Parents Need to CHILL with Kid's Sports

Every kid's sports event seems to have at least one of those parents in the stands. While it can be super easy to get passionate about your kid's sports, being the raging parent in the stands does way more harm than good.
Today on Raising Heights with Zach and Tori Roloff we discuss the huge role sports played in bringing us together as a couple, the importance of sports for kids and the real purpose of kids' sports activities. Coaches and parents have a huge role to play in helping our kids find themselves, hone their skills and become more confident, driven individuals - we share our take on how to empower kids with love, support and play.
⚽ How soccer brought us together and why it means so much to our family
⚽ Zach and Tori’s experience in sports (and why Tori stopped playing)
⚽ Why coaches (and parents) need to support both teams and just let kids play
⚽ The true value of kids' sports
Chapters
0:00 Intro
0:42 Peaks and pits
3:49 Soccer, family, and friends
6:57 Competitive soccer and dwarfism
11:08 Sports experiences and memories
17:12 Parenting and intense sports parents
22:29 Youth sports and parental involvement
26:48 Youth sports culture
35:34 Finding the joy amidst the culture
36:52 Baseball: rules and culture
42:17 Moments beyond sports
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Connect on socials, we’d love to hear from you 📲

[@paulage1art]

LPBW (editing / scripting/ directing?) didn’t do Zach any justice! He is so much more articulate than LPBW showed the viewers. I LOVE your podcast! You both are so engaging and well spoken and great parents navigating your family in a wonderful journey. Love the open, entertaining and relaxed chats on your podcast!! 🩷

[@slngander]

Zachary, every kids soccer team would be so lucky to have you

[@baileymorton2017]

As a coach's wife in a public school, I can absolutely back you up on parents making the whole coaching experience HORRIBLE! You guys are awesome. Thanks for another great episode!

[@90spawg23]

Amy raised her boys so well. Zach is just like her. So driven and passionate.

[@Diligent-dp7gi]

IT LOOKS BETTER Coming from Zach! IT'S MANLY.

[@90spawg23]

@@Diligent-dp7gi Zach and Amy were the men of the fam yes. 😂

[@user-cq4vb5ee5b]

Ya right they lived like pigs. That house was a total mess

[@90spawg23]

@@user-cq4vb5ee5b it was lived in.

[@meggie423]

No, filthy

[@itsakittyting]

At my son's first soccer team there was a rule that if a parent shouted, even from the visiting team, then they were banned from the field for a certain amount of months and I totally agree with Zach, some parents are ridiculous and acting as if it is professional soccer instead of just a bunch of 6 years old playing for the fun of it

[@zabavnaya-xt8tb]

Tori Roloff is the best thing that happened to LPBW 💚💚💚 I'm so glad you guys have a podcast together

[@patjones5723]

Yesss 💯

[@MH-nz5pd]

Raising Heights. Yes raising kids. But also raising: expectations, standards, life goals, interpretations, skills, love, dreams, talents, experiences etc. That's my interpretation. Moving onward and upward from LPBW.

[@heatherklick3667]

I just love seeing the real Zach! So intelligent, well spoken,and just fun to listen to all day. ❤ Tori, you are a great mom and wife! ❤

[@Lagunainkspot]

My 12 yr old grandson and I are still stinging from a bad experience in football. He played for two years. The parents are nuts and act like they are playing for a scholarship. I was the team photographer so I was on the field all the time. I did the same thing for my son 20 years ago. I'm a former Marine so I'm not all that sensitive but this got me. The coach was so cruel to his own child and would encourage kids to hurt kids on the other team. He was so traumatized by this coach that he stopped playing all together. He's found Brazilian Jui Jitzu and enjoys it. Really disappointed in the adults.

[@cindibush8880]

That's just very sad.. but there are psycho coaches out there OUT FOR THEMSELVES. SO SORRY 😮😢

[@judycarlson795]

Welcome to the 60's and 70's when our kids could go to the park and play ball or whatever they wanted. Parents were not worried about "stranger danger" and just said come home for lunch and have fun!

[@cindibush8880]

Miss those days 😮😮😢

[@captivate6242]

Those parents just ruin it for EVERYBODY. 100% agree with you both on this stance. There should be a rule, rowdy parents should be escorted out and have to wait in their cars.

[@JuliaXoXoSEAL]

I get it, but who is the one to kick them out and then the poor kids suffer not having them there to watch the game. Parents just need to learn to grow up sometimes...lol xo

[@shannonpolk9366]

What is the worse is when the league begs you to coach because no one else will volunteer then they all attack you when your the only one who stepped up for not knowing exactly what your doing. I’m like then why didn’t you step up. 😂

[@Twdsuperfan2010]

At 19:58 Zac “these little leggies.”😂😂 I laughed so hard. I love these two. I look forward to every Thursday.

[@monikatorres762]

I laughed out loud to this 😂

[@sarah1984sl]

Same 😂

[@laurieblack5792]

Zack, you may be surprised about baseball when J starts to play. I had the same feeling until my grandson left soccer and started playing baseball. Now I’m hooked with baseball and throughly enjoy watching my grandson play. It is as exciting as when he played soccer. Am now a fan of baseball.

[@user-yy1zo2dq2e]

What a precious interaction between a precious couple.

[@kcotjo]

Zach you are SPOT ON with everything you say about youth sports. We own a local sporting goods store and the parents that come in and tell my husband some of their stories are unbelievable!! So many parents living vicariously through their children and wanting to re-live their past sports experience. Their little 4 yr old is going to be the next greatest player to ever live!!! And the pressure that some of these parents put their children under is so sad. My husband has heard it all. He was also a basketball referee for 20 years so he has dealt with parents endlessly. Tori and Zach keep your attitudes regarding youth sports and you will have successful children in whatever sport they want to play! As I've stated before, you are both wise beyond your years!! Thank you for another great podcast!!

[@lisad1623]

I agree with Zach, young baseball is brutal. T-ball was the worst, parents yelling "choke up on the bat" and a 5 year old about to cry, how do you choke a bat?😮

[@susantimko4811]

We always had one coach who said “don’t pull your head” I still don’t know what that means and I am an adult… the kids had no idea

[@pennyhazen4763]

M

[@bryansmith1186]

Truth be told, Zach was a better soccer player than Jeremy. Anybody who knows soccer knows this.

[@MaisesMom-ix6yi]

I'm 70 and had the opportunity to play organized sports from the 5th grade on (I attended a Catholic school which - back in those days - was the only place that had organized sports for girls). The parents rarely came to the girls' games, let alone get involved and those that did attend would NEVER engage in any of the behaviors you see now. Sportsmanship was drilled into us as much as the basic rules of the game and that carried over into parents' behavior. Years later, when my children played, that had all sadly changed and now it is far worse. Parents need to stop living vicariously through their children, support the concepts and learning opportunities presented in sports (particularly working as a team) and leave their egos behind.

[@geminifox475]

Love your story ,,, 😊

[@missymyers7043]

“I put a ring on it.” 😂😂😂He’s hysterical! Both of your laughs are infectious! Great episode.❤

[@Divinevista]

I almost skipped this episode because I didn’t think I’d enjoy hearing about sports ie. Probably mostly about Zach’s past sports experience but boy am I ever glad a listened. That was a wonderful exchange. You guys did a terrific job and Zach I learned a whole new appreciation of your coaching insights and styles and how it must have benefitted many young people. You guys really need to do more sports-related episodes now. You did a marvellous job with this subject matter. (Zach hasn’t even paid me to say all this!!!). You guys are also adapting well into the podcasting world, learning to listen to what the audience is saying in comments ie more listening, and letting each other finish thoughts and sentences. It’s very interesting to listen to each of your unique opinions which aren’t always what we expect. It helps us really learn to get to know you two individuals. Bravo 👏

[@JenD.]

Nailed this topic. I was hoping you’d talk about this. My husband coaches, and the crazy parents have absolutely ruined a sport that he has loved for almost 40 years.

[@sixbrummetts]

As a mom of a now college athlete and the wife of a coach, I agree with everything Zack is saying. When I think about the kids that played with my son when he was young and how some of the parents talked and acted it showed up in the kids and over time the kids left the game. It is so sad. Even more so in the PNW with our sport as it is small and not many kids know about it and it gets messed up because of the attitude and actions of the group ups. Let kids learn how to win and lose and have good sportsmanship.

[@mrsdig57]

I love to hear the both of you talking about the time you spend with the kid's. I'm so happy to hear that you don't believe in every kid get a trophy it does a diservice to the kid's thinking that every kid is a winner. Kid's should be able to find their niche in life something they are good at. There's no one that's going to excel in every thing they do. You are wonderful parents with level head's that's where you excel. Love to you all!❤

[@user-ob8pb7ji3e]

I think Zach is the perfect type of coach. I hated my kids in sports because if they weren’t up to par they weren’t played. Well how din you know what you will get if you don’t okay a kid. And I hated how mean the parents got. Even the kids tho, I had gone up to my son at a grade school level hockey game and asked why he wasn’t playing and a kid turned around and said “because we want to win”. Such a sad thing when you kid just wants to be in a sport to play and hang with friends.

[@user-qr9rj8bg7b]

Please Zach read this !!! You are the most common sense person ever and always have been !!!! Love you so much !

[@tampatomtom1927]

I started doing Peak and Pit in my work meetings with my team

[@lindajoyner8231]

Neighborhood parks were the best! Kids would get together to play sports and just have fun. I would love to see neighborhoods built to include decent sized parks where sports can be played. Perhaps kids would be more interested in active fun/play instead of becoming addicted to video games.

[@megsjaco]

aww I love the Muellers!!! so glad to know you guys still keep in touch!!!

[@heatherklick3667]

Zach, you were always a hero to us. So proud of you and your perseverance. Go Zach!

[@rociotineo6264]

26:00 ! This part right here. Like just quit it. Your here to facilitate practices, tie shoes and blow noses. And the fact that he is now and parent and finds it even more ridiculous is amazing lol. Love these two❤

[@jenfehr1]

You are so right. Children should not have to deal with the grown up issues parents sometimes put on them. Sports can teach kids a lot. But it should also be fun for them. Without the fun aspect.. they lose their passion for the sport. The innocence of a child is something we should nurture for as long as we possibly can. Also..You guys seem to be doing such a great job with your kiddos. You should both be incredibly proud. If there is one thing I’ve seen you guys do over and over again, it’s putting your kids/family first. Bravo to both of you!

[@joyspencer3461]

I absolutely loved when my son played baseball from the age of 5 through 17 and my daughter played softball from the age of 4 through 17. It was some of the best times of our lives. They were both amazing pitchers! My kids talk about those memories all the time. I was one of the mom’s that rooted them on but never made a seen or argued. It did nothing but hurt the kids. I coached my daughters teams for 4 years and my sons team for one. Parents can be brutal to the coach and their kids. Zach you are an amazing coach and it’s so special to be apart of your child’s journey. I ♥️♥️♥️ it!

[@user-hn9gn2qp1g]

Tori is a rock 🌟 star ❤

[@BesOner]

Awesome episode. I was one of those dad's coaching from the Sideline and kicked out of games. When I learned to just watch, I enjoyed watching my daughter play the sport she loves since she was 4. I have 1 more season left to enjoy her playing in college.

[@echolong9535]

This is one of my favorite podcasts. I'm a few years younger than your mom and my two daughters are 30 and 32. We were a softball family for over 10 years. My husband was an all-state short stop in Northern CA in his teen years, then blew out his knee and had to quit. From about 6-10, my daughters played rec ball. When they were old enough for U12, we switched to travel ball (competitive). There's a big difference in how fast the game is for sure. My husband only coached travel ball, because rec ball was so slow. Many of the kids weren't even that into it. I think their parents used the rec organization as a baby sitter. In rec ball some of the umpires were in HS, but in travel ball the umpire had to be over 18. I agree 100% about the parents being ridiculous at times. In softball, I would have to say, the worst parents were the pitcher and catcher's parents. They thought for sure their daughter was going to get a full ride scholarship and they were the best. hahaha Although the parents were difficult at times, traveling to tournaments for several years and the friendships that developed over that time were some of my greatest memories.

[@zabavnaya-xt8tb]

⭐️ Please post more often, I refresh your channel every time in hopes to see a new video

[@cindycox57]

Me too bummed it is only once a week 😅

[@janebrady1389]

I totally agree with Zachs approach to kids sports terrific family ⭐️👍

[@user-sg8tf6em5w]

You both are so REAL!!! I LOVE the way you communicate. Sending positivity, peace, love and light!!!

[@CindyVan14]

If a baseball player is forced to run from third to home and the catcher has the ball and is standing in the way the runner runs at the catcher and plows into him. The catcher has to maintain control of the ball then the runner is out. If the catcher loses the ball the runner is safe.

[@kelliteague2505]

I love Zach especially when he talks about soccer coach’s , and he is so right.

[@twinkletinkerbell5211]

Love you two! Such level headed accountable individuals! I’m not a sports person but my husband is a volunteer umpire for Little League baseball and Zach scored big with the analogy of youth sports!

[@jennifer6833]

Really enjoying the podcasts Tori and Zack. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and insights with us.

[@allyalexandre8315]

Of course we're still listening,- You're an awesome speaker and so refreshing. I love you guys as a couple... Definately a breath of fresh air ❤

[@danagantt4841]

I love you guys and how honest and down home you guys are. Talk about whatever you want. Lifes too short to keep talking about the past that you are trying to get away from. Your family is beautiful and I'll keep you all in my prayers.

[@beverlymather193]

Blessings to you Zac & Tory I am just so proud of you guys for making the decision that you did about the farm👍🏾🙏🏽

[@peggynunyabinnis1564]

I always tell anyone that has a baby, give it a good 4 years to even start feeling like yourself again! So I am thrilled that you said 2 years you're feeling good!!! You're gonna do amazing with your marathon! 💜💜💜💜❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ love you guys!!! So glad you're doing this podcast!!!

[@nancybarta8167]

4years!!!!!?????????????????Me it was about 3 months.

[@user-si6qm8jr6v]

Love the pod! Zack, you are so sweet and caring. You and Tori are the dream team!

[@imsharonl2]

I am 70 and love to listen to you both! Love the soccer talk. Looking forward to the baseball rants❤Zach my oldest played sports and also coached youth and was passionate like you. ⚽️⚾️

[@kelleypritchard]

You guys are amazing! I appreciate your hard work and honesty.

[@karynd1756]

You guys brought back many memories of my boys playing sports. I miss those days. We had FUN! Thank you!!

[@jodilucas1408]

Really loving your podcast and sharing your lives in a different format. Have always admired you both! Keep up the great work! ❤

[@alymader]

I love your rants and I loved this episode! My husband and I coach a youth basketball team and see just how crazy youth sports has become. We've watched parents get kicked out of tournaments. We've watched coaches get kicked out of games and then argue with the tournament host. It's insane!

[@philoakley221]

Love your podcast! Zach, when you laugh it’s contagious. Brings a smile to my face. Many parents could learn a lot from both of you. Keep it up!

[@Zimvo2007]

Thank you... we needed this conversation

[@kellyemerson997]

Listened to the very end and loved every minute of this!! Love Zach’s take on kids sports ⚽️⚾️

[@djr6876]

Ive watched Zack on these podcasts and I like his humbleness and his realistic approach to life. Really down to earth guy.

[@Annette1965]

OMG I love this podcast so much! I feel it’s the real you rather than what we seen on TV. Y’all look really relaxed. I wish the episodes were longer or you did maybe 2 a week! Can’t wait for the next one! ❤

[@skyangelthefan]

I’m a Nurse, I was taught in Nursing school and from my own personal experience…Text book wise it takes 1 year after a baby is born for the organs inside of the Mother to go back to their original position than another year for the hormones to reregulate to one person and the 3rd year is just over-all the body, mind and life adjusting. If, the hormones do no reruglate to what they were the body goes into limbo shock and post-partum can last longer than 3 year’s. Great podcast/video.

[@baytobaystyles8379]

I think this was my favorite episode so far, I am a high school swim coach and my husband coaches our daughter in soccer, basketball and softball. Definitely sharing this with him. Thank you both!

[@user-gh2fo9pw2b]

I love Zachs passion and Tori is awesome❤❤ I look forward to your podcasts and so glad you started them! Almost at 100k subs, yayyyy, congrats!!! Enjoy your weekend!

[@MsLally5]

you guys are so fun to listen to...I used to have that kind of energy.

[@iluvphillip13]

Great episode! You are doing a wonderful job, both with family life AND with sharing your parenting practices, plus always open to learning more. I shared your prior episode with one of my daughters (who has 3 young boys & a little girl who reminds me so much of Lila) and my niece (2 toddler boys), where Tori brings up the "Get to vs. have to" and they both enjoyed it a lot. Thank you!

[@ms_mommy3689]

Another great episode. I also love the way Zach thinks. So level headed and sensible.

[@kellybdarr1960]

This was great , you are really a great influence on young parents!

[@pamelacoffos6288]

Love all your podcasts. Yes Zach I was here to the very end and enjoyed it. 😊

[@Kirstenmarie37]

I absolutely loved this podcast episode! As an avid lover of soccer and youth sports, I found what Zach said so relatable. Thank you for your insight! I would totally listen to a soccer podcast by Zach! Go for it!

[@daleclark8872]

Loved this episode…love them all. I could listen to you guys for hours…seriously! I love to hear your views on all topics. You have a beautiful family and you are great parents!! 🙏❤️🙏

[@juanitawalker4836]

I love watching the two of you, you're both great. I totally agree with Zach on this whole topic of sports and parnets..... Keep up the great work Zach..... 💖💖💖💖

[@Eblanusa9571]

So nice to hear you speak of other family members

[@jessie4737]

Good Morning Roloffs!!❤ Love seeing ur faces!! Have a great week!!! ❤❤❤

[@amybrooks3783]

Love this conversation about this topic, can relate. Thank you. Fun.

[@lornamiley7030]

Love everything about this episode!!

[@tdshopper]

Loved this podcast and listening to all of them. I really like your perspective on kids playing and letting them be kids ❤️🇨🇦❤️

[@tammycarlos1500]

Love your perspective on youth sports. Very insightful.

[@pattysommers3566]

Great podcast. Love watching you two.

[@Diligent-dp7gi]

You TWO are such a Natural in your POD CAST. Your style and communication with each other is the BEST!! : ) : )

[@trueballofwax3077]

No zoning out here!! I watch all your videos to the end! I love you both!! Zach you are so smart about sports which serve you so well as a Dad! TX you two!!!

[@lynnrussell9337]

Kudos to the two of you for being such great parents! I enjoy your podcasts.

[@lindarice8876]

Yep,I was listening to the end....love you guys, keep ranting Zach, keep on runnin' girl

[@rosalindamartinez2201]

Your comcast is pure and real life. So great to hear you both❣️❣️

[@rebeccahorn8418]

I didn’t tune out! I TOTALLY agree with Zac!! Preach it Zac!

[@jerisharpe906]

Good vlog, just not long enough. Love you two, beautiful kids. Happy Easter & God's Blessings to you & your family & friends.❤❤

[@beckythomas9780]

It is 1:27am and I am binge watching you...And You both Rock!!! As Parents...As mentors... As Human Beings who Give God Glory for Your Holsomness...Keep doing this and sharing your lives with People who have No normalty in their lives!!!

[@galedobschuetz4007]

Your podcast makes me smile. I enjoy it.😊

[@daniellewinning7385]

Loved this! You can tell Zach was in the zone for this and as a first time sports parent this spring I loved hearing it! Gotta give baseball a chance though Zach! 😂As a baseball lover myself it sounds like you're going to also love the game once Jackson gets a few games in! You're already talking strategy and you don't even know it! ❤

[@debrahartzel2486]

Really enjoy your podcasts!

[@normafleming2518]

I love that your shows are just natural family things. No false veneers.

[@cherylthompson941]

Love these!

[@marissafarias735]

I'd totally listen to your soccer podcast, Zac! Go for it! 😊🙌🏽

[@mysticmimi3924]

Oh my gosh, I can totally vibe Zach with the so slow sport. My daughters went from volleyball and one year my youngest went to softball, and I was so bored and blessed that it only lasted one year.

[@susancarr4241]

Very good. Love you guys. Look forward to Thursdays.

[@annaleefinch7266]

LOVE ❤️ your podcasts. Viewer/subscriber from Virginia

[@tracybrazel2156]

Favorite podcast so far and I don't even like sports! I love the message and you're right on the mark!

[@AaleciaA]

Most relatable podcast I’ve listened to. Have watched LPBW since it aired and so glad you guys aren’t leaving us forever. I enjoy your topics and discussions surrounding them. Food for thought: Tori interrupts Zach enough that I find myself hanging onto the things he’s saying, hoping he gets to finish. 🙊 Nothing major, I still enjoy listening…. Excited for more to come!

[@missymyers7043]

Best podcast ever! I played soccer in HS played halfback and forward; it was a boys sport and in 1980 was on the first girls HS team. I never played a sport in my life and decided to try out and made varsity as a freshman. I would have played college but they didn’t have women’s soccer scholarships back then and couldn’t afford college. BUT I loved every bit of it. In my early 20’s I coached the youth league but after a few years left because of the cray cray parents. They ruined it. Loved this conversation, brought back great memories.

[@user-cs8oj7hj3v]

I totally agree with you Zack! my kids are much older now, but still recall a time when my son played soccer (for fun) and the coach was obsessed with winning, and therefore played his favorite's while my son sat on the side line, until of course I marched over to the other side of the field...immediately he put my son on!

[@juliespady]

I really like this podcast. I love listening to you two. Love Zach’s philosophy on coaching. I have a 9 year old granddaughter that is loving soccer. She’s not great but she tries. Practices start this week. I hope her coach is like Zach. We are in Banks.

[@sheilabradley2892]

Hey, I didn't tune out -- I listened to the whole thing! 😊 Any kids would be lucky to have you coach them, Zach!

[@deborahjansson]

I love all of your podcasts! My son was born in the early 80’s. The kids had to tryout, they weren’t automatically on a team. Trophies were still given to the winning team. My son was asked to jump up to a more advanced team because he was a really talented baseball player. I put my foot down and told the coaches he was staying in his age bracket. I had a ton of fun being a baseball mom! Now his son is playing baseball , and I’m right there on the bleachers! 😊

[@jillh.9617]

Zach, you’re awesome! Such brilliant insight about adults “facilitating” a game among children.

[@texastoast1825]

I love when Zach is allowed to talk. His thoughts & ideas are good.