How to QUICKLY Get Over a Breakup - TWR Podcast #67

[@SanDzFit]

My wife walked out after 6 years. I immediately ghosted her, deleted a thousand photos, and deleted her number from my phone so I’m not even tempted to reach out. It’s the only way. If they didn’t appreciate your presence they won’t miss your loss.

[@invisible8481]

Thank you for this man! Same to you, he also just walked away. Fuck, it hurts 😢

[@katharden5806]

Wow 6 years! I'm proud of you. I just deleted all pics myself from a much shorter relationship and it felt so good.

[@AAA-sx5ej]

Same hear

[@Oldrockrules]

Married 30+ years, two grown children and she walked out the door. Now divorced and I’m feeling pretty good about it considering all things. It’s hard because we’ve been together since 1988 when she was 16 and I was 20. We married when she was 21 and I was 26. We’ve traveled the world together and I have thousands of photos of our times together that I can’t delete because it’s literally photos of most of my life and watching my kids grow up. But I choose not to look at them and I won’t watch the home movies for a while. But even though it’s so surreal to find out you didn’t know them at all you better believe it when someone shows you who they really are. I know my worth and i won’t let what she feels change that. I’m valuable and it’s her loss. When someone walks away, LET THRM GO!

[@idamene4890]

Shouldn't an explanation be given as of why he is breaking up? Or should the person who is being left just move on without an explanation?

[@MohasininaBintekamal]

Day 1 for me. Please pray for me so that I can overcome this breakup respectfully.

[@brooklynelsie34]

sending my love. ❤

[@nikkicole4909]

How are u doing

[@MohasininaBintekamal]

@@nikkicole4909 It’s been a little over 3 weeks and I am doing a lot better! Actually I am surprised myself how am I doing so much better after being dumped. I am working on myself, started doing meditation, consistent therapy and a lot of KZbin therapy haha. First 2 weeks were worst, but slowly it’s getting better. I have come to reflect my relationship with my ex and got to realize how incompatible we were for each other!

[@MohasininaBintekamal]

@@nikkicole4909 Honestly, I am doing way better than I would have thought. First 2 weeks were brutal, but now after 3 weeks it's becoming easier. I feel no urge at all to contact my ex. I am fully working on myself, started meditation, and healing in a positive way. Now that I can reflect back to my past relationship, I can see how incompatible we were. Even though I was the one who got dumped, I am feeling like it happened for the best.

[@MohasininaBintekamal]

It’s been a month. I am doing better overall. I am grieving the loss. Giving the love that I had for him to myself ❤

[@denilsonkariuki]

Its been 2 months, im feeling better. I tried to reconcile but it never worked!. I deleted her contact and avoid any stalking. Time will heal me wish all you guys a quick recovery.

[@veroh55]

Same here,I'm on my day 3,starting today my 30days..hopefully to heal soon😊

[@aldionvanhouten3480]

Man, it's been about a month for me. It is so hard to let her go because she was there when my father passed away and then a month after that she broke up with me. I know I wasn't perfect in that relationship, but I tried. There was some things I did that was not good, but I tried my best to make her as comfortable as possible. I tried to reconcile because I was having such major separation anxiety with two of my most important people in my life leaving. But every time I reach out to her it just ends up getting worse and making each other sad because neither of us wants to blame each other for ruining the relationship. I feel like it's my fault for ruining things with always trying to push the boundaries with her, and she thinks she ruined a good relationship because she was not ready for a relationship. Neither of us want to blame one another. Then the last time I talked to her she got mad and I'm pretty sure she hates me now because of what I said that was probably needed some further explanation. But I think that trying to explain myself is only gonna make it even worse because I don't think neither of us understand each other's view point. It's so hard, and I don't want to leave things in a bad note, but I think that if I contact her one more time the damage will be even greater, so I'm just gonna leave it there. I think it's better that she views me as the bad guy instead of having her blaming herself.

[@NguyenNguyen-oq4rx]

@@veroh55how are you feeling now? Knowing that you may never see she/he again in your life?

[@veroh55]

@@NguyenNguyen-oq4rx I healed and already in another relationship

[@beenagairola8745]

How are you doing?

[@roelienvanzyl534]

The rejection part is the worse...It distroys our self-esteem on such a huge level!

[@609STAACKS]

Faaax I been with this girl for 9 years she came back but I wasn't ready the. When I was ready she was dealing with somebody and they vibes was not the same

[@609STAACKS]

I think that's what bothered me the most realizing she no longer wants me in the way she use to and the fact that she is looking at somebody else in the way she use to look at me

[@michelleamaya8540]

😢yes going through this it hurts so bad

[@michaelhill2933]

You gotta build your worth from the inside and it won't hurt as bad. Don't ever lower your worth off of someone else's rejection. I know it's hard but keep trying. U only let em hurt your self esteem if you need them. Don't ever need someone, want them in your life, but know you'll be ok if it doesn't work out

[@jahrooof]

Yes. I’m going through this same thing.

[@KimK_AllDay]

The break-up was so disrespectful, childish, and crazy. After the argument, I blocked him, and now, a week later, he's either blocked me or is ignoring my message. We've been together for about 13 years and have more good times than bad. I really do feel it's time to move on. My emotional needs are not met while he's constantly asking for sex and acts like a maniac whenever he thinks I'm holding back. But he struggles to buy me flowers or cards and is infamous for saying what he's going to do and never delivers. I'll be glad when I'm over this non-reciprocal situationship😢😭

[@NiaChua-x5r]

Same

[@hiraknath6559]

My relationship for 14 years is also now on the verge of ending.. I am really depressed. But seeing your comment, makes me feel I am not alone. How are you now, friend?

[@maryconte7140]

​@@NiaChua-x5rSame here, 4 years, he ended it over the phone and sent my things to me via UPS. Very cold and immature.

[@Xxx-vx1pi]

same. u deserve sooo much better. actions over words

[@invisible8481]

Samee😢😢 Praying for our healing gurl😢

[@mercyonuigbo9828]

I’m hurting and this really helped me Thank you Starting my 30 days “ why are you chasing someone that doesn’t want you”

[@12weekrelationships]

100%. Thank you for being here!

[@ZhivkoKabaivanov]

In my case that person wanted to be with me but I was too stubborn. Which resulted to the breakup.

[@CJwavie]

Man……😢exactly

[@jessieshey7950]

It’s been since June for me I swear I died and came back that’s how bad the heartbreak was and we’ll it’s better now the Lord has been my guide. I got ghosted and gave soooo much 💔💔💔💔💔

[@calamitycarl]

i get this point. But I can't move on, because she did want me, just something went wrong. Yes, now she doesn;t want me, but she did really like me, before i messed up, and thats why i can't forgive myself

[@sabrinaliu66]

i was doing all the wrong things the first week, then calmed down and realised how stupid i was, i am not going to give him the power to make myself miserable, he doesn't deserve my love and energy anymore.

[@SpyOnDeck]

We've all been there. How are you doing 8 months later?

[@suvamkc6906]

@@SpyOnDeck whatup to you bro

[@matthewstanley893]

20 years. We’ve been married for 15 years, but together for 20. We have a 16-year-old daughter, 12-year-old son. We had our daughter when we were both 21 years old. My wife asked for a divorce, four months ago . I feel like I’m on a different planet. Having kids so young, my eyes are only just now starting to open to the realization that I have no idea who I am. My identity since I was 21, and I turn 39 this Saturday, has been that of a father, and a husband. The whole concept of work on yourself is alien to me , and only now realizing that I have never done that in 20 years. Trying to stay hopeful that each day will provide a little more clarity.

[@SpyOnDeck]

Hope things have gotten better for you, since 🙏

[@balkee42]

Im in same boat. Im 43. My gf of 14 years ended things last week. I dunno what the heck to do with myself

[@meganoreilly895]

Wish you well!! ❤

[@matthewstanley893]

@@balkee42 one minute, one day at a time brother. Work 13 hours a day like me! The more I can distract myself mind the better. Here for ya if you need to talk.

[@danica6884]

I know the feeling and it sucks. My husband and I have been together almost 25years total and we split a couple months ago. I totally lost myself with that man

[@IamchildofGOD-1625]

Today is my day 2 it’s hard I miss him … 😢but I know time will heal me …. Pray for everyone for recovery fast

[@aminaali8086]

Hope you Okay,3months later.

[@mymysticalsoulsjourneytaro9930]

How are you know? It’s been 5 months since your post. Are you better?

[@keenannelson-barer307]

Hope your okay five months later

[@haninotakichi]

8 days

[@Dave_Jee]

2 days

[@nicolameikle8737]

This video has broken my heart 💔 It’s opened up my awareness of the addiction I have to my ex which is causing awful behaviours to feed my ‘childhood wounds of abandonment & rejection’

[@ThisIsIt42768]

this man exactly going through

[@BMILBOCKER10]

Me too 😢

[@eyaalem7990]

Same here. It’s a good opportunity to just dig ourselves. This is a getaway to creativity. It’s raw creativity.

[@wizzler613]

Same 😢

[@alenaadamkova5322]

People shpould go every weekend to nature, camping, or hiking or to some cottage...absorb the nature, make food outside enjoy the fresh air... Nature increases your mood buta lso the immune system of body by 30-40 percent. do it regularly, then notice how it affects the relationships. Also the kids need the nature a lot.

[@pomup107]

I listen to this vid trying to sleep every night. You guys cannot imagine how much you have helped me in this period. Thank you so so much!!!

[@BlackMan-rw6jf]

How did u overcome

[@victoriordaah6560]

Hope you’re in a better place now

[@aneriataylor7091]

Found this today and it's plugged in now

[@57_jcm22]

Same!!

[@palapalak.8907]

I have gotten a new pet after a break up with a Narc. Best thing ever! I totally think about my pet, her health and love her. Unconditional love with animals. She waits in the window for me. I saved her from an animal hoarder but in turn, she has saved me!

[@bissyloo]

i let someone i trusted convice me i let someone i loved use me it caused me to feel worthless under-valued embarrassed ashamed than eventually ghosted i was there when he needed help i was there when he needed comfort i was there when he needed to end it so many times but i kept resisting it i was there living in a fantasy relationship thinking he was my one but itʻs all getting clearer now we were not meant to be together i can finally forgive myself i can finally let go i can finally move on i can finally b someone better …

[@lynnewint3112]

I'm sure you can, you don't need someone who doesn't see your value cuz I'm pretty sure someone would be thankful to have you around. It's his lost and not yours so better cheer up. Someone made me an option as well without me knowing about it so I'm like if that's the case let those people have you cuz I can have someone who would see me and love me the same way I do or maybe more

[@LydiaKim-e9o]

Sounds just like what I went through.

[@Divalevel]

8 year fantasy relationship for me. He just up and ended 5 days ago bc he found a new interest. When I read ur comment it was like u were writing about my experience. The only thing is I haven't forgiven myself yet. I think that is the hardest part. I was a good, faithful, loyal woman to him something I thought men wanted. I will still be those things bc that's who I am. I guess like u said we were just not meant to be. I'm hurting so so bad. I feel totally betrayed. I hope I make it through. Tfs

[@matthewstanley893]

Thank you for sharing, I hope that things are still looking up for you. I see it’s been a couple months since you posted this. Your words are eerily, familiar, replace he with she. I’m four months into my wife, asking for a divorce after 20 years. The embarrassment is so heavy. I also feel ashamed of myself for being so blind and naïve for so long but more than anything it’s the embarrassment that I was genuinely pouring love into someone and something that was never actually there. Its caused me to isolate from friends and family. I’m ashamed to talk about my marriage, because when I do, it becomes painfully clear that I just accepted a long time ago an incredibly low self-worth and convinced myself that I was only good enough to be treated so shitty. No self-respect. Sorry for the long reply, I have a hard time talking to anyone, and this is kind of therapeutic. Again, I hope you’re doing better. ❤

[@bad.chickie66]

Same shit. Feel betrayed and used all the time.

[@davidforrest5982]

5 yrs of marriage and she left a month and a half ago. Time to focus on my self now more than ever. I’ll never break. I love you all.

[@frances.adelle]

Did she say why?

[@invisible8481]

same man😢

[@delightgutip1610]

you'll be fine.

[@catheyblessed4461]

@@davidforrest5982 you will be just fine. I am sure u are in a much better place.

[@aaajjjmmm1863]

You got this bro

[@SRangerMtl]

About point number 4: After too many dissatisfying flings and dates and a couple heartbreaks, I started running, and man I ran a sub-3h40 marathon and I'm 44, my confidence is better than ever before, I'm having better quality dates, I set myself goals for the fun of it (qualify for Boston is now one of them), and the best part is I am now part of a community of active and healthy people... with a lot of single beautiful women!

[@risefromyourpain]

Well done mate.

[@Letsgetit138]

This is by far the best video I’ve seen over getting over a break up on KZbin. This one really moved me

[@lilioshka]

These two gentlemen have such soothing voices, it was a pleasure to hear them.

[@AntwhaleNearfar]

Unintentional ASMR.

[@Oscar_239]

Yes puts my mind at ease

[@Ponnybit]

nice eq ;)

[@DavidFelix-zo1gr]

Very well

[@KimK_AllDay]

Yessss... very calming, too. I'm glad I found this channel.

[@melodydonovan7884]

I am 70 and after 25 years of selfish bad behaviors, no intimacy, no respect I said enough. It’s been difficult because it’s years of loss of identity and being part of a two. I was elated at the freedom and I still will never go back to that, I don’t want to be a slave to any man again. The loneliness though can get to me, it’s difficult to go to places alone and not that safe at night or long trips. I made my choice though so I went back to working with young reps and I am determined to live on and move forward

[@missfitphamous]

I did the 75 day challenge to break free because its very addictive when you have been talking to someone every day for years

[@nataliew7372]

Did you stay strong?

[@joannamaybe]

I feel you.. rejection from my favorite person

[@jeffzwally]

What's the 75 day challenge?

[@PhantomBeef]

@@jeffzwallylook up Andy Frisella 75Hard program

[@trapped-ion]

It took me going through a near death experience with severe illness in the hospital to think about what's important in my life and how the betrayal I experienced meant nothing in the grand scheme of things. I could not even take calls from my ex and didn't feel anything - whereas before that it would've given me false hope about being together again. This transformation seems to have happened to all my relationships. The realization that ultimately, I shouldn't give my time and attention to those who reject or don't want to be with me. The experience forever changed me.

[@dgutierrez104]

Day #2 in my breakup. Its hard. The worst part is the sleepless nights

[@Inthistogethernow]

Agreed…and going to work in a daze…

[@Debby142]

It's painful 😢, I understand.

[@user-tq9to8oi2y]

You ain’t lying I’m going over a week 10 year relationship

[@balkee42]

@@user-tq9to8oi2y14 years here. We broke up a week ago.

[@Piasy-y8c]

Sleepless nights😭

[@jordanwatson9114]

Never thought I’d ever have to watch anything like this, I felt stupid even typing it into the search bar. I’m so glad I did though because after the first 25 minutes of watching has helped me so much, it really helped me feel not so broken. Youse are saving people from themselves and I thank you both very much.

[@thiago-kaz]

Man, this conversation just did me F*ing GREAT good! Wow! Everything just transformed inside of me and every time I get confused I'll come back here, even though I don't think it'll be necessary! Thank you!

[@testebiiidama4129]

Breakups have the opposite effect on me, I don't eat nonstop. I practically gain automatic anorexia. I can't eat and the little I can eat makes me feel like throwing up. It would be good to have more tips for those who can't maintain zero contact, because work in the same place, have children, etc.

[@WatchSniper]

she broke up yesterday and i just cant eat i have the same problem as u

[@intika8015]

I understand same happen to me this time I had last 5 kg food didn’t had taste and I want it to throw it out, now I’m at list eating . And sometimes food tastes really good !!! Keep going watch a lot of videos, does help :)

[@WatchSniper]

@@intika8015 im afraid of bingin, but when im thinking of the memories we had my hunger goes away

[@sandcrushlove]

I'm in so much pain I can't eat at all. Just lost my appetite completely but trying to drink coffee (with milk) and eat cheese. It's all I can bring my self to eat and drink right now just to have something in my stomach so it's not swirling with acid.

[@vanessagarcia5043]

I been through 4 hurtful break ups in my life. Im actually going through a breakup right now that ended 2 days ago. Just know you will hurt through this time. It’s okay to hurt & and cry. It’s okay to not be able to eat. It’s okay to not be okay. You need to go through the process of being heart broken. It’s a process! One minute you will be fine, the next minute you will be in tears. You’re still in the addictive state & it’s hard. But keep working on yourself. This is my third time watching this video & it keeps making sense each time I watch it. Keep working yourself. Trust me. Keep putting yourself first & revisit this video in a couple of weeks or maybe even months, and it it will make sense

[@chanelwewegesa]

The rejection and ghosting are the worst things to process. 😢 But this made me realize that getting closure will never work. Thank you for this. 💔

[@jahrooof]

Yes, I’m going through the same thing. It hurts.

[@JeffersonRah]

Yup same here

[@Ab1994ab]

My sons mom and I used to bond so well even though we’ve been broken up we’ve been working on ourselves for a future with each other. And she just told me she found somebody. I feel so fuckin betrayed. I’m hurt. Idk what to do to get better , I go to sleep hoping I wake up better and first thing on my mind when I wake up is that ..

[@chueyavila1402]

“Take care of your self, make a priority and make it a lifestyle” also once you start digging good habits there’s always more to adapt..

[@anabalraj410]

So true - 'why chase somebody who doesn't want you?' Too many of us try to hold on to that thing that we know and too afraid to leave it alone, even though we know it's not good for us anymore... Thanks for sharing this video...

[@stillying]

Thanks, this is really helpful. I am coping with a breakup now. Even I know it’s the right thing to do, I know I want to leave, but I am still in pain and want to get a closure from the other person. I have listened to some other podcasts, I am glad you guys are talking about dealing with it like dealing with addiction. That’s exactly what I was feeling. I was addicted to that person. Even I knew the relationship wasn’t great anymore. I was still hanging on there because it’s more painful to cut the addiction.

[@SocialwithRocki]

Can I just say I just got ghosted after 2 years and was devastated until listening to you guys. The humor alone has cheered me up … these are great steps thank you

[@SocialwithRocki]

30:36 😂😂😂😂

[@gingerqueen820]

How are you feeling now? Hope you are ok friend.

[@SocialwithRocki]

@@gingerqueen820 we are back together and doing amazing 🤩 I put my foot down and realized that I was part of the problem, ghosting was his reaction to avoid conflict

[@KATKATT-on3gk]

Ghosted after 16 yrs. Ugh

[@SocialwithRocki]

@@KATKATT-on3gk wow I’m so sorry about that

[@yesitsme8702]

These steps and phases are so accurate because I went through them exactly as stated a month ago

[@danettecook2709]

I love how calming both of your voices are. This really helps when people are hurting. Thank you.

[@anaveljkovic6181]

❤

[@Lilo56555]

I think this episode was really eye opening for me personally because of what I am going through right now. Very good talk, I enjoyed every second of it, and I might even replay it in the future for sure. All the best.

[@Hotshotscott]

Agreed

[@ravdoss]

"Everything that was once good is now bad" 36:15 My ex described our relationship of 20 years this way after deciding for divorce. She said the "only good thing" from our time together was our son. It was impossible to even grasp and she repeated it to relatives and I assume her friends. For every good thing I could cite she'd say she could come up with two bad things. It felt as though she had to cast the entirety of our relationship as one giant hellscape in order to justify destroying it.

[@RichRobinson]

That’s rough. I’ve experienced a similar kind of scenario - suddenly branded as the bad guy who “can’t be trusted” just so she could justify getting me out of the picture and give her new relationship the best chance of survival. She knew I’d done absolutely nothing wrong. I think it’s the only way she felt she could handle the situation to move on with him. It didn’t have to go down like that. I felt betrayed and unfairly punished for someone else’s weakness. Their relationship was on and off. She tried to reach out during one of their breaks but I didn’t take the bait. He hung himself 2 years later. I guess it’s fair to say it didn’t work out for them. 😂

[@sloanmagnum5009]

She sounds like she was miserable the whole time. We only have your side of the story and shes not here to defend her position on the matter. If she went as far as to make sure you knew how unhappy she was then theres a reason from her perspective. Whether or not you were or were not the bad guy, she felt how she felt in the end. Where there not signs earlier in the relationship that hinted at her unhappiness? There had to have been.

[@testebiiidama4129]

I feel you, man. My ex husband started talking like that in the beginning when we broke up, and added that I disgraced his life, that he was an idiot for starting the relationship and insisting so much on it, etc. But now he's calmed down, good years have passed and he's still my best friend. Sometimes it's just the way he/she processes the pain, breakups are painful even for those who choose to break up. Lucky for me, as his wife I was already used to these outbursts of uncontrolled emotions and excessive anger over small things (in fact that was one of the reasons I thought it best to break up) I managed to deal reasonably well with all the hatred he distilled at first, since at least that was a good reason for him to react like that.

[@edt8535]

She did that reframing thing to make herself feel better and to justify her own actions in her mind. Period.

[@ravdoss]

@@sloanmagnum5009 Every relationship has its ups and downs, no? And yes, you only have "my side" of the story and even in that you've only but the briefest glimpse of what I chose to speak about in reference to this video. The question of signs is an odd one because as I said... every relationship has its ups and downs, did I think there was anything glaring or relationship destroying? No but here's the kicker ...she admitted on her blog to having lied to me, her family and friends how she felt about things FOR YEARS, so there's that. There were times where I had asked if things were all right between us only to be told that all was fine and asked why I thought otherwise, those were lies she chose to tell versus the truth that could've led to things being worked on. You can ask all the right questions but if your partner will look you dead in the eye and lie then put it back on you like it's all in your head... what do you do? Call them a liar? Once she decided to be done she was a torrential downpour of truths she'd been keeping all to herself.

[@eddiegooze]

The closure part was so true. I wanted closure with my ex after a month or so. I had a glimpse of hope because she was friendly to me a week before when I went to pickup my stuff from her house and we talked for 2 hours like we used to. When we met I was hopeful that she was gonna take me back and was gonna give me a chance when I was gonna say I will change and be the man she wanted but it just made everything so much worse. She told me all the problems that I had in our relationship, she told me she will never be with me again and that we can be friends and she cared about me but she didn't have any romantic feelings towards me anymore. Then after I kept trying to win her back and try to pursued her she told me she is talking to someone else already and that killed me. If I didn't go to talk to her none of that would have happened and her telling me all those things has made getting over the breakup 100000 times worse. It's been 2 months since we broke up and I have been in the same situation I was the day we broke up.

[@EduardoHernandez-se1iu]

I’m sorry to hear that brotha. Time heals all. Going through a similar situation

[@MessagesFromJames]

Going through something similar as well

[@Saul-mv7dm]

Going thru the same situation

[@raquizana]

4 yrs.. just ended up 2 days ago. It's Fu*king hurt man. The memories and everything that I did for her.. 😢

[@12weekrelationships]

Sorry to hear. Indeed, it's painful.

[@karolp7698]

Sending love!

[@kaoshi_kutie]

You will get the through it ❤️🤗 let yourself mourn the relationship it’s the only way to heal

[@rotondwamphagi7668]

Dear stranger , Am sorry to hear this . Its extremely difficult to deal with this but keep going it will get better with time

[@raquizana]

@@kaoshi_kutie thank you I feel better now, she's dating someone before we break up. I just accepted it as a man.

[@gglin5595]

You are right . Why do we chase someone who doesn't want us...

[@Aquaelle6]

4 years living together and have "broken up" countless times. This video gives me hope in my future self and it's exactly what I needed to hear!Thanks guys.

[@meganoreilly895]

When you share a kid you can’t completely forget them

[@cris-yo1950]

Thats what I fear the most. We were together for 1.5 years and have a baby daughter together. Maybe its different for me since I havent been with her for that long.

[@tonymew2064]

I’ve been there. Slowly over time it gets better. I share a kid with my ex and the focus has been on our kid. It’s weird but after the hurt went away friendship formed. The hardest part was what do you do when you don’t have your kid. I ended up falling in love with exercise. It was hard. I would go to the gym 2x a day because it was the cure to negative thoughts. I became addicted to it because I feared depression that much.

[@CatherineRojas-s4x]

​@@tonymew2064 it's really hard when you already have a kid 😢. It's hard to give up on the hopes of having a complete family and I'm afraid that my little ones might feel there's something that is missing in their childhood. It breaks my heart for my twins 💔. I hope to recover sooner.

[@AudioNumeric]

The key is Forgiveness…. Let Go

[@jimdahedl7948]

I have watched an infinite number of these types of videos, and can truthfully say, this was the most helpful!! Thanks guys!!

[@alexgolubski]

I know I’m basically addicted to him. He broke up with me yesterday. It the difference is I know why he wants to break up. It’s harder for me bc like it’s if you love them let them go. I need to clean myself up and grow from this but I’m like a plant without sunlight. That’s how I feel. His smile would light my world. I need to find a new light and it has to be MY happiness. This time around I have to be for me.

[@monicaitambu9176]

How do you feel now please ,

[@NakayiwaRose-o5b]

Sorry my bro focus on your life... have hope for ubundance

[@matts6595]

Of all the breakup videos on here, this one has been the most helpful and real by far. The role playing was triggering over how real it was to receive those sorts of responses not only in seeking closure, but any sort of outreach can potentially lead to that back and forth. The addiction aspect is so helpful in that it reframes the situation into more logical terms and not an emotional mess. This video is amazing. I hope you have more similar ones.

[@Eva22284]

This video helped me more than anything else has so far. Putting it in terms of an addiction and some of the things you both said and even the compassionate way you talked about it, really helps. Putting it in terms of getting a fix helped me see things clearer and I dont want to put myself through any more pain than I've already been dragged through. So thankful I came across this, thank you

[@barbarauptain]

I am going through a divorce from an 8 year marriage, this was so helpful as we have tried to get back together 2 times in the last 3 months we have been separated and it definitely has set me back on my healing journey, I am now back on track to healing... What I really liked about this video was the examples you gave, well done, Gentlemen! Thank you, keep up the good work!

[@Howtocaricature]

This is great advice for teenage and 20s dating. When you are married for 10 years. When they become part of your muscle memory. This is only a little helpful. Men getting dumped is a serious problem and after 1/2your money is gone, along with loss, it's a ptsd type problem. You cant just suck it up gentlemen. Once you get more seasoning in age you will understand.

[@joeyGunz1-w1r]

Keeping busy, getting your mind off it should help. But of course it hurts so much I understand what your saying.

[@cynthialaunica11]

The fact that I'm here tuning in to this podcast, which is very informative and helpful, is a step forward. Be strong for anyone who is hurting, love yourself, and stay positive through it all. There's a reason why we ended up where we are, and usually there's something better waiting at the end. 🙏🏽❤️

[@xdvriuss]

“You are your own closure” thank you.

[@abdulrahmanfathey2280]

It’s been a while and I’m looking for something to soothe my pain and this is the podcast that changed everything and helped me to go sleep, the way y’all talk and the quiet background is super dope

[@onceagaindc]

I just ended a 1 month old relationship. And reading all of your comments. Mans... i got lucky

[@roelienvanzyl534]

The break up is one thing, them moving on with someone else is on another level.

[@609STAACKS]

That's the stage I'm going threw now

[@jason2723]

Same

[@jahrooof]

Yeah, good for them. Shows the type of person he or she is.

[@Dfree4000]

So I'm not the only person that feels that. Worse part is the kid is too young too know bringing them up feels bad smh...

[@yaseengaffoor]

They were never yours, it was only your turn.

[@victoriaswift193]

This is one of the best podcasts I’ve ever heard. I needed this so much.

[@hollisterchik90]

This is awesome. Really loved the podcast. Going through a toxic breakup. Really happy to see things like this for help.

[@trevoraugustus2249]

Breaking the drug addiction is super tough with co-parenting of little kids. So much back and forth is necessary, it really adds a layer of will power needed.

[@user-ui5fi6rp9m]

You are absolutely right, but like you said, with co-parenting of kids, breaking the addiction will absolutely be necessary.

[@jeaninekane653]

Text him on WhatsApp for help 👆👆👆

[@JM-cp6ei]

Look into “parallel parenting” if u are still struggling with this. At first, it takes adjustment but I’ve seen parents become amicable within months of implementing after years of co-parenting breakup torment.

[@levijohnson4696]

Thank you for this, there where so many memories and so many good times that I’ll never forget. It hurts so much and I feel so defeated and empty.

[@fredkhan3657]

This was great , the last segment about just manufacturing hate / anger . 11 years of 90% great relationship forgotten over 10% not that bad :/ Thank you guys .

[@nofofakafeaot]

This really cleared up everything for me and I’m so glad I came across this, just by watching your video I feel so much better already. Thank you both very much.

[@Ob26786]

Amazing way to tackle this subject, thank you!!!

[@specialkdubs5800]

I've watched a lot of these videos in the past week. This was by far the most constructive. Thank you guys.

[@Armani_22]

She’s not coming back mindset is the best because if she does you already prepared for the worst!

[@xiamaem3526]

I’ve listened and watched this 5x now. The advices are very helpful!

[@JF-cd5hc]

This was a fantastic video. The advice on closure is SO TRUE. Very observant man here because all his answers to what you will hear when trying for closure are absolutely true and right on. Time to work on me. Get myself back together.

[@L8-APEX]

This helped put things in perspective for me. It still hurts, a lot. But at least now I see the light at the end of the tunnel. Thank you.

[@L8-APEX]

2 months later, I haven't spoken to her since the night we broke up. She got a new, MUCH older boyfriend (20yr gap) which also helped me because I now see her as desperate and pathetic. Finding that out also gave me a good laugh. I'm slowly getting back into the dating world and have began talking to a new girl. Cold turkey worked very well however she's still my first thought in the morning and last thought at night. I think that will change too as more time passes

[@kankercutie]

@@L8-APEXupdate?

[@L8-APEX]

@kankercutie The girl I was heartbroken from ended up marrying the old dude (most likely for financial security) after dating/knowing him for a little over 2 months 😂😂 I can see now that I was also being used and could care less about her now although I still miss her kids that I became very close with. Wasn't even allowed to tell them goodbye or explain the situation. I hope they know I didn't abandon them. The new girl I mentioned im no longer dating either. She was extremely selfish and two-faced. I'm back to being single now and am content. It's amazing what some time and perspective will do for pain. I am very lonely but at least I'm off the emotional rollercoaster. I dont think I'm cut out for what dating had become today. I wanted kids & a family but at age 34 the chance of that is dwindling each year. I guess not everyone meets their someone and I've come to terms with that now. The main thing I can say is give yourself time before you do anything drastic like I almost did. Things will get easier. You can be the perfect partner to someone and they'll still leave you. That's on them, not you.

[@kankercutie]

@@L8-APEX oh omg ...

[@matteoescana4338]

My gf break my heart after being together for 9 years. She woke up one day saying that she is not happy anymore. The only thing that will make the things better is time, time is the only medicine and eventually you’ll find someone who truly love you. We broke up 10 days ago and sometimes I’ve seen here in places and she looks happy and I just don’t understand how can she moved on just like that but that’s life. My suggestion is to carry on doing what you do, work, gym etc etc and time will make it better🙏

[@youllneverguesswho886]

@matteoescana4338 I’m sorry for what you’re going though. I feel your pain also, my 9 near relationship ended around 2 weeks ago and the heartache is horrible. But I’m not crying as much now and trying to focus on myself. I hope you’re able to do the same and we both find our happiness again one day 🤞🏼

[@trapped-ion]

They already had someone before announcing the breakup - that's why they're happy. Now you know the kind of person you gave your loyalty to.

[@alexisjones802]

It’s day two of my break up and I have to physically stop myself from texting him and telling him I missed him. The sleepless nights and not being able to eat is hard to. I started going back to the gym I’m going in the morning. I’m going to start the 30 days like you said I think it really going to help! Thank you this has helped me so much you don’t even know!

[@Gravityforce70]

Your role play of three scenarios towards end of episode rang true- 25 years this past August and she left similar to Scenario #1… Regretful I didn’t see this pod 9 months ago. Thank you for your honest work aimed at men.

[@jonasg1150]

This is a ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️settled breakdown. So clearly outlined on how to make a smooth transition while healing. I'm currently in the detox phase. Blocks, bounderies, and uninstall social accounts. Great🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@indigodp7]

We got this 🙏 .. wish you the best 🙏

[@MS-ns4ki]

When someone ruthlessly left me .. I never chased him nor anyone else . That’s why I snip snip.. bc I already know what this is all about.

[@mitchelcline9759]

Two days ago breakup, 9 years are finished. She breakup me. Terrible pain. I decide zero contact. Over 2 weeks now. 1 contact (her to me) via email, kept it just business, nothing since, talking to new girl, she's nice. Definitely go the no contact route. Be strong. Met the new girl randomly on hike with my daughter. Zero internet dating success despite trying.

[@SnapEtaco]

Same brother. 10 years. Then ghosted like I never mattered. The last contact was "I'm done. I can't take it anymore." It was my fault, but couples have had way worse fights. Way worse. She was younger than me. She'll find a guy quick. I've cutoff contact, 10 days and counting. Been working out hard. Still thinking of her everyday, some days more than others. Praying for a positive outcome. I know it will come but GOD DAMN, the waiting period is HELL. Stay strong brother. And everyone else reading this and hurting.

[@mitchelcline9759]

@@SnapEtaco Yesterday I talked to some guys at the gym and I never did before. Old me would've been chasing girls, new me is building friends. Trying to at least. It's helping. Also, a massive help is gratitude. When I'm hurting terribly and can't take my mind off her I start repeating over and over in my mind everything and everyone in my life that I'm grateful for. Over and over in my mind until I start being so filled up with gratitude that all the poison and pain in me gets squeezed out from not enough room. Don't try not to think about her it won't work. But focusing intensely on gratitude will fill you with so much good that it'll push out the other. It works for me.

[@mizeria777]

I really appreciate your podcast and your way of talking and voice levels on here because it’s really soothing and calming. A lot of people on KZbin doing this similar podcast have this kind of energy that I don’t even vibe with when I’m in the middle of Break up That really doesn’t feel empathic. Also, I wish I should’ve watched you guys the day of my break up because I’ve already sabotaged it by reaching out to him three times in the seven weeks of gap since the break up of me and my ex

[@Pays2bpretty]

Sending you hugs. Wish I too had seen this video earlier. I was rejected twice, this hit home " why are you chasing someone who doesnt want you" I am in therapy and working on myself.

[@kathleenblair7278]

I decided to break things off with a man that was looking for casual sex only. I am a recovering alcoholic and the break up made me want to drink. I am going to go forward regardless of how much it hurts. To drink would take me back drinking and being a piece of meat between the sheets.

[@palapalak.8907]

I can so relate. It's so painful.

[@edt8535]

Someone who wants casual sex only is only worried about himself and he does not respect you, at least not like he should. I’m a man and I have certainly wanted casual sex from women before…but I have stopped doing that. Trust me, if that’s what the guy is after, it won’t likely change. I’m sorry, but that’s the painful truth.

[@eringrey9297]

2 months later. How are you?

[@yaseengaffoor]

Are you ok?

[@alanmcalister4124]

There is no "Quick" getting over a relationship however there is smart ways to take your life back. I totally agree STAY AWAY! Take care of yourself. Stay busy and be of service. I am one of those people where food makes me sick during the withdrawal stage. I am two weeks in and lost 12lbs so far. I am on the thin side to begin. I know I have to a do a better job at staying healthy. It is not easy .... My best wishes are for anyone going through this heart ache. (There is no closure making yourself whole is the closure)

[@LATANYAL]

I appreciate the inspirational words

[@GionneS]

Im probably the first person in my circle of friends and peers to get divorced.. i feel like my life is over. I miss her so much. Im typing here as I just drove 6 from my home town to our now nearly empty former apartment together to pack the last of my stuff. I miss the memories and all the great things we had together here. She was a half toxic person but I knew the love bombing was just a disguise. Knowing she left me for someone else while gaslighting me on the actual reason for her leaving is so surreal. I hope this gets better. I guess im still 33 and have time still.. love you all

[@keriflynn]

I’m 2 days into my breakup with my boyfriend of 8 years. I lost trust in him, and even though I was willing to work on it, he couldn’t give me time, so left. 😢 This was comforting. Thank you ☺️

[@nakiapenningotn6165]

I really need this information. You guys help me understand few things I was struggling with. I followed the channel

[@wanguiteresia2508]

Close family members warned me about this person but I still never gave up on him but only for him to suddenly change and tell me they no longer want me… I’m hurt but I’m processing this cause this is the 3rd time he says this Iv come into terms. I’m hurt but looking forward to get over this and focus on my with my life

[@Travel-withnjugunas1624.]

I am going through a hard time from a break up i am grateful to hear from you guys

[@leonkrahn9593]

This was probably the most helpful video I've ever found on this. No promotion of toxic, "alpha-male" stuff, no "how do you make your ex jealous", just great advice on how to deal with things emotionally, without any judgement of who might be in the wrong or not. Really, really loved and and helps me get through my current breakup. She broke up with me 3 days ago and it's been 1 days of no contact. It's rough, but I'll manage to reach the 30 days, I'll try my absolute best

[@jaybee5794]

I'm going after someone that doesn't value me, to prove to him that I'm of value... Ugh

[@majoritypatella2503]

Stop. That sounds terrible.

[@raemornverak6616]

me too😅 how stupid

[@csolo3057]

This opened my mind up so much and I felt like you guys were calling me out on my s**t. Literally had me put everything in perspective and show me the error of my ways in my relationships. Especially the part on closure. Thanks guys

[@kathywhitner2049]

Thanks you guys ❤ I just ended a three yr relationship. I knew in my 💜 he wasn't the "one" as much as I wanted him to be. Hes a great person and brought a lot to the table. He was everything I wanted but the one thing I needed... I came to the realization and we ended it. It's still fresh and I saw him today briefly and it set me back again. Just wishing I had a cold ❤ and no feelings or emotions! Ugh But thanks for your candid and mildly entertaining pod cast... I just have more work to do on myself ❤

[@scarletsletter4466]

Same. Almost exactly.

[@margaretsprague9465]

Going through it...haven't done it yet...sadly still hanging on😢

[@gillounet4766]

3 years to realize he wasn't enough for you ? Wow.

[@MATILDOLL]

On the same boat, 3 years he ended via phone call. It hurts but we will heal eventually.

[@samia6888]

It took 3 years??

[@ddog4171]

Got dumped a few days ago and the best thing i couldv done was the minute the call was over, i deleted all traces of her on everything and told her that if she cares for me at all then please dont contact me.even took all social media apps off my phone and blocked before hand.she said how cold it was and how quick i did it and i just said the minute i hear its done...thats all i need to know.and i tell you im so glad i did because if i hadnt then id of reached out already and wouldv regretted it.these kinds of things are a battle for your sanity and your peace of mind so fight it with everything you have.

[@slin1199]

I love the closure examples. It gives me a better idea of what could happened and really stopped me reaching out to him

[@prinascimento2151]

This was one of the greatest videos I watched on KZbin. You guys are very insightful, practical, directing and funny at the same time. Thank you so much! ❤️

[@robsherar3159]

Best video on this particular topic I have ever seen (and I've seen a lot). Game changer guys, well done 👍🏼

[@idamene4890]

0:00 0:00 0:00

[@idamene4890]

0:00

[@augustaalecsa9680]

Hugs from far away to anybody who hurts. I am in my second day. I know I said "no" to worse. I refuse to starve for love, I refuse to settle for less. I am not built to be abandoned, I am not buit to not trust for tomorrow, I am not built for things like "breakup". I am built for love and being loved. I am not here for weak relationships that can break ... I said "no" to pain also. That's not love. That's disease. I am ill. So, I will offer myself treatment and care and know-how. Thanks for the 30 days advice. Me and my ex will stay friends, but not now. Now it's time for self love. Now it's time to offer myself what I offered him or I wanted to offer him. Then see what's wrong with my offer and learn.

[@JM-cp6ei]

Wow, this episode was so helpful and well done. It makes so much sense. Some of these concepts I’ve never heard before, but when u treat it like an addiction, what it really is similar to, it allows u to think of it from a 3rd party perspective which is really challenging to do when ur in the thick of it. great strategy in keeping with the willpower to find what everyone deserves: a healthier relationship with yourself And eventually a healthy partner.

[@oliviaduarte7056]

Ty for the podcast. It was extremely helpful. Started my 30 days yesterday.

[@RichardNepia-z1y]

How is it going

[@MATILDOLL]

My second week a lot better :)

[@michellecastro1696]

how are you? im on my day 2. feels like my heart is literally broken

[@nserasera]

Did you reach out in the beginning? I did contact after 10 days and now I feel like I messed up. But I just started it again and will continue. I guess relapse is apart of recovery but I’m committed and feel stronger like I can, partially bc reaching out didn’t change much…

[@nafeesahtynetta]

Day 1, looking forward to day 30. I know some amazing insights and clarity will come from this.

[@anthonyvargasjr1602]

Wow I really needed this video after a year of going back and forth every two weeks the walking on eggshells and her bipolar Behavior, i cant dobit anymore! I never thought I'd have to block someone but for my sanity im blocking her crazy ass. Day 1 the healing starts now. Great video ty!

[@bleu7468]

I am so thankful I stumbled onto this, going through the mourning phase still and everything that was mentioned on this episode really resonated. I need to work on being dialectical, this is whats making me hold onto this toxicity.

[@pattylopez6753]

I love the part you spoke about not needing the other person to get closure! I was hanging onto that but now I realize I don't need to see him to move on

[@humblecoolkid5707]

its realy helpful. i had an heartbreak and i just needed to listen to this

[@kanamugirealainthierry4779]

"This was very helpful. Now I know the next steps to take, even though I understand it will be difficult for my kids. What we're going through is toxic for both the kids and both of us. Thank you."

[@yahnazoe3618]

This podcast was incredibly helpful during a very difficult breakup. 30 day detox program is going to make this healing time different and more healthy then any other. Thank you.

[@yahnazoe3618]

And the thing about if there is something there now it will still be there in 30 days because we are trying to be friends like we were before. But the 30 day thing takes the pressure off and allows me to grieve the loss of lover..

[@isaacwilliams7217]

how is it going now?

[@scarletsletter4466]

Don’t try to be friends, unless you were close friends for many years before you dated, or it wasn’t a longterm serious relationship. It’s just not usually worthwhile to be friends with exes

[@kankercutie]

@@yahnazoe3618update

[@NadiaFranke]

Thanks for the informal -way talk and at the same time honest, efficient, objective and very helpful !! Hugs from Brazil

[@walterayala7590]

Thank God I found this I needed this so badly

[@Haise8]

Thank you so much This was GREAT and timely as I'm going through a break up. Thank you again

[@bettyyairo2073]

It’s not easy to put away all the things that remind you of him cause my son is a copy of his dad. I enjoyed watching this, thanks 🙏

[@MohammadMoradi-f1q]

I found the video quite interesting and practical. Thank you both.

[@lozmarks]

I'm currently in my 3rd week now after an 8 year relationship. We weren't good before, but I'm still very much in the phase of missing the good times.. etc.. This video is very helpful and reaffirms the need to continue no contact for me (only 5 days currently). I'm trying to play the stubborn game now, as before I was reaching out most days.. "if she isn't messaging me, then why should I message her" is my new take on it now. I'm hoping closure will naturally come as a biproduct of the no contact. Thank you Pye and Dr. Glen.