You Will Always Be Single If You Keep Doing This

[@ColeHastings]

Yo, I appreciate you guys sharing some extra tips in the comments too. Also I forgot to mention in the video but I'm currently doing a sale for my Ultimate Self Mastery Course. If you use the code "NEWYEARS" at checkout you get 10% off, and the discount is only available until the end of the month. You can find the course here: cole-hastings.com/selfmastery Hope to see you in the community.

[@ColeHastings]

😂@@nickwallenda768

[@JustJC5]

Here’s another tip: Do not go on meetup, to any class, or anything you do or don’t normally do with the only intention of seeking a romantic relationship. If you do this, chances are you will either push people away, and/or end up in an insecure relationship to begin with. There are plenty of people in this world that are also seeking friends, professional partners, study buddies, etc. A real romantic relationship doesn’t start from jumping down the rabbit hole, it’s starts from a slow and genuine connection.

[@Chucanelli]

Yes! I’m a swing dancer, and there’s always a couple guys there who show up week after week for years but never even try to learn more than the basic step. They dress up, hit on follows, and suck to dance with. The follows who are there because they actually love dancing don’t dance with them. They’re not creeps or anything, they’re just not fun to dance with. It feels like saying yes to a dance is saying yes to a weird 3-minute date.

[@ProfessionalProcrastinator1]

As a woman is refreshing to see a normal and actually useful take on dating. I'm just so tired of radicalization, either from one side or another, all it does is put us against each other and end up achieving nothing.

[@ndo.bchizzle]

Exactly.

[@kmstirpitz4285]

I agree. Both men and women need to step up to solve our issues together. This can be only solved united. This gender war thing gets quite old NGL.

[@ndo.bchizzle]

@@kmstirpitz4285 real talk. Women this, men that, I'm tired of it

[@LilXancheX]

@@ndo.bchizzlethey both hate each other, it’s nature 🤷🏽‍♂️

[@pouletlemieux5302]

@@LilXancheX not its not. Thats culture, not nature

[@RoyKW1]

I want to add another thing: It's important to discuss non-negotiables early-on in the relationship. I had long-term relationships {2+ years) end, because I was scared to discuss kids, marriage, where will we live/settle down, careerbuilding, etc. I wanted completly different things and it's sad when a good relationship ends, because you don't see eye to eye on the big things.

[@Floracarrillo936]

I met my girlfriend in person and trust me it’s a way better method to have long term relationship then say online we’re you got to sort of fake your self

[@ColeHastings]

it definitely leads to a higher success rate

[@dedasalmeida9047]

Lucky

[@nobodysperfect06]

I assume you had to ask her out

[@dd07871]

Going my own way has given me power. I always put myself first and don't let women distract me. Sure, I'll go on dates, but I'll never let getting a woman become my main motive in life. You'll be surprised how many women this mindset brings as opposed to just being hung up on one woman. I also don't make moves if my gut feeling is telling me it isn't right to do so.

[@skumnightshyamalan]

Same here. Just keep your head down and work on yourself for a few years. Eventually everything just clicks and you get options. Jacked and stacked talks about this in a lot in his videos

[@SirJoelsuf1]

Agree with all of that except the last line. I don't trust my gut when I make a move, I just do it and deal with the consequences later. I mean if the chick isn't having it I'll back off but when it comes to making move that "gut" feeling is just more propaganda brought on by the new alliance of fake tradcons and bra burning Karens who still think monogamous marriage is a good idea for society lol

[@isabella6075]

Good keep moving on 💯💯

[@AnPrimWrestler]

Based

[@fuzzypanda1684]

I went my own way...but only because every girl I had any interest in wanted nothing to do with me. I figured saying I went my own way was less depressing than saying I can't get a date.

[@lueyes22]

I’m a woman but I love your videos. Such a genuine soul. I think you’re helping a lot of men become the best versions of themselves.

[@tayzonday]

Part of my problem is that very few people have SEO parity with me, which is a big part of empathizing with my life.

[@DuderMcDudenstein]

lmao WUT

[@toihin5500]

☠️

[@innocentrage1]

Chocolate rain!

[@Kryptdegen]

Legend!

[@nerdeater27]

If even this legend can't find someone who he can truly connect with, then God help us all lol.

[@wayfaringstranger2798]

the hardest thing is actually to find a girl who will be ok with having a conversations you have shown as an examples. Most of the times the you realise that conversations on dating apps and real life are not the ones you are really enjoy having. Dont be frustrated by that fact, just keep on going

[@dd07871]

Learn small talk. However even after practising this, if you can't keep a conversation while dating, it won't work. It's a good sign she's not into you. Find someone else.

[@fuzzypanda1684]

Wait...you actually get replies on dating apps??

[@jixyrover1759]

I’m a girl and I love how this video was actual genuine advise for *real* relationships. I’ve had so many times where I started off liking a guy but because I was subtly pressured for sex early on it fizzled. And it wasn’t like they were doing it on purpose (some) but in my experience a girl can feel when u don’t have genuine intentions and that negatively impacts trust early on. Genuinely being interested and wanting to actually learn about each other as people is when I felt comfortable enough to actually get physical with my partner because I didn’t feel like being physical is the goal. And I’m not even talking sex in this case- I’m talking just kissing and holding hands felt uncomfortable because the more I touched them they more they would subtly or not so subtly push me to get even more physical with them. When they weren’t focusing on the strictly physical aspect I found myself actively initiating and actually liking touch with them a LOT more. On a side note I heard this quote some time ago that said “girls get physical when they’re emotionally bonded and guys get physical TO emotionally bond” don’t think it’s entirely accurate but it is interesting to think about

[@savagebeafy]

This dating advice feels so much more comforting to listen to compared to other dating channels

[@richardsmith175]

I definitely fall into the category of man that doesn't set boundaries early on and gets walked over and manipulated. My most recent relationship showed me this about myself. Now I'm working on improving that aspect about myself

[@nic21831]

Hey Cole, I really appreciate what you are doing here. I was in a 6-year relationship and got broke up with in the beginning of 2022. A lot of the stuff you talked about on why a relationship doesn't work is true and you don't realize it until you go through it. I have learned a lot through my breakup, as much as it sucked. Dating has been extremely draining for me but your videos give me hope. There is a lot of BS on youtube about dating and lifestyle but your videos are more in line with the man that I want to be so I just wanted to thank you for your work.

[@samantha_hazel_]

17:44 Be aware, some people don't like to be hugged, or touched at all, by strangers (or by anyone in some cases). Only hug them when you first meet them in person if you know for sure they're okay with it.

[@ColeHastings]

True

[@ماهربإذنالله]

I give your vedios like befor even wach you help my alot while I am in addiction thank you love from sudan

[@itzYonko]

Sending love to my brothers out in Sudan!

[@blue-the-realist]

@@itzYonko lmao 😂

[@itzYonko]

@@blue-the-realist What's funny?

[@blue-the-realist]

@@itzYonkocuz u already know what’s funny don’t trynaa fool me lol

[@Ashraf7I7]

@@blue-the-realist ?

[@betterhappensdaily]

I struggle with dating. This helps and boosted my morale a lot actually thank you.

[@betterhappensdaily]

@@kas1843 damn i never thought of that

[@betterhappensdaily]

@@kas1843 im sold

[@rokometer8]

What are your struggles exactly?

[@positive_vibes_2427]

I'm 32 and never been in a relationship. Looks like this guy broke the process down perfectly. Going to apply these tips

[@pauldirc..]

Still virgin ?

[@DrAngelKins]

​@@pauldirc..bruh

[@patricks357]

You encourage being honest and genuine in dating and that's rare. Being genuine is a risk , but a risk worth taking for a long term relationship . I commend you for your perspective.

[@indigo96968]

Wish this type a video for women i need help lol

[@Nick199607]

Cole, been here since the beginning. And i just wanted to tune in again. U helped me through alot the past 2 years, and im happy to see the growth of your channel. Thanks for helping everybody, including me with the mental aspect of life. Thanks alot mate. I wish u a great 2023! :)

[@ColeHastings]

Good to still see you here. Thanks for the love

[@LeeF12347]

So refreshing to hear some advice that isn't all "alpha male" red pill crap

[@KingSkrap]

You’ve restored some of my faith in women thanks

[@williamwong5981]

Thank you Cole. I had recently realized that being direct is far better than beating around the bush, and your thoughts confirmed it!

[@redricblue8790]

See this is why I love this channel, it explains all the nuances, explores the topics in depth and don't push you into a cult

[@minabotieso6944]

But one of his points was buy my fing course. Every single advice video he does has a piece of advice that is just buy this product

[@redricblue8790]

@@minabotieso6944 I see that can be annoying, but if not for him I wouldn't have learned about some useful apps like betterhelp

[@minabotieso6944]

@@redricblue8790 I tried betterhelp and I found it too expensive and not very good. He used it as advice not because it was good but because they paid him. Nothing advertised on social media is good for you. All these apps are scams. The group sessions on betterhelp are not worth going to a second time. They present the same info every week. It’s very difficult to find a good individual therapists. All the ones I tried on there were garbage. The app only gives you 30 mins to talk with them and the therapists move really fast then push you out the door

[@Sarkartraining]

Congratulations on getting in a relationship. Wishing you both all the best ☺️

[@Gspook19]

The one about red flags is so accurate, my gf was n alchoholic, smoked and partied. Was self destructive with bad economy, SHE wanted to change for me. She stopped drinking, smoking and partying, i helped her with learning economy and insurance, i feel these big obstavles have bonded us like nothing could, i will do anything for her and her for me, we had hardships but if we can survive that we survive anything ❤️👌 thanks for a great video, thankfully i found my soon to be wifey 😍

[@jons4934]

You found a homeless woman?

[@Gspook19]

@@jons4934 naah, just a woman on a bad road in life

[@SirJoelsuf1]

@@jons4934 Why would she be homeless because she drank, smoked, and partied? My last gf was a travel nurse who made $125k a year and she drank, smoked, and partied. Responsibly, but she still did that stuff. Like AT LEAST 90% of any given western chick over 16 drinks, smokes, and parties...often well into their 60s.

[@lueyes22]

This was so sweet. She has no idea how much of a blessing it is to find someone who cares enough to help her transition her life. I hope she doesn’t screw this up lol. Sending you both a love & blessings ❤

[@Gspook19]

@@lueyes22 Thank you, nå she does not screw it up :D still going strong and improving each others life :D thank you for the love and blessings sending it back

[@JellyLancelot]

Man, dating scares the crap out of me. I was living my best life and a relationship just kinda happened. All the stuff you said in the video just kinda happened naturally as I navigated the space as it unravelled in front of me, I've always had a balanced social circle around me, so I just treat men/women as people, I'm kind and show a genuine interest as thats just who I am. So I've never had social anxiety in that sense, I'm pretty confident in myself and people tend to naturally like having me around. Anyway, me and a work collegue would go on lunch walks, just talk about random stuff, our lives, and we'd message about what each of us are getting up to or send each other music and stuff. That kept getting stronger and we hung out more outside of work, then after about 6 months we both caught feels, I said I was interested but she wasn't ready yet, a month or so later and she asked me out. We were practically already in a relationship anyway and both admitted that later down the line. That relationship lasted 5 years, the happiest 5 years of my life and it ended out of knowhere a month ago. I'm still devastated and working on moving on, the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life as its like fighting against your own heart and soul, against my own happiness. For only being a month on my family/friends have said my progress is remarkable, but I don't feel it. I feel awful. I'm so scared that all this is ahead of me again, although its way to early to be thinking about that stuff, I gave everything I could to that relationship and supporting her through so much trauma and self discovery with all the unconditional love I had in me - which now feels all thrown back in my face, which is horrible. We always worked on ourselves and met the others feelings with openness and a willingness to work on oneself. We always had eachothers best interests at heart. We played like kids and let our hair down, lived in our own little bubble. We retained active private lives and time for ourselves. When stuff got serious we went into that mode, then when silly times rolled around again we'd relax into that. Urgh, it was heaven, but its over now. Therapy and processing this all healthily with lots of journalling and KZbinr's like Cole have really helped ease the mind and work through things. I refuse to ever entertain certain ideologies people go down at this time (redpillers/incels) for this isolated heartbreak. Call me naive, but I just see the good and happiness in people, be kind to people, and that's how I've always lived my life and intend to always do so. Just turned 30 as well (which just adds to the mental pressure). I'm just lost and scared at finding that deep connection again, that vulnerability, that trust. Having it all happen so naturally in the past means I've never had to face this reality of modern dating. I'm not a cynic, and refuse to ever let the world turn me into one. I've seen too much good and good in people I've met to believe otherwise. But I'll be damned if that journey doesn't scare me again. I'm not going to be ready to start that path for many months yet, but I hope when I do I don't let the world crush me. I want to retain my character, continue to build and grow as I always have and who I am regardless of what others think. But right now, I'm still at the phase of 'we had it so good, I can't believe its all over'. Because we genuinely did.

[@bro918]

I dont get it... why did it end?

[@angedusoleil]

I appreciate you sharing yourself so authentically here. One way to look at it is this: you have firsthand understanding now that this kind of fun, comforting and fulfilling relationship is possible for you. You know how it works and can easily replicate it again with the next right person. From age 25-30 is a time of really becoming yourself and it sounds like you were able to do this within a relationship that was supportive and enriching of the best parts of you. This other soul healed and grew to the point that she needed to be able to understand self reliance or to further heal things that her comfort with you would never challenge or evoke. The same goes for you now. “Every new beginning is some other beginnings end.” When something significant happens like this, look for something equally significant that’s trying to get you to make space in your life. Only this time it will be next level, as long as you don’t let fear keep you from being your authentic self. ❤

[@TutorialConspiracy]

This was so beautiful to read, how are you doing now?

[@dalitsobanda8295]

This video just made feel like iam finally breaking out of the red pill bubble you mentioned in the other video about dating i definitely need to stick to your advice this time by all means thank you Cole Hastings🙏

[@Squiddy3633]

Don't listen to the above comment I believe in you don't look back keep going we'll all make it out man just keep moving forward

[@justaguy7590]

​@Soldat Intelectual not everyone is a fatherless loser like your npc ass. 😂

[@andyphuong3102]

I keep thinking dating got so bad cause I’m surrounded by a few negative folks that I do hang out with and they all say dating in (NYC, which is a huge generalization) sucks but after watching this video, it’s not all that grim in the dating world there’s always a positive to look at. After my short break up last year I discovered this channel and I have been watching your videos since man. Amazing work and thank you.

[@gankdalfthedank9855]

I'm 30 so I've been around long enough to tell you that objectively dating has gotten significantly worse. Particularly as people disconnect from the real world via social media etc. It'd be delusional to ignore this fact, HOWEVER it's also a trap to lean into a perception of resentment and utter hopelessness on the flip side

[@joelmeedel]

keep doing this kind of content cole, info like this is very important

[@ColeHastings]

Thanks for watching

[@dylansjourney]

It’s super interesting watching these relationship advice videos as someone who’s been in a serious relationship for almost half a year now. I just like to see if anything you talk about matches with my personal journey. Keep up the great work Cole!

[@brianalester4404]

21:05 though leaning in slowly so they don’t feel caught off guard is good, as a woman i think if it’s your first kiss with that person it’s always amazing when they just simply ask, “Can I kiss you?”. After y’all have kissed before and been on more dates THEN go with the slow lean in approach.

[@moonbabyy3]

There is one thing that I (as a girl) can’t understand in the scenario described. So you meet a girl from a dating app who is basically a stranger to you and you’re not even sure yet if you want to see her again or if your goals match, yet you lean for a proper kiss. The same thing with the sex on the 2nd date… you’re only getting to know this person and don’t know if you want her to become ur girlfriend or not, why have sex then?? Wouldn’t it be more logical to first get to know each other, decide if you want to be in a relationship and only then have sex?? Otherwise, you could end up having random sex with lots of people from dating apps.

[@KingButcher]

This seems to be what people do, yes

[@baki577]

Fr, dating nowadays weird af

[@rookiej5587]

This is what it is nowadays and to me it's strange that people don't find it odd 😂. Anyway it's their lives so not for me to comment but personally I will never do this.

[@weekend1rocks]

Yup, as a girl I was thinking the same thing. I was like wow I would never do all that kissing and touching on a first date.

[@Joemaniac]

Yes I agree, he should bring his gf in for her pov as well in vids. Some of the advices i felt were from his assumption of how women would react😅

[@Gh0stGaminginc]

After being single for a LONG while, I've just started considering dating again. You seem to upload just at the right time for what ever thought process I'm going through lol

[@mitsukislife]

As a girl, the devious line would absolutely work on me because it's true. I get so tired of people assuming I'm "innocent" or whatever, you can feel when someone doesn't want to dig deeper to get to know you. So even if it's a line you'd use for many girls I appreciate that you're asking something that invites more conversation. Too many people want to skip over the crucial step of learning about one another.

[@paul8926]

Cole, I’ve been watching your videos since the lockdown, and very happy you finally connected with a beautiful woman. 👍

[@thereselagerqvist609]

The biggest problem with dating theese days is the lack of honesty.

[@ganeshram580]

This is super self comprehensive. It's long, but rather reduces the amount of confusion. Thanks very much

[@Joex0f]

This video is great and really helpful. A lot to digest and absorb. I've had a lousy year of dating so I told myself to work on myself for the next 6 months or longer until I feel ready and got my stuff together. I find this very informative and a breath of fresh air. I feel confident when I'm ready again by simply watching and the knowledge you shared. Thank you.

[@Beantastrophe]

Folks, the lie will travel the Earth 3 times before the truth takes its first step. Cole's audience is low due to the fact he's telling the truth while his peers are already in the millions with lies. Cole will be one so many look up to well into his prime. This is pure gold

[@al1bert._151]

Just wanted to thank you for going in depth and emphasizing on a deep relationship.

[@Dont_Kara]

Girl chiming in here! Not sure if every girl shares this sentiment, but I looooathe talking about work. But if you must, make sure it doesn’t turn into an interview.

[@phoenixaz8431]

''So, what are your long-term goals as far as your career goes?'' I know a certain %age of the population actually are passionate about their work, but given the opportunity to have the same benefits and amount deposited in one's account every two weeks, I'm guessing most people would find more intringuing, exciting, fulfilling and fun things to do. Oh, and I love your name!

[@weekend1rocks]

Same, I’m a girl and my work is not a romantic topic to me.

[@temaladegaine-ti6zg]

Hi! I'm 21 yo male traumatized with my first love experiences (I stopped school because of this) and the 2 videos are the perfect guide to know how to act with girls. Thanks from France

[@zubat0532]

Thank you, I usually don't wanna see a romantic relationship as something that will make me happy, though I think is an experience worth having, being a happy and helathy person and sharing that with another significat one seems very cool to me, and this video helped me better understand and put into words how to get to that point of sharing your happiness with another person, after building self-esteem for so long, I feel like I should build more love for those around me, and be a light for them, and maybe possibly find a partner.

[@Traumatised311]

So happy for Cole 💜 He finally found a girlfriend Congrats brother

[@nobodysperfect06]

He no doubt had plenty of girlfriends before he found his current one

[@levernis5753]

He did!? (reading this comment while the video is just starting). I'm happy he found someone.

[@Beantastrophe]

Cole is the best. This is true self improvement that will last for generations. He is demonstrating what truly works vs the propaganda spewed across the authoritarian platform called Red/Black Pill

[@minabotieso6944]

This guy’s point about self improvement was literally but my course. He sells a product as advice in every video

[@jermaineishmael7225]

Incredibly mature and informative, such a refreshing take on dating.

[@thepizzafoogle5481]

I’ve been feeling very lonely and frustrated for the past few months, and I think a lot of that comes from the fact that I have never been in a relationship before. I’m 17 and it’s bothering me a lot. I rarely meet girls who I take an interest in, but the girl I met a few months ago at college, who I developed a crush on over time, already has a boyfriend. It’s made me feel too many emotions, and my brain has just shut down and tried to suppress them. The whole experience made me realise how little I understand relationships, and I almost feel like I will never get into one.

[@SirJoelsuf1]

You're...17. Plenty of time to do what you need to do. I can tell one mistake you made and I made the exact and I mean EXACT same one when I was a 17 year old stupid kid: You developed a crush on a chick. Gotta understand that doing that is the closest thing to being abusive (towards yourself and the chick) without actually being abusive and I actually mean that. Not cool, the earlier you learn that lesson the better. Its alright to appreciate a chick. Perfectly cool to say "you know what, you're better than the other chicks I come across" but leave it at that. Catching feelings like that and looking to a chick for validation like you want her to replace your mom or something? Bad move. Here's a goal you should set, something my dumbass should have done when I was 17: Make it a point to invite at least five to ten chicks out on a date per week. Assuming the school you go to is pretty big, this shouldn't be a problem. Get shot down? Here's a good line to react to save your embarrassment: Right on, that's cool. Sorry if that came off as weird, I made a new years resolution to get a better partner than the last one I had. So I'm just trying to get out there. You can also say something like "Gotcha. Sorry if I bothered you, I just made it a point this year to be more outgoing. Didn't mean to make you a part of that or anything haha." And damn, WTF are you doing in college at 17? I was 19 my freshman year...too early in retrospect. I should have started college at 25 lol.

[@thepizzafoogle5481]

@@SirJoelsuf1 What the actual hell? I am not going to go out with a million girls a week, that's honestly the most superficial dating advice I've ever heard. I'm not going to randomly go out with a bunch of girls I don't even know, that sounds like a good way to get a bad reputation. Also, how is having a crush close to being abusive? It's a perfectly normal thing, and what do you want me to do about it? And what do you mean looking for a girl for validation and to replace my mum? Btw I live in the UK, idk what you do in America in the education system.

[@thedannybseries8857]

To be honest buddy I don’t think dating is something you should be concerned about. It’s a worthless pursuit that usually ends in disappointment and regret. Wait for transhumanism to come save us.

[@thepizzafoogle5481]

@@thedannybseries8857 The fuck?

[@Kenji-117]

Shoutout to you and your Girl for being Berserk fans. This Manga is really something else and had a major impact on my life philosophy.

[@hcy0772]

Recently got dumped by a girl I was seeing and I wish I had discovered you before meeting her, I definitely could’ve come off as more confident and assertive

[@warrr_machine]

Thank you for making this video. I was clueless until now. I’m aware it’s sad asf but I grew up with a mother that hated me and I’ve been discovering so much and healing so much. I searched why I falling love so easily and here I am….limerence. I’m built for this and I will def work on this.

[@867star]

Okay. I got rejected. Swiftly, by some girl I've liked for months. It still hurts to this day. However, I have found your channel, and this video. I think this video will be my goal from now on. Succeed and complete every part of this video. I will struggle, suffer, cry, and be jealous of others....... But I know I will figure this out. I don't know when to quit. To stop loving. Thanks Cole.

[@arthkoshta7800]

Love the overall positive vibes from your videos man

[@DFM761]

Something that helped me with cold approaches was if the initial contact went well and she seemed interested, instead of asking for her number I would ask if I could give her my number, leaving the ball in her court. That way if she wasn't actually interested I wouldn't waste time texting (bothering) her and feel let down eventually, and if she actually did text me then it was pretty obvious she was interested

[@alexfortano153]

I’m 26, reasonably good looking guy, good shape too, who’s trying his best to self improve daily because of my failure to launch. I’ve never been in any real relationship before, mostly hookups that never went anywhere. Despite a longing to be in some form of a relationship for years, my biggest hurdle is the insecurity of my place of residence. I still live with my relatives, and it’s the only thing that stops me from actually continuing a relationship in fear of feeling judged. I intend to change that, hopefully sooner rather than later, but it has made an impact on my dating life. At the very least, I’ve still been practicing my social skills with women, and hopefully it will pay off in the future.

[@arandomperson2495]

Exactly what I needed, thanks cole!

[@eduardmart1237]

What if you don't have your own place? And can't afford one even working on a relatively good fulltime job, because housing prices are just unbelievable? )

[@VERsingthegamez]

I'll save this for later. I got other things going on in life and I've tried a large ways of the last decade to get a date but I'll come back to this once it dies down.

[@sebbwubbue8302]

Grate video I like how you put the timed points I have adhd and it took me 4 hours to finish the video pausing and stopping to run around , dancing or daydreaming and do stuff it's 6:01 am now and I'm almost done

[@ondreatorrence4322]

You do a great job with the editing. I really enjoyed this video

[@dflorez1982]

Keep it going Cole your doing great

[@RelentlessRoger]

Focus on yourself, improve and don't look for love, it will come by itself eventually

[@markro1049]

Good advice for women, terrible for men

[@dd07871]

@@markro1049 No, it's great for men. Looking for love wastes precious hours. There's nothing like finding love out of the blue (just like in John Lennon's song).

[@markro1049]

@@dd07871 For most young men in this day that is bad advice. Young women are overwhelmed with good options thanks to social media, if you don't put some effort you won't get anything. I agree that improving yourself will help you a lot in finding a girl, but it doesn't mean you stop trying and just wait for it to happen because for most guys, it won't happen.

[@PablosPill]

@@markro1049 I agree. Men should't chase women but should rather focus on improving themselves. But part of improving yourself is putting yourself out there and initiating conversations with women. Women are very unlikely to initiate, even if they're interested.

[@RelentlessRoger]

@@markro1049 I see what you mean but I'm far from being interested in women who use social medias, what I meant is that if I become good enough and reach some higher niches I'll be able to find high quality women

[@ChiaraSupernova]

Dear god thank you for giving men actual good advice 🙏 bless you sir

[@namitpiriya]

Hats up to you man putting out a 38 minute video and hooking the audience till the end.

[@black_sinister]

i am also berserk fan and that 371th chapter hits like a ' no not with you ' in a cold approach

[@Beantastrophe]

Cole will be much bigger than Hamza and Sneako one day

[@minabotieso6944]

Him getting bigger is just a sign this lonely male issue keeps getting worse

[@PCLHH]

Cole is already way bigger than Sneako. In all ways.

[@pary710]

this timing is insane

[@sophiaisabelle027]

We appreciate content like this. Keep up the good work.

[@mortishacanniba]

I love this cover image for so many reasons~ ✨️💗✨️ Excellent video & advice! Going to share this with my younger cousin who always tells me he's struggling in the dating world. My perspectives & advice has been very similar to yours, but maybe it'll hit different for him to hear it from another- happily dating- male nerd. 😄🙏 Much love!

[@demo_venom]

Finally a Video that tells me how to talk to stranger in public.

[@azhaanebrahim4887]

Much appreciated it feel like you read my comment because you touched on a lot of stuff really needed lots of good information keep up the amazing work 2023 let's go😎👍🏼🔥💯

[@erin22222]

I would rather “never find someone” if they take from my happiness due to non negotiables. As a woman that list is a lot longer.

[@bloodsremainments]

Wow. I don't usually comment on videos, but this has answered so many of my thoughts and problems. Even though I can't really explain it, I can understand why this video makes sense for me.

[@spliffs1831]

I have been with a girl on and off for 6 months, ive been debating leaving since shes became a totally different person for the worst, everything you mentioned here that is in a bad relationship... she does, thank you man!

[@stadtbekanntertunichtgut]

At this point I`m not even sure if love is real. Not just for me, I`m not sure if someone, anyone ever finds real love.

[@Sarkartraining]

If your idea of love is like you see in the movies, maybe not. If you are looking for a relationship then yes you can find it. Love is an emotion and in a relationship emotions are inconsistent. Sometimes you will love your partner and sometimes you will hate her, but the relationship stays. Focus on sharing experiences together and be each other's support in tough times. The romantic talk, kissing, sex will happen alongside when you want it and will need a slight to no effort to make it happen

[@stadtbekanntertunichtgut]

@@Sarkartraining Thx for sharing your thoughts/experieces.

[@Sarkartraining]

@@stadtbekanntertunichtgut Most welcome and all the best ☺️

[@vanessarenmd7010]

As someone who has been married for close to twenty years, I'd like to assure you that love is very real. Your comment suggests that you share the larger cultural belief about love: that love is a passive emotion that will "just happen" to you if you find "the one." However, love is not a noun, it's a verb. It does exist, it's not something floating around in the ether... you have to make it. Love is created by your daily choices, meaning you must make deliberate decisions that benefit the relationship and the wellbeing of your partner. After the initial infatuation dies (which it always does), love must be carefully maintained or it fades away. This is done by acting with integrity and continuing "to chose" your partner each and every day. John Gottman has some very good advice about the nature of love, should you be interested.

[@hankrodriguezhill7029]

I never subscribe on the first videos from a channel but this feels good subscribing and liking your art work thank you.

[@eliprenten7066]

Really good points, wish I knew a lot of it earlier. I'm too exhausted to get anything going anymore tbh, it's a lot of giving a man has to do.

[@ipurplebunny3327]

28:30 It is possible that you are being too much and you have to work on that. People have boundaries and limits it does not necessarily mean they are in the wrong for expressing that.

[@woodbridgesfinest1904]

Thanks for the tips, excellent video.

[@dr.tapasyadiwakar1246]

If i wanna know ppl i remove looks, status, money and degree,and just superficial words.... Thats the best thing to know ppl.

[@SirJoelsuf1]

Yeah measuring your self worth with those terms is dumb. Just get your happy ass out there, see what you get, then go from there. Boys who obsess about that kind of stuff couldn't approach a thousand chicks in a year if you PAID them, let alone go out with any. Meanwhile I don't care about any of that and I do just fine with the opposite sex as long as I choose to get out there.

[@anamantics]

I know this is mostly targeted toward men, but after trying for a few months and after getting ghosted and basically told they had no interest in me other than sexual, I have given up. I have social anxiety, am terrible at conversations unless I am comfortable with someone, and have low self-esteem. No one will ever be interested in me or want me, so I'm not going to bother trying.

[@SAMUELCRAFTER1]

lol i feel the same and I’m a guy. just put in the work, things will sort themselves out eventually. i’ll continue living my life, if nobody wants to join me, their loss 💪 Your worth is NOT tied to the amount of people that like you. Stay strong 🫶🏻

[@SAMUELCRAFTER1]

I got a girlfriend :) i’m telling y’all this shit works

[@jacobmansfield-go9fz]

It's easy for women, you are just picking the wrong men

[@PauloKuga7]

this is the sort of video that internet needs

[@highsol222]

This vid just made me realize the internal conflict I have when it comes to dating. I realized I do want to settle down, but not in a "normal people" kind of way. I do want a family of my own, but probably not in the U.S. And if it had to be here, than not in the south, and definitely not California. All that is stuff I have to get sorted before I even consider a long term relationship.

[@dmobxts]

Hey Bro, I just wanted to thank you for this awesome video, I enjoyed every minute of it and it helped me alot. Very underrated.

[@raeh9719]

Tip: When you're apologizing, do NOT use the "if" word. Saying things like "I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings." No, sir. You DID hurt her feelings, that's why she's telling you that you did. No if's. "I'm sorry I hurt your feelings", "I'm sorry I made you feel this way", "I'm sorry I did that" will suffice. Do not put the blame on her in your own apology. Ladies, same goes for you. It goes both ways.

[@jacobmansfield-go9fz]

Better to not apologize

[@lukeeagan5961]

Cole dropping a banger as always

[@andrestor-me]

What you said to that girl, I made up my own version of it, and I'll use this one from now on, thanks

[@Malumbrus]

Love that Guts/Eclipse wallpaper.

[@deboy811]

Awesome video. Love the in depth and open minded guide, it aligns quite well with what I have learned myself dating. Glad you pointed out that you need to choose what is important yourself, instead of the red-pill standard advice.

[@beesmcgee4223]

I feel so lucky I was using online dating back when it was new. I didn't even have a profile pic up and somehow made a connection with my partner based on needy interests and now it's been 12 years. If I had to do it now, I'd meet people locally by going to activity clubs because the online dating scene seems very depressing.

[@damohelvete]

This is proberly the best dating video I've seen. Be confident and go other friends.

[@Keynote24]

Thanks for the info Cole. 😉

[@rogersnick17]

Damn. I am a business owner and know that my standards are really high but this is the first video I've ever seen where the philosophy makes so much sense to me. I'm going to let some of this s*** go and go into the dating game. Appreciate this video. Giving it alike. My KZbin algorithm is undefeated.

[@lazyblue6922]

Honestly, every female I’ve ever been interested in I’ve always had competition, so I just realised I need to stop chasing this and travel a different path, it has also drained me to the bone because of it.😅

[@Joel-pg4yi]

I met the love of my life. Myself. 🤗

[@DankBeatzz]

Dude I had a date where we were about to say goodbye and she kissed me on the cheek, I was shocked, and said, 'thank you', it was so embarrassing. She ghosted me the next day lmaooo Love the videos about what to do

[@michaelisonyoutube]

Hi Cole! I love your videos. Thank you for motivating me to start my own KZbin account.

[@ColeHastings]

Thank you. Hope you stay consistent with it

[@mrworldwide5811]

My eyes also lit up when you mentioned that she mentioned the beserk wallpaper

[@db2ez]

Idk why I keep watching these videos like I’m actually going to meet someone lmao. Great content and info though Cole

[@dafne_rdz]

aawww man, what a beautiful story 🥰

[@kushagrasrivastava440]

title and the content is totally incongruent with each other... i rarely dislike videos but you made me do it