Why This One Thing Is Destroying Men’s Lives (And No One’s Talking About It)

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

Prisons are full of inmates from deprived, dysfunctional backgrounds. Very few inmates are from comfortable, happy, middle-class backgrounds.

[@martinsaunders7925]

@@RobertTaylor-gz2fu cannot change what you don't own. What is to be changed is within you.

[@alswearengen6427]

And there are millions of successful, or at least non-criminals, who come from deprived, dysfunctional backgrounds.

[@OregonDARRYL]

And almost all violent prisoners were violated as kids...

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

@@alswearengen6427 Millions of non-criminals, yes. However, most people born & raised poor stay poor. Most never become successful.

[@RicktheRecorder]

Genetics. You must include those in the equations. You are your father's son.

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

Gaining self-esteem, confidence, success etc. is extremely difficult when you're deprived, disadvantaged, insulted, rejected etc. Millions of people can't do that on their own, nor have the help they need to do so.

[@Wreakmayhem]

Nailed it

[@martinsaunders7925]

@@RobertTaylor-gz2fu The responsibility does not lie with other people. What lies within draws them to you.

[@danielcobbins8861]

Ditto, I've been through to whole therapy racket, and it didn't solve a thing.

[@Jamhael1]

​@@martinsaunders7925 tell that to a child who YEARNS to be taught...

[@martinsaunders7925]

@@Jamhael1 I did,and will.

[@Mac1994]

As a flawed 55yo that was an only child whose dad walked out when I was three with a mom that had to dive into the full on work mode ... I totally understand the damage that can come from a broken home and what the lack of any roll model can have on a boy/man. Sadly, though, while we know the academic statistics to it all, life has taught me that in it all, no one really cares and we are in this thing alone. The past cannot be undone and when push comes to shove whatever family there is, whatever the so called church claims, etc. .... they really don't care nor have your back when its all said and done. At least, that's been my experience.

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

Yes, bad parents & a bad upbringing are a huge handicap.

[@bundyted-nw6eo]

Facts

[@wanderingwarrior5626]

Only if you let it be!

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

@@wanderingwarrior5626 How do you overcome it all & become successful, happy etc.?

[@stuarthammond2030]

Humans are inherently bad...

[@StarGazer568]

My dad dropped out of my life about the age of 10. I was fortunate enough to have a maternal grandfather and uncles to fill that void to some extent. I never learned how to deal with women and I floundered. I took each failed relationship and learned from my mistakes. I got better, but there were some less than stellar behaviors. I pray that I was able to give my sons and daughter a direction through life. Time will tell. Professionally, I also found my own way, but wonder how far I would have gotten if I had a dad who was there to inspire and motivate me through my teen years. I'll never know.

[@ChrisP-sc9sf]

Went zero contact 8 years ago. Thankful to be healing from toxic relationships. It’s a journey Im beginning to document. I’ve started with painting and writing haiku. I have found that learning to stay focused on the present moment has helped me in regulating my emotions. I’m far from perfect as my frustration spills out due to passion towards current events and civil rights issues. I am not embarrassed any longer with my diagnosis and see that it has built in me emotional maturity. Empathy and Compassion is replacing Fear and Mistrust. Thankful for your support and understanding and Love for your fellow human. Namaste 🙏🏼

[@martinsaunders7925]

@@ChrisP-sc9sf you're on the bus,or off the bus Ken Keysey. Either way,you're on YOUR path. The sword, Mightier than the pen. Sooner broken,sooner forgotten.

[@OregonDARRYL]

Building a life is like building a house. You need the tools and the materials. If you're missing ONE thing... you will fail. No nails? No house. No hammer? No house. No wires? No house. No foundation? ...not happening. You can have almost everything and still fail if you're missing that ONE thing. And almost all of us are missing several things to be successful. We are not taught to succeed. We are taught to work. So, we work, we fail, and we die unimaginably sad - because at some point - we want to.

[@Akcd11r2002]

This guy gets it.

[@IFYOUWANTITGOGETIT]

Exactly!! Well put.

[@Drift678]

You hit the nail right on the head! It's a lot work but the journey pays life long dividends and is worth it. Therapy was the best thing that I could have every done for myself to break the cycles and patterns that were inhibiting me. I'm still in process but much more aware, open, and honest with myself than every before. Keep up the good work.

[@djreb8505]

I AM IN TEARS LISTENING TO THIS. I’ve ended a 9 year relationship with my now 2nd ex-fiance after being in couples therapy for months and resolving issues I’ve battled with; not just the relationship itself but also what I’ve dealt with my family. I don’t have the best relationship with my mother (since 2018) and my dad (since 2020) and it trickled into my previous relationship with my ex to where it caused so much tension to where we grew apart. Too much detail to explain, but it’s currently a constant battle within myself that I’m fighting with. Just hearing this is a reminder of there’s hope. I know I’m rambling, but I needed to hear this.

[@sarahdawnmoore]

Thank you for this comment. It helps me to see them as much as it helps you to see the video.

[@stephensegal5187]

It can take more than several years to sort it all out, but the cool thing is Its possible to do. Just don't try to be in ANY Relationship UNTIL You got You sorted out.

[@randyeast2542]

Sarah: This is by far your best video ! Top Marks, I don't understand how our society finds this simple principle so difficult to grasp ! From someone who know what it's like, this really hits home...well done...Thank you !

[@Bad_company1339]

I had a collapse of my hero as you said, but I had a knowledge of the bible from a young age, and I learned how to replace my hero in a good way from King Hezekiah. His father was horrible, as was his grandfather. He looked back theough his bloodline and found King David and chose to immulate him. My hero replacement became the apostle Paul.

[@davidcolmer5448]

Paul was my favorite too.

[@rainer1980]

What's frustrating is that our mothers often teach us to treat women the way they wish our fathers treated our mothers. Then you try to do that not realizing that the way your mother was treated is a generation behind, and modern women aren't going to appreciate being treated with obsolete values from a bygone era. Then you resent your mothers for giving you outdated information about women that doesn't apply. Consequently, if you hold onto that resentment too long, you subconsciously develop misogyny towards women. The advice your father gives you on women could be outdated also, but he'll nominally at least warn you about the nature of women, while your mother will nearly always sugarcoat the truth about the way women are because she is projecting aspects of herself onto them; she thinks those women should treat their sons the way she treats his father. See the dichotomy of that duality?

[@vsalukir7019]

Here is your advice. Stop crying about it and treat women any way that you please. Always be yourself because trying to treat a woman the way that she wants to be treated is not worth the effort. They simply have nothing to give you that is worth you changing to suite them.

[@rainer1980]

@@vsalukir7019 "Most women set out to try to change a man, and when they have changed him they do not like him.' - Marlene Dietrich

[@coenvanwyk1]

So sorry to hear about your brother. I hope he finds a way out of thee tangle he finds himself in. And thank you once again for the loving, caring way you point out patterns and pitfalls in men's lives. I can attest to the truth of what you are saying, and I can only hope that I can provide what my grandsons need as they grow up.

[@jefft724]

It's a real paradox that if a man really needs a woman, she will be turned off to him.

[@christopherrobin361]

That's a big reason why I stopped heeding women that are so "needy." They are usually manipulative and selfish anyway. Karma in full, needy women deserve the callous indifference they receive.

[@chrisc1011]

I’ve watched thousands of videos on KZbin and I finally found the one that I understand and need the most..thank you very much for sharing this beautiful message.❤️

[@khalidsumrain-wp1kk]

You nailed down to the tee. This drama of break up the basic American family has been unfolding for sometime . As a tragic consequence men lost their touch with their masculinity, so women are I search of their feminine side by hoping between bars in search of the masculine men so they would feel safe and protected.

[@headfirst6227]

Nice job expanding on my own thoughts. Kudos to you. I spent some time early on looking for a surrogate father figure and found that to be a mistake. My mother was something of a psychopath and held me by the scruff my entire life. Terrible time with my overproductive sisters. Terrible time with my associates as well. Only recently have I found the resources to understand how my experiences shape my perceptions and me. About 10 years ago, I severed all connections with my previous life and purged myself of the negative influences. I still have trouble bonding emotionally but oh well.

[@themachine8009]

This one hit home. My ex.wife didn’t respect me.

[@ScubaNut22]

If it makes you feel better... I don't think many ex wives (or many current wives) respect their husbands.

[@vapeking466]

I'm sorry this happened. I did my prison time at just 18 for marijuana of all things. I was denied parole twice and discharged 2.5 yrs later. I have been a opiate addict also after my son's mother left me random out of the blue one day with no explanation. I have 10yrs clean now but I have never been lonelier now that mom and dad are gone. Best thing you can do is visit him often in prison and send him money. I think lots of prisons may have some counseling now. In 1990 church was the only thing we had and they came to us. It's a very tough time for men especially younger guys now that the majority of women put a career first and don't need a man anymore. I have done better with my son he is 19 and in college with his first girlfriend he is pretty much the opposite of what I was as a kid. I don't know that I have attachment issues. I made it 5 yrs in my relationship with my son's mother. I do believe I may have trauma issues however.🙏

[@pre-dawnraid9037]

That's tough man. God is the only healer.

[@nicktrierweiler3690]

The rebuilding process is not easy. But you have to do it regardless...

[@Tim_G_Bennett]

Yep, I'm six years in so far, it's been a slog for sure. Not sure where to go from here though, no one talks about the transition from full time healing to living again.

[@JedEkert]

​@@Tim_G_Bennettit is a concurrent path. You heal while you live, making fine tuning adjustments as necessary.

[@markothwriter]

This is why men need to avoid drugs and alcohol as soon as they become a father. Drugs and alcohol make you a lousy father. And it also does not work for the woman to try to be the father. My mother was the boss in my family. She decided everything. She told me what hobbies to do, what school activities to be in, what friends to have. She was extremely controlling. And my father was really hurt from being in Vietnam. He had a tough time coping with life. You do have to step out of the shadow of your childhood. It's tough.

[@backyardrailroader]

On the contrary, Sarah, I am aware of what happened in my childhood and what I went through. It is why I did and still do many things solo. I am constantly working to change that situation.

[@silverstreettalks343]

I am sorry to hear about your brother. I remember your mentioning him before. Thank you for this post. I can see in my own experience how the tensions between my parents (my father possibly had mixed ADHD combined with cyclothymia, and there was a period in my teen years when he was physically abusive to my mother) have shaped my life. I have had to do a lot of work on myself, and I think I will probably keep finding bits of barbed wire to pull out for the rest of my life. Work with a couple of psychologists plus a lot of reading and reflection have helped me a lot. I appreciate what you are doing.

[@shawnbennett4222]

My father left early. It has left me with choosing the aggregate of what I view from successful adult male figures throughout my life.

[@sharkbit76]

There's no question that my what happened in my childhood affected my adult life. That and ADHD hindered my career and romance choices. I've learned more in the last five years than the previous sixty years. I'm at peace with who I am now but I feel like it's too late make significant changes. I now take meds that allow me a nicer person

[@rogerallnut1577]

Nope. Approaching 60 now and I gave up trying to figure out what went wrong. I live within my means. Used to blame my parents for years, but I know they did all they knew. I blame myself for not advancing further in life, so, 30 years ago I threw myself into work. It's the only thing for me.

[@neuroplasticity7235]

Thanks Sarah I have been listening to your channel for a few years know and I know that you know what you're talking about. I am a 63-year-old male and wish i knew what you're teaching about 50 years ago. I've been learning about C-ptsd (Complex- post traumatic stress disorder) and its effects on a person's life. And the effects of emotional smothering from the mother or being a surrogate husband for the toxic relationship of the parents. I think the Citicom Everybody loves Raymond is a great example of how the son is confused from his childhood patterns (torn between his wife and mother and never knows why). Thanks to caring people like yourself we can understand the problem and can heal from our childhood wounds Thank you so verry Mutch

[@SpeCialeDDoC454]

Dude, my ex had the box set. Too many generations In a row act as though everybody loves Raymond is documentary. Good luck!

[@jackdeniston6150]

I think early 2 1/2 men is also accurate.

[@SpeCialeDDoC454]

Thanks for this. Prayers for your brother. 🙏

[@davidsisson2026]

My parents were not good at nurturing or understanding their children. Too make a long story short. A brother spent time in prison. 3 sisters were pregnant while in high school. My self esteem was shattered. Anyhow now at 67. I'm still working on myself. But you can't do it alone. We need other people. I'm thankful for my friends. I'm sure that not knowing or seeing real masculine love was detrimental to my mindset. I actually did well, but only by the Grace of God. I Appreciate all these videos. Were not available back in the day.

[@ronwallace1409]

It's difficult to overcome dysfunctional parents . Both parents are important. To find your own way is hard. The people you surround yourself with make a difference in life . However letting your walls down with a woman ,it's never worked for me ... Suppressing it has always worked. It's unfortunate truth.

[@jeffheesakkers6541]

My mom never gave me that emotional support but she did believe my sister when she told what her psychopathic husband did again but never me when my nephews did things to me in their narcissistic rage😢😢😢

[@auragraf]

Outstanding Sarah Dawn!... I'm 60 yrs old and it took me 40 years to discover what kind of man I want to be... The oldest of 7 raised by a single mother... The stories I could tell, I should be dead or in prison. Nothing serious just stupid stuff like running around with .22's in guitar cases like some kind of gangster. Anyways, my father was a slut... 5 different families... He used to say they were my brothers and sisters... Hell no! And I have 9 nephews in and out of Jail, no dads... Anyways Sarah this is the best video on this subject I've ever seen! Men, I would join Sarah if I were you! I ain't met a woman yet that hit the bullseye like this video... I'm a professional chef and an amazing guitar player that stayed away from family along time ago for my own good. Thank you Sarah! Sorry about your brother...

[@lookfeelbehealthy6320]

I definitely relate to the mom one. It describes me quite well. And she passed a few years ago.

[@ardidsonriente2223]

I took the third route: I'm not interested in my father's approval, or in proving him wrong (It is too evident how wrong he is, and how irrelevant is his opinion). So I do... nothing. My eternal struggle has been to find enough motivation to do anything with myself. Its just survival, all the time.

[@BradleyKieser]

You're a lovely person. The world is better with you in it.

[@roxorz007]

The lack of a secure base really causes the most damage, it goes for women too but it become much more visible when broken men are required to be leaders. Its really fucking hard when you have a garbage road map. Play therapy is something we broken men need to look into.

[@michaelmaultsby895]

“The Myth of Normal” by Gabor Mate is a very good book. The key is not the same for everyone. The various pains are like a gut intuition of a problem. Listen to her.

[@MrBill_oohya]

Girl speaks the honest truth Boys, listen to her words and recover your masculinity + happiness. You will love how good it feels 😅

[@Brent-z2s]

My cousin just got a 10year federal sentence and he was well educated like your brother he had a father but he was always working and never there so he could have the biggest house in the neighborhood.

[@kerryfoster1]

So lucky to have had a good father, but even so there were things I had to deal with that he never did. He worked in insurance all his life for the same company. I was made redundant 3 times (With wife, children, and mortgage) but I managed okay finding work. Did many different jobs but spent the last 25 working for myself. 2 pieces of advice. 1. things will get better.... 2. Do not be JUDGED by others - They have NO IDEA of your capabilities. Be the best at what you do and be proud of it!

[@mydogmarleyandme.4325]

I really appreciate your crusade on this issue. The only problem is..this talk should be given by a man and/or shown by one. Growing up a a boy without a positive father is hypocritical. You are expected to become a man but you are raised by a woman. You love your mother, but absolutely hate the situation. Not having a father hurts. It’s like being given a brand new car (stick) and being told to drive it in the 24 hour LeMas endurance race. It a scare you never really get over because you can’t replace time..but you can forgive those involved and be the best you can be and not repeat the cycle

[@OregonDARRYL]

So sorry about your brother, Sarah. Please accept a hug from me....

[@ntcarib]

Holy Shawinigans Sarah. That was deep. Took me to my knees. Thank you for making this

[@johncondon4647]

You are such a good sister, Sarah.

[@joshuahayward1525]

Good one Sarah, I wish I had known this early on. This is core stuff for men. I've been working on this probably my whole adult life, and I want to share to other men it is worth it! Only we ourselves can fill in that void left by early parental wounding. Blessings!

[@roberthollinger3184]

Big boys dont cry ! Taught to never show emotion's.

[@realdeal8078]

I love how you talk with such passion and purpose..!!

[@joeskeptical4762]

It's refreshing to hear a woman talk about how she wants men to be better. *It's a huge, gaping void in my life, women who encourage men to be men, and women who do the same.*

[@travelingadler]

Love it..Mirrors my own struggles.

[@ChrisAlford-i6e]

My only goal is self-actualization. "If it is to be it is up to me". That was my first full day in the Air Force.

[@itmightbepossible8586]

Yes I agree that childhood experiences/training/trauma have an extremely powerful and persistent effect on a persons life and behavior and ability to cope and/or thrive. And I agree it needs to be addressed. I have been working on it for the last 40 years or so. I've tried various religions, spiritual practices, health practices, years of therapy, I guess it all helps a little. But don't get impatient and expect fast changes. The changes are organic and tend not to follow a schedule or pre-set program. And there are often hundreds of unknown, subconscious, beliefs, behaviors, habits, reactions etc. which all need to be worked through one at a time, and often worked through several times before a change is permanent. So fine, be passionate about it, but don't get impatient. Curing a bad childhood tends to take a lifetime. I've seen this over and over with many people.

[@Bravo_7_6]

Thank you for the encouragement, Sarah. Looking forward to more in-depth videos on how to effectively resolve these issues.

[@BobfromAustin]

Best thing ever happened to me was getting away from bad, abusive father and mother picking a good, steady man the second time. Still took me until my 30s to really start figuring out my manhood and let go of the past and wrongs done.

[@claytoncampbell6873]

The sad thing is that no one in my life wants to hear my sadness. I wish I could go back to the time before I realized how much better the majority of the world is doing than I am and not feel like I’m not enough.

[@enenramedia8767]

Dax said it best in his track "To be a Man". Relevant to this, and many similar videos. The "generational curse".

[@stevevanleeuwen8815]

Thank You once again Sarah! After three HARD years of work, I have most of that sorted out. Lots of counselling, EMDR therapy, and hundreds of pages of journaling I think I am about halfway there. I'm now working hard on the DBT skills training manual by Marsha Lineham, like phase two for me. People like Dr. Gabor Matte and Bessel Vanderkolk have become great heroes to me in the process. Dr. John Gunderson also. Too bad some people around me won't do some work on themselves, but what can ya do?

[@TheVigilantEye77]

Families create adults

[@markpaladiy5748]

FYI, my dad never disappointed me. My mom much later did a couple times. But that's the only big negatives. And the negatives here were not formative.

[@JB-kx9bx]

It really annoys me that lack of worker rights and protections through unionization is never talked about. As if the times when men were valued had nothing to do with the collective bargaining power of unions.

[@Oslohiker]

It's not better for girls growing up without a father.

[@davidwalsh8612]

Maybe....but when it's all said and done, we all have the ability to make decisions to change things.

[@giohernandez524]

Thank you for listening to us … but the world really doesn’t give a s!?t about us … that’s the honest truth ….👍

[@michaelweaver6733]

You are I believe spot on with your assessment of the problem Sarah! Fatherless households are a real problem in this society, not only for boys and young men, but for girls and women as well! Yes, Men DO find their justification most often from their fathers and sometimes from other men. The problem? Fathers and men, as well as everyone are far and away imperfect, and so often boys can suffer emotional wounding from their fathers. The answer? …… Men need to seek the one and only true God, which is their Father in Heaven, who is revealed to us in the Lord Jesus Christ! Much all of what you have touched on here Sarah had been addressed in a book and men’s study by Pastor John Eldridge in I believe year 1999 or 2000, titled “Wild at Heart” I realize so many either do not want to hear this, or won’t take the time to search it out, but it does not make it not true. I pray that these words will find someone truly in need, and will start them on the path to healing and a new life! God Bless!🙏🏻

[@stephensegal5187]

You can turn this around on itself..... My whole thing has been to use my parents as an example of what NOT to do.

[@nightrider4370]

You are an amazing person,. Sara! You're beautiful inside and out! Thanks for this!

[@devilsadvocacy]

Some of your best work. More like this please

[@arquiJ]

Listening to these people brought us here, we have to stop giving attention to they. First and last comment.

[@colonelquack]

"Who am I supposed to be if I'm not supposed to be like him." Around 12, I fashioned my own role models. Spock, the Fonz, and Weird Al. These days, I try to be my own damned role model. Though. Worf's honour, Gandalf's wisdom and whimsicalness, and Aragorn's stoic confidence bleed through.

[@herbertvonsauerkrautunterh2513]

I have had none of the issues discussed here in my early family home life. Interesting to listen though and see what programs other people have and why.

[@johnmichaux616]

100% correct !

[@JDoomhauer87]

We are told “Be a man” but without any context at all of what that means.

[@christopherrobin361]

And no long term rewards and stability when we act like it. It's a ruse so men are manipulated for the Nth time others benefit.

[@eduardotamargo8615]

Ever Gratefull to you & your advice.

[@grahambriley2619]

Thank you for your candid, heartfelt, genuine take on this. You spoke so many truths that it covers almost everything. It is critically important for everyone to try to understand what's inside of us and why it is there. Is a very brave thing to do, and individual men HAVE TO try to solve the mystery, becuase we've got hormones too, and testosterone rage is a real thing. It is scary and empowering. Like any sort of power, we men are responsible for how each of us weilds it, and to control it, and each other. Is a lot, but I've found the best approach is to knowledge that my father may or may not have done the best he could. Doesn't matter, I've tried to become my own father. Wish I had the kind of dedication I'd have for my own children, if I had any. I went to therapy to break out of codependent cycles, but I remember the spells for self sacrifice. Doesn't seem to take when it is my own inner child though. He's on his own sometimes. Not perfect, but I've got a bead on the problem.

[@acerhillfarm4245]

The overwhelming majority of society and WOMEN do not give a eff about men’s struggles.

[@IanM-id8or]

I always had the opposite problem - way too much empathy. It made me easy for narcissists (like my evil sisters) to manipulate and abuse. I've managed over the decades to dial it back to something more reasonable. On the up side, I'm unlikely to ever end up in prison. On the downside, I find it next to impossible to defend myself. I am literally unable to even consider throwing a punch. My father was an abusive arsehole. I'm actually surprised that he didn't end up in prison. Likewise, I'm surprised my sister isn't in prison - she should be

[@richarddegener]

Again really good, You are hitting the spot the last couple of sessions . Kind regards.

[@lindemann06]

At the ripe old age of 76, I think I can safely say that "becoming a man" is a life-long proposition. The one piece of advice I would give is from Socrates: "The unexamined life is not worth living." Just as true at 76 as it was at 16.

[@jimstavrianoudakis7567]

Yep.....you have found your divine feminine....good on you!

[@bobhill9124]

A dysfunctional childhood or a fatherless home is the origin of so much disorder in our society. There is much blame on "toxic masculinity." I would argue if this is so, it is interrelated to "toxic feminism" that has confused the masculine role in society.

[@jamesadamteytunechi6448]

Small voice: who am I? The unfuckwithable Me: am the image of Gɔd 😎🔥.

[@martinsaunders7925]

@@jamesadamteytunechi6448 😄👍

[@karihamalainen9622]

Very many persons , man and women , stuck in to their bad habits.

[@zaynevanday142]

I call BS everyone has the choice to be either good or bad 🔥 🔥 🔥

[@JoeJ-8282]

Being a "good" or "bad" person, may have a lot to do with your personal choices and behaviors throughout your life, but (for example), just simply because you're a really good person and internal Spirit, that still doesn't really in any way guarantee that you will be truly successful in life, as your upbringing and other handicaps, and/or past traumas may still indeed hinder your current life, as much as you may try to get up, over, and above them... I know from personal experience, as I consider myself to be a really good, positive energy Spirit, always trying my best to do the right thing by myself and everyone, but my physical and mental limitations, along with some of my past still make my current existence extremely difficult (so far not even possible), for me to ever "get ahead" and be truly successful with my life!... "It is what it is" though, I guess. You just have to do the best you can from day to day, continually trying to improve yourself wherever and however you can, even though that effort may not ever actually get you where you truly want to be in life... but you gotta keep trying to be the very best version of yourself as you possibly can, and that's all that anyone can really ever do!... OR, of course one can go the total opposite way, down into the "darkside", and get themselves into serious trouble with alcohol, drugs, or the law, (or just simply being in a negative energy relationship with a soul sucking "partner"), but I choose NOT to do ANY of THAT stuff anyway, even though my life is far from what I dreamt it would be when I was younger, and not in a really "bad" way, but definitely not ideal either... I just do what I can from day to day that feels like the right thing to do, to either better my own life or someone else's around me, and I think that's as good as I can do!

[@Jamhael1]

If you live in hell, to do good is considered a crime...

[@markrunyon5524]

Very MACHO!

[@RobertSkene-qw3ob]

How's about constantly correcting you ,driving from the front seat without a wheel,and trying to give directions using Google Maps ending up in some forsaken desert with no dessert.. But after 52 years I still love 💕 her !!! ,🇨🇦😂

[@mr.magnetic8884]

True. Fathers are as essential in a housebound as mothers are. God and the Bible are very clear on marriage and becoming one flesh. But it is also a reality that most people are slowly drifting away from this and following more common and more toxic norms to traditional marriage and family. My father was almost never in my life. But I thank God everyday I found different masculine figures to learn and growt from in the Bible but also in fictional characters in books and video games.

[@shaneboyington713]

I believe that men just need to redefine themselves in modern times. We need to start putting ourselves first and prioritizing physical and mental fitness and stop trying to fit into an outdated unrealistic mold of having the large family and occurring debt that just brings struggle.

[@Jamhael1]

Women will claim that this is "toxic masculinity", and try to shut it down...

[@Detour-2002]

I never had any real relationship with my parents and been betrayed by them both been abused and abandoned by my mother and worse abuse by my father imagine that! Always at the crossroads better off on the lone winding road!! My only goal is to raise my son to be the version of himself.

[@bluegrasskid4835]

Absent fathers and pornography are probably the two greatest threats to boys/young men.

[@toshiojohnston3732]

All this is true but how much is this from bad parenting and trauma and how much is from denial about so much mixed feelings the truth can overcome many hardship but a little denial can destroy even the best of people.whats worse then the crime the coverup worse then that the denial of the coverup.

[@ghostbearr1]

I have had to be the adult since I was 12 years. My mother had a mental breakdown when I was 13 years old, she never truly recovered for it. My dad was still crying about his scout dog that in Vietnam that had to be put down. My first step father had PTSD from his as POW in Vietnam. My second step father was still the 10 year old boy who had his house burn when. My third step father was a self righteous Communist that whole hearted supported the Civil right movement in the 1970s, but because he of narrow mind set dehumanized everyone and he never understood what the civil rights movement was for and Communism actually was. He was a college professor. This mainly the reason why I walked away in 2000s, I had never seen a healthy relationship among adults and knew that I needed discipline. I nearly killed a friend over a bad your mom joke. I already had my right hand around his throat, had him off his feet, and slammed him into a support pillar of the house hard enough to shake the floor above us. This had less time then then chairs that knocked over to hit the ground, because that was what snapped me out of my rage. I set him down, apologies to him, and left to walk in a very cold Wisconsin winter night to calm down. Even though I do not what path you would consider me to be on. I do not that I would be on one of those paths as you define them. Please keep the good work Sarah and hopefully you can help your brother when he gets out.

[@MacN-gx3jv]

Thank you 🙏

[@jamesnelson3858]

A father's affirmation/praise/ acceptance/ blessing is a huge deal. My heart goes out to those who are fatherless. For the those who are fatherless wrestle with God until you recieve your blessing. Genesis 32. FYI " Israel becomes Jacobs new name and this means " Wrestles with God." Jacob was messed up because he never recieved affirmation from his father Issac) like Esau (Older twin brother) and Jacob would not let the stranger (God) until he was blessed. The stranger let Jacob win ultimately dislocating Jacob's hip. As father's we need to build up our boys to men with encouragement, praise, and affirmation. I know it hard but Your Heavenly Father will free you from the bondage of "My dad was just a donor" or even worse "my Dad wanted me aborted." This is a catastrophic burden that needs to be laid on the cross through forgiveness instead of harboring resentment and hatred.

[@anielyantra1]

This was depressing for me. It did confirm why my life's trajectory is what it is. I feel like a ceramic plate that was glued together by glues that didn't hold. Thanks....I think?.......

[@prestonshort6324]

👍🏻 well done

[@SpiritsOfAnotherDay]

I feel the opposite about this - in deep emotional favoritism toward Females wheat-her relationships with their Mother or Father … and gives her a free pass to her own emotions.

[@NA-ju4vq]

Same. My life is now ruined. 6 figures, sys engineer. Struggling. They don't care. Been following for years. You do good work but I should be gone multiple times over.

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

The worst people tend to have the most kids.

[@JoeJ-8282]

Unfortunately I've noticed that tendency among people in this modern society also, which isn't a good thing, but what can we really do about it? Nothing really. :(

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

@@JoeJ-8282 Contraception, but they refuse to use it.

[@JoeJ-8282]

@@RobertTaylor-gz2fu Yeah, just my point. No-one can FORCE anyone to HAVE to use it. (Unfortunately in this case)

[@RobertTaylor-gz2fu]

@@JoeJ-8282 The Chinese gov did for a few decades, but I can't imagine such a policy being implemented in the West.

[@JedEkert]

​@@RobertTaylor-gz2fu If our nation maintains its current course, you won't have to imagine.

[@mathius_dragoon532]

Even if you assume my past is relevant, that still doesn't explain why women I've never met treat me like garbage when I try to be anything more than an NPC to them.

[@TurboWulfe]

Keep on keeping on 😎🤘🍻

[@Jamhael1]

If the issue are the parents, then GO BLAME THE PARENTS! STOP BLAMING THE MEN NOW!

[@khriswildt5633]

From what I can tell the one thing ruining men is women!

[@F.udemin]

This is a good empathetic messege. Gentlemen, this woman is speaking real shit. It might sound like woo-woo nonsense, but what Sarah says here is proven fact. We are human beings and, despite individual differences, we all share similar biological machinery. You are not immunue to the predictable outcomes of a dysregulated nervous system. Your tauma will lead to your demise. Alcohol, narcotics, and porn only push your last day forward. Take your healing journey seriously, our lives depends on it.