Fear of abandonment for me wasn't about being alone - I do it plenty and have companions. It's about not being prioritized, not being chosen, not being important enough to someone that they choose you. The core was more about a sense of worth and viewing myself that way, then external results followed.

What about someone who dissociates when seeing good looking people. Is that a sax or corn addict?

Whenever I see someone with trauma get validation and comfort, I resent the traumatized person and see them as weak and attention-seeking. Even if they went through something genuinely awful. Nobody has ever given me that affection before or told me that I mattered. Even now sometimes I hate hearing people talk about their traumas with me and get me to empathize or pity them, because I know damn well if I talk about mine nobody would care or try to listen. My go-to reaction is to make fun of them or tell them they're pathetic. I don't say it out loud anymore, but I still think it...not exactly a good shoulder to cry on.

I have a video on my channel about a possible better treatment for people with DID. I do mention the dark truth about DID being a man-made disorder.

porous emotional boundries .... hyperreactivity and/or shutting down.....

Gives me hope for theraphy and healing. ❤

Can a 71 yo affected by early childhood loss and abandonment (parent died suddenly) be "coached" to have healthy attachments?

For those who say they meet abusive people with DID. I have been abused tortured by someone with DID bad. I also have DID. This person understands there disorder and how to manage it and decided for some reason to traumatize and abuse me further and spiritually abuse. The most horrible thing they did for abuse is tell me I don’t have it while exploiting me and breaking me down and calling an ambulance on me so I got diagnosed with other disorders. I need help so bad and a safe place. I live in Connecticut where there’s pretty much no help for someone like me because they have held on too the old diagnosis. And the disorder stops you from getting into shelters. Heavy medications have replaced therapy. I wanted to put some videos up. For outreach. And for people who have been hurt by those with DID I am sorry. I have DID more severe from having no support and people being just plain cruel. The mental health system is so broken so it’s near impossible to get the right kind of help. Some people go to ministers but so many’s of them want money and don’t help the right way nor do care about how you feel. They don’t want to hear about your fears or trauma they just want scream at spirits 🤷‍♀️or push there little proficiencies on you

I have a client who I think will benefit from this 😊 thank you for the short, helpful videos!

Thank you! Very helpful.

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Ah wow this was such a great explanation ❤🙌 thanks so much for sharing these short, to thepont , easy to understand explanations by dr Levine 🙌 they give me understanding while also a senseof calm and hope. Love the little gadges he uses to explain things too, great for visual learners and hels remember what hesaid ❤❤

willing hands AND a half-smile together; facial expressions alone can change our emotions

When I am spacing out - the times I have been able to force a rewind, it was another me at the front but dealing with some internal memory or worry usually. It is hard to rewind though - it takes a lot of energy and kinda hurts.

How do we access this locked energy at home ourselves?

I like the slow approach as my experiences with therapy has a few where they went way fast into EMDR with alters, etc. Too, I have found that I have issues giving my psychiatrist honest feedback as a specific alter jumps in to keep everything even as we are often afraid of admitting our true state. My current therapist wisely is going slow and using talk therapy mostly to stabilize my system.

okay but what if your boss tells you that your not good enough isnt that a fact though ?

Thanks! I don’t think i had trauma, I think in my case it might be genetic like I’m just slow (cognitive disengagement syndrome/ chronic fatigue). I could never keep up as a child (i run slowly, can’t tolerate an adrenaline rush, struggle with tasks my peers can do easily (also AuDHD), miss jokes and social cues etc) so that could count as trauma with a little t I guess. I take stimulant medication to help with activation but i can’t handle a lot of it (i get overstimulated and overwhelmed quickly and then stay stuck between me trying to shut down and the long acting meds doing their own thing) Anyway thanks for the recommendations with hand stretching and temperature sensations - i try to do a cold swim in the mornings as well. therapy didn’t really work out for me as it relied too much on visualisation strategies (aphantasia) and memory recall (poor).