You Should Submit to Your Spouse

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Dr. Jordan B. Peterson is asked why the submission of a woman to a man in marriage is now societally repulsive. Peterson explains that the word itself, "submission," is often likened to slavery and other adverse terms, which leads to rather crude arguments both for and against its use. That said, the best marital partnership and the axiomatic ideals therein should not be seen as repulsive, and so we still have a societal problem, regardless of the descriptor used.
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[@_tndn]

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" The responsibility on the man has a lot of gravity as well. Men are supposed to be self-sacrificial in regards to their wife in the same way Christ died on the cross for the Church. The man's role in this relationship is no joke.

[@genebruce6321]

Lots of men have ignored that part of those verses. They like the 'submission' thing though.

[@_tndn]

@@genebruce6321 thats why women shouldn't pick buffoons. You need someone you can trust during a 9 month period of vulnerability and for life. Find a God fearing man

[@kevinkelly2162]

Didn't he die for the sins of the world?

[@jesseleighbrackstone8365]

Bingo!🙏🏻♥️🙏🏻

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

Men are supposed to be many things bur fall short

[@MeeCee5204]

"Hey Jordan, what do you want for breakfast?" "Well, first we need to define breakfast...." lol, love this man 😂❤😂

[@Jmacdonald2386]

😂 that’s hilarious and totally pictured that scenario! If you haven’t seen them already, search for Jordan Peterson impressions on KZbin, there’s some hilarious ones that are spot on! Figured you might be interested if you enjoy imagining him speaking about every day things or topics that we will most likely never hear him really speaking about, those impressions really are great

[@8dreamersfarm]

90% of my husband’s frustrations with me are because he first doesn’t even try to understand what I’m saying. He leans on his assumption of what he thinks I’m saying. We’re still happily married, but communication is a strength of mine and he can benefit from a broader perspective and desire to actually listen. When he was getting super frustrated with an idea we were working through, I suggested we go draw it out on a white board. When we were ready, I suggested we start with a prayer. The discussion went much better, even though we both still wanted different things, we could see the pros and cons to the idea we each had. We ultimately found a solution and made progress in our communication.

[@austinjon31]

"now... That's a good question... Because you see..."

[@EscapeTheMatrixRightNow]

Let's define 'want'

[@aa-ze5cz]

@@8dreamersfarm Maybe communication isn't a strength of yours and you need to communicate more clearly?

[@ayonalovecoaching]

My man has my best interest at heart. Often more so than what I would do for myself. He looks after us very well. I am grateful every night just to hear him breath beside me.

[@chillie000]

How long have you been together?

[@bethanyboothe4817]

I am a married Christian woman (7 years) and grew up in church where submission was taught. I’ve always wondered if I’m “doing it right” as I feel like an equal collaborative partner in my marriage which is not necessarily how I’ve heard submission described from the pulpit. I really resonate with the “beneficial adversary” term because my relationship with my husband has always been one of mutual, respectful challenge toward one another. He’s not a demanding man and serves me every single day! Our relationship is great, so maybe we’re doing marriage right and submission doesn’t feel hard when you have loving counterpart. If anything I feel we both at various times choose to lose (or submit) in the moment so that the relationship can win, therefore even in our “losing” we still win.

[@STak-ju7gx]

Not married but love thinking, researching, and nusing upon these concepts. Similarly, my church community preaches submission, and it always aggravated me as I was growing up. the older ladies will use the submission thing and being a lady to always excuse everything the guys did and make it the girl's fault despite how much hurt I already felt and coming to report it. So you can tell I grew up thinking it's unjust to create an equally sentient being and doom that being to an existence of powerlessness against the wrongs of another terribly imperfect being. Anyways, as I grew and started to look into it, the Bible does have a balance with the order of submission. The husband submits to Christ, and the wife submits to the husband. Now the husband is submitted to Christ based on love, the Love that Christ had that He gave up Himself for the Church, even with her terrible imperfections. This same kind of love is the Love the Husband ought to have towards the wife, one that so easily gives oneself up for the other. Alot of power hungry and ego centered men, like to limit the interpretation of that giving up of self, to providing security and taking a bullet should the slim chance occur. But giving up oneself is similar to denying oneself to follow Christ. It means He the husband doesn't insist on His own way, but be fullying following Christ and be counseled by Christ's way as well as be considerate to the wife. God's ordination it's not for one to dominate the other. From what I understand, it serves the purpose of also dealing with one of the major poisons of sin in us. The original, original sin of pride that led to lucifer's rebellion. Ego and constantly seeking to be on top, to be dominant, seeking to be in control, to have ones way, etc. Are all features of pride. God didn't ordain this order so men can grow their pride, this order is for all to be subject to God. I think your example sort of shows this. Your husband doesn't seem to be too obsessed with ego and being in control and creating rigid boxes to fit you in. He simply is leading you with love and somehow knows that sometimes, He must give himself up to be a good leader and representative of Christ in your marriage. Of course its easy to submit to love. Who wouldn't? So far, in practice, I have yet to see couples who are so stuck up with traditional interpretations of submission that are truly happy. Most happy couples I have seen, both are so caring and considerate of each other and the women come off as partners, not someone subject to another. You may correct me if I am wrong in this assessment, but I believe it very close to correct. God loves both genders equally, and He wouldn't place an order that puts an unchecked fallible man over another who is required to be subject and powerless.

[@Timblisi]

It seems to me you've explained it better than almost anyone I've ever heard or seen. I think you are certainly "doing it right."

[@lukeshioshio]

You're doing it perfectly in my opinion. Submission doesn't mean someone has to dominate the other. You submit to each other's needs.

[@garryrichardson4572]

That’s beautiful. As Paul put it “ submit to one another in reverence to Christ “.

[@carollen5633]

Compatibility is the key. When two people are from different cultures and different religions it's more difficult. There are so many factors, I decided not to marry again.

[@Tom-tk3du]

My late wife and I had what I would consider a perfect marriage, as good as one could ever hope for in life. There were three parties to our marriage...she, me and "WE". We were each our own selves, but everything we did was in the service of the joint WE, which always benefited the both of us equally. It all came very naturally..we didn't really try to analyze it. It was basically what Jordan is talking about, but perhaps my choice of words is not as articulate as Jordan's. It's a remarkable thing, if you're fortunate enough to ever find yourself in such a relationship.

[@bethanyboothe4817]

I feel the same way about my marriage to my husband. I sometimes wonder if I’m “doing submission” correctly, (and even now I can’t really say for sure if I am) but I look at our happy marriage and I think I must be in the ballpark, because I couldn’t ask for much better marriage.

[@bruhgh609]

Your comment hit me pretty hard. My fiance always says "We". I love that woman dearly

[@marencruickshank]

❤

[@pegasus5287]

You said that beautifully well

[@Rp-wt7uz]

This is literally like the Bible teaching 'the two shall become one flesh'! It's crazy seeing situations of Biblical application and realising that God's way really is good

[@AwokenEntertainment]

the submission of maturity - not doing today what will damage you and your partner tomorrow in pursuit of achieving higher goals together

[@stephenparker5241]

You have just explained something that I have always known but not fully understood in a technical sense. I've always thought that I was punching above my weight with my partner, but when asked she would say it was the other way around, but we both agree that being together makes us both better than we were as an individual. We have been together for 25 years since our late teens. My only real worry in life is coping with the loss of her not being around any longer but that is all part of the journey of life I suppose.

[@gracegwozdz8185]

Stephen Parker congratulation on your long-lasting harmonious relationship! You are not alone....in the worry to lose your partner. We all do, especially if we've already suffered such a profound loss. C'est la vie.

[@chillie000]

Could I ask, do you still have a good sex life? Sorry if that’s out of line…

[@stoneyascension7250]

I must agree that this is one of the best understandings of submission in a marriage I've come across after going through theological training while working as a church pastor, now retired, and 51 years of marriage. JP, his wife, and their children are wonderful. A true blessing in a time of need for our world. The flaws of the family are what make them so real. There are no perfect people; we are all flawed in some way. What I like about JP and his family is that you get exactly what you see. There is no pretense of being perfect by them. There was only one perfect man, and he was crucified on a Roman cross.

[@jeusmarcomascarina4102]

Always remember love is commitment and not comfort or desire.

[@katarinas6012]

except he could never become who he is without his wife making all the career sacrifices...

[@Daniela-pr7rz]

Why are they all tainted with depression and all the problems related if they're such a perfect family?

[@jeusmarcomascarina4102]

@@Daniela-pr7rz because that is reality even the best you know failed too. But at least they understand.

[@anonymity11]

There's a simpler answer to the question provided. It's because women will not allow it otherwise. They want the man to lead, no matter how much the the feminist harpies will screech otherwise. And the man is happier when he is in the leadership role as well. Men do not like to feel like they are emasculated, so the dynamic wouldn't work any other way. So it's really women who set this standard. And when the submission is voluntary, because nobody is forcing the woman to submit, then it becomes a true happy relationship which mutually benefits both sides.

[@brittanynovais1489]

I submit to my husband because he loves me well. I submit to my husband because I trust him with my very life. I believe in the depths of my soul that my husband will always choose what benefits our family, which in turn benefits me. He is provider, protector, partner, lover…. And he takes all of these roles seriously. He takes great pride in his family, and I in him. My submissiveness has never left me lacking.

[@bnez1302]

Bless him, and you.

[@zaram131]

Good for you…

[@mikelp72]

What if you disagree with him someday, on something very important and something you feel strongly about? Does your submission only go so far as you agree with him and believe in him?

[@hzlkelly]

You ought to submit without conditions 😅

[@mycrazylife408]

Men are more logical women tend to be more emotional. Men are the protector and provider so naturally he’s going to be the team captain or leader. That’s why the women submits to him. It’s politically incorrect to tell it how it is though.

[@staynalive660]

I wish this “beneficial adversary” concept would be taught far and wide. It takes love to want to put it into practice.

[@acacia_w]

I like it too. Never heard of this before but it's helpful. It's like, "the one who holds you to account." And that's useful in a partnership also to be a better version of oneself.

[@SuperGddgd]

I just stumbled upon this amazing peterson talk, as a Hebrew speaker, it is "Ezer KeNegdo" which translates to something like "a help against him", pretty sure Ben Shapiro talked about it

[@smokingcrab2290]

No adversary is beneficial.

[@hzlkelly]

I woke up at midnight last night, I was anguished about marriage, hadn’t fought or anything with my husband. But I felt so heavy so I went to pray. I asked God to help me submit to my husband not that I’m not but I’ve been holding back to full submission. God made me realise that love is really not feelings but our proactive choice to always put our partner first. Selflessness. This is hard but yet rewarding.

[@craterous]

Would it help you to understand that your submission is a role model for his submission to God? One of our first mission fields is our spouse, to help them in their walk. (In return he is directed to love and sacrifice for you, in a sense -----submission. He basically role models Jesus love to you as best he can -- both for your sake and his own understanding of God's love for him. The proceess here is mutual.) Your comment on Love: My definition of "LOVE" is --- seeing someone as God sees them. (Which your comment gets at.)

[@tanakamawere]

May the Lord be with you and your marriage

[@smokingcrab2290]

Why are your feelings so vexxed? Are you not getting any connection?

[@boijaden123]

In a relationship you both communicate and cooperate because you both want the relationship to be healthy and last as long as possible. Both parties should be willing to change themselves in service of the relationship. With good communication, you can understand what the other person is annoyed about, for example, and you can try your best to not do that thing.

[@user-ls2uq3pv1h]

Well said!

[@watsons4233]

If your in a relationship, you are in a ship. There can only be one captain of a vessel. 2 captains is chaos.

[@Bee71234]

​@@watsons4233 Yes when the husband is in God , but sometimes the woman is much more relevant to be chef

[@thomtermorshuizen3219]

No, i think it's more like you are both the captain of your own ship. You shouldn't change yourself. But i think you should get as close to your true most authentic self as possible. That creates the polarity and excitement. The love then keeps going. Love and relationships go very very deep.

[@jtjones4081]

So you don't believe the Bible commandment "wives, submit to your husbands?" Good for you!

[@protospateras1420]

Simple said: We are all slaves to the duty of the most important. The family. And then be one with other familys for Love, Careness and Survival.

[@christianwoudenberg3393]

Careness?

[@Razear]

When you frame it as "submission," I think most people think that it makes one party subordinate to the other. Compound that with modern day progressivism and you'll understand why it's easily dismissed. Submitting to your partner is mistakenly perceived as elevating one person at the expense of the other and having your partner be inferior. It's a semantic issue more so than one of values.

[@vinceocratic]

Exactly! The word in and of itself is so problematic that you can’t get past it in order to facilitate an understanding of what’s really being said

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

Submission is exactly what people think it is. The women subordinate to the man. Call it what it is. No intelligent woman with self respect wants that

[@SoloRenegade]

leftists are great at changing the meaning of words and terrible with logical reasoning skills and intelligence,

[@STak-ju7gx]

You can't entirely blame progressivism. Growing up in a community were this was taught as part of Christian teaching, people spend an inordinate amount of time stressing submission for women only. And some unfortunate people use it as an excuse to silence women completely. The Bible itself is pretry balanced on submission between husband and wives, but people have a way of perverting things by taking it to an over zealous extreme or the extreme progressivism has taken it to.

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

Christianity is just another means of controlling women. Just another notch in Christianity's bed post of crimes, indiscretions, corruption.

[@callenday6853]

The world ALWAYS leaves out the scriptures where men are commanded to love their wives even to die for them. And the scripture that says the wife's body belongs to the man AND the man's body belongs to the wife... that they have authority over one another. It's not an imbalanced relationship at all as the world constantly tries to shove down everyone's throats off that single verse about submission.

[@echoesofwisdom_]

Exactly!! No one ever talks about the man has to sacrifice even to death for his wife. They just want to misinterpret scriptures to trigger people.

[@avpraeda]

@@echoesofwisdom_ Some very much do, I agree. But unfortunately just as many times I've heard this misinterpretation from priests in my local churches who with their behaviour put this belief to life as well, which is then all the more happily pointed out by the people warring with faith. Wish both sides would be more open to dialogue about the scriptures, there's so much more to them than what most people make it out to be. God bless you

[@TheExtremeCube]

It's mostly perpetuated by ego driven men who just want to rule over someone

[@vibeauxssxuaebiv3489]

They have authority over one another's bodies. The man has authority over the marriage, which he uses to serve the marriage before himself even to death. The wife is to submit so the headship role is clear and because she is to be protected and provided for, not protector and provider, as that doesn't even make sense biologically. In the end, marriage is an institution created By God for the purpose of Respesenting the relationship of Christ and His Church.

[@Anakynblade88]

Thank you, Jordan, for allowing people to hear your train of thought, I gladly listen to any of your conversations on any subject. Sincerly Thank you.

[@fun----]

Great Mr and Mrs Peterson together. Blessings.

[@jcsguitar2506]

Nice to see that there are those that still see value in the lifelong union of a man and woman in a marriage.

[@gracegwozdz8185]

JCS, we are in great majority indeed.

[@jcsguitar2506]

@@gracegwozdz8185 unfortunately true

[@tomaszpaz5189]

There are two quotes about the marriage that I really like and I truly think they are wise and in some way helpful. Perhaps you'll like them aswel. 1. "Love is not a feeling. It's a choice" - if you truly want your marriage/relationship to be healthy, well-organised and fruitful then you literally have to make a choice to love someone. It's not a wild feeling you can't control. A mature love is a way of life you both agreed upon and you both maintain. At least this is how I understand it. 2. "In relationship all the duties should not be divided 50/50. They should be divided 60/40, but both sides should try to be the 60% part" - this one is simple and lovely :)

[@user-ss6ex3uc9j]

WOW the second part profoundly resonates to me. honestly, well-said.

[@thomaslacroix6011]

Your second point rings really true for me, because in a relationship, the probability that either one sees 100% of the tasks to be done is close to zero. So by doing what in your head is slightly more, you do the tasks your partner doesn't see, and your partner does the same, doing the tasks you don't see, which means most of the stuff is done

[@kathycoleman4648]

Yes, those both make sense. Frankly: If husbands put God and wife at the head of their concerns, and women put God and husband at the head of their concerns, a pairing would turn out fine. Where's self, you might ask? We all include self without it requiring a label. Self is the default. Self is why the focus needs to be on God and your loved one.

[@2ndSonofGod]

You cannot make a choice to love someone. That is a dumb statement.

[@johnmarkveldman4415]

​@Son Of God when you have an argument with your wife. You must choose to not put yourself first to absolve the argument. Divorce is at 50% because people choose themselves over love. Love is a choice. My parents have been together for 40 years. They always say love is a choice.

[@clifcody]

"Each of you should jointly submit to the spirit that makes your relationship redemptive and dynamic" (10:20) Brilliant

[@Miossoty1]

Agreed!

[@pianoreigns]

What Spirit ?? Not brilliant. God denying

[@kristopherdecker6549]

People leave out the part where the Bible says submit yourselves one to the other. Ephesians 5: 21-25 I suggest that when people have a problem they read the whole thing, not just pick and choose. Verse 25 says love your wives like Christ loves the church. That means you dang well give yourself for her until there is nothing left when she has need, and then that also extends to your children.

[@ambernichols8603]

Right?! How many tyrannical spouses would give themselves for the other?

[@ethanweber7976]

I completely agree. But that is not necessarily submission on the husbands part.

[@keithmlarsen]

This is why any marriage is a gamble. For peace one must submit to the will of another and hope they feel inclined to do the same a decent percentage of the time.

[@Jcremo]

Literally every single choice you make in life is a gamble. However you can mitigate the chances of loss if you be the spouse your spouse wants to come home to. If both of you make the decision to put the other before yourself your life will flourish.

[@artemissthee3]

Absolutely brilliant. Thank you for enlightening us with what help mate means!

[@kaloncar]

Especially good to see and hear your wife take part in this topic with you.

[@RegineBrady]

Yes!!!! This is sooooo good and Godly!!!!!! Never stop speaking, Jordan!! Continue to be the brave man you are. You’re brave and you’re FULL OF TRUTH. You inspire me more than you could ever know.

[@jonathanweilbacher9714]

I love that!!!!!

[@KD400_]

Do u submit to ur husband as said in the bible

[@RegineBrady]

@@KD400_ yes, of course. That’s at least my strong intention. If not, I’d be a stupid hypocrite for making the comments I have after watching Jordan’s video. 🙄

[@CBarros91]

​@@KD400_Most importantly, do you submit to your wife? Because I see many more men wanting the benefits of women's submission but not wanting to submit to her.

[@ethanweber7976]

@@CBarros91 Well in terms of a biblical view, a Husband is not called to submit to his wife. He is called to love her as Christ loved the church. This means that he dies for her. He sacrifices for her. But there isn't a biblical mandate for a husband to submit to his wife.

[@awakenrae]

I love that he has seemed more interested in the Bible lately and pray for him to get saved if he has not been already!

[@AaronCMounts]

It is very interesting, you bring up this topic. Jordan Peterson is quite well known for having renounced his atheist upbringing and declaring himself a Christian, several years ago.

[@awakenrae]

@@AaronCMounts Oh wow that's great! I didn't not know that thank you!

[@JiraiyaSama86]

As soon as you brought up Ezer, I immediately recalled the conversation you had with Ben Shapiro. It was one of my favorite moments as it was interesting to hear that it meant "a helper against you". Ezer Kenegdo. I had to look it up and it was fascinating. It was also interesting how you brought up that topic where you talked about how to hit the mark more smoothly by having something slightly push against it. Forgot what that concept was called.

[@stephensayedolo]

I've been listening to Jordan Peterson all day since the beginning of this year.... Nothing can ever stop me from listening to him. He has become my role model.

[@Saveg36]

🐑

[@budnrobots2968]

That’s dedication!!

[@RogerABruhn]

You have lots of choices. That’s a good one.

[@chickenmonger123]

There should be things that could stop you. Like if he actually did something horrendous. Nothing is a bad word for what you are saying.

[@WilliamEllison]

I would make Christ your role model, so you are not lead astray.

[@kurtverbaarschott8961]

Look / read carefully… It says SUBMIT YOURSELF…SUBMIT YOURSELVES, that means willingly to do so. Each “help-meet” is to willingly submit themselves on to another as “beneficial adversary”… as the Hebrew conveys. it’s not intended to rule over by force but with WILLINGNESS.

[@-o-dq7nd]

Indeed, submission is not slavery, doesn't exist. If a woman wants to leave she can there is nothing forcing her to say especially in this day and age. She must choose to submit.

[@aristobrat4987]

exactly. i willingly choose to allow my husband to make most of our decisions. does it bite me in the ass now and then ? yes. is it still a better dynamic than too many chefs in the kitchen ? also yes. its so odd to me how women think WILLINGLY SUBMITTING means a man is your slave owner. like who hurt these women to where they think all men are slave drivers ? they cant even tell you because most of them are just morons crying about having to clean a kitchen in a modern country with fucking kitchen robots doing most of the cleaning. im literally about to order food from an ipad so i can finish unpacking my new apartment. its so crazy how lazy people are that they think doing HOUSE CHORES is slavery

[@celuiquipeut6527]

Try to explain that to a feminist. Lol

[@ferraridav]

@Aristobrat it's because those women bought into the false notion that intersexual dynamics are a zero sum game. So in their minds if a man wins, a woman loses. They can't comprehend the notion that men and women can win together.

[@j.p.5716]

This is true but it's an INSTRUCTION given to wives, not a suggestion.

[@27merk]

Thanks guys. A refreshing change for the better. :)

[@mattgordon3437]

Thank you Jordon. Wise advice.

[@XI24]

People dont usually pay attention to another command that says - Ye husbands, likewise dwelling with them according to knowledge, giving honour to the female as to the weaker vessel, and as to the co-heirs of the grace of life: that your prayers be not hindered. 1 Peter 3:7 Imagine that! That a husband must love his wife to have his prayers heard.

[@rickjames3562]

the last sentence blew my mind, i sit here with a beer in my hand knowing it will absolutely drive my woman crazy when she gets home and strain our relationship, he just made me realize how selfish im being. time to grow up, im dumping all my beer

[@gwengelineau1124]

Good job for that man, you’re life will only go up from there

[@micahmendoza3737]

This is a powerful realization I hope you keep it up I hope the best for you.

[@cheezedoodlenygguh6229]

lame.....

[@emeldamubaiwa7142]

Did you dump it?

[@rickjames3562]

@@emeldamubaiwa7142 every last drop

[@shirooumu]

That makes it more clear than expected, so you are supposed to submit to the relationship with one another, in contrary on what it might sound to someone listening to it for the first time, which could be submit to the whims of your spouse, the point is to submit to the relationship and to your spouse as external(as of self) representation of it, which makes things a lot easier for people who don't like the idea of submission but the idea of giving it all for the sake of a healthy relationship with one another

[@Black_pearl_adrift]

I almost agree… but I’m caught on why wouldn’t the text just say “submit to the relationship?”

[@daisiesandpandas1218]

​@@Black_pearl_adrift because the Bible in the same chapter goes on to describe how that looks like in the husband, the love of a husband should be one that he can even die for his wife if needed That kind of husband is not a power hungry bozo testing his power and at every whim saying something nonsensical to test and demand submissiveness. But everybody ran with one verse and stopped reading, atheists, men who think God values them over women etc.

[@user-cb2xm5pm3q]

​@@daisiesandpandas1218Men have never argued against that. I have never heard a man say that he would rather his wife die than himself if put to that situation. Women have protested there role very vocally.

[@sn1ck796]

Wonderful video!

[@YHWHsaves-dot-com]

Amen, well thought out and articulated.

[@charmainemiles4089]

Tammy, and Jordan are a gift from God, for us to watch them together to see the admiration they have for each other from a life of being together, they stand out as beautiful, I love them and their respect they have and share with us the viewer's

[@davidshepherd397]

My wife and I see the world in different ways, and when we travel we often see different aspects of the same places or events. When we are at our best this allows us to take a trip twice as we share these differing perspectives, in a way that give us a deeper understanding or what we have seen, it that makes any sense. It's not confrontational, as we offer our perspective in an unvarnished way with each other knowing that the other wants to hear what we say, and we do it in a trusting that we won't be laughed at way, which is both humble and assertive at the same time. Life events have conspired to upset that delicate balance which when we find is truly more than each of us can hope to create or discover alone, and we are working on that. perhaps this is what JP is describing, or something like it.

[@raphaelsamonte457]

I wish JP added the part about the husband, loving, protecting and if need be, dying for his wife as Christ died for His Bride - the Church 😇

[@Minnesotayankee]

Maybe he will soon . I think he has touched on it before but not in a Biblical sense

[@Nat-lg2ks]

A friend of mine takes the idea of submission far too far. His poor wife doesnt even get asked her opinion as he believes God wants him to make all decisions.

[@gregpowers4353]

I am sure that there is more to this...

[@daisiesandpandas1218]

​@@gregpowers4353 what more? We shouldn't just tell men they're heads of households, we need to give them books in effective leadership. This man may not even be evil, he just thinks this is what a leader means: Not giving a damn about the thoughts and concerns of the people you lead

[@gregpowers4353]

@@daisiesandpandas1218 - I have counseled numerous men about leadership and issues... and rarely are the facts as this is presented. I'm not saying that it never happens, but I know women who have expressed this position and it turns out that they have their own issues and when it all is balanced out, the 'rest of the story' paints a very different picture. I agree that men need guidance on biblical leadership, teaching from the pulpit on it, counseling on it, etc.....

[@avapilsen]

​@@gregpowers4353no, many men literally never seek out their wife's opinion on a single thing.

[@cheezedoodlenygguh6229]

@Ava Pilsen Who cares? Has listening to w0men ever done civilization any favors? It seems like it only has gotten worse since. Too many opinions from those who shouldn't even be heard.

[@AmphibiousWarrior573]

Let's take a moment to appreciate that JP has more followers and subscribers than The View and MSNBC. The tide is shifting.

[@nula654]

I also start a story with; this is interesting, especially when talking to my husband, and his usual answer is... hmmm, that's nice dear. I wonder if Jordan's wife does that too? I can't help but chuckle at the way she watches him talk. It's lovely.

[@gabriellahsdancingheart8808]

Why did you put the commercial on top of the talk? That was a powerful part of the response to hear.

[@tristybrooke33]

I’m just so happy you exist Jordan Peterson. You are truly a force for good in the world

[@AlexMcDaniels]

I'm always impressed by Dr.Peterson's ability to communicate, he's truly a gift to humanity. God bless him and his family.

[@yhckelly]

I'm a minister. This is always ridiculously hard to explain with any depth. Jordan rattles off a 12 min answer with no notes that explains the dynamic perfectly. I'm stealing all of this. Thanks, Dr. Peterson!

[@redtobertshateshandles]

Say a prayer for him. This level of thinking must hurt..

[@smokingcrab2290]

The Bible is tough to explain. It's written simply, but the depth of meaning in it is hard to investigate and it's hard to articulate. JP could be a brilliant theologian

[@susannaemmerich1166]

Thank you!!!🙃. Now I'm alone😢.❤

[@FB.RocksannROUW]

Thank You for that.

[@blueprintsg]

Beneficial adversary was the exact term that had my mind blown. Now going to the neurosurgeon to stitch it up.

[@virginiatushman3240]

Thank you for explaining so clearly the concept of "wives have to be submissive to their husbands". In the old days, pastors always used what Paul said (God created Adam first so he is the boss; it's Eve who caused Adam to sin so she is incerior) to accuse wives and demand them to be submissive to their husbands (eg do whatever the men tell you to do) and if you don't, then you are not spiritual and you rebel against God.) It's been a spiritual blackmail to me. I've been married for over 20 years, and my husband always uses this to rule over me. He makes all the important family decisions (He also claims Paul said man is the head of the family). Listening to you makes me feel like someone is telling a victim of rape that it is not her fault.

[@vassilopoula]

Horrible😮

[@gregpowers4353]

I suspect that there is more here to explore. I know of a couple where the wife was the accountant in a firm and the husband said that he needed to do the money. On its face, it appeared to be a poor requirement of submission on his part. BUT... once the 'rest of the story' was identified, it turned out that she had a terrible gambling problem and she was playing a shell game with money and they were broke beyond broke. He took a ton of heat because he would not embarrass his wife in public about the issue but there was no way she was getting access to managing the accounts once he found out. More often there are elements of rebellion in the issue and one has to be careful about assuming one way or the other here.

[@dasan9178]

Adam was WITH Eve (it’s stated clearly in some Bible versions) at the Tree of Knowledge as she listened to the serpent and took the fruit. He could have at any time chased the snake away, told her not to take the fruit, or knocked it out of her hand. He didn’t because he was also interested in what the serpent was saying, considering what it would be like to have special knowledge, and doubting God. Eve didn’t cause Adam to sin. He failed in his duty, trust and more. It’s why the Bible says by one MAN sin came into the world. Sure, she played a role in it, but hers was secondary to his.

[@daisiesandpandas1218]

Your husband disrespecting you may be causing some of his prayers and hence family prayers to be hindered. "Husbands, in the same way, treat your wives with consideration as a delicate vessel, and with honor as fellow heirs of the gracious gift of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered." 1 Peter 3:7 BSB "In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. Indeed, no one ever hated his own body, but he nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church." Ephesians 5:28‭-‬29 BSB Does he work? Ask him about a higher up at work/ church who dismiss his opinions, suggestions, concerns and leads without giving a crap about the people they lead, ask how that makes him feel. Asks why he feels that way when he should just obey and bite his tongue like he's said you should.

[@kodichianigbogu9015]

Please read the bible for yourself and ask God to give you understanding. People twist words all the time!

[@VISIOUSCHERRY]

Thank you Dr Peterson

[@maraillanes4753]

Sublime clarity❤

[@sisterdaughter908]

A woman’s deepest desire is to submit - but she must feel safe 🌹

[@areyourhandsbroke]

Mines not

[@daisiesandpandas1218]

I don't think so, but the second half of true.

[@avapilsen]

Talk to more women.

[@user-sq5si3rn5g]

@@areyourhandsbroke Me either!! Yuck!!

[@monika7727]

Damn.

[@tanman966]

My comment has been removed through ‘breaking community guidelines’ I hope anyone reading this figures what I’m hinting at: I was in a very dark place, but Dr Peterson was a huge part of keeping me around to listen to such videos as the one you’re viewing now... Thank you

[@HALee-]

May our Creator continue to work in your heart. Bless you, my dear. 🙏🏻

[@ormoran4401]

just wanna say that the word "ezer" means aid basically, from wikitionary in hebrew a rough translation would be "what is added to a force in order to complete it's action". "ezer" has no military context by itself, you can say a certain group of soldiers became an aid an 'ezer' to a current force (A once word translation of ezer would be aid). In addition the phrase that peterson is trying to recollect is "Ezer kenegdo" which translates as "an aid (ezer) against him" which does fit what he is talking about.

[@josefranco480]

Wow idk if it’s just JP or if preachers everywhere are shaking their heads saying that’s what I’ve been saying for the past 20 years. I’m gonna say maybe a lil but still he’s reviving Christianity and the foundations of Western culture. Makes it look so easy

[@hunterlinton1672]

Me over here with my ball gag and leather harness realizing that's not what he was talking about

[@andreya9776]

[@denisegilmore88]

🤣🤣🤣

[@masuknadim2966]

Thanks for the vocabulary class mr Peterson

[@juliamcleod6277]

This is so good.

[@oraclesma4575]

Excellent breakdown...

[@victoriacampbell7651]

Ephesians 6:21-25 ❤Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. ..... ❤Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands...... ❤Husbands, love you wives....

[@Notme811_you]

can I add ? 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

[@ryanking4559]

What about relationships where one's skills and pitfalls are juxtaposed to the skills and pitfalls of another, helping both of you be more complete and well rounded. If I'm a great chef, I don't necessarily want to marry another great chef, although true that we might challenge one another to be better at that skill set. But when your skills are more complimentary, I feel like it provides for a more rounded life as a whole. If one enjoys what the other finds dull or less interesting, and can help you to explore those things in more detail, or in the case of homemaking, take care of the things you don't enjoy, while doing the things that they don't really enjoy, while still having many common overlapping interests, you've got a perfect match in my opinion!

[@terry9238]

Sure. Now where can a woman who isn’t good at homemaking find a man who is?

[@everonlyallforthee]

A great video with the worst ad placement possible 😂

[@LivingBGLegend]

I'm learning and with every comment and view of content we are teaching AI

[@Cinderella227]

Thank you, Jordan. ✝️❤️ Being in the zone when I read the Bible or jog is a natural high. I’ve not been lucky in marriage but I do believe it’s possible with the right man.

[@MsQ275]

marriage is not luck, it's work. your Bible tells you that.

[@Cinderella227]

@@MsQ275 Yes, we all know that especially Christian women. Have a wonderful and blessed evening. Ciao 👍🏻✝️

[@brucej1278]

Yes, marriage can be hard work, but like all other earthly things it depends upon more than just the efforts of the two people involved. Effort alone, without certain gifts from heritage, environment, or society will not bring any temporal good.

[@Cinderella227]

@@brucej1278 A marriage needs mutual love, respect, friendship, and harmony. ✝️

[@KD400_]

​@@Cinderella227 all bs. Stop this equality crap. U as a woman have to submit to a good man. It says it in the bible. Theres no partnership in marriage

[@bloodyamazing]

maybe "teamwork" is a better word than "submission"

[@rajatpatel8846]

not exactly cus submission dynamics means giving the authority to the husband who takes it and puts it on himself as responsibility to take care of her wife

[@j.p.5716]

Better for what? The Feminist idea of marriage? Certainly not God's idea.

[@donnaperkins9262]

Love you so much Sir! Theater, smoke? Must be the director to whom you have to compromise, BAD choice director! All we need is him and HIS skills. Will listen and share as long as you and yours are willing to educate me. HEART OMG... HEART❤

[@mountainmover.s]

The thumbnail is soooo perfect

[@julijanacvejic517]

Well now we understand why Megan Marcle and Princ Harry cut the "woman will submit to her husband " part out of their wedding ceremony 😅

[@big_red_machine3547]

I love the view that man and wife “submit” to the idea of working together as one to move forward together, truthfully, to counteract the “catastrophe of life”. It’s not about dominance or outshining the other partner

[@redtobertshateshandles]

In the early days of my marriage, I felt and acted like we were in a power struggle. We both agreed we were assholes.. I've now surrendered, for my own sake.

[@ioioiotu]

Nature doesn't care about what you love, the normal sexual dynamics dictates that the wife submits to the husband.

[@recoveringsoul755]

You're only supposed to submit AS TO THE LORD, so if your spouse tells you to rob a bank, you do NOT need to obey that. Because God would never tell you to steal. Only a good man who himself follows God, and has your best interest at heart, should be followed. Far too many power hungry abusive males take this submit thing to mean essential slavery.

[@jacobfamily4544]

And you would be surprised the amount of women that already have attacked him over this. They are misrepresenting the whole point of the video.

[@big_red_machine3547]

@@jacobfamily4544 agreed. It’s women who don’t even care to understand what JP conveys. They got their backs up over the whole “feminine = chaos” theory and refused to listen to anything further

[@markmantooth7693]

Man... Crowder was right with all the ads. However JP... Thank you for your wisdom.

[@DonTruman]

Wow, that's rich. Rich with insight and depth. Fascinating seeing his wife there too, while he speaks so deeply about marriage.

[@bellyfulochelly4222]

The irony is that so many people who think it's horrible to submit to their spouse think nothing of submitting to the will of their child. The former is an effective strategy for a successful marriage. The latter is a recipe for ultimate failure as a parent.

[@gatanegra8815]

A child is your close relative. A husband/wife is practically a stranger, so the comparison is weak, sorry.

[@yogi2436]

@bellyful ochelly You are very wise!

[@donatello9482]

@@gatanegra8815 lol what ? The child grows up and leave to find its own spouse and create their “close relationship”. While you’re alone in a retirement home because you neglected the relationship with your spouse for your kid. A lot of people make this mistake and suffer for it

[@HamzaKhan-sk1rs]

@@gatanegra8815 "practically a stranger" 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@daisiesandpandas1218]

​@@gatanegra8815 wow...

[@toml.8210]

He's right. People think submission is a kind of slavery, but if you actually know it means you are both on the same mission, according to the Spirit, it means something much better.

[@janellemonfort]

Loved it

[@madamedennis6726]

Excellent!

[@tracypoynton571]

So many men take advantage of the term submission and help met and an awful lot of women do not fully understand the concept allow this to happen and get advise from other women that encourages the abusive husband

[@cheezedoodlenygguh6229]

At least men understand order. Not enough of your cries and whims will throttle our righteous control.

[@sitdownstandup91]

men only understand violence @@cheezedoodlenygguh6229

[@tanyamilewski5700]

It is slavery if your demands under the umbrella of submission are slavelike. It doesn’t matter what you call it and definitely a waste of time discussing it. What matters is what’s actually happening in the dynamic and if those activities are slavery. Plenty of people disguise slavery in words like respect, submission, employment etc so words without action don’t mean anything. The truth is if your employment is long hours and meager pay no power to change it you are a slave. If your husband expects you to be his mother and maid but also thinks his income is all his and you are disposable when he sees fit and you can’t do anything about it you are a slave. Slavery is about power and abuse of said power. Submission is not slavery only when the power is equal. If you submit by force or because you have no other choice but to submit that’s slavery. If you submit because you have power to revoke the submission then there wldnt be need to discuss or argue about the topic.

[@robertflyingheart2427]

The problem is that MANY have never felt love Doc, i've heard this several times through the years, they think differently.

[@Miossoty1]

Really learned a lot. The concept of helpmate/helpmeet, the woman as man's Ezer, is quite intriguing.

[@maiahatcher9949]

Once I heard that to submit is to be under the mission of someone. I believe the mission of a husband is to lead his family. A husband is supposed to lead like Christ Who honor the church and died for her sacrificially. I believe many women wouldn't be afraid to submit to someone who really knows what that mission look like. The problem happens is when the woman completely trust their husband with that mission and many years later she's completely lost and abandoned, Sometime deceived and hurt or even exchanged for someone else. Many men use that card of submission to control and deceive and it's very hard for woman to really know Where the line of submission finished and the line of controlling begin. I am not against being submissive to a man that carries that mission with truthfulness and wholeheartedly

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

I heard differently that a couple should be an equal partnership. Anything else, the woman is a slave

[@juliecarns]

Maia, Well stated.

[@skeelatheskink8724]

@@wyleecoyotee4252 men and women are equal….having different variations of roles or ways partners agree upon to support each other in, within individual couples, does not make one or the other above the other.

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

@@skeelatheskink8724 You're not equal if one's role is submission. In an equal relationship there are no roles

[@crystallogic2543]

A woman can show submission to her man and thus reveal not only the authority of the husband's position but simultaneously the responsibility. A good man will toil in sacrificial love under that responsibility. Not too useful if you marry a sadist though, which is why you should take marriage seriously and choose a trustworthy life partner. Of course it's often also the case that women are in their sensitivity too oblivious about a man's coldly rational yet benevolent ways and may take undue offense. Which is one of the good reasons for submission.

[@irishflutegirl9022]

Oh my goodness his wife is adorable ❤😊

[@candisesmith4704]

This was so helpful.

[@Bishopaaronbeachy]

Excellent

[@carmalcaddy5261]

Only if you are married !!! Situations Don’t count thats even if you have one

[@geneticsmatter3834]

Make Men Respectable Again Make Women Modest Again Make Families Whole Again

[@ii-es2sn]

Men is a reference to more than one!? Start by being a man..! Set an example to find the right woman.... Forget the playing fields of men and women! 😉

[@davidopsahl9188]

Feminism and women are 100% to blame for the current relationship environment. They would rather share a few 10 level men than have any relationship with any man below 10 level (good looking, 6 figure income minimum, 6 foot tall minimum and 6" pleasure unit minimum). But you keep lying and putting all the blame on men, that will not have the effect that you are supposedly seeking. You see, women use BLAME and SHAME in their tactics to control men and, thanks to the internet, men are waking up to this more every day and those that wake up disregard with prejudice ALL shaming language.

[@MsQ275]

❤❤❤

[@janiecel]

Spot on

[@dominiquemathews8617]

The best conceptualization of submission in a marriage or romantic relationship I've heard yet.

[@earldeuna6932]

Men also submit themselves in a marriage

[@TVAvnger]

My husband doesn't want a submissive woman, he likes my mental strength, leadership and energy. He doesn't want a subservient wife.

[@richardc861]

Yeah he wants all that you say and also the submissive part. Sounds like he’s got himself a good woman

[@narendrasomawat5978]

Men will choose submission over everything.

[@j.p.5716]

That's because he is a weak man who is unwilling to bear the full responsibility of the family on his own shoulders. Any man, who can be honest, wants a submissive wife. Any man who says different is either lying to himself or lying to you.

[@kelleylahner9503]

Ezer kenegdo (sp) translates to Fierce Lifesaver. Much less whimpy sounding than helpmeet. In my opinion. Cheers!

[@GBoysEntertainment]

What’s up with the fog machine 😆

[@PJHEATERMAN]

If you understand what real love is for your spouse and it's mutual then you have no worries. Real love being you except your spouse's flaws and build a life together, because we are all flawed. When you see someone as perfect with no flaws is called "Limerence" and it isn't love and it will fail.

[@madcapmagician6018]

WTF a commercial right over a good portion of his explanation of the hebrew word he was using... 👿

[@amihere383]

One of a few reasons I’m increasingly disenfranchised with Peterson and DW. More and more it’s beginning to feel like the conservative media are the exact same as the left wing media, just flip sides of the same coin giving us equally skewed views of the world when reality is somewhere in the middle.

[@zan6585]

@@amihere383 I didn't know this was news lol

[@danieldornyo3041]

You should be grateful you're getting these videos or free. How do you think they make money to put them together for you?

[@Knowyourworth888]

If one can't explain something simply, one has yet to understand it.

[@WrightlyDivided]

Last 4 mins is good for people with short time

[@Justin-vq9co]

So really "submission" is an older term to "commitment." Essentially because people constantly talk about how progressive they are today, there is a sense that everything that matters to you is of your own free will. There is a separation of "basic survival" and "the thriving of a soul." Which, although the two go hand and hand, I dont think modern people have any clue how arrogant it is to think that the purest form of dedication to the best possible scenario for yourself and other people, is something you just magically come up with out of your own good will. Its partially kept up by some sort of commitment, sacrifice, whatever you want to call it, to ground you in the first place.

[@MusiicRoolz]

commitment is part of it but it's more about surrender, trust in the partner, giving yourselves to each other, giving yourselves over to the relationship and energy between you (not that you don't have autonomy and boundaries ofc)

[@mycrazylife408]

Men are more logical women tend to be more emotional. Men are the protector and provider so naturally he’s going to be the team captain or leader. That’s why the women submits to him. It’s politically incorrect to tell it how it is though.

[@daisiesandpandas1218]

​@@mycrazylife408 not true, you're speaking in stereotypes and caricatures. There are relationships where the wife is more level headed and less emotional. The husband is still assigned to be the head. Head doesn't mean you have something more than your wife, or she has something less than you. You're still thinking in terms of earthly ways. That the one who is lower is the one that submits.

[@avapilsen]

The meaning of submission did not change. Women are told to obey their husbands. There's no way around this.

[@abytom7401]

One of the best teachers of all time , God's gift to humanity , a bacon of hope and love , very sharps thoughts but kind in heart . Pls upload more videos . Hats of to your family . God bless

[@pianoreigns]

If he's Gods gift to humanity , then religion tells he has to be crucified. Or is that only for Miracle Makers.

[@dbalgp1047]

@@pianoreigns He kinda was -- he and his spouse with illnesses near death, losing his job and his students while being publicly villified by hundreds of thousands for a crime he did not commit. Not two pieces of wood in an X but a slam dunk metaphor. Another theology would say: we're all God's gift to humanity, if we live the way we're supposed to :)

[@flashwashington2735]

Could I have two eggs of love with that bacon of hope, two slices toasted rye humor, and a cup of jo mamma please?

[@japsahibdhillon5014]

'you' goes for both!

[@XDWX]

I always hear wives need to submit to their husbands but not the opposite. I wonder why that is.

[@GodSoLoved.Yeshua]

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church" Ephesians 5

[@ambernichols8603]

I've noticed the same... And while that's a lovely scripture, it does not explain this disparity. I believe it's mostly human emphasis error not the Word of God that is at fault.

[@daisiesandpandas1218]

Humans love exegesis. Even without the Bible you see in most cultures, they go as to say Men are better and of more value than Women. Whilst the Bible says you are, joint heirs in Christ, there's no male or female before God. the Bible is very counter cultural. Exegesis is when you have a thought already and you go into the Bible to confirm it. You will end up reading the part that favours you and ignore the others. Notice that the husbands who do this do not consider their wives join heirs and as valuable as they are in the first of place? Kind husbands do not go in to read just that part, they read everything else, and also the part that concerns how they are to behave.

[@ethanweber7976]

@@daisiesandpandas1218 That is most definitely NOT what exegesis is.

[@j.p.5716]

Because God said so.