YOU DON'T NEED A HO PHASE, YOU NEED TO HEAL

[@avawilliams5827]

I was a virgin until recently, thought I was so ready to start my ho phase...was really excited about it. First guy turned into an fwb, in the end broke my heart into several pieces. So I learned the hard way that I need to protect myself. Sex is a powerful entity...it can ruin you. I decided I don’t deserve the damage. Now I understand why people wait until marriage. The way I see it sex doesn’t come before love and commitment. Edit: Thanks everyone for your kind comments 💕 it really helps to feel like I have a community.

[@space935]

Wishing you all the best ! He didn’t deserve you...but this things happen so we can find ourselves

[@pynklady11]

I felt this I was a virgin for YEARS until 21. Was ADAMANT about waiting until marriage. Then I got depressed with the market and settled BIG TIME. That was my beginning of the ho phase just accepting any sense of "intimacy" needing to be seen. If I could take it back i would. I'm just now forgiving myself.

[@stellank7931]

From a mother of 2, don’t do it with just anybody.

[@Varaidzo1]

Not to mention the diseases. I personally don't understand the "ho" phase, sex is meant to belong within commitment and should not be brought out of that

[@fruityeva]

Same experience.✌🏼

[@parnaerue]

The ho phase fun until you become aware of how emotionally damaging it is

[@BreenyLee]

💯

[@Lilboweeblet]

💯

[@vintontm]

Facts and it's also spiritually damaging too. Taking people's traumas without knowing. You could be happy mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically. You sleep with some that's depressed without knowing because they know how to mask it. You become depressed and you don't know where it comes from.

[@thixcinikki]

Amen sis 😣💜

[@e11ionore79]

Yea! For me it ended up with depression

[@wilniquehart]

"young choices become adult problems" WHEW.

[@joydanleigh7711]

Be blessed

[@kolaethegreat6752]

Speak honey speak

[@bfree4830]

Come on now 👏

[@sw-hg8eq]

I never had a ho phase in my life and I hate how normalized such things are nowadays. I believe it is an agenda, so women lower their standards and accept everything that is thrown at them. It is sad. Young girls need education on this topic.

[@whocares897]

Exactly! It only caters to men too and women always get the short end of the stick. You’re essentially giving men exactly what they want, nothing empowering about it

[@keumamelanie5602]

Yes! I agree with it as someone who’s in their 20s looking up back to where I was in my teenage years and I regret it so much it’s mentally draining.😫

[@19Hollisterchick90]

I'm 30 and never had it. I literally married the second man I slept with at 25. I don't feel I missed out on anything because I have a great family and I'm taken completely care of. There was no need for me to allow many men into my personal space.

[@sw-hg8eq]

@@keumamelanie5602 The worst part of it is that your market value is the highest in your 20s as a woman. If you don't use those years wisely, men get the best from you cheaply, while you will end up broken later in life. Men however still have a lot of options in their 30s, 40s and even in their 50s, it's the women who lose. We need to focus on ourselves, become the best version of ourselves, then find the right match that will respect us fully and commits to us 100%.

[@sw-hg8eq]

@@19Hollisterchick90 I'm almost jealous but I am happy for you, that sounds beautiful ❤

[@deyad7978]

“I don’t want to get away with what men get away with, men degrade themselves too” GOLD

[@ayodejiajetomobi4528]

👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@Melly16yr10]

Truth 👍

[@kokotzer1210]

🗣🗣🗣 friends with benefits benefits the man A LOT MORE than the woman

[@OriginalCuukee]

Well said Koko

[@KerriganTisdale]

Say it louder!

[@thebenevolentpatriarch424]

How?

[@AlexClementine]

@@thebenevolentpatriarch424 I had the same question.

[@fizahaque]

@@AlexClementine probably because the woman gets attached quicker to the man, especially through intercourse since there is a soul tie being created and basically spiritually you're now connected to the other person. plus most women starting with fwb have minimal to no body count, while the man most likely has a high body count. so basically a woman has more to lose.

[@orange7666]

Know the diffrence between enjoying your youth - and destroying your future

[@candacecasey5634]

Exactly .

[@josie3757]

100% agree

[@sheloves3663]

I prefer a healing season vs a ho3 season. Sexual promiscuity only causes more of that devalued feeling and also makes it hard to connect on an emotional level.

[@joydanleigh7711]

Be blessed

[@minismalls3096]

Had to be celibate for like 2 years to be able to feel again. Weird thing. The hoe phase made me numb for a time, but now I’ve got a ton of love to give so I’m happy I was able to shake that numbness.

[@sheloves3663]

@@minismalls3096 Good for you. We have to protect our bodies and spirits 🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@missfefeloves]

Yes exactly. It makes it hard on an emotional level.

[@maguiedossantos2925]

💯🎯🎯🎯🙏🙏

[@pynklady11]

Its honestly not worth it. That was me YEARS ago with no sense of self and hurting. Loooking for love in all the wrong places it's not worth it honestly. The feeling of being used and low and empty just NO. Just heal baby girl validate YOURSELF.

[@crystalmcknight_]

I can relate. I went through the same thing.

[@spiceupyourcandles]

Thank you for sharing your story, us ladies can learn from this

[@JWW77]

Being used empty and low.....Facts

[@kirah6774]

she gets more beautiful by the day 😮😍

[@jessymorel923]

Right she shows NO SIGNS of aging omigoddddddd 😻😻

[@bridgettedavenport8960]

She is absolutely stunning 👌

[@Daejaskyy]

@@jessymorel923 said

[@caileepolanski1779]

Just when you think she couldn't possibly get any prettier.. she never fails! 😍

[@gabbyslittleworlddd.5440]

Honestly 😻😻

[@avery3741]

This video needs to play as a PSA before every music video, hollywood movie, and every time you open up instagram.

[@jemimajanvier4706]

Speak on it❣️

[@toriyt2714]

Yes! It’s everywhere it’s sad

[@AmalAuma]

💯💯💯

[@dawiiffa7280]

so true

[@LY-js7ff]

SO many girls I talked to, told me I‘m gonna regret giving my virginity away to anyone, they all told me the same that they felt dirty and empty after it

[@avawilliams5827]

Dirty and empty...those are the words.

[@oftenunsaid2175]

I did && especially when you thought the guy you lost it to really liked you after I lost it my heart broke and I felt disgusting

[@alicephoenixpoetryjournal9062]

Facts.

[@deeknits]

Dirty, empty and USED.

[@addistimez8760]

Absolutely. God is the wisest, He knows what is ultimately the best thing for us. That is why He designed sex to be in the context of a marriage He ordained between a man and woman who love and care about each other. Trust in God and pray for Him to show you who He has chosen for you. He is faithful and loves to be involved in His children's lives. :)

[@lexielovingu206]

To ALL MY VIRGINS : PLEASE WAIT TIL MARRIAGE CAUSE IT"S NOT WORTH GIVING IT TO SOMEONE THAT DOESN'T LOVE YOU!!!

[@Sandrinarhonda]

I AGREE WITH YOUUUUU!! I’M 19 & I’M WAITING!

[@Irisgentle]

@@chidinmaorie7700 Honey if a man loves you, he will put a ring on your finger. Thats it. It really is that simple.

[@Irisgentle]

@@chidinmaorie7700 Thats why properly vetting a man is important. "For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of." Luke 6:45. People tell on themselves 24/7, thats why its important for him to talk, and you to listen. Strengthen your relationship with God. I have dreams when something isnt right and God prepares me for it. Trust that God will not lead you astray.

[@Irisgentle]

@@chidinmaorie7700 Your very welcome. I can understand where your coming from. Honestly therapy and inner self work helped with those feelings. Your on the right path! Your watching these videos to better yourself👏🏾 Congratulate yourself at every step! Life coaching can also be helpful with pointing you in the right direction. The best part about youtube is its free healing. Take advantage of that, wherever you need guidance find a channel that aligns with what you need. Remember the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.

[@chidinmaorie7700]

@@Irisgentle thank you so much..I wish I can communicate with u more often..but I really appreciate everything thank u

[@sharonszn]

Thank you so much for this video I feel like there is so much pressure to be sexual and promiscuous in our society

[@19Hollisterchick90]

There is so much pressure for younger girls and women. Not even just from men anymore. There's now women who actively tell women to go through it, yet almost all of these women have nothing much at their big age going on.

[@sharonszn]

@@19Hollisterchick90THIS !! I have experienced this a lot and it made me doubt my values and wether I was even doing life right.

[@NishaRae11]

@@19Hollisterchick90 yes ma’am, was just coming here to say that

[@JoE-wd8qh]

I feel the same way! I ask myself do I need to post pictures of myself in lingerie or half naked to be sexual or get attention ? I see naked pictures everywhere

[@addistimez8760]

You are right. The world is fallen, so what is wrong is portrayed as right in order to deceive and mislead people. God tells us that the right road is narrow. "Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it." -Matthew 7:13. But if we focus on Him and His abundant love for us, we get the confidence to live life with confidence and conviction. :)

[@zairebellamy7146]

I went through that phase as a teen looking for love in the wrong places it wasn’t worth it. As an adult with a more stable sense of self and mind it was actually damaging to me physically with my reputation and mentally with my self worth. It’s not necessary!

[@bridgettedavenport8960]

Life of Zai.. I hear you sis.. my childhood abuse led me down some dark paths in my 20’s looking for love in the wrong places, we live and we learn.. hope you have a beautiful fulfilled future ahead xx

[@zairebellamy7146]

That’s my story too but I’m picking up my pieces!

[@demimiller8437]

Yes girl I never went through that phase but my friend did and she tried to make me feel bad because I wanted to save myself for someone special, I was definitely more mentally mature than her thank god, but let's just say she wanted to commit suicide, videos of her was passed around, when we went out the neighborhood Boys would call her out of her name, and in school they referred to her as "blank big hoe" she acted as if none of this bothered her and I was her true friend through it all I never told her I told you so, but happily today she's not that same person. I knew she just was terribly insecure.

[@shutit4024]

@@demimiller8437 I think she might have went through some things as a child, honestly guys are immature asf

[@dawn2daylightmadness]

Breeny I swear you are a mind reader because the other day I went out with some girls and they were trying to pressure me into having sex with this random guy we met at a restaurant. They were all in relationships (I’m not) and they were like “you HAVE to have a hoe phase” and yada yada and I was like “no TF I don’t”. The same girls had the nerve to look at me side ways when I said I want a man who will actually take the time to take me out and pay for things. Lord the bar is so low these days, but thank you for your videos they always come on time 💕

[@LY-js7ff]

sry but tf is wrong with ur friends

[@dawn2daylightmadness]

@@LY-js7ff they weren’t my friends, they were friends of a friend. It’s funny cause if I had actually jumped and had sex with they man you can bet they would be calling me everything but a child of god 🙄🙄

[@sweetpea6230]

That’s smart of you!

[@Sandrinarhonda]

@@dawn2daylightmadness girlll you needa throw those mutual friends away. Idk why they were tryna encourage you to go through what they went through. Disgusting.

[@space935]

I’m proud of u! Don’t let anyone pressure u to do something u don’t want to do! Plus you hold yourself in high regards and that probably hit a nerve with them bc they didn’t hold themselves to those same regards when they had a “ho phase”

[@SS-cu8se]

I only experienced sex when I got married. My heart really goes out to women who engage in sexual intercourse with men who do not fully love them/have no commitment to them. Because after experiencing the “deed”, if I had sex with a guy and he left me after, I would be absolutely devastated. It’s such an intimate act. I’m confused why casual sex has been normalized, there’s a lot at stake. You are sharing the most intimate part of you with someone. That’s not something to take lightly. But those are just my thoughts.

[@addistimez8760]

So totally agree!

[@SS-cu8se]

@yourwhatif I agree, it’s definitely the media. But we forget that the movies/tv shows these industries put out are fiction. It’s really a shame that our influences influence us to do things that could harm us.

[@Elizabeth-mf3dn]

Same, my heart would be in shambles

[@Laure_Travels]

Facts!!

[@Z4U3398]

Don't blame the media, don't buckle to stupid social "norms." Instead, introspect one's own heart: Life is not about what you could get more of. It's about *not* losing more of yourself for what little you get in exchange. After all, what is there for you at the end of the road when whatever is left of you barely remains?

[@123CREATIONS]

LISTEN HERE LINDA!!!! YOU ARE SO RIGHT! I AM 31 YEARS OLD AND STILL A VIRGIN AND PROUD. IM WAITING UNTIL MARRIAGE! I DONT AGREE WITH THAT WHOLE STUPID HO PHASE GARBAGE!

[@AboveRubiesTV]

Facts!!

[@ambomateijennifer7207]

Great

[@flyandshy00]

You shouldn't tell men that you're abstaining until marriage though, otherwise they will bounce. Because it's a natural turn off, a man needs to fall in love with you first to agree with that, that would take months if not years.

[@chamomiletea906]

@@flyandshy00 but how can i make him wait until marriage without directly telling him that i'm staying abstinent until then?

[@AboveRubiesTV]

@@flyandshy00 I don’t agree. If a man is not going to wait, then good! Weed them out early on. You’d have to tell him at some point because he will want to be intimate. Whether it’s a turn off or not, a man’s ego shouldn’t be catered to out of fear of losing him. Cause the truth is, both men and women should be abstaining until marriage.

[@VivvyAsmr]

Honestly feel like I traumatized myself during my ho phase. Looking back I regret a lot and hate how it’s seen and synonymous with female empowerment. You don’t have to be hypersexual in order to be a liberated woman.

[@historiqueafricaine]

Thanks for your honesty not many people will say it as it is

[@Sandrinarhonda]

THANK YOUUUU. they're basically accepting becoming unpaid escorts and prostitutes both in real life and digital.

[@tiahnarodriguez3809]

I hate how being a ho has become synonymous with being promiscuous and objectifying yourself. All this has done is created broken people with self-esteem issues.

[@harrisre-nee3017]

"The ho phase is a reflection of brokenness, not freedom." Brilliant!!💫

[@MsLong94]

Music has a lot to do with this “ho phase” they’re making music to target the sacral & root chakra. You look gorgeous btw!

[@miamystical]

This is very true!! After listening to certain rap or music in general, I feel very charged up sexually

[@user-xd7ql8of7b]

This is the first time I’m hearing about this and that’s crazyyy 🤯

[@miamystical]

@@user-xd7ql8of7b they literally tune the music into certain frequencies that affect your chakras and mood 😭 jhene aiko says she tunes her music into frequencies that affect the heart and makes you calm and that's why her music relaxes you as well and she uses a myriad of other instruments in the background that induce relaxation

[@user-xd7ql8of7b]

@@miamystical that explains why her music is so calm 😂

[@SJ_Vibezz]

So true

[@ThePrayerfulBride]

I went through this phase as a teenager. I didn’t have a model of what love was as a child. I let boys take advantage of me / blackmail me in to sexual acts. I’m 24 and it is NOT necessary spend that time focusing on yourself . Healing from childhood trauma, learning who you are, etc.

[@addistimez8760]

Absolutely, healing is the word here! God bless you!

[@YouTubeaccountj]

So happy I didn’t make the mistake of exposing myself to the internet forever

[@LY-js7ff]

u‘re lucky

[@sixteen.candles.4644]

Right

[@jessesotheysay]

Same

[@shutit4024]

Same

[@Melly16yr10]

Same here 😄

[@theapexpredator157]

I'm at a loss at how anyone would ever think that having such a phase would ever be okay...

[@ahtianao6678]

I'm still a virgin and I'm not the type to sleep around with people. If I'm gonna sleep with somebody, it's gonna be with somebody that I love, everything is mutual, and I completely trust that person. Ladies and gents, please heal and protect yourself. Getting heartbroken, being attached to somebody that don't feel the same way etc etc isn't worth it.

[@Sandrinarhonda]

PREACH!!

[@addistimez8760]

Yess!

[@jas2beinspired146]

The ho phase is not worth it. You don’t know what people got!! Stay safe and healthy.. focus on your goals !! You will feel 100% better about your life and yourself!!

[@MariaMaria-ir9dr]

I am that girl who went through the ho phase some time ago, I am not ashamed to say that in the comment section. I can confirm that everything that was said on the video is true. Sleeping around is destructive, it lowered my self esteem and the sense of self worth...it took me muuuuuuch time to restore my self esteem after such "free love". GIRLS IT DOESNT BENEFIT YOU AT ALL! Now I feel whole again and I'm happily married but I just want to warn you don't follow what media and society tells you, don't destroy your soul, don't give your body to someone who'll never appreciate it. I apologise for my English mistakes, it's not my native language 😄

[@norbatdepaname]

Thanks for you honesty

[@albo-king3038]

🤫

[@JWW77]

I regret taking crumbs in order to fill a void... I regret giving parts of myself in exchange of moments that felt like I was wanted cared for and loved 😔 I'm tired and fed up. This video helps tremendously.

[@ChristManifestee316]

She said “you settle because deep down and side you don’t believe you will get what you really want.” I’ve never had that phase but I definitely had that feeling. I’m gonna raise my faith and my standards!

[@Eyeyana3]

““I am not trying to be conformed by the way of the world. I am trying to be transformed by the renewing of my mind” THAT. THANK YOU.

[@canadixo]

I hope this video reaches every female who is settling, lowering her standards & lying to herself and these men about what she wants.

[@Laure_Travels]

1.I'm a single mom of 2 and i literally get hit on all the time it's annoying 😒 I try to use my kids to run guys off but it doesn't work. 2.Good quality men are hard to find because of easily available sex from other women. 3.I been celibate for 3 years and cut off all 2 soul ties .its been wonderful I can focus on my kids and myself. Your video was very helpful for me to continue my celibacy.

[@priyachithra2829]

You are a real Queen❤

[@JWW77]

Thats exactly where I aim to be cut off all Ties and focus on me and the kids again I gave "dating" a chance and it caused me more pain/problems than being alone 😔

[@Flyingtaco82]

I was just like you. Stay strong!

[@addistimez8760]

Keep raising and protecting your precious babies and praying for the right one. God is faithful, pray for Him to give you the wisdom know who He has chosen for you and keep the wrong ones away. He loves being involved in His children's lives. The right one who loves and fears God will be on the same page to wait along with you until marriage. xo :)

[@Laure_Travels]

@@addistimez8760 thats sounds great but I'm no longer interested in marriage or male relationships unless its strictly work related.

[@TheAlkebulanTrust]

Facts upon facts. That's all. This needed to said and talked about.

[@sarahmicro]

Thanks God I never had this ho phase and I refuse to go down to this level . I am 37 and for God , I choose to never have sex before marriage. I am still single and happy . So keep in mind that everything is in Your head and self confidence as well.

[@addistimez8760]

Absolutely!

[@squeaksqueaken2639]

A real woman of God. 🙏🏽 this is so rare these days, you’re like a breath of fresh air in a polluted world.

[@melybellyful]

Last night i was thinking of all the experiences i had with men from teens to age of 28. I realized it was all just sexual. I craved love so much i degraded myself for years.the only way i knew to have male attention was to be sexual.. my spirit was so broken and had constant mental breakdowns not realizing that it was part of the reason i was feeling so down. We are biologically different to men and mentally our hormones want us to bond with every sexual tie.

[@addistimez8760]

It's about the growth! For a lot of us, we first have to realize our worth and value in God, as being loved by God so passionately. Knowing that is so life changing. Then no one can shake us. Again, it's all about growth! xo :)

[@LoveMiaStuff]

Once again right on time for me. Sometimes I feel like I’m not living my life or enjoying my youth because of my lack of experience in that area. But there are so much better things to be doing that could be so much more fulfilling.

[@montaiju]

This video came right on time for me. I'm 25, never had a hoe phase & I've caught myself feeling guilty. I thought it was always a right of passage or something, and I was behind..But all honestly I'm just not built for it, my feelings get hurt easily !! lol

[@newestbarbee3250]

Same sis . I felt as if it affected my worth

[@addistimez8760]

29 here and no guilt whatsoever. No one is going to make me feel some type of way for THIERR own issues with that "right of passage" crap. Honoring God and waiting until marriage, God honors back!

[@Elizabeth-mf3dn]

Same - never had a hoe phase and I’m 26, but I don’t care because what I really want is a relationship with someone who loves me and impresses me

[@LatifTakeAction]

You on the right path a good guy will wife u one day

[@babyc.3015]

Omg girl same. I'm 25 too 😔

[@FK-zp2fp]

I ain’t gonna lie, I’m going through this “” phase. Thank you I needed this!

[@Sandrinarhonda]

then whyyyy are you here????

[@addistimez8760]

Sometimes God sends people (even virtually lol) to help us wake up. It's wonderful that you saw this at the right time! :)

[@porcelainslane7391]

it’s so sad that it’s being glamorized on TikTok and Instagram. Like the silhouette challenge challenge is so “body positive” and “liberating” but they’re not. These women are becoming prey. They are showing what’s special and meant for one deserving person to EVERYBODY.... who don’t deserve it! And if someone wants to chalk it up to self-love.... that’s something to be done in front of a mirror so YOU can appreciate YOU and putting it on the internet for external validation is the opposite of self-love. Nothing is special anymore and I wouldn’t care what fellow women did with their bodies if it didn’t effect me, but it does.

[@merrielemaitre7509]

I don’t think showing your body is the same as having a hoe phase in any way. You can wear revealing things and be a virgin. 🤷🏽‍♀️

[@Sandrinarhonda]

@Lana Bs AGREED! I had to delete the app because I kept getting sexual things on my for you page .

[@addistimez8760]

​@@merrielemaitre7509 True, but in my opinion, from a practical perspective, it is denying human nature to think that walking around half naked is not going to make someone think sexual thoughts and also make us look at ourselves more as just sexual objects. It is not by accident that the increase in the over-sexualized images, talks and ideals we see in the medial and social media are happening at the same time as a ridiculously promiscuous culture. I think one inevitably promotes the other unfortunately. I feel bad for this generation of kids who see nothing but sexual talk, images and ideals on TV.

[@addistimez8760]

@Lana Bs Super toxic indeed

[@kiera6326]

It’s just a body. It’s not the women’s fault their bodies are so oversexualised.

[@awandezwane1500]

LOVE THIS Breeny! Everything you said about the unspoken pains of the h** phase is so true! I could relate to everything. Sometimes the h-phase is like an adrenaline rush, you can go and go and go, then only once you've stopped you realise that you have hurt or exhausted yourself. I am in awe of how God has transformed my heart since becoming abstinent. I was also on Team "I don't wanna get married" but in all honesty that was just a false consolation cause I didn't think I could get a man without sex. The only sexual liberation is when you are married and can have sex without regrets, without wondering if he'll call back and especially without having to pretend you're not attached. Thanks for this amazing video!

[@addistimez8760]

That is wonderful to read. God is truly amazing and transforms our hearts in such beautiful ways!

[@jjdieselcowboytraveler79sm71]

I'm 41 years old. I'm very thankful to God Almighty for protection from STDs unplanned babies.

[@naveidahuggins8697]

Thank you for speaking the truth. Social media and all these “trends” are hurting us more than we know.

[@Flavoredwaterr]

"your only hurting yourself". Yes! And the part where you said that it is a pattern of regret and feeling unsure. You hit the nail on the head. I really needed this today. Ive been single for a yr and a half and would really like to learn to not entertain people that dont match my vibration.

[@melissagitts]

You could also suffer the same consequences and hurt/pain of being in a ho phase just as being in a r/ship with a wrong partner. How insane!

[@FashAveGirl]

Yes! Bc I didn’t have a ho phase but I surely had a bad partner that I’m still healing from.

[@melissagitts]

@@FashAveGirl heal easy love,❤️

[@Elizabeth-mf3dn]

Exactly, I’d go insane

[@ashafreeman9690]

Huh

[@communitysolutionspro1520]

This is a whole word. In the 90s I worked with sex workers with HIV. Let me tell you its traumatizing to female body to have a lot of partners. In most of my 20s I was celibate and it clears your mind. No soul ties. I understand why God has so many instructions for this part of our journey. Sharing. I tried to tell young ones the only fans was not the way to go. If you pretty enough to get millions of fans why dont you sell make up. But when you bust it wide open now make up brands dont want to be associated. They tell auntie sit down. I dont know what I am talking about.....ok

[@user-pn6qh7nk5q]

I feel sad for all these women caked in makeup and barely any clothes on facebook instagram and all over media. They are so lost and broken seeking external validation from men they dont evem know. Young girls are thinking this is normal and acceptable. Its not. Be classy and respect yourself ladies. You will go along way. Focus on studying and working.

[@ron9403]

You can be classy and going through a casual sex phase at the same time. Appearances have nothing to do with the topic.

[@user-pn6qh7nk5q]

@@ron9403 yes but what you portray to the public is the way you are marketing yourself to others.

[@Sandrinarhonda]

@@user-pn6qh7nk5q EXACTLY!!!

[@demimiller8437]

Studying working and being beautiful

[@missfefeloves]

You got me at seeking attention from men they don't even know and seriously you hit the nail on the head

[@Helloo_oo]

I already liked the video before it even began!! That title did it for me!! Also Breeny, could you do a video on how to be single single, like single and not entertaining anyone and still being confident?!💕 Holding your head high even with no attention or drama around you.

[@emileeheffern]

I am so emotionally broken from my past and part of it was a non intentional ho phase. I searched for love in the wrong places, and now I’m very empty on the inside. Ladies, please don’t do it. This was very very needed. You’re so calming, thank you for your words. It’s what I needed to hear ♥️ ps you are STUNNING

[@brandonyafanaro9710]

Thank you for sharing this message omg I clicked so fast ! I just got left last week . A two year relationship down the train . He moved out and now I’m like “damn now I can have some fun here” but it’s actually hard to even do. No one is worth my body because I lost my love

[@hgjigicon769]

i’m just not going to give myself away because i’m looking for love, i just know someone out there is perfect for me

[@hgjigicon769]

and only me

[@Sandrinarhonda]

Amen

[@ruthvandijk2313]

I didn't have any problems with casual s*x but now I've been in a relationship with a lot of love, and NOW I see the difference and how empty casual s*x is

[@itssilvermadallion]

I thought I needed a hoe phase after the trauma I went through! But all I needed and have is God and prayer! Days and nights I cry. I wake up from nightmares and extremely heartbroken 💔 but I just start praying and asking God to comfort me and heal me. Yesterday my mother came over for Sunday dinner and after we watched a movie I laid In her lap and started to fall asleep. I started to hear her pray for me about everything I’ve vented to her. It took everything in me NOT to cry! She prayed against suicidal, heart broken, healing, making me stronger, depression, saying I’m beautiful. I just wanted to cry all over again because healing has no time stamp. You just gotta go through it! Hoe phase is not what it is..... it does nothing but put bodies on bodies. It’s not worth it! ♥️✋🏽

[@BreenyLee]

🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@addistimez8760]

I'm so glad you know that a "ho phase" is not the answer. I am also glad that you have a mom who is praying for you. God is with you every second of the day, you are so precious to Him. This is a fallen world, but one day we will all be free of its misery. Until then, we continue in faith and God's grace. I will be praying for your healing as well.

[@Elizabeth-mf3dn]

🥺🥺🥺💖💖💖

[@hgjigicon769]

don’t let nobody come in unless you know their intentions are pure, you don’t need no ho phase, there is someone out there that will only love you and only you.

[@fittobethinhappy2bme578]

This is sooooo true!! Know your worth!! Female empowerment suuuussss!! I love this!!

[@kaye5408]

My self esteem must be high because I’ve never chased after a man. No boy ain’t worth my benz punani

[@ggmp1104]

« Benz punani » peeeeeerriaddd🤣

[@dear_cassandra9653]

It's the benz for me😂 and that's on period

[@rasheenas_show1187]

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 this comment just gave me LIFE!

[@alluringher_3203]

And that’s on self worth 💅🏽

[@Sandrinarhonda]

OKAYYYY PERIOD!!

[@kap5571]

I'm 23 and have never had a hoe phase, and been feeling like I've missed out on an important stage of my young adult life. Thank you for this reassuring video.

[@Thatslaw]

I’m almost 29 and never had one. Ew.

[@Laure_Travels]

Same.... I've been with two people so I guess that's not considered a hoe phase

[@Thatslaw]

@@Laure_Travels That’s a good number. Ive had 3 partners. Wish it were 0, but 3 is good.

[@shutit4024]

@@Laure_Travels I been with 5 guys and my best friend been with 9 guys I guess we had our “h0 phase “ only one was a relationship with me

[@Laure_Travels]

@@shutit4024 i think if you've been with over 5 its considered a ho phase so your good...lol 😆

[@shutit4024]

@@Laure_Travels haha thanks but where I’m from if you have over 1 body you’re considered “ran through”

[@yangosakurai7505]

It's always refreshing to see people teaching the younger generation good morals, both males or females. It's sad that it's so rare these days but all the more reason to support this type of message

[@frimunya]

Breeny YOU ALWAYS SPEAK THE TRUTH, GOD BLESS YOU !!!

[@CeceLove08]

I am the 'virgin' you were talking about near the begging/middle of the video and I agree 100%! You always know just what to say breeny

[@Sandrinarhonda]

Why you put it in quotes?

[@candacecasey5634]

@@Sandrinarhonda why do you care?

[@user-pn6qh7nk5q]

100% ...great advice.. esp to young girls and boys actually. I am waiting till marriage even if thats ages from now thats ok... my body is my temple.. sacred and mine to protect.💟

[@ljmotivate4u680]

Lack of role model who showed self worth it's became a way to validate oneself. The more you do give away the less the value run down because people are used to getting and seeing free or exchange of give and take. Increase of sadness increase of not feeling wordy.

[@sunshyn1825]

I'm about to cry...i'm a virgin and 17 and feel like I'm behind and wasting my youth. Thank you for this ❤

[@chiyy.4460]

Please please please be careful with your body it is our temple darling I’m a 20 yr old woman who lost her virginity at 19 was absolutely disgusted and haven’t had sex since , just be careful

[@sunshyn1825]

@chiyy.4460 I will thank you for the advice 🩷 definitely felt my spirit wavering

[@BONEDADDYFILMS]

I have had people made me feel guilty for not wanting sex, especially not wanting to be in a the "phase". People would try to tell me I was asexual, or made feel like I was missing out. It was worse when I was a virgin because I did not want to have sex AND especially lose my virginity to some hookup. It was also worse when I was a virgin because my virginity was a target for men to prey on. Being spiritual, I definitely do believe there’s an energy exchange when you have sex with someone. So, in order to protect myself and my energy ive always stayed away. Seeing this video just gave me reassurance for the way I’ve felt for years, and I’m so glad I never gave into to what I like to call it the "hookup Culture". Don’t get me wrong I love when women feel empowered, but I hate seeing them allowing/ having men to use them and abuse them then telling the world it’s okay because of the few benefits they’ve gain.

[@Lalalanddddd]

You are the big sis I never had!!! You helped getting my self esteem back and you don’t even know! Lysm ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@Amourd08]

Yes Breeny! So many young women are being misguided by social media about these issues. Thank you for speaking facts and giving good advice!!! 👏🏾🥰💜

[@janehakim7382]

this is no coincidence , God brought me to this video because he knew I needed to here this! thank you so much !!!

[@Bookie1227]

So much truth! Unfortunately so many glamorize the world without consequence.

[@GraciePooh]

I personally don’t want to be with a man that has had a ho phase. It’s just not my thing..not judging

[@xxhshrebyba]

same but most men these days have bodies over 10 :(

[@marieghoullzz5206]

@@xxhshrebyba but want they girl to be classy and submissive 🥺

[@Sandrinarhonda]

@@xxhshrebyba right !!! But there are men that have bodies between 1-4 so that’s not that bad !

[@Sandrinarhonda]

@@marieghoullzz5206 literally

[@shutit4024]

@@xxhshrebyba ha 10 is low they be having bodies over 20-30 but wanna judge women and call them h0s if the woman has less than 10 more than 1 like whattt

[@juanitagabriellle]

thank u for speaking on this

[@nonamesorry7135]

I remember once I was offered a one night stand on a dating app (I'm a gay guy, but your videos help me too, even the ones adressed towards women) and I remember really feeling like "everyone's saying that having sex like that is just really fun, I should try it" so I agreed to this but the dude unfriended me the next day 😂😂😂 to this day I'm REALLY thankful to this random person that he unfriended me lmao, I was actually having really bad anxiety and felt really pressured into doing that, especially that my friends were congratulating me and told me I'm really gonna feel better after having some sex lmao After that one experience I'm 100% sure this is absolutely not for me, I need an emotional connection and trust to feel fully comfortable with someone in that way. I'm really glad that one one night stand didn't work out.

[@chas353]

You go king ! 😊❤️❤️❤️

[@Rere1997_x]

Such a needed video I can definitely relate to this. I wish I saw this video when I was younger but I had to learn the hard way. Please girls don't fall into this trap, wait for someone that will love you and wait till you are ready to lose your virginity to a man that will love you, respect and value you and your body. Otherwise you will regret it.

[@bluwater1422]

I agree

[@benitamurinda7222]

I can honestly say from Experience a ho phase is not worth it at all !!! There is better things you could do with Your time take that time to pray , counselling and exercise HEAL! Happy to say I am healed! But because of my PST mistakes and ho phase it was difficult and a hard journey I hope you all stay blessed and seek healing

[@Sandrinarhonda]

thank you for being honest and not making excuses.

[@ChaseTheLadiesMan]

Totally agree with you 💯. Just because it CAN be done, DOESN'T meant it SHOULD be done. Too many people are focussed on instant gratification and forget long term consequences or gains.

[@egleliis978]

This is why I follow Breeny, she does what she can to PROTECT women whilst every single ‘prominent’ person in the mainstream is telling women to degrade themselves and lose the connection with God situated within everyone’s heart, the soul, in the process. Anyways, big up Breeny, as always!

[@xoxovicky101]

I didn’t have one cause my dad was in the military and I was extremely afraid of him😂 and I’m very paranoid about stds plus my faith in God. Also my parents taught had the talk about boys at an early age with and raised me to love me before any boy

[@ruijackson7697]

Keep at it and dont get discouraged.

[@rafahgalib685]

Lucky you

[@Dilley_G45]

Excellent. This should be spread to all young girls. You're doing a good job! From a man in his 40s

[@islamadil9520]

This video should be sent to Tana Mongeau who teaches young girls to do just that.

[@gabrielaarena7448]

Yeah, strange things are happening nowadays

[@xxhshrebyba]

she’s very weird for promoting that to her audience of young girls

[@brendabrown7130]

One of your BEST and INFORMATIVE videos!!! TRUTH! And OVERDO!

[@TherealHonestgoddess1]

Alot of these women set out to compete with other women to feel better than them. They seek to appear that all the men want them by sleeping with them and all they are is pass around. The men know this and know how to flatter them knowing they have slept around and it becomes a vicious cycle. Also, many men talk worse than women about their escapades ,and tell other men that inturn pursue the easy woman they probably would have bypassed otherwise.

[@Sandrinarhonda]

THANK YOUUUUU!!!! don't become an easy ran through woman, it's not cute.

[@ortros1]

That lady's analysis is spot on ladies! And yes, we as men also lose a fraction of our self worth whenever we increase our "body count" (even though to a lesser extent). So here are my two cents for everybody (men and women): the higher you value yourself, the higher you'll be valued by your surroundings (it's either quality or quantity; you just can't have them both). Cheers!

[@maryuhh89]

It’s very sad about the cycle. I had a friend who cheated on their partner n their partner found out , retaliated n cheated and got aids. BE CARE FUL. so many ppl hide their diseases and pass it along to unsuspecting ppl. Fix yourself , become the person you want to attract! Stay away from broken ppl because hurt ppl hurt ppl.

[@sharrawells831]

“What pattern are you setting up for you future” that checked me real quick !!

[@brazenbtv9223]

I love the raw honesty ! The selling your body for love phrase was so relatable. I literally just subbed and I love it here lol ❤️

[@amaniscott9201]

Know your worth, and demand your worth

[@urfas.1225]

Thank god I never participated in the "hoe" phase although I was very tempted to. I was involved with a guy when I was 19 and it completely ruined me. To this day I thank god that I never had sex with him. I'm 24 now and still a virgin but I honestly have no regrets. I am so glad I waited. My body is only reserved for someone who genuinely loves me and I feel like you should only have sex with someone who you share a connection with and who genuinely loves you. Don't have casual sex. It seems appealing but it can really damage you in the long run.

[@Sandrinarhonda]

AMEN SISTER! I’m so proud of you and hope to follow in your footsteps.

[@sixteen.candles.4644]

I was socially awkward. So my phase started later like 23. I wanted to fit in and also find love and I went about it the wrong way. Im 30 now..my total body count is 5. I have 2 kids now. I dont regret them bc that's the love i was looking for. But even when single and alone i didnt think i was wife material.

[@flyandshy00]

Risk to get pregnant isn't lowered. Parents encourage teenage sex these days. 50% of women are coming for abortion got pregnant on the pill.

[@Elizabeth-mf3dn]

That in itself is horrifying for me, pregnant even though you’re on the pill!? I would die

[@ashafreeman9690]

The pill (when taken correctly) is 98% effective girl. What

[@kiera6326]

Teen pregnancies have significantly decreased within the past thirty years, so yes, actually they have. A lot of the people were conceived on the pill. That doesn’t mean the pill doesn’t work- it means the mother forgot to take it that day, or had a drink around the same time she took it that night and hasn’t realised. Parents do not “encourage” teenage sex these days. Parents instead realise that their teenagers MAY be having sex, and instead of denying it or freaking out like their parents had when all their friends got pregnant, they’re educating them about it and providing protection. It’s not an invitation, but it’s certainly a precaution every decent parent should be offering to their teenager. The result? Less pregnancies.

[@marcellmarselius2307]

Wow!! As a man this gives me a new mindset

[@user-uv6er3dq9p]

I went thru this phase when I was 18-21.. I even rememeber feeling jealous of my friend cuz she had slept with more people than me..I made it my mission to play keep up. I feel so disgusted to think I was ever so deluded. now I get my confidence rejecting men..It's powerful when you actually make a choice rather than settling.

[@edheldude]

So is your confidence or self-worth still tied to the power dynamics you have with other people? After the phase, it's the men who have to settle for you, not you settling for them.

[@nikkibumbum7316]

@@edheldude She has had a mindset change is celebrating how far she's come. I feel like you missed the point of her comment.

[@edheldude]

@@nikkibumbum7316 She can have her emotionally convenient story, the deed is done. She just switched from one dysfunction to another. It's all ego-based and to me it sounds like she didn't learn anything: there's still no love.

[@nikkibumbum7316]

@@edheldude Mkay. I didn't interpret it like that. To each their own.

[@edheldude]

@@nikkibumbum7316 "Now I get my confidence by rejecting men" She still has her ego dependent on external validation but now she just plays power game in her head (probably to cope with her bad choices which she alludes to). That's not a mindset change, it's the same exact mindset with a different strategy.

[@user-yz1lb3cm7z]

I think whenever some thinks about being promiscuous they should watch Tyler Perry’s Temptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor

[@Sandrinarhonda]

What’s it about ?

[@prettyblackgirl1253]

Its about a woman who has only been with man her whole life- her husband. She then falls for this rich guy and ends up cheating with him on her husband until she finds out that the guy she was cheating with had HIV- And a whole load of other issues

[@Sandrinarhonda]

@@prettyblackgirl1253 lord have mercy! I’mma watch.

[@shutit4024]

@@prettyblackgirl1253 and there were red flags too but the woman missed them

[@ashafreeman9690]

That movie is terrible lol. I’m convinced Tyler Perry hates black women

[@avill012]

Breenie, I literally broke down today at church. First time back in a few weeks. I have so much guilt from participating in my first one night stand, I literally know I'm better than this. Can I just say this was a word from God, I find my spirit and my flesh battling hard

[@caralame9893]

Girl I understand exactly what your going through but keep on fighting and praying and read the bible as it will give you advice on what to do in different circumstances.God bless you and I hope you know your not alone I’m also fighting the flesh and i mistakes but God knows I’m trying and that’s all he asks “Whoever tries to live right and be loyal finds life,success and honour “

[@misskemo]

Been through this phase of guilt it’s not easy , but you have to accept God’s forgiveness. Be encouraged that you on the right path and things will get easier. God bless ❤️

[@frimunya]

Decided to go celibate exactly 12 months ago , best decision of my life.

[@foreverapril5930]

Abstinence is when you voluntarily or involuntarily not have sex for an extended period of time or until marriage. Celibately is more of a vow to not have sex at during your lifetime. Mostly priest or nuns take this vow. And even a few of the profits in the Bible.

[@hgjigicon769]

There will be that one guy who will love me unconditionally, can’t name who but have faith

[@aliciaa4333]

This is why I love Breeny. Straight FACTS!!!

[@meivx]

one of the best videos ive watched in a while

[@Bantu_woman]

Well, the last past “ mess up the market for others?” Then don’t play the game. I always hear that, bores me to think about it. Why should I worry about my competitors and what they’re doing. I value and love myself, I higher my standards because it is who I am, being myself, knowing what I want puts me in a higher position of being with a man of QUALITY. I mean why would I want a man who wants something cheap, a high quality man buys quality Bree “drops mic”.

[@freedomtownn]

This was so important. I always feel pressured to be more "sexual", so I just end up avoiding relationships because I'm so scared of such an expectation! I just do not feel ready at all! But it seems to be becoming the norm. :/