5 Signs That You Might Be Greysexual

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[@almasakic1148]

I would also really add that for greysexuals (like myself) there is a real sense of ongoing confusion and discomfort when it comes to having any sexual feelings when they do arise. In the sense that, they happen so infrequently that when they do, it often has this very 'out of left-field' feeling, like a 'what is happening to me' feeling. I often struggle with whether I'm feeling aesthetic, emotional or physical attraction to someone, and then when they person is gone and not in my presence, I feel a palpable sense of relief. This, and other signs, to me made me realize I am graysexual.

[@AlePuffa]

Disculpa por escribir en español, pero google puede traducirlo. Creo que no todos los graysexual sienten un rechazo al sexo todo el tiempo, si se está muy alegre o en un momento donde se sienta mucho cariño por alguien y se pase un momento divertido, la sensación puede llegar a ser placentera, aunque dure muy poco, mucho menos que las personas que no son ace, si la relación es mala y no existe buena comunicación, y la otra persona piensa en sexo, será incómodo. Esto lo digo porque es como decir, que todas las personas tímidas posean el trastorno de la personalidad evitativa, cosa que no es así, hay distintos tipos de timidez, causas, la grisexualidad es más amplia de lo que parece, creo que pertenezco a eso, sin embargo no estoy del todo segura porque no he tenido novios, pero no pienso que este bien generalizar a las personas por sus gustos e intereses, quizás por eso no me siento parte del lgbtq+, pero cada quien es libre de pensar lo que quiera

[@Cocoanutty0]

Thank you for mentioning the relief part. It’s something I’ve experienced that I used to say I was afraid of men, and sometimes women, but it was only people I thought were also aesthetically attractive. Not knowing what is going on with my brain and body when they are around, getting nervous, feeling extremely shy, and relieved when they leave is probably my flavor of attraction manifesting as nervous energy because I don’t recognize it for what it is, nor know how to act on it.

[@fleurvnrcisse]

thats so alike to me, when my hormones go insane i know i shouldnt feel that way but i cant control it so yeah

[@PloverTechOfficial]

I’ve always just called myself mildly asexual but now I understand another term, thank you!

[@ZachSkagen]

Yes! For me I’m still confused what I am. Right now I’m identifying as asexual. But I’ve used “Less-sexual” before yeahhh realllly clever 😂😂💀

[@JonathanH]

Funnily enough I referred to myself as "Ace-adjacent" for the longest time 😅

[@gabidoo9304]

Yess I did the same thing!!

[@gabidoo9304]

I would say I’m “fairly asexual” 😂

[@myname-mz3lo]

it will keep going until there as as many terms as there are people on earth lol

[@zalhararena4831]

I have had the thought for years that I was asexual but always dismissed it because I thought asexual was none whatsoever. Having learned more over this past month about the asexual spectrum has made a lot of things much clearer for me. Still a lot of soul searching to do, but I think I'm on the path finally.

[@sillyface6950]

I wish you luck with finding yourself ♡

[@Bookwormtalksabout]

I’m happy for you

[@kaseyford1490]

I found out I was Aromantic on Pride week 2023(coincidence and unintentional of course). Then after watching all these videos of Lynn and her sister, I figured out I'm Asexual too. Say hello to the new Aroace me 😊

[@lucy_with_me]

I’ve been panicking for weeks trying to work out why I’m both asexual and attracted to women and now I know. How did it take me this long when I’ve literally called myself queer for YEARS 😭 Thank you!

[@christyfielding7498]

It took me literally a couple decades to realize I'm greysexual. When I was younger I mixed romantic attraction with sexual attraction. I didn't know the difference. Plus I was also one of those people who equates self worth and affection with sex. I had to get drunk or at least tipsy to have sex. Why that wasn't a red flag to me I still don't know. I'm 44 now and am so happy I've discovered who I really am and don't feel the need to find a partner. I was in a 13 year abusive relationship with a man that the majority of our fights started over my not wanting to have sex. He just didn't understand how I could love him, want to be with him and not want to have sex. It's hard to find someone that really understands that sex isn't that important (or at all) to some people.

[@Witchy_Cheree1982]

It feels like it took me a long time to accept what I always kind of knew. I kept thinking I was going to meet “the one” who would make me feel “normal.” I have also been very happy being single. It’s been 8 years for me. I’m happier than ever.

[@astrosci1109]

Guys can anyone tell me the difference between romantic attraction and platonic attraction? I am so confused between them so pls?

[@AnthroFiend]

Thank you so much for clarifying the difference between sexual attraction and libido. I’m not greysexual myself, but it would have been easier to figure out that I was ace if I’d know that libido isn’t attraction and that asexuality is a spectrum, since I’m not super duper ultra sex repulsed. Not sex favorable either, I just don’t have a problem with sexual content in media.

[@ecowo57]

I don't know if I'm greysexual, but I do feel that thing of not knowing if what I'm feeling for someone is sexual attraction. But I still have a libido, I just (usually) wouldn't want to do something with someone when it's high. Idk if that makes sense

[@anvithequarsonist]

I think that’s called quoisexual :)

[@etherious4252]

I FEEL THE SAME AND I CANT FIGURE OUT

[@ecowo57]

@@etherious4252 someone suggested to me aegosexual and I think it really fits me

[@remysbasement]

libido is different from the sexual attraction you may experience though! Of which the latter determines if you're grey/allo/ace/etc. :)

[@mckenziecatlin8422]

@@ecowo57 you just helped me figure out my sexuality. Wow. Thank you!

[@poppyseedmuffin4390]

You know it was Jaiden’s being not straight video that made me start doing more research into acesexual attraction and then also brought me to your channel. After doing so much research and then finally your video, yeah both me and my GF have come to realize we’re both greysexual!

[@GhostInTraining]

when i told my boyfriend i was ace, he said i just needed to get used to it and that it was just trauma from my last relationship (but that isnt even true), but i think im just greysexual?? but afraid if i tell him, its just gonna reimforce his whole "get used to it" mindset :/

[@iguessyeah8687]

i dont want to tell you what to do with your relationship because i barely know anything about it and its also none of my business, but if your boyfriend creates his own narratives about you instead of listening to you, it could be problematic in the long run

[@danic9304]

I spent a very long time trying to get used to it and trying to convince myself I was turned on etc with my ex, and it became the elephant in the room underlying our entire relationship. We had a brilliant friendship and I loved him dearly, but he needed this thing that everybody apparently needed and was considered to be an essential component of a healthy relationship. Thirteen years together - we eventually split up, though stayed friends. It is only in retrospect and with newer understanding of the Ace spectrum that I understand I wasn't broken / damaged, just wired differently. There are times I regret staying together as long as we did but am thankful there was enough affection remaining to rescue the friendship at the core of our relationship. It was a close call though and we both hurt each other. Unless you are with someone who understands and can accept little to no sex without feeling rejected, or you are able to enjoy it as a way of getting close - i think there's a good chance you will hurt each other by staying together. But that's just my take..

[@rae2blue]

I really recommend checking out AceDadAdvice’s “How to Negotiate Intimacy with an Allo when you are Asexual”. He/They do an excellent KZbin vid breaking down how to talk about s€xual and intimate aspects of a relationship between allo-ace individuals. You can maybe use some of those tips while you continue to explore your orientation (which both this channel and that one are great resources for). Whatever you do, I hope you remember that you and your experiences are just as important and valid as his. Your voice matters. If he’s not hearing you, I hope you can find the words to get through to him. But if he continues to not hear you, I hope you have a support network to lean on to help you manage a healthy way of navigating through. 💜

[@nacardelt8225]

I am 21 and after a few days of research I think I am greysexual, thanks for the video, it was super useful.

[@Kaffuyu]

I used to say I was on the ace spectrum but not being asexual 'cause graysexual is a not so well known term and I always had a hard time explaining what that means lol. I'm more confident now with what I identify with, I'm getting to know me! wow, after all it's all a journey. thx for the video ♡

[@earth2ellie]

That 'don't prioritize sex' point hit it home for me. Thanks for that, can now confirm that I am infact aspec.

[@fleurvnrcisse]

no cause seriously i really dont get why people prioritize THAT thing... do you not wanna know more about them? share stories? traumas? or something deeper? it didnt make sense to me

[@strawberrycellphone]

The explanation of the difference between libido and sexual attraction left me questioning my whole life lmao

[@arwenanduin]

When I was younger, it was 1) bad to be gay in middle school: one more thing to be teased about and 2) begrudgingly okay according to a slight minority in high school to be gay because many people at least pay lip service to being accepting. BUT THERE WERE STILL ONLY 2 CHOICES! 😣 How could I possibly know that I was a demisexual bi-romantic? How could anyone have known?! And most still wouldn't get it. So I gave up dating by the end of the 80s. Then lo, when I wasn't looking, new words emerged to validate my experience! Labels are bad when they limit you and put you in a box, and already I see younger folks balk at all these labels for that reason. But for people my age, a label CAN be liberating, just as long as you know labels must be sef-chosen.

[@meadowrae1491]

My orientation is so confusing to me. I've been calling myself demisexual for years, without realizing that, duh, that's part of the asexual spectrum.

[@Doomsword0]

...this sounds a lot like me actually. for me when I have that attraction it usually isn't very intense. and usually it's during that 'me time' and I'll have thoughts of, oh that person is attractive maybe I would like to do that sort of thing with a person, but then as soon as that 'me time' is finished I loose all interest. also that 'me time' is started not as feeling lots of attraction and needing to do something with it, which I gather is how most people do that, but for me it's more just this'll help relax me and the end of the night. Since learning I'm aromantic I've been questioning myself possibly being ace because of this and it's all very confusing, but I'm going to think about greysexual, thanks for the information Lynn! (also apologizes if that was too much detail I wanted to lay out my thought process, maybe someone else has had similar thoughts)

[@evarinagarmguardian113]

Thank you for sharing! I know it'll be helpful for others. It certainly was for me!

[@Shoot4AlarmFire]

I experience it similarly. I am also aro, too.

[@mauru23]

This is one of the first videos that helped me understand my sexual orientation! I referred to myself as demisexual in my early 20s, but recently have preferred the broader label of greyasexual. It’s not something I feel the need to throw out there, but it’s helped me to understand what kind of boundaries I need to set in my relationships. I can’t say for certain that I’ve ever experienced sexual attraction, but I don’t think it’s impossible, and that’s why I like the term greyasexual for me.

[@ghostttttttheghost]

hiii i knew I was ace for awhile now but now that I've been seeing your videos on "signs that you are demi and grey ace", I realized that I may fit into either part of the ace spectrum- I love your content and I relate a lot to your ace content!!!

[@Bucherviews]

Yeah, I have no idea - I fit the description, but I have felt sexual attraction only for a short period of time months ago, to my current partner. The fact that I can't 'get it back' is really confusing and frustrating for both of us. Like... come back :/

[@poppyseedmuffin4390]

Hey if you’re still confused about that there is also a term Lithosexual or also referred to as Akoisexual which refers to experiencing sexual attraction but then it going away after a bit. I identify as this and its also part of the acesexual spectrum too. Just know you are not broken or alone in this experience ♥️

[@enso8379]

So yeah I like only have a sexual thought a few times a year. And for me its what I imagine people that hear foreign voices experience. I'm like "What the heck is that thought doing here, did someone invade my brain? Because that clearly isn't me". Its actually really startling when it happens, kinda like a jump scare.

[@ZKatNS]

I took a am I asexual quiz and that how I found out what graysexual was

[@gemmascotland899]

Thank you! I've been really struggling recently with describing my sexuality to people on dating apps and this will hopefully make it easier 😊❤

[@Catherine-uu4lz]

This video is amazing for making greysexuality clearer to my questioning mind, thank you!

[@Diablochild123]

Thank you for making this video. I’ve never prioritized sex in a relationship but now I’m questioning if I’m Greysexual. Like it would make sense that sex sells for a lot of people but it’s not a priority when it comes to me. Sometimes I mix sexual attraction with just being attracted to their personality. I like physical affection, but sexual affection isn’t something I think about the most.

[@MattyParker]

Well all five of these signs align with how I feel, so that's interesting

[@alexmundy3034]

I used to think I was gay, but sometimes the idea of sex gross. Sometimes it’s the opposite. I think this might be me… thank you so much for this!!!!

[@ryansenft3315]

This really makes me think. I really identified with these 5 signs, but the signs of being demisexual also describe me well. Dunno how to go about putting that together and understanding what it means.

[@amadwolf9758]

… I’m questioning eveything at the moment, thought if I’d finally found a label but no I’m starting to think between pansexual and greysexual And I’ve given up on my gender

[@Kermit_Da_frog916]

SAME

[@lynnsaga1397]

I hope the video helped a little bit!

[@tdblackboxx6866]

Whatever you discover about yourself, you are enough. Should your understanding change in the future, you will still be enough. Happy hunting!

[@amadwolf9758]

@Lynn Saga, it really did, but I’m still not entirely sure, since I do feel attraction quite often, but not for long periods

[@amadwolf9758]

@Hannah Currie yes

[@seafridge]

Yay! Thanks so much for this. Love you diving into the ace spec umbrella more. 💜

[@toasty973]

so for me, I consider myself gray-ace because I feel this, like, kink-oriented sexual attraction. I for sure relate to "not being ace or allo" because of my kinks. I know there are some ace people out there who feel no arousal towards their kink, and no sexual attraction towards their partner, but for me that's not the case and it can sometimes make me feel alienated from both asexuality and allosexuality. Kinky aces, unite!

[@obosuck]

> Kinky aces, unite! Woo go us! I just describe it as going to Ben and Jerry's, lots of ice cream no vanilla.

[@hoeforcheese]

You explain things so beautifully and confirm everything that MIGHT be confusing. Thank you for this :)

[@au1k]

Thanks for your content!! I think understanding the difference between libido and attraction was the most difficult part to find myself in the ace spectrum. I always felt a strong attraction to my previous partners, but also had some ONS (felt very miserable after, though). But now I understand I can have my libido higher from time to time, not necessarily being sexually attracted to someone. You helped me a lot in that process :)

[@mikaelasward674]

I've started to picture myself as a panda, wearing a pan shirt, spreading ace-coloured confetti everywhere because it can land in so many ways, and I don't really know where I'm at... probably somewhere under the ace umbrella. Maybe I'm greysexual, it makes sense. Thank you for a great video!

[@Katzaca]

tysm for making this!! I've been needing to find more greyace content lately and this was so validating :')

[@EmilyIlett]

Omg this video is great! I can definitely relate to this but I still feel romantic and aesthetic attraction and it gets confusing haha

[@acedegen]

Thank you, this was so helpful 😭 Ive been questioning what my deal was because i was wondering if im demi or gray. I definitely think im gray lol

[@vlacple]

I think im grey aswell 🤔

[@eclipseandgang]

Hm yes, hello ladies, gents and non-binary people, I am attracted to the colour *grey* All jokes aside, great video like always! :D

[@Jimmenson_]

Point number four has just blown my mind... Thank you for this. I have had that happen numerous times when I've mistaken my aesthetic/plutonic attraction for someone for something else. I'm very early in learning about this, but greysexuality is starting to resonate with me more and more.

[@GypsyxDarling]

Oh yeah okay Thank you, this was really helpful!

[@user-lm1np7hm5k]

This was nice for understanding others better, ty :)

[@Vesta_the_Lesser]

Thank you for explaining the difference between libido and attraction!

[@Kermit_Da_frog916]

Lynn, you are a mindreader! I was just questioning if I was grey ace,

[@lynnsaga1397]

I do the best I can😅

[@alexia_c_]

thank you so much. i finally found a label that suits me. im officially bi/grey

[@tdelgado01]

Thank you very much, this is a very informational video that has helped me to understand myself!

[@mysryuza]

Totally not me watching this as a reference for Greyromantic 😂 I still get plenty of crushes, but they’re based on emotional attachment and sexual attraction and separating love from obsession (which usually occurs for me in crushes) made me realize how little I understood about feeling romantic attraction.

[@sunshinelavender5889]

Hi Lynn! I identify as basically as far to the end of the acesexual spectrum, without saying full ace. Mainly since I have had s*xual attraction in the past, but have not in years. So grateful for acesexuality to get more recognition and thanks so much for doing this video 💜🖤🤍

[@sunny.d1343]

Love your laptop background :)

[@badgerfern6469]

This really helped me validate what I’ve suspected along with conversations with my allo friends XD

[@terka4310]

you're so sweet and nice, you made me so safe throughout the entire video....thank you for the clarification, now I know I'm grey!

[@dallychacus243]

Thank you so much for the information it has helped me alot with me understanding myself

[@pazzieanneknexx809]

I once saw someone describe a conflict of libido and asexuality as being, with high libido, "Horny in no particular direction".

[@micronerd]

This sounds, like, really relatable to me. Drive =/= attraction. It's like being hungry, but not liking any food, so in the end you starve.

[@BaninDiarSukmono]

Love your desktop, Jiro!!

[@cami1700]

I've been questioning where I would be in the ace spectrum since I do experience sexual attraction but it's very rare, and has nothing to do with my libido. Grayace seems very fitting. Also, Aromantic (Aegoromantic) here.

[@graylev4731]

Tysm

[@Mothman.Incarnate]

I greatly appreciate this explanation because I've identified as Grey/demi Ace for a while and now knowing is very comforting

[@axelgobuzzzz]

Ive questioned a couple times wether i was ace or not before but ive always kinda been like “idk, i dont think so” and moved on so thank you for helping me realize im greysexual 💛💛💛

[@datguy6745]

Not to make this seem weird, you just "explained" something to me. You express some "Real" type of beauty to me. It seems you just cherrish who you are and it really shows in your eyes, smile, gestures, etc. Something that humanity seems to lack thinking about this :D

[@OGB6_]

Thanks this was very helpful

[@AvaFayIliza]

I have never known myself better than after watching this and your "5 signs you're demisexual" video. I knew the terms before, but never so clearly defined. I now realize I'm not demi, as I previously thought, but in fact gray. I genuinely didn't know that others could actually tell the difference between different attractions, because they're all the same to me. I'm pretty sure I feel them all, they're just all the same level of emotional involvement. Thank you so much! 💖 -Ava

[@maxsherritt8242]

Thank you. This helped.

[@viviennerhea]

Wow yes you helped a lot!

[@kJ-lh4rb]

ty for this video

[@liamodonovan6610]

Always love your videos lynn you are someone i would love to meet one day you are a person I really look up too very intelligent video and informative love you lynn everyone is always valid thank you Lynn

[@lynnsaga1397]

Awwww thank you as always! I really look forward to your comments ☺️

[@liamodonovan6610]

@@lynnsaga1397 a part of me misses you

[@fluttershyzxy1512]

Thank you so much for this. Im greysexual and heteroromantic and for a while I thought I was just partly asexual and partly heterosexual and was so confused but after watching this it made me feel so happy to relate so much to the greysexual label

[@doethundermelon]

Figuring out I'm grey/demisexual put a lot of things into perspective for me. Especially the point about the attraction you feel being very weak. Hearing people talk about the intense attraction they felt just had me thinking they were all exaggerating because it isn't that crazy of a feeling and how the hell was I supposed to know that they all literally felt like three times the attraction that I did xD

[@magicmagic4864]

Honestly this video helps a lot, I am like: I definitely would call myself ace but I'm neither really aleo

[@bendysans1473]

Thank you Now i understand i have a lot of libido and not a lot of sexual attraction I understand now

[@theexplorer1084]

Thank you so much seriously.

[@heyemoboy_16]

i first thought i was orchidsexual but now i think i might be greysexual! thank you this was helpful! btw is it okay if i refer you as they/them?

[@mintythedemon1785]

2, 3 and 4 describe me. But I know I feel romantic attraction a lot. How I feel about intercourse can vary.

[@WonkyClownRibs]

omg, yes this is so me, i didn’t think it was before because my libido is so high ( second puberty yay ) but i don’t feel attracted towards anyone…maybe some people but i’m not sure. ( so i’m not sure if i’m greysexual but it’s the closest i’ve found )

[@PlasmaMongoose]

TIL that there is a term for my extremely limited interest in being sexual, I previously thought that I just rarely met anyone that I can be turned on by, even as a teenager, I just wasn't interested in chasing girls and knew I didn't swing the other way either, it is nice to know there are others like me in that respects.

[@nathanbreadboi9223]

Dear god thank you I am so confused with my sexuality

[@lynnsaga1397]

I hope it helps!

[@nathanbreadboi9223]

@@lynnsaga1397 it did, thank you so much :D

[@Stargazer_Ley]

Not greysexual but if I transpose these for the aro spectrum....I may be gray aro. lol. Found myself going not for sexual attraction but with my romantic yeah.... -_-

[@lynnsaga1397]

They could definitely apply to being grey aro for sure! I might have my sibling make a video on grey aro if other folks are interested in it!

[@sonderdazealt]

@@lynnsaga1397 I'm not grey aro (I'm aroflux) but please do!! it's a very unknown orientation that has a lot of misconceptions and not enough representation 🙁

[@anvithequarsonist]

I’m aroflux too!! Yeah a video on that would be really cool

[@thepianoplayerkid4726]

What if people who are confused on their sexually start to write comments on the kind of people they are attracted to or what gender they feel they are most likely could be and people who find the comment give their opinion on what they think the people COULD be. Or at least give the person a better idea on what their sexually is.

[@malenyusay3892]

Please make a video about greyromanticism/grayromanticism.

[@INGIE32]

Is that It Takes Two on your desktop o_O. Very good game that is.

[@MysticMylesZ]

5:25 yeeeeeeah still a biy confused on those; there's so much of em & they definitely feel different cause I can differentiate between how I felt in certain moments But what word fits what... idk. There's aesthetic attraction, sexual attraction, arousal, libido... might be more I'm missing

[@korok_05]

Lynn, i have a video recommendation :) you don't have to do this, but in a future video, could you go over quoiromantic? i recently discovered the term and find it really interesting. also, i really look up to you and think you're really inspiring!

[@lynnsaga1397]

I think I’ve hear of it before but it was awhile ago but I’ll look into it for sure!

[@korok_05]

@@lynnsaga1397 ahh thank you!

[@anvithequarsonist]

ayy, i'm quoiro :D It'd be really cool if they did!

[@korok_05]

@@anvithequarsonist i think i might be as well, and i agree!

[@obosuck]

I thought I was demisexual for a while but it didn't really fit since I do sometimes feel sexual attraction without being friends first. But really the only one I think was missed in the video is the kinky graysexual where they only have kinks and aren't attracted to bodies.

[@issa_estrella]

I always get confused with sensual attraction and sexual attraction bc yes I love cuddling holding hands kissing but when it comes to sex I’m just so blan about it like I don’t really care

[@issa_estrella]

For my I don’t understand the need for sex like yeah it’s nice but is it really a need I always get confused with that part of me like I would have it but like I don’t need to I’ve always just felt so nonchalant about it

[@virginiacastiglione8879]

pay attention to whether s3xual attraction is tied to specific contexts (like quink) and you engineer your s3x life so it recreates these contexts all the time and you end up "passing" as allo.

[@obnoxiouspurring]

thank you

[@0roseable]

I've been wondering if I'm one the asexual spectrum. And this helped a lot - I'm definitely not completely ace. And it's taken me until 42 to start to wonder if I'm one the ace spectrum because I definitely feel romantic attraction, and didn't realise that the attraction I feel might just be romantic and not sexual. But grey/demi fits well for me I think. There isn't nothing, but I think it tends much more to be romantic attraction. And this label might be something I can take on without feeling like I'm being dramatic by calling myself ace.

[@mackenziediaz8780]

3:30 seems to describe ace spike which is a microlabel :>

[@newyorknewyork196]

Thank you!!!

[@jaanaberg6125]

I was talking to my dad, and for context when I first mentioned I was ace I literally had to convince him that asexuality was a thing in the first place so that's who I was talking to. I was trying to explain the difference between libido and attraction (very simple difference right?) and his response was "I feel like you're overthinking it". I mean he's respectful and all but also so fundementally not understanding that some people aren't capable of feeling these things. So yea xd

[@noalgreene8762]

Thank you so so so much

[@ladyscribbles6134]

Oh sh*t, I think I might be greysexual. Anyway, thanks for the video! It was pretty educational and helpful, as well as really good at explaining each point

[@Neveronline2024]

I recently became biromantic instead of bisexual, because I’ve been thinking that I’m ace. However, my libido is almost non existent but I do occasionally feel sexual feelings, it’s really hard to feel these feelings though. I’d struggle with feeling sexual attraction and sometimes I’d even force myself or fake my sexual attraction. Nothing. I would think there is something wrong with me for the longest time. I would almost never think of sex and sometimes I get grossed out by it.

[@DAN13L_]

idk what i am cause when i 'feel' that way i dont like how it feels is that just libido or what, i could never picture myself doing that with another person in any way at all tbh it makes me feel gross thinking about it but i still get the feeling sometimes and i always thought ace people cannot feel that way at all thats why im so hesitant to label myself as fully ace and wondering if i might be grey-ace instead

[@judelee9156]

I am still pretty comfortable under this label. It's hard to feel comfortable with a very fluid sexuality when others can be so consistent. This video gave me conformation bias, hell of a drug yall ❤

[@YBCause]

As a woman I’ve been confusing « wanting to have sex with a guy » with « wanting to build a romantic connection ». So I agreed to have sex most of the time because I thought it was mandatory. Now I’m in love with a woman who doesn’t want to have sex often and its feels GREAT. We have sex sometimes but most of the time we’re just cuddling and kissing and I love it 🥰 And sex isn’t something I consider mandatory anymore, it’s just a cool casual activity we do every now and then.

[@CryoCoffinVampire]

AAAAAAAHH!!! I didn’t know if I’m greysexual, or just paranoid about a stable romantic relationship, not getting pregnant, and STDs!!!

[@nightsintheasylum2340]

I'm really struggling at the moment with my life and wanting a partner but being greysexual as well as disabled physically (pus being mental lol ptsd/bpd/add ect) and I really struggle with sex,don't enjoy it but could put up with it for the sake of having kids one day which I really hope to be blessed with one day. Any time I start speaking to someone I tell them from the get go that my sex drive is super low and affected by ptsd, but even on the rare occasion a potential partner is willing to 'put up with' my chronic pain And lack of physical capabilities,they all eventually want sex and then leave when they don't get it. I really want kids and a life partner, but I'm 27 and fear my clock is running out and I'm scared il never find someone to love me even though I don't think I'm thay hard to ith and always put the other person's needs before my own. Any advice please? Thankyou for your video and thankyou for tips in advance x

[@youngmoney1346]

So i am greysexual Thanks for the info

[@missuwu5830]

Thank you

[@telmesomethinidk]

lmao im demi/grey sexual. hahhah it just is idk. ive tried everything and nothing beats whats laid out for me 🤷🏻‍♀️

[@Andreas-gh6is]

I feel like the grey- and demi- labels may "just" be about confusing things for sexual attraction that really aren't. And it's damn hard to tell all those things apart. I mean.... I want to cuddle that cute girl... is that sexual, romantic, aesthetic or platonic? I know that cuddling can be platonic and it can turn into something sexual. And so on. But I've talked with way to few grey/demi people so I can't say for sure.

[@Cherrycreamsoda1]

Hey Lynn, correct me if I'm wrong but I believe demisexuality falls under the grey-ace umbrella too right? (ie being in the grey area between asexuality and allosexuality) if so would that make me grey-ace? I consider myself demi but I think I may have experienced very weak attraction to some people I didn't particularly know well, or even like that much 😅 but it was hard to tell whether that was what I was feeling. I also hear a lot of demisexuals say that once they are attracted to someone it's like a switch flips and their attraction (and libido) suddenly goes from 0 to 9 or 10. Have you ever experienced this as a demisexual? I'm not sure I really relate to this way of feeling attraction. The one time it happened was more like my level of attraction gradually increased until I felt okay to "do things" with said person, so to speak. I'm not sure if this is something you relate to at all or if anyone else does. Be interesting to hear your thoughts. Thanks as always for your content ☺

[@rae2blue]

Hi Cherry, to your question about if demisexuality falls under the grey-ace umbrella: yes and no. Grey-ace is both an umbrella term (and when used as such *would* include demisexuals and other micro-labels) and a stand-alone term (it’s own micro-label). Some people prefer the distinction and others prefer the umbrella term. Neither is right or wrong, and both can be true at the same time. I hope that clarified and didn’t further confuse. 😅 In regards to understanding your experience, everyone experiences asexuality somewhat uniquely. There are shared experiences, but if your attraction is a slow burn, that’s completely valid! My attraction is very much a flux, which is why I prefer to just keep it broad at gray-ace, even though I know a deep connection *tends* to help it form. Again, it’s all about how *you* prefer to define your experience. I hope this helped!

[@annaoffive]

I really appreciate this cause I’ve been looking up both demi and greysexuality, and tbh I’m not entirely sure which one I fall under because there are moments where I feel like I have an attraction to someone (mostly celeb crushes) but I’m not 100% sure what kind of attraction it is. I also know that I do need an emotional bond/connection, so