a subset effect from having a community). And I'm drawing the inference of how being a widow or a slut was shamed back in the day and in addition to the females innate nature of avoiding on being looked at as slutty. Divorce rates were much lower probably due to that effect as well as women having less economic authority to provide for themselves. In comparison to today, we have social, mental and governmental safety nets that give a woman less incentive to be loyal to their man.

[@randyquaid3381]

It's both

[@joek9542]

A neighbor I grew up next to was like grandparents too me. Years after the husband dies the widow told me they got married by a dare. At the end of high school friends said hes never going to get married. He said the wedding is going to be this weekend. The bride to be had no idea. They were not even friends. Just people passing by each other. The only church that would marry them thought a kid was on the way. The baby was born 5 ish years later. Married 50 some years until he died.

[@PeterParker-ff7ub]

I dont know how people do it. I am starting to exercise, eat healthy, drink more water, got a haircut, clean my face every afternoon and morning, take a vitamin everyday, have a job, cant change height or looks.

[@livliv2384]

Great!

[@RaceTheAce77]

Honestly sometimes women on these apps don't even show up. They will string you along for a week or 2. Then cancel 30 min before the first date. Not worth my time

[@RealMenRealStyle]

Sorry to hear that you have that experience.

[@brandonbarnville9745]

That’s why you set up a date within the week immediately after speaking to them preferably on the phone or FaceTime. Also plan your dates around what you want to or was already planning on doing so you won’t be dependent on needing someone for fun if she doesn’t show up because you were going to do said activity anyways. If she texts or calls and makes a legit or fake excuse for not showing up, make it clear that she owes you in some way whether it is paying for tip, food, drinks etc… Other than that move on and try again

[@logicwins3492]

@Brandon Barnville And therein lies the problem. You stated that men should "let women know they owe you" for flaking on a date. Why do I have to "let someone know" they need to be a decent human being with morals? A woman who flakes on a date and doesn't innately believe they owe you a date at their expense at some point in the future is 🗑 You make it seem like men should simply accept that women (in general) are morally incompetent.

[@devinjinadasa6334]

It feels unbelievably good to be heard. Thank you Antonio!

[@RealMenRealStyle]

You're welcome.

[@AspieGamer1986]

Marriage has failed from the start. Love is life's biggest lie.

[@Ray-fk2yb]

Nobody deserves to be in a toxic relationship. It's better to be single and happy than be miserable in a relationship with someone who doesn't care about you. My advice to single men is to take care of your physical and mental health and treat yourself. If you're going to be single, make the most of it, and enjoy your life. Buy some nice clothes, go travelling, eat that meal you've always wanted to eat at that fancy restaurant, and above all do what makes you happy.

[@Hschlick84]

Besides sex, what do men get out of relationships that's worth the headaches and pain?

[@tianyanghan4186]

and the pleasure only lasts for 5 seconds.

[@loghomemaintenance]

The sex is not worth it

[@JesusChrist5000]

Men get married for sex gratification only. Whereas women get married because they are looking for a repairman, a therapist, and money.

[@rossmcgarry8055]

Absolutely f'en NOTHING. I'm 72, divorced after 36 years of marriage and I still don't know why I got the flick. I was always in employment; no addictions whatsoever; never cheated (or even flirted) while we were married; always paid the household bills and mortgage; and so on. To all of you young guys out there: Please, please, please do not ever marry these women or even live with them. Once you share a house through marriage or a simple partnership, you will pay and pay and pay them when you break up. And yes! THEY will break up with you. Over 80% of relationship break-ups are initiated by the woman. 80%. Remember that fellas.

[@truongcahanh8915]

I don't think it's true that there is nothing gained from marriage. Even ones that ended badly had to have some meaning, some period of time where both were happy. Im sorry that it ended with so much heartbreak for you, but there is usually more than one reason a couple seperate. It seems that you still lack a more nuanced perspective and putting all the blame on your partner on the grounds that you supposedly checked all the boxes (which although more applaudable is far from complete)

[@jakemckee14]

Only been in one relationship and that was enough for me

[@PORTMIAMIMIKE]

🤦🏾‍♂️

[@RealMenRealStyle]

[@jakemckee14]

Not that I'm put off by women and dating. I Just find more value in using that time and effort on myself

[@olemundoaguilar1224]

Smart

[@ClayWeblogistics]

6:34 Computer dating services still exist. Now they are deliberately not matching. The companies found you make more money by not matching! In online dating only some men get "all the fruits" the rest get nothing or broken women who are on their way to destroying another guys life. The guys that never marry are the lucky ones.

[@user-su5uf5yv1w]

Agreed.

[@nicksoehren4812]

I matched two of my friends together at my wedding last year. I never realized how much they had in common until they were both in the same room. So when my female friend showed interest in him, I told her he was single and they’ve been together now for a little over a year and they just moved together.

[@vettemuziekjes]

wow, a whole year already.... smh