Why Movie Cops Are Terrible At Their Jobs - After Hours

[@kaizenkltr]

“It’s not autistic.... it’s I KISSED A GIRL...and I liked it.” “But you can understand the confusion” I miss this brilliant show

[@darlalathan6143]

I'm autistic and I kiss a lot of girls, lol!

[@pyroandrew6752]

Yeah

[@pallyboy6005]

@@darlalathan6143 And I kiss lots of autistic girls!

[@raypreseau2047]

Ikr. Cracked is back, but not like it was. The still do honest adds with roger horton though. Those are greatness.

[@vinnregi4882]

From now on, if i ever come across that song, i'll be singing "Autistic girl, i liked it..." subtly, to see if any of my friends catches it xD

[@RelativelyBest]

That whole "Dan has been horribly murdered" thing makes me wish I had friends who'd all seamlessly go along with an improvised bit.

[@kattastic9999]

I love how Dan's murder started as just the hypothetical to get the conversation going and it just kept getting more and more specific. He was dismembered, possibly multiple limbs but at the very least he was decapitated. It's believed to be the work of a serial killer, and his headless body was found in a dumpster.

[@GoatPopsicle]

I like coming back and rewatching these older episodes. This show is easily re-watchable.

[@tobocopj3164]

Lets sign a piece of paper to get them back😄(yes I forgot how to spell that word)

[@Golden_Rabbit]

Toby Engel petition?

[@tobocopj3164]

@@Golden_Rabbit yes

[@Siktopath]

Super easy, barely an inconvenience.

[@tobocopj3164]

@@Siktopath buddy this is not a pitch meeting

[@Crazy56U]

I think this is a rare instance of a video managing to both age _poorly_ and _perfectly_ at the same time.

[@cliftonsargent1572]

Lol

[@Dakarai_Knight]

I mean things like this have been going on for awhile so....

[@HopeYourDoingOkay]

@@Dakarai_Knight True but it was only brought to public attention (or it at least stopped being ignored\accepted as much) somewhat recently. I'll be honest, living in England where they don't have guns, the murder they commit was rarely on my mind before, just the rare occasions when it was brought up in the news. Don't get me wrong there's still institutional biggotry that's been grandfathered into the whole system they just don't tend kill people on the streets.

[@drvollen]

i think it's a white people thing

[@nkirukaj2384]

I personally think it aged perfectly

[@Justmyhandle]

I guess they didn't watch Hot Fuzz, the only other movie I can think of with an objectively good, successful police force that improves in quality from an already competent level without killing one criminal. Here is my evidence, feedback is welcome: 1. Simon Pegg's character Nicholas Angel is diligent, hard working, loyal to a fault, by the book and trained for years to be as effective as possible upholding the law within legal boundaries. While intense and arguably over-eager in response time and methods, he ALWAYS gets the job done without collateral damage to lives and little damage to property. Whenever something doesn't feel up to regulations or enough isn't being done, he is the first to speak against it and demand respect for law and order. 2. Before being promoted to Sargeant, Angel had already amassed a record arrest average in the Metropolitan police, literally the poster boy most fantasize about. That's why they sent him to Sanford, he was making the rest "look bad". In reality, such an individual would increase local trust in the police and inspire others to follow his example. Granted, he's not the best at teamwork but learns those values later. Even before that, he contributed greatly to stopping a drug ring, for which he received a medal. 3. He never disobeys his superiors, although he does disagree with them at points, and never endangers innocents. Even when taking it upon himself to bring down the corruption in the final act, he does so because he knows with certainty that everyone present (apart from the few judges who show up in one scene and are never shown getting hurt) is in on the conspiracy. He knows that the Metropolitan police wouldn't believe him and that the Neighborhood Watch would continue their crimes until they were stopped. Any officer who cared about human life, the very thing the law exists to protect, would have done the same for the greater good. And let's not pretend like laws have never been temporarily revoked or amended in real life under deserving circumstances. 4. While Hot Fuzz does fit the "buddy cop" genre, Simon Pegg and Nick Frost never go renegade to the point where they cause harm to fellow officers or unnecessarily break laws. Them taking action was necessary to stop the corruption before more people died, which they definitely would have otherwise. Not only do the two expose the truth to the previously fooled Sanford police and convince them to help, they do so as a well managed team following operative protocols and training. 5. Most importantly, Simon Pegg, Nick Frost and company are shown DOING THEIR PAPERWORK for every criminal they apprehend. Police who reviewed the film commented themselves that this is almost never depicted and that they appreciated the attention to detail. Overall, the police in Hot Fuzz are ideal and effective far more so than in most movies or even real life.

[@tyrant-den884]

My theory is that they only wanted modern USA cops. Hence they didn't mention Robocop.

[@jimmysnickles9642]

They said in the video you had to hire the whole department not just one guy

[@laurenbastin8849]

Yeah the main issue with that is that you’d have to live in Sanford specifically. all the other cops are between normal and weird suburban murder cult.

[@thesurvivorssanctuary6561]

Most of the police in the movie are somewhat competent, if a bit clueless. They're basically your regular british cops, and by God that would be an improvement here!

[@LordMoonshadowGaGa]

@Pedro They weren’t, actually. Remember they were being intentionally misled by their chief because he was the mastermind. When they all sided with Angel to assault the green grocer, they were an absolute unit.

[@emmathestonedspider8676]

The difference between Police Academy and real world cops is that in Police Academy there's not that big of a power dynamic and the cops were intergrated into the community.

[@JediDoc]

Ok guys, i think i found the best police ever depicted in movies: Vegan Police from Scott Pilgrim 16 Seconds reaction time, they know exactly when you committed a chrime and why.

[@Zcumgod]

Milk and eggs Bitch.

[@hooj4808]

Only problem is that the only way they'd solve a murder is if a vegan was the killer then ate the body.

[@MrChocobar]

I think you have to call them. There's multiple comments about the ex boyfriend having eaten Gelato and I think chicken parmesean at one point

[@trentrubenacker9718]

Well, they're high level vegans. I'm sure mental superpowers are involved.

[@baldman7738]

@@MrChocobar no they come because it's Todd's third offense

[@charleschoate6986]

Sitting in their convertibles, lickin jelly out of each other's mouths. This show was amazing.

[@professionalkilljoy4028]

Watching this in 2020 and Katies being ACAB already is honestly inspiring

[@QuantumRipple]

Professional Killjoy I’m pretty sure they’re all ACAB

[@The1stImmortal]

Bear in mind the conclusion is that (spoilers) the best movie cops are actually closest to the real world cops, and so are ok.

[@williamnguyen8663]

The1stImmortal no, the best movie cops was police academy the movie where the people essentially police themselves.its pretty much just “regular cops suck at their jobs and these civilians fresh out of the academy do better jobs”

[@levhdv2117]

Everybody has been acab foreever

[@The1stImmortal]

@@williamnguyen8663 they started down that path then trailed off when they realized that cops are always recruited from all interested civilians. Cops are normal people.

[@njuta]

I'm not sure, but I think Katie's delivery of the the 'sitting in convertibles licking jelly out of each others mouths' is one of the funniest moments of all After Hours.

[@iambicpentakill971]

She really sells that it's a stereotype that everyone knows

[@Danmarinja]

I love how After Hours is the only show that doesn't rely on clickbait in the title

[@zstick]

Top 7 weird tricks you won't believe that a housewife invented to make $497.36 every day off of the incompetence of movie police forces.

[@Danmarinja]

Top 10 mind blowing mind blows that will blow your mind! Number 3 is why mind blowing doctors HATE him with one simple mind blowing trick that will blow your mind!

[@tank_0r]

Danmarinja 8 Weird life hacks used by movie cops who suck at their jobs! Number 6 will make you cry!

[@cinammonstyx7622]

Danmarinja Eh, they still kind of do.

[@Adam-cs2qm]

Not as bad as their other shows they make, but they still usually use adverbs like "secretly" and "terrible" in their titles to give it that extra umpf.

[@Qawsx56]

surprised Hot Fuzz wasn't mentioned.

[@Devilyaki]

qawsx56 ya but that would fall under hoping to get the best for the case.

[@Qawsx56]

Devilyaki Exactly, the movie's theme is practically that. It's just an really good example.

[@Torchwood1077]

qawsx56 Was thinking that the whole time I was watching as well.

[@AlexanderGailson]

qawsx56 Not to mention that the police department that he came from in the beginning of the movie just outright sent away the ONE cop that does a good job because he's making them all look back. They literally tell you that they are so concomitant that they find good cops a threat to the status quo!

[@ezralogan]

qawsx56 That is odd. Hot Fuzz is already an intentional collection of cop movie tropes though. Maybe citing it would be a little to on the nose? It is an excellent flick.

[@madswilkins1752]

Watching this in 2020 hit different

[@BigSweets-wm4kw]

Fuckin a bruh

[@WitchHunter1991]

@@BigSweets-wm4kw why would you fuck a bruh?

[@jameswood3936]

Omg right 😬😮

[@bazgriffith8117]

My thoughts exactly

[@Dakarai_Knight]

@@WitchHunter1991 i mean gays exist but idk if that's what they meant

[@PaperbackWizard]

"They forget to check if there's a bomb sewn inside one of the inmates." I mean...is that on the checklist? Frisk for weapons, take their belts away, *maybe* a cavity search, and check to see if their bellies are full of TNT?

[@vincentmuyo]

The guy should've been taken to get a medical check-up, though?

[@Nevertoleave]

If it was buried in the intestines or under the ribs, sure, easy to miss, but it’s a rectangle just under the skin. They should have felt a cell phone sized rectangle on his chest if they frisked him as well as you should when dealing with the joker

[@darlalathan6143]

Yeah, Joker thinks out-of-the-box for a criminal. That's supervillains for you! Good thing he didn't smuggle dope in Terminators!

[@LordMoonshadowGaGa]

If you’re frisking them, wouldn’t you feel the bulge of the phone through his skin?

[@PaperbackWizard]

@@LordMoonshadowGaGa I wouldn't think a pat down would be *that* thorough. They'd be looking for weapons he's carrying, not tumors in his chest.

[@Mallory-Malkovich]

almost a decade later and I still miss this show.

[@GothamClive]

There is one obvious and correct answer. LAST ACTION HERO! Every single cop in that precinct is part of a buddy cop duo, which obviously means that every single case gets solved. Bonus advantage of that precinct is the money saving. It's very likely that every cop in that movie gets killed a week before retirement, which means that there are no retirement costs.

[@thejohnykilroy]

lol

[@hydrogenone4926]

Artists Aliens heck the cartoon cat is apparently one of their best Cops.

[@GothamClive]

Michael Schuster Of course, you can't kill cartoon cats.

[@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick]

Artists Aliens Or rabbits.

[@Christopher_Gibbons]

Police Academy. They always win, there are never any casualties, and they are entertaining while they work.

[@Trapashow]

Also, Zed becomes one of them. They actively incorporate parts of the community, to become better

[@RugbyGuide]

@@Trapashow Great point! He used to be a real JERK! ... but now he's a people guy.

[@PaperbackWizard]

I can't tell if this video has "aged well" or not.

[@MrHatman26]

Ignoring the obvious thing you're hinting about, I'd say it has aged quite alright. Most of After Hours has. You can still watch them and they don't feel outdated. (If we stop ignoring what you're saying, then I have no idea about this video)

[@Norsilca]

I think it's actually amazingly on point for this very moment in history. By 6:14 they identify how the media teaches Americans that cops are supposed to be aggressive renegades whose rule-breaking is always justified.

[@JhericFury]

Brooklyn 99, they're just slightly better than standard cops who are cool guys.

[@DragonTrainer201]

And even if you get the two really bad detectives, there's still a chance one of the better ones will help out.

[@Crocogator]

also you get terry crews

[@leopayne410]

JhericFury they take down figgis who has moles in like the CIA

[@romank6131]

JhericFury this.

[@Lucy-ng7cw]

movies

[@geoffreypeterson8903]

RIP Daniel, though your brutal murder was inevitable, considering all the fondly remembered movies you've ruined.

[@fitzbrekker9001]

So... Cracked predicted defund the police? This sketch has aged like a fine wine omg

[@trulle132]

Felt the same... It's awesome.

[@bluestrife28]

Totally.

[@TimmyT1234]

The whole show has aged like that... Weirdly poignant in the Corona Age

[@wesmesser4006]

sad part is this isn't a new cause it's just finally hit a boiling point....I really hope good and lasting change happens and soon. i'm sickened by all the pointless death. and pain.

[@dskdev]

I might be uneducated but doesn’t defunding the police = less trained police? But I say demilitarization of the police is a pretty noble cause. SWAT Teams can burst into your home with assault rifles and shit with no warrant

[@reedkellner6447]

Lol at Daniel's reactions every time someone mentions his murder.

[@JaymeDeeRAV]

"When you heard the sirens did you notice were there lights on, or was he just opening his mouth?" "I forgot to check completely" "That's the first thing I check!" 2019 and I still can't even 😂😂😂

[@dragoredrox7493]

The empathy of Daniel tho and his opening response "Oooohohobo I don't like this" perfect. It went from unnecessary and surprising to a surmised "brutal" on to a simple "justified" Seriously- im weak

[@ZephWraen]

They offed Dan?! But I love Dan.... WE MUST AVENGE HIM!

[@TickedOffPriest]

James Sinn I'll get Stark, you get the big guy.

[@agentwashingtub9167]

James Sinn We could kill him and frame the others, then make a skin suite out of his body.

[@posiky90]

AgentWashingtub i'm in

[@ManaMastery]

AgentWashingtub This

[@stevenyanis9051]

Mike said it was a "hideous but deserved dismemberment..." So if it's deserved, then should we not just let bygones be bygones? I mean I love Dan...but I pose the question to you; if he were to, say...hmmm STOP making Obsessive Pop Culture Disorder perhaps...doesn't he deserve to be dismembered, and said parties to the crime relinquished of all wrong doings? I just wanna add in the fact that he leaves a tip for the toast he wasn't charged for. An upstanding citizen to say the least, but a casualty of war nevertheless...unless he punches out another OPCD...and SOON!

[@Captain-Jinn]

What about The Fugitive? Everyone in that movie openly admits the only reason they don't catch Kimble is because he's a freaking genius. And granted they're chasing the wrong guy the whole time, there was no evidence for the one-armed man. So unless the criminals leave absolutely no evidence behind, these guys are gonna be on top, with Tommy Lee Jones leading the way. And I mean, the Janitor in uniform is just too great to pass up. Also, when did Dan get his hair back?

[@itsthepaz6623]

FINALLY! After hours is why I subscribed to Cracked. We need more!

[@Drace90]

Good movie, Katie. Police Academy got you the point. Daniel: 18 Soren: 13 Katie: 15 Michael: 18

[@tinkrtailr]

what about the cops from the first Avengers movie? They've got a great response time, and actually get shit done. I mean, they actually listen to Cap and work with the Avengers instead of getting in their way.

[@bookwermofthefandoms]

Madi Zehring yeah, the only good ones from a superhero movie I've ever seen

[@alexanderelderhorst2107]

No wonder the cities get repaired so quickly and easily

[@PaperbackWizard]

Yeah, but they needed Cap to tell them how to do their jobs. In "Man of Steel", though, the cops (and the military) not only work *with* the heroes, but they can operate independently when they need to.

[@yaloolah42]

Wouldn't the police in Avengers technically also be the police from X-men...

[@Cheesusful]

@@yaloolah42 nope, different universe

[@evilynngoodwin3153]

Finally I love your after hours videos they're the reason why I subscribed.

[@Apollo-ot6tx]

Me too

[@lazerwolfdiecast]

Evilynn Goodwin samesies

[@TheBc99]

Evilynn Goodwin Yeah it's the only Cracked show I've really been able to get into and/or consistently watch.

[@Millikam12345]

Me too

[@MercenaryTau]

8:36 Soren: "Who wrote this f* script?!" 0:19 'Written by Soren Bowie'

[@bedrestjade]

Brooklyn Nine Nine or the Santa Barbara Police Department. From Psych.

[@yucky-yucky]

I was thinking that to

[@yucky-yucky]

The Psych part btw

[@glynrh8892]

B99 is a bad pick bc unless you’re in Brooklyn when Dan is dismembered you’re screwed, just about everybody else is out of touch at best or actually corrupt at worst

[@KuronoXD]

MARTHA? WHY DID YOU SAY MARTHA!?

[@lacyzapata8924]

It was Marta..lol

[@vggeek13]

sorens beginning argument has not aged well

[@ZeteticPhilosopher]

Alternatively, Soren is intentionally the hyper-masculine voice of the establishment, and his beginning argument as parody has aged very well.

[@BruceWayne-dr2zm]

I was looking for this comment I'm so glad it's here

[@panichappy9785]

4:02 man stirs invisible pot

[@ChuckNorris-zx6je]

Lol what shitty acting

[@apapods]

Chuck Norris or or or... GENIUS ACTING

[@ZeroZmm]

***** I'm pretty sure that's the grill and he's putting some spice on whatever he's cooking.

[@sartanko]

***** He never got the pot he wanted for Christmas, of course his mind is going to disassociate and pretend the pot is there with him.

[@rampant1apart]

***** The pot thickens?

[@DavidLopez-en6el]

This aged like fine wine

[@marsbones398]

This episode aged interestingly.

[@creativedesignation7880]

Rewatching these just 5 years later, I have to say so many of these hit so much different today.

[@rhodridavies9426]

Hot Fuzz. Case closed!

[@arturodejesuscruzcasab9502]

Motherfucking yes.

[@eamon4800]

little hand says its time to rock'n'roll

[@spac3cad3t57]

But wait in Hot Fuzz they have the Metropolitan Police Service transfer their best officer to a place ,where supposedly no crime happens, for the sole reason of being too good, and the place he is transferred to have police so incompetent that they don't even question why so many people go missing or are accidentally killed.

[@arturodejesuscruzcasab9502]

Dr. Professor But that's just because Frank manipulated them and fed them lies, once Nicholas told them the truth they proved to be competents cops led by Sgt. -Angle- Angel himself.

[@Advent3546]

Then we're talking post-movie where they're doing 180s in the street and bringing the noise.

[@mikeymike1792]

It's a TV show, not a movie, but surely you'd want the Brooklyn 99? Always get the job done.

[@ghezalA]

"severed heads can't talk" - _Swaimy, 2016_

[@faryalshams5523]

this aged like fine wine ACAB

[@aswallace88]

As I was typing "Two words: Police Academy", Katie said Police Academy. Damn it, just when I think I've got the scoop on them, they think of the thing I think of.

[@geraldspencer8679]

1:26 I love Soran's reaction here. It's like, whatever. 😂😂😂😂😂😂🤣

[@ivanakum61]

I laugh so hard when Soren accused Katie of killing Dan, and then Dan's reaction.

[@Rachy2049]

I want the police force from Zootopia tbh

[@Jizzfrosti]

Nah they're all really racist

[@Rachy2049]

***** Did you not watch the end of the movie? The whole point was that they broke the sterotypes and hired Nick and respected Judy.

[@Jizzfrosti]

+Lima Bean dosent get past the fact that the entire force is really under representedn

[@JediDoc]

And the only ones that solved the case is a rookie with 48h and a crook, the same job the ENTIRE dep. didn't accomplished in over 2 weeks. And just remmebr that Judy and Nick are associated with a Mafious Boss and uses a terrorist sheep to get the job done. The rest is lucky coincidence, for example the Night Howlers thing: judy grow in a farm, born form parentes too affraid to even leave their comfort zone, she does know about onions but not about the night howlers? Why did her perents told her THAT specific piece of information, about the nght howlers, when she needed for a case and not when she was a child? What if they told her just a moment too late, when the evil racist plan of the sheep was alredy accomplished and they got all predators caged or forced to wear a zap-collar?

[@Rachy2049]

TheJediDoc She did know about that vegetable, she didn't think they were onions, she just didn't know the slang name for them (because she had been raised on a farm and they used the proper names for vegetables) and her parents weren't the people that gave her that piece of information, Gideon Grey was. That aside, you act like two weeks is a long time for a case. It isn't, especially for a case so deep that the mayor was involved in the cover up. Judy got lucky, yes, but a lot of skill was involved also and she had only been working there a few days, can you imagine what she'd be like by the end of the movie as a full fledged officer with a highly observant, clever partner? Plus cops in real life use their connections, that's just common sense. That city was a highly safe city, that is why that case was such a big deal, because things like that don't happen in Zootopia because of their highly competent police force.

[@Galbotorix78]

Waited for this all month. Thank you.

[@Apollo-ot6tx]

Sorry

[@zerox2969]

Galbotorix78 thats premeditated murder, ill have to apprehend you for his murder, all the evidence leads to you, that is that there is no evidence so yeah, *reads miranda rights and drives him down to the police station*

[@lindamukarakate7511]

well,,, let's just say it ain't just movie cops anymore

[@connieallen6804]

It's simple... Hot fuzz. Case closed

[@badarbiter]

Nicolas Angel would be great. But you might get literally anyone else. And everyone else in that department are lazy and incompetent and would just rule your murder off as an accident.

[@connieallen6804]

badarbiter that would be true before the movie but after it looks like angel kinda turned the place around especially since the neighbourhood watch was disbanded

[@trueaidooo]

This is when Katie fits most into the Raphael role

[@WeirdxAnimexGirl]

Judy Hopps, thats the cop I'd want to lead the investigation of my murder.

[@Fanimati0n]

ME TOO! I JUST COMMENTED THAT! XD She's their best detective, so it's only natural that they'd give a case that inexplicable to the detective who stopped a scheming Keyser Soze-esque politician from engineering a full-scale race war she's been planning for years in like, a month, with no little to no resources aside from her intellect. She'd get shit done

[@cal943]

I want the law and order team on my case

[@ethanhorn6093]

Ah, Katie. She may not be able to travel back in time without being seen as a witch, but she sure knows how to predict the future like one.

[@Placker8102]

I've been enjoying going back through these videos and reading the newest comments. Some people get really pissed off at these videos. I rewatched the forest Gump video and the new comments where just hateful towards these people.

[@ethanhorn6093]

@@Placker8102 Its unfortunate but I am a longtime fan and a staunch opponent of gatekeeping/edition shaming. This is from a period in which people who enjoy Jordan and the current Cracked channel varieties might not understand how much the internet changed over the years... or people who hate the current content and make a point to make it everyone else's problem. It's unfortunate that the internet acts like this, but it is how it acts... can't sadly change it. But yeah... These are great to revisit... and I am glad you did.

[@SaturdayParker]

The Police department from Sherlock Holmes. If I'm lucky I'll get Sherlock.

[@whatsmyusernameagain4130]

dragongirl37582 SAAME!!

[@Northychen]

dragongirl37582 yeah but then the case wouldnt be solved by the police. That sems like outside the rules of the argument.

[@puffball4484]

lol you better make your case really interesting.

[@mooncrabs2947]

isn't sherlock a private detective

[@SaturdayParker]

Northychen The police department themselves seem competent not dumbed down or made the enemy so I'm with whoever.

[@yesitissammy]

katie said acab

[@ztancomfort187]

we stan our queen katie ✨🧚‍♂️

[@aratasman77]

Katie be living in 2020!

[@smokedoutpositivesquad1738]

Growing up watching cracked I thought I was Michael now I realize I’ve been Daniel all along

[@jondunmore4268]

0:22 -- "Protect and Serve" is a SLOGAN, not a directive, and ESPECIALLY not a law by any means. (It's like "Real Mayonnaise" - just a brand name, not really "real" by any standard of the word.) Therefore it's just a psychological stroke on the side of each police car and has nothing to do with the prosecution of their daily jobs, which *actually* involve accumulating revenue for their city through the apprehension and ticketing of citizens.

[@PunkRockMohawk]

"Sittin' in their convertibles, lickin' jelly out of each other's mouths" God, I love that line, and Katie's perfect delivery thereof.

[@chrismatthews2040]

Murdoch Mysteries. Clever deductions, impeccably well-dressed and polite policemen, crimes solved in all but 40 minutes (usually).

[@tetsuke4229]

Police department from Monty python and the holy grail?

[@lorierush8205]

Good one. lol

[@mrbenoit5018]

Cuckleberry Finn true.

[@LeoSpecter95]

Man, I miss these guys...

[@stankimsamuelbtsnctandknk4541]

this aged like milky wine lmao @C@B

[@sophia-helenemeesdetricht1957]

Yeaaaaah... Watching this in 2020 hits different

[@dean-wz2nw]

Because you're white and the cops haven't been a source of fear in your life for as long as you can remember and this comment is the most privileged fucking comment you can make Jesus Christ

[@salemkitschtrials791]

this is a great episode in 2020

[@nts3208]

Am I the only one that's absolutely in love with that redhead in the background?

[@Tkieron]

Nope. Absolutely beautiful woman. I gaze at her every time they show her.

[@d4m4s74]

Yay, new episode at the exact right moment. Under 301 club unite!

[@NumberOneVillain]

I love coming back to these old videos knowing that Daniel writes for John Oliver

[@jasonchatham4170]

Who wrote Katie’s lines. That jelly licking line is outstanding 😅

[@aint2proud2meg]

Soren wrote this one! They just talked about it on the QQ podcast

[@emilypitzer6823]

Watching this in 2020 hits different ACAB

[@heliorussell3835]

I was gonna post this exact comment! ACAB

[@trillionbones89]

You forgtot HOT FUZZ!!!

[@TheZombielayer]

Tim Boie think they were focusing an american cops

[@Megadoomface]

Tim Boie Really? The Metropolitan police send Nicholas away because he's "too good" the Sandford police department are all incompetent and run by the leader of a crazy murder cult.

[@trillionbones89]

but they learned quickly afterwards - after the movie ends they become competent :)

[@AlexanderGailson]

Tim Boie Wasn't that because of the fact that things had gotten bad without Angel/because of the media coverage? So either the entire department depends on one man to fight the cities crime or they are all media hungry whores?

[@Vicioussama]

TheZombielayer Then what about Dragnet? :O

[@timothygalvin3021]

If you count them as police, I think the Men in Black are a good example of a competent police force.

[@SoulKingXander]

The Stanford Police Service from Hot Fuzz is the best answer. Not only are they willing to tackle both internal corruption, but the secret cabal of devious seniors running their town. And not only that, but also the paperwork is gonna be handled perfectly

[@DomR1997]

Up there with one of my favorite channels. Great quality every time.

[@SuperAndrew98]

yasss! Still waiting for "Why the After Hours Universe is Secretly Terrifying" tho

[@wocathoden]

Minority Report :O ... doe's that mean that he'd still be alive?

[@ABitSoupy]

Cracked was woke before woke WAS woke

[@logancliff3134]

Brooklyn 99, i think is genuinely a good shout

[@JustinAH]

The Sheriff's Department in "No Country for Old Men" or U.S. Marshal Cogburn

[@notsosadbart6343]

Katie said ACAB before it was popular

[@AxeltheRose]

Dan is just getting hotter and hotter IMO and sorin still just as hot as before lol also I would cost Paul blart to solve my murder just sayin

[@pagingdrbitchcraft]

I was gonna say... Can we just talk about the circumference of Daniel's arms right now? Soren was in the midst of calling him a nerd, as per usual, and I swear I saw a pec flex. Lil' bicep action... Forearms rippling with testicular fortitude... What were we talking about? :3

[@Poodlekisses]

As if he wasn't sexy before, he's turning into my nerdy dreamboy

[@AxeltheRose]

Poodlekisses if i could 1+ that more than once i would lol

[@TheQuinofhearts]

Poodlekisses Dan has always been sexy (i.e. the Halloween episode). It's just been more obvious since he's decided to wear t-shirts with shorter sleeves that cling oh so nicely to his thick, meaty biceps.

[@AxeltheRose]

TheQuinofhearts yeah thats when i first noticed it but yeah those sleeves fit so nicely lol

[@joeavreg2254]

Well here is cracked coming up with today's solutions years in advance.

[@BM-zp5ec]

The answer has to be die hard right? The response time is on point after Carl Winslow calls for back up after his car was turned into “Swiss cheese” lol

[@verdatum]

I mean, if I'm getting murdered in LA, then I want Lt. Colombo. So long as I'm a middle-aged white guy in the upper-middle class or higher, it is guaranteed that the case will be assigned to him. Last Action Hero would also be a decent choice, but that is kinda cheating, as it is already meta. Now if only there was a film version of Law & Order. Those guys are crazy thorough.

[@AGothNamedWednessday]

Me in 2020 Cackling in agreement with Katie. This sketch aged interestingly. Oh Soren, you unaware bootlicker

[@Laughing_Chinaman]

minority report

[@stevenyanis9051]

I was gonna go with M.R. As well, but the problem here is they arrest the wrong people sometimes. And that's like bad...like really really bad...like the life David Gale bad...

[@EinDose]

It's hard to enter Minority Report into this debate, since the argument presumes we're getting the force to deal with a murder that's already happened. Minority Report's whole thing is pre-crimes, stopping something that's GOING to happen. They're probably really terrible at dealing with post-crimes. Either way, it's similar to Person of Interest, which really explores how bad an idea the whole 'crime-predicting computer system' thing is. At best, you're just trading one set of problems for another by going with a prediction machine, and not necessarily in a way that's going to help stop a murder.

[@Seriona1]

Steven Yanis Plus you have no freedom of privacy but I guess the saying is true; you can have freedom or security, but you're not getting both.

[@AmityvilleFan]

Steven Yanis And they were corrupt.

[@ПеризатИскакова-н5л]

*****

[@Super21208]

Sherlock Holmes and Watson are the ideal choice aren't they?

[@MaT1cus]

Brandinnoo No, you get the department. And they're not technically "police".

[@AvangionQ]

Brandinnoo The cops in the Sherlock movies tended to be incompetent, allowing Sherlock to shine via deductive reasoning and evidence gathering skills.

[@kinoinck1946]

AvangionQ Although, despite the fact that it's in the show (BBC's Sherlock) and not any of the movies, the police do a fairly good job. Only a few of the cases Sherlock and John solved were they employed by the police. A fair few of the cases they have solved were brought to them by clients, or even once or twice Mycroft (now that Im thinking about it, some of the cases Sherlock solved that the police could not were basically being "led" by Moriarty, and Moriarty's whole plan was to get Sherlock's attention). Either way, if you couldnt take Sherlock and John, the police force in the show is not half bad.

[@Thoran666]

AvangionQ Holmes uses induction not deduction. A great article from a logics professor explaining the difference: logic.umwblogs.org/induction-and-deduction/

[@Super21208]

MaT1cus I thought they were considered a private company which would make them a two man department.

[@RabblesTheBinx]

The correct answer is the Central City PD. Solid, effective, honest detectives, plus the lead CSI is both a supergenius and a superhero.

[@megashillyshally]

The opening misunderstanding joke is still a stone cold classic.

[@slashandbones13]

most of the cops in robocop seem to do their job the best they can under the cirectistances

[@gargamellenoir8460]

***** Do they? They managed to let the criminals grow up to army size, can't send reinforcement in time for shit, are underpaid and undermanned...

[@Leedark3]

***** And there is a good chance that, as long as your murderer wasn't an Omnicorp executive (and maybe even if it was) Robocop himself WOULD be on your case.

[@slashandbones13]

Gargamel Le Noir under the circumstances of working in a version of Detroit that frank miller would call over the top, ya they do the best they can

[@buttAttack]

***** also the cops in that movie are in bed with a super powerful weapons making company that allows a experimental war machine (also known as robo cop) onto the force with little supervision.

[@MugenNiFukuzatsuna]

***** Ding ding ding ding. We have a winner!

[@maxwellmarte]

You guys need to post more After Hours.

[@yaboymart3237]

No mention of robocop?

[@1967sluggy]

General police force.

[@AvangionQ]

Bilbo baggins That city was almost a lost cause, gang armies running around ...

[@tenkenroo]

Bilbo baggins a corporation owned a cop.

[@GeneralG1810]

The Wolf Oh like todays police 0.0

[@aidenwood2273]

Hey stated that you can't hand pick the cop you are picking the whole department not just Robocop

[@carsonbassi6371]

hearing Abe in the outtakes say “Soren script.” 😌

[@Zahnpuppy]

This is my favorite show on the internet.

[@Advent3546]

If they included tv shows; the obvious answer is Reno 911

[@sithotaku]

they are shitty but hilariously shitty and get my vote for president/god. all of em lol

[@envirex]

Scotland yard from Sherlock Holmes

[@Fanimati0n]

Nope, Special Victims Unit *DUN DUN*

[@leopayne410]

Brooklyn nine nine

[@lorenzoduron4848]

Reno 911: Miami Take-down

[@plucas1]

How about the Judges from Judge Dredd? They got future tech, psychic cops, and they ARE the Law.

[@Drudenfusz]

plucas1 And they are quite fascist/totalitarian, I don't want to live in a society with such a law enforcement.

[@Drudenfusz]

***** Actually, I doubt the would solve it, there are not enough Judges for the amount of crime and the city far too large to solve every crime. The judges would probably only investigate if it is a serial killer or would other wise disturb the society.

[@Drudenfusz]

***** Since the mention stuff like the Noir genre, I assumed the whole setting would be that of the cops. If it would be indeed our world, then I would expect a revolution against those cops, and thus even less espect them to solve the death.

[@420Slaterson]

plucas1 I mean they just avoid trial all together and can just execute perpetrators on the spot.

[@federico237]

plucas1 Forgetting about Dredd, 3 years in isolation cubes!

[@bijoyroy11]

This video is so relevant now during the BLM movement. Pity it didn't trend and bring back some attention to Cracked.

[@Y20XTongvaLand]

Dan tipping the money he couldve saved from the kitchen's error on his ticket is inspiring.

[@unclerat2131]

All police between 1932 and 1968 were competent, effective, and got the bad guy in the end. It was part of the production code of that time, and any time a cop was portrayed they could not be a bad apple unless they were completely taken down by the end of the film. The production code so telegraphed the film story that you knew what would happen in the end without any trouble at all. Production code history is well worth studying.

[@dean-wz2nw]

Wait you don't mean in real life right? because lynchings and open fucking racism