30 Non-Religious Reasons to Wait Until Marriage

I polled a few thousand women on two questions - "Why on earth does anybody choose to save sex for marriage?" and "Why is is worth it to live this way?" Hundreds of women answered - women who have committed to this, re-committed to this, and even women who did not choose this. Here are their responses!
1st video I referenced:
• I'm Sorry for All the ...
The Puppies and Bunnies Video:
• The Puppies and Bunnie...

[@emwilss]

Which one out of all of these was the most interesting or compelling to you?

[@jurgitamataciunaite2437]

Unfortunately, I didn’t wait until my marriage and it’s one of my biggest regrets 😐 Numbers 5 and 9 speaks directly to my heart ❤️

[@aramintawilliams5205]

Emily Wilson I basically knew most of these, but I like the not comparing them to other men or women.

[@sofiagenoves2221]

I agree with the problem of lusting over my ex bf, i really wish i could stop those thoughts. And the one i never take into account but is GREAT is that if you respect your future husband and your marriage before getting married how much respect one would have once youre married

[@isabelb2855]

All of them

[@tonyvu7246]

30

[@ideclarebankruptcy9077]

I am a 14 year old girl and about to start my freshmen year of high school and I know the peer pressure of having sex is going to be more and more the older I get but I am so happy I will have this video to look back on to help me resist the peer pressure thank you so much Emily

[@mariyaamiray5676]

Emily: I don't know who needs this video. Me: Every young person ever existed!!!

[@emwilss]

Thanks you two!

[@alexiamaynard8338]

I was having a doubts about continuing to save myself for marriage and this video just gave me the assurance of why I'm doing what I'm doing, thank God for this and thanks Emily, love your videos so much!

[@rebeccahomer6137]

Alexia Maynard same here alexia- Emily your ministry is amazing!!

[@LiLisLounge]

Don't give up! I'm a single 30 year old still waiting. And I have never for even a second regretted this decision! It's giving me so much wisdom and kept me from so many bad situations. You've got this and you are worth it!

[@MissAdamLambert888]

I wanted to share

[@marinkazhdanowa]

That's such a great video. I'm a Christian and that is my 1st reason why I decided not to have sex before marriage. But all those reasons, I DO agree with each of them.

[@emwilss]

I'm glad!

[@xygirlGwenTDFan]

As a young woman in a relationship with a young man, the best part of wating is the amount of free time we have to spend: we have taken different classes together, we watch series, movies, go to museums, play videogames, talk for hours. We also have plenty of time in planning our future, helping each other with our university studies, etcetera. And that is truly amazing, I feel that time lasts longer for us, that we get to have a big lot of amazing and diverse experiences in our lifes.

[@vicky_la_france]

This. Is. So. Good. I'm going to use these next time someone asks me about it. Another reason for me is that physical touch is my primary love language (hello, Gary Chapman). Therefore, I know that the most intimate physical act you can do with someone else will have a profound impact on me, and the only person I want to share that with is my husband.

[@emwilss]

Your self-awareness speaks volumes and that is very profound! Thanks for sharing Vicky!

[@margiehalpern4573]

I did not save sex for marriage--and I can say that several of these reasons to do so resonated with me based on my experience. Because sex worked to obscure the true nature of the relationship and made ending a relationship that wasn't right harder than it should have been. And, DUH, what should have been clear to me all along (but sometimes wasn't): anyone who pressures you in any way to do something you are reluctant to do...DOESN'T LOVE YOU.

[@eugeniyah8078]

These messages are so inspirational 💕 Reason #31: Waiting until marriage teaches you to be indifferent to what people think of you. Living in a hyper sexual society can easily convince us to conform, but when you go against “societal norms”, it makes you carefree.

[@emwilss]

Yes - learning to march to the beat of your own drummer is very important and very freeing!!

[@eugeniyah8078]

Emily Wilson Exactly 👍🏿

[@EmilyClaireDaly]

That’s a powerful list. I’m committed to recommitting and these reasons affirm why. Thankyou!

[@emwilss]

Thanks Emily :) I always appreciate your comments!

[@fionadonlon1372]

Good for you! You are a strong, godly women❤️

[@rebeccakuijpers6125]

I resonate so much with the women who didn't want to get pregnant outside of marriage. I see so many young women (we're talking teenagers here) getting pregnant, even though some were on birth control. They had to stop their education, some where forced to be married. It made me decide, even before my faith played a part in the decision, that I won't take that risk, period. You preach it girl, like you always do.

[@miriamlauzon386]

Simply giving my experience...I did not wait until marriage (even though that was the plan) and to be honest, what I regret most is the shame that was brought unto me because of this...! Now that we are married, this still lingers so I want to let you girls know, you girls who have not made it to the goal, that you are forgiven and what make your heart and your whole being pure, is the love of Jesus flowing through you!

[@jeydinho17]

Thank you Emily for sharing. Number 3 is a highlight, because lust is instantaneous and love become more overtime, it builds. Knowing that your SO loves and you love them is mind blowing and to consummate that love by physical intimacy is beyond mind blowing, I imagine. To girls and women watching: there are guys out there looking for women that think like many of the reasons the video talks about. Be patient and stay strong.

[@emwilss]

Yes! There! Are! You are absolutely correct!

[@colleenlongua9752]

#22 doesn't just apply to sex. Too much physical affection without real communication and commitment can make it really difficult to know when a relationship is on the rocks. It ties you emotionally to potentially unhealthy situations.

[@katielinder771]

I’ve stayed a virgin by choice; my last relationship was so close to sex that I had to physically say that we couldn’t see each other anymore. The Holy Spirit intervened (literally, thank the Lord). I now know he didn’t care for me. This video was very reassuring! Also: what is Emily’s email just wondering

[@megasurfer32]

I agree with #2, I just had a relationship end and it felt like the end of the world but I am sooo glad we were not sexually active with each other.

[@robinj1482]

My husband and I were each other’s firsts 7 months into dating. We didn’t have a faith back then. In the last six months of our engagement, we committed to sexual chastity. It was really hard after 8 years of dating and several years of living together. But we made it work. And honestly, making love together was suddenly SO much better once we were married! You let go of your guilt and fears completely and love each other so purely in that moment. I am really glad we decided to wait the last few months, although I wish I had that insight before! And I consider us very lucky to only know each other that way, it would have been so difficult with exes involved.

[@dorovahkiin]

Robin J wow, thank you so much for that strong testimony. Truly inspiring!

[@bryanacamillebraxton4770]

Number 1 resonated with me! I’m a Christian and I’m saving myself for marriage because I see my body as something valuable and precious. I’m not going to give that to just anyone.

[@thesportsanalyst4625]

I’m waiting for whomever God is calling me to, I know she is out there somewhere 🙂

[@haydenrose866]

Both my Girlfriend and I have both remained Celibate in our relationship with each other and it has seemed to do nothing but good for us. Neither of us are virgins, multiple sex partners but are re-committed to celibacy. I feel like I bond with her in a very special way because it forces us to Connect when you remove sex from the equation. To anybody who reads this, I deep down hope you all develop the Loving relationships or Marriages that you are looking to build. Sex can easily destroy and corrupt that which is good. Abstaining holds high value in developing a connection with someone you care about. You can’t go wrong when you go down the Celibate path.

[@manuelita467]

I feel like this decision filters out so many people and it’s more freeing than restricting. It’s spiritually healing as well. Love this video!

[@marketa7752]

I have decided to save sex for marriage after some years of feelings of uncertainty/hesitance to choose so. I can say that being sure about my decision have brought me so much peace, freedom and happiness. My main reasons are to protect and value myself and to obey God.

[@catherinewilliams1263]

As a recent graduate of high school, I witnessed other friends and classmates giving themselves to boyfriends who never truly cared about them, and later would eventually breaking up with them for that reason. I am so grateful that I am saving myself for marriage, because there was never any pressure in my dating experiences, and I just had fun with the guys I went out with! I was able to build lasting friendships, and I knew that I wasn't compromising anything for my future husband :) By far the best thing I have ever committed to, at the age of 12.

[@athena6653]

I have another one that I remind myself frequently: saving sex and remaining chaste while dating builds a strong foundation should you and your future spouse ever need to abstain if using NFP

[@maddybrown2320]

30 is one of the main reasons I am saving myself

[@emwilss]

That was very important to me, too!

[@undomiel466]

I'm not religious and I'm not saving myself for marriage, but I completely agree with you. I noticed, from my friends' experience, that sex makes them continue relationships which aren't good otherwise. I said "from my friends' experience" and not mine because my boyfriend and I had waited for 7 years before having sex and I have never been with someone else, so I kind of feel like we benefit all the pros of waiting, even though we didn't wait until marriage. After all, for us it's not as crucial as for a christian would be (we're getting married in two years, by the way). What I can say is that was totally worthy to wait until we felt married in our hearts, if that makes sense, and I hope I can transmit this value to our children one day. The deep and pure trust that waiting can give you towards your significant other is priceless. Sorry for mistakes, I'm still learning english!

[@Ccaarrooification]

Thank you for this! I am not religious at all but I love your outlook on life so its noce you hear you talk about it in a non religious way.

[@blobbins17]

I love all these reasons. My main reason is my commitment to God whilst I wait for the right man (I’m Muslim). Pray for me internet sisters - that I find a good husband soon!

[@AAC4808]

This could not be more timely in my life! I’ve been struggling with my faith lately, and though I have waited to have sex, it becomes that much more difficult to rationalize waiting when going through difficult times. So I’ve had to come up with my own list of non-religious reasons to bolster my convictions in times of struggle. Awesome video idea!

[@bubblegumpeach5662]

One thing I find disturbing is that people get shamed for wanting to wait sometimes, it's just crazy!

[@tracylarsey8389]

So glad I am still waiting. For me my reason is to give myself to one man, my hubby . Thanks Emily😘

[@LizziesAnswers]

YASSSS!!! You are queen! 👸🏼 I love how intense you have always been in defending... this is THE MOST important topic in how it leads to the destruction of the family unit. Thank you for being so courageous 💗

[@Shadeadder]

Boyfriend and I are waiting a few years until after graduation to get married. Some people are completely awed by our "self control". But it's easier when you understand all of this. It's not hard. Well, it's not hard in the sense of constantly being on the brink of failure. But it can be hard emotionally not to share that intimacy yet.

[@quesavolontesoitfete]

Need to write those down! 🔥 Thank you Emily, thank you Jesus

[@emwilss]

Glad you like it Soph!

[@HaleyMary]

#3 that one speaks so much truth! It really hurts when you like a guy and you think he likes you back, but all he wants is sex. I've never given into the pressure to have sex, but it still makes me feel like something is wrong with me for having a crush on a guy who likes me, but not to the extent that I like him. The main struggle I have now is a lot of guys approach me, but I have zero interest in them and don't find them attractive at all and most of them aren't christian and some drink and smoke and I don't drink or smoke. The ones who don't drink or smoke who have expressed interest, don't believe in God as much as I believe, so it sometimes feels like it's hopeless out there. I also have the pregnancy fear, as I'm not ready to raise a child and I also have an irregular cycle that's unpredictable, so the risks aren't worth it, not to mention the amount of stds and stis that can be caught in these modern times. My parents didn't get married until two weeks before I was born. My mom told me the story of being in the doctor's office and getting the news she was pregnant and although my dad and her had been together for ten years, he hadn't proposed to her and wasn't that happy when he heard the news. I know in my heart that I want commitment before I ever have sex.

[@abigailbetts3421]

This was so helpful! Knowing the why has always been the best way for me to abstain from something. Thank you so much Emily you have been such a blessing to my life! I ran into your channel in November when I was about to give up on waiting and God has been working in my life through you ever since.

[@chloesalisbury2106]

So good. Definitely reasons to add to my list- such amazing wisdom❤️

[@emwilss]

Glad you liked the video Chloe! thank you!

[@danceninja21]

Amazing! Thank you to all the ladies who participated in that survey 🤗

[@emilycalhoun2606]

Thank you so much for doing this! Sharing what is true and what you believe in no matter what others may think or judge you, this is truly inspiring and so is everything you preach ❤️👏👏❤️

[@emwilss]

Thanks girl. That means a lot to me!

[@jolson9]

I'm a guy but watching your videos still gives me so much insight and inspiration on how I can be a man of God and why I'm doing it. Thank you for sharing!

[@SunshineBloom777]

These were so good! Such an encouragement too! So glad you shared these! 💛

[@emwilss]

Thanks Jake and Mandy!

[@zamiramuniz6492]

No comparison and no fear of mistakes. 🙌🏼

[@TOAGM]

So much YESSSS! Thank you for creating much needed content for the women (and men) of today.

[@blaineyeamlak]

#33: you won't be caught up in baby mama/daddy culture (and your future kids will one day thank you too)

[@cloelynch]

I love that you talk about this. I feel like nobody addresses this topic as straight and objectively as you do!... I must say I confirmed my desition of living chastity a few months ago because of one of your vídeos, and every day I realize that I couldn't have chosen any better. It's also good and conforting to see non-religious reasons why you should wait, since there are a lot of benefits, whether religious or not!... Thank you Emily for speaking the truth and encouraging me and other women to follow this beautiful path! Lots of hugs!

[@BeccahJoy]

I am so thrilled you made this. Loved it!!!

[@ingridkay5082]

I really liked the one about how it makes you bond in different ways. My boyfriend and I have learned so much about each other through not being physical, for instance we're able to support each other through both of our mental illnesses. And honestly, that is one thing that gets me through the hard times better than others.

[@alicjazareba7225]

This video is sooo good and sooo important, thank you Emily❤️

[@whitneesand2578]

Wow, I love this! I decided to wait until marriage a few years ago, and this was a good reminder for the reasons behind I’m waiting. Thank you for sharing this 💛

[@katien3022]

Thank you! This will be so useful I’m sure later in life when I’m questioned. It’s not just religious, although that is part for some. I really found value in every reason!

[@TheBlushBrunette]

This video made me so happy. I was smiling the entire way through. Thank you emily for soildifying my promise to myself.

[@jgirl203]

Emily you are amazing! I absolutely love this video, keep encouraging other women for the best that God has for them.

[@ambrosiawoliver8958]

Though The Lord is my #1, my Mama is the 2nd, and self respect is the 3rd reason I made the decision to wait, these are such good reasons also!! I’d never seen it from some of those perspectives. Thank you for making this!! 💖

[@An0nH4x0r3z]

Personally I think the "religious" reasons are the most important and the ones that everyone should have as their primary reasons to observe chastity. I don't think people who lack sanctifying grace and a relationship with God are standing on any foundations strong enough to ever observe chastity well. God makes us perfect

[@themissmeek]

This is one of the BEST christian videos I've ever seen! Praise God for this!!!! It's awesome. What made it so powerful is that so many people think it's wrong or out of date to wait. They aren't looking at the logistics of waiting and God's great wisdom, love, and brilliance of designing sex for marriage. It makes more sense to wait, whether or not one knows God's reasons for advising this. It's more exciting to wait for just one person anyway. It's like saving it as we would a valuable collectible that is handled with care to be given to someone that would value it just as much, if not more. I think one reason that stood out to me was the idea of having been with someone, and then when it was over they act like they hadn't known her or just ignored her. I wouldn't want to experience that. God is only trying to protect us from so much pain. Pride keeps some people from seeing that simple truth.

[@vickyvazz]

Such a lovely video, as always, Emily!

[@Hannah-hb8wl]

thank you so much I've been thinking about this a lot and now I'm absolutely sure I want to!! I really hope I am going to save myself for marriage and won't let me push into anything I don't want

[@Taniesha__]

All of these reasons are so informative, I love how much wisdom is in each of them

[@larafinan4524]

This was so inspiring, Emily! Your videos help me to keep going in my pursuit of recommitting. I notice the mention of how waiting until marriage allows you to not compare the performance of past people you dated, but if you are recommitting, how do you stop yourself from comparing? On a broader note, how do you feel "enough" for your future husband who may have waited his whole life? Could you possibly make a video solely on recommitting and how to navigate that? Thanks so much and love your videos!!!

[@ashlyngott14]

Thank you Emily!!! 🎉This adds more reasons to my list and reminded me why I have one in the first place. Your honesty and clearness have made an impact in my life... I have always belived its extremely important for us to have a strong foundation to what we believe and this video, along with others on your channel' have made it clear and easy to understand.💓 As a Christian teen I for a while I thought that waiting was just something I was supposed to do . Now saving sex for marriage doesn't seam so heavy anymore, and I'm glad I made a commitment long ago..!!💟

[@aimee4768]

Thank you for making this video! I've saved it for future reference 😊

[@annan.9966]

Best video on KZbin! Thank you so much, Emily!!!

[@emwilss]

Hey thanks Anna I'm glad you liked it!

[@GinnyandEric]

Suchhhhh an important topic to address. Love love love!

[@vivallina]

Yes Emily, another great video. Changing the world!

[@carolineurena8509]

I love the puppies and bunnies saying! 💖

[@dannicula2872]

Omg, I can not believe that you read my comment on the previous video. I'm so glad that you make this video. I write this, before i watch the video because i'm really grateful and i know that it will be the most amazing eight minutes of my life. Thank you!

[@pinsertlastname6360]

I don't usually comment on videos, but I have a question. Why can't I like a video more than once? I relate to all of these, but especially # 3. Great video!

[@emwilss]

Well thanks for commenting! I really appreciate it! :)

[@andread20]

i wish i could like this video a BILLION times. i really liked your approach and i am confident that you're shaping a whole generation of women!!

[@juliannabutler2378]

This is one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever watched!

[@marinna582]

I truly love your channel and it's really nice to hear all this arguments

[@greenmonkey1528]

I cannot recommend you enough to my sisters even tho I have already told almost every woman I know about you and to watch you I wish I could knew more people to tell about you to lol! I just feel like your videos and channel are so essential for young people this day in age and what’s great about you being on this platform is those who wouldn’t get this kind of mentality bc they were never religious and never went to a church maybe they wouldn’t have anyone in their life that thinks like this or can model this behavior. I think a big reason why more young people are being sexually active earlier & earlier is bc they never had any other example or didn’t know anyone who lived otherwise. From here on KZbin all walks of life are exposed to you, I think that’s great keep up the amazing videos! 🙌🏻👍🏻

[@maripiensas9984]

#24 is so excellent! Thanks for this vid, Emily!

[@saarakarhu3415]

One reason I thought about when I made this decision was that my virginity will be the most beautiful wedding gift I can give my husband 😊 (And he to me too, but back then I couldn't know yet)

[@alphaalembe9701]

Wow, this video makes me even sure of why I want stay a virgin until marriage... Thanks Emily, I'll share this with my friends

[@BeautyByJodi]

This is SUCH great advice! Wow!

[@teeandtayintex]

I'm just here to say that the puppies and bunnies video concept is brilliant.

[@gbnas]

I love this video and I haven’t even watched it yet! I appreciate this so much!!

[@emwilss]

I'm glad you do, Georgia! Thank you!

[@noormuzahid9008]

They should show this video at every sex ed class.

[@KarlaVArana]

Ohhh myy!! Thank you for this ❤ I was waiting for this vide 😍

[@breadncheeseplz8713]

I'm so glad you made this video🙏💞

[@iulianamazu5548]

Absolutely love this!

[@annikad.457]

Thank you so much! You give me the feeling not to be alone with my decisions. ❤️ Thank you

[@emwilss]

Indeed - you are not alone at all! Keep your heart up!

[@erinnicole4113]

As much as I really want to wait (at this point in time, I'm not having much of a choice but to), and all the reasons listed for waiting are reasons I have given to myself to recommit to waiting, my problem always lies in, "IF you are called to marriage." What if I am never called to marriage and I'm just sitting here wasting my youth... and I never again get to share this most fundamental human experience? I recognize that this is a fear-based notion ...

[@Ariel_dorsey]

This is so good! Women have such diverse and beautiful perspectives! I love us!

[@thivhafunimuthelo2461]

Thank you for this Emily

[@badichinniah3804]

Hey Emily, I really enjoyed this video. Prior to watcing it, I was investigating this topic by looking at other sources. Unfortunately, most of them had only religious reasons, and as someone who is not only religious but also craves logical reasoning (like the majority of people), such sources were "just not enough". Thankfully, I came across your video and I really appreciate how you provided such reasons that almost anyone can relate to and reflect upon. Consequentially, this enabled me to connect these reasons with my religious beliefs, hence causing me to have a much stronger faith in God. I hope you continue making these videos that discuss about important topics such as these. Hope everything is okay back there. Stay safe! :-)

[@ddraper4819]

#10 is golden! dont have to worry about “getting caught” and have your own house to do it in. Also no worries about stds

[@andreadomo-ibea7078]

I’ve commented on other similar videos you make and the funny thing is, every time you post a new one of these, someone or a group of people had recently tried to shake me down. From the moment a nun in my 6th grade class taught us abstinence only, I took her seriously and took it to heart. I went all throughout my highschool & college years having to to explain myself to my friends (I’m so blessed I have friends on the same page as me and or respect my choice), snobby bullies, creepers/catcallers in public places, ex boyfriends,and my current boyfriend’s work mates. Through the years it became more than “ they taught us this in Catholic School.” It became almost all these reasons. I’m 22 years old now. 6th grade was 11 years ago. It’s been a rough 11 years.......... I can understand that not everyone is going to be so kind about this decision... But I’m happy to play videos like this knowing I’m not the only one who feels this way. Numbers 15,17,24,26,and 30 really stood out to me.

[@deion312]

Great Video Emily. Thank you

[@gracelohman9223]

I’m a Christian and this video is so dang good and explains things well for anyone who doesn’t first of all think that they should save sex for marriage because God says so!!! I really love this!!!! 💖💖💖

[@beibhinnoleary]

Brilliant video thank you ❤️

[@HM-rw5dz]

Thank you so much for your guidance 💗

[@deb5787]

100% agree with each reason!

[@emwilss]

:)

[@sharielm363]

GIRL THIS VIDEO IS SO GOOD

[@samarabrasilian]

I'm saving myself for marriage. I know it is very difficult sometimes but God is in our heart. Stay strong. Watching this video made me strenghth my faith in God. Thank u 😍

[@haleykuchar6782]

Great vid but also I love your shirt! It’s so cute ❤️😂

[@fatemehkhojasteh8760]

reason 30 was AMAZING ! thank you so much for this video

[@MaryScarpati]

Great reasons, Emily. 💜

[@TheCrunchyCatholics]

Great video Emily!