You Can’t Shame A Gay Boy Straight | Gareth Patterson | TEDxStormontStudio

Can our sexual identity be altered through psycho-therapeutic interventions, or even prayer? And what would drive someone to want to change this deeply personal and very natural side of them? In some parts of the world it is still legal to offer specialist therapy in an attempt to re-orientate someone’s same-sex attraction. General Practitioner Dr Gareth Patterson shares his own personal story of growing up gay within an evangelical Christian community, the shame he experienced, and the circumstances that led him into Conversion Therapy (and out the other side). #NoMoreShame Gareth is a qualified medical doctor and member of the Royal College of General Practitioners. In 2019 he took up a GP Partnership post in East Belfast. Outside of his clinical job, Gareth is a proud advocate for the city he lives in and the country he loves. In 2017 he launched his own business, NI Coffee Maps, producing a series of pocket guides promoting the best local independent specialty coffee shops in Northern Ireland which is the first of its kind in the UK and Ireland. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

[@musicdirector8661]

It breaks my heart that this is even an issue for our youth. I am 58 years old and I listen to this man like it was back in the 1980’s with all the hate and prejudice that I grew up with. These so called “fake Christians” have no idea how much pain they have inflicted on our children because of their backward and uneducated views. I am so happy to see that you are moving forward with your life with no more shame and fear and challenging those around you.

[@bherrin67]

Same 🤚🏻💔

[@AndrewtateIsinjail]

Thank you queen or king for supporting 🏳️‍🌈 🏳️‍⚧️

[@selispeks]

The world needs YOUR memoir. If you wrote this script yourself, your talent is IMMENSE, and your story can help millions. Thank you so much for telling your story ❤

[@desfrancis2543]

At 63 I'm only just Starting the process of accepting that my evangelical Christian upbringing led me to shut down and hide from myself and be overcome by the shame that haunted me all my life.. No more shame is my goal. Thank you so much for sharing xx

[@wendyshannon789]

Gareth, your story is powerful and impactful. My nephew came out 15 years ago, and he had the same struggles with his church and Christianity. Thank you for sharing and will be sharing this with my wonderful nephew!

[@hansherrmannshausen9669]

i prayed to god to be changed, too. in the 70ties. The brilliance of Gareth's talk is, that he shares how deeply hurtfull and painfull this feeling of shame is, which was imposed to us. But that alone can be re-traumatizing to hear, depressing. Instead, he shows how far he got in transforming the impact of the unhealthy power structures over him, and to reconstruct a healthy self. He speaks so breautifully, his voice sounds form the depth of his heart and soul. Thank you so much, Gareth.

[@nesa2000]

Beautifully and articulately spoken. Thank you.

[@chnalvr]

Spot on, 100%! Living openly and authentically will not waste so much human potential that we really need in our world.

[@leeboriack8054]

Hope he has a life filled with happiness and finds the love of his life!

[@roberthutchens7004]

Beautifully chosen words expressing a profound message in just about the most beautiful spoken English I’ve ever heard.

[@juliancoulden1753]

What a beautiful man.

[@mikevale3620]

Very powerful and uplifting. I'm so pleased you found your path Gareth.

[@oliverlondon5246]

Incredibly powerful and impactful. Thanks for sharing. No more shame!

[@denniscampeau6577]

Brilliant young man! Love is always the best answer.

[@ozfritz69]

Thank you Gareth, for your story, for the pain you experienced growing up. In my case, it was easier to remove myself from the situation (I.e. the church and sadly family as well). As you eloquently state we lived with shame. I will never lose sight of your closing words about self-love, don’t let anyone put you down so one day this shame we endured and unfortunately has left us damaged will be no more and living is living regardless of who you love. Thank you!!!🤗

[@nexty2]

Thank you for sharing your story. As someone who has had a similar experience this speaks to me.

[@judesharvin4238]

Illuminating, Intelligent and moving. Gareth, you’re exceptional

[@stephendavidbailey2743]

At age 77, I still have the struggle I had at age 7.

[@steelcrown7130]

That is appalling. I was also 7, but it was 1967, so I am a little younger than you. I hope the struggle passes, and peace takes its place. It did eventually with me.

[@auguststudio2707]

Hmm, I'd love to hear all about your journey.

[@auguststudio2707]

Hmm, I'd love to hear all about your journey.

[@Ravisingh-hm2kx]

Why God has made us ,better I would have died in my young only 😭😭😭😭.

[@rahil5989]

​@@Ravisingh-hm2kxwe can connect, I am from india.

[@roberthernandez4975]

God loves you and does NOT judge you. We are our own worst enemies. God accepts and loves you exactly as you arenas beyond your wildest dreams. People judge not God

[@martiansonmaui1749]

Thank you for sharing your experiences, Gareth. I hope you are finding happiness on your own terms.

[@charlesjohnston1506]

Thank you for your beautiful testimony. I hope you will share again.

[@xzavierhamlet265]

Thank you for the beautiful message and story ❤️

[@thestickgatherer]

Wow! Incredibly powerful. Relatable. Thank you for sharing. Very appreciated.

[@upsupeter]

God made you just the way you are. There is no shame in that remember this life in not a choice. Your perfect go live your life and be happy. ❤

[@LemarSipes]

This is true. God mage me a pyrimaniac, I love to burn things down. I was born this way, always loved matches as a kid then explosives. I go to church and feel no guilt, I didn't choose to be this way

[@ludovicleprinceroyal8721]

@@LemarSipes proud of you....as long as you're not Irish

[@FinianSeaberg]

Thank you so much for sharing that! As a side note, I have always loved the Irish accent and I could listen to you talk all day!

[@franklinshouse8719]

Very well said. A great story. The shame you feel is the direct result of religion. Religion poisons everything. Coming out is hard enough, but adding religious shame to it makes it all the more difficult. I hope you can continue down the path you are on, with or without religion. Btw, I'm an MD from the US.

[@LemarSipes]

Well one of the worst religions of the world is Humanism of which you embrace. Human nature is the most vile since it is separation & rebellion from the Creator. It is just as bad as those who believe they are religious yet live as humanists

[@garymagruder7154]

My male partner (husband) now in the U.S. have been faithfully together for sixty years . We are now in our eighties. Together forever, EDLOVESGARY

[@Pk-wu9tl]

@@garymagruder7154we need people like this ❤

[@Brigadier_Beau]

Similar to my own teen years. This breaks my heart. I hate that children still have to live in silent fear, shame. 😢

[@selispeks]

My exact thought after finishing this: "That was beautiful. Thank you ❤" I couldn't say more. Just so beautiful. Thank you ❤

[@carolbell4811]

No, you can't, nor should you. I would accept my child and love him or her.

[@MiKe_Az2]

Accepting ourselves is the best way to live fulfulling life!❤ I hope your message reaches to every person out there 🙏

[@dennissmallwood9082]

You have a beautiful story. I hope you are happy and loved.

[@dbona4445]

Love Yourself. That says it all. Just love yourself.

[@chuckvaughn]

I'm sorry you had this path to travel. I hope you are doing well today. God loves you. Exudes international hurt too many. Hugs to you.

[@YananoBere]

This is so beautiful and illuminating ❤️

[@roysmallian2889]

What a Wonderfully spoken understanding of his life condition. He speaks poetry.

[@sweetbb125]

Thank you for telling your story, it could easily have been me talking for the most part. It is a more universal story than what society would like to believe or admit.

[@GrotrianSeiler]

People don’t understand it’s not a choice. Just like it’s not a choice to be straight. Someday maybe this won’t be an issue.

[@lesperonis1146]

Well done Gareth ! You spoke the truth from your "Heart" ❤ not the interlect from the head ! Thank you for sharing this with world ,I can only imagine the massive amount of people that you have helped by telling this spiritual truth. 🙂👏

[@crisvelundertale2159]

i really like the musicality of his voice

[@tolstoy431]

Indeed beautiful spoken...NO more shame....you of all people should be Happy....because you struggled far to long....I hope you will find Your Man as soon as possible....Let your SOULS be Free FINALLY....And DON,T let anyone Hurt your PRECIOUS SOUL AGAIN.....EVER....❤❤❤

[@cantstopthefeed]

Awesome talk man!

[@shaunkilpatrick2113]

Thank you! ♥May we all live in love ♥

[@johnpresley4108]

Love you so much man, my lifes been a lot like that mate, thank you for your story/sharing

[@marknewport8151]

The word "Homosexuality" was NOT in the Bible until 1946. It was an "Editorial Decision". Consider the hatred that that "Editorial Decision" has fed and the lives destroyed. The Bible is NOT inerrant, but a highly edited and modified collection of books (some discarded from the collection when they didn't fit the chosen narrative) and stories from "pre-history". "Pre-history" is a period prior to written history. How have those "Pre-history" stories changed when only communicated verbally? Consider the familiar parlor game of "Chain of Whispers". Take ten people and begin with a whisper in one ear to be shared with the next and the next. After only 10 whispers, the message is entirely different. Now take that chain of whispers and multiply its repetition over years and generations. Hate is a terrible thing and hurts millions of people, yet there is nothing more satisfying to the righteous than to Hate in the name of God.

[@jakejackson8238]

They so enjoy putting on that ghastly, fools-no one grin as they express their “love and concern “.

[@johndurham1633]

Thank you for shining light & hope

[@johnpresley4108]

You seem like such a good dude, wish you were my friend. Cheers from the Us, Oklahoma City to be exact. Hof bless you for your courage man. Seem like a wonderful dude.👍❤️

[@johnpresley4108]

God bless, can't type!:)

[@gmcm7432]

Proud of you for this, Gareth

[@alanthompson9871]

Thank you so much for your words. I am grateful for them and I know they will help many (including those of us who have already gone through what you have)

[@cainen6355]

Intense, with a very inspiring and uplifting conclusion.

[@gsxrcharlie]

Thank you so much for sharing your story and powerful message. I also grew up in a N Irish evangelical church and could identify with everything you said. Thankfully, I eventually saw the light and freed myself of the shackles of their loveless dogma and judgement. Keep living in the light Gareth, the light that is you and your kindness to yourself and to those around you.

[@billligon4005]

You are so well spoken, your talents lie in teaching/writing/acting and YES loving someone special. It all gets better - much better just you wait in see.

[@tenorchazz4274]

BEAUTIFUL!!! 🙏🏾👏🏾

[@davidolien2828]

You are an incredibly gifted human being

[@danielwilda8167]

What a brave beautiful strong MAN you are! Best wishes for a joyful life and t freedom from shame that is yours to enjoy who you were created by God to be! Much love to you my Brother 🌈👍🙋‍♂️⭐️💪🏳️‍🌈💜🇺🇸✝️❤️

[@sandrew255]

Just fantastic. I’m in awe of you. ❤

[@ralphwortley1206]

Thank you for your presentation and your bravery in showing your face to the whole of the world.

[@blinkburrito7101]

resonated so deeply to his story

[@davidjaslow6458]

A breathtaking presentation. You are amazing. You would be a perfect partner for some lucky guy. Dave

[@philiplovings9810]

People NEED TO REALIZE that NOT ALL PRIZES WON are MADE OF GOLD ( etc ) !

[@mnarmstrongii]

I love and respect you, my friend ❤

[@arthurcoomes2942]

Wonderful and a remembrance of of sad youth. Yet, uplifting. calm firm and loving STRENGTH

[@tuneaddicted]

Gorgeous man. So brave too

[@jakebe4915]

Find your own God and find your true SELF....You will be happy at the end, trust me. BRAVO PRESENTATION.

[@JosephSgroi]

That someone should go through this journey of shame is the real son. I was raised Roman Catholic and as soon as as I was 18 and went off to college I turned by back on all the nonsense of the church and all religions, as they are all cults. You can be an evolved human without all their manipulative nonsense.

[@袁雷-i1d]

I like this handsome cute boy, and I hope I have a boyfriend like him❤

[@brittneyhaggerty762]

Thank you for sharing your story.

[@auguststudio2707]

Thank you!

[@rickgelb2213]

This man is amazing ❤😊😊😊❤

[@randywatts6969]

None of us chose it!

[@DaRyteJuan]

Learn to meditate and you will discover you stop seeking love and approval from the outside. Love yourself first to set the example. Shame is self-generated.

[@lorenzobianchini4415]

Very well said ❤

[@alexandreweber1024]

God bless you man ❤

[@bonsaijimmy]

I applaud your courage , sympathise with your trauma & congratulate you for being true to yourself. If you were born in Southern Ireland , you will be Catholic. If you were born in Thailand you most probably be Buddhist. I don't believe that you have to be baptised a Christian to go to Heaven. Pope Francisdeclared recently" Homosexuality is NOT a crime". If you were born in Uganda or Zimbabwe, you will be jailed or killed. God loves me & you too !

[@PeBoVision]

By the teachings of your own faith, you are exactly as god wished you to be.

[@David-xm3ph]

First off, you must know that in your faith belief, that God is the creator of life. He created you the way you are. And God is described as perfection. Therefore, the way you are is perfection. Believe in your purity and authentic self and embrace those ideals. Love is love and whom you love is ideal.

[@geronarhu3107]

bless your heart

[@alasdairmacmillan5359]

Bravo

[@campbelllloyd6520]

Well done you.

[@draconiancomments]

This!! ❤❤❤

[@David-ho6mu]

Silence serves no one. ☝️ very true. We have to be “out” …. And they ask why we still need Pride…

[@BERTONI704]

You are so nice man so beautiful ❤❤❤ Un hombre hermoso 😍😍💖

[@BERTONI704]

Fantastico ❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@Spinksreptiles]

You can shame them into being heart broken and pretend there less them… like me… I think I’ll die alone

[@truthhurts986]

Is he still single?

[@psychiatristsarecriminals332]

The idea is to get you to get rid of yourself so straight alpha chad had more room. Get to getting.

[@noopinionslikeswitzerland6966]

I love the Scottish accent, as an American. Such a beautiful voice.

[@edheal3246]

It is an Irish accent BTW

[@PS-ru2ov]

@@edheal3246 its Northern Irish

[@harrycoplin8414]

PLSSSSSS😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[@wardenblack9734]

He is not Scottish! He tells us that he comes from Northern Ireland.

[@robertcaley2671]

The accent is Northern Irish, actually

[@willembissett7223]

🙏

[@brucass93]

💙

[@mattmas32]

❤🧡💛💚💙💜

[@corgiowner436]

Thank you for sharing your very poignant story.

[@samuelgalea7679]

😔

[@coolfix948]

ನನ್ನಿಗಳು ಕರ್ನಾಟಕ ದಿಂದ

[@markreid9499]

Awesome. So uplifting

[@markreid9499]

Awesome...so uplifting

[@coolfix948]

@Alexander thanks , from Karnataka

[@rajaknowles2287]

Deny your self take up your cross and follow me. JESUS JESUS BORE YOUR SHAME. adultery, fornication, are also sins. Dont try to justify sin or expect people to validate it. Confess and ask Hod to free you. Jesus came to set the captives free not to endorse bondage. He who trust in himself is a.fool. The road to life is.Narrow. Stop blaming christians Read the bible. GODS WORD

[@andrewaway]

❤❤