A HOUR of TRYING to CLEAN my CLUTTERED home, OVERWHELMING

I'm trying to get my house back from THE WORST I have had it on KZbin. I am interrupted by life constantly so it takes me over three days to try to get it under control. I get so close to the end and am hit by a terrible rug pull...... You'll see me try to overcome adhd decision paralysis, start and stop in zones, and finally find the ability to focus and get it done. #cleaningmotivation #cleanwithme

[@lynnturney9773]

You are doing way too much, you are going to burn yourself out! Your kids are all old enough to help you, and to clean their own rooms. I’m so sorry your husband is having serious health problems. All the more reason for your kids to start immediately helping you out. You can’t be expected to do everything by yourself. Really you husband will most likely need you to in the near future. Therefore the kids need to start helping you around the house. Assign chores to each one of them, and have them clean their own rooms.

[@jenniferwilliams7086]

Yesss

[@jenniferannfox2316]

I was thinking the same thing. If kids don’t have routine habits assigned they don’t learn responsibility later

[@tjall]

I'm sure she said 2 of her children are autistic so don't think they can

[@mallymakings2853]

@@tjallI completely disagree with this comment. My son has Autism and everything else that goes with it. In my experience with my son and the autistic children he’s with, doing some chores is an absolute must. It gives them responsibility and it add’s benefit to their routine. For example, every time my son eats, he is responsible for taking his plate and cutlery to the dishwasher. If there’s food then he is responsible for putting that into the bin. Every Saturday, (he has it on his calendar)that he needs to strip his bedding and pick everything up off the floor and then vacuum. It’s all about trial and error. Children both with and without autism learn that “calm” in the household comes from everyone doing something to contribute.

[@mutigeart3024]

​​@@mallymakings2853 вы правы абсолютно 👍. Я, моя жена и дети тоже аутисты. Я с женой ходим на работу, дети в школу , но каждый вечер наша кухня чистая, у нас маленькая 45 см посудомоечная машина и каждый вечер мы включаем ее. Чистота дело привычки, привычки очень важны для аутистов, это успокаивает ,ежедневная рутина, каждый знает что делать и где какая вещь лежит, где ее место и никогда не надо искать ❤

[@Chrissyhappy]

I watch a man called Midwest magic. He is fantastic explaining things. He has autism and explains how his brain works. He explains the best way to clean. He cleans professionally too. I watch him for motivation and help. Good luck to everyone on their journey.😊

[@jennifermonk4275]

I love that channel because 1- He’s hilarious and 2-He’s kind and doesn’t judge people’s circumstances. My house is a mess as I just went through a very personal grieving process recently and I felt paralyzed in my grief. I am getting back at it today but I felt myself getting emotional and needed to sit for a moment. Sometimes we only have the energy we have at the time. Cleaning as you go and having kids help are all great in theory but sometimes life gets in the way of even the best of intentions. Be gentle with yourself. It will be clean again and then messy again. It’s life and this is completely normal.

[@paulabrown6840]

I’m coming from a caring place here. I recommend a family meeting. Your kids are old enough to take some of the responsibility in keeping an uncluttered house. Maybe new rules about clothes shoes and putting dishes away. You could give them each aage appropriate list of chores and create a reward system for accomplishments. Otherwise Beth it’s like you’re digging a hole in the sand that just keeps falling back in the hole. You deserve help and the kids will learn at the same time. You deserve joy! 🌷💛

[@feraltradwife]

I love that idea! I am working on transitioning the responsibilities but not really enforcing it. I think I feel like it’s hypocritical for me to nag them on mess when I’m also wildly messy. I do think it’s time for me to buckle down and get them to pull their own. Thank you so much Paula ❤️❤️

[@MillennialMeg]

@@feraltradwifethis is what holds me back too. I literally told my 12 year old this exact thing a couple of weeks ago. How can I ask them to be disciplined when I still struggle? But we have to.

[@tamsheyclark6531]

Tell them you are struggling with being messy too and maybe they will offer to help. 🙏🏻♥️🤗

[@lauramitchell6725]

@@feraltradwifeTell them that you’re struggling and NEED their help!

[@elckefahwehinmi1466]

Thus is not normal Your childeren dont help

[@belb5091]

Omg you remind me so much me. I feel exactly how you feel. I feel so burnt out. But i try not to give up. My house looks just like yours and i get no help. I am here for you. Thank you for sharing and making me feel like I'm not the only one going through.❤

[@feraltradwife]

You are so welcome here! I’m here for you too babe! I really feel like little by little we can improve, and it’s not the worst thing that we have messy homes!

[@helloworld441]

I have some tips for keeping the house somewhat tidy; 1. Everything should have a home and everyone should know where things belong 2. Never cook in a messy kitchen and clean as you cook 3. To help motivate the kids, make cleaning a group activity- music playing, set a timer to race against. 4. really build up the sense of ownership of the house and accomplishment when cleaning ie. This is OUR home, we are so lucky to have it. Encourage them to style the cushins/decor etc.. Hope this is helpful

[@nikio3650]

I love these ideas!

[@sherrybendall5817]

One time I enlisted my daughter and husband for a 15 minute cleaning session. They could pick kitchen, bathroom or living room. We all worked for 15 minutes and it made a Hugh difference. I also used to have everyone clean during commercials of whatever show we were watching. You would be surprised at how much can be accomplished in just a few minutes at a time. And, the kids didn’t complain so much.

[@AliceLynnBeautyandMore]

Hello, I am new here. But wow, you are way too hard on yourself! You can't be expected to keep your home spotless at all times. Your children are definitely old enough to help you around the house. You should make a chore list and have them all do things around the house as well. Such as folding laundry and putting it away. Sweeping and vacuuming, loading and unloading the dishwasher. So many other things! My children did chores growing up and I rewarded them every week with an allowance. They really enjoyed the reward, they would save it up and I would take them to shop at their favorite store. I am truly sorry to hear about your husband, it sounds like he will be needing you even more down the road, so your children should definitely be helping more around the house. Speaking of, I heard you say the front of your house was many shoes, I would have your children go through all of the shoes, get rid of the ones they no longer wear or no longer fit into etc.... My heart really hurt listening to you! Please stop being so hard on yourself, you are only one person with way to much on your plate. It is time for your children to help out as it is their home too! God Bless You All! Much love and Prayers 🙏❤

[@christinem3972]

I agree too hard on herself. She talks about her partner getting mad for her asking for help. How does she have time to put videos?

[@alexisrush91]

i love how your dog just stays where you put him when you move him from cushion to pillow to puppy bed lol

[@feraltradwife]

lol, right? Just happy to be a couch pup!

[@susiesjourneytofreedom6058]

Thank you for this realistic video. You have got this. We are in this same transition of getting our home decluttered and children completing chores.

[@leem200]

It is not as bad as it looks. It is putting garbage in can, and dishes put in sink, and clothes taken care of as you go. The problem I see is not cleaning as you go. Which is nothing but a bad habit. Do dishes as you use them. Had a family of 8 in 900 square feet. Never had that because we cleaned and picked up after ourselves from a small age on. No dish washier, no dryer. You do it as you go. When you cook wash dishes as you go. Put all dishes you eat from or drink from in empty dish washier. NO large bowls or pans, wash them in sink. Dry put a way. Children need to help, have a clean and pick up twice a day, morning, and evening. Kids can rinse dishes place in dish washier, like glasses. no drink unless you put can in trash. Assign everyone a cup and they can rinse it and reuse it during the day. Have kids put away things as they go. You'd be surprised how it doesn't get bad with good habits. Stop letting it get that way to begin with no reason for it. Grandmother had 13 kids in a small three bedroom. Everyone cleans and helps. Beds made daily; clothes taken care of. Everyone is responsible for dishes they use.

[@angelaweathersbee1334]

Everyone should help clean after meals, and set a timer to straighten the common areas every night before bed. The mess may sometimes get out of control, but hey, it gives you You Tube content. 😂

[@michellelithgow7881]

Part of parenting is teaching children to do regular chores to be a helpful responsible cleaning part of the family. Also, decluttering may help you all too . Wishing you better help & better times and some ...happiness, sometime.

[@MrsJilly]

Hi 😊 Could you go around the house and just collect the trash everyday? And then go back to doing a 10min tidy in each room everyday? I genuinely come from a place of wanting to help 🫶 I’m a perfectionist and I had to overcome the high standards I would set to myself and change my mindset to, it’s good enough. My perfectionism would stop me from even beginning the task. You are doing amazing! Try not to be so hard on yourself ♥️

[@feraltradwife]

You know what, I’m going to do that this morning. I’ll do the trash in the morning and a tidy in each room once an hour. Meaning pick a room for that hour and do the 10. I bet I’ll feel much better at the end of the day. And I know you’re coming form a good place my dear, I’m happy to see you again!!

[@MrsJilly]

@@feraltradwifeHopefully won’t be as long next time 😊sending love to you and your family ❤

[@MrsSpur]

I relate so much to this! It either stops me from doing it, or I hyper focus on one room and take hours to clean it, and never get everything done.

[@lisasymonds6732]

You would probably find it easier to tidy one area in the house at a time. Only move on to another area when its finished. You are doing lots of cleaning and tiding but because no area is complete, it looks like you haven't done much. Once you see an area completely done, it will give you the motivation to finish another area.

[@feraltradwife]

Thanks for the tips!

[@BBG2911]

Let me preface by saying, you are putting in the effort to clean your home. You're doing great! My only thought is you don't finish cleaning an area completely. You get side tracked, and move to another area. You were making progress in the living room, and moved to the patio. I'm not an expert, but if you can see an area completely clean, maybe it will give you motivation to move to another room. Idk, thats my two cents.

[@satisfiedsoul6921]

And I don't know if you were doing this for the purpose of content creation interest or not, but why were you wasting time with two different vacuums and a broom in the laundry room? You could have swept that space in 1/3rd of the time. And you could have moved and swept behind the rolling cart. It was frustrating for me to watch.

[@michellebooker2994]

Please don't hate your life, you are doing a great job....

[@knotjusthooked]

I also have to agree with some of the comments about the kids helping out. The ones I've seen coming and going in this video are more than old enough to help clean up the mess that they helped create. Each one should be responsible for and held accountable for at least one chore in the main part of the house as well as keeping their own room clean. I come from a different generation, and I realize that, but I had two siblings besides myself, and we did everything to help out our mother from cleaning our rooms, changing sheets weekly, doing laundry, cleaning the bathroom that we all used, cutting the grass (and we didn't get paid to do it) the list goes on. We could not expect our mother to work a full-time job and keep a clean house with three capable children. We didn't always like it, but we also felt a sense of pride and accomplishment when it was done. I also realize this is a content video, but maybe include some content of them helping out around the house. I'm not saying hours of them cleaning, but maybe them taking out the garbage or 20 minutes of them doing the dishes. You look exhausted and overwhelmed. Having them help clean up might also have them thinking twice about not putting things away or cleaning up the mess when their done with something.

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you for your thoughtful reply. I am allowing my children have final say on if and when they are in a KZbin video. The shots of them walking in and out are shown to them prior to posting and they can approve or not. Often the twins do not want to be shown. So they do have chores and they do help out, but not on KZbin. ❤️

[@zuzanakrajnakova8853]

You are not the problem, your family is.

[@susanf4857]

Rule # 1 - if you take something out, put it away when you are done

[@cbhere]

WHos the MOM, whos trains the Kids to clean or NOT clean...??? whos the BOSS??? ...... yes she is also the problem...

[@paulabrown6840]

We teach people how to treat us.

[@cleanwithmimi]

I am so looking forward to seeing the before and after of this! Trust me, my home gets out of control at times too. Don't be embarrassed! This is the best kind of content... the after is always so amazing! Your face when you took a sniff in that bottle 😭😭🤣🤣. I know how you felt! Love your videos! Have an amazing weekend! ❤❤❤

[@feraltradwife]

Oh man. Brace yourself. The ending is not great. :/

[@maryrizzo9127]

OMG! I’m not even half way through your video. And your thoughts are so comforting. Just plain normal. I can’t explain how you make me feel. We can’t be perfect. Keep striving.❤

[@lauriekapalka9859]

I decided to watch your video because I can no longer clean and I really miss doing it. I guess it’s not always fun when it’s too much. Now I remember being overwhelmed after watching you work so hard. You did an amazing job. Thank you for sharing

[@michaelletrottier6018]

I love the way you respond to the meanies. 😂 It made me keep reading the comments! I am inspired and want to go clean something. I struggle with certain rooms, my kitchen and living area I am super focused on, but my basement and bedrooms need attention! I keep procrastinating on decluttering those areas. It’s hard to keep up and you have a lot on your plate. Cut yourself some slack! I enjoyed your content.

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you :) I usually has a designated room that is my hoarder room and I throw everything in there and it becomes horrifying. I don’t have that here so much because we don’t have a guest room. But I haven’t been upstairs in a while and I’m guessing it’s pretty bad 😫 it’s so easy to just keep procrastinating and not going up there!!! But eventually I’ll get a wild hair and attack it, and hopefully you will too!

[@karamalone1169]

I’m here to reassure that what you are showing is REAL and RAW! Most content creators DO NOT show that! With that being said congratulations for keeping it real! As a momma of 7 kiddos I assure you our house gets out of wack a lot also! No matter how much I clean! I feel like I go through cycles! I’ll be so on top of the house for so long that I feel like I burn myself out then there is a period I “slack” then get overwhelmed and have to start all over again! It’s amazingly comforting when mommas share REAL overwhelming situations! I feel “Not alone”! And not so much like a failure, because the truth is, we are just busy moms and can’t do it all perfectly all the time! I subscribed! Enjoyed your content! Thank you! ❤

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you so much!! 7 kiddos has to be crazy and amazing. I’m trying to baby trap my husband into another handful of kids but he’s wildly resistant. 😂🤣

[@sharonmumi]

It's hard when its mainly one person doing the cleaning and in your case 5 people doing the uncleaning, in my case its 4, it's hard even when the others help out some, its still difficult to keep ahead unless you're a robot and cleaning like you having nothing else to do and then have a breakdown from nervous exhaustion , don't be so hard on yourself Beth, from what I can see you're kicking it most of the time, if all else fails treat yourself to a whole house top to bottom clean from a cleaning company while you go get a pedicure, not too often 3-4 times a year is probably safe to get away with 🤪Really enjoyed this clean!

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you Sharon!!! I realized after watching it back I was so so negative. But I think it’s just the extra issues in our lives pulling me down a bit.

[@sharonmumi]

@@feraltradwife I'm the queen of negative, I've fallen out this week with my sister, nothing major, both at fault but both stubborn so that's going to be fun , I'm not backing down this time ( bet I do!) my husband is just annoying most of the time, and our oldest son seems to be parroting him lately, youngest son is my darling and can do no wrong, it's all their fault anyway, perimenopause and GAD has nothing to do with it....... er what was I saying?!?

[@feraltradwife]

@@sharonmumi right?! When it rains it pours!!!

[@TheTidyNest]

'uncleaning' is my new favorite term 😂 my kids and hubby do help a ton with housework, but with a family of 9 it only takes one day of being off our game to completely trash the house. It's so frustrating to work so hard and have it all basically crapped on immediately 😅

[@shinetta87]

Thank you so much for posting this content! This video came into my feed the same day I looked around at my own house and immediately felt overwhelmed and ready to give up. You’ve given me hope ❤

[@feraltradwife]

We can do this!!! I’m glad I helped in any small way. ❤️

[@younglady3141]

These comments. It's easy to talk about what should do. We are only getting a piece of what someones life looks like. Remember that. Be kind. Take it a step at a time. You can only do so much. As long as you do your best thats all that matters. I hope your husband is feeling better. It would be great if you had help. I wish you and your family the best. Enjoy your time with your family. Love the content. You look great by the way.

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you! 😊

[@thesimplelife7934]

Chores are good for children. Not to mention, you want them to know how to take care of themselves someday right? I have 4 boys and one is DD to the point he will probably live at home forever, but even he has chores. My husband doesn’t do much as he is the bread winner although if I ask of course he helps, but everything I do is a lot so having the kids pick up, keep tidy rooms, do chores helps SO much! Give it a try. Your kids will surprise you ❤ Love this video. While my home is tidy, I enjoy watching REAL cleaning. Remember you can’t pour from an empty cup.

[@drabsparrow]

I had a tidy home for a long time, and when I started getting overwhelmed with life, personal, jobs, marriage, financial, my house started to look like this all the time, I would clean it if I had the energy or was just so over it looking destroyed that I had to do something and I would turn around and it was like this again. I was in a deep depression for around 17 months; and I finally got the help I needed and taking care of my home, my job, my kids, and my marriage doesn't feel so overwhelming. My house is not always perfect now, it still gets crazy, but I don't feel like I'm drowning. A home is a blessing, but it should feel that way too. I feel your overwhelm and your stress in this video. hugs mama, you're doing what you can, but nobody can do it all alone.

[@alisonm2257]

Oh yes. Get the kids involved. From the age of 9, i had routine chores. My mom wasnt a Nazi or anything, but I was expected to put everything back in its place. If I left my shoes or book bag in the living room, she would tell me to get it. My mom cooked, and we (kids) did the dishes.

[@cassieborg3075]

I have 2 ADHD / ASD kids and get overwhelmed with my cleaning too... and my house is tiny in comparison to yours! My kids do simple chores and it helps SO much. Eg. Rise dishes after eating and put straight into diahwasher, pick up ALL shoes around the house and put in 1 cupboard, pick up ALL dirty clothes from around the entire house and put in laundry basket etc. Nothing too hard - but i tell you, it makes life SO much easier! I wish you luck finding a solution within your family to help your day to day cleaning routine. ❤

[@sharonchandler6245]

This is my first time on here. I appreciate your honesty and your sense of humor. My family knows that coffee is essential for a peaceful home I don’t function well without it. 😂😂. You need to pace yourself. Do one small section at a time. My daughter is ADHD and that is how I taught her to clean. You will get there in time.

[@naturl2012]

New subbie here! Wow! I have really found a cleaning channel. Thanks for sharing. 👍🏾

[@feraltradwife]

Awesome! Thank you!😊

[@Doris86pl]

When I have situation like yours today I follow the visibility rule and start with most visible spaces, it's tempting to declutter pantry or closet, but when I follow that temptation I have clean space but hidden, still when I will enter the room it will feel like nothing was done. As you I start load of loundry. Than I proceed with trash, it's quick and no decision is needed. After that stuff that has spot somewhere in the house. These two steps make huge difference. Than dishes and flat surfaces. When I have time I do quick vacuuming. Thank you for inspiration.

[@lulubellecataloni5605]

I just found your channel- you sound really overwhelmed. Setting up a cleaning schedule and involving your kids in simple tasks like breaking down cardboard boxes might be helpful. The kids are capable of folding their own clothes and putting them away. One of my chores when I lived with my family was folding everyone’s laundry and putting it away, if your kids helped you out with that, it would take so much burden off of you. You also beat yourself up alot in this video- I felt like saying hey sis! Stop- you are doing GREAT!

[@user-pn6uk1ki9q]

First time viewer. I’m noticing that with each task you successfully complete, you say “I’m lazy, that was disgusting, I should have…, etc.”. You accomplished so much…give yourself the credit you so deserve.

[@feraltradwife]

I’ll pay more attention to that! Thank you. I will say that I’m usually way more upbeat and positive. I recorded my voiceover the night after being in the hospital with my husband and the negativity really pulled through.

[@aliciataylor4820]

You did an amazing job don’t forget that. I hope your husband is doing better!❤

[@feraltradwife]

Hey babe! How are you? He is feeling a bit better, and we have follow ups with nephrologist, cardio, and neuro in the coming weeks. Fingers crossed for answers

[@terrybryson6864]

It is great to homeschool, but life skills are a thing to teach too. You are right that you never have them gone, to catch up. You are not lazy. You work hard. You have many animals to care for. Kids can have pet care assignments. When you finally get the kitchen clean..instead of cooking..say hey..this is a burger and fries take out night with paper plates. Give yourself breaks. If your husband burns food, then he can clean it. You need help. I just found you, but I’m worried about you. Tell the kids o food deliveries to the couch unless all bowls, etc. are brought over, rinsed, and all random paper on floor is thrown away. They can cut apples and peppers up. They can fold a load of clothing once a day. You are a precious mom. Take care.

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you xoxo

[@_.ivxyq0]

If you cook, then everyone else should be cleaning up afterward. Your kids are big enough to clean the kitchen, load the dishwasher, empty the dishwasher. Absolutely. And they need to. They need to. Growing up my job every night was to make the salad, make the tea and set the table. And after dinner, my job was to load the dishwasher. And I’m talking 10, 11, 12 years old. I also cleaned the bathroom upstairs and vacuumed the upstairs. I did not have to do yardwork! That was my brother’s job. (And please forgive my little KZbin avatar. I share an iPad account with my 13 year old niece and I’m pretty sure this is hers. I don’t know how to switch accounts!)

[@lorriemangum6734]

I keep hot dish water the sink. Put silverware to soak. Put the hard to scrub in there too. Much easier and dishwasher ready.

[@alisonm2257]

Beautiful home. I feel like people with newer, up to date homes can get away more with messes. My home is old and small. I cant let anything pile up or get messy.

[@christinem3972]

My home is from 1980’s there is no open floor plan. I don’t have a couch. Very few surfaces. If I don’t put things up as I used. There would not be enough any space. I have a space for going to work. Keys, lunch bag, things to do. It is drop spot after work plus everything I need to go to work.

[@keikomatsuoka2125]

私は日本に住んでます。 とても広くて素敵なお家ですね。 犬達が可愛い！

[@erikabritton5341]

Hello, just watching this for the first time to get some motivation to clean and declutter my own house and I just wanted to offer some kind advice and support. Firstly, you are not just cleaning your house, you are doing three things (cleaning, organizing and decluttering) at once! Girl, no wonder you're tired anyone would be, so give yourself some grace! I agree with the other commenters about getting your family involved as much as you can but until then try setting smaller goals, for example: 1) before bed spend 10 minutes removing just the trash, nothing else, and do this every night, this is will automatically reduce your visual clutter and the emotions that come with it 2) pick a day or time and give yourself 10 minutes to declutter/organize a room or space each day, also a way to reduce visual clutter 3) use a basket system on the first floor (each person get's one) and as your organizing, put items into that persons basket so that they can be put away by that person at a later time, this gives a landing space for things on the first floor without you have to expend energy/time to put things back where they belong and 4) separate deep cleaning from regular cleaning, deep cleaning is much more time consuming when sometimes just a good wipe down is all you need. When we separate cleaning from organizing/decluttering it allows us to focus on smaller tasks and the cleaning becomes easier because we are not trying to do it all at once. I think this will help with the overwhelming feeling. Also, it's important to remember life has seasons and sometimes what we could accomplish in one season is not what we can do in the current season and that's ok. Blessing to you, you are more than enough and you will get through this.

[@jowatkins6375]

Hi, just come across your channel. Please be kind to yourself; you did a great job and showed real life. You will have helped so many people by doing that. I hope your husband's health improves and he gets an answer. Not sure if you have ever seen Remi Clog; she has some great ways of cleaning and tidying when feeling overwhelmed and you don't know where to start.

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you so much! I have reflected on how negative I was in this video and I really hope it’s just leftover bad vibes from worrying about my husband. I really do like myself! 🤣 I have seen Remi Clog but not a ton, I’ll give her a deep dive for some tips! Thank you.

[@jkp62]

Praying for you! When my kids were at home, we homeschooled and it took about 1 year before I got out of the traditional class time mindset set of schooling all day long and 5 days a week. After many trials and errors, I found a schedule and daily routines that kept all of us sane and working together to learn and keep the home together as a family. We schooled 4 days a week, 3 subjects/day an hour for each subject with one 10 minute break in the middle of each hour, at the end of each subject, the kids and I cleaned up that subjects school work and supplies and set out the next subjects needs then an hour break in between. The hour breaks had daily chores to do for me and the kids like the kids making their beds, taking out trash, sweeping the floor, dusting one room, clearing up the meal or snack dishes, etc. Our routines were- Me: getting up at 4am to exercise, shower, get dressed, face and hair done, time with God, then a load of laundry in the washer and starting breakfast by 6:30 and getting the kids up. The kids: up at 7 am, breakfast, kitchen clean up, brushing teeth and getting dressed, bed making, devotional; then at 9am was first subject, 10:10-11- chores like helping to get lunch started or sweeping or dusting, 11-12:10 second subject, 12:15-1pm lunch and clean up and just chilling, 1-2:10 third subject, 2:15-3 more chores or homework, 3-5- free time, at 5 one child helped me get dinner going, another set the table and another fed the animals, 6 was dinner, 6:30 was kitchen clean up, the from 7-7:30 was free play, then baths/showers, then clean up of any toys or books or crafts, 8-9 was devotional, movie or reading and bedtime was 9pm for the kids and 9:30 was my and my husbands bedtime. Our days off from school was a big clean day, field trips, fun time, etc plus always helping with meals, clean up, etc. Each school day was different subjects, Mondays were Math, Science, Art; Tuesdays were English, History, Writing; Wednesdays were Government, Literature, Music; Thursday was Math, English, World History. The routine sounds rigid, but we actually had more time for a lot of things during the day besides school and cleaning, like baking, gardening, going swimming or skiing or ice skating or playing g basketball, soccer, team sports, music ensemble, and just curling up with a book and listening to music. All this because we all participated in keeping our home tidy and with the kids help it went faster, plus, my kids lov d the security in the routines and school schedule. We also homeschooled 6 weeks on and 1-2 weeks off all year round. Remember, we are to raise our children in the way they should go, not just in their faith, but every day living which includes cooking, cleaning, finances, etc so they can leave the home with confidence that they know what to expect and do when in their own home. so all this to say, get your kids involved in keeping their home tidy and clean and your mental and physical health will get a much needed break.

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you for such a detailed schedule! I know I need to get a better schedule going, it would help immensely.

[@tinajernigan1728]

Tip: to easily clean the pan, heat it back up with a little dish soap and water. It will clean up so easy!

[@jennifermorley6487]

This is my first time coming across your content. I know this was a huge amount of work and hard to share, but I wanted to thank you for doing so. It was nice to see a clean with me that was so relatable. We don't all love cleaning and for many of us it can be very overwhelming. Sometimes it can be overwhelming even if it is not as much as you had. As busy women, many of us find keeping up with the house, on top of all our other roles (wife, mother, caregiver, businesswoman, cook, etc.), daunting. I just really appreciate your relatability. I clean my house because I have to, but I too get overwhelmed and I do not enjoy it. I do however try to enjoy the cleanliness afterwards for the few hours it lasts, before I have to start all over again.

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you so much! It is hard work for all of us, isn’t it? I am finding more and more joy in it though. It’s less of a thing I dread but a project in process for me now. You are so welcome in here! I hope to see you around babe

[@jessicamatthews5122]

GIRL! Give yourself some grace. You are way too negative towards yourself. My boys can make a mess like this is one day. You didn't make that mess by yourself, and you shouldn't have to clean and put it all away by yourself. Your home is beautiful. You are beautiful. Please start looking in the mirror and telling you you're important, needed and doing a great job. I need you. I don't know you but I need you so that I can be motivated to get my house cleaned as well! You're helping us. Be proud of you.

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you :) I recorded this voice over after being in the er with my husband all night and I think I was still really negative from all of that. I promise I’m much more positive in general!!

[@jessicamatthews5122]

@feraltradwife good. And I hope that he is doing well. I'm sure I will hear because I will be watching all of your videos from Here on out. Because you are absolutely amazing!

[@MomsBeautifulChaos]

I can feel the overwhelm in your voice and I relate so much! Motherhood is such an overwhelmingly big task. Hugs! You are doing a good job and your best is enough!

[@feraltradwife]

☺️ Thank you!

[@tamaraleewhipple1522]

This is what it looks like when you're living in a house. We mess it up, then we clean it up repeat , repeat. You are doing amazing! I've visited some people's home's every single item & furniture is for show, not for use, no sitting at the dinning table ,drinking from wine glasses, no flopping back on the sofa. I want kids to jump up on the sofa, make messes and then I'll clean up at some point. Just so grateful to have a home and all the material things...If you living in a house, with a family it's not gonna be perfection all ways! But I do enjoy watching Cleaning videos like this, because it's real life family.

[@Eeeekamouse]

Came for the cleaning, subscribed for the comments. ❤ You sound like my inner dialogue.

[@feraltradwife]

Yay! Thank you!

[@deanneghoreishi8605]

Thank you for being so honest and transparent. Thanks for letting other women know the struggle is real and we aren’t I. It alone.

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you! I have been feeling struggling with some of the negativity lately and really needed to hear that. ❤️

[@adrianamunoz2312]

I think most of us can somewhat relate. When My kids were little they would want to help but I wouldn’t let them because it wasn’t the way I like or want. Then years later it got to the point we’re I said ok I give up I’m not spending my life just cooking and cleaning and working full time…And now I ask for help not demand it ask for it and we all pitch in. I hope that helps.

[@Minbeta.ss1]

Cleaning is a family affair. Everyone must do their part. Kids need to be cleaning their rooms and helping you maintain the home neat. It all starts at home and teaching them to take pride in the home they live in.

[@KelleyMiller-fj5mr]

I get it! I have the same problem. When i get down and my mental health is not good it takes a huge toll on me and makes simple things like taking the trash out hard to do. I can tell you that somtimes for me juat getting one thing done can help. Be kind to yourself and just do what you can and it will get better!

[@marshagoodwin5830]

When I cooked, I soaked my pots and pans while we ate, making it easier to clean. Everyone had to clear table and bring to sink. Kids had to keep rooms clean and all dirty clothes in hamper. I hope yours help when you don’t need content. Delegate duties and take care of yourself!!!!

[@tyanneh1]

This is my first time watching your VLOG. I think it's called "decision paralysis," you're so overwhelmed that you just don't know where to start, so you either don't do it, or do just what you know you can't live without, like the dishes and laundry. I do the same thing. A lot of it, for me, has to do with not knowing how to do some things, like I've always had a hard time cleaning my shower, I finally hired a cleaning company to clean my bathrooms. You're doing great, keep it up!!! Can your kids help with chores? Also, are you able to hire a cleaning company to come in once a month to just help you keep up a little? Girl, go ahead and run the half full dishwasher, there's no rule that says you can't, it's not that expensive to run the load and it'll help you at dinner time to have an empty dishwasher. I'm sorry your husband is ill. I hope the doctors figure out soon and they can get him on a road to healing quickly. I bought a pair of shoes just for inside the house to clean in, something about having your shoes on, actually helps me to be more motivated to get stuff done.

[@christinem3972]

Choices home school full time or cleaner full time. Kids in to school then you have clean house. Hire help. Church has people needing make a little money. Church ladies would come help clean and meal prep while you homeschooling. Maybe home schooling and cleaning is not your thing. You made it very clear you are unhappy. Time for life change. Volunteer 30-40 hrs a week. Find a job part-time then move full time. Never say anything you like doing. Never talk about how the kids are doing. How you love homeschooling. How much you love your partner. What is going happen when y’all empty nesters? What happens if partner retires early. Medical retirement. Is in hospital and cannot make money. Goes on disability. Loses partner job and there is no medical insurance. Disability insurance, life insurance Plans and saving set up for children’s care when they are adults. How does your partner feel about how you talk about partner in these videos? Are you happy?

[@lth7023]

Our oldest child was Hyperactive & was eventually Medicated He also had Food Restrictions (so I know a bit about dealing with these kinds of Challenges) You have Austistic TWINS! Double the Challenge! So its even more important to have a Structured Household Routine! (Im giving an Imput here, not Judgement & youve already covered alot of this, but I offer it to your viewers) re-enforcing what you've concluded! Everything has its place & after using it EVERYONE in the House knows to put it back where it Belongs! Laundry & Dishes should be done Daily (run dishwasher at night after dinner, put them away first thing in the morning) so it doesn't build up & overwhelm you! As everyone is leaving the Kiving Room to go to bed, they should always pick up any soda cans or cups, toys, blankets & put them away right then, so no one has to come in to a Messy Living Room the next morning! With Special Needs Children its important to STAY FOCUSED! If you start to change the Litter, don't just drop the bag & leave it there without completing the task! When that's done, then move on to the dishes or start with the Dishes & then move to the Laundry Room! Sweep & then Mop your Floor AFTER you change the Litter & Trash Containers! Keep Liners in your Litter Pans to make clean-up easier, like you did! (we had an electric one that lifted the used litter into a disposable container with a lid & we just changed it once it was full!) Teach your Children how to keep their rooms tidy & how to make their beds! (the bed might be messy but they should get in the habit of doing it & you can encourage them to work on the appearance as they get older) If children are old enough for school, they are old enough to pick up their things & put everything away before bedtime & after they are finished playing with it! Routine helps children stay Focused! Keep their Routine simple but structured! (yours too) It's tough to Home School & Accomidate Special Needs & Diet, but all the more important to have a Routine or Schedule! Kids Love helping Moms clean up & THEN have playtime! If you do these chores EVERY DAY it won't build up & overwhelm you! Get Dad involved with Chores too! He lives there, so he needs to help with the Clean Up! Everyone needs to stay active enough so they are not so tired after they come home that they flop in front of the TV & Zone Out for the rest of the Day! They can help clean up the kitchen after Dinner! YES, we want to just be Superwoman & have everything perfect for him & after he works all day let him relax! But that's not Reality! A Good Life takes Work at Home & at the Job! You have a Beautiful Home & You show Respect & Live Gratefully, to your Husband, Yourself & Your Children if you have a Tidy & Clean Home! Organizing your Life is Extremely Important & Enhances your Life more than you realize! You & your Family DESERVE the very Best & THIS is part of that "Best"! Remind Yourself: I'm NOT a Bad Person, I just need to Organize things Better! (Start Now by Considering how & what you need to do to make each task efficient) You CAN do This... I'm 74 & been Married 57yrs, raised 2 boys & had a Career! So I've been thru a bit! I know YOU CAN DO THIS! (You did the Video didn't you?) Enjoy your Life, Darling. You only get one! God Bless You! 🌹😊🌷 P.S. Both Boys turned out Great! They are 56 & 48. Both have a College Education & Well paying Careers! Oldest in Law Enforcement (Parole/Probation. Dept/Courts & the youngest in Business Mgmt (Gov Contractor after 22yrs in the Army /Sp Ops)

[@heatherj3030]

Wow, you're amazing! I saw plenty of comments about making your kids do more around the house. I just wanted to give you a little encouragement. You're doing great! I homeschooled my 2 boys for 17 years (one is autisic and the other one has ADHD.) Often the house suffered a bit. If I could go back in time, I would have focused more on decluttering. We just had too much stuff for me to manage, and it caused a lot of stress. If I was stressed about it, the kids definitely were reactive too. My youngest graduated last year, and I've really been focusing on getting things out of the house since then. I can feel so much stress leave the house with every car load. It's been so much easier to make myself keep up on daily cleaning. Not perfect, but better. "Dawn the Minimal Mom" and "Dana at A Slob Comes Clean," have both been so helpful to me when I'm feeling overwhelmed. Dawn is also a homeschooling mom and so calm, and Dana has ADHD and has the best declutteringmethodfor people who are easily distracted or overwhelmed. They are awesome for encouragement and motivation. Don't too hard on yourself. You are giving your kids the most important thing, your love and time. I hope your husband feels better soon.

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you so much for the encouragement! I can’t express how much it means to me

[@charrysemitchell4198]

Thanks for sharing! I can relate to how the house can get out of hand when life gets busy. You're doing a great Job! God Bless You!

[@beverlycole4977]

You have a beautiful home. I hope your family can help you more in the future.

[@Sandra-ui1gp]

Hi sweetie I just found your channel and this is my first video. I just want you to know that you are doing your best considering what’s happening in your life. You are so hard on yourself and that worries me. Believe me when I tell you that most of us find our houses like that if we don’t clean in a few days. You are going through a lot with your husbands health so it’s probably taking a toll on your well being and it reflects on your house. I am sorry that people are harsh in the comments instead of motivating you. Your mess is normal for the busy life you are living. Take care of yourself you are doing your best and that’s good enough. I appreciate how real this channel is.❤️

[@feraltradwife]

Oh no! You picked my most negative video to start with! I was in such a bad mood when I did the voice over and realized later that I sound so down on myself. I promise I am much more upbeat usually. Thank you for being so sweet and supportive! I appreciate you!

[@user-cd5xy4uh7t]

You SHOULD be able to LIVE in your home!!! BUT, teaching your children to clean is a skill they're going to need throughout their lives!!!❤❤❤ It starts young!

[@ChandasCash]

Burnt on stickiness in a pot: fill with a little water and bring to a boil on the stove. Works magic for loosening up stuck on food 😊 wish you better days and more help - be kind to yourself, you’re doing a lot and taking care of a lot of people. Enlist their help if possible. You’re doing an amazing job mama!! ❤

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you ❤️ I appreciate it.

[@paolasoltero53]

I'm not saying the heavy duty stuff but small chores taking out trash, vacuuming picking up after themselves. Setting up an example too believe it or not it helps when everyone is working together it's more manageable too. It will help with you feeling overwhelmed and under the weather remove clutter stuff you no longer need.

[@amyroberts1042]

Enjoyed video.🙏🏿for your husband and entire household

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you so much 🤗❤️

[@katespurgeon5572]

I saw a post recently that a therapist told a woman, go ahead and run your dishwasher twice, if that would take away a load of stress. So when things get out of sorts for you, instead of prewashing, run you DW twice, visually clearing sink and countertops !

[@feraltradwife]

Honestly I may do that next go! I wonder if my brain will let me Best case scenario it works and I free up a ton of time. Worst case I pull everything out after it runs and wash it but I tried something new!

[@susanbenton8181]

I see a kid in the background. Teach them to throw away their trash and pickup their clothes shoes toys etc...

[@feraltradwife]

You bet!

[@1984Katta]

What a dreamhome with the layundyroom and all the space and storage!

[@1984Katta]

And that kitchen! 🤩

[@feraltradwife]

It’s so amazing! I really love this home!! The woman who built it knew what she was about.

[@sheilasherwood9125]

You did it!!! YAY!! It looks amazing!!!

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you so much!!

[@farrahroberts5151]

What helps me is to focus on like things. For example pick up all the trash then put away all the food away, then tackle dishes. You are spending a lot of time walking back and forth with one thing. I agree with other people’s comments that your family needs to help. You are doing yourself and your family a big injustice doing it all by yourself.

[@user-bi8sy3is6i]

Kitchen bench is for eating from or cooking from. No homework. Maybe just a bowl 🥣 of fruit a healthy snack for your kids . Play your favourite music as loud as possible and go for it.

[@cleanwithmimi]

Omg!! So sorry to hear about your husband!! I hope you find out what the issue is with him. That is scary to have no answers.. especially after waiting for so long at the hospital. Praying for him! You still did an amazing job hun! ❤❤🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you Mimi!!

[@mila1111]

Finally there's someone who feels same about pre washing dishes before putting them in the dishwasher. 😅 (I also rinse them before the drying cycle...😬)

[@feraltradwife]

I used to rinse them but managed to wean myself off of it 😂😂🤣

[@mila1111]

@feraltradwife That's awesome! I'm working on being less OCD about little things... thank you for your motivation.

[@ahamsammich6408]

So happy I'm not the only one that hand washes dishes before they go in the dishwasher

[@feraltradwife]

You do?!? Listen, I’m considering building up a cult. We would LOVE to have you.

[@ahamsammich6408]

@@feraltradwife do we get t-shirts? 😁

[@feraltradwife]

@@ahamsammich6408 obviously! 🤣

[@user-eu7jb8ev8t]

Put the whole family to work, they should be picking and cleaning up for themselves, being a homemaker doesn't make you their private MAID: Really it's good for kids, these are real life skills needed once they move out!

[@mariamariscal5616]

EXACTLY

[@deborahcincotta3600]

JUST SLOW DOWN AND TAKE IT ONE ROOM AT A TIME AND IT WILL GO SMOOTHER

[@ErocasEclecticEphemera]

I have a house that needs serious cleaning and organizing since having both knees replaced in one year....your video is great motivation for me

[@tiffanyhoudesheldt7004]

Just a friendly reminder that God sees you in the mundane. He sees you when you are over worked and tired, when your killing it, or just don’t feel seen. Your doing great, keep going!

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you!

[@ThePinkJourney388]

I have the same issue…staying on task when I am overwhelmed with housework. I have to intentionally focus on one thing to do or maybe one room at a time.

[@celticjen14]

I see a lot of comments about having your kids help.. I have a feeling that you want to do it because your the MOM, They have other things going on, and/or, you want it done a certain way, since it needs to be done anyway. I am like this too, that’s why I know. But having my 15 year old do some chores and my 22 year old do some, and my husband (sometimes), does help when my house is overwhelming. Just try giving them small chores to start, and see what a difference it makes. You are doing amazing! You are a great loving wife and mama. We are on a learning journey always, together ❤ All my love and prayers..

[@janroth8941]

Listen,be proud of what you have done! Every day is a struggle.

[@ibme2bmoU]

That's a really nice house and furniture you have, girl, it should stay clean and mopping makes it fresh, like it's not clean if you don't mop. There's a lot of options in mops, moreso, the house should look like it's lived in.

[@user-bi8sy3is6i]

Sorry but my first part of home schooling would be clean up after yourselves. In my house the house comes first, I’m a clean freak and have a husky dog and 3 cats but you wouldn’t know cause I’m on top of the mess that comes with having pets. I can’t go to bed without cleaning the kitchen, I refuse to put off work , you are ready on the back foot before you start a new day.Washing and ironing done the same day i iron watching my tv shows before you know it it’s finished and you must put it away. Start in 1 spot and don’t leave until you have finished, unless doing a load of washing hanging it out etc

[@qveenirene829]

I love this! Definitely can’t wait to see the kiddos helping you out!! I feel this and I only have 1 son, but my lil 4 year old cleans up I tell him to pick his toys up and make his bed, sometimes cleaning as you go can be a lot because kids can be a lot and mothers be tired!! For me I suffer through depression and anxiety so I get that the house can get messy sometimes, and become overwhelming.

[@feraltradwife]

Yessssss, welcome to the depression/anxiety spiral zone!!! I’m working hard to keep myself out of it but it can be so hard sometimes!

[@chananjavandewaetere2213]

Now this is a great video❤ you did so much,be proud❤

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you so much 😊

[@chananjavandewaetere2213]

@@feraltradwife you're welcome hun,i know the feeling 🤗 i also have a cleaning channel if you want to check it out the name is chananja's cozy house

[@gracielacharles5529]

The first thing you need to do is to calm down yourself. You making yourself go wild. I suffer with depression and anxiety is not easy but if you have older kids they can help you to clean that is what I do. If you keep up like that you will end up in the hospital.🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@farzaanafisher6662]

To tell a mom whose going through this that her kids are old enough and should contribute to cleaning is very literally the worst thing to say to her. I’m in the same boat. It feels like a punch in the gut when someone says this because we know. We know we should get the kids more involved with cleaning and chores. We know that we are doing them and ourselves a grave disservice by not getting them to do more. Perhaps please consider offering some practical advice on how to achieve that. This is what I struggle with. Advice of what worked for you. Some parents just get it right from the get go and others like myself keep thinking that they will start tomorrow until it seems like it’s too late and you’re absolutely mentally defeated in the matter.

[@danielleS257]

My first visit to your channel and wow. You are definitely dealing with a lot. Health issues can be all consuming. Difficult to watch a partner suffer and chasing answers can be so frustrating and stressful. Add kids, and Autism. Homeschooling. And life. And it can get overwhelming. You’re doing fine. I agree with trying to get kids to help out in age appropriate ways. I get that sounds easier said than done and especially when people aren’t taking the Autism into consideration. Striving for perfection is just adding more to your overflowing plate so be easy on yourself. You can identify areas that you’re struggling and yes, you might need to adjust expectations like silverware. Modern dishwashers should be able to clean but I keep a container full of soapy water throughout the day and those reusable straws and silverware are the only things that stay in the sink until I run the dishwasher after dinner. It softens stuck food and allows the dishwasher to easily clean without washing each individual utensils. Everything else gets rinsed and put in the dishwasher right away. It’s great that your son is cooking. He can also clean his pots too. 😂. You have to be mentally and physically well to help your husband and kids. It’s like putting your mask on first if the plane is going down. Don’t be so hard on yourself. You should see my laundry situation. NONE OF US ARE PERFECT. You are not alone. 💙

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you so much babe

[@patsywilliams5570]

I think I'd start by "teaching " others in the household to help. If they, the children live like this , this is the life that they will have in future.

[@celestia8165]

In case no one has to you, you need to be kinder with yourself. You’re doing great and have a beautiful lived in house. All of this is normal. I’m new here and only at 11:33 minutes but I’m subscribing but be kind and ignore the hater as much as you can’t.

[@feraltradwife]

Welcome!! Thank you for your sweet comments. I am usually so much more positive and kind, I was just really down from the night before in the ER and it really comes across in my voice over. ❤️

[@koroshtanha4082]

I see your video from Iran, I want to say you good job, please want help your husband and your children to clean because that way your house not clean at all , i think every one of family should clean house ❤

[@feraltradwife]

I agree! My children and husband do help clean from time to time. But it is mostly my job and I’m trying to get better! I’m so grateful for your encouragement!

[@koroshtanha4082]

I glad to see your video any way, it was great 🥰

[@donnapardew5410]

My mother had a clean house all the time and she had five children. Her secret was jobs for all the children. We did the dishes after dinner. Rotating a week at a time. One brother s job was empty the garbage one brother had to bring down the laundry every morning one brother had to sweep the porches. . We were all taught to pick up our things. Coats had to be hung up immediately when we entered the house. Simple rules became good habits

[@feraltradwife]

⭐️

[@tammyrouse7422]

I sure hope your all find out what is going on with your husband You go so much done in your house. It is a never ending battle hang in there and God Bless

[@feraltradwife]

Thank you ❤️🙏

[@deborahnewton5455]

It made be just me but I think that you should start by decluttering the living areas because that will make you feel better to be in a more tidy home. You can take care of deep cleaning other things once those tasks are done.

[@everlastinglife8774]

Hello, nice to meet you. I came across this cleaning channel that I do watch cleaning channels to help to motivate me and keep me company. I truly enjoyed this video. I have gotten so much done just watching you work keep doing these kind of videos. This is what I want to see. It’s an encouragement to see someone that has a busy schedule inside or sometimes we just don’t want to do anything as women. God bless you.❤🌹🙏🏼

[@feraltradwife]

God bless you! I’m so glad we’ve found each other!

[@emanuelaperagallo2072]

Quando si incomincia una stanza bisogna terminarla. Organizzati prima di entrarci per esempio la camera da letto: porta le lenzuola pulite, l'aspirapolvere, i panni per la polveri ed i vetri, il prodotto per i mobili, se hai il parquet il secchio e la mazza per lavare. Quando hai tutto incomincia col letto, poi metti in ordine, pulisci mobili e vetri, passa l'aspirapolvere e poi lava. Svuota la camera ed iniziare un'altra. Andare avanti e indietro fa perdere solo tempo e annoia.

[@whitneydowton5770]

you have a very pleasant voice. good job getting started, that is the hardest part sometimes. ❤

[@lynneromolo4148]

Keep to one room at a time you have to keep on top of it or then you will end up overwhelmed again, and yes your children are old enough to clean up after themselves

[@feraltradwife]

Thanks for the tips!

[@user-lh5hq7hc7p]

dont feel ashamed at least your doing something. its no easy. your doing good. your no lazy youve got a big house.

[@Tracney]

I have to agree with others here in the comments. Start setting up a chore board for the kids. They could collect something at the end of the week in terms of either cash, something they want at the store or a treat. They should be responsible for their own things. Example shoes, homework books, dishes, toys, etc.

[@feraltradwife]

Or you could agree with other comments that give encouragement? I do appreciate the engagement, I am working on myself and doing my best! I hope you have a wonderful day.

[@marylyons58]

Young lady, I just watched your video for the first time, and I think you are a rockstar. It seems to me that you have more on you than the average person for certain. Having two children with autism, and A husband with some type of medical condition. I am a retired para educator, who worked with special needs children, and some of those children were autistic. while I am sure your intentions are good, homeschooling your children, it would probably do you and them good to let them go to school so that you can be refreshed. Do you need to do some things for yourself and have time to work on your house so that when they came home you can give them your best. You need to trust someone else to help you out and don’t be afraid to ask for help. I doubt very seriously that you have a lazy bone in your body. Your house is by no means nasty. It just gets cluttered and lived in like anyone else. I intend to subscribe and look forward to seeing future videos from you. God bless you and your family.