13 Things Confident People DON'T Do

[@seancoopervids]

Here's the list of 13 things: 1. Compare themselves to others 2. Judge themselves 3. Dwell on the past 4. Waste Time Feeling Sorry for themselves 5. Passively Wait Life To Improve 6. Shy Away From Change 7. Avoid (Calculated) Risks 8. View Failure As The End Of The World 9. Live By Other People's Standards 10. Give Away Power 11. Try To Please Everyone 12. Avoid Rejection 13. Demand Perfection Of Themselves

[@gianfrancow2850]

+Sean Cooper how to cope with this? avoid comfort zones and "practice makes perfect" is enough?

[@SC-cq9ie]

Thanks a lot. you helped me alot

[@KRACKERJACK6913]

YEAH, I HEAR U, ME TOO. IT'S HARD NOT TO.

[@hinde64]

guilty of 1 2 3 8 12 13

[@friendlyfox2189]

i guess im already a confident person, im socially awkward but people love me for it XD

[@1slimmerlife]

Everyone is born confident. Confidence is everyone's default state. However, the home and community in which we grow up determine whether or not we hold onto that confidence. Trauma, punishment, shaming and other such experience can erode our confidence, make us fearful and anxious in the company of others. It also affects our attitude to life and our level of happiness and success in life.

[@B.CREAT1]

Wise words

[@slothape]

"Passively waiting for my life to improve" this one caused me to waste several years that I will never get back. I thought someone or something would just come along one day and get rid of my loneliness and anxiety.

[@timtim3666]

The Governor you should work on it, no one can help you except you, I think the first thing to do is love yourself and the second is confidence and positivity

[@CrowsCemetery]

slothape i got some tips for u 1.Don't drink any sugary drinks or sugary foods 2.Drink Natural Tea 3. Get enough sleep 8 hours at least 4.Take cold showers 5.Don't eat too much fast food 6.exercise If u want the easier way just stop worrying about everything and stop eating and drinking sugary things

[@kohbyagborg1595]

too many years tjat i wont get backkkkkk 🎶🎶🎶🎶🎶🎵🎵🎵

[@freedomwarrior5087]

Make small achievable goals and when completed, tell yourself "I'm awesome"! and repeat…

[@amatullahsafiya3132]

Yeah and I am still working on it, but I don't know how

[@Strangerer69]

14. Don't mentally escape by making up a scenario that the problem has already been resolved.

[@wcam7822]

omg... i do them all

[@1heartladybug]

Same

[@xxxxxxxd0rit0snoscop3rxxxx3]

same

[@whitewalker4932]

Oh hahahahh

[@anteros__]

A k a k o o m I unfortunately do as well...

[@tobiasbrunner4720]

I even do the ones that aren't on the list...

[@harmeetkalra7771]

Thanks Sean..I had a really severe social anxiety since my childhood. I have recovered a lot in the past one year since I have found your material and advice. One thing that essentially stuck was that how assumptions work in our real life. I really am thankful to you buddy for all this great work you have done and continue to do. Awesome Video and advice..Cheers Buddy (Y)

[@aw55550]

harmeet kalra never stop fighting SA its the worst psychosocial disease that we can suffer from

[@wcam7822]

+aw55550 it's horrible. it impacts every aspect of your life

[@MsThroneofgames]

Great video! I used to be like this because I struggled for years with a stammer in my school years and constantly comparing my self to others who I deemed to be more confident. I'm a lot better than I was before as after a few years I accepted who I am and focused on doing little things one step at a time to build up confidence. Im still not the most confident but I defiantly am I hellva lot better than I used to be and rather then dwell on old mistakes see them as lesson of which I can build myself upon.

[@Phking4]

U are amazing. Im Colombian and since I moved in the US I have had lack of confidence because of my accent, and you really helped me with this video. Thank u

[@arazemijo9674]

Being confident doesn't mean everybody likes you, it means that you like YOURSELF enough to not give a fuck.

[@andrewkrylov1501]

It is one of the best things to say about this topic.

[@peterhitchens3306]

Sean, I've watched several of your videos and they are superb. Keep it up, mate. Subbed.

[@riyaedwina9900]

You summed up my life in 13 short stories...Thanks man!! Love your work!!

[@greenicecube25]

Man, you're very good at giving advice.

[@maccastaneda1012]

It's so hard trying to find a video about confidence because when I'm at school I see all of the popular people who are confident and they are friends with everyone and are always having a conversation u really wish u could be like that and this video helped in multiple ways along with your video teaching you to overcome your social anxiety thankyou!

[@alexgehales]

Thanks Mr Cooper, I liked the 13 points, I am pretty confident but some of the tips you mentioned I do do. Time for self reflection.

[@jobaermolla911]

Hey I see you are inactive these years on the internet. I'm a fan of yours from Bangladesh and wanna meet you once in my life 😭

[@JV-tk9yn]

Holy crap I have all of these bad traits. I swear my confidence was higher in some ways at 22 than now five years later. I need serious help.

[@bladelazoe]

As someone who had practically no confidence growing up till the end of High School, Get a gym membership and start working out 2-3 days a week. Learn as you go, don't follow what worked for others, do what works for you and it's amazing on how much it helps your confidence which in turn helps other facets of your life.

[@JV-tk9yn]

Justin Powers Thanks I'm going to get to working out soon. It feels like it's my only option. Maybe it'll be something I'm good at.

[@bibana06]

Props. It does not resolve everything for someone who really lacks confidence like me, but it definitely improves your mood and personnal pride. It has learned me so many things about how to approach the events. The gym is the school of life. Period.

[@bibana06]

I used to have all of them as well. Even now, I still have got at least half. I'm improving, but it still sucks. The actual concern is about deciding to live for yourself, and not for the others. It might sound simple, but it involves huge responsibilities. I definitely feel your pain. I was also more confident when I was 17 than now, in my mid 20's.

[@JV-tk9yn]

bibana06 Yeah I think as you live life if you aren't going up you are falling down. Once you become an adult there aren't many new things to look forward to like when you're growing up. I guess I have to MAKE crap happen now.

[@eveggf]

I used to think that the reason to why people wouldn't talk to me was because i was fat and lazy. I suppose my anxiety helped In a way because I got really determined to get in shape. I now have a sixpack and I eat healthy and girls have started to stare at me and hit on me, but the anxiety still just won't let go! Every time I'm in a group of people i just go quiet and sit there. And when I finally do build up the courage to say something I just feel stupid after I've done it. These videos are really helping me though. Thank you so much!

[@006asyoulikeit.6]

If they don't like you, they could blame u anything they want. Even if you're handsome, it doesn't mean they'd like u.

[@garydowning4326]

Pretty damn good list. I wish I had this 40 years ago, it would have made my struggles a whole lot easier. I've had anxiety issues since I was a kid and had to figure this stuff out as I went along... No list and a lot of bad advise. I've got most of this list worked out now, but still struggle with 1 and 2. I might be a bit weak on a few of the others, but it's manageable now

[@aiydenaugsburger6467]

Thank you so much! I found your website which also lead me to this. I really feel like your advice will help me with my social anxiety. Ive been trying to get my parents to get me therapy or medication for years, but they blow it off. I really miss being able to do and say whatever i want without being terrified of getting judged.

[@loverainthunder]

Just watching this made me feel more confident!! lol lmao!!

[@sashawagner617]

im glad :)

[@SaraSara-mo4ik]

loverainthunder You may don't need this videos but other people need it and it's help them with them life so don't say thay dump or any shit like that ok mr, confident(:

[@DarklightALBANIA]

This was some really solid advice. Some was familiar some was new and some was put into words beautifully. For ex I knew that when going for a job interview you should act out like you are looking at other places and you are not sure yet if you will agree to working there if they want you....but I didn't know how to say that without sounding arrogant There is a fine line between arrogance and confidence. Usually in fear of sounding arrogant and walking that thin line I get way out of the line to the spot of trying to be NICE.

[@LuismsmC]

Just arrived at your channel. First I'd like to congratulate you for the essence of your content. It's kind, noble and very helpful. Very overlooked by our society but extremely important. Secondly, I would like to open a discussion about the first thing you mentioned "comparing to other people". It's not the first time I've heard it and your explanation makes sense, but I still can not get over it. Why? because we can not get a sense of who we are without the others. How would I know if I am tall, skinny, worthy of something, if there is no one to compare to? I think there must be some kind of comparison, but you need to be comfortable with what you have or achieve. I can be skinny or fat and not feel the need to change, even if I compare to others. That is the key. It's not the comparison, it's the need to change. So it appears to be terrible advice to say "stop comparing to others" because it doesn't address the root of the problem, only the result of it. So, the question is, what should people do to stop feeling the need to compare to others. An important note is that, it should be healthy to set goals and improve. So how do people deal with the period in witch they struggle to achieve them, and perhaps more important, if they are having troubles achieving them.

[@mikepawlikguitar]

Hey Sean, I enjoy your videos man you have a very calming and charismatic personality. I just wanted you to know that they are very helpful and that I am getting a lot of value from them. So, for that, thanks! ♥️

[@Britton_Thompson]

I have a funny story about one of these behaviors that's rather unique... I have always, and continue to struggle with social anxiety and feelings of being an alien amongst my own species; always feeling disconnected from the rest of humanity. I'm guilty of committing most of these "Don't do" behaviors mentioned in this video. However, I've just recently became proactive about it for the first time in my life, and I've begun taking the necessary steps to correct my issues through Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). But my version of issue #5, passively waiting for my life to change through external events, is quite unique compared to others. I didn't sit around wishing for the perfect girl to fall into my lap, or for the successful career to come find me. My version of passively wishing for my life to improve was of me suddenly reaching the point in my life where I would magically manifest the capabilities needed to become the confident, ambitious, determined, mentally strong person I'd need to be if I wanted to experience prosperity. I think my version is one that most socially anxious people don't have. In other words, I knew that I needed to possess more mental toughness if I was to ever lead a happy life, yet I never proactively pursued doing anything to cultivate that desired mentality until very recently. How's that for irony, huh? I wanted so badly to have a better mindset & personality, yet staying true to form, even that was something I passively waited to change also!

[@bibana06]

I sometimes act like this as well. I dream of being popular, attractive, less sensitive, and sometimes feed the hope that all of this is going to improve just by magic. CBT only works if you are dedicated, and have an deep, huge willpower. I'm not sure to be ready for this yet. Furtunately, my depression problems have quite improved.

[@alinebesoin]

you're awesome, man..

[@jeremy_s]

Really, really, good video. I can relate to so much of what you said, especially #2. Thanks for the video, it's all about improving ourselves as people :)

[@supasetleewairoj2440]

Yes...my parents really DO judge their children in their faces when they are anxious or make mistakes (weakness displeases them)

[@aaliyahkay9_]

I have tried this multiple times and it hasn’t worked because my anxiety goes on overdrive and takes over my thoughts

[@prometheus9443]

Work on a smaller scale then. Just don't stop working. The confidence "muscle" will grow, as song as you're exercising it. Whenever something's too difficult, just do less of it - but DO IT.

[@Novaximus]

Wow, this video actually has good substance. Unlike most the intro only lasted a minute before he started getting to the meat and potatoes. It's a state of mind but knowing the path is different then naturally walking it. If you're not naturally confident you have to mentally make it a point to regurrgiate everything he's talked about in this video constantly in your head every minute of every day which I think is counterintuitive to the point of this help because once again you are rethinking what you're doing with what you -should- do if you want to come off as confident. Maybe in time and with practice it becomes natural? I don't know.

[@moncomptesur]

The line is fine between some of these and the simple desire to be a better person. But great post :)

[@klejimr6965]

I remember 3 years ago i watched your videos i could relate, but now i dont find any relation ive Become another person not because of u, i comapred myself to others better than me i cultivated my anger towards myself and used that energy to become more self aware and hit the gym do work and it worked,Im better than most people ive encountered, Your solution is to raw hard physical labor real challenges not reading stupid books about why u are sad and unable to put 2 sentences together,i was there, I know, Being on your phone all the time does that. Do what you want with this information have a great life

[@beetlejuss]

Very cool video, what city in Colombia did you visit?

[@loverainthunder]

Okay yeah, these are good tips and you may find certain people who do focus on your slightest failure, clothing, etc. Please understand these are crazy evil people who have no real life, and you should not ever try to impress them. They are probably people who feed off of others pain because they hate themselves.

[@samkurz]

Sometimes we need to fight about our rights, instead of just sitting back doing nothing. I noticed so many people so passive about things and if everyone is like that then we will keep getting the same abuse.

[@elijahbrown7906]

Thank you so much! best video I've come across so far

[@j.f.9558]

Awesome videos! I really love it.Thanks so much.

[@vannnie222]

Great video.

[@baobaoear2399]

Thank you so much for sharing, they are so helpful :)

[@bycourtesy7028]

The advice for the job interview is perfect!

[@alexmungwaath2179]

Hey Sean, thank you for such a helpful video!

[@abhipab9494]

thanx man!! you are awesome really...i am to a shy guy and saw your article and registered my email id.I follow your videos regularly.I dont even have any one of the above 13 things.Once again thanx for the advice,i hope that i will take care of these tips in my life ;)

[@combatantezoteric2965]

Should I buy his audio-book ? Has anyone bought it and if so , it really changed something ?

[@drivenhome]

Excellent delivery.

[@holyender515]

i like you. im failing at so many of the things you mentioned. cant get over feeling sorry for myself. misery loves company..

[@andrewkrylov1501]

The 4th advice can be even damaging. People with serious depression shouldn't just ignore it and feeling so called sorry for themselves is important for healing.

[@andrewkrylov1501]

You need to search Compassion Focused Therapy.

[@amruthaxavier3170]

May God bless you friend for your helping mentality

[@michaelgreco1175]

Well, I'm happy I only have 2 of theses :) Thank you for your video, mate.

[@julieschofield4594]

Thank you Sean, awesome tips

[@ROCKNROLLFAN]

thank you man, that's really great information....

[@OMGVerified]

this is what i needed to hear, im going to practice all of them!

[@mohammadsharif8852]

Can any one tell me how much membership fee is for registration

[@jang90]

Really good video! All through the video i found myself saying ''yea'', ''ohhh really true'', ''interesting'', ''that's right''. You're interesting! Keep doing videos like that :)

[@adesinatemiloluwa308]

Thanks for this.Sean!!

[@davidbencat6216]

Hi me from the future, it's me from the past - unconfident, shy and uncapable I believe you are now highly confident, chilled and capable and you are looking at this and feel proud of yourself that you did it :)

[@mira8504]

Did that happen? Did you reach the goal you had made years ago

[@migueltn754]

the best video I've seen so far!

[@marotiem]

Great video! Thank you

[@georgiastarling8173]

Thank you this has some really great tips to help me!!! Xxxxxxx

[@emanuelzd9815]

Great video!! Very helpfull... Thank you! :)

[@jimmystevhan7954]

The Ultimate Life Guide on KZbin

[@TheSwedishHistorian]

Thanks for the video, I do all of these

[@TheSwedishHistorian]

But I'm trying

[@tabindaqureshi1957]

Thank you so much for your videos

[@xoundful]

Wish I could give you a 10 thumbs up man!

[@julieaugnac1590]

Thank you so much for your videos! =)

[@user-vc9or5uc4x]

Excellent advice

[@focusnails5994]

I do all of these ...

[@abigailfischer2578]

Really love this video!

[@jbdmb]

Can we hear you tell us about your South American trip?

[@djonatankupske4749]

Thank you so much bro!

[@johndcabrera593]

Great advice!

[@ak-ww8jr]

How are you?

[@sabrina3138]

Thinking that someone will still be thinking of my stupid statement months and weeks later is so me lol. It literally sounds hilarious cuz its me.

[@SaraSara-mo4ik]

Your so good at give advice❤️

[@DanTraxex]

Well a mind travels as it wants to sometimes. I can fake confidence, and some think that i am actually a pretty confident guy even though its just an act. Actually being that guy seems impossible and stupid to me.

[@slslldkxhc2807]

whats the solution

[@josho9627]

Youre very good at this just checked you out keep it up

[@shivangikatariya7364]

your videos are amazing 😊

[@NavjotSinghpatiala]

Very good

[@Combatkings100]

Yo lets hit up timmies if your ever in Calgary bro

[@raelkaz7828]

Thank you man

[@SaraSara-mo4ik]

I love it soooooo much it make me much confident please do more video I need it ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️😥

[@sumanthapa1924]

Are you related to Sheldon Cooper??

[@SC-cq9ie]

Thanks alot

[@NavjotSinghpatiala]

Very Helpfull

[@Pose005]

Amazing!

[@SimonB.]

And dont judge others!

[@melissaworld91]

I love this video

[@zestamore]

I love ekhart tolle, I went to one of his shows

[@omodaraseun8984]

I need help

[@rafaelleandro4657]

Make a video about trembling. ^^ Man, my right hand and arm dont tremble even when i am shitting my pants. But my left... it trembles like i am to take a shot.

[@CantWeedThis]

Haha I do all thirteen of those to an extreme. Sigh.

[@begumshamseara6729]

I'm born without confidence I can't make a single friends

[@andrewkrylov1501]

Just continue studying yourself. Reading book about your problems and it'll get better.

[@TherealEricaEarl]

On Facebook I'm constantly posting about insecure people trying to point out what I see wrong so that they can improve themselves but not only do they not want to see it here in Oregon knowledge it they talk shit to me or just blatantly ignore me instead of using me as an inspiration to make themselves better feel like I'm talking to a wall and I feel like they all think I'm crazy and stuck up

[@DarklightALBANIA]

Do you know you talk a little like Peter Thiel? Do you watch him

[@knowledgeisthepower1]

nice jumper

[@ozil1807]

thank u #sean

[@carsten7551]

Awesome

[@SaraSara-mo4ik]

Keep do videos please

[@bethlanglois9361]

What’s up fellow infp 👋

[@andrewkrylov1501]

I hate the word confidence. It seems silly. Also you say not to compare yourself to the others but it feels that I need to compare myself to these confident people that are much better than me. Overall I liked your video, just not a fan of such titles and terminology.

[@andrewkrylov1501]

The 4th advice can be even damaging. People with serious depression shouldn't just ignore it and feeling so called sorry for themselves is important for healing.

[@peacepeace8662]

you are intelligent....

[@bycourtesy7028]

The expression "calculated risk" is an oxymoron.A risk is a risk.