#205

This week Moshe and Natasha are back to discuss their child using KZbin conventions in videos, Moshe’s attempt at mindfulness meditation, and if Natasha is too old to say “slay.” They give advice to one caller in a tricky nannying situation and another who has fallen for one of her escorting clients.
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[@user-tm4sh8yh1i]

I have social work degrees and currently work with a parenting program in Texas, and I wanted to offer some thoughts on the first caller's question. Firstly, in the state of Texas any person over the age of 18 is a mandated reporter. You do not have to be licensed or work in a particular professional field. Also, you can make anonymous reports to CPS. Lastly, its important to remember that you are not responsible for determining if what is happening is actually abuse. That is what CPS does. If you suspect that what is occurring may be abuse, you should report. This is a very hard situation, and I'm holding this caller close in my thoughts. I've made multiple CPS reports and continued working with families. Unfortunately, the CPS system is very flawed (especially in Texas), but its the only system we have to address these issues.

[@HH-gv8mx]

Texas AND Florida both have terrible social programs. And both of their governors should be arrested. I hope the caller makes the report. It seems like she’s the only one who may be able to advocate for this little eight year old. And mosha is right. If something isn’t corrected soon, that innocent eight year old, is gonna turn into a 13-year-old asshole.

[@rebeccacavazos]

Therapist here, the danger of not reporting the more extreme situations is that if something worse happens then she may have negative consequences for herself. Also, even if CPS does nothing the report gets documented & a record can be created over time. This can be very important since she is hearing disclosure from the child or witnessing it firsthand. It's not like she's hearing about it 3rd party.

[@carolyntalbot947]

That's a good point. It's very important that she gets something written/recorded for when these parents inevitably smear her--they may have started already to protect themselves, knowing she has witnessed and disapproves of their behavior. A paper trail is crucial, especially if she is called to testify in court.

[@vanessawhitneypro]

She needs to report them. Period. If nothing else, she is showing that little girl that someone CARES about her enough to tell someone... I got sick at my stomach hearing her phone call... This isn't "borderline" abuse... It's ABUSE.

[@erintheokay]

Exactly this.

[@jacoblesley1802]

Spanking is Spanking. Across the face, hanging up threats and the rest, is adults throwing a prolonged tantrum. Adults who have the internet and no excuses, fucking yikes. Just another black hole sucking and throwing out shrapnel. I hope that my gratitude gets through to you guys. You say above your pay grade, but I glean more quality and useful information from you " guys lol, than anyone I have paid. Truly. I was hit by my mom and all my aunties. I will spare you the details. But it does get worse. What about boarding school? Ps masks save on sunscreen babieeees !🎉❤

[@clevermissfox]

The nanny is in a hard situation but if she's calling to find out what to do , it needs to be reported. The guidance counselor idea is good so someone at school knows too. The kid needs to be protected. And def be her solid ally. Let her know you've got her back like Natasha said. If the girl is telling anyone who will listen whats happening, she's literally crying out for help and protection. She wants someone to care and be outraged and take action. physical abuse aside, the psychological abuse she's experiencing may be even more damaging in the long run. Curious what the nanny sister thinks if she was watching the girl first.

[@bettier]

Abuse is a black hole of gravitational terror and that poor nanny is now in a survivor's guilt cycle. I wish her all the best. ❤

[@HH-gv8mx]

I can’t stop laughing at HEY GUYS! Adolf sounds like a handful. 😂

[@michaeljacksin9367]

its comforting to know that my parents couldn't give me the love I needed because they were too busy trying to pretend to not be psychotic

[@baileycaful]

I think the least the nanny should do is tell the school principal or counselor. They will (most likely) know what to do.

[@OmegaSlice108]

I love that Moshe is talking about mindfulness, lets get an update next episode how that practice is going. The inches and centimeters sounds about right. No free lunch!

[@MsAngelia26]

Meditation is the only way that has given me space between stimulus and response. You mentioned limbic brain- and you’re right. Reactivity is the sympathetic nervous system running the show. Meditation taps into your parasympathetic nervous system and creates new neural pathways in your brain that allow your body to stay neutral when (formerly) triggered. Like Viktor Frankl says…Freedom!

[@ericcraw]

Great empathy & compassion in this episode, N & M. Appreciate you. ✌️💗 Eric

[@carolyntalbot947]

Natasha looks so cute, that red jacket is a whole vibe.

[@carterrodriquez7494]

Hey Moshe, long time. love the pod Anyway, the primary mental health reason to not hit a child is because you are teaching them that you can control people with violence. Of course there are numerous other reasons that branch off of that but that’s the first logical step (on the road to peac and love for all humanity. )

[@FrauWehner]

here are my two cents re: the first caller: definitely report the parents (to the counselor or CPS) and show them all the things you've documented, do not confront the parents and try to stay out of their way. they seem like vengeful people and might even go after you personally. I also agree with Moshe that this abuse is very likely only going to escalate much further if it's not becoming more violent, it might become sexual. this child needs to be taken out of that environment. I don't agree that taking her out would be 'atomic', it's what's in order with that much abuse going on for all this time! good luck to you and to the little girl!

[@clevermissfox]

The unfortunate thing is that we can never be sure what environment the child will end up in w CPS, will it be worse than the current environment? who knows but I think it's gotta be done and pull the trigger and give the kid a chance.

[@Bribri-us9yh]

For comedies, y'all give great advice!

[@Fernandoza]

HEY GUYS!, Whenwever I'm having a bad day you fix it

[@sararocks3126]

Please report CPS (first caller) and let the child know you are a safe adult to confide in and come to. The report coming from the counselor will be 3rd party having much less weight compared to you who has witnessed abuse first hand and has it documented over years- moshe is right that wellness check will likely not come of anything however getting your report on record is the goal to demonstrate a pattern and give the girl a leg to stand on if the abuse escalates as she grows older and needs to be believed. The fact that the parents have an outward appearance of being good parents with healthy values and have good standing in the community (most abusers do) will make it more challenging for the child to report the abuse and be believed/taken seriously by other adults who know the family.

[@karlGiant]

Live for this show. Thank you!

[@kfreshdetroit]

20:38 Don't listen to Natasha! I love your mindfulness talk Moshe!

[@clevermissfox]

Emily, I wish they had asked how long you have been in love w this client for but from one escort to another, if it's less than a year dont quit the agency yet.

[@Emily2002xo]

Ive been in love with him for 8 months (met each other 10 months ago) we’ve been seeing each other. Took their advice (slightly) said I need a few months off as a sabbatical. I live with him now. But am still considering the agency. As you probably know it’s difficult.

[@Ci-D3]

Love you guys, love the pod and also natasha pulling off that jacket.

[@erintheokay]

Is Jodi, the nanny from Dallas the same Jodi, the nanny from Dallas who called in at the beginning of the pandemic about her terrible boyfriend? Would love that update but either way, Jodi, you are a mandatory reporter. That poor kid is being emotionally and physically abused. If they do this in front of you/with your know, what's being hidden? Please report this. You mentioned it being cultural and that's not an excuse. At the very least, it will be documented.

[@Bec_love]

Love the hair Tash 😍

[@michaeljacksin9367]

I always knew hey guys was soul crushing but this is the exact reason why. theres gonna be such a big gap in the creativity level in entertainment in the future thank god it registered as horrifying prayers up to those other kids

[@Olivierstreet]

Emily needs to link that OF!!

[@alexandrasandback1202]

Hi from Finland 😅

[@SWHBOYCE]

Hi !!!..." and I'm Lawrence , from Euphoria..."...😁

[@SailorGreenTea]

3:49, jealous is fiercely protective and vigilant over people's rights and possessions.

[@LukeHotwagner]

Fabulous ep

[@aroguereptilian]

This episode was gold❤ moshe n natasha are sweet parents, lead the way✊

[@mandoville]

Just been loving following these to .i wonder if its noticiable...i am super sensitive right now

[@michaeljacksin9367]

I think I first when on youtube when I was 8 but it was still creative like smash sketches and stuff

[@LeslieDugger]

Literally went wee wee wee wee all the way home.

[@natalieevenew]

I'm sorry but Natasha's so glamorous and beautiful all the time

[@GG69355]

That first secret 😂😂😂

[@diegesisfreak]

y'all need to call therapy gecko about this hey guys thing before it gets out of hand

[@marmar19890]

My favey wavey couple

[@ayeshabezzina5426]

The abuse needs to be reported!! Documenting it and keeping to yourself is no good, if something worse was to happen and you know you had this info and didn't give it to the state would make you feel so guilty. We also know often the abused become abusers (feel like you illuded to parents having been victims) you don't want this sweet kid to think she should punish people cruelly when she's an older kid or adult. I understand your fear of them getting mad at her but standing back and waiting won't make them stop, letting the school and/or state know could potentially bring a change. The girl sounds like she is pretty vocal about what happens, shes telling an adult she trusts (you) then she is hoping to will help to make them stop.

[@ohnoourtableitsbroken6527]

Absolutely report to cps!!! As a social worker who worked in family services with parents who did inappropriate discipline you need to have these things on record to build a case if something worse happens. Also if you go to the school they will have to report to cps right away anyway so cut out the middleman

[@michaeljacksin9367]

have you ever heard the original southern nights by Allen Toussaint

[@mjoyyourself]

I’m Finish American 3rd generation 🙋🏻

[@SWHBOYCE]

48:49...Uh Oh ; the ' belt-club...' my empathy for all those that experience that B.S. !!!

[@Daddy.loves.you.]

Lmao! Calm down you guys. She's just emulating modern media/tv. My sister's favorite movie was 101 Dalmatians and she spent 2 years acting like a dog.

[@SailorGreenTea]

3:01, interesting word

[@SWHBOYCE]

!! Buenas,Buenos !!! "Slay " is high-fashion appropriate .I learned this from the Kleins and Howie Mandel . 😄🤑...( 2...Two 'descriptive' words missing here : a slap anywhere is violence and generally doesn't stop ; the other really strange thing to consider is the word ' pleasure' that these bully - parents might be feeling and that's a very f...ted- up reality possibility......

[@HH-gv8mx]

Mosha is smart and funny which is super sexy. I think he gives great advice most of the time. He and Chelsea Handler actually give their callers really good advice. Both of them would make great therapists. What is with Natasha’s Michael Jackson outfit?

[@leonblythe3194]

I thought that Moshe would be the more tanned of the duo what with his love of the beach and surfing

[@mjoyyourself]

Hey guys ✌️

[@michaeljacksin9367]

tell the girl to record the parents doing fucked up stuff and then send it to them whenever thats a possibility narcissism and delusion go hand in hand I guess they might just not look at it but if they did it would at least raise their blood pressure

[@bluesmama3726]

Such a nightmare living with someone who's reactive

[@SailorGreenTea]

1:26, 😆

[@natalieacosta5556]

I'm going to take a guess and say the kid's name is Frida. Or Frieda? It's "cosmopolitan" and unique without being weird :)

[@CodysFavorites]

So funny

[@hannahtate4257]

Can anyone tell me what Natasha notes down throughout every podcast?

[@bryanminugh9680]

Possible titles, for the episode they're making.

[@daphneglasurus7886]

I like that you guys are assuming this guy is basically good because he’s so into her, and I really hope that’s true, but I really think she needs to find at least one person who has slept with him to talk about it. She needs to have a solid idea of how he might react if she stopped sex in the middle of it. Talk to one woman whose slept with this guy and ask her if he was respectful of boundaries. It’s completely reasonable to expect at least one woman to vet this guy, because I think the only chance you’ll feel comfortable enough to have sex with him is by having some idea that he’ll respect you if you say STOP.

[@araganastar3453]

Rottweiler sweet and loving,cuddly to whole family but will let a MFer know.

[@michaeljacksin9367]

member chugi

[@colle31]

The mother (boss of nanny) is a malignant narcissist. Quit soon. Keep it cordial and never look back.

[@roberth7894]

This episode could've been titled "The things people do for money". For the first caller I'd say why has she been staying in a caregiving job where the people have been obviously consistently abusive? It's abusive to her to have to witness that. I get that maybe she was trying to help the child, but in the long run can she really expect that? The second caller, obviously a very attractive woman in the golden handcuffs situation, I give her a 1 in 10 chance of making that work. Sure, he can provide for her but he can also say, "I'm bored" and then vanishes. Sex workers and long term relationships are virtually incompatible. I wish her well though.

[@Pandi-Fackler]

As far as the first caller goes, she’s stayed because she cares about the kid and wants her to know someone believes and supports her. What she’s been made to witness in that house is awful but it even worse for that poor little girl. If they’re treating her like that in front of others, who’s to say what they’re doing to her when no one’s looking

[@Pandi-Fackler]

I do agree though that the second caller needs to figure out a game plan outside of sex work while in this relationship because men can be fickle

[@HamzaFarooqui21]

Honestly I think you guys are freaking out about the hey guys thing. I think it's quite cute and endearing that she is being so creative. Don't be scared of this technological transition, although it makes sense since you guys are old parents. Your daughter sounds cool and fun, you should support her instead of punishing her for something shes inspired by. Btw it's kinda hypocritical that yall are "technophobic" when your careers are literally on the internet. This podcast for example. You have youtube and instagram etc. You probably are on your phones all the time outside of this too.

[@giaafshar8419]

but if everybody was hitting their kid in the 60’s it was considered normal so i think it’s a lot worse hitting ur kids now. my parents spanked my brother and sister but i was born a decade later and they didn’t hit me.

[@LeaveAhNah]

Hey guys! I hate to say it, but I think the effort to restrict your daughter’s screen time and internet usage is backfiring (as all taboos do). It’s like being raised in a Christian household, but Sheena Is A Punk Rocker. I would suggest Natasha lean all in on being a KZbin momager and hold her to your high Natasha standards. Hopefully she gets sick of it and is disinterested because her moms in to it; or worse comes to worse and she becomes a karate KZbin star and buys you a house in five years.

[@blakedixon8549]

young millennial latinos definitely got spanked. pow pow! but miami is definitely behind in the world of how to parent

[@dot_t]

Hey Guys! We got hit with a wooden spoon and would give each other advice on the best way to endure it. "I tightened my butt really hard and it didn't hurt as much." Also had to write sentences I think we called them standards? Oh the 70's as a child LoL 😂 Love you! Have a wonderful day! ❤️✨

[@figgettit]

lol?!

[@palo5a]

uh thats not okay

[@dot_t]

@@palo5a you think I don't know that? I broke that generational trauma with my child. I never hit him. He has grown to be a beautiful soul and we have an awesome relationship for it, I believe. If you want respect you need to give respect and hitting someone is not respecting. ❤️✨

[@palo5a]

aw im happy to hear that, hope you’re well🤍🤍

[@michaeljacksin9367]

my parents would like brag about how shitty their childhood was while leaving me in the car to go shop for baskets for way too long

[@NOSALEBANKS]

Natasha, your kid needs to be computer literate. no macs.

[@juniperpruniper4935]

Can I become Jewish ?

[@NathanKSmith]

The irony of Natasha being upset about her daughter saying "check out more of me" when it's literally the definition of her career.

[@k.c.simonsen2]

How does Moshe put up with it? I would be out of that relationship so fast. Can't even talk about stuff without her fuckin coming down on him and being annoyed at everything. Gooooooodbyeeee

[@yasminsparrow695]

Hey guys! LOL! I was going to order the zebas, but they are made in China and I don't want to be supporting them right now with funds that they can buy ammunition with! (: LOVE the podcast!)