Worst Invasion in the Bible

This is my most extensive single animation to date. It was a TON of work, so I hope it was worth it and that you thoroughly enjoy it. If you do, please help me by liking and sharing it so that my work is not in vain and I’ll be more likely to do more stuff like this in the future (and if you’d really like to help, please consider becoming a supporter via patreon, KZbin membership, or subscribestar). Thanks!
A huge thank you to my good friends who lent me their voices for this animation. They’re all excellent intelligent people. These are their channels:
Meridian Frost
/ meridianfrost
TJ of the Goddamn Podcast
/ goddamnpodcast
Grappling Ignorance
/ grapplingignorance
Techvania
/ jackvania
Also, MrsDarkMatter2525, but she doesn’t make videos.
If you'd like to support my channel, and get access to perks, these are the best ways:
Patreon:
/ darkmatter2525
Subscribestar:
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KZbin Membership:
/ @darkmatter2525
Playlists of DarkMatter2525 Videos:
Courtroom Dramas:
• Corona Copeland
Power Corrupts:
• Power Corrupts (Part 1)
Bible Cartoons:
• If Man Obeyed God
Atheistic Animations:
• The Greater Insult
God & Jeffery:
• How God Invented Sex
Non-cartoons:
• Is God Actually The Vi...
Political Cartoons:
• FragerU - The Left VS ...
My Misc Videos:
• Voice Recording 001.WAV

[@DarkMatter2525]

Hope you liked the twist ending!

[@V_2077]

Thank you 💕

[@ernestschroeder9762]

Dark matter what more can I say, except it's good to see you back again and happy new year.

[@kai_plays_khomus]

Thank you for another amazing video - I love your approach! But I have one point of criticism: Yahweh's sword is extremly anachronistic although we all know that he can't look into the future, as he himself made abundantly clear in his scripture. If one doesn't care about the details people could think the story was unbelievable.. Have great holidays and a happy new year - greetings from Berlin!

[@Dominucastro47]

This is tooo meta fam lol. 🥺

[@derreckwalls7508]

To which twisted ending do you refer? 'The inertial hurricane or the erotically morphed shoes? Not that we really need to choose.

[@TheRealGuywithoutaMustache]

When someone says "everyday we stray further away from god" maybe it's a good thing after all

[@alimidoriya4679]

Totally bro

[@the.dandy.man2]

how are you everywhere?

[@P-P-Panda]

YEAH

[@bigbonedones7162]

Are you God? Are you Omnipresent?

[@archapmangcmg]

When you realise the WBC are some of the most Biblical Christians today, yes. It is great.

[@derreckwalls7508]

"It's their culture that dictates how God behaves, and not the other way around... interesting, very interesting." Now you're getting into a true scholastic perspective of religion!

[@JamesDavy2009]

In other words: we made God in our image, not the other way around.

[@paulcoy9060]

That's why the Greek gods were always fucking.

[@nannettefreeman7331]

He's hinted of it in the past, but I agree, the wording of the dialogue here is a step up!

[@AD-pp2vn]

@@paulcoy9060 Thats not exactly the case. The actual gods worshiped by the Greek pagans were very different from the gods mentioned in the myths. The myths were written by poets and authors as entertainment for the masses, they were very different from what the religious Greeks truly believed in. The cults of the Greek Pantheon typically forbade outsiders from recording their practices and beliefs so we have little to no idea on how the Greek Pagans gods were actually viewed. The only thing we know is that they viewed the Gods as fundamentally righteous.

[@derreckwalls7508]

@Herb Find Please explain how you made the leap from a force that holds atoms together to a conscious intelligence. If you're so scientifically minded I would surely like to know the logical process that leads you to that "conclusion". Not even Alfred North Whitehead was willing to make that bold a leap.

[@SaltpeterTaffy]

7:58 No witty banter from Jeffrey necessary, no pointing out of contradictions, God's comic villain laugh tells the entire joke. I love it.

[@JamesDavy2009]

As Jimmy Rees would put it, "No, Jeffrey!" or, "Jeffrey, Jeffrey, Jeffrey!" kzbin.info/www/bejne/a4K6gJZjoaiWaZI

[@PittsburghSonido]

I laughed just as hard as god did when I heard “dick slippers”

[@bakery3471]

not to mention the track sounds like hotline miami, which kinda emphasizes the absolute psychopathy of the situation

[@urigluck1248]

Here in Israel we learn about these horrible stories in school, but the teachers don't want to tell 9 years old kids that Rahab was a prostitude (the only inappropriate part in the story) so they say she was a "food seller" because food and prostitude happen to sound similar in hebrew

[@sharkquisha3407]

Yet you repeated it again in 1948 and did the same thing in this video.

[@1100100il]

Food seller? When I was an elementary school student we were told she was a hostess of some inn

[@jasondean88888]

If you don't like what God said in the Bible, and you're unsure of teaching it to your children...just lie about. Right? That's the obvious solution to any personal objection a person may have to the Perfect True Word.

[@bozomori2287]

​@@sharkquisha3407they guys they are fighting are no better 😂

[@nowthatsjustducky]

You mean the wholesale slaughter of everyone, including the infants was not inappropriate?

[@jmc655]

I brought this story up to my mom one time and she just said things were different back then. Religious people don't care they just know believing in god makes them feel special.

[@hotshotjcb3798]

Ask her if it was okay to kill nations, innocent children and family members for nothing they themselves did at that time?

[@Bezaliel13]

@Shawn Dominique Despite God being "objective morality."

[@whitetiger2515]

My mom thinks that since God is omnipotent that it means he can break physics whenever the fuck he wants. I wanted to bash my head against a wall when she said that.

[@Bezaliel13]

@@whitetiger2515 "God doesn't need to perform miracles" my ass!

[@martiddy]

Then why does your mom even bother to follow that religion knowing that she cannot apply the same principles in today's society?. Wasn't God's morality supposed to be objective and eternal?

[@CurryMuncher2]

"so who the hell is writing this account in the bible!", its almost as if they made it up

[@2fast2block]

Shut up, dolt. How did you get around the first verses of the bible with God creating and giving life? Real science says nothing does nothing. Real science says if there was something there already it must fit with the evidence of what we know. We know the 1LT says there's a conservation of energy. It can change forms and neither can be created or destroyed. Creation cannot happen by natural means. The 2LT has various aspects, one being the universe is winding down, entropy. Usable energy is becoming less usable, so at one point usable energy was at its max. This all points to a supernatural creation, by a supernatural creator at a certain point in which matter, space, and time were created. When I read how it can happen otherwise, ALL the fools resort to science-fiction. Once a supernatural creation is accepted, then the next step is finding proof of what supernatural power did it. We KNOW these laws. We have NO doubts about them. We also KNOW that the laws of nature can't come about without a Lawgiver, God. So if you want to pretend to be smart, please give me the laugh by giving your science how creation really happened by natural means. Also, throw in how we got the laws of nature, naturally. Life only comes from life. Law of biogenesis. God is the reason for us and all we have. kzbin.info/www/bejne/gJqwoq2ElL6Gjrc The odds are NOT there. kzbin.info/www/bejne/jWLCfHiMlqisl6M kzbin.info/www/bejne/r4icmJStr79_qc0 kzbin.info/www/bejne/mpXEooarqdlol9k

[@5kr3aminMunk33]

Blasphemy, get stoned pagan

[@ihaventshoweredin6weeksbut527]

@@5kr3aminMunk33 stoned for what?

[@PanosPitsi]

@@5kr3aminMunk33 my girlfriend and I are pagan fascists and this is offensive to us

[@AdmiralBison]

And/or justifying an atrocity.

[@tomsenior7405]

Wonderful. Christmas is complete. A beautiful Gift from Dark Matter.

[@existencemystery]

🎉 early morning, a toast, from the grail, our sacred cave, full of magic and treasure, wonders and ale 🍺 🥬🖍Lightning around

[@Amanoob105]

"God, if you wanted those people dead then why the hell did you create them in the first place?" Clearly Jeffrey has never played any of the Sim games.

[@peacevalue982]

Lol

[@tomdebevoise]

In the Quran, Allah creates many, many humans who are destined for hell, The Quran Verse (4:56) also says that in hell your skin is regrown so that you will suffer excruciating pain each time it is burned. In the latter, many Muslims claim this shows how scientifically advanced the Quran is, describing things scientifically centuries before they were discovered .

[@Equinox2149]

@@tomdebevoise cool story bro

[@VenusFeuerFalle]

@@tomdebevoise doesn't really make it better ya know

[@tomdebevoise]

@@VenusFeuerFalle It is all ridiculous drivel

[@UndisclosedTalent]

This is a masterpiece. I remember as a Christian, reading this story and being outraged at how barbaric God was... this contributed heavily to my decision I didn't want to serve or be like that devil deity

[@SatanasExMachina]

Please don't slander the Devil by calling YHWH by that name. Remember, the Devil doesn't agree with or like GAWD either.

[@UndisclosedTalent]

@@SatanasExMachina who is the devil? No such character in the OT.... made up in the NT to align Christianity with Greek mythologies Hades and polytheism... id be interested to hear how more though....

[@Canido19]

@@UndisclosedTalent Technically, there is an angel in Yahweh's service with the title of "Satan" (read: opposer; as in, debate opponent) in the book of Job. But that character is only assumed to be the fallen one referred to as "The Devil". In context, they're much more likely to be different characters. And that's assuming "The Devil" even IS a character, since references within the Bible to such an entity is sparse, if at all legitimately extant.

[@zaharabliss106]

@@UndisclosedTalent That fact would kind of be hilarious since hades isn't really a evil dude just essentially overseer of the dead but still I think they kind of had to make god a nemisis to hate or else maybe they'd see the holes in this foolishness.

[@UndisclosedTalent]

@@Canido19 yes exactly... only Job mentions Satan, or the opposer, and that seemed a character ordained to challenge God not an enemy of God... it certainly seems a stretch to compare that to gods nemesis of the NT...

[@geardog24]

"One person murdering is wrong, but an entire nation murdering is just war." History in a nutshell "If you want to do something that's wrong, just get everyone else to do it too." Most religions in a nutshell

[@flockinify]

It's not a crime if there are too many people to arrest.

[@UndisclosedTalent]

.... religions AND Nation States....

[@markfindlay8636]

When the government says so it seems to be acceptable.

[@mrmaat]

killing people outside of your tribe is war, killing people inside of your tribe is murder

[@InfernosReaper]

The difference between a killer and a hero all comes to whether or not society accepts the action

[@beeinthehive]

Forty years of wandering faithfully and total obedience, then god kills him for it. Ah, god's unconditional love.

[@Trainlover1995]

It’s because he killed a bunch of people when they made the Golden Calf.

[@beeinthehive]

@@Trainlover1995 You're blind guess is not supported by the bible. Does Mosses not say God ordered it? That was quite a delayed reaction too -lol. God also cares more about a calf being worshipped than murdering babies and all the little boys who were old enough to pick up a sword and r@ping the girl children. He either ordered it, allowed misinformation to be in the bible, and/or sat back and let it happen. What's your blind guess this time?

[@GhostOrochi]

I think you forgot the part in the Bible where God tells him to talk to a rock so it can give the complaining isrealites water. Instead Moses in anger smacked the rock with his stick, he didn't go into the promise land simply because God was trying to do a dick move but simply because he disobeyed, but at least Moses wasn't alone in the department a whole generation of people had to die out before they enter the promise land due to disobedience.

[@daymanfighterofthenightman]

Hey comrade :)

[@saiyanc137]

@@GhostOrochi If I were Moses I wouldn’t talk to the rock either. The last thing I need is my tribe of desert bandits thinking I’ve gone even more insane.

[@pcl2365]

“God? Why are you sooo obsessed with penis tips?” Died laughing. Great stuff DM

[@CrimsonHelldrake]

R.I.P.

[@bluecoin3771]

It was the days before gift cards 💳 were invented.

[@derreckwalls7508]

I LOVE the longer version stories! It's nice to sit back and relax as the absurdity builds, but with just the right amount of comic relief. And the detailed backgrounds work _perfectly_ to emphasize the minimalism of the cartoon drama. It has been a "most excellent adventure" following the progress of your work. You are an artist in more ways than one.

[@Starkillr1]

You’re exactly like your mother you love, absurd things the more absurd the better because you hate being grounded in reality that’s why you hate God and God is reality.

[@derreckwalls7508]

@@Starkillr1 Thanks for the cliché reply, but I don't hate your God anymore than I hate Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny simply because I don't believe in them. (That's the cliché reply to your cliché reply.) Where did you get your degree in psychoanalysis? Because it's only theists who think that's the reason people are atheists, and not a single registered psychiatrist would agree with you. You are so far off the mark that it's hardly worth trying to correct you, so I'll tell you this: I was once a very devout and sincere Christian who could testify to the influence God had in my life. I even decided to study the Bible in college. When I began to have doubts about my faith I thought understanding God's Word better would help strengthen it. But the more I learned about both the scholastics and theology, and the more I read the great Chriatian philosophers, the more questions and doubts I had. I can't tell you how often I sat at my study desk in tears begging God to strengthen me, to remove my doubt and not let me lose my beloved faith. I did not chose to stop believing, I simply no longer could. I struggled trying to answer my doubts for 8yrs, and admitting to myself that I could no longer believe was the hardest, most traumatic thing I have ever had to do in my life. So please, don't vent all that indoctrinated animosity at people who have had experiences that few if any theists can understand. I used to do the same thing, belittling people who I was taught to believe were evil and simpleminded, and now I greatly regret having done something so insensitive. At one point I thought it would have been impossibly to lose my faith, but it happened entirely against my will. I'm sure you are just as certain about your faith as I was, and I sincerely hope you don't have to go through the anguish of finding that you can no longer believe. P.S. I have only one question for theists, regardless of their religion, about why they believe in their gods and not any of the others. If you're interested I'll post it, because if you can answer it I will have no choice but to believe in your god.

[@Max_Doubt]

"Abortion for convenience is absolutely immoral. But if that abortion is performed by God's command with a dirty sword - and much to the detriment of the woman - that's a different situation[al ethics]." That's Xian moral priorities for ya.

[@saytax]

I think you'd have a hard time finding any Christian espouse infanticide. Unless they are the "progressive" California type of Christian. Besides, this is old testament. Christians just observe the new testament basically

[@aralornwolf3140]

@@saytax , They don't... they pick and choose what they want from the OT and ignore the parts that tell them to ignore the entire book...

[@saytax]

@@aralornwolf3140 Eh, it gives them purpose, I guess. I'm just glad they pick the passive Jesus, as opposed to the messiah's before him.

[@saytax]

@Christa Simon Like the WBC, some street preachers purposely say shit in hopes of getting hit in order to press charges and file a lawsuit.

[@saytax]

But seriously, wouldn't abortion out of convenience be objectively immoral? As opposed to the original argument was "safe, rare and for the mother's health."

[@Trainfan1055Janathan]

I still can't convince my Christian parents that there was no time the sun stood still, even though it defies the laws of physics. My mother says she did a paper on it in school and found evidence of it, but never says what the evidence was.

[@sniperwolf50]

I think that's a Christian modern myth that made the rounds a few decades ago. I vaguely remember, when I was a child, my father telling me something about scientists realising that there was one day missing in the calendar or something. The details are foggy

[@mutalix]

😅😅😅 Please tell me your joking or at least exaggerating a lil bit.

[@nordicexile7378]

@@sniperwolf50 Yeah, I remember my grandmother telling me about that. Supposedly NASA scientists trying to calculate the positions of the stars or something and found them to be "off" by an amount of time that was the sum of this and a couple of other biblical verses. Too bad I don't remember the details; it was about 50 years ago now.

[@tracer740]

Religious 'believers' pathologically accept or create that which they want to believe ... and subsequently disregard that which interferes with their resultant ant 'beliefs'.

[@camelopardalis84]

@everybody in this thread As a child (in about 1996) I heard that the whole (Christian) calendar could be about a hundred years (or even a more?) off because there's like a 100+ years gap in historiography in I think the Middle Ages. I have heard and read enough about all kinds of historical events and such to be quite sure that this isn't possible, but maybe those events I read about were backdated incorrectly. It would be a weird thing.

[@JorgeTorres-ek5qs]

"Everyone is basically a cloud of red mist now... And now the Earth is a baren lifeless rock!" Thus, Mars was created.

[@sundayoliver3147]

Well, Mars is the god of war--- and Yahweh was originally the god of war in the Canaanite pantheon of about 80 gods-- so that's appropriate. Can't help wondering if some of the impetus to wipe out Canaanites was so no one would protest making their war god into the One God.

[@Kingpug199]

⁠@@sundayoliver3147Yahweh was actually the storm god

[@LisaAnn777]

​@@Kingpug199and metallurgy and war.

[@aarongrooves]

OMG OMG OMG! So excited for another old-school bible story animation. This is the greatest Christmas gift I could have asked for 😭

[@loturzelrestaurant]

I fear the Quality of 'The Greater Insult' won't be replicated soon...

[@Potna_n3m]

Hello Aaron Grooves, famous youtuber who composes music for other famous youtuber Alan Becker to use in his animations

[@loturzelrestaurant]

@@Potna_n3m Was youre comment diected at me? If so, thx.

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

Note that Friendly Atheist continues reading Leviticus to us, and it tells a lot more about god's appetite than his followers want us to know...

[@TheAGNOSTIC_who_YT_CENSORS]

@@loturzelrestaurant I would have thought the comment was directed at @AaronGrooves...

[@Colorlightt]

Gotta love that not only did they all suffer because of one guy, but God also never even let them know that they were going into battle with out him.

[@MilkieMouse]

Sounds familiar!

[@mnm8818]

Classic god, also I always wonder why god mixes it up all the time (His spells). One day it's Ring around a rosey to destroy the walls the next it's ice, the other time its floods, angel of death, generic angels, plagues, sometimes it's a staff that needs to be held up, sometimes nothing. It's like a movie would be boring if the same trick is used over and over in the next scene. Need to capture the audience attention. Spice it up always. If I was god I'd just use angels to murder everyone I want all the times, why need to use different spells, maybe angels have a union group disallows repeat use cause of phycological effects...

[@InfernosReaper]

@@mnm8818 Matt Damon is why.

[@K162KingPin]

Joshua talking to his inner counsel... "so uhh, i told everybody we couldn't lose and we lost, what do we do" One of his advisors... "do what we always do, say GOD was mad about something and find a scapegoat to blame everything on" Joshua..."so blame the men that died?" Other advisor... "no thats to obvious, remember GOD is mysterious, we need to blame someone who wasn't even there" Joshua... "oh I see, but what about the men that died? wouldn't that make them innocent?" Yet another advisor "just don't bring it up, people will be so mad over the traitor we hand them they wont care"

[@the_kingslayer]

That's what trump did on jan 6

[@brimestonelewis8775]

Idea for an episode: God finally get tired of Jeffery and replaces him with a yes-man. Jeffery is sent to hell to become Lucy's assistant. Except Lucy actually listens to his advice, making Hell a better afterlife.

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

DarkMatter2525's "Power Corrupts" series covers the history of Jeffrey and Yahweh, and runs 19 episodes (in a playlist), but your idea would fit in, maybe a Jeffrey dream? :)

[@boxhunter9742]

Good Idea!

[@amf8648]

God gets jelous and brings him back xD

[@NomadicPariah]

Fucking Ace idea!

[@2fast2block]

I have an idea too, try thinking rather than being a dolt. How did you get around the first verses of the bible with God creating and giving life? Real science says nothing does nothing. Real science says if there was something there already it must fit with the evidence of what we know. We know the 1LT says there's a conservation of energy. It can change forms and neither can be created or destroyed. Creation cannot happen by natural means. The 2LT has various aspects, one being the universe is winding down, entropy. Usable energy is becoming less usable, so at one point usable energy was at its max. This all points to a supernatural creation, by a supernatural creator at a certain point in which matter, space, and time were created. When I read how it can happen otherwise, ALL the fools resort to science-fiction. Once a supernatural creation is accepted, then the next step is finding proof of what supernatural power did it. We KNOW these laws. We have NO doubts about them. We also KNOW that the laws of nature can't come about without a Lawgiver, God. So if you want to pretend to be smart, please give me the laugh by giving your science how creation really happened by natural means. Also, throw in how we got the laws of nature, naturally. Life only comes from life. Law of biogenesis. God is the reason for us and all we have. kzbin.info/www/bejne/gJqwoq2ElL6Gjrc The odds are NOT there. kzbin.info/www/bejne/jWLCfHiMlqisl6M kzbin.info/www/bejne/r4icmJStr79_qc0 kzbin.info/www/bejne/mpXEooarqdlol9k

[@Taegyn_Artemis]

"Love me some baby killin'!" *slowly backs away*

[@FreemanicParacusia]

Jeffrey *is* a baby after all…

[@HaeravonFAQs]

Darkmatter2525 is getting perilously close to making feature-length movies, and I'm here for it.

[@garethbaus5471]

The power corrupts series is pretty good.

[@bunnygirl8482]

Dark matter should make full script for Actual movie.

[@2fast2block]

Yep, you're there to be stoo-pid as always. How did you get around the first verses of the bible with God creating and giving life? Real science says nothing does nothing. Real science says if there was something there already it must fit with the evidence of what we know. We know the 1LT says there's a conservation of energy. It can change forms and neither can be created or destroyed. Creation cannot happen by natural means. The 2LT has various aspects, one being the universe is winding down, entropy. Usable energy is becoming less usable, so at one point usable energy was at its max. This all points to a supernatural creation, by a supernatural creator at a certain point in which matter, space, and time were created. When I read how it can happen otherwise, ALL the fools resort to science-fiction. Once a supernatural creation is accepted, then the next step is finding proof of what supernatural power did it. We KNOW these laws. We have NO doubts about them. We also KNOW that the laws of nature can't come about without a Lawgiver, God. So if you want to pretend to be smart, please give me the laugh by giving your science how creation really happened by natural means. Also, throw in how we got the laws of nature, naturally. Life only comes from life. Law of biogenesis. God is the reason for us and all we have. kzbin.info/www/bejne/gJqwoq2ElL6Gjrc The odds are NOT there. kzbin.info/www/bejne/jWLCfHiMlqisl6M kzbin.info/www/bejne/r4icmJStr79_qc0 kzbin.info/www/bejne/mpXEooarqdlol9k

[@vishalmihai]

Ya'll being double standard, you kill babies in abortion.

[@HavocPrime8989]

Looking back at growing up christian, it makes you wonder how you could ever believe some of this stuff. The questions about free will might have been my starting point in questioning faith, but it is the atrocities committed in the name of god that are the absolute final nail. These videos often express the same questions and feelings that I had years ago, and only got platitudes or "because the Bible says so" for answers. Keep up the great work.

[@Skylancer727]

Well me personally I just never personally believed. I just never told anyone till I was around 7 years old as I had a friend in boy scouts who told their mother that. Before that I just didn't have the guts to tell my mother as we went to church every day and I even was in Catholic school at the time. But man was public school so much better. We transfered a year after that as my older brother had troubles with their 8th grade teaching process. We all flew through public school though. Just so much better not getting tested every 3 days and learning religious lessons along side everything else. I literally went from basically brain dead to one of the fastest learners in every class. When we competed with First In Math in the entire school I was in 1-3 place every month even getting pulled out of class to learn fractions and decimals unlike everyone else in 3rd grade.

[@K162KingPin]

or "FAITH", you have to have FAITH that GOD did the right thing even if we don't understand it.

[@HavocPrime8989]

@@K162KingPin I see you have heard that same sermon.

[@sniperwolf50]

God only respects free will when it's a convenient way to dodge the problem of evil. Everywhere else, he has no problems trampling over people's free will, including changing their minds

[@HavocPrime8989]

@@sniperwolf50 That's exactly why the Exodus pissed me off. God actively sabotaged the pharaoh's judgement and free will by "hardening his heart", leading to the death and suffering of thousands of innocent people. But he loves everyone and wants the best.

[@shantube75]

Wow, that was a lot of good animation and thought bubbles. Reading Joshua greatly shifted my thoughts of the Bible, and this story shows a lot of my horror, in a humorous way.

[@Starkillr1]

Atheist love finding any way to spite God, it’s just so girly and feminine and childish. It’s like literally hilarious to see it. Imagine sitting there trying to come up with creative ways to deny truth. It’s like trying to prove the Earth is flat by measuring it.

[@Rachel98246]

How in the HELL do you keep convincing your wife to say such weird shit?! *It’s amazing* 😂

[@2fast2block]

Because she is as stooo-pid as DM, oh, and you too. How did you get around the first verses of the bible with God creating and giving life? Real science says nothing does nothing. Real science says if there was something there already it must fit with the evidence of what we know. We know the 1LT says there's a conservation of energy. It can change forms and neither can be created or destroyed. Creation cannot happen by natural means. The 2LT has various aspects, one being the universe is winding down, entropy. Usable energy is becoming less usable, so at one point usable energy was at its max. This all points to a supernatural creation, by a supernatural creator at a certain point in which matter, space, and time were created. When I read how it can happen otherwise, ALL the fools resort to science-fiction. Once a supernatural creation is accepted, then the next step is finding proof of what supernatural power did it. We KNOW these laws. We have NO doubts about them. We also KNOW that the laws of nature can't come about without a Lawgiver, God. So if you want to pretend to be smart, please give me the laugh by giving your science how creation really happened by natural means. Also, throw in how we got the laws of nature, naturally. Life only comes from life. Law of biogenesis. God is the reason for us and all we have. kzbin.info/www/bejne/gJqwoq2ElL6Gjrc The odds are NOT there. kzbin.info/www/bejne/jWLCfHiMlqisl6M kzbin.info/www/bejne/r4icmJStr79_qc0 kzbin.info/www/bejne/mpXEooarqdlol9k

[@JanieBee]

Love I guess, lmao

[@Kindness8811]

They just share the same humour. 😃

[@I_am_a_cat_]

Pretty sure if your significant other asked you to say some stupid lines to make money, you would too.

[@AXharoth]

faith

[@AeiThop]

This is fantastic. Everything about it. And the sneaking/tip-toeing spies were just hilarious.

[@loturzelrestaurant]

I fear the Quality of 'The Greater Insult' won't be replicated soon...

[@petelash4654]

The tiptoe killed me too lol

[@stylis666]

Can I just say... You know what, fuck that, I"m not saying a god damn thing! I'ma get a drink, this was fucking epic and I'm happy to just live in a world where this fucking video and people like you exist! You earned it! I'm celebrating! Hm... seems somewhat illogical. Try and stop me! :p

[@victorf8301]

How do you know they were spies?

[@reddiamondbutterfly337]

It was terrible honestly, bottom barrel level of humor. Actually you finding it funny made me laugh harder than this entire video

[@fred_derf]

And many people call the bible the "Good book". As usual, your retelling of a biblical story is simple genius. More please.

[@tinasibiya5194]

Thank you. I don't deny or affirm what's in it. But it's definitely not 'The good book'

[@Dock284]

*When you committed geocide against 3 cities because god says so*

[@existencemystery]

🎉 early morning, a toast, from the grail, our sacred cave, full of magic and treasure, wonders and ale 🍺 🥬🖍Lightning around

[@Johnmhatheist]

I call it the buy-bull

[@CorePathway]

“Good Friday”?!? What’s a worse day?

[@imagomonkei]

This video had me cackling with laughter on multiple occasions. I can't believe I used to believe this buffoonery.

[@pineapplepenumbra]

People brought up within systems find them normal (for the most part, I guess I'm a bit unusual, but even I regarded some slightly odd things as normal), so there's no blame attached to accepting what one is "taught" when young, it's a survival mechanism to trust what adults tell you (I'd probably have ended up being eaten by a sabre tooth tiger).

[@brunorhagal]

@@pineapplepenumbra Does that infer morality is a survival mechanism also?

[@Dr_Wrong]

​@@brunorhagal _"Does that infer morality is a survival mechanism also?"_ It clearly is.. BTW 'imply' is what a "speaker" does, 'infer' is what a "listener" does.. js

[@brunorhagal]

@@Dr_Wrong Funny, I pondered that, but considered the object of “that” to be another inference supported from the data, not his or her context. “As in, do you think the data infers morality is a survival mechanism too?” I felt my intent was just-cause. Tho, I feel your intent was less about a grammar lesson than a shot-across-the-bow ad hominem attack based upon your assumption I’m a creationist. Don’t do that. It’s douchey. I’m not. I completely agree with you. I was going to ask a follow-up about how morality plays-out in a high-scarcity, pre-science environment. Were these selective-morality genetic predispositions (asch and Milgram affects

[@pineapplepenumbra]

@@brunorhagal Societies evolve (and one can look at many societies from ants and meerkats to chimps and humans) and as they evolve, their rules evolve, too. Thus Slavery, something fuckwits considered acceptable in previous centuries (and let's face it, many animals, including rats, have demonstrated empathy, so if you're a human and lacking it, you're lower than a rat) is (for the most part, a few islamic ones still seem to believe that it's fine) considered unacceptable in modern societies*, so Slavery is a prime example of morals changing. There are many religious fools making the erroneous claim that without a god one cannot have morals, but this is a ridiculous claim, made by the hard of thinking. *Bear in mind, however, that they're just more subtle in how they impose slavery.

[@theprussian4616]

This channel is one of the reasons I am not a Christian anymore. The greek God's are looking mighty fine now days.

[@existencemystery]

🎉 early morning, a toast, from the grail, our sacred cave, full of magic and treasure, wonders and ale 🍺 🥬🖍Lightning around

[@edwardmiessner6502]

Especially Dionysus god of party animals and Antinous god of gay men (especially bottoms).

[@daydays12]

I am happy for you 🙂

[@TheSonic497]

You know, it puts a lot into perspective. I remember watching The Prince of Egypt back as a kid, and was basically skewered by my perception of what the narrative the Bible actually had. I wanted to learn more about Moses, so you can tell what little young me got some whiplash after reading just how much of asshat God treated Moses. Like, dude wasted 40 years of his life traveling in a fucking desert, in search of the promised land, while babysitting a bunch of Israelites that constantly eminated "Are we there yet?" energy, had to basically put all of the bad apples in their place, dealt with more complaining, asked god for help because babysitting a bunch of children in the desert for 40 years can only do so much to a man, while god told Moses to simply trust him, and water will come out of a fuckinf rock (because popping in an Oasis out of nowhere is out of the question, yet flooding the earth and parting the godamn dead sea isn't) Moses comes back, gets conplained again because the G-Man hasn't said shit to anyone but him, Moses gets fed up and hits a rock, and suddenly God takes that as a sign of bad faith from Moses and decides he'd rather just put Moses to death then and there, while everyone else fucks off to that promised land. Jesus, I hate the Bible.

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

Excellent summary!

[@noahbossier1131]

Admittedly prince of Egypt is a good movie but yeah it’s messed up

[@adams13245]

Not to mention God messes with pharoah's free will to make him go against his stated goal of freeing the Israelites, so he has a flimsy as hell excuse to rain down disgusting dangerous plagues on Egypt and kill everyone's first born sons, except the Israelites. I'm sure the slaves and farmers had pharoah's ear and totally had a hand in it. Including the freaking animals' babies, cause they were in on it too. Then, after pharoah lets the Israelites go, God brainwashes him again and has him lead his army into the red sea. Why? God wanted to slaughter people. That's it. God just wanted to "receive glory" by pointlessly slaughtering people. God literally murders an army that he had called up via brainwashing their leader, because he thinks it's awesome. That's the morality Christians claim to serve. Someone who murders hundreds, if not thousands for fun.

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

@@adams13245 -- An excellent review! Friendly Atheist did a long video about of how many people god murdered (source: bible). Also included: the death count of the Devil/Satan/whatever his name.

[@nabil5535]

@Norman 1, so what’s the point in freeing them them if they’re supposed to die before reaching their destination? 2. Go on and live your 40 years of life in the desert big man, let’s see if you found it fulfilling. 3. Not angry, just disappointed

[@pickyphysicsstudent201]

I like to imagine how these stories actually happened, without god in it. As in Moses suddenly died, without warning, while being in perfect health, with no witnesses and then someone else usurps the position of leader for the isrealites. Said new leader goes on a concuring spree. It makes you think..............

[@daswasich1147]

Seeing how Moses is not a historical Person i'd say it's probably bc two stories had to fit back to back in the narrative´but the 2nd one didn't have Moses in them. If you want a "Leader mysteriously vanished under suspicious circumstances" story i recommend looking up how the King of the Mali Empire "Mansa Musa" explained how he rose to power XD (Also just read about Mansa Musa in general, that mans influence on the world is hilarious)

[@davidtimmerman3121]

i concur

[@compulsiverambler1352]

The tradition that developed and which some Jews and Christians still believe, is that Moses wrote the Pentateuch, which includes this Deuteronomy story. So, Moses wrote about the circumstances of his own future death, about the god telling him he would now see the promised land and die. So how was any of it then a surprise when it happened, why did the god need to tell Moses again what was going to happen? The claim makes no sense. This is how the book of Deuteronomy ends: "Never again has a prophet arisen in Israel like Moses who knew the Lord face to face, who performed such miraculous signs and wonders that the Lord had sent him to do in the land of Egypt, to Pharaoh and to his officials and to his entire land. No one has had his mighty power or performed the great and terrible deeds that he did in the sight of all of Israel." Again, some people insist Moses himself wrote this, BEFORE he died, lol

[@finngswan3732]

I thought that too.

[@adams13245]

@@compulsiverambler1352 Sounds like Moses was just ensuring lasting brand loyalty. After all, how are people going to know you're an awesome, totally badass prophet, unless you tell them how awesome, badass and totally handsome you are?

[@MoanAlotsa_24-7]

I was laughing my butt off when you started showing all the animals lounging in pastures, not a care in the world, with me knowing what was about to commence, but the kittens playing and relaxing in the meadow was the icing on the cake. *chef kiss*

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

His art on that scene was very good. I watch a lot of videos about elephants and is art for that happy animal was perfect.

[@noahbossier1131]

Agreed

[@priyopurwanto-xw2df]

Who burried moses and then write the story...i've been thingking about it.

[@JohnV170]

God I suppose then 😆

[@Tom-iv3nd]

I’m an atheist and haven’t read that part of the bible (tbh I haven’t read much of it really) but I suppose what they might say is that god told whoever was writing about it after it had happened. A little bit like how creationists might say that Adam and Eve didn’t write about themselves it’s just god told the writer about them later.

[@TheEnd-um7yd]

Moses in most likely a myth.

[@SuperEdge67]

A ‘sticky quickie’ or a ‘spunky monkey’………..I love this channel.

[@slesperado]

This is the first time I've heard this story since I was a kid back in the 80s and 90s. Hearing it again as an atheist makes it sound so illogical. I am ashamed that I used to believe all of this stuff and think it was moral.

[@tariq_sharif]

Do not be ashamed, so many of have experienced the same. it is not our fault that society around prevents questioning this stuff (in Islam your very life will be forfeit if you even question).... but rejoice that your managed to think your way out of religion...

[@michealforguson5317]

When I first heard about this story in Sunday School I questioned many things about it. Like why did Joshua sends spies if God made him into a One-Man Army? Why couldn't the people of Jericho and the other cities just evacuate if they knew an army was coming to kill them all. Heck in the seven days of marching around Jericho, that was enough time to flee unnoticed. Hail storms.....yeah, don't think so. And time stopping just to kill more? Geez. Glad I no longer believe this religion.

[@jeremiahnoar7504]

It's a shame that your first revisiting of this story was a total strawman

[@fossforever512]

@@jeremiahnoar7504 it really isn’t much of one tbh

[@jeremiahnoar7504]

@@fossforever512 What makes you say that? He kind of included some things that weren't relevant and left out some things that were important to the story which kind of creates a weaker, hollowed out , easy-to-knock-down version of the real story. Wouldn't you call that a strawman?

[@DosYeobos]

The “not a spy” on tippy toes cracked me up!

[@theautoman22]

Thanks for this!! Lost my whole family to a cult, they don't speak to me anymore since I left the cult, nice to have some comedy in my world. Don't stop what your doing!!

[@sageosho9496]

Hi Glenn ~ I also left a cult religion. In 2007. I was wondering if it was the same one. I was a JW. You?

[@theautoman22]

@@sageosho9496 yep.

[@sageosho9496]

@@theautoman22 how long you been out?

[@theautoman22]

@@sageosho9496 about 8-9 years

[@jaysonraphaelmurdock8812]

I feel bad for you both. My father and his mother were both jw and they are both really f***ed up. Hoping you're both doing well.

[@LoveProWrestling]

I never understood the logic of killing all the animals as well. Sure all your enemies, fine. Fine. But aren't the animals essentially just more treasure like that badass robe god got so mad over?

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

Yeah, if god kills all the animals, what's he gonna eat? See Leviticus for his wide-ranging tastes. As long as it's char grilled, it seems he was happy. Oh, and often baby animals were perhaps easier on his teeth.

[@stylesrj]

Well in those days, animals were a sign of wealth and also required to be taken care of... and I guess it's to encourage the troops to keep moving forward, like burning the boats? Since you'd have to leave some of your numbers behind to raise the cattle...

[@costaliberta5969]

he is clear about it, for the fun of it

[@michaeldiekmann6494]

Scarcity keeps the people in line, I guess.

[@stylesrj]

@Norman So animals are now evil?

[@TheWinezen]

So interesting how churches never cover the cruelty of GOD to babies.

[@dragondude9637]

Oh they hate it when you bring those stories up....and I mean *ALL* of the stories.

[@evilnet1]

Not good for optics

[@FactStorm]

1 Samuel features god instructing the maiming and murder of babies lol, yet they complain about abortion..the religious nuts

[@2fast2block]

As if you know the bible. How did you get around the first verses of the bible with God creating and giving life? Real science says nothing does nothing. Real science says if there was something there already it must fit with the evidence of what we know. We know the 1LT says there's a conservation of energy. It can change forms and neither can be created or destroyed. Creation cannot happen by natural means. The 2LT has various aspects, one being the universe is winding down, entropy. Usable energy is becoming less usable, so at one point usable energy was at its max. This all points to a supernatural creation, by a supernatural creator at a certain point in which matter, space, and time were created. When I read how it can happen otherwise, ALL the fools resort to science-fiction. Once a supernatural creation is accepted, then the next step is finding proof of what supernatural power did it. We KNOW these laws. We have NO doubts about them. We also KNOW that the laws of nature can't come about without a Lawgiver, God. So if you want to pretend to be smart, please give me the laugh by giving your science how creation really happened by natural means. Also, throw in how we got the laws of nature, naturally. Life only comes from life. Law of biogenesis. God is the reason for us and all we have. kzbin.info/www/bejne/gJqwoq2ElL6Gjrc The odds are NOT there. kzbin.info/www/bejne/jWLCfHiMlqisl6M kzbin.info/www/bejne/r4icmJStr79_qc0 kzbin.info/www/bejne/mpXEooarqdlol9k

[@rhaenyralikesyoutube6289]

Yep, because like they want to control a woman's right to her own body when it comes to her reproductive health. We're just broodmares to pro lifers after all, because that's just our purpose in life to them. 🤦🤷🙄🙄🙄

[@benjaminhinz2552]

"Did thou taketh God's shit; don't lie to me. " Help me im dying

[@stevenpike7857]

I love these videos. It exposes the absurdity of these stories.

[@DaveCM]

It just dawned on me what really happened. Joshua killed Moses. Joshua was tired of being Moses' lackey and wanted command. So, he murdered Moses, told everyone that God did it, and assumed command.

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

It might make more sense(?) if Aaron, Moses's brother, killed Moses, but the Friendly Atheist reading of the bible hasn't gotten far enough (we're still in Leviticus, ugh!) and I don't know where Aaron is pre Moses's death. Maybe Joshua is one of Aaron's son, making Joshua a priest under his father... But your idea makes sense and any missing details can be filled in later, if they were mentioned in the bible at all. Probably not. The book needed a good editor.

[@noahbossier1131]

Possibly.

[@noahbossier1131]

@@debbys-abqnm4537 yeah possibly

[@bowdennthani732]

@@debbys-abqnm4537 Aaron died long before Moses did.

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

@@bowdennthani732 -- Hmm, that's interesting -- the bible (OT or NT) gave actual dates? After all, that's something God should know and be willing to put down in writing as proof. Good for you for finding it! That does explain why it wasn't "Aaron fought the battle of Jericho". Maybe it's in the book of Joshua, which we may get around to after Leviticus (Whoa...!).

[@laughingman3777]

Convenient to have a religion that grants you real estate owned by someone else. Why didn't I think of that instead of getting a damn mortgage.

[@mnm8818]

Cause God's gone in hiding these past 1000+ yrs, it found out that there's other land masses with people on it, would take way too long for Israel to conquer all of them, if it took the whole bible to conquer a measly hours drive strip of land. The Mongols god showed up the Bible gods land conquering and death killing abilities...

[@aralornwolf3140]

@@mnm8818 , I think Ares got there first, then Mars...

[@mnm8818]

@@aralornwolf3140 ha true, but can't discount the Mongols nifty tactics of killing people effectively and enslaving them, did it better than Bible God and Ares or Mars by a mile ha if that's a competition between the gods- would be a nice video on that- Olympic games between the gods

[@victorc2869]

I remember as a kid asking my parents how the israelites could keep doubting despite witnessing miracles first hand. And all they said was "I know, crazy right?", and shrug it off. That stuck with me for decades 😅

[@sapphire_m340]

As soon as I saw a new upload from DarkMatter, I clicked so quickly. You make amazing content.

[@emanuelefieni5761]

0:57 God's trolling voice is top notch. I can't stop rewatching it 🤣

[@perovrljic5409]

This is the best Festivus present I got. Happy holidays everybody.

[@pineapplepenumbra]

Happy Festivus to you (assuming that it can be happy, with the airing of grievances and feats of strength).

[@sunso1991]

18:59 the slow eye rolling back from the top of the skull it is pure gold and animation mastery! it is like a DMV, killing the soul of both the bureaucrats and the tormented visitors

[@2fast2block]

You are just a nitwit like DM. How did you get around the first verses of the bible with God creating and giving life? Real science says nothing does nothing. Real science says if there was something there already it must fit with the evidence of what we know. We know the 1LT says there's a conservation of energy. It can change forms and neither can be created or destroyed. Creation cannot happen by natural means. The 2LT has various aspects, one being the universe is winding down, entropy. Usable energy is becoming less usable, so at one point usable energy was at its max. This all points to a supernatural creation, by a supernatural creator at a certain point in which matter, space, and time were created. When I read how it can happen otherwise, ALL the fools resort to science-fiction. Once a supernatural creation is accepted, then the next step is finding proof of what supernatural power did it. We KNOW these laws. We have NO doubts about them. We also KNOW that the laws of nature can't come about without a Lawgiver, God. So if you want to pretend to be smart, please give me the laugh by giving your science how creation really happened by natural means. Also, throw in how we got the laws of nature, naturally. Life only comes from life. Law of biogenesis. God is the reason for us and all we have. kzbin.info/www/bejne/gJqwoq2ElL6Gjrc The odds are NOT there. kzbin.info/www/bejne/jWLCfHiMlqisl6M kzbin.info/www/bejne/r4icmJStr79_qc0 kzbin.info/www/bejne/mpXEooarqdlol9k

[@andrewdreasler428]

LOVED the buildup to "stopping the earth," seeing all the gorgeously-rendered critters (and especially the multi-species cub-cuddle-fest) and knowing that they are going to get the "ultimate yeeting," just really drove home what Jeffery was saying about this being a Very Bad Idea.

[@PhilJonesIII]

All living things become pink mist and pizzas.

[@user-b1i8u]

you think thats something? check this out. kzbin.info/www/bejne/mpiZZJyEabibeZY

[@edwardmiessner6502]

​@@PhilJonesIII Sausage pizza against cliffs in fact!

[@jougenakai]

This was outstanding you've really gone above and beyond with the amount of effort really, good job.

[@feenix1033]

This is so much of an undertaking and i'm so grateful i'm more than happy to support you via Patreon.

[@loturzelrestaurant]

Know Viced Rhion? And other Atheist-youtubers?

[@feenix1033]

@@loturzelrestaurant I'm more drawn to this cartoon satirisation of religion, so DarkMatter and NonStampCollector are really the only two Atheism oriented channels I watch. Call me simple but I prefer this style over long-winded oral debates. There's nothing better than watching this type of content because you can laugh endlessly at the absurdities of these ridiculous stories. I find the mere notion of religions so ridiculous I don't understand why people record themselves speaking for excessive lengths which is in effect to entertain the notion of religion, a waste of time in my view. So this channel and NonStampCollector are entertaining to watch, I'd only really watch a channel like Viced Rhino if he covered a particular topic and I was debating a theist on that topic, so as to do some research. I barely engage in debates anymore though, it's too much of a headache to argue with such obvious stupidity.

[@ShinyGolduck5]

God exclaiming Yes in excitement after Josh says he'll enslave the English sounding nation, priceless, also the shitstorm when God stops the earth, hilarious, great one as always

[@maniacsmaxs6815]

I like Jeffery's face at 28:53 it just screams "we are apart of an advance futuristic civilization how are you this dumb?"

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

DarkMatter2525's "Power Corrupts" series explains, if anyone is curious about what Maniacs Maxs points out :)

[@2fast2block]

@@debbys-abqnm4537 DM is a joke like his followers. How did you get around the first verses of the bible with God creating and giving life? Real science says nothing does nothing. Real science says if there was something there already it must fit with the evidence of what we know. We know the 1LT says there's a conservation of energy. It can change forms and neither can be created or destroyed. Creation cannot happen by natural means. The 2LT has various aspects, one being the universe is winding down, entropy. Usable energy is becoming less usable, so at one point usable energy was at its max. This all points to a supernatural creation, by a supernatural creator at a certain point in which matter, space, and time were created. When I read how it can happen otherwise, ALL the fools resort to science-fiction. Once a supernatural creation is accepted, then the next step is finding proof of what supernatural power did it. We KNOW these laws. We have NO doubts about them. We also KNOW that the laws of nature can't come about without a Lawgiver, God. So if you want to pretend to be smart, please give me the laugh by giving your science how creation really happened by natural means. Also, throw in how we got the laws of nature, naturally. Life only comes from life. Law of biogenesis. God is the reason for us and all we have. kzbin.info/www/bejne/gJqwoq2ElL6Gjrc The odds are NOT there. kzbin.info/www/bejne/jWLCfHiMlqisl6M kzbin.info/www/bejne/r4icmJStr79_qc0 kzbin.info/www/bejne/mpXEooarqdlol9k

[@ChillstoneBlakeBlast]

Ngl, This was one of the funniest videos yet. I love when they started to yell at each other and the guards are just walking

[@HighAdmiral]

This was hilarious, it was excellent! It's great to see a return to the kind of biblical parody you started off with, but with, naturally, a massive improvement in quality.

[@hoyinching9313]

14:16 Yehweh is just a warlord. He is definitely not interested to do industries.

[@Tannius]

Questioning that they went in and killed everyone right after god told them not to kill was what got me banned from Sunday School. What's creepy is that we had to sing a song about it.

[@user-tz5uq2bt1s]

Over the course of several years, watching your videos and the videos of a few others, but primarily your videos, led me to stop believing and leave behind Christianity. I just wanted you to know that you made a difference in my life and I thank you for that.

[@halebopp4747]

Leaving a belief system because of youtube videos. Lol.

[@user-tz5uq2bt1s]

@@halebopp4747 I probably made similar comments to people who opened up on this sort of content a few years ago. It's okay to laugh at me or mock me, I understand.

[@halebopp4747]

@@user-tz5uq2bt1s I mean if you did study and seeking beyond these youtube videos, even coming to the conclusion that God is false, you would not attribute these videos to leaving an entire belief system unless you are absolutely deranged. The entire channel is just terrible and deliberately misconstrued Bible hermeneutic with subjectivist commentary. That’s it. Please tell me you went at least beyond watching youtube videos and at least read a book or two by people actually qualified to teach about this subject?

[@user-tz5uq2bt1s]

@@halebopp4747 Of course I did. The first video I saw on this channel deeply offended me by how horribly it misconstrued the passages that it covered. I don't even remember how much I studied and studied. At one point, I remember telling myself that the budding doubt was the work of the devil. I remember telling myself that no matter how much I doubted, if I just told myself I believed, I at least wouldn't go to hell if such a thing existed. I tried to believe. I read the whole bible every year for 10 years. I went to after sermon classes and had hundreds of lengthy discussions. My journey severely damaged my relationship with my family. I didn't just watch some youtube videos and BAM! The comment I posted was to illustrate that these videos led me onto the path that ultimately caused me to end up where I am. They led me to dig into WHY what they showed was wrong, and one thing led to another. Now, the videos aren't offensive to me, no matter how they interpret things.

[@halebopp4747]

@@user-tz5uq2bt1s Ok, why did you apostatize?

[@jimroberts1943]

Definitely one to watch a couple of times more, with even more pauses to check the Bible references.

[@larrystevens7410]

I started watching, but waiting until later, after I have had a few hits of VERY LEGAL (Jeffrey Bless Canada) Cannabis. I know my Christmas will be Merry, how about you poor sods living in Trump's upcoming dictatorship? I shouldn't kid, I know Americans are suffering as they realize just how evil these people truly are. It truly is amazing that no one seems to talk about the root of the problem. None of this would be possible without religion. Specifically Evangelical Religion. If they magically disappeared, so would the justification for taking freedom from people based on a bronze age story book. I honestly feel sorry for America, and the rest of the world too. No one really believes the upcoming fight between Right and Left will be confined within American borders, do they?

[@Skylancer727]

Already watching it again to laugh more. Those slippers. XD

[@Skylancer727]

@@larrystevens7410 Yeah, but to be fair, even if we got rid of the religious, we would still be divided between the libritarian and federalist movements. But without people believing you must do what god says, make others also do so, and the idea the world could end tomorrow, it would at least reduce pointless arguments like abortion, climate change, etc. If the world isn't gonna end any day now climate change matters, and if god doesn't tell us the unborn being aborted isn't murder then why force others to follow your morals? Again there would still be divide but more of the ridiculous arguments fall away immediately. Though seeing how religious views have continued to plummet with each generation, it could very well be a dying bread soon. Though by soon likely 100-300 years.

[@gilly9666]

@@larrystevens7410 trumps dictatorship? Are you for real ? If trump was a dictator bidum would never have stolen the last election and fucked over Americans

[@fred_derf]

@@gilly9666, writes _"trumps dictatorship? Are you for real ? If trump was a dictator bidum [sic] would never have stolen the last election and fucked over Americans"_ "Trump's *upcoming* dictatorship", with reading comprehension like that, it's no wonder you're both a Republican and a conspiracy theorist…

[@PaulTheSkeptic]

"Why would you fear love?" What an insightful question. I'm asking that every time anyone says "God is love." from now on.

[@sundayoliver3147]

That one stopped me, too. A lot of people do fear love. I see that in myself, too. And this video may start to illuminate why that is.

[@coffeebux]

@10:19

[@amandayoung8615]

Jeez man, the amount of work you put into these is phenomenal. Brilliant.

[@SatanasExMachina]

It's a Christmas miracle! A new Darkmatter 2525 upload. Praise the void.

[@snake1625b]

Yes! Your Bible stories series is my favorite

[@powderedphantom5765]

For an atheist you probably know the bible better then most Christian’s

[@2fast2block]

No, he's just a dolt like you are. How did you get around the first verses of the bible with God creating and giving life? Real science says nothing does nothing. Real science says if there was something there already it must fit with the evidence of what we know. We know the 1LT says there's a conservation of energy. It can change forms and neither can be created or destroyed. Creation cannot happen by natural means. The 2LT has various aspects, one being the universe is winding down, entropy. Usable energy is becoming less usable, so at one point usable energy was at its max. This all points to a supernatural creation, by a supernatural creator at a certain point in which matter, space, and time were created. When I read how it can happen otherwise, ALL the fools resort to science-fiction. Once a supernatural creation is accepted, then the next step is finding proof of what supernatural power did it. We KNOW these laws. We have NO doubts about them. We also KNOW that the laws of nature can't come about without a Lawgiver, God. So if you want to pretend to be smart, please give me the laugh by giving your science how creation really happened by natural means. Also, throw in how we got the laws of nature, naturally. Life only comes from life. Law of biogenesis. God is the reason for us and all we have. kzbin.info/www/bejne/gJqwoq2ElL6Gjrc The odds are NOT there. kzbin.info/www/bejne/jWLCfHiMlqisl6M kzbin.info/www/bejne/r4icmJStr79_qc0 kzbin.info/www/bejne/mpXEooarqdlol9k

[@andrewknackstedt5458]

This is a low bar, because most Christians barely know what's in the bible.

[@badatheist9948]

most christian have no idea what is in the OT

[@eyalguz6303]

A lot of atheists who can explain why they are atheists know the Bible very well, especially the Hebrew Bible. Often, it is the very reason why they are atheists.

[@Lexicoley1826]

Most of us Atheists so know the Bible quite well, that’s why we’re Atheists.

[@rsync9490]

The 'not spies' sneaking into the city reminds me of medieval 2.

[@frimi8593]

hitman in a nutshell

[@jeckjeck3119]

Skyrim Sneak 101.

[@DarthVader-ch4um]

What's medieval 2?

[@FlSKMASTER]

@@DarthVader-ch4um A Total War game

[@justfrankjustdank2538]

i love how you cite the same part of hte bible 2 times in a row cause we wouldnt believe it otherwise

[@rapaciousinterloper4725]

A DarkMatter video over a half hour?! Maybe there is a god after all. I love it!

[@pineapplepenumbra]

"Maybe there is a god after all" Possibly, but a mature, intelligent, caring god, rather than the capricious, insecure, immature, inconsistent, immoral, illogical, insane berks of the biblical deities.

[@veenan4253]

😄😄😄

[@pineapplepenumbra]

​@Sex'' Allatus Angelus One thing I sometimes ask religious people is: Can your god create someone who is _more loving, more forgiving, more logical, more moral, more mature, more sensible, more pragmatic, more imaginative, more merciful, more just, more empathetic, more compassionate_ than itself? If they say that it can't, then they've just disproved the notion of an eternal Hell.

[@pineapplepenumbra]

​@Sex'' Allatus Angelus Yep. The childishness of the thinking of religious people is highlighted when they try to say, "ma god iz da powfulles' evah". They fail to see the logical impossibilities of being omnibenevolent, omnipresent, omniscient and omnipotent. The more _power_ they assign their imaginary friend, _the culpable_ that makes them.

[@domiro8156]

ALLELUIA!!!!!

[@frogglen6350]

this isn't satire. This is mostly the summary of the story

[@douglas2938]

1:02 "who's writing this?" is probably the most fun you can have by reading it.

[@moth5799]

With the stopping the sun part, I'll point out you could instead just make the sun be in a geostationary orbit around the earth instead, though that would probably mess up some other planets quite a bit.

[@MarijnvdSterre]

Or stopping the atmosphere with the Earth, considering the amount of magic needed (sorry miracle power) it shouldn't matter. If you can stop the Earth you can also stop the atmosphere. Still bonkers though.

[@pondboy3682]

Suppose the world were flat and it worked out fine for the Sun to "stop" somehow, there's still a couple problems: 1. How the ever living frock did they know it stopped for 3 days when they measured days by the Sun? 2. It ramps up from 60 to 120°F in one damn day there and now it would be warming up at night, too! How did they not bake to a crisp? There are only 2 choices with this story: either all the laws of physics were suspended so more people could be killed, or it's complete and utter nonsense.

[@moth5799]

@@pondboy3682 For 1. I suppose it could have been based off intuition, since humans do have some innate sense of time, but for 2. yeah they'd have roasted.

[@Dr_Wrong]

Or mirrors..

[@moth5799]

@@Dr_Wrong Or a second sun opposite the normal one.

[@jeffholland3502]

- Being a fan of Astronomy & Physics, that ending was Fantastic! Great job pointing out the problems with these stories!

[@edwardmiessner6502]

It's like the LORD keeps forgetting that he wrote the laws of physics and what they are while the Archangel Jeffrey has to keep reminding him that he's got a really bad idea!

[@waltersstreet]

This is so much better than the veggies tales

[@djthomas2293]

Yay, a DarkMatter bible story.

[@sassylittleprophet]

Those are the best kind.

[@imperatordei6615]

Roast Revelation next

[@sassylittleprophet]

@@imperatordei6615 OH MY GOD 😂😂😂😂

[@swimmingmide]

I remember learning about inertia around the same time I learned this Bible story and thinking something along the lines of "If that happened everything would end up as a red pulp". I also wondered why no other civilizations noticed the day being significantly longer than is should be. You would think the Chinese or Egyptians would have noticed.

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

Actually, various astronomical oddities have been noticed over the millennia. See recent YT video: "THE Earth Disaster Documentary", which is quite long but chock full of Science (except the last 5 minutes, that's all the poster's beliefs, meh). The Sun has done a lot of unexpected things and will continue to do them. Humans can observe and warn but not do a thing about what the Sun does (the Sun doesn't care about us). The Science in the video is as recent as this month (Dec 2021), but the poster does go back to when some interesting observations were made earlier 20th century.

[@swimmingmide]

@@debbys-abqnm4537 I'm not going to watch that, I don't care that much. If the Earth slowed down or stopped for a significant amount of time like what is suggested in the Bible, the damage of being lurched to the side at several hundred miles per hour would be lethal to everything. Some birds and bugs might survive far enough north and high enough in the atmosphere. If the earth did not stop or slow down that would mean the sun moved in a significant way that would have solar system ending consequences. The story does not work if you understand inertia and a sun centered solar system.

[@LM-jz9vh]

@@swimmingmide Exactly. The writers thought the sun revolved around the Earth just like they thought a solid dome or "firmament" covered the Earth. It's primitive nonsense.

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

@@swimmingmide -- watch it or not, I just like offering options for people with questions. If the video is even remotely right, the clues have been ours to observe for at least half a century, so we don't need to be surprised.😊😊

[@costaliberta5969]

coz nobody cares, its accuracy is worse than some 2-yr old's bedtime stories.

[@NoLuv4Hoz]

Wow. Just wow. Hard to fathom how this is not on prime time television. Better than Game of Thrones by far. lmao! Wonder what would happen if I played it in church.

[@inthedark334]

Please I absolutely love these animations this is so hilarious just looking at the stories with a common I shows just how insane the stuff is it's the best therapy I could ask for I would say God bless you but I'm an atheist now so thank you . I'm going to be telling every member of my family about your channel because this is liquid gold

[@Arch_Twisted]

Thank you, DarkMatter, for doing great work. Calling out scripture on it's bull needs to be done.

[@compulsiverambler1352]

Calling out modern religions' highly anachronistic interpretation of these texts, in which they project their "all-knowing, all-powerful, all-good" god concept on to a story that was about a magical being with limited power who could be a dick just like humans, making a favours-for-bizarre-favours (burnt offerings) contract with one group of humans, without any moral lessons being intended.The original authors' beliefs and intentions, the actual scripture as objective scholars can best reconstruct it, would have to be satirised differently because they've got a different set of problems. But I agree about the thanks and the great work.

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

Hemant Mehta, the Friendly Atheist (here on YT) has read Genesis, Exodus and now is on (gasp!) Leviticus. It's interesting (and appalling) what god gets away with that believers have no clue about (and don't want any clues). There is a growing audience for FA's weekly bible-reading videos. He also did a longer video on who has killed more people, god or the devil? Those results there were amazing, too (and DarkMatter could illustrate them, too).

[@Arch_Twisted]

@@debbys-abqnm4537 Well, the Bible's version of God is the Devil in my opinion, and the Bible was meant to spread a tribalist, hate-filled indoctrination among people. I mean, Bible-God is a vengeful, petty, jealous, grudgeful, spiteful, narcissistic, angry, fear-mongering, hateful, murderous being that calls itself God, and is a massive red flag, considering he also is supposed to be love, light, kindness, mercy and empathy. But its apparently only for some people, and its not very clear all the time who that even is.

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

@@Arch_Twisted -- we agree on many things. If we get to vote on our gods, I'd probably vote for all the females, then give them someone to sigh about in the form of Tom Ellis, Lucifer turned God. He's been influenced by a lot of wise women as well. :) In any case DarkMatter can illustrate it if he wishes. Maybe one day DM will tackle Yahweh's jealousy of "other gods"...

[@Arch_Twisted]

@@debbys-abqnm4537 If it's a voting system, id prefer to vote for whoever does the best job, despite what they are or the form they choose.

[@TheCheapPhilosophy]

18:43 All the All-knowing gods that may exist, are NECESARY accomplices in EVERY crime, ever. They cannot be good and do not act goodness.

[@xBwahx]

BIIIIITCH YES! I've been waiting so long for another one of these!!!

[@Kongodiantotela]

Honestly, the Babble is full of shit. Thank you for opening my eyes, DarkMatter2525!

[@josephbilling3886]

I just love going to the verses cited and seeing it 100% accurate to the text. P.S. You should cite all the texts in the description as well so I can read them beforehand and then watch the vid. Great work!

[@debbys-abqnm4537]

Maybe he could find a helpful reader who agrees that is a good idea, and he or she can prepare the texts and DM2525 could add them below the video :)

[@Arexion5293]

To play devil's advocate, it's not 100% accurate. I went to check Joshua 10:8 from Biblegateway and compared some translations, having to conclude that the verse doesn't specifically talk about free will. It's more of an analogy that could mean numerous things, the point being that the god has made sure that the enemy won't be an issue. Free will is a possible reason for this, but it isn't the only thing the passage could refer to. I will have a laugh if someone says that Bible can only be taken literally, because that passage will become nonsense in that case.

[@evidencebased1]

@@Arexion5293 I think Joseph Billing meant that the storyline follows the Bible narrative (and remember that there are many, many versions). The dialogue between God and Jeffery (eg. free will discussion)is not supposed to be literal, but is there to illustrate the hypocrisy. All good though and I’m glad you said “devil’s advocate” hehe.

[@Arexion5293]

@@evidencebased1 I did basically compare all of the versions. Biblegateway is pretty useful for doing that.

[@paulschlachter4313]

This should earn the Fundamentalist Certificate Of Biblical Accuracy.

[@deller5924]

And it is a nice animated Bible story for children, easy to digest.

[@emanuelefieni5761]

I crack a smile every time something nonsensical and incredibly dumb happens and a bible citation pops up

[@Death88758]

@@emanuelefieni5761 Isaiah 40:22 It is he who sits above the circle of the earth, and its inhabitants are like grasshoppers: who stretches out the heavens like a curtain, and spreads them like a tent to live in ... The earth is round and Science doesn't deny it. The Bible has more hidden knowledge than you guys think it has,and a blasphemous channel like this just adds to the people's ignorance and hatred of Christianity for no reason.

[@emanuelefieni5761]

@@Death88758 yeah, that's cute. Explain it to the people who use the bible to prove the earth is flat. I'm referring to the stupid, amoral and right out evil stuff that gets a pass "because a guy in da bible did it".

[@1970Phoenix]

Brilliant. I assure you DarkMatter that your efforts are worth it.

[@jancavelli]

The jeric-HO!!!! 😂🤣😂🤣 You killed me with that 😅🤣

[@Johnmhatheist]

I had to pause the video to stop laughing when I heard that

[@awbzerver]

I've missed these epic Biblical videos from you DM2525 . Thanks for producing another fantastically entertaining film that spotlights dead on the total ridiculousness of this horrible book.

[@costaliberta5969]

correction: horrible religion

[@Master_Conner]

The Bible is the worst invasion of my thoughts.

[@Thrna_1]

There is therapy for religious trauma.

[@sanderdeboer6034]

Great video! Can use it in debate with Christians. I was taught the song ‘the walls of Jericho’ in my Christian primary school. I still don’t understand how the teachers could do such a thing. Glorifying genocide like that.

[@compulsiverambler1352]

Were you taught the "rain came down and the floods came up" fun children's song about global genocide too? I was at my Church of England school, which is a very liberal denomination that only treats Genesis stories as fables, but what type of fables are these to make fun children's songs and picture books out of?!

[@sanderdeboer6034]

@@compulsiverambler1352 No, and I can’t find the equivalent in dutch. However when reading the song lyrics I am not sure if it is about the floods. I grew up in a reformed Christian environment were I am not sure what the motives were of the people teaching us these horrible things. One thing I still would like to know is why I only received the New Testament as a parting present of my primary school. I sometimes feel this was because they didn’t want me to read the horrible things in the Old Testament.

[@compulsiverambler1352]

@@sanderdeboer6034 Probably. At secondary school, we were also given only the New Testament, by The Gideons International when they visited once. It was the first time I read the New Testament in full, and realised that it seemed anyone who didn't believe in Jesus would be damned. They never taught us that at school, they presented a warm and fuzzy version of the New Testament without ever even mentioning hell.

[@demomanchaos]

Are you referring to the song Chris Jericho would come down to the ring to?, because that song is pretty cool. Y2J was awesome, I miss the Attitude Era.

[@sanderdeboer6034]

@@demomanchaos ? When I look this up I get some WWF wrestler. This is not a reference I as a European understand.

[@HolyRainbowism]

Been watching this at work and laughing out loud with tears in my eyes. Everyone came over and asked why i’m laughing like that. 😂😂 Brilliant!! More of this, please.

[@KingQwertzlbrmpf]

4:08 Now that's some top level spying right there^^

[@Penname25]

Back to bible stories? I love it!

[@cancelmeifyoucan]

Yes.... Been waiting for a new one thank you.

[@stevewalls4712]

I have been a longtime fan and this is the best you've ever done.

[@LivingDewCrew]

The goddamned “not a spy” bit had my ass rolling on the fucking floor

[@apk8340]

You are a very great cartoonist, painter, director, writer and the rest. These cartoons can open the eyes of people better than anythings if only it was shown on all the platforms and made sure that most people had watched it. Thank you for making and sharing these masterpieces. I already have watched this 3 times and am on my 4th, this is absolutely a Gem.

[@xHASSUNAx]

"We can invade other people's lands, and claim their land belongs to us. Because GOD SAID SO" Ahhh, the Palestinian-Israeli conflict in a nutshell

[@wizardwiz9218]

No, Palestinian Arabs came there the same way, there did not live a single Arab in that land before Umar Ibn Al Khattab, the 2nd Rashidun Caliph

[@youtlube7493]

@@wizardwiz9218 "palestinain arabs" ye you know how it is, because everyone that speaks arabic is automatically arab right? you prob think they all came from modern day saudi arabia lol

[@youtlube7493]

@@wizardwiz9218 i dont wanna comment too much but holy fucking shit this was the dumbest thing that i read, so you are telling me that all palestinains are decendants of the second Caliph and none of them originated there before hand eventhough all genetic testing shows they are levantian even ones that date back to 3k years ago? you are 100% a salty jew no doubt about it

[@FactStorm]

@@wizardwiz9218 Except nobody is talking about Khattab, but the modern 20th century conflict you fool

[@wizardwiz9218]

@@youtlube7493 just making baseless claims about me won't help, they are ethnic Arabs, just look it up There never existed any term as "Palestinians" before Yasser Arafat using it, the Biblical Philistines have no relation to the present "Palestinians" and they were only restricted to the Gaza strip

[@ErikVisser94]

Your videos really help me in an very difficult time

[@dimitar4y]

bro i absolutely love the way you portray "god" and his tantrums and everything. My sides are in orbit every time

[@palebluemomma1879]

Now I know why you asked me what would happen to the atmosphere if the 🌎 immediately stopped spinning.

[@dww6]

But it was such a upbeat song as a kid "Joshua won the battle of jerico; Jerico, Jerico Joshua won the battle of jerico, And the wall came tumbling down!"

[@aralornwolf3140]

So are most nursery rhymes... kids are too stupid to understand the context...

[@silvertail7131]

To me, the part at the start always felt like the, winners side story of a power struggle. Oh no... the old leader is dead, how? Guess we'll never know... anyway, our significantly more prone to violence and death leader, who totally doesn't kill to get what he wants is going to lead us on a merry slaughter.