Can You REPAIR a Relationship After CHEATING? - TWR Podcast #85

[@vincentg1220]

If you’re young and don’t have any commitments between each other like children, just leave! End of story

[@arieichner5409]

wrong. When your young is when you mess up and learn how to forgive/grow before you live your whole life in bitterness.

[@WilliamRyan-h2y]

I love the humor and banter involved. It makes these topics so much more digestible!

[@Fredrickwayde]

The videos are very helpful, more and more people need to be educated on the topic.

[@khoakdoan]

I emotionally cheated and I truly regret it. I don't know why I did it. I loved my girlfriend and I was truly committed to her. For some reason, my insecurity and my lack of confidence got the best of me. My ex texted me and I responded with white lies about my relationship. I didn't even mean it but I did it. I made a choice at the end of the day and i take accountability and responsibility of my actions. I hurt her and her family.

[@bittehiereinfugen7723]

If you cheated on her, you definitely didn't feel committed to her. At least not in a healthy or appropriate way. And when you're in a relationship and you tell lies about your relationship or your partner to outsiders, those lies are never white. This is a malicious act.

[@JamieHirschfield-r9g]

7:11 ​@@bittehiereinfugen7723

[@JamieHirschfield-r9g]

7:27

[@DentistN]

I really need to ask you this because I have no one else to ask so my boyfriend of two years I found out almost 3 to 4 times that he was lying at me once that he disappeared for three months for the wrong reason didn’t tell me the real reason which I’m not mad about and the other one was that he was texting a girl, one of his classmates in university While telling me that he never looks any girls way and he’s all of that a man, knowing that the girl likes him and the third one was a month ago I caught him watching a girl on TikTok showing off her body and something like that while he is the one that’s telling me to cover up and do not show my body, but that’s some big double standards and now I’m trying to make it work out, but I don’t really know if that’s gonna happen because we both really do love each other so much like so much two years of constant being melting into each other’s feelings, but those things make me question everything about him help me out just tell me what should I do? Does he really love me if I wanna heal how do I do it and on my points making sense are those things really cheating?

[@Mw3SwagZone]

After 2 years of being with a women of my dreams, slowly started to put her on a pedestal. She decides to end the relationship, I let it be and one week later she says she wants to work on things but isn’t ready to commit back yet, we make great progress over a month. Just last night I confronted her as she was walking into her apartment with another man at 1am

[@synx7874]

She belongs to the streets

[@Liljoozy]

So she didn't cheat since you weren't in a committed relationship...

[@Karina_Engr]

32:31 this part right here. Some of wonder why…and we’re here with the kids, bills, needing to make a new life with all the broken pieces. 😢

[@albertodeulofeu5277]

I never thought I’d do it. But I did. And I hurt the only person that’s ever genuinely cared about me. Although it was meaningless in hindsight, it wasn’t to her and that’s all that matters. So now I guess she’ll take her chances with someone new who either won’t do it, or won’t get caught. My words didn’t matter. My tears didn’t either. My apology was meaningless. And I can’t blame her. It made me happy to see this video though, you confirmed what I thought was necessary to keep it together. And I did all of the right things. I was transparent. Honest. Truly and sincerely remorseful. But I’m only one half of the equation. She couldn’t get past it.

[@gratefulheart5454]

Work on your character. Because cheating is a deep character flaw within yourself. Expecting the victim to get over it because you regret it is another character flaw on your part. I cheated once in my twenties and never did it again because it was such a a huge loss and realized I never wanted to be a piece of trash that could victimize someone else again.

[@kristina4395]

​@@gratefulheart5454 looking down on someone and bring self-righteous are even bigger character flaws

[@gratefulheart5454]

@@kristina4395 cheating is wrong. No way around it and it is a character flaw. So too bad it hurt your feelings.

[@kristina4395]

​@@gratefulheart5454 projecting is wrong also... Its interesting how you use cheating being wrong to try to validate your even worse behaviour 👍

[@gratefulheart5454]

@@kristina4395 you're saying cheating is not wrong and it bad for me to say that is internal and takes personal responsibility to change lol. Ok I'm done with you. Wear a jimmy, weirdo lol.

[@ariannarp6866]

This ticks ALL the boxes I am going through. I found out a month ago, my husband carried out a 1 1/2 year affair. I am devastated. How does one navigate a long term scenario? Not just a one night stand. He actually travelled to see her and paid to have her travel to our city. Cost our family over 20k and I was blamed for needing to pay bills and mortgage payments bouncing.

[@albertodeulofeu5277]

Men are different from you. Your husband does not love you any less. As hard as that is to understand. That’s why he’s still your husband. The human animal, has never, and will never be an innately monogamous one like geese. Men specifically, aren’t wired to be only with one woman at a time. And women themselves aren’t wired to be with just one man long term (which is why women always end up unhappy). Now that doesn’t mean self restraint isn’t a thing. It is, and should definitely be exercised. But just know that your husband does not love you any less. If he is truly remorseful, he is so because of the way it affected you. Not because of the act itself. In his mind subconsciously, he doesn’t see it the way you do. If he is truly remorseful, and he’s embarrassed and ashamed, and says it won’t happen again, believe him this once.

[@ariannarp6866]

@@albertodeulofeu5277 I can’t agree on ‘how he’s wired’. I’ve uncovered so much more. He was always so jealous of anyone who talked to me, even. The affairs started 6 years ago and he had zero intention of telling me. He’s sorry he got caught and he had an amazing, FAITHFUL woman. 😞

[@Koshiemobo]

​@@albertodeulofeu5277 I don't want to seem like I'm attacking you but please don't push your ideology on people.

[@Vriskh4oj]

Cheating destroys people, leaves marks mentally and physically, bad bad. If you love someone you wouldn't want to hurt them in any way

[@ariannarp6866]

@@albertodeulofeu5277 turns out he was a serial, deviant, narcissistic cheating liar. He’s demented and destroyed our family. There will never be forgiveness

[@amandabutler4070]

😊 very nice and great effort to not editing out the hard to deal with stuff 🤭

[@Guidancewithgrace777]

Please account for narcissistic and sociopathic people. Don’t give hope to those who are in a pathological relationship. I decided to work it out… a year later I found out he was secretly doing it again. All the while lying to me. I walked away knowing I worked on myself, on my marriage, forgave, marriage therapy, take the blame - that’s the hard part… he made me believe I was the problem. I am currently going through a divorce and I couldn’t be happier. He lost a good one and I now I get to love myself and move on!!

[@andrerodriguez966]

Well my partner took full ownership and responsibility and apologized and asked if we can work it out !! She’s accountable but I seen what I did wrong myself including alcohol abuse where she said that wasn’t the issue it was her fault she should have gone a different path.. That’s after the fact o was in no contact and left the house for about 2 months.. I’m back it is completely hard but I gave up alcohol, and other stuff that came w it .. We do more traveling and have more things to do .. Alcohol ruined me during infidelity so I did a 360 and joined a gym. it’s difficult we have our moments we’re we argue but look for a solution now .. If anyone decides to stay it’s Hard but it takes two and it can be done and will make you stronger

[@pokeybear3904]

How's is your relationship doing now?

[@__dziendobry_7426]

Im trying my best to forget and work on myself, on the reasons why my boyfriend had a need to cheat and he explained it to me in details. He and I both know it cames deeply from his own trauma, and past and the hard time he and us were going through, but it is so horrible to live with. It is insanely hard and already happened twice, when it was promised before that it wont happen again. Is it foolish of me to give this relationship an another chance, knowing we connect really deeply all the time or should I just be strong enough to put an ending to both of our sufferring?

[@our.secret1130]

Stay with him as long as you can forgive him again when he repeats his behaviors in the future:)

[@fernandadeonna]

I love dr. glens laugh 🤣

[@12weekrelationships]

Me too, haha

[@touhamoumi6512]

He cheated and lie about it for 6 months and also lied to other person. His reason was he can get women with a way more less the effort he was putting in our relationship . We were together for 3 years engaged for 1.5 years.

[@khoakdoan]

30:00

[@rikij05]

This made me feel so good 😢

[@williamdacosta9026]

NO SORRY YOU CAN'T

[@flor1662]

I was dating a guy, 1 month in I decide to have a FWB bc I had personal baggage & didn’t want to work through it so I solved it with a bad decision, guy I’m dating finds out in month 3, gets upset & asks if it’s worth it to stay. I say yes bc I truly love being with him. I also think I used my FWB as a distraction of my feelings for the guy I’m dating bc I was really falling for him. We are now entering month 5 of dating & ever since him finding out, I’ve cut all ties, blocked FWB, changed my number & have been trying hard to win back my guy’s trust. Any advice?

[@IAmJeka]

How is it going? I'm a female that got cheated on by my female fiancé. She cheated on me with a guy. super blind sided. She swears she has no idea why she allowed it to happen and pretty much has acted the way you have. We're taking a break right now cause I need some space to get over it cause I've become so jealous and obsessing over the cheating. I've never been like that. My main advice would be patience, understanding, WORK ON YOUR SELF, becoming a better version of you and to check in on his feelings occasionally. Like for me the night she cheated she had gone to the movies with this guy that was supposed to be only a good friend of her. I was out of town and she was feeling sad that weekend so I was like "yea go to the movies with him its ok" they went back to our house to smoke which I knew and then they slept together. As soon as I got back I suspected it and look through her phone WHICH I NEVER DID and found messages from him mainly telling her he had wanted that so bad etc.... so now certain things trigger me like when we go to the movies (i obsess about is this the theater they went to? did he try to cuddle with her? did she allow it and still allowed hin to come home?". The area of the house they were in were it happened is a huge trigger for me. We are waiting for our lease to end cause I want to move. So just know you have to be willing to PUT A LOT OF WORK into it. To allow him to feel. To also communicate when you need to feel. To heal yourself. To allow him to heal. To provide information without him needing to ask (as long as neither of you are acting toxic) in my case they work together and she's been trying her best not to have similar shifts but she is a manager so he texted her the other day about work and she didnt tell me and i shouldnt have but grabbed her phone for some reason that day and saw the text... I just wish she would have told me... anyway this happened in June so I asked for some space to heal for a bit but I DO NOT want to break up.. I do want to work on it

[@synx7874]

I wouldnt touch you with a 20 ft pole if you cheated in me. Its over. Ur guy that is dating u is a full simp

[@MarkSummers-g2n]

Too late

[@our.secret1130]

@@IAmJeka that’s insane! Are you poly? Damn idk if I could get over that!

[@IAmJeka]

@@our.secret1130 no not at all. Not poly. As monogamous as it gets. We’re doing way better now. Really working on everything. Lots of therapy. A lot of open conversations. But who knows what the future holds.

[@harunkhan9307]

good idea

[@12weekrelationships]

Thank you! Which part are you referring to?

[@zineb2610200]

@@12weekrelationshipsI just discovered this channel and it is amazing. I have been listening to many podcasts but this channel is really different from the others. The jokes from time to time during the discussion makes it so authentic and funny. I hope we will be able to get more content from you guys

[@motswadiwamonna3880]

In my opinion if there was cheating it will happen again,people don’t change only the environment changes then we think it people.....good way is to end the relationship without fights thanks.

[@manuelmezaR34]

The recovery of a broken relationship is much higher if a man cheats than a women cuz the female has a emotional investment.

[@snailart14]

Men can emotionally cheat too though, and typically emotional cheating hurts the woman more because we tend to value emotions more. Not always but if it's just a one off fling while drink vs. months of emotionally cheating it's pretty bad

[@albertodeulofeu5277]

@@snailart14the exception doesn’t make the rule. Men cheat. Women betray. Men cheat to cheat. Women cheat to leave. Men don’t leave.

[@isoroelevield7138]

Can you do a talk about betrayal, but not just about cheating. Betrayal in general. For example, a husband saying bad things about his wife to another person, or a wife going against her husband when it comes to major decision making (having children, buying a house, etc.), Or a husband coming out as gay. Stuff that's also betrayal, but not infidelity.

[@johnphamlore8073]

There is a high percentage of those choosing to stay that their religion or culture advocates they have no choice but to stay? Or if they leave, there are eternal consequences.

[@toadman5184]

Can you glue a shattered car windshield back together? And would you want it back if you could? There's your answer.

[@bobbygrice140]

Annoying these kid acting!