You Won't Believe What They're Doing To Your Favorite Sport

A scandal is rocking the world of professional Curling, and as a purist, Stephen is concerned.
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[@shivassondhi2140]

"Dragons Den" came to Canada as a copy of the UK version. "Shark Tank" is the American version of Canadian Dragons Den....

[@KingOfMadCows]

This take down of the Curling controversy was cold. Colbert won't let anything slide by him and proponents of these new brooms are on thin ice. He rocked this segment and anyone who disagrees has to be stoned.

[@CurlingZone]

+KingOfMadCows Nicely done :)

[@MrStreetballer5Official]

+KingOfMadCows You have to be pretty stoned to actually watch curling...

[@jamesdoe6013]

+KingOfMadCows -high five-

[@JahonCross]

Down low

[@jamesdoe6013]

Joseph Senatus -down low- :3

[@Tyberes]

also fun fact: curling is probably the most heavily associated sport with drinking. from way back it has been customary for the teams to buy each other drinks after each game. and you'd play multiple games. that "not being drunk" joke is way less of a joke than you'd think.

[@arianafiorito5721]

The first part where Stephen was talking about his wife was so cute! 😍

[@kemchobhenchod]

I wish I had a random arm come out for a high five whenever I dropped a great zinger.

[@vespathrenzulon5558]

I'm loving the high five! Haha - they just come out of nowhere XD

[@forstefter35]

+Vespa Threnzulon my favorite is the one where he forcibly high-fived the guy. don´t recall which clip.

[@br3wzter98]

Would've been funny if he didn't high five, and then said "phycked".

[@CoolsBreeze]

+BR3w Zter He did that once on the Colbert Report. It started out where he kept high faving the hand like 4 or 5 times and then psyched him the final one.

[@br3wzter98]

Cool to know bro... Hey search Daizha Morgann, thanks me later mate

[@RawwkinGrimmie64]

+Vespa Threnzulon +CoolsBreeze is right. This was a constant thing on The Colbert Report, only Stephen's desk was so large, the guy was actually able to fit underneath his desk.

[@keithmcintyre6403]

Shark Tank is a copy of Dragon's Den, which is a copy of the UK's Dragon's Den, which is a copy of Japan's Money Tigers....so it's a copy of a copy of a copy of a copy.

[@druidofdark]

Stephen is so good at timing with his audience. He'll throw in quick little ad libs and such to keep his flow.

[@tokyomilmil]

Well I’m 3 years too late but for anyone who still wonders, our beloved host Stefan is actually professionally trained in theater art, especially the improv part (Wiki it for proof) ~

[@emks902]

That harry Potter reference was GOLD

[@PaddySnuffles]

Curling's one of those sports that look really dumb, you're not into it but get dragged to a game by a friend, and next thing you know you're standing on your seat shrieking "SWEEEEEEP!" at the top of your lungs. It's also fun to play. :)

[@aaronpower998]

bru true (I play out of the national training center in Canada ) this broom shit is funny as hell tho

[@LungsOutJem]

I'm starting to think that bowling would blow some people's minds.

[@cosmicriptid]

What is the point of the brooms?

[@Lupin788]

I think you have the concept backwards. The stones tend to travel in the direction you throw them. Sweep does briefly melt the ice but this action can change the direction the stone travels, making it bend (or "curl") to the right or left.

[@dross2172]

it briefly melts the ice under the broom thereby making the passage of the rock over top of it go in the direction you want or at the speed you want. It really is a very technical game. Skill is definitely required and only the best make it into nationals let alone Olympic teams.

[@samspamable]

"Oh you can't, BECAUSE HE'S DEAD." I think Stephen is the king of meta-comedy

[@patrickhobbs3962]

Still too soon.

[@MegaAJCProductions]

Canada may be ruining my favourite sport. But the USA is ruining my FAVOURITE way to spell words.

[@michaelv4871]

If you're in love with the way you spell words, you have a problem. If curling is your favorite sport you have a problem.

[@MegaAJCProductions]

+Anonymous Channel if you can't pick up on the sarcasm, you have a problem

[@michaelv4871]

+Aaron Chandler Sorry about that. Didn't realise it at first.

[@Wveth]

Up here you have to insulate the consonants with extra vowels. Keeps them warm. Sourry.

USA sports don't get to make fun of "world tours".

[@TheZeroJoker]

Shark Tank is the US version of Dragon's Den.

[@grubbu7073]

TheZeroJoker well played Canadian...

[@kurtsudheim825]

No he's right, but the british version was 1st as usual, like idols & x factor etc. (& no I'm not a brit myself)

[@grahamcouture6786]

The curling ice is pebbled. Sweeping makes the rough pebbled ice smoother by melting it and it refreezes.

[@blairproctor4874]

There are 1.1 Million Curlers in the world, and 1 Million of them live in Canada. Our opinion in such things matters I guess. LOL

[@scottmcmulkin1056]

+Blair Proctor 1.8 mil world wide 1.3 mil are in Canada

[@RonanArm]

+Blair Proctor Source?

[@blairproctor4874]

it's a common joke, and was said many times during the Vancouver Olympics. but it is a semi true statement. the largest concentration of curlers resides in Canada.

[@RonanArm]

Blair Proctor Oh ok, i was just curious it sounded interesting :)

[@blairproctor4874]

you don't know how to google? or propose a question in a non aggressive way?

[@jancovanderwesthuizen8070]

I heared of the performance enhancing brooms before. Nimbus 2000 I believe is what they're call

[@poptart6662012]

curling is super fun! shout out from the historic ST. Paul Curling Club! (St. Paul, MN)

[@miaschannelforcommenting]

surprised Colbert didn't mention the fact that a ton of canadian universities DO have quidditch teams which makes this story all the more ridiculous

[@nicolesong6199]

+Yushan Cong this is true tho

[@hobbitbobbitt]

I don't get why Americans think curling is so funny. Their football practically doesn't involve feet. *drops mic* *apologizes then picks it back up*

[@alexday8266]

It's no secret that we can be pretty idiotic. I mean we ended up with Trump as our president.

[@MickaCrespo]

Real football does involve feet. As a matter of fact using your hands is a foul (unless you are a goalie). That awful rugby wannabe is not football.

[@bloodstoneore4630]

no, most of us think football is stupid as well

[@R.M.MacFru]

American here, and I don't. I loathe American football, European football, and basketball. I love watching curling, lacrosse, and ice hockey.

[@TheDanishGuyReviews]

European here: That is NOT football.

[@markwiseman29]

Dragons den was on for years before shark tank. In fact shark tank is created by the two stars whom were originally on dragons den for many years but are now solely on shark tank Kevin o'leary and Robert Hergavec. Without dragons den there would be no shark tank eh. Thanks Canada!

[@starlinguk]

+mark wiseman Er, Dragon's Den is originally British ...

[@QuietLurker]

+starlinguk actually the show originated in Japan.

[@Whelmed.]

+Rob McIlroy - I saw it on Valyria One ages ago.

[@KOFUNLOADED]

Actually the show originated in New Zealand!

[@greg.sym.4115]

+Tyler Sampsel Japan. That may have been the first English version though.

[@theenglishman]

"Just ask Cedric Diggory. Oh wait, you can't because he's *dead*!" Hey Stephen, there's this guy named Theodore Nott you might want to talk to. I hear he's very well-connected.

[@isaacsussman5632]

Oh yeah, them Canadian dragons are quite the nuisance.

[@kurtsudheim825]

It's called dragons den because of the alliteration & connotation of a dragon in business; plus the original series was the british show, & well, the dragon is on the welsh flag, says enough, which then spawned others around the world, they just changed the name for the us version

[@cookieaddictions]

That quiddich joke was amazing.

[@dannyrobins9700]

The thing is I just started reading the fourth Harry Potter book and haven't got to the part where apparently Cedric died :( what ever happened to a spoiler alert lol

[@Ranieac]

+Danny Robins 10 years happened lol

[@rudyschmidt6799]

there should be a sport that is just a recreation of urban combat, albieit with paint rounds from a rifle, not exactly like paintball, also I do like watching people in a cage or a ring fight eachother in a contest of personal fortitude, bravery, and aggression. These would have direct practical applications to hand to hand combatvand warfare, unlike most modern sports.

[@jacoboverton6626]

Whoever made the sweeping decision on all those puns deserves a high five. But when you think about it, they'll probably just brush it off as their own idea.

[@okrajoe]

Gotta watch those licensing fees. Love me some fish soccer.

[@Heavenlydreamer]

Canada holds a special place in my heart, its nice 2 see Stephen Colbert and the new crew :D

[@TyrSkyFatherOfTheGods]

I gave up curling when they moved away from corn brooms. That's how much of a purist **I** am.

[@vrulg]

I like how 4:57 is actual curling jargon for a shot that would probably be very difficult (depending on where all the stones involved are, of course).

[@bjkmurray]

I love watching curling. It's oddly mesmerizing.

[@joesmith3708]

For the record: two of your 'Sharks' ARE Canadian Dragons.... ;)

[@Yans1428]

Curling - THE BEST OLYMPIC SPORT EVER

[@juliepurwin1477]

I love curling because it is more complicated than it seems. Science, Stephen!!!

[@terrywhelan6651]

Try curling it's fun and not as easy as it looks. Steven Colbert should give it a go. Worst case scenario every rink in Canada I've been to had had a bar. After a game you will be sore especially the next morning. It's fun and a good way to ride out the winter months. Try it!

[@michaelv4871]

I wanted to report you, but it's just not worth it.

[@terrywhelan6651]

+Anonymous Channel Have you ever curled? It's fun!

[@JeoshuaCollins]

Look, nobody said it's not a fun game (at least, not Stephen). What was said was "Nobody watches curling". And I would agree with that,. It's more boring to watch than golf.

[@Lorna3391]

Hey, Stephen, our World Curling Tour is like your World Series Baseball.

[@greg.sym.4115]

The Dragon's Den name comes from the UK version.

[@DagothBob]

+Greg. Sym. And Dragon's Den in Canada came years before Shark Tank did in America. It's also worth noting that Kevin O'Leary and Robert Herjavec are both Canadians, and starred in the shows on both sides of the border.

[@twodimensionsjhr]

+Greg. Sym. Wasn't the Dragon's Den based off a Japanese version? That's now all over the world? May it be with different titles? I do watch Dragon's Den Canada and Shark Tank too

[@Engiflux]

+twodimensionsjhr Ya there was a Japanese version called Money Tigers first but it was changed to Dragons Den for the UK in 2005. Canada copied that a year later and a few years after that America made Shark Tank.

[@imPladdy]

+Greg. Sym. thats usually how we do it ether we make something and Americans take it or they make something in the uk and Americans take it

[@Googaliemoogalie]

which is based from the japanese show...hence dragons

[@lacountess]

Shark Tank was spun off from Dragon's Den FYI. Two of the sharks are also dragons and the dragons are as tough, if not tougher, than the sharks, Canadian or not.

[@Darkpuerquito]

I want a job to highfive Colbert where do i send my resume?

[@williamluck3885]

Fantastic sport. Love the teamwork.

[@psychclone]

FYI, Dragon's Den came wayyyyy before Shark Tank. Shark Tank was the American spinoff of that show. So, Dragon's Den isn't the "Canadian Shark Tank"; Shark Tank is the "American Dragon's Den". God, how petty of me to point that out.

[@gregorclegane7563]

Curling is the ASMR of sports.

[@ViolentFEAR]

The irony of Stephens joke about the "World Courling Tour" is a lot of popular sports in the US are only popular here...

[@CassiopeiaDream]

Baseball is extremely popular in everywhere but Europe and Africa. Basketball is very popular everywhere but South America. American football is only national though.

[@imperator5228]

@@CassiopeiaDream For now; the NFL's trying to bring it to the UK.

[@mcaddicts]

Americans go crazy for baseball and golf which are equally as boring to watch.

[@whyhatestrangers]

Americans like watching/playing sports like baseball, basketball, even hockey, because there's a pretty obvious objective to meet. They also have teamwork, and chances for the physical contest of brutality. You can watch clips of curling all day and wonder why they are so into sweeping ice as fast as possible before you realize - oh, that's right, they're Canadian, they don't need a reason to slide around on ice.

[@dannyrobins9700]

Americans aren't crazy about golf.... Also baseball is a slowly dying sport.

[@garryburton36]

+Danny Robins Too slowly.

[@whyhatestrangers]

Not so fast! They haven't tried baseball on ice yet!

[@WRanger87]

Curling is infinitely more exciting than golf

[@kylacaswell177]

World Curling Tour is actually quite accurate. Most of the bospiels in the World Curling Tour will have teams from the UK, Sweden, China, other European teams and sometimes the US. Probably about half of the team will be Canadian though since it is always in Canada where they can actually have people pay to watch the events.

[@PKidForever]

Dragons den totally came first. And you stole our Dragons 😂

[@GoddoDoggo]

+TheEternalBookworm Bah, go ride a Zamboni ya mangy Canadian!

[@kurtsudheim825]

Actually it did, dd was the british show which everyone copied, they just changed the name for the us version

[@JoJaDaRu]

I'm Canadian so I guess I'm biased but I love curling. It's actually entertaining and for the straight guys out there if you want to get into it... start with women's curling.

[@humanonearth1]

Well it's one of those pastimes you can do and pretend you're athletic while getting hosed. It's ridiculous enough of a game that you can actually play it hosed too and the outcomes aren't much different.

[@serdnae]

"2 in 1 Shampoo and toothpaste, yeah I'll fund that" LMAO

[@WildOutdoorLiving]

I think curling looks awesome! Being from the US I am not 100% sure what's going on but I love it.

[@dross2172]

Hi from Canada. Curling is a blast!!! It's great fun, lots of laughs, dynamite exercise for your upper thighs and butt and a wonderful excuse to down a few brown and bubblies.

[@llewellynkereiff75]

Think of giant shuffleboard on ice

[@Foskitty]

I guess if you don't know much about curling this kind of thing seems silly. The difficulty in changing the trajectory of the rocks is a huge part of the skill factor of curling. It's not exactly uncommon for sports to have banned equipment because of the effects it has on the game. Baseball has illegal bats and tampering with baseballs with various chemicals is strictly forbidden. This is really no different, and it's coming up now instead of earlier because the technology involved in these brooms is, well, brand-new.

[@TheMrVengeance]

The difference is that curling looks inherently silly as fuck.

[@thequake180]

Who cares if its hard to do? Kissing your own butt is hard to do does that mean we should turn it into an Olympic event?

[@Wveth]

Any sport you personally aren't used to looks silly as fuck. It's purely cultural. And if enough of the world does it, we should turn pretty much any physical game into an olympic sport. Why the hell not?

[@dominika3762]

@@TheMrVengeance not more silly than hitting a ball with a stick and then running. Some of the time. And most of these times nothing happend :)

[@MasterPoppers]

@@TheMrVengeance I mean, that's only because you didn't grow up with it. All sports are silly as fuck from an outside perspective. I've never watched a game of cricket and I think the set up is weird.

[@scook9999]

I have actually watched curling, it has a lot of relaxing, zen qualities to it.

[@LulzRoyce]

Up Top! The high five was hilarious, totally original and caught me off guard. Best late night show ever.

[@AGL23]

I'm from Canada. I think the impression that Steven made of Canadians is offensive ehh! Sorry.

[@killbot999]

+AGL Captial That stereotypical Canadian accent is only represented from a small part of Canada, Its also a joke that Americans have evolved over the years so its not like Canadians get to chose how they get made fun of unfortunately

[@flyinspirals]

Like you guys never mimic our accents...

[@LungsOutJem]

#NotAllAmericans

[@tokyomilmil]

Haha your joke took a few seconds to sink in but that’s hilarious my dear Canadian friend ;-)

[@Mixima101]

Dragon's Den isn't Canadian Shark Tank. Shark Tank is American Dragon's Den. We came up with it first.

[@kurtsudheim825]

By we you mean the brits

[@pnguyen45]

I think the ban is going too far. I want to see the best go head to head with the new broms.

[@BossGalka]

+Charles WiNiN They banned it because as the players said, 'anyone who has never even played curling before could just go out and make it move', making their jobs obsolete and insecure. I guess you could argue it takes the skill out of the game, but if the game only has skill because you have to use obsolete tools, should we still be playing the fucking thing? It certainly shouldn't be an Olympic sport anymore.

[@EclipsisTenebris]

+Boss Galka By that logic, neither should be archery or some of the others.

[@BossGalka]

Dracul JOSHI You are completely misunderstanding what I am saying. Archery uses modern bows for archery, they aren't using a stick of wood and some sinew or gut for the strings these days. When a new, better bow becomes available, they will incorporate it. The problem is that curling is refusing to update their shit. That being said, the Olympics should cut out a lot of games. While I personally don't see a point in many of them at all, at least a few should objectively be cut, if for no other reason than no one finds them fun to watch.

[@EclipsisTenebris]

that depends, there are archery competition specifically designed to use wooden bows. I agree, what counts for fencing these days is a joke and whoever thought it would be fun to watch people run or jump over hurdles? At least Ping Pong and canoeing require skill as well as physical fitness. And the shooting is always way more boring than the archery.*****

[@cheddyrod]

+Charles WiNiN What are broms?

[@ssboooy4153]

Dragons Den is actually older than Shark tank. And you have two of our Canadian business moguls

[@JeoshuaCollins]

Those puns hurt me physically. I feel like I need to sue Stephen Colbert for mental trauma, now.

[@utah133]

Curling. I could get into that, but only because I'm a Canadaphile. Canada is America done right. It's only due to drawing a lucky number in the Vietnam draft lottery that I'm not a Canadian right now!

[@darinnixon1730]

This is really funny, I liked this report because as a Canadian it makes Americans laugh at us, which is good. That way Americans will not come here and turn our country into a place where vthere is mass shootings every day or bring their divisive racist rhetoric to Canada. Keep going with more funny commentary on Canada. I love it.

[@michaelv4871]

Here's what I don't get. Foreigners call Americans racist, even though that's racism towards America.

[@Themanwhowantedtobe]

+Anonymous Channel America isn't a race

[@michaelv4871]

+Themanwhowantedtobe What I meant by that is this. Foreigners are all hypocritical. They make fun of Americans. Yet if we make fun of them, they give us shit for it.

[@flyinspirals]

Just build a wall!

[@Nangleator22]

Don't worry, Darin. As long as you have socialized medicine, it'll always repel the worst Americans.

[@irone7049]

As a Canadian, just let me say sorry about Curling. Thanks, eh?

[@gemmaskate]

The Dragon's Den jokes were a little ignorant considering it was a British show that came long before Shark Tank, based on a Japanese show.

[@kurtsudheim825]

They took dd to the us & changed the name & pimped it up a bit for us audiences

[@davidedwards3361]

Don't forget, Americans are taught that EVERYTHING good was made in America first, and everything bad comes from foreign countries, and if something is good and obviously foreign...make jokes and insults about it. It's the American way.

[@sandysimpson4785]

spudnic88 😂😂😂😂😂what????

[@MrPerlew]

All the pics of people playing curling behind Stheven was of norwegian people, I dont know why, but its cool with me.

[@MKPiatkowski]

Team Ulsrud! The coolest guys in curling!

[@CantStayAway]

As a Canadian, I don't know whwether to be flattered or insulted that Stephen's giving us this attention...:P :P :P

[@thelight5384]

I am Canadian too, and we know how to laugh at ourselves. So laugh!

[@abigailserrano7971]

Lol I know, I'm having lots of mixed feelings watching this! 😜

[@wilsonofcanada]

He also has a few others about Canadians including a few about our weed industry and shady tariffs

[@Sraye]

Love how he smoothly linked the curling brooms to Quidditch.

[@Benj2336]

wow Curling is my favorite sport

[@adamcastelsay]

This is bigger than steroids in Baseball

[@sodorflubbs5000]

Don't diss curling. It's Played a lot in Scotland and we're good at it.

[@Shorty_Lickens]

Fun Fact: Stephen Colbert shares a birthday with Robert Pattinson, who played the original Cedric. May 13th.

[@Ireland264]

The story about his wife was absolutely adorable. :) Also thank god high five guy is still here.

[@falconeaterf15]

I've curled for many years with an electric curling broom. The head of the broom is heated to melt the ice surface slightly, you can also use the ultrasonic vibrator for crazy good sweeping action. It's all controlled by the amount of pressure you apply. More pressure = more heat and vibration.

[@bowriver1]

betcha Colbert couldn't go 10 ends...

[@jacobdavis6561]

My home country with the big sweeping news

[@youtoober2013]

"No one saw this coming!... because no one watches curling." lol my thoughts exactly. 3:23

[@lucymumma8840]

I mean Fred Weasley is also dead and he played quidditch.

[@-shutupmichelle-9581]

phhh Everyone died

[@theinevitableheatdeathofth7921]

Lucy Mumma WE DON'T TALK ABOUT THAT

[@sruthinambiar2701]

The inevitable heat death of the universe We don't :(

[@sapphireseptember]

Too soon! 😭 So it's been over ten years since I first read that book (currently rereading it) but still! Rowling is a big meanie!

[@ianreeve1420]

Canadians (like me) are just so happy to see us mentioned in a segment, that we don't care if we are being bashed. Give us more Colbert!

[@ducheswannabe]

lol Stephens wonky ear is so adorable...

[@Ani0227]

+duchesswannabe i never noticed that lol. it IS really cute.

[@mac65graphics]

Steve buscemi on the late show

[@jamesp4521]

Lol the hand coming out to grab the RC rock

[@Most0riginalUsername]

His pun game sweeps the competition

[@FuzzyBunnyBenny]

As a Canadian I find your portrayal of us... HILARIOUS! 😂😊

[@JustinSchroeder29]

"Outrageous!!!" - Malory Archer

[@jeremywarner899]

Excellent writing I don't know what stiffening inserts r . But I've been assured I don't need them . 😂😂😂

[@aspenjade2454]

Harry Potter jokes on point 😂😂😂

[@benboehm477]

How dare you poke fun at our broom pastime, sorry?!

[@jamesbergman7371]

I love his puns. They are so good. His writers with the high five.

[@tardwrangler]

I can understand why they wouldn't want the sport to bee too easy

[@uuux1]

I can't believe he left out the "corporate bullying" angle.

[@Auriam]

Awww. Stephen and his wife must have a very happy marriage.

[@Docness777]

"Stiffening inserts" my new pick up line

[@ianpatrick3589]

Try it before you down it. Curling is no more silly than golf, where you hit a little tiny ball into a hole using a stick.

[@wilsonofcanada]

I think it is more fun to play than to watch like bowling. They used to have that on the sports channel.

[@humanonearth1]

Those brooms are doing nothing lmao.

[@zeromskilouw7156]

NAMIBIA!!! I love it when my country gets mentioned.

[@cmilla111]

One of his best segments ever, and about such an obscure topic.

[@jarehelt]

Colbert is a genius, im laughing so hard.

[@badioula]

actually shark tank is USA's version of Dragon's Den, not the other way around.... check when they both premiered

[@callumbrankin883]

My favorite part was 3:08

[@zamanmufc1715]

+Callum Brankin 6:26 for me

[@callumbrankin883]

***** Toss the baby?

[@Amenti_H]

Callum Brankin 1:34

[@Mersault26]

I'm a Canadian and I curl and watch Dragon's Den. That justmakes this so much more funny to me.

[@TheSaraeanderson]

It's about ethics in curling journalism.

[@Oblithian]

Well that much control would ruin the challenge in the throw... Unless we made it longer and added obstacles.

[@300DBenz]

Oblithian You just found a way to make watching curling interesting!

[@Oblithian]

Just wait till I tell you about the explosions.

[@nathenhutchison6182]

Well............I've been waiting. Are you going to tell me about the explosions, or what???

[@pliteni]

Stephen Colbert, you are the world’s biggest geek...and I’m LOVING IT!!!!

[@dominika3762]

A geek, in my book at least, wouldn't make fun of e-sports. Maybe he can be a traditional, more conservative geek. We younger geeks embrace e-sports too ;)

[@NjK601]

Haven't watched Shark Tank in a while but two of its biggest personalities Kevin and Robert are both Canadian..

[@Chyllstorm]

Football > Basketball > Hockey > Curling > eSports > Olympic Events > Golf > Most other Sports > Death > Baseball > Never Being Born > Soccer

[@starlinguk]

+Jaym Esch American detected.

[@Zizou19989]

We all care about your opinion

[@Chyllstorm]

Precisely! This is why you were reading the comments section, where people leave their opinions on the topic at hand. Good call!

[@Zizou19989]

Jaym Esch Nah i just go down here lookin for stupid people like you

[@OrionoftheStar]

+Jaym Esch You listed the same sport twice.