One issues is, if you handle it wrong, you can seem to be the aggressor and then make things worse. But these things need to be out. Psychological abuse is hard to see for the victim, takes time. I was told I was crazy when I spoke about these things, for myself, when younger. But now these videos show that I was thinking right, that I was being mentally abused. The problem was that my abusers were the ones that told me that I reading into things, that I was crazy, that I was exaggerating. My abusers sent me for help. My first psychiatrist wasn't interested in abuse from my boss or parents, he was only there to fix me. But now I've recently shared all my historical abuse with my current psychologist, who is shocked but finally happy now that the full story is coming out. And now, for the first time in 20 years, I am actually really starting to heal. The medication was symptomatic, but now with the truth coming out, and a better dr and terminology (I never had the words for this stuff before), I can discuss and heal properly, and get away from those cruel idiots.

After listing to this, I think I am married to a narcissist husband. I'm on 2x anticipation medications and must always hear that I need to do more positive thinking and get out of my depression. We are married for 21 years.

My husband of fifty years was diagnosed just a few years before his death. When he passed away I was in shock and almost non functioning for months. The anger was trauma itself. You haven't spoken about these emotions much.

Ya, some of those become politicians.

I married two of these[ also have other psychos in family as well]

My mother hates me, and shows every bit of it. My mother passes me aside and my golden child sister gets all the glory and recognition. I’ve lost my relationship because of my mom. I’ve had to restart my life and she’s still in my life bullying me at 32 yrs old I have a child of my own and she’s constantly not allowing me to be a mom, take over everything smh have no clue what to do.

Some people make it very easy to become indifferent. You have to have a period of no contact, then you can’t bothered.

I noticed that of I ask my mother a direct question she is deeply offended. You aren’t allowed to defend yourself either when a glade accusation is thrown out

🕊🌎🕊🕊sharing🫂thankYOU

That last part hit so hard. I was the scape goat and my sister was the golden child. I have fared FAR better as an adult, while she is still stuck in that same cycle. Thank for the video

I now see *charm* as either an amber flag or a red flag if it's excessive. Thank you, Darren, much appreciated. Have a good week.

I married 2 of these

Narcissists truly believe they are God 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

My father was a malignant narcissist which set me up for similar partners like my last one, who was also a psychopath 🤦‍♀️ my first college boyfriend was identified in a famous book about the Son of Sam by Maury Terry. He was a talented investigative journalist who fingered Vladimir Lunis, a Russian emigre, as the likely person who paid another young Russian to kill his girlfriend, a Barnard College coed named Virginia…. I read the book 40 years later & realized.that I was his next target 👩 but I got away after a year of abuse. Now I know what happened to a young girl who couldn’t save herself ❤️‍🩹

Do they ever act like victims when held accountable?

Circumcision is mutilation. Please do a show on how ze butchers brainwashed a whole society to do permanent mental damage to boys and the perversion behind this sick procedure!

Also available on most podcast platforms

for a period in my life i became narcissistic and my behaviour led to a mortification experience. it was eye opening, and since then (5 years ago) ive cut out all that behavior. everyone has narcissistic traits but i let mine go out of hand. i was still a teenager at the time with no real world experience, but i was pulled back down to earth very quickly - and thank god. social media was like a drug to me

Will anything break through a narcissist’s goal of destabilizing their victim psychologically? I had to let my narcissistic soon to be ex wife know of the death of a family member. Someone she had known and liked for over 30 years. Her response was to just walk away without a word. I can only assume her intention when behaving like this was somehow to try to hurt me. Is this just typical and to be expected or is it an extreme example of narcissistic behavior?

8:50 isolatinh you

Alienated mom here wondering how to save my son.

Vvv

How about a video which explores in detail how someone can be turned into having narcissistic traits, or a full blown malignant narcissist?

This feels familiar.

7:50

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I am finally realizing so much about our my dad. I always thought I was a daddy’s girl. But looking back I can see the manipulation and the narcissistic behavior. How he treated my mom and made her look like the crazy and abusive one. He had her feeling so miserable that she couldn’t be a real mother to us. Now she is remarried and she is so different… because she is treated with kindness. My dad now only calls me when he needs something. Usually money. The last time we spoke was over a month ago. I wouldn’t give him $300. He hung up on me. I’ve tried to call him a few times since then just to check on him. He won’t answer the phone. Using guilt and playing the victim is his favorite thing. I’ve been told I’m a terrible sister (I’m the oldest out of three girls). I love my money too much (I own a business and have worked hard for everything I have). I think I’m better than anyone else. On and on… There have been times when he has told me he is proud of me and I believe I believe he really meant it. But he always expected something from me too. People have always loved my dad. He would give them the shirt off his back. But he would always do for others and leave my mom crying alone in the house. He acted like he was the kindest and friendliest person to everyone… and people would think my mom was just crazy because she would be so distraught and couldn’t control her emotions. He weaponized that against her. In recent years I’m realizing all of this about my dad. 😢

Darren, spot on as usual. Thanks for your consistent professional videos...always top-notch.

I am guilty of having long period during depression or unconscious frustration where I act like that. It is really awful...

This is one of your best. You described my path. I have said several times now that Dr. Ramani helped save my life! I You Darren came later. I also want to put a shout out to dr. Carter and Terri Cole

Wow, when did you meet my parents?🧐

Aww .. we finally catch a glimpse of the infamous Freud 💯💯💯

Thank you! Very informative!

Women's tears are the most effective form of DARVO I've ever encountered.

The person that marketed me getting stalked used revenge porn, and they persistently go through my history using my conscience to convince others its justified, constantly immaturely trolling, feeling threatened over my happiness or when I try to report the stalking, and then the people who enable use any misogynistic example to convince others that the stalking/abuse is moral/"teaching them a lesson" ironically they're the ones who commit a crime out of their sadistic needs, bc they can't be happy unless they compare my unhappiness to theirs.

I'm in the doubting myself phase right now. I'm experiencing every single one of these to a certain degree literally at this moment. In the trenches... But that's OK. If you name them, it hurts them. Like demons. Stay strong Kings.

My MIL on Christmas morning (2022), "I'm sorry..... I didn't know you were telling me the truth about your abusive childhood. You didnt tell me how bad it was. That is why I didnt believe you and told the rest of the in-laws that you were lying about your childhood to gain attention. I didnt know it really happened to you. Your mom told me everything about the abuse, and your stepdad started yelling at her while she was on the phone, saying how you deserved all the abuse he did to you. I had no idea..... Your mom told me about your real dad going to prison because he molested your big sister, and how you haven't seen your dad since you where five years old. I didnt know. Why didnt you tell me the extent of it?" Me, "I did tell you. I didnt tell you the full extent of the trauma and abuse I experienced during childhood and SURVIVED because I didnt think it was necessary. BTW, part of the reason why I didnt know I had Ankylosing Spondylitis for decades, the genetic disease you told family I was faking, was because I don't know my dad or that side of the family, and AS and the gene marker for AS is hereditary on the father's side of the family." MIL, "Oh........" I went No Contact with MIL and in laws, November 2023, as they continued to doubt my medically diagnosed autoimmune disease, Ankylosing Spondylitis and being immunocompromised. I will not submit myself to be around those who doubt my autoimmune disease and being immunocompromised, being Immunocompromised means I get sick easily. A cold can land me in the hospital. In the past, MIL and in-laws have told me a cold or flu was "allergies" during their visit, and I would get extremely sick. I am not abandoning myself. My husband is supportive of my boundaries, believes in me and the Ankylosing Spondylitis I manage, and now also managing and healing C-PTSD..... My husband also supports me being No Contact. He is still in contact with his mom and family, which can be difficult emotionally for the both of us...... Yet, husband has stopped helping his mom with every beckoning phone call, and has started to create boundaries with his mom.

Pray for astranged children and innocent parents.4 generations cause of this disrespectful abuse.

Dear Darren, thank you so much for your videos on the topic of narcissistic mothers. I can deeply empathize with the mentioned situations and see many parallels to my own experience. In my late 20s, I have been seeing a psychologist in Germany for 2 years. Unfortunately, the term "narcissism" was never mentioned in the context of my maternal relationship. It wasn't until I turned 40 and had a pivotal experience that I first read about this issue. I'm astonished that this topic isn't discussed more openly in society. I suspect this is due to the idealized portrayal of motherhood? The status of being a mother is often considered sacrosanct, and critical discussions are avoided to protect this sacred image - acc. to me. For this reason, I am grateful for your educational efforts. It's crucially important to talk openly about this subject. The impact of a narcissistic mother can cause severe psychological strain. I myself nearly broke under the pressure and had to first understand and recognize the psychological ordeal I had endured and understand that finally it wasn‘t my fault … to start my life.

Good God, this settles it!!! To be a democrat is to be a narcissist. Wakeup people. Government is the ultimate means of control it is a magnet for narcissists. President Trump has been exposing this for almost 8 years.

My daughter grandmother my mother is a pervert narcissist abuses me my entire 58 years I. Life now it the turn of my daughter she is 23 it hurts

I could happily listen to you lecture on the lifecycle of the common gnat with that luscious accent. Yum!😋

A relationship built on mutual love, respect, mutual consideration, is beautiful. Become better versions of ourselves. But it has to be mutual. Otherwise the sht partner turns into a sht show. Marriage isnt bad, but people make it bad.

This is amazing…. Thank you so much! So helpful.

Heyoka Empath: the mirror of truth Personal experience: Heyokas often find themselves in situations where they blurt out something unexpected, causing people to laugh or think deeply about their words. They have a talent for breaking emotional barriers with wit and humor.

Love the way you talked to and treated your lovely dog. You are simply a treasure of a man. ❤

If I go to an affair or birthday party, etc. and my adult Narc child acts like she always does, I win. Because I know in advance that she will never change and that there is no hope. So when she acts as awful as I know she will to me, I win. Then, I take myself out for a nice iced coffee treat. I’ve had a lot of iced coffees in my life, unfortunately. : )

Mother was narcisist who lied to my father upon arriving home from work with the days abuse I had heaped on her, when I would come home from playing her would rush out of the house whipping out his thick leather belt and beat me all over bare legs and arms from very young age to about 12. I never knew what she said but I also never told my father I never said or did anything. I didn't figure this out until I was 70. I just remember her in the kitchen window smiling as he struck me. I was quiet because you do this to survive. You learn early to compartmentalize this so you can eat at dinner. No eye contact. Get out of the house ASAP into the street and play and scream like mad. Survival. Normal. Normal for many of us.

I love Darren ❤ 🇦🇺👍