which one of your videos explains how to convince the narc they need help?

If you cannot set the outer world in relation. Subject and object thinking IS underdeveloped and you become paranoid. Thanks for explaining. The lack of empathy as well. But IT makes IT hard for the non NPdler. As normal person you cannot go that deep. You have to protect as well yourself

first you have to protect yyourself. set boundaries. bring empathie to the abuser without protecting yourself is a goal. but i am a human and not divine

he don't lack, he don't care.

Love is the answer, and it must flow all directions. I can't stand video titles out there. No, I dont want to know how to get revenge. I love them ❤ and I have started showing myself some of that love as well. I don't want anything but good for them. They have suffered enough at the world's hands, and at their own hands. I have always felt desperately ill inside when hearing that I will know I've healed when I become indifferent. I don't want to be indifferent. I want to always love them. Forever. And I want to feel loved myself. And I'm the one that can love ALL of us, even if they can't. I have three narcissists and a two borderlines I will love until the end of time. I am only in (limited) contact with one. And one has passed on.

Thank you Dr. Mark🥲 Your videos are so on point!.. I've absorbed a {lot} of info about npd, so I rarely get new insights.. but in every video... you somehow deliver substantial insights where I'm learning new things. Love your patient compassionate vibe

Thank you.

Thank you. Those are very good document.

You may want to check out Sam Vakin, he is a malignant narc.He speaks of introjects in great depth,trigger warning for anyone recovering, his sadism is apparent in many of his videos,microaggressions and such,nevertheless some real insights

Narcissism is a spiritual sickness.

children are narcisstic and become reflexive and matura with puberty. Some do not.

Does this mean I can become a mathematician without the intellectual abilities?

Immaturity cannot be healed. Is a lack of intelligence as well.

Thank you.

Not only do they know what they are doing Dr., they also check whether it is working or not. If it does not work to the level they want, then they ramp up the abuse. If they did not know what they are doing, they would just resort to many random different acts without following up on the effect. My thoughts.

Hey Dr., "The topic of narcissistic abuse tends to be highly charged and people tend to have extremely strong feelings about it". Correct, because the impact on the victim is extensively damaging and often fatal. As human beings we have a strong instinct for survival and self preservation and therefore narcisstic abuse being an existential threat, warrants for the reaction it gets from normal people who just want to make the best out of their time here on earth.

This is the clearest, most comprehensive and accessible explanatory overview I've come across yet. Thank you! The inclusion of referencing the ways the defences and characterists appear in NPD vs other personality disorders provided useful distinctions. I really appreciated the tone of the video, which I found neutral/objective to sympathetic - not accusatory and filled with personal slights towards anyone dealing with these issues through no fault of their own, as many videos on the subject matter can be (as was even referenced here more than once). The only thing I would've liked more of is examples. Ie more description of the way these defences and characterists look on the ground. To add that extra layer beyond saying, for eg, a person may swing from grandiose to devaluing self image and behaviours, to include explamples of what they might say or do to themselves or others in these states. But really, the content of this video, and the clear way it is assembled and presented is Top Notch!!!

Thank you !

The one considering NPD not a mental illness make the grand entry in the mental illness kingdom, you're are now one of us but the dangerous one, the one in denial, in fear, in panic.

run

YOU are incredibly good at educating us in this topic. Why haven’t you gone viral yet?!?!

Masterson called it a defense.

I love this paradigm and the inverse proportionality insight.

That was lovely. This is the source. I think I saw or heard Diana Diamond refer to research showing there could be a "turning away" from the care giver for neglectful, misattunement, or other constructs forming within the child's object dyads? So, some children turn to detaching on their own?

Thank you so much for this video! Fantastic explanation. Subscribed. My goodness, this was life changing.

This is the first content I’ve seen from this channel but I am very impressed by how comprehensive and organized the information is. I have always had issues with the commonly presented duality of “narcissists versus empaths” and actually didn’t expect to find such a granular explanation that even involves developmental aspects of personality traits. …and I’m only about 4 minutes in. 😮

When the people you love's only passion toward you is destroying you because you authentically represent their feigned representative.

This is good information and I'd like to challenge my information silo so I'm subscribing. I have a sibling who I think has this and being his shadow dump has been rough. My experience and observations click when I hear the psychoanalytic work so I like it when channels bring this deep understanding instead of barely informed rants marketed as therapy. Also big thanks for taking the time to acknowledge the victim's pain. Dr Lindsay Gibson was saying acknowledging the pain it caused helps people move on. The chronic invalidation from family and society is why compassionate views and bandaid fixes are so hard to hear.

You are fulfilling a much needed niche as the previous commentor commented.. I compliment you!

Phillip Zimbardo said only two percent of people recover from this sh_t.... and to do that you have to become really smart, towards that end I thank you for your contribution

Ramani is right, they have some empathy but it is overridden by their love of absolutely terrorizing, perverting, murder threatening harmless people like me they LOVE hurting people and easily will kill if they can/could get away with it. That's why they KILL your very soul instead and they have ZERO REMORSE. Try to tell them anything and you are met with more intense terror and death threats.. that's what they are, they are death threat animals, that is their complete total fun joy and pleasure, narcissist OR psychopath?? They abuse and IF POSSIBLE threaten to kill or murder everyone they can get away with it!!! To late I'm already screwed, they should be treated like they treat others.. thanks for your response, this stuff is raw.. I'm healing really, insight.. now years and years later.. decades taken from me by these people

You obviously didn't thru fortune have to be victim as I was to a m____fer___ who was constantly terrorizing me abusing me and threatening to KILL ME. YEAH their just sick, yeah threatening to kill helpless people is just a little mental health problem!!!!!!!!!!:((

Wow. I think, for me it just clicked how personality development works at a very deep level. Thanks! Much more helpful than PD labels as npd, bpd or what have you. (Have long been wondering if they don't actually all essentially share the same root cause)

The morally grandiose, self righteous tirades people comment on this channel are a cosmic level irony considering the subject matter.

Thank you for mentioning the empathy thing! I struggle with fluctuating empathy because of BPD and NPD combined and it’s strange to see people make such huge generalizations about things that everybody experiences differently

Well done doc.. Giving hope to cluster b,s to be able the learn themselves out of it.. Facinatingly refreshing talk.. Giving hope like a abc path.. impressive

7:00 when Identity Diffusion happens, its not just the time needed to seperate, its the time thats A LITTLE EXTRA that makes partners see that they are both living in the shadowcycle of negative schema storms that can only be solved with meds lol

I sure appreciate your rational take on NPD. It's a breath of fresh air.

I am more interested in knowing if there are any records of narcissists ever recovering in ANY way at all, beyond coping with it.

A highly competent overview of personality styles. Still it’s an Ivy Tower, bookish narrative that has academic significance but offers little empathy for those of us struggling with the abusive treatment victims of say people with NPD inflict on the individuals they work and live with. I do not appreciate the use of the word “style” in a discussion of personalities, as in the term personally style. Style is a far too forgiving even neutral or biased term in the field of psychology. . In reality, a style is usually a particular way of dress or to create music. When applied to mental health it tends to suggest that the condition is not to be taken very seriously-that the disorder is harmless. Why not use instead a phrase like “personality formation” or “personality modality” or “personally constitution”? The scientific orientation of the doctor’s discussions seems to ignore the reality of the great harm personality disordered people inflict on others and possibly even on themselves. While erudite the doctor’s approach to psychological study in this video is at once informative and yet cold especially in the context of such a popular platform as YT where viewers tend to look for quick. feel good solutions to problems.

thanks for the "to the point" info.

There are examples of psychotic and hating immigrants. But isn’t it possible to have psychotic tendencies against anyone who isn’t in their chosen group. So there is herding with their group and view any outsiders as bad. So on the political spectrum, both extremes are likely psychotic.

Bcuz, deep down... they know they have deceived and cheated their way through life, and therefore nave no internalized sense of integrity?

As they used to say in the TV show Dragnet, 'Just the facts, ma'am' - I love your straight forward and informative style. Thank you!!

Yes, this makes sense because of reaction formation and the false self. Whatever you see on the surface is actually an expression of its opposite. Making it easy to see why relationships go south pretty quickly. Almost like people need a Rosetta Stone to communicate with us.

I like how the different strands that have been flowing all over cyberspace are explained in a structured and cohesive way. Builds knowledge as well as allow confidence that NPD can be understood to a certain extent. This is coming from a frustrated longtime victim of NPD sibling(s) who exhibit both vulnerability and grandiosity! You have given me a foothold understanding minus the alienating that characterises most channels. The last bit about Witnessing ie making the narcissist feel Seen and Listened to, is gold. That applies to almost everyone-the need for validation but narcissists need it as they needed oxigen.

Okay, but you have to admit, we shouldn't be coddling these people who have no empathy, remorse, nor conscience. You can't blame anyone for not liking them or wanting to be around them.

I agree with this assessment of Narcissistic Personality Disorder, describing it as being a mental illness, and explaining why.

This is a l l Republicans with trump. You don't even have to say the word, I see them in this a mile away!

The "Am I good, am I loved, am I safe...Yes! " picture was really something ❤️