Will I Eventually Be Able to Drink Normally? (if I address the underlying cause of my addiction)

[@angelsone111]

I 100% stand in agreement. I discovered it’s comparable to what you described as going back to a toxic relationship after some time had passed away from them. Euphoric recall is there for addiction to a toxic partner or alcohol. I wrestled with both trying to make both relationship with alcohol and the toxic partner work. Both are a mental obsession with adverse emotional, physical and spiritual consequences. I finally released both addictions four and a half years ago and focussed on healing the deep emotional wounds that made me vulnerable to addiction to narcissistic individuals and wine for soothing and relief. Poison isn’t relief. It isn’t healthy connection nor does it lead to anything healthy. I developed a healthy relationship with myself outside of anyone or anything using everything I learned. Now the thought of alcohol is aversive. Life without alcohol is superior to life with it. Life alone is superior to life with an abusive unavailable person. Alcohol is the most addictive socially acceptable drug wreaking havoc in society and relationships!

[@TeaRose9]

The toxic relationship analogy is absolutely brilliant. 💯🎯

[@goodwilltriumph2842]

I'm just starting to watch the video. My experience is that an alcoholic only has one effective option. 100% sobriety all the time. My ex-partner manages to 'drink normally' for a short period of time. It ALWAYS spirals down out of control eventually. Now I'm keen to hear what Amber says!

[@michelledeklerk6352]

Your channel is the most helpful channel to find greater perspective and understanding that I have come across. I love the brutal and sometimes ugly truth because you show the ugly truths we do not always want to hear or see but oh so necessary. Thank you for sharing your knowledge in such an understanding and easy transparent way. You really are shedding light on the situation, create greater perspective that helps with creating more self love in this situation and to be aware and alert of any harmful habits or experiences while trying the best support loved ones struggling but not at the cost of myself as an empath. Greatly appreciate your channel and brutal but very necessary honesty when it comes to the complicate nature of addiction and struggles related to it to the addict and loved ones on both sides. Super helpful and great insights that can make a massive difference if we choose to learn from others with more knowledge and wisdom on any subject manner and in this case addiction. As the loved one if never dealt with addiction or experience in drugs it is very hard to truly understand and have the right outlook to make a positive change in whichever direction required and your channel and posts does exactly that if one is open to understand and not merely respond. Unwarranted advice and pulling back on unwarranted advice or opinions as it can only create more shame and therefore harmful or toxic repercussions. There is of course always exceptions to the rule but the rule is the statistical highest probability and necessary to have the full picture as the supporter cause trust me , chances the healthy person will be pulled down rather than pulling the addict up. Motivation is internal and cannot come from anyone outside of the individual going through the struggle. Your channel is expiring and makes me want to strive to improve mental health amongst all, rich and poor and just puts the fire underneath me to make it happen asap. Thanks for what you are doing to create awareness and persoective around this very complicated, deep routed, spiritual issue where the solution to the problem becomes set as the normal return. Quitting anything is like ciggies. Take one drag, over time you will escalate in buying a packet and escalating behaviour to fill the void that is being self medicated. The reality is its more than just a habit too, its all about the brain chemistry changing that is without your control. And it gradually creep up and just get worse and worse. All drugs and smoking are just a crux at the end of the day and out of experience I can say with utmost confidence that once sober, you have never felt better and we do not need any substances to help us cope with the stressors of life even though dogmated into believing we need external forces to be truly happy and living a fulfilling life Thanks again for the great content & making a difference

[@PutTheShovelDown]

Wow! Thank you so much for all these kind words. I'll be smiling all day 💖💖💖💖💖😀😀😀😀

[@jenb9274]

Thank you so much for always sharing your wisdom. Alcohol killed my son 18 months ago. Your videos help me understand this horrible dis-ease

[@teresagreen1484]

I'm sorry and I understand your pain it took my daughter 3 yrs ago.. all drugs are bad in my personal opinion alcohol is the worst and it is legal , easy for someone with an addiction to walk in a store or restaurant to buy .

[@PutTheShovelDown]

Sending you love and prayers, Jen. 💖💖

[@tatianajimenez6742]

I can’t express how much your videos have helped me ! Thank you so much for your work ! May God bless you ✨✨✨

[@PutTheShovelDown]

Awww thanks for your kind words of support! 💖💖You've put a big smile on my face, and your comment will help send signals to KZbin to show these videos to more people who need them. Together we can spread recovery faster than addiction is spreading!

[@tatianajimenez6742]

@@PutTheShovelDown🙏🏻🤍👏🏻 agreed ! And thankfully my partner is currently in recovery mode 🙌🏻 💪🏼❤️‍🩹

[@goodwilltriumph2842]

Four mins into the video and Amber is saying from all her years of experience exactly what I have experienced with my ex-partner. He sooooo much wants to be able to have that drink with dinner or at a social event. But when he starts to go down that track it ALWAYS after a short period of time spirals down to uncontrolled amounts of alcohol being consumed.

[@PutTheShovelDown]

Unfortunately, that's what usually happens. It takes a long time to learn that lesson. But, once people accept it, things become much easier. 💯

[@ArrozConMango-305]

My dad was a heavy drinker. He stopped drinking when my mom was pregnant with me. When my younger sister moved out of their house 25 years later, he started drinking whiskey in the evenings. He drinks maybe 3-5 shots every night, listening to music. When I visit, he doesn’t drink. I told him he can, but he won’t, which is cool. To me, he has supernatural powers. I will never touch alcohol again. Rolling the dice while knowing where it took me before, no way!

[@PutTheShovelDown]

Smart choice, Arroz!

[@smiley754]

THIS VIDEO. I am SO glad you addressed this! I have had this question myself and you had so many fantastic examples of why this typically doesn’t work- without putting the blame on the person. It is simply BIOLOGY (etc) like you said. Thank you so much for this video- it will play on REPEAT for me for awhile- it’s a CLASSIC already.

[@PutTheShovelDown]

So glad you liked it! 😀😀Thanks for taking time to leave this nice comment. Not only does it make my day..It also sends a signal to KZbin to show the video to more people!

[@RimGardensHomestead]

Thank you! Please keep making videos! So helpful🥰

[@PutTheShovelDown]

Thank you! Will do!

[@Wheninbloom]

As a recovering person who has tried to moderate - it starts out okay and then everything starts back up again!

[@PutTheShovelDown]

💯💯💯💯

[@gracielasaenz2128]

I love you Amber 🥰 Thank you 🙏 for doing this for all us ❤

[@PutTheShovelDown]

My pleasure, Gracie!

[@azadeh5233]

Thanks Amber! ❤ Could you possibly make a video on when the alcoholic leaves his/her spouse? What’s their thinking? I mostly seen information about the opposite when people leave their alcoholic spouse.

[@lesliecarlson9984]

Just a thought on that My son s alcoholic wife left when my son got serious about her unacceptable behaviour and starting calling the police She would beat on him and give him black eyes He never retaliated 6 ft 4 gentle giant When she realized he was serious she got her own apartment Obviously so she can do as she pleases without watchful eyes It’s very sad as they have a 4 years old child (unintentionally) But the child has become what the struggle is now It’s very sad The sick person has to realize that their own actions are causing the problems

[@PutTheShovelDown]

Take a look at this video. It's called "Why do addicts/alcoholics push you away" kzbin.infoJ5oicszytL4?feature=share

[@ConstantCompanion]

Part of it might have to do with you consider casual drinking. My guess is, someone who's had a problem with alcohol and doesn't want to give up drinking? Would consider casual two or three times a week? My personal idea of casual drinking is about a glass wine with dinner every 6 months or so. With food and water.

[@tatianajimenez6742]

My partner tried that many times and it always leads back to addiction

[@loribarbe5390]

Off topic. I love your hair!

[@PutTheShovelDown]

Awwww, thanks 😀

[@teresagreen1484]

I will say No to it all

[@PutTheShovelDown]

💯💯💪🏻💪🏻

[@leakubovic9779]

You look stunning! Thank you! ❤

[@PutTheShovelDown]

Awww thanks. 😊

[@jeanh.826]

My alcoholic daughter is threatening to relapse if she is not invited to her grandmother's for Christmas. Her grand mother called me and was worried about her coming because of a deep seated conflict with my grand daughter and my oldest daughter who raised my grand daughter since she was 2 years old. My AD has been drinking and using for 30 years. Her 20 year old daughter wants nothing to do with her because of her relapses over the last several years. How do I tell my daughter she is not going to be invited and how do I handle the situation. Thanks, for what you do. Your videos have done so much to help me.

[@miketucker2817]

What about Naltrexone or semiglutides managing drinking? Have you seen those work? My qualifier fails every time she tries to moderate.

[@renee8030]

Naltrexone can help someone decrease the amount and even quit drinking. The "qualifier" still has to want to decrease or stop drinking.

[@Fiery154]

Yeah, Naltrexone works somewhat, but they have to AcTuALLy be trying. My hub did it in 2019 and he reduced from 14 drinks per night to 8, which still doesn’t really qualify as “quitting.” He’s on it again now after 3 weeks of inpatient rehab and currently in a daily therapy program. He’s getting hammered about every 3rd day. Naltrexone is a tool, but it isn’t magic.

[@lesliecarlson9984]

In my experience the naltrexone stops the withdrawal symptoms for the most part also

[@renee8030]

@lesliecarlson9984 is this your personal experience? Clinically, it really shouldn't do anything for alcohol withdrawal symptoms(also my son's experience) and can precipitate opiate withdrawal.

[@renee8030]

@Fiery154 absolutely agree!! My son also used it(in injectable form, Vivitrol) and still drank about ever 3rd week for 3-7days(until his next shot) they were given every 28 days by day 21 he drank...

[@jasmineb1211]

You look so good, Amber!

[@PutTheShovelDown]

Awwww thanks, 😀 Jasmine

[@RimGardensHomestead]

I had some wine tonight, and I regret it, poured the rest down the sink! I can’t be friends with my enemy!

[@PutTheShovelDown]

💯💯💯💯Good for you! No friend zone 😀💪🏻

[@nxcheezhed]

No

[@lucineusch5484]

Nope. You can't drink moderately after being a heavy drinker.. If you were able to drink moderately you would have done it when you were drinking priorly...but no you drink heavy.

[@PutTheShovelDown]

💯