Why Narcissists Try to Provoke You (and How to Deal With It the RIGHT WAY)

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

📌Got a narcissist who’s trying to provoke you? Join me in this FREE webinar and discover how to crush them in 3 simple steps. Click here now:👉 www.rebeccazung.com/live

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

I will be there to answer all your questions!

[@brettweary8491]

@@RebeccaZungEsq My Mum is 92 and will NeverStop I Until I am Dead or I Get to Retire to Vietnam if I Can Fly After Vaccination Rebecca My Heart has been Damaged by Her non Stop Narcissistic Behaviour Rebecca

[@lovewhitey2027]

@@brettweary8491 you need to disconnect someway somehow these demons will destroy you

[@michelin5182]

Can you imagine mine is a doctor and those simptoms are typical for him , but I will mention and he is collecting a garbage 🗑️ at home

[@ronniejames8151]

Complete truth

[@cymbolichuman433]

They want you to lose it, so they look sane. But we all know better.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Definitely agreed!

[@kahlodiego5299]

Wow - isn't that the best?!

[@pinkposey8134]

I pinch my forefinger and thumb together, not hard but is distracts from my emotional response. Then we calm down. Thank you so much!!!!

[@MH-cv5ye]

@@pinkposey8134 interesting. I try and think 'hey, I know what they want, a reaction of emotions... Don't give it!'- but wow, it's difficult. Stay cool, everyone! Have a great day. 😎✔

[@meredithtaylor6532]

Thank you for that. This is exactly where I am right now. I feel like I am loosing my mind. But this makes me feel a bit better. I'm not nuts. And yes he talks about his first memory was of pooping himself and not yet having the verbal skills to get help so he just screamed...he brings that up alot

[@aliacampbell7227]

They get SO ANGRY when you do not react. It’s crazy.

[@kellifrumento8992]

Because they are nuts

[@kanchanyadav1313]

@@kellifrumento8992 😂 right

[@artfull334]

@@kanchanyadav1313 it’s not funny. They try to destroy another’s happiness, they wreck close ones lives!

[@artfull334]

@@kellifrumento8992 they’re not crazy, they know exactly what they’re doing. Any conversation with one is destructive to their victim

[@MissNyPeachJerseyAppleBottom]

It’s so funny to be I laugh in the inside😂

[@TheListOf]

They want attention even if its bad attention. They can't handle being ignored and avoided. They get very angry, hostile, and aggressive.

[@theritual23]

You said it all, when you described them as toddlers in adult bodies. It’s absolutely it. Our mistake is looking at them as adults.

[@00M13-m9f]

This realization was key for me finally being able to handle this b.s. better

[@ancamarr681]

Don’t let emotion interfere no matter what they do or say. Expect bad behavior. Don’t react to it! Poker face!😱

[@leeboriack8054]

If a narc tries to provoke me, I "grey rock" or just dont respond w any emotion. A drama free response and they hate it.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Exactly!

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

@@leeboriack8054 good idea!

[@sofiaruby603]

This is so hard to do especially living in a studio . My adult kid is narc. Cant take it anymore.

[@curlyydancer]

@@sofiaruby603 Kick him out, make him get a job and stand on his own two feet. No one deserves to be a prisoner in their own home. Especially when YOU pay the bills. I moved out at 17 to escape my narc family. Now 10 years later I had a kid with a narc .

[@monarchmark]

I immediately block those kind of people without fail. Negotiating with a narcissist is like standing on a roof top and arguing with a severe thunderstorm.

[@gilgilbert5866]

Who wins? LOL

[@wilfridjoseph6172]

Lol good analogy

[@MissNyPeachJerseyAppleBottom]

😅😅this was so good

[@msliberated3899]

Wow! That’s a wild description

[@davvydivine]

Just pointless.

[@davidhinkson8856]

I notice when you ignore them for a while they would attempt to provoke you so they can get their high.

[@lovewhitey2027]

Yes mine had a nurse call from hospital he was in auto accident

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Definitely

[@PrettyToez07]

Yes, happens frequently.

[@anicoleratliff2681]

All the time. It's exhausting.

[@sofiaruby603]

Thats exactly what happened today..exactly !

[@dreamer5329]

They are bullies of the playground of life...period.

[@cr3062]

If they can provoke you..they know they are in control of you and manipulating your emotions.

[@PJAndersson733]

They’re sick human beings. That’s all I can say after dealing with an entire family of them. There are many different types of narcs, different characteristics but all have the SAME foundational beliefs. THEMSELVES. Everything is about them. Their needs. Their wants. Their demands. Their respect. They will project all their characteristics onto you and put all their flaws onto you. The most important advice I have is to educate yourself!!! Videos like this and others are incredibly valuable to and pertinent to interacting with them in this world. And trust me, they really are everywhere. Don’t let yourself be burned by them.

[@macianodog1329]

@@PJAndersson733 Me to the whole family is insane it's so awful I'm sorry you going through this I went no contact and they fighting me tooth and nail

[@hopeinhumanity.]

The vulnerable type appear to provoke to get a reaction so that they can feel like the victim and tell people they are the abused one.

[@EverythingxBeautiful]

Yes exactly..😔

[@anaphylaxis2548]

Ah, I see that you know my sister.

[@jach.9138]

This was a particularly hurtful action by the narcs.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Totally!

[@anicoleratliff2681]

My current situation

[@Evernia6181]

I just can’t wrap my head around the fact that these people carry on like this

[@annvalentine7148]

So true. Best protection is to pretend you don't care, even if you do. You are no longer injured by their abuse, worried that anyone will believe their lies, or intimidated by their threats. nothing to get here.

[@silentassassin47]

lucky you

[@silentassassin47]

@@tjd7964 yeah

[@geoffgreenwood3243]

I'm 98% effective at this, and I know it's right. What should I do if I briefly lost it for a moment, snapped back briefly, then composed myself, but find my self ruminating over it days later? 😂

[@msliberated3899]

@@geoffgreenwood3243forgive yourself and move on in your beautiful life, learn the lesson and stay away from them.

[@loekiekanters4295]

Truth. Some of them treat you like a toddler because they're afraid you'll find out they're still a toddler.

[@jennifer5712]

Truth plus after provoking you, they get to tell family and friends how horrible you are.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Exactly. Heinous.

[@anicoleratliff2681]

Also landlords and co-workers

[@spicyphilly]

YES! Omgosh this is what I'm currently dealing with. It's so confusing. And now he tells me how everyone thinks he's crazy for talking to me.

[@dorothyesked1802]

Yes my ex would create drama once I was provoked and fought back he would tell friends, family, and all his flying monkeys what an awful person I was and he was always the victim. True

[@MissNyPeachJerseyAppleBottom]

@@spicyphilly confusing is not of God

[@Lovinvallarta]

Truth! My narcissist actually said he finds it fun to get me upset. What shocked me was his admission!

[@scottdunn2178]

Narcissism is an extreme overcompensation for extreme insecurity...

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Totally!

[@scottdunn2178]

@@RebeccaZungEsq Tawny Kitaen was a prime example. Tender heart... but a tortured mind. I just exchanged DM's with her on Twitter when her dad died April 12th, and she was more concerned with the people who were worried about her rather than the other way around. I got a really sweet DM from Tawny on the 14th (my birthday) saying thank you for my kind words. I just heard that the police didn't find any evidence of drugs... so, if that's the case then I'm sure she just died of a broken heart having just lost her dad.

[@MygirlsGJPB]

@@scottdunn2178 that doesn't sound like narcissistic behavior. Codependent maybe?

[@kahlodiego5299]

Heartbreaking - and after 3 years of being stalked and harassed do I feel empathy? FUCK 'EM AND EVERYONE WHO SUPPORTS AND COVERS UP FOR THEM.

[@truthseeker1871]

In terms of insecurity from what I have seen these crudbuckets create their own insecurity in part through the damage they do to the people into which they thrust their fangs. No, the narcissist will get to sympathy from me.

[@jeffreyjackson5229]

A sense of control, power, and attention. All these are a part of their composition.

[@msliberated3899]

Satan

[@liesbethdevries4986]

If it's new, it's mine, mine, mine. When it's broken, it's yours.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Yup! Exactly!

[@bunnyboo6295]

Sounds familiar

[@heidijohnson5262]

And when it’s broke, it’s YOUR fault.

[@DaTaJaSi]

✨Sooooo true! No matter what it is! As long as it’s new!!

[@EBUNNY2012]

"Before you get too bothered about the narcissists, remember, they are figured out, they are not winning, they are in their own hell; so, set boundaries, don't gossip, walk away and let them get fixed and let them build the bridges they burned." - brian padrick drake

[@mayank64723]

Don't gossip. Isn't gossiping itself a trait shown by narc(to inflate their egos)?

[@NOHANDLEMADEBYME]

Thank you. Their #1 trait is gossip. Smear campaigns. In a nightmare of narc. stalker w/access to every phone. They used whomever possible for flying monkeys. Hoping we get out of this alive.

[@Chidiuche]

True! They enjoy making others sad. The only problem these days is that narcissists are now the ones calling their victims and other people narcissists.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Totally!

[@delicatedominance]

This is so true.

[@miriamhavard7621]

BINGO!

[@Cedargal5560]

It’s all about provoking, especially after they lost themselves. They desperately want you to lose too. If you finally had enough and be firm and emotionless, they would say this is your true face and you’re the evil one. My ex rotated in different methods so quickly, super calm and reasonable apologies and explanation, angry accusations, and sadness and depression as if his life was falling apart. The most horrible thing is the persistence.

[@evolvingthedarknesstarot8440]

They get off on being able to control your feelings. Feelings are very important. Feelings are powerful.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪 This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/

[@danieljinkins3267]

Agreed. When we see it run. 🏃

[@seanwoods1963]

Yeah, agree with you. It's that little satisfied smile that they can't quite suppress that gives them away.

[@HippieGoddess142]

Or that feeling of relief you sense from them (empath here) once you react to their abuse and get “mean” with them. Like “Yes! She’s not the perfect, nice person I saw her as. She’s flawed like me!”

[@tracysapp3069]

The narcissistic smirk.

[@armsitchy7623]

@@tracysapp3069 absolutely the smirk gives them away

[@dawnshively6731]

Yea i seen that smile it sickens me

[@dawnshively6731]

Yea i seen that smile it sickens me

[@brucefeagler980]

They never apologize for anything that they say or do that hurts someone.There appears to be lack of empathy.

[@scottfipps1491]

Truth! You agree with everything they think or do, don’t rock the boat by having autonomy. It is like dealing with a 3 year old that wants you to die a terrible death if the wrong word comes out of your mouth. It is inconceivable.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Totally!

[@louiserodmore7284]

Absolutely! This has been my life for the last two years and always knew there was something not quite right - and realised this week that he’s a covert narcissist to the letter.

[@lisakeenan]

Yes and put you down make you feel like your not good enough

[@justlookalittledeeper9953]

Truth! The narcissist may stare you down, do a face scan, to see if the provocation is working. It can double as intimidation. If they do it in your peripheral line of sight, it'll feel like you've got a velociraptor hunting you. They may even do the more ridiculous head tilt or head bob, when they're doing a gotcha scan.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Totally!

[@PrettyToez07]

You're spot on with this one.

[@anubisoftllc]

My narcissist ex did that face scan thing. Anytime she detected a whiff of happiness crossing my face the abuse would begin. To deal with it I would grey rock her but I ended up suppressing my normally vibrant personality and that also negatively affected my career.

[@shebakali6]

This is why you go grey rock. Don’t show emotions, good or bad. I also turn my face away to roll my eyes or smirk at their drama to make sure they do not see my facial expressions, which is all supply for them.

[@nushraziyan1772]

My narcissistic mother in law does it.🥺

[@grannybear3960]

Truth. They provoke in order to upset, so then the narcissist has an excuse to punish their target with actions they would do anyway, but if the target looses their cool, the narcissistic will insist to themselves, the enablers, the flying monkeys, and the target, that it is all the fault of the target. They know it hurts. That, also, to them, is power.

[@prschuster]

They can't grasp the fact that there are really kind hearted people in the world who would actually help them out of the kindness of their heart. They see pthers as potential enemies or competitors who must be defeated.

[@dianevanderlinden3480]

or exploited

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪 This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/

[@jonlattanz]

As I watch this, I have just finished extricating myself from a narcissists life. I made the mistake of having this individual live with me and I chose to leave unannounced and cease all contact. Everything you’re saying is so true.

[@scottdunn2178]

They like shaking the tree and see if they can get any fruit (narcissistic supply) to drop.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Such a great way to describe it!

[@poppykoch9085]

They provoke, argue, you argue back. They up the ante (toddler tantrum) by shouting at you until you break down so again they win! I have never heard these topics so well put. The epiphanies you provide are making it easier for me to deal with a narcissistic family member and forgive myself for standing up for myself.

[@heatherpesterfield8121]

They will seek out your weak spots and use these against you …they do things you asked them nicely not to and in the end sometimes sadly you do get upset and they seem happy when this happens and they seem to have no real emotions towards you They can carry on the day like it was you not them But what they don’t like is when they do not succeed especially if you stone wall them and carry on smiling

[@simonverbick973]

What i have learned as well is that they want you to be in the mood that they want you to be in..

[@geneman4]

Truth, she tells me that no one will ever love me like she did.

[@debrabostwick2250]

My narc ex husband said the same thing when I escaped his clutches. He also said no man would be as good in bed as he was! Arrogant, pompous jerk.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

All lies!

[@5winder]

Thank God.

[@kiyokowilkinson158]

@@debrabostwick2250 , I am being told the same thing but I really believe he is right about that nobody will ever love me again I am very savaged person now but I'd rather be alone than keep going through this i think . Working on it now . Pray for me please I am a handicapped woman and that's constantly used against me now . Je broke me and plays the victim because of this now . Makes me sick to my stomach , honestly .

[@debrabostwick2250]

@@kiyokowilkinson158 you are more worthy of being loved again then he will ever be. I will keep you in my positive thoughts and prayers.

[@brendaleverick3655]

Whenever my arc and I are arguing, he will always say, "see, this is why everybody is always mad at you.". He always brings others into it that have nothing to do with what we're arguing about.

[@shebakali6]

Never JADE a narcissist. Justify, argue defend or explain. It is a waste of time. You are just giving them what they want, which is narcissistic supply.

[@brendaleverick3655]

@@shebakali6 You are absolutely right. Thank you!

[@shebakali6]

@@brendaleverick3655 your welcome. I have many techniques bc I am temporarily stuck living with one. #1. Grey rock. Don’t show positive or negative emotions. #2, keep a daily journal for insights on dealing with them and your feelings. 3. Reprogram your subconscious with positive affirmations (“ I only connect with normal and healthy people, I please myself first, I invest in my own self first, I love myself unconditionally, etc). 4. Quantify the time you spend with them. For ex, if you have to spend 3 hours in one day, try to have very minimal contact for the next 3 days. 5. Develop the spiritual practice of mouna. (Silence). So that means you don’t have to listen or speak for a certain time or on certain days. 6. Earplugs. Cover your ears with hair if you can. Their drama making is almost comical when you hear it muffled. 6. Develop meditation practice to neutralize negativity. I put mine gently into a dumpster and the dumpster dumps her into the dump and I say, god deal with her bc I can’t. Then I replace that scene with a nice visual and add sounds, colours etc. 7. When they start their drama, Say you have to urgently go to the washroom. Use any technique that you can to stop thinking of them. In a month you will notice a big difference. Hope this helps 🙏🏾

[@brendaleverick3655]

@@shebakali6 Yes, thanks!

[@michaelkennedy5126]

Just say, no I don't see, and tell him to take an online logic course because it's impossible for "everyone" to think the same about you.

[@michelewuensch8468]

This has been proven in brain studies. Their brains are different from normal brains. Pleasure centers light up when they view suffering.

[@morganreese4257]

So my narc’s brain should look like a fireworks 💥 factory explosion..

[@truthseeker1871]

Thank you ever so much, Michele, for the corroboration.

[@olguiq1013]

EVIL PEOPLE....

[@olguiq1013]

TRUTH!!!

[@jenamirgholi6004]

ya, i see people get happy when they see a person that is upset. seen it several times. stunned and shocked at humanity. people are disgraceful. joy when Jesus returns.

[@PBVader]

Truth, and facts. "What's mine is mine, and what's yours is mine." And "I'm gonna move things around and make you think you are going crazy." Watch out for these code words!

[@donking454]

I’ve been rinsed by my gf and her kid and when I needed their help they ran to the hills…. It’s what narcs do, use you and when they can’t use you no more they get rid of you.

[@aharry31]

Narcissists are like impudent imps always looking for a thrill at someone elses' expense. When they get a new supply they are jolly dang gleeful due to the cruel damage caused by them of the discarded supply and the admiration of the new supply.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Yep. Awful.

[@libs5382]

100% they do enjoy it, and you can see it in their faces. I think they get off on people's anxiety and helplessness. Like a power-trip. Thank you

[@ruthyoung1032]

So glad I finally understand that they enjoy watching you squirm because I am totally grey rock and don't let them get to me anymore. They're sick and I'm so disgusted. Soo much needless suffering I've been through since childhood 😡. Grew up and married a covert. I'm being well educated and taking corrective action

[@shelly-annjohn4965]

Miss Ruth these people are more than sick they are demon possess .God is great put your trust in him.You be ok take care stay bless.shelly from trinidad Caribbean.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Sending you light

[@wendy7062]

That wake up moment is so glorious. To know it has a name and you are not alone!

[@lillumination5388]

They are parasitic, very destructive. Walk away, and you will cut their supply, and they will self-destroyed through mental deterioration. Watch the show.

[@aspaerialshotphotography8906]

"Truth" My mom is still like this till this very day she'll never change

[@craig3714]

Truth they love provoking me for sure !

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

So totally true.

[@gracievargas6607]

“YES!!!!”, you’re absolutely correct every time I cared less of what he would talk to me about the more he would blow up and I would just keep my posture calm cool collective.. I never allowed him to destroy my piece

[@bluecollarlit]

peace: calm, happy piece: a piece of cloth

[@debrabostwick2250]

Truth. My ex husband narc once told me he enjoyed taunting people and then lay back and watch them respond! Jerk.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

At least he's honest about his narcissism. :) LOL. In all seriousness, I send you light and support. They suck to deal with.

[@alonzomosley7]

Sounds exactly like my Machiavellian brother Jerk

[@love_yourself_jj]

Yes yes they love seeing us heartbroken and hurt 💔 I agree and ruining holidays and getting us jealous just to make us feel down 💔 it's so hard to live with them

[@onajourney2072]

You know our civilisation is devolving fast when narcissism is so widespread.

[@CH-jz2xz]

True - I noticed smiles and giggles from him when I get upset. So now, I don't react, I don't reply when it is not necessary. When I reply, it is short and simple. When the argument immediately goes no where. I hang up.

[@leeboriack8054]

Narcs have the mindset of "the haves and the have nots". If you are happy w out the narc, the narc becomes a have not. The narc breaks your happiness so they can raise themselves up.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Definitely true.

[@johnbrackett5818]

It's like seesaw. They put you down and they go up.

[@deborahemx2]

Been there, done that. They try the same old crap over and over.

[@kenndaily8451]

My narcissist was not only elated by making others "squirm," but he became ecstatic anytime anyone experienced a challenge. One guy was scammed by a counterfeiter, and my narcissist couldn't wait to tell everyone. Another guy endured a serious injury, and my narcissist thoroughly enjoyed his suffering.

[@lovewhitey2027]

I know many of these demons They actually salivate 🤬at others pain Its disgusting....

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Horrible!

[@kisigma1011]

@@lovewhitey2027 true 💯

[@PBVader]

My ex narc laughs or giggles when someone sustains an injury. Now I know why. WTF

[@janetbish3778]

My sister loves when others squirm and brags about it to me. I sit there in shock time after time.

[@priscillamarie2474]

Along with the abuse Im rebuilding my trust for myself so THIS RIGHT HERE is a HUGE confirmation 🙌🏼🙏

[@catlady6938]

My ex provoked me too much, I had stopped giving him his supply so he would do the silent treatment which he knew drove me mad, in the end I had enough and I walked away. They really are stupid, if they stopped doing these awful things people might not leave them.

[@smarsh2307]

This video helped calm me down from calling out my ex, and how he's handled bringing new people around our son. I know he's doing it to get a rise out of me, but it's heartbreaking that he's choosing others over spending time with his kid.

[@Gina1809085]

This is spot on. I'm having a difficult time not feeling guilty about even knowing

[@christianpulisic7784]

Gina Spradlin,You don't need a narc 😈 in your life!!

[@Akira300]

TRUTH. No lie my ex wife narc during one talk she was having with me she kept interrupting her own conversation with me by asking "Are you crying? Are you crying?". She was looking to see if she was making me emotional. I've never heard or seen anything like that but that's how gross they are. And she was looking for it because she WAS GETTING SOMETHING OUT OF IT! Sick! 🤮

[@kenoy347]

Crazy people they confuse the hell out of you

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Definitely

[@sallyvlosich9115]

That was a shocker to me ... did not recognize that I was crying and did not care.

[@simoner615]

So true. No empathy if you're crying. Wowwww. I forgot that one

[@CutePokapipi]

Rebecca you don't know how you have saved my life. It's easy for you to just make a video and upload it but for someone like me to find this specific information makes all the difference in my life. Getting saved from trauma and domestic abuse is what I have achieved from your education. Thank you for this. God bless you.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪 This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/

[@barbara9423]

I JUST LOVE YOUR ANALOGY

[@teal1010]

I don't think Narcissists are highly skilled at figuring out your weaknesses. They Watch, Listen and Study you for that purpose!

[@v.1695]

Yup!

[@oileengrace8228]

Yes, he enjoys it when I cry. He laughs at the news of anyone suffering. He thinks they're dumb.

[@kenndaily8451]

The narcissist's smear campaign may be a means of causing pain.

[@Haley497]

Sad truth is what really inflicts that pain is seeing everybody eat it up with a spoon. The narc could smear me to the moon and back I wouldn't care, but when I see the smear effectively working everywhere with (almost) everyone... The only silver lining is getting to know who really knows you and is immune, but jobs, social circles, schools, courts, even therapists (who oughta know better), then it's nearly impossible not to squirm.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Definitely

[@anicoleratliff2681]

@@Haley497 I agree

[@kenndaily8451]

@@Haley497 yep. It's surprising how many "believers" there are.

[@heatherpesterfield8121]

Spot on , they need to have a supply and will create a situation, and find something that upsets or annoys you and they are like a person with a stick and they will keep poking you ,until you either ignore or until they get a reaction from you,and I caught one out because of the smile afterwards. Seems after upsetting anyone ,they seem happier and smiling while they know that you are now upset . They can flirt , and wait for your reaction and then say you’re a lier ,they will always play the victim. .

[@bradmcewen]

The truth here is that Rebecca has hit another cognitive dissonance obliterating, trauma bond ending, its not you, its them, game winning home run ! Great video !

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Thank you! So glad it's working for you!

[@dickturpin435]

'Nobody needs to tell me about the faults of other people. I can see them every time I take me eyes off my own.' Anon.

[@suebashir9160]

💯 % Everything you said is on 🎯. He always acts like a toddler. Just happened on Mother’s Day any Holiday, they have to ruin the day. I have been putting up with his crap for over 30 years. He’s controlled my life to the point I have no confidence and he had kept me from working and I have no means to provide to live a life the same income as I do now if I leave him. My daughter can’t stand her father and has begged me to leave him and divorce.....nothing more that I would like to do then to get out but I can’t see a way how. Every day he abuses my children and me.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Sending you light. Come join me on my free webinar if you’d like too.

[@maramabdallah5479]

Welcome to my world ! 😔

[@curlyydancer]

Give yourself permission to set a goal for yourself and chase after it relentlessly. Don’t stay. Your daughter may continue the pattern. I did because I watched my mother ignore me begging her to leave since I was 3, and it ends with my daughter. Stop the pain cycle

[@michellecodispoti6203]

I feel you. I’m going through this as well and feel regret for not leaving. I feel my children have been affected by this their whole life. He will berate, ignore and dismiss me right in front of them. Like I don’t even exist. So I was just told by my daughter why do I keep trying? You both don’t like each other. It hurts bc inside I’ll always love him and thought it could get better but 26 years of marriage later nothing has changed. The guilt feelings I have about how my kids have lived their life upsets me so much. We can never get those years back.

[@zabby9294]

Truth! They enjoy when you are upset. It's madness. Living it right now.

[@RB-jq6gh]

This explains all my old employers.

[@myrajefferson3672]

Truth! I am so glad that you mentioned gift-giving! The narcissist that I know is the biggest gift giver ever, and sadly, this fools a few people in the family! Thank you your advice is priceless!

[@bws1971]

I wonder whether any narcissist has ever prompted so much supply that they got put in the hospital. AFAF

[@lovewhitey2027]

Combustion 💥🤬🤬☠️💥⚠️

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Awful!

[@danbride9407]

Yes I was dealing with one financially and we broke communication for about 2 to 3 weeks and when we connected again he told me he was in the hospital some thing to do with his heart ❤ and he couldn't take it any longer he still owes me money to this day I think he said he's getting out of that kind of work capital one figured it out with me there was fraud going on and there was another this one was a woman this was a similar situation she also couldn't take it any longer and she turned her self into a retreat for a couple of weeks she came back but I stopped dealing with her she still owes me a lot of money

[@bws1971]

@@RebeccaZungEsq To be clear, I was being facetious

[@viola1980]

My mother used to be like that. Luckily she is dead. She was a very sick, lonely woman who had no friends and family got more and more distant from her. The toddler in an adult body is sooo true! Thank you so much for this video! Such an insight into the topic!

[@ErikaRodriguez-db5kg]

TRUE! This soon to be ex-husband is such pain on my neck and arms. I literally feel physically sick from his abusive patterns. I hope this divorce process gets to be done soon. I am very emotionally overwhelmed with having to represent myself for my own divorce. Thank you so much for all the information you provide.

[@keith4239]

truth. Thanks again Rebecca.

[@vikensmedia]

Thank you Rebecca for the professional information 😊

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Glad it was helpful!

[@CapitalK66]

TRUTH! They are the freaking worst people ever! My ex narc husband realized early in our marriage that the best way to hurt me was to pit my daughters against me. The parental alienation he’s orchestrated against me has been devastating. My heart is broken for myself, selfishly but more importantly, the damage he’s doing to my poor daughters.

[@mariacamacho4782]

You totally described my husband, I call him a 2 year old toddler that has a tantrum when he doesn’t get his way. 😁

[@pratibhapanghal]

Same here

[@reesedaniel5835]

What's really fun is when they get older and this behavior becomes more revolting and obnoxious at the same time they gain weight, go bald and lose their good looks. In my case it was like going from being married to a young and handsome Burt Reynolds, to an old and ugly Uncle Fester. With the secondary mentality of a mean and comically malicicous 10 year old like Pugsly (Adams Family). He actually thinks its funny to fart over and over when in my company (a form of disrespect) and act obnoxiously silly in a childish way yet subtley mean at the same time, like a Jim Carey skit. I feel trapped and miserable at this stage in life when I have somewhat healed and grown (from childhood narc abuse from a covert narc mother). Been no contact with family of origin for 10 years, parents are now dead and the previously (intermittetly) hidden narc in husband is fully "blooming" now.

[@Dchc4444]

Truth! We are trying to figure out my new neighbor, and everything you mentioned here describes him! He stares badly at me, not my husband. He opens his door multiple times quietly to see what we’re saying when we are outside on our back deck. One time at night, he aggressively jumped out on his back deck and gave me a cold stare. Another time I was walking in front of my house and through his open window I heard him say to me quietly, “Quack quack!” I’m sure he was imitating me on how I walk. He’s trying to provoke me, so from now on I will ignore him.

[@craig3714]

Describing my father again he acts just like your describing !

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Ughh! Sending you light.

[@heatherpesterfield8121]

They think they are special And that they seem to get away with stuff and have excuses for their behavior and expect you to accept this.Sometimes they are gas lighting and other times they get caught out and use pathetic excuses why they did this .The thing is they are always testing you and waiting for your reaction and when you get really upset ..they seem to have won .so be aware and don’t let them play this game .

[@carolfcavanagh3835]

Yes you’re absolutely right about their wanting the Total Control!!

[@debrastover9801]

My sister thought it was "funny" to ask me what I got for Mother's Day at my son's funeral visitation (which was Mother's Day 2008). I was so hurt by it and she was elated. I've finally been able to cut off my relationship with her. Outside the occasional chit chat whenever I have to tell her something concerning our parents. Thank you for your KZbin videos they have helped me to see how much she affected my life. My first memory of her is "I hate you I wish you had never been born". She's such a cruel person. I have forgiven her but I won't be around her unless it's absolutely necessary.

[@kristalynnmertz]

Your videos have been incredibly reassuring as I have learned after 47 years who my mom is and why she is so awful to me. Not outwardly in ways anyone else would notice, but passive aggressively in ways I can feel in my soul. The narcissist is the most sensitive person in the world. And when you know them well, you’ll ironically notice they are themselves not only insensitive as hell, but insulting af and will put you down and blame you for everything because they see you as overly sensitive (i.e., “WEAK”, as they will clearly imply - probably with a smile as they lap up your pain and receive their supply).

[@kellydivine6648]

I really enjoyed this. I am taking care of my dementia Narcissistic Mother. I wish I would of known this when I was 19 yrs. old. Thank you.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪 This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/

[@rfdave3980]

You speak the truth. Everything you says is so true. You describe these people I know.

[@essencer.9494]

"You're treating me like your enemy and I don't know why!" (as he wished harm on my dog, bring up my past traumas randomly, literally telling me I don't have the right to my own autonomy, ect) Scariest time of my life (which says A LOT). It came into undeniable clarity when I heard my "man" talking about "beating" me and KILLING me when (I assume) he thought I was sleeping. (I was in the room, he was in the living room, and you could hear very easily.) "No, no. Babe, that's not me. You know it's not. It's a demon!" Yup sure was. Except they're one in the same.

[@stephaniemathieson9910]

Yes…. 🙌🏻 I don’t know why you hate me or teat me this way… after they kidnapped my newborn baby 😩

[@essencer.9494]

@@stephaniemathieson9910 so sorry. I can't imagine

[@sandbachmerrygold8558]

This is the TRUTH.

[@pureevillexus]

Truth!!! I'm actually dealing with a roommate (in HUD housing) where my roommate has provoked me. First, by bringing her friends to our place to disrespect me, taking my processions (such as clothing and other items), sometimes walking into my room while I'm away, while feeling as if I'm walking on eggshells due to her control issues. I also dealt with her calling the cops where she would file false police reports and she lies incessantly by putting herself in victimized position. Believe it or not, this is a summarized version of what I'm putting in the comments right now. Theres more to the story where I'm going to be making a KZbin video about because I'm so sick of it! The way they provoke you is very insiduous and sadistic in ways nobody can imagine! Seriously, everything you had mentioned in this video is so spot on.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪 This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/

[@pureevillexus]

Hi Rebecca! I'm doing a somewhat better now but went through a very tumultuous time after making that comment on this video. My former roommate instigated a fight that happened almost two years ago )once August 28 comes). Long story short and even though she put her hands on me, she found a way to manipulate the police and pressed charges on me plus got me evicted where I was homeless again and going from place to place, ended up in a terrible respite (where I felt institutionalized) until I finally got my own apartment from SPA housing. I'm still recovering from all of this while I was dealing with cluster b type family members that invalidated me constantly. I officially went no contact 9 months ago though I still text my siblings every now and then to still keep them at arms length. I've been through enough with my family's abuse where I'm very prone to getting abused by a stranger in this world alone. I also want to thank you for the link you sent me though I think there is some type of error when I tap on the green section on the website.

[@danieljinkins3267]

I want to thank her for exposing these crazy makers. Stay away from them my friends. Know that they are the ones at fault’s. Don’t react. It only makes them look right.

[@Dee-kg9lk]

TRUTH! Thank you for all you share! Love your videos!💜🙏

[@christianpulisic7784]

Dee,Your lovely smile 😊 can make the news!!

[@rickycoleman5727]

Truth. I was told by him years ago that he liked to see me mad. Didnt understand then but do now. Thanks

[@shannonmckenna5017]

I dont know why i cant bring myself to leave. Im broken. I feel sick. I watch these vids alllllll the time. It makes me sick...and here i am

[@louiserodmore7284]

Ditto - you’re not on your own 🥰

[@debbiefinley7827]

Small steps towards your goal... Start by distancing.

[@shannonmckenna5017]

@@debbiefinley7827 trying to..i distance. She notices. Love bomb. I feel guilty. Same ol song and dance

[@macmovieman1]

Truth. I am dealing with my mom in the courts now. You would not believe how bad it is.

[@A1Happy777]

Sadly it does seem that way whether it is a parent or boss, it is like they never grew up from the child games.

[@jackpetersen7545]

Heike,You look gorgeous 🌷🌹,Hope you are not with a narcissist!

[@danieljinkins3267]

Speaking from experiences I am so grateful for her education on these types.

[@cindysimpson7082]

Truth! I honestly could feel the energy that was being generated by my ex when I was being set up or provoked and him feeding off of it. I didn't understand what was going on at the time but now I do. I made the decision to go no contact which was the best thing I could do.

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

How are you doing now? Hope you're feeling well and getting your power back! 💪 This might help - slay.rebeccazung.com/

[@patriciahindman9721]

I love your demeanor! This issue is so difficult but you address it as if “ don’t make this such a big deal”. “ I am here to understand and I will give you skills to handle it”!! It is so hopeful as you present yourself. Thank you for the upbeat presentations!

[@craig3714]

Yes they do love provoking me Rebecca !

[@RebeccaZungEsq]

Ugh! Sending you strength!

[@blackbadger6749]

TRUTH... just realized a person I thought I knew well for years has NPD... oh my GOD!!!