XFM The Ricky Gervais Show Series 2 Episode 24 - I wish I was Ricky Gervais's mate

The Ricky Gervais Show Broadcast 1st February 2003.
Thanks for all your support, it's a privilege to be able to document these shows for other like-minded people to enjoy.
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[@ManMoth]

Hey guys, sorry for pinning this comment on all videos but I want to give you an update on the channel. I've been slowly adding a show archive to the videos including a full transcript added as sub titles and a full track listing (with links to KZbin videos for each track). Pilkipedia archive link has been added as well and I've been having fun illustrating some of KP's best bits, I'm adding these to a shop incase anyone is interested: www.man-moth.com/ It's taking me a while to update the archives, especially as I don't work Mondays so please bear with me as I chip away at it. Lots of love, Man Moth.

[@matthewstone1362]

U da man moth

[@arbutuscliff1]

Cheers mate-. From Canada

[@julianchamberlain5399]

Great work. Like discovering the Egyptian tombs and building museums for everyone to see. In fact better than that.

[@hankochai]

Whenever Karl’s says, “Alright, Steve, I’m not ‘having’ a go,” absolute gold follows.

[@mothmothmanmothman1541]

love how Karl said 'got ya' at the start when he asked how much it took to wake up a snail. He must've been so pleased with himself.

[@ShadyPlatinum777]

MothMothManMothMan I love how he thinks it was a good point

[@omikronweapon]

it amazes me, both how he thinks it's a valid point and WHY he thinks it's even related.

[@studkickass513]

It makes zero sense to me. Same to Ricky. I think Karl confused himself.

[@DunkeysLongLostSon]

It's amazing how you can still hear ricky laughing when you are hearing that movie bit Karl was in.

[@maxcohen13]

That 'smack my bitch up' sound clip Karl made is one of the most unpleasant sound I've ever heard.

[@omikronweapon]

The only thing worse to me is the clip he made where he eats some woman. That was utterly disgusting as well.

[@fiwen9673]

+OmikronWeapon or the following Born Slippy.. D:

[@Milan_Smidt]

+maxcohen13 all the sound clips he made are screams of agony. It's ridiculous.

[@Jokerhamil]

It's really weird how all of them are goddamn disturbing.

[@gangabiss]

The 'born slippy' one is the worst. Literally sounds like a baby being cut up with a circular saw I mean wtf?? Where does the electric saw come into it??

[@samsambo]

I can’t get enough of Ricky’s Manchester/Karl impression. It makes me laugh every time.

[@Adelehalsall]

Haha it’s much more like Lancashire than Manchester 😂

[@stechapo4009]

Another classic from the 'just the way I'm feeder' period.

[@kitpalmer1583]

"I forgot to bring in a Song For the Ladies this week, so I thought I'd play a song for people who enjoy the work of Deep Purple" kills me every fucking time. don't even know why it's so funny but it's one of my favourites.

[@ejayman]

Gets me every time too, a merchant classic

[@sneezydeezymcdeluxe7015]

I've got a new feature Rick. It's called, songs I'd like to play, on the radio.

[@pepijnverdonck6540]

plot twist: manmoth is actually dicky anderson

[@brownayy]

RANDERS

[@matthewbowen517]

@@brownayy YOU DICKY DOCKY DOO

[@mrdex8527]

The dick machine!

[@complainerino9121]

Dicksters!

[@AutomaticDuck300]

The Big DICK

[@Michael-and-a-Guitar]

I just wanna say I love you guys and I love our little cult family

[@spreadthelove77]

👍🏼❤️

[@arbutuscliff1]

Every night for six yrs

[@jianblundell6038]

"The greater good!"

[@LifeOfRy]

The Manson Family have nothing on us. N'that.

[@garethperry5365]

It's not gay

[@Steve90UK]

Bedtime, and another hour of absolute twaddle 😂

[@capnhawkins]

the birth of 'The Film Thing''! One of my favourite features, along with Songs of Phrase

[@omikronweapon]

it's actually impressively done. and quite funny.

[@odw_99]

Listening to this exactly 17 years after it was first broadcast by chance, one more year and this episode can drink and vote!

[@_booth7992]

These episodes should not be allowed to vote...

[@arstulex]

Here we are

[@chairmanmeow8388]

Kp looks after me

[@benjammin9471]

Episode has kids now

[@Milan_Smidt]

''That was real! Play a record.''

[@GalacticAstroparticles]

"There's no point in showing it me, all babies look the same!"

[@MinaF99]

I'm no Steve merchant, I love all the competitions that Karl has come up with, rockbusters is iconic, the film thing is amazing, and who could forget 15 Taiwan. But the sound effect thing quiz is genuinely the most horrible, horrific thing ever broadcasted on radio..

[@Pluggit1953]

Mina F broadcast*

[@MinaF99]

Pluggit1953 Piss off.

[@MinaF99]

Pluggit1953 Alright. Fuck off.

[@Pluggit1953]

Mina F You obviously have a very limited vocabulary and no grasp of grammar.

[@stfnkblm6738]

Are you Mina from Finland who e-mailed the show back in series 1?

[@MrNeilo911]

2003 - Ricky: I think Karl can go to Hollywood with what I’ve seen there(film thing) 2018 - Karl stars as the two main characters in his own Sky tv show (Sick of it)

[@Melbourne_Approach]

LAKE he said river LAKE he said river LAKE he said river

[@omikronweapon]

XFM 2-24 0:00 Badly Drawn Boy - Born Again 3:26 Wu-Tang Clan - Uzi (Pinky Ring) 9:23 The Cardigans - For What it's Worth 17:21 Manfred Mann - Mighty Quinn 17:31 Feeder - Just the Way I'm Feeling 21:27 Papa Garcia - Natalie and Nucy 26:34 Bruce Springsteen - Nothing Man 26:39 Eminem - Sing for the Moment 32:09 Teenage Fan Club - I Need Direction 36:48 Jessie Malin - Brooklyn 36:57 Coldplay - Clocks 41:51 David Bowie - Letter to Hermione 49:05 Eve feat. Gwen Stefani - Let Me Blow Ya Mind 54:38 Deep Purple - Hallelujah

[@stoox006]

+OmikronWeapon Great effort on all the episodes mate! I wonder if you kept stats on how many times they played Feeder :D

[@omikronweapon]

I thought about doing a statistic about it even before doing the track-lists. I decided it would be too silly and pointless to do seriously though :P I don't mind humoring you; out of the 25 episodes I compiled the list for, I count 17 Feeder plays. 10 times Just the Way I'm Feeling, 7 times Come Back Around.

[@stoox006]

OmikronWeapon Yep... will never perceive Feeder the same way again :D

[@WollongongWacko]

+OmikronWeapon you do gods work on earth.

[@phantomspade2242]

"the kids seem to like'em"

[@Camcordant]

“This is mentalists who do websites about themselves every day” - Ricky there, casually predicting social media

[@arstulex]

That doesn't really describe social media though. It's a stretch at best. What he described is more accurate to blogging, which already existed long before 2003

[@expressrobkill]

Gworg back in the ship they are a superior race.

[@re20bt]

Steve’s silence at 8:50 is deafening🤣

[@dickyanders8138]

Thanks for uploading all these Mammoth... oh I mean Man Moth

[@StealthyLiving]

These help me sleep. I'm forever in your debt Man Moth. Thank you.

[@alandodd3184]

snails sleep for 13 years. how much does it take to wake them up.....? got ya.

[@HopeVJustice]

Ha! :D Loved that little moment of ill-conceived grandeur from Karl! ;D

[@WollongongWacko]

Yeah im still lost with karls logic but I love it

[@Geodude123man]

The 2 rockbuster clues in this episode are some of his best. Bonnie Tyler! FANTASTIC

[@chrisyruddy7254]

Still listening to these in March 2019

[@hansno1475]

March 2020 BAYBEEEEEE

[@_booth7992]

March 2021! Wait too early... I’ll come back next year

[@lmarajoyce4676]

Oct 2020!

[@thejoker114]

@@_booth7992 you're late

[@_booth7992]

savage_turbot fuck! Lemme go for March 2022

[@markbeavan6817]

So, maybe 100 dedicated people have viewed this about 3000 times each right?

[@freddyflinty3703]

15 years an counting with a 3 months loop of start of these to the guide to and halloween stuff.. I'd love to be shown something of theirs that I've not seen but I can't find anything lol

[@markbeavan6817]

@@freddyflinty3703 here again as well brother!

[@tonystevens2783]

great stuff best radio ever

[@wanalikdemfeet]

"Gibbon on the horn" haha

[@ShaunRL]

Karl has introduced like 10 different features over the past few episodes.

[@shanebrown1544]

Visionary

[@sneezydeezymcdeluxe7015]

The way Ricky's laugh perfectly blends into the start of that Eve track is just pure gold.

[@seanmoran1375]

Pissing myself at the Rain Man bit around 32:50 when Ricky goes "well, you've lost again - yep"

[@enterthenoid9438]

The alien segment has to be one of the most underrated bits in the show

[@stalk8r]

Suddenly I understand why I found a poster for the Sixth Sense with Karl back in the day while browsing the internet.

[@djjagster]

Vilkku .

[@gromitpesley]

Vilkku what part of the video is it?

[@Wagoo]

We need to use deepfake tech to put a little Karl in the film with all his lines replaced..

[@WOOOPdoctorFROGhere]

@@gromitpesley the middle bit

[@ieuanmartin7845]

I’ve always wondered if Karl decided when to queue in the next song and faze out the chat, or if Ricky/Steve give him a signal to do it. If it’s always Karl he’s got to have an acute instinct/knowledge for comedic timing in radio, pretty intelligent

[@perrybryan]

I've always wondered that too. I find it a bit at odds with his oblivious persona - because it's always so well timed

[@barryoffeastenders]

Yeah I always wonder that too. I just assumed they signalled because he's doesn't seem as switched on as that

[@KevWilby]

Well at the time he was a radio producer of couple of xfm shows. And after listening to these radio shows multiple times, he does have excellent comedic timing so to give him some credit he is actually good at his job.

[@alexhodgkinson6718]

@@KevWilby Yeah and most of the time he knows what he's saying is funny. The way he often words things is obviously meant to be funny. People say he became less funny when he became self aware, but honestly I think he's always known he's funny and words things a certain way to lean into it

[@eljeffrinho]

I’m pretty sure Karl was head of production at XFM, you don’t reach that sort of position unless you’re a very switched on type of person. His talent and comedic ability is obvious from the various bits of production you hear on these shows. He plays the part well but he’s no dummy.

[@petejackson7881]

I have no idea why everyone keeps hating on Steve. Steve is usually the one that steps in to Karl's defense, and is usually pretty fair. Sure he has digs at Karl, but certainly no more than Ricky does. And Ricky is WAY more obnoxious in the way he treats Karl. Steve does banter, and when Karl bites back he makes it incredibly personal, because Karl is just petty. And you know it happens off air too, and Ricky is the one that constantly winds Karl up off air. It really surprises me, cos Steve is so funny, and i dont understand the hate. Sometimes Gervais drives me mad with his shouting and immediate dismissal of Karl saying stuff that sometimes makes a lot of sense.

[@HopeVJustice]

I second this notion! (; They all have their weaknesses, but they all have their strengths, including Steve! And a major plus is that he does defend Karl and ridicule Ricky several times throughout the series!

[@bigfatpieface]

completely agree. when I first found these I wasn't a big fan of Steve but as time has gone on (think I'm on my 10th round) I've definitely come round. he's emerging as maybe my fave. he's very quick and funny and I just think people have the wrong idea about him

[@MrNeilo911]

Pete Jackson - he gave our Karl a dead arm though :(

[@mvwil]

Pete Jackson j

[@tashkirby6969]

Agreed! I am equally obsessed with all three for different reasons but Steve is definitely the funniest and quickest. I think the people who hate on Steve forget all the stuff Karl says about him, let’s be honest they’re obviously friends and i think Karl can hold his own against Steve anyway and gives just as good as he gets

[@scottellison2006]

Rock busters is a brilliant idea. Love how whatever the artist title doesn't necessarily have to be what the clue is 😂😂

[@maximumbeans9310]

I love that when they’re dissing the psychic they say that it was a 50/50 chance the gran was dead and that the person sounded in their mid 30s so the odds were high, while completely overlooking the fact that you wouldn’t ask a psychic to contact your living grandmother 😂

[@AA-hg5fk]

Not necessarily, this is a good way of testing a 'psychic' - ask them to contact your (living) grandmother, if they really were psychic they'd know that your nan was still alive.

[@rumbleshakes]

Karl talking about why he doesn't like wearing ear plugs was so mental until he wrapped it up at the end and it all made sense.

[@HopeVJustice]

Haha yes!! He did say another time though that he didn't like using them because he could hear his heartbeat.. I have the very same problem, he's not the only one (as Ricky somewhat assumed)! ;p

[@ryanmortimer9849]

Karl Pilkinghorn

[@mayhaps1]

Praise the Man Moth for uploading these!

[@carlostdied1184]

Mammoth?

[@angusjtaylor7745]

34:10 “we can slowly fade it out without them knowing” he says whilst broadcasting to the audience of the show

[@Mattbuildsstuff]

the picture's funny because karl carries the whole show.

[@ManMoth]

Mattbuildsstuff Yeah totally, I think it's supposed to be a nod to an old Nirvana band shot where Kurt was held up by Krist an Dave... which may then make Karl Kurt.

[@ManMoth]

raami jackson Haha, I think he'll probably just move to Wales and get a paper round.

[@ZevesG]

+raami jackson dont think the same things that makes Popular comedians and entertainers kill themselves apply the same way to Karl, at most i can see him quitting entertainment.

[@Lamedvavnik]

+Man Moth or walk a dog... But only if it's sunny.

[@anonymousguy1188]

Or Karl is like a big fish they caught. So they're saying hes quite a catch

[@mitchjames8432]

"... and definitely get some Flash. Or maybe some Vim."

[@Scallion_D]

"Hadn't seen my sister for 12 years and for some reason I met her in a car park in Wales." Lol.

[@bubbledmango1373]

Steve: "This Gives Us An Insight Into How We Lived 4000,5000 Years Ago, That's A Historical Incredible Document" Karl: "They Eat Seeds"

[@AA-hg5fk]

No surprise...

[@WesGryllz]

Why are there thumbs down on any of these? Karl is pure genuine adolescent brain with no filter. He’s technically a comedic genius.

[@frarfarf]

TATTOO STAN

[@charliecleary6798]

Isn't that an old Russian province?

[@HopeVJustice]

Ta' ooooooo Stan!

[@williamsmith666]

"I don't even know I'm talking to you about Tattoo Stan --" "NOR DO I, KARL!!"

[@omikronweapon]

@@williamsmith666 i love it when Ricky actually loses it for a second. He réally is there just for his own amusement. To be himself and do whatever he feels like. It's a wonder they never got canceled for just yelling, screaming and swearing at eachother and making very little content apart from it.

[@capnhawkins]

5:02 Ricky always calls Rockbusters "Rockbuster"

[@xxczerxx]

I was just thinking, I wish I was Ricky Gervais' mate.

[@mrdex8527]

The squid! I love this one 😂

[@lewis_hughes]

It looks like Ricky is still nicking stuff from the XFM shows for his stand up, The bit at the end where Karl is talking about pictures of babies is very similar to a bit Ricky does in Humanity...

[@lindzht]

Being so familiar with these XFM shows it really does effect how i enjoy Ricky's standup. I saw him live during the Science tour and the best bits I recognised were from these radio shows. My favourite tour (Politics) did have Karl doing research for Ricky (Gervais he mentioned this himself a few times) and you can tell

[@THCgoodness]

He’s still doing it now with the Armageddon tour

[@a_b897]

“Bit of a weird name anyway, it’s actually called Crap...”

[@CORNISHDUDE]

Still waiting for "Gibbon on the horn"

[@borismuller86]

Listener emailing in using “arbitrary” was definitely just made up by Steve.

[@fitz171]

Yep, yep, yeah, yep, sure, right, yep, yepyepyepyepyep - Ricky Gervais

[@papnlilly]

Literally just looked at the poster/thumbnail properly... It's absolutely perfect!

[@paragraphs7235]

18:16 is gold

[@Crunch_Buttsteak]

"Walkin in ills"

[@Kate-go9tp]

I searched the snail fact up and apparently they sleep for 13 hours a day

[@Ollied]

'They are a superior race' hahaha

[@cartmanofsp]

+Ollied Gorg back on the ship!

[@audiowombat]

Cool name bro

[@Ollied]

haha xD

[@EvilToaster77]

Oh man, Ricky's laugh at 45:23 after Karl says "So leave it. Just bury it" when talking about the Ice Man research being pointless, is perfect. Karl really has no interest in history saying it "doesn't matter".

[@DDoig1]

Do you think there's anyone listening to these who listened live in the early 2000's?

[@agentsmith4763]

DDoig1 wheres dicky anderson

[@vocalist92]

Ah I'm a late listener, it was the animated series and idiot abroad where I learned about the trio and just worked backwards to the origins of that. Really weird hearing the current affairs to a twenty year old radio show, since I was only a kid when they were topical

[@user-ew7nz3yw2i]

Yup. Hi.

[@BobbyTMF]

Agent smith he’s an author now

[@user-ew7nz3yw2i]

@Callum Booth Thats an understatement. For last 20 years ive been using the boys audio to get me through. From cancer to only survivor on plane crash, ive dealt with it all. So glad i found it when i did.

[@errorcode202notfound5]

Ahhhh. The old classic “alright Steve... am not ‘avin a go”

[@omikronweapon]

" 'n that"

[@omikronweapon]

Karl, for all his obvious faults, the one I forgive him the least for, is exactly that one. Slagging people off, while in hís mind it's totally fine, because they really dó look odd. Whether he means to or not, the ONLY point of such remarks, is to insult people. Áctually not having a go, would just be shutting up.

[@errorcode202notfound5]

He’s alright our Karl. He means no harm. Funny lad 👍🏼

[@errorcode202notfound5]

@Derek Knight being a Manc myself I can definitely relate

[@scottmroberts]

Karl Pilkinghorn from Dallas. Hi, we're cousins!

[@brianhurley2194]

I'm amazed Ricky and Steve never said anything about that "smack my bitch up" sound effect. THAT was bad!

[@jenanahulu]

agree, that's the worst thing Karl has done

[@petejackson7881]

Born Slippy is the worst

[@liambennion9627]

He had a dog and he thumped it

[@alandodd3184]

Even if the ice man wasn't murdered he'd be dead by now so just leave it. in a way I can see what he's saying.

[@fathercoswald4665]

best quiz theyve ever done

[@searchingforpennies]

1st February 2003, the day of this broadcast, the Columbia Space shuttle disaster happened.

[@AA-hg5fk]

That's why we should stop messin' about in space.

[@stillbyyourhands]

Amazing

[@sobchak1]

Justin TimberLAKE! he said 'river' LAKE! he said 'river' LAKE! he said 'river'

[@HopeVJustice]

It may not have been a valid clue, but it WAS easy to get! :p

[@syok4929]

Justin Timber-lake you said river. Lake you said river. Lake you said river.

[@JJTheawesomeHD]

You guys rock best community

[@samuelraji8343]

Got You!!

[@jackamodo]

I have just realised were all Richard anderson

[@jenanahulu]

Isn't Richard Anderson on the Matrix?

[@WollongongWacko]

Call us all cockers

[@JB-wy8fc]

Definitely Mr Anderson. Can't remember what his proper name is. I know its not neo

[@kevinflemming5928]

Thomas is Neo's "real" name.

[@jiayojames]

The real randers on twitter

[@thebandcoca]

Why oh why did they never do the feature ‘Gibbon On The Horn’. That one could run and run.

[@cartmanofsp]

Ooo, how do you do that? Look at that.. Have you seen your head?

[@TheBossman9001]

36:35 always cracks me up

[@tmmy1106]

Rickys columbo impression ..quality

[@pushthetempo2]

The title of the film thing should have been Karl's on Film

[@400hpGTO]

You’ve got a good eyes on ya, Steve

[@scottmroberts]

[Ricky going on and on] Ricky, one second later: Right, shut up everybody. What are you saying?

[@crazyotto9770]

I genuinely wanted the feature to be “Hollywouldn’t” instead of “the film thing.”

[@GrimAnglo]

Karl Pilkinghon, from Dallas. Hi! We’re cousins

[@DunkeysLongLostSon]

The title of the video should be "I wish I was Ricky Gervais's mate"

[@ManMoth]

Dunkey LongLostSon I agree :-)

[@LouieC]

What was it prior?

[@SeskoGames]

+Man Moth Yes what was the title prior???

[@fiwen9673]

+Louie Cafarella probably didn't have a title before

[@Christophee1987]

+Louie Cafarella I last listened to these nearly a year ago and a lot of them didn't have titles, so I assume this was one of them.

[@jamestaylor1445]

33:30 have you seen yer ed! May be one of Karl's greatest lines

[@alexenglush7027]

The Twixth sense

[@julianchamberlain5399]

Shame the musics not included as its much better than radio today

[@hankochai]

A Google search in 2022 shows various stories saying that some snails can sleep for 3 years. Karl mistook that for 13.

[@wh0586]

Actually twins happen in one of two ways; either 2 sperm cells impregnate 2 eggs or a fertilized egg splits into 2 and then the cells in both keep dividing to form identical twins. So the latter do share the exact same chromosomes hence the name identical twins

[@PaddyRoon7]

Idk why they never did a phone-in where one caller per week gets to give Ricky an idea on how to torment Karl, and they get a prize depending on how much he hates it.

[@n0rdicwarking]

Harm Karl

[@beemail6983]

Clairvoyant ? Is that her name ? 😅😂😂

[@theweedledrop]

Ricky's Columbo is great

[@louisbrennan1012]

Karl PilkingHORN! We're cousins!

[@studkickass513]

His knuckles are draggin' on the floor, he's a Neanderthal man, they think, "Hang on... Karl Pilkington!"

[@studkickass513]

How much does it take to wake them up? Got ya!....... wtf is Karl talking about?

[@ArsenalsJack1992]

Jake Baum 🐌

[@HopeVJustice]

Perhaps a 5 minute long trump from the good Lady with the split tennis ball? ;D

[@studkickass513]

@@ArsenalsJack1992 well obviously they're talking about snails, but that one statement makes zero sense. Which, tbh, is par for the course for Karl.

[@ArsenalsJack1992]

Jacob Baum jeez man this was 2 years ago, lockdown really getting to you huh lol

[@studkickass513]

@@ArsenalsJack1992 LMFAO!!! Fair enough. But, instant response? Quarantine got ya lonely, huh? LOL

[@ShadyPlatinum777]

“Ow you wouldn’t have that on your ed”

[@kevingallagher406]

rickys accents are underrated

[@nayf7682]

Steve: I don't mean to be disrespective! 🤔

[@bobbyaxelrod5959]

That was real