The Trad Wife Trend is Setting Women Back Decades & Perpetutating Dangerous Diet Culture

Thanks to Mistplay for sponsoring this video! Download the app for free here: mistplay.com/abbey and use my code Abbey100 inside the app for 100 extra points! Code expires 8/31/24. Limited quantities available & valid for new users only.
Hey everyone I’m Abbey Sharp welcome to Abbey’s Kitchen. In todays video, we will be talking about the evolving "Trad Wife" movement online, and its dangerous intersection with diet culture and disordered eating.
Check out my brand neue theory for your new favourite plant-based, 2-in-1 protein powder probiotic: neuetheory.com/
FREE HUNGER CRUSHING COMBO™ E-BOOK!
www.abbeyskitchen.com/hunger-...
FREE PROTEIN 101 E-BOOK!
www.abbeyskitchen.com/protein...
A FEW DISCLAIMERS
1) The information in this video is for education and entertainment purposes only, so you should always speak to a health care provider about your unique health needs.
2) Please use this video (as with all of my review videos) as educational, not as unique recommendations.
3) Please be kind in the comments.
4) Trigger warning to those with disordered eating tendencies.
5) Don’t forget to subscribe to this channel and ring the little bell so you never miss out!
RESEARCH LINKS
pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/22054...
www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/arti...
Follow me on Instagram and TikTok! @abbeyskitchen
/ abbeyskitchen
/ abbeyskitchen
Anorexia & Restrictive Dieting Freedom E-Course
(Use promo code Abbey20 for 20% off)
grace-s-school-b818.thinkific...
My book, The Mindful Glow Cookbook affiliate link: amzn.to/2nev0lf​​​​​​​​​​​​​ ​​​​​​​​​​​​
Check out my blog for healthy recipes, parenting tips and tricks and busting nutrition myths and diets: www.abbeyskitchen.com
If you liked this video, please leave me a comment below with your thoughts and let me know who you want me to review next!
With Science & Sass,
Xoxo Abbey

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Visit mistplay.com/abbey & use my code Abbey100 inside the app to get 100 extra points! Code valid for new users only.

[@rachelsheppard7232]

The fact that these women bring in an income from this content in itself automatically excludes them from being a "tradwife." They are selling a product, plain and simple. If they donated the money made ALL to a charity of their choice...maybe. But they are making money telling other women to NOT make money or be self-sufficient. That is my issue with it. Just like the advertisements of the 50s that told the ladies who all went to work in WWII to get back in the kitchen, it is propaganda, just with better lighting and technology.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

This is a good point too, the lines get a bit blurry

[@carolinex2390]

This!!!!!!!

[@zeynepmance]

This! "But they are making money telling other women to NOT make money or be self-sufficient"

[@Diana-qp2rw]

That’s what I don’t like about this phenomenon, they show themselves as a traditional wife, but it’s not true, it’s actually their job, just like fitness influencers can build all their life around fitness because it’s their job or travel influencers can travel much more than the average person because it’s their job. Now, I don’t take issue with traditional wifes. In fact, I would love to be a more traditional wife if that’s how life turns out for me, I love making everything from scratch, I love cooking and baking for others, etc. My parents have a traditional marriage and it works very well for them, my mother has no desire to get a job and is very happy she decided to take care of the family instead of working a job. However, she does have a graduate degree and she has some work experience from when she was in college. She and my dad are also equals, they make their decisions together. And that’s what my parents taught me, that it’s important to have education and to communicate. Now, I don’t mind if women show themselves baking and cooking for their families, I think it can be very inspirational. And I don’t mind if they personally decide to submit to their husbands if that works for them. What I don’t like is when they try to tell others that this is the only way, while they themselves aren’t even following what they are preaching, when they tell girls they don’t need an education, and when they want to take away women’s rights.

[@melissaenslin4]

@@zeynepmance This is an excellent marketing strategy as they limit their competition.

[@aprildriesslein5034]

I can't fathom how the idea that "if men disappeared, we couldn't function" leads to the conclusion "so I should be as dependent on them as possible!"

[@misty4483]

If women disappeared men couldn’t function, and they depend on women too. Its sad there seems to be so much animosity.

[@davyrantucci]

And technically if men leave, or women, there is no re populating the earth so you couldn’t really function. lol. Not as a growing society. I also don’t see women lining up to do the really hard manual labour jobs. Can they do it? I’m sure. Do they want to do it? The majority don’t or women would be dominating those fields more than office/corporate jobs. It’s takes two.

[@zellalaing5439]

​@@misty4483ngl from all the studies I've seen, where hetros are concerned, women arr better off alone, men are better off in marriages, so my conclusion is, us gays have it best 😂😂

[@cristipachano-fj2zr]

Some men have already disappear of worst put their “patriarchal foot on women neck”!! I always wonder what would the world be like if women became the leaders !

[@AbianahBarbie]

Women did survive just fine in the war when men where drafted. women went to work and provided for their families. Majority of college graduates are women. Women would be just fine.

[@pamelaatkinsonscats2873]

The concern I have is not only submissiveness, but women wanting to give up having the vote?! After women sacrificed their lives and their freedom for us to have the vote, it’s insane to want to hand over all power to men. It’s asking for trouble.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Ya no thanks I'd like my right to vote

[@Amyjwashere]

Stay at home sure, but never give up your rights!

[@ST-rj8iu]

What I don't understand is that what they want, they can do. If you don't think women should vote, don't vote. But they still do. Live your life and stop worrying about other people. The only person stopping you from staying home with kids is you and your husband. Nobody says you have to work.

[@alexandrajanee6149]

Makes me so mad, women are made for more than this

[@Diana-qp2rw]

@@ST-rj8iuIt’s not that easy. If it is the norm that both parents work, it’s the norm that one household has more money to spend, hence one household can afford higher prices, which in turn makes it harder to afford to have a family with only one income. I’m not saying I believe women shouldn’t be allowed to work, but I understand the reasoning and I personally think it would be amazing if it was more normal (and by that I mean affordable for most people) that in families, one parent would stay at home while the other works or both parents work halftime. And regarding the vote, I think most people who don’t women to vote don’t like how women vote, that’s the true reason they oppose women voting.

[@pearl_b]

I remember once hearing that “female thinness isn’t about looks, it’s about control” and that really stuck with me… if you can keep a woman preoccupied and obsessed with her appearance and food, she’ll likely not have the bandwidth for much else

[@BrittKatSlat]

And any kind of obsession with looks. Like investing money and time and thoughts in anti-aging, makeup, plastic surgery, botox- etc.

[@nicolegrimm9904]

At 50YO, I find myself thinking a lot lately about how many years of my life so far I’ve spent worrying about exactly this instead of using all that time and energy more productively.

[@ilaeoa]

Also, starvation weakens willpower and critical thinking.

[@RamenzillaX]

My biggest issue is really that this trend seems so….aesthetic based. It’s shallow. It’s not practical. It’s increasingly difficult to afford the same lifestyle on the average single income salary - which is already not what these influencers are doing because they are contributing income to the household through advertising. It’s like plantation weddings; the house might be pretty on the outside but the history of it is NOT. That being said, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with loving to cook and loving to cook for other people. That’s beautiful and should be celebrated, but none of this content really shows any reciprocity which is what is weird.

[@davyrantucci]

I’m raising 9 on a farm, on my Husband’s salary. It is doable. You have to be willing to do things like cook your own food, give up Starbucks etc. Many today aren’t willing to do those things so they think it’s unattainable. There is a lot of aesthetically pleasing videos sure. But there are just as many, actual Trad wives without that aspect sharing recipes, homeschool tips, gardening tips, homesteading tips etc. Most of my friends who live like I do, we all watch the same videos on YT that share those tips and we help each other. We don’t record what we are doing certainly, but are thankful for all those who do, as it’s helping us in our daily lives. If people feel weird about the videos they can choose to not watch…

[@ellecandy2109]

​@davyrantucci did you buy the farm and have a mortgage on it?

[@davyrantucci]

@ellecandy2109 we paid the mortgage off in 2 years, as we had saved a big down payment beforehand. Now we own everything out right. We follow Ramsey and his financial plans. So we have no debt as we don’t pay for anything with loans or credit cards etc.

[@Miaow610]

@davyrantucci Holy moly, 9?? I'm totally impressed. I value learning from traditional wives like yourself, so many skills involved in raising and feeding a family, homesteading etc. and so much experience to learn from. My issue with the influencers is that they don't actually live the life people like yourself are living, so learning from them is rather limited. For example, many of them edit videos to make it appear as though they've done an inhumane amount of work in a day when the footage was actually recorded over several days, like claiming to have cleaned the whole house and cooked several meals from scratch and done five loads of laundry and styled their perfect hair/makeup, clothes, heels etc. It's not a bad thing to do for entertainment purposes, but how can we learn from a pretend image of an idealised life rather than from people who actually live a traditional wife life? We're not getting a real sense of what it's like or what's actually achievable. I love watching homesteading videos, the actual trad wives like you say, and feel like I learn a lot more from those. I believe most who criticise these influencers are not trying to criticise actual traditional wives, well, certainly not in my case. Anyway, wishing good health and happiness for all of you!

[@davyrantucci]

@@Miaow610 I agree..I watch those that are considered homesteaders more. I guess I’d consider that an actual Trad wife, versus someone who talks of the lifestyle but doesn’t really have much to add other than talking points, if that makes sense? I came to this channel to learn more about the foods I feed my family and now I’ve unsubscribed as that is the main reason I watch the others. Farmhouse on Boone is a favourite of mine. I don’t feel she says much about the lifestyle, rather shares tips, is the sour dough queen etc. I find you can actually tell who is the real deal by if they have a website, and what they have on there. If it’s a good one it’s filled with information more than stuff to sell to people. So I agree some people are just faking for sure, but even with Ballerina Farm, like is mentioned in this video, I love some of the recipes I have found and the set up on their homestead is beautiful. I don’t think they claimed to not have money etc. They just live their life. Good for them.

[@marileenestrada1724]

i think it’s also important to note that it’s literally nara’s job to film herself making those elaborate dishes-her videos get a tremendous amount of views and i’m sure she makes crazy money from those videos. of course the reality of making meals and so on will be totally different for non-influencer working class women! so no one should feel bad for not making their kids cereal from scratch or feeding their husbands and kids exactly the way she does

[@AbbeysKitchen]

I agree, if you're able to make cereal from scratch: incredible. But if you can't, you're not any less of a woman or mom

[@davyrantucci]

Did they say to never eat box cereal? Or is it showing an alternative to box cereal and everyone is upset by that?

[@blueblack3591]

I mean Nara never described herself as a TradWife. She never says others should live the life she lives. She just does what she likes

[@misty4483]

Smart. She found a way to be at home doing what she loves and a business, making money doing it. Kudos to her.

[@audreybringgold6217]

Any Christian message about women submitting to their husband's needs to be completely contextualized. When you look at the whole passive of scripture, it is very clear that the husband is called to literally be like Jesus which implies so much. Ie: Jesus washing the feet of his disciples, ministering to cast outs, and forgiving the people who killed him as they killed him. The message is not to submit to an abusive controlling man, but sadly I think Christians have MANY centuries worth of unpacking to do on this topic.

[@davyrantucci]

Actually if you follow or attend a good Church, you don’t have this problem, generally. I’ve been like this for 20 years. And while the woman is told to submit to her Husband, and respect him, he is commanded to Love us and lay down his life for us, as Jesus did. Also with the man being the head, many women confuse the word submit with oppression which really it’s the opposite! There are so many decisions, that while I’m taking care of the kids, the house, the farm animals etc, my Husband is making all these decisions, and if anything fails…it’s all on him. And it’s not like he just makes choices and doesn’t include me…I think women have bought into the lie that submission means lesser than, when we are equal in dignity. My submission frees me up to only have to care about the things I want to care about, and none of the things I don’t. Also helpful when I get a million questions a day from the kids about things…I defer them to dad lol.

[@catherinedepalma6965]

Yes!! You said this better than I was going to. Thank you.

[@audreybringgold6217]

@@davyrantucci I'm glad that works for you. I consider myself a pretty darn conservative christian, and this passage has been interesting in my marriage (only 7 years so far). For me, the way it plays out is that I see submit as more of an emotional thing or like putting down the weapons. I think there's an attitude a lot of people have, and I've had at times, that men are the problem or that husbands always do everything wrong. And there's this grouchiness and abruptness that comes with it. So for me I see submit as more approaching him as a teammate and giving up my anger or whatever emotional weapon I'm wielding. But as far as financial decisions and parenting decisions, things work best when we co-lead in those areas. If my husband felt really strongly we needed to go do something, we would not be doing it unless I felt similarly (for big life stuff). But his workplace is totally separate from me, if he farmed for a career I would probably leave most or all of the farming to him too.

[@davyrantucci]

@audreybringgold6217 oh yeah no there are my areas like the children more, I attend to animals needs in that I help care for them, but he does the grunt work of providing shelters and figuring out winter plans…I don’t do that. The children daily needs that are met, he doesn’t question me on it. When it comes to something big, he talks it over with me for sure. Like when our teens got cars etc, that was a mutual discussion but I left it up to him to go buy it…that type of a thing. I think people see the word submit and think oppress…and they also think that means the man makes decisions and doesn’t consult etc. I’m happy not to have to waste time shopping for a vehicle for my child. I trust he will get them good ones, and I don’t want to heckle prices etc lol. That type of thing. But you are right a lot of it is attitude based for sure. My Husband works very hard and deserves all my love and respect and he provides well for us. I’m very lucky, and I’m always willing to let go of a preference for my way and to have my Husband do the heavy work haha.

[@alicetaylor3275]

⁠​⁠​⁠@@davyrantucciyes !! This is what I was coming to say !! Every decision we make is made together but he has the final approval.. but as far as the actual execution of said act. It depends which one of us is stronger in that area of knowledge or time to do said act. It’s a team thing. There is no 50/ 50 in marriage it’s 100/100 ..

[@Imbatmn57]

We don't need to bring back the toxic submissiveness, but the ability to live with others to take care of each other, doesn't have to be spousal relationships, just people living together to make life better for each other.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Yep! Social connection is huge for health

[@Mikathedog100]

Ahh, no, that's socialism, ahh, ahh, AHHH!!!! Jk 😉

[@katelijnesommen]

Sure! I live with four other adults and we really invest time in our home life and all take responsibility in the home to make it run smoothly and be there for each other practically and emotionally. But what I don't understand is why this would or should be a "woman's job"?! Taking care of each other shouldn't be gendered at all.

[@Imbatmn57]

@@katelijnesommen i don't mean for everything to be regulated to one gender, everyone should know how to do things to take care of each other regardless of gender.

[@katelijnesommen]

@@Imbatmn57 oh no, I didn't necessarily mean that's what you meant, sorry if it came across like that. It's just that for some reason many people do and I don't get it.

[@acerrubrum5749]

Please remember these KZbin Trad wives, *do have a paying job*, building a YT channel and getting paid for it. Curating the lifestyle, buying the "things" and using them ( available in the links or in their Amazon shop), lighting, sound, filming, editing, doing collaborations, hustling their channel. It is a business, and has the tax deductions to prove it. BTW, no one recreates a product from scratch the first time, either fudging the truth on taste or not showing the 10-20 previous failures. Please note also they are sure to feature ASMR, the latest trendy YT hook.

[@annaschmidt2]

The focus on eating clean to prevent disease implies that disease is caused by a bad diet or bad food choices (which is a moral failing in many people's eyes). Even those who eat very healthy, exercise regularly, and go to church can get cancer or suffer from multiple sclerosis. It is not lack of morals or lack of personal responsibility that determines whether or not you will get sick. I wish more people would talk about this.

[@kuki2349]

As a nutrionist I can tell you a lot of diseases can indeed prevented by diet. Does it guarantee you're healthy for the rest of your life? Absolutely not. Does it decrease your chances of getting a lot of diseases? Many studies have proved this. It's just misinformation saying it doesn't make a difference.

[@lisarhoades3559]

It’s all good and dandy until the husband leaves along with the sole income - it happened to my aunt who fell apart. Not for me - I will always support myself and enjoy processed food here and there 😮

[@lanadellola]

yup. all the delusional women in the comments are making me laugh. you genuinely think the loser your married who doesn’t clean after himself, take care of his children, or really have respect for you nor your motherly duties won’t cheat?

[@AbbeysKitchen]

sorry to hear that about your aunt!

[@misty4483]

Spousal support.

[@Dory8]

@lisarhoades3559 Stay at home mums, as far as I'm concerned, should be paid. They labour in the home, but our capitalist society disguises the fact that what they do is a job because then they would have to be paid. We could start with no referring to women as 'stay at home' (they're home managers).

[@98rsmethills]

I think it's worth realising that much of the women who are online 'trad wives' are actually entrepreneurs lol they earn money making videos ect and some even sell products based around their lifestyle

[@sarahays179]

Well after watching that I’m off to eat some pop tarts while I look for my copy of The Feminine Mystique.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Betty would have something to say about this

[@bananaquiet]

I'm a feminist housewife and when we were living in Texas ten years ago I stumbled into this in my fb groups. I tried to make everything from scratch. I got orthorexic for sure. Been doing intuitive eating for a couple of years now, snacks are now allowed in my house, processed food as well, and not only is everyone in my family still healthy, but I'm a lot healthier and happier. We still hardly ever get sick, eat plenty of fruit and vegetables, and I still cook plenty, but nothing is off limits. Processed food has helped me teach my kids to cook more easily, so they feel empowered. And they can pack their own lunch.

[@silverpriestess1674]

Society is turning into a saga of "My way of being a woman/man/mother/father/daughter/son is better than your way, and I'm discretely trying to let you know so I feel validated in my existence"

[@AbbeysKitchen]

100%%%%%% i feel this so hard as a working mom and im sure SAHM feel the same

[@susanknoth5982]

It was already that way. The SAHMs have been getting judged for years since women started working. My own mother went through it. Worked when women didn’t worked. Stayed home when they started entering the workforce in droves. And they are still getting shamed. Just as working woman are being shamed. It’s mostly women doing the shaming, so 🤷🏻‍♀️. If you don’t like someone’s content, you can always scroll on by.

[@silverpriestess1674]

@susanknoth5982 Prescisley my point - neither working nor stay at home mother's should be made to feel any less a human being by one another. The content creators who perpetuate the narrative of the SAHM through the lense of a superiority complex may be creating unrest in society due to their need to affirm their way of life as superior and "correct". There is no objective, correct way to live life as a mother, or anyone else for that matter, however, tropes such as the one discussed in the video claim otherwise.

[@blucie9768]

Truly baffled at this kind of thinking. You want to bake pop tarts from scratch in heels and a puffy dress? Knock yourself out! But one day they're going to find out why women fought so hard for equality, for their own money, for the vote, for freedom... And it's going to hurt

[@davyrantucci]

Why? One day? Meaning she can’t have a happy lifelong marriage?

[@misty4483]

Ive done this life style for 30 years and its awesome. Ive taken jobs here and there when my kids were older, but I never had to work. I was happy to be able to stay at home with my children, raise them, and not be overwhelmed with a job and the home too. My husband focused on building a business and work, and was home when he was not working. Its total freedom. There is some sacrifices, but all worth it.

[@davyrantucci]

@@misty4483 It’s sad that women are being taught to be so distrustful of men. If you choose right, and work on your marriage, you are married for life. Congrats on 30 years…I’m a decade behind you. It’s a beautiful life ❤️

[@misty4483]

@@davyrantuccithank you i hope you have a beautiful life as well. All the best to you❤️

[@wuzittooya]

@@davyrantucciQuit being obtuse. Abuse, adultery, and DV happens. Better a woman has the ability to be completely independent despite being married, than to be completely dependent on a man who may end up hurting her or any kids.

[@survivalsahm9481]

Thank you for this as a SAHM of two autistic kids living in the middle of the Tradwife neighbourhood the whole life style they chose and try to impose/guilt us over is exhausting. We’re a comfort/safe food home for our neurodivergent family. It’s just hard being surrounded by it day in and out. We do what makes us happy, regulated and healthy. Sure some days the plate is a lovely shade of beige, but others it’s full of rainbows 🍓🍇🍊🍋🍌🥑😂 .

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Sounds like you’re doing a great job mama!!!

[@kathyryder828]

I'm an autistic adhd SAHM with autistic adhd kids. We also homeschooled for 6 years. I hear you about safe foods, comfort foods and pressure from the community.

[@Amyjwashere]

What’s interesting is my parents followed regular gender roles, and whenever I asked them about it they just shrugged and said it just happened naturally for them. Part of being a feminist though is embracing the women who do want to stay home and be homemakers. Nothing wrong with that too

[@lanadellola]

feminism gives women the choice, but we’re allowed to advise you. and being in a financially dependent relationship with someone is not good under any circumstance. death? cheating? that life insurance will only get you so far. and you’ll have nothing if you get a divorce. you will have a couple decades gap in your resume. you’re already a woman with children, and for that reason they’d be less inclined to hire you. but not a lot of experience compared to your male counterparts? yeah, no. traditionalism is fine is very in few aspects but terrible in most.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Exactly! I mentioned that in my video too

[@katelijnesommen]

Nothing wrong with that per se, but for some reason most of those women actually do want to roll back fundamental women's rights like the vote, and there certainly is something wrong with THAT. I like plenty of "tradwife" things like making sourdough and taking care of the people in my household, and I totally respect mothers who stay at home with their kids, but I'd also still like to be an equal citizen in my country and have choices.

[@Mikathedog100]

Kind of. I stayed home with our disabled daughter because, as an engineer, my husband made more money than I could with the same level of education, in a more flexible work environment. It was my choice not to put our daughter in childcare, yes, but it wasn't entirely my choice to be the one to stay home, if that makes sense...

[@Dory8]

@Amyjwashere Yet, men aren't choosing it.

[@user-mn4sp3hd4q]

I love the fact my daughter can see that BOTH myself and my husband juggle having careers and doing all the household chores. We both have our own routines and love to cook! Why do people have to play into gender stereotypes? Women have worked too damn hard to get choice, other women need to stop undermining how powerful women are in the workforce, we need to be represented in all walks of life!

[@bettievonnoir9579]

I think women should do what makes them feel fulfilled and happy. The shaming of other women and giving up rights is when it starts becoming a problem.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

No need to shame other women for using and enjoying their rights

[@Dory8]

@bettievonnoir9579 These are not stay at home wives; these are affluent wives selling a right-wing agenda much as anti-vaxxers are.

[@mckenzienieb]

@@AbbeysKitchenjust like there’s no need to shame women for wanting to stay home and raise their own kids??

[@meghanadontireddy6002]

​@@mckenzieniebYes, that is what Abbey meant. She is not discrediting the fact that women can choose to be homemakers, but that they have the Choice to do that or work ❤

[@ArcaneLuxian]

I'm not a trad wife I'm just a tired ass mom at home trying to keep her baby fed, alive, and not surrounded in a gross home... my right to vote or hold a degree/job has zero to do with that. I'm a great mom, so says my husband who eats his store bought fruity pebbles with a smile.

[@blueblack3591]

Nara Smith is not a TradWife. She is Model who likes to cook from Scratch

[@laurahewitt5451]

“Potential” for encouraging ED?I haven’t gone more than a few minutes into the video, but I saw a video yesterday saying that a “high value woman” who will cook and clean for you and be super loyal and “feminine” is - and I quote, “low iron.” I think I sprained an eye muscle rolling them so hard.

[@kathyryder828]

That's problematic in so many ways!

[@debbieleemiszaniec6142]

I loved your comments about using hunger to control women. Hunger has been used for control of people and groups of people throughout history, politically, ethnically, economically, as well as religiously. It strikes me as interesting that at the same time that women achieved more control of their public/economic/political selves than possibly ever before in western history, we became subjected to an aesthetic cult of slimness that required voluntary starvation to achieve that thinness. Even more interesting, this cult of slimness set up an obsession with food that reinforced the traditional gendered assignment of the task of cooking.

[@dookyy]

Back in the days there were a lot of stay-at-home moms but people weren't really allowed to get divorced so many suffered through terrible abuse. My mom stayed at home to raise me and my brother, and i am very thankful for it because I see the work she put in, but she wasn't financially free and that impacted her for sure. In a perfect world everyone would be respectful, loyal and all but in reality, that's just not the case. Being independent is an important value of mine, so that I can make my own choices. Also, with today's economy, it puts a lot of pressure on the partner who has to provide alone for the whole family. With the high prices of houses/apartments, groceries, it isn't a realistic lifestyle for most people. At that point, its for people who are privileged to have a high income. Also, the trad wife movement online is made up of influencers making money off of it, so they aren't even trad wife with no income. They would have a way out if their partner would take advantage of them, contrary to the submissiveness they portray.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

so many good points here, thnks for sharing!

[@moringsdaughter]

I disagree that being a stay-at-home wife is only for high income families. My husband and I have sacrificed a lot of potential income for me to stay home with the children. His job isn't even high paying. He chose it because it allows a lot of flexibility and availability to the family. Our kids are on Medicaid and we qualify for WIC. We have to keep our budget tight, but that's a sacrifice we chose to take to raise our kids at home. We have a lot of social welfare in the US that allows families to survive off single incomes, by choice or by necessity. It helps that we prioritized living in a low cost of living area instead of all the entertainment benefits of a larger city. As our kids grow our priorities will probably shift to living in an area with better educational resources and I'll shift away from the SAHM to make up the increased income needs.

[@mariejulie1081]

I’m weirded out by some of the comments - apparently I do live in a bubble were stuff like this ancient views on femininity are a thing of the past 😅 thought everything you said was well phrased and in my opinion has merit. 🙌🏼

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Thanks Marie🥰

[@jessiesmith2162]

Ballerina Farm’s Hannah definitely inspires me with her cooking… it makes me want to create more home cooked meals. I don’t feel as if she pushes a submissive lifestyle because she is such a leader in her home and business

[@davyrantucci]

I found inspiration from her too. I also like farmhouse on Boone

[@katelijnesommen]

@@davyrantucci I also really enjoy Lisa's content, although our lives are very different. She's helped me get my sourdough schedule on point. She never preaches or pushes and I feel like she is the absolute boss of herself in her home and business and that her husband actually really supports that, too. I'll also check out Farmhouse Ballerina for more inspiration :)

[@Leo-mr1qz]

I really don't understand the obsession nowadays to promote or push your lifestyle off onto others. You do you❣️ What works for you and your family is what is best for you and your family. Why monetize your way of life on KZbin and then tell other people not to make money? That's quite hypocritical, in my opinion. Do unto others as you wish to be done to yourself. ❤

[@cassidydavis4421]

I’ve never seen any of them say “don’t make money”. Stay at home moms have been figuring out ways to make money from home forever

[@Leo-mr1qz]

@cassidydavis4421 Well, that's a relief! I don't watch them, but the way it was described, it sounded as though it was implied,in my opinion. I'm a stay-at-home mother and substitute teach here and there. I agree. We all are looking for ways to make money. 😁 Kids want and need stuff, break stuff, want to make stuff, eat stuff, etc.etc. It's Neverending ❣️

[@Saraflowerk]

100%. Live and let live.

[@misty4483]

Yes. Sounds like they are business women, holding channels, presenting their lifestyle and finding a way to get paid for it. Good for them. Nobody has to agree with it, watch it or subscribe to it.

[@andreabalcer989]

I had not heard of this trend and now I’m terrified. The handout for what a feminist is was mind blowing. So many issues this one. Great video and content!

[@kathyryder828]

The trad wife movement has links to white supremacy and conspiracy theory rhetoric too. It truly is problematic in many ways.

[@CupsAreUseful]

i have to admit, i watch so many homesteading videos (as a queer single woman in the suburbs😂) and ive been curious about my newfound obsession with this content too. and i think youre so on the nose- many of us in the US feel a disintegration of structure and unity and it’s left many like me feeling confused. while i love how much more freedom i have in my gender versus say, my mom did, watching the homesteading videos bring me comfort. leaning on multigenerational teachings from being a third generation farmer on the same plot of land, the simplicity of producing your food from your own home, and working together with a big family is so appealing to a “liberal university” feminist😂 thanks for always being on top of the culture and staying curious, while being humble, honest and transparent about your views!

[@davyrantucci]

I’m a mom with a ton of kids on a homestead…just want to say, I feel like there is a lot of comfort in it, I think it goes at our roots of being connected with nature and food etc, also I feel my life is very romantic in how I live it…but will say, it also take work. The work though involves labour and not as much mental..which honestly..with social media etc we are all mentally exhausted, hence the comfort we find in it. But I know of some people who thought living on a homestead would be great, and then discovered it wasn’t..lol. We all crave simplicity and tradition but it’s because our general environments don’t. You know? However the homestead community welcomes you if you ever want to jump in ;) lol

[@HairyTaleFarm]

I have a small homestead and consider myself a "homesteader" so I am surprised it gets lumped in with the trad wife thing. I'm single and always have been. The real basis of homesteading is independence and self-reliance. For both men and women. Not that you don't need or want help from others. (I get plenty) Just about good old freedom. This is why everyone's homestead looks different from each others. It's about creating the home and security you want for yourself. Mine includes a bunch crazy hairy chickens, lol. I also love creating healthy recipes from scratch most days, but love that cheep jar of alfredo sauce or frozen fried rice for quick easy nights. I don't believe in all or nothing. I like that you enjoy the homesteading videos. 🙂I do love that we all get the freedom to watch just about anything that interests us on KZbin and don't have to rely on "suits" at some major network to give me limited options.

[@davyrantucci]

@@HairyTaleFarm I think because it’s “traditional”. I think Trad wife content of the 1950’s etc is not really reflective of being a traditional wife. It’s one way it can be expressed, sure. But there are more of us who live traditionally, on farms, raising children, many homeschool, that we consider traditional. Homesteading doesn’t have to be only for traditional people certainly, but it is a return to a more traditional lifestyle, self sustaining, than modern notions of living in condos in the city so I think that is why it’s lumped in. I think those of us raising families this way consider that to be more of an actual traditional wife. Also all the homesteading wives that I follow, do generally have more traditional families, and happen to film while they go about their day. But they aren’t pushing a lifestyle like this video suggests they do at all.

[@kaleido9631]

I hate this movement because it is extreme. It's a radical 180 from feminism - which was a radical 180 from the 50s or whatever. Like we keep flip flopping between extremes it seems like, but balance is really where the most peace is found.

[@misty4483]

I think its born from the extreme feminism of late.

[@Saraflowerk]

So true!

[@courtneymciverepps298]

Amazing work. Thank you for fighting the good fight!

[@RomeoNJulietLostTheGame]

Thank you a lot of people needed to hear this ❤

[@CasaBonitaDominical]

Superb video. Thank you for your honesty, common sense, and courage in addressing this. This movement saddens me in so many ways.

[@nicolegrimm9904]

Smart and important analysis of these intersecting movements, thank you

[@carolineh.908]

This is such an important topic!! It’s so hard to balance health and convenience needs. Could you talk about the cancer risks associated with processed meats? I’m struggling to determine which processed foods are helpful in moderation and which are actually dangerous when consumed at all.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Thanks! When it comes to processed meats, we do know that they increase risk of some cancers. But there's a difference between eating a hot dog everyday, and eating one a couple times a year at a bbq. I try to make the majority of my proteins poultry, fish, plant-based proteins, etc., but some chicken sausage every once in a while won't kill you

[@nitiiakadeathbat]

I watched a video where a woman made a gluten-, dairy- and flour-free cheese cacke and she said it's without any "toxic" ingredients... Well. But, what was most surprising to me, she used cashwes as a base for this cake and for other cakes she used almonds. Almonds and cashews are fucking expensive in Europe! At least where I live a pack of cashews with 275g costs 5€ this is not sustainable for anyone. So like you said, alm this "clean" eating is just for the rich and famous.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Financial accessibility is another huge factor, definitely

[@mymeloo4108]

another video?? queen sharp is FEEDING us 🤩

[@suzyh5874]

I love how you break down the terrifying and disturbing messages in these absurd trends. Much much appreciated.

[@Th4tgir111]

This is such an important topic. Thank you Abbey! You covered so many important topics! I thought everything was so well said ❤

[@AnnaJaneJack]

Thank you for inspiring me to study as a dietitian. You have helped both my mental health and body xx

[@Zoe-wl3uw]

Thank you for addressing this issue.

[@Second2LastPioneer]

All I can say is love this video. Thanks for hitting this straight on. ✌🏻

[@kimnenninger7226]

This is a good video. You handled this subject very well.

[@saharrevell7466]

I looove this truly thoughtful video- you have so much empathy for everyone you talk about and it makes these videos so enjoyable and actually helpful. Social media seems to either really support tradwives and dismiss any criticism as ‘non-feminist feminism’ or just completely sneer at tradwives and dismiss why women today might turn to that lifestyle. You did an excellent job of non-judgementally pointing out the dangers and you’re one of the first creators I’ve seen do that! 👏👏👏❤❤

[@bellak5650]

I love you SO much, Abbey.

[@judyhaynes209]

Thanks Abbey! Very informative. Amazingly I had never heard of this craze. It’s shocking how closely society is coming to Handmaids Tale territory

[@meghanmagowan2101]

That apple green colour looks lovely on you!

[@maaripoim9049]

Bravo, @Abbey! Love this content. Love to you!

[@PrettyMistakes]

Great video, Abbey! Very informative and entertaining as always. Also, I love how many times you swore in this video! 😂

[@lejladruskic8943]

I work as a nursing assistant in home care and one of my clients daughter lost her husband at 60 and has been unable to function on her own because she was just used to being the "traditional wife." That just one example where we can see that no matter the gender, you should be an independent individual and capable of doing the basic in order to survive.

[@brendamclean8447]

You have such great content and information! Your channel is really awesome❤

[@deliaventer8448]

Abbey! Your eyes are just POPPING in that green😍

[@aquannaishii2859]

God I love your work! You are the message that young girls need to hear. I wish people like you and your message was available when I was younger. I so appreciate what you do. I’ll be having my future children listening to this.

[@briannejohnson9036]

Your so right , I'm Reglan you said this ❤

[@karenkatz2024]

Thank you for this post, it was so informative. Could you please do a video on the anti-oatmeal obsession? My son loves the stuff, but now I am somewhat afraid to give it to him. Thank you!

[@lisar5418]

As usual I love your sassy self. This is a movement I've been seeing pop up for years, and it sucks that its becoming more mainstream. The link to potential eating disorders is not one I saw initially but I totally see it now. These movements hurt women in such insidious ways.

[@gabbylafleurdamazonie]

Loved this video!! ❤❤

[@pandabearsix]

As a sahm and a Nara smith lover, I was worried when I clicked on the video but I think this was a pretty balanced take. any “trend” that creates any impossible standard for women is not beneficial for us, even the ones who would like to live on a little farm and make cheese from scratch ❤

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Thanks for taking the time to give my video a watch❤

[@Miaow610]

If they talked about their actual jobs - being relatively successful influencers - more often and how they have an independent source of income, discussed the business side of things or how they balance the work with their sahm schedule etc. I think I'd feel more positively about these tradwife influencers

[@Dory8]

@Miaow610 But then that will give the game away. It would be like a magician discussing how he accomplishes his tricks as he's doing his act. They're not traditional housewives; that's a gimmick.

[@Miaow610]

@Dory8 exactly, it is a gimmick. Difference is magicians don't tell other people they can achieve the same impossibilities, everyone knows they're creating an illusion. These influencers claim the illusion is absolutely real and possible for any woman to achieve 🙄

[@misty4483]

@@Dory8they are on social media, making money by creating content lol, theres no magic trick.

[@Dory8]

@@misty4483 Who said they weren't? You, who else. The point is, they're making content about being a trad wife when they clearly are being the opposite. To have stated such a thing one would have had to have known they were on social media making money about it. Duh? They're pretending to be something they're not like being lady for a day or like Marie Antoinette playing at being a milk maid. That's what they're not saying because it would contradict their image as a trad wife. Jeesh! Brush upon your comprehension skills.

[@misty4483]

Again, they are on social media creating content. Lol. Why are you responding in such a rude manner to such benign comments. Triggered much? lol.

[@alexorpen3382]

It’s not demonising or being “scared” of processed food. It’s about having a choice. If someone feels empowered eating things from scratch then that’s amazing, most people would hate it and cannot envision that lifestyle for themselves. Also Othorexia is not the same as making choices from an empowered state.

[@Minerva-sv2zv]

Choosing natural, whole foods is ALWAYS right! No matter whether you´re a TradWife, a non-TradWife, a husband, boyfriend, girlfriend or single.

[@kaliepawlik2029]

To me, one of the most shocking and dangerous parts of the movement is unsafe canning practices or "rebel canning" (e.g. water glassing eggs). This risks literally poisoning with known harmful ingredients or exposing families to botulism... Wild!

[@erzsebetkovacs2527]

Why is it called rebel canning?

[@kaliepawlik2029]

@@erzsebetkovacs2527 because they are knowingly going against FDA canning guidelines.. 🤦‍♀️

[@davyrantucci]

I’m new to the canning world but isn’t that essentially just pickled eggs? Like aren’t they using vinegar etc too?

[@katelijnesommen]

Same with the raw milk thing tbh. There are certainly a lot of merits to trying to cook with whole foods as much as possible and restrict processed food, but then there are also those actually risky home canning or pushing raw milk ideas. They must be falling for the pseudoscience there, because I'm sure none of them would knowingly expose their families to those risks, but it's worrying that they are including those things in their "healthy" tips and protocols.

[@divadoc07]

Because they actively discourage educating women, so by definition they do not understand science. Trad wives - "polio was eradicated by sanitation, not vaccines", also trad wives - "I'ma ignore safe canning practises and feed my baby raw milk and honey"

[@tinam269]

that tank top makes abbey's eyes look amazing!!!

[@stephaniearmour1]

Nara has made it clear that nobody expects her to cook this way and that she just likes to. I never see or hear her say everyone should cook the way she does and she never says we should eat the way she does. She never mentions her weight and calories. I don’t think she applies here.

[@robinmccatty7662]

Wow!! Never heard of “Trad Wives” before. This is so off! That propaganda was extremely racist and absolutely NOT ACCEPTABLE 😡 This is absolutely cultish. Ladies, let’s do better!!!

[@davyrantucci]

I’m a trad wife and watch trad wife content and have never seen that comparison until this video. Not sure where she found it but it’s disturbing.

[@robinmccatty7662]

@@davyrantucci glad to know this!

[@kream4142]

Abby, this video is truly amazing. For a while now I've been reading and watching content about the politically conservative themes within the trad-wife phenomenon, and it's really great to be able to see an analysis of this that encompasses the food and body image aspect of the issue. Thank you.

[@cindyneff6499]

I wondered why this trend was missing me until you showed that racist meme. Yikes!!! Sounds like someone picked up on the dog whistles and ran with them. I agree with you, Abbey!

[@nysari_]

I've also getting culty alarm bells setting off since this movement took off. So much dangerous ideology starts out as posing itself as a solution to a problem, and pointing the finger at the "enemy". In this case, the problem is that young people in general aren't wanting to spend their lives working to support the ever-turning cogs of late-stage capitalism. But instead of pointing the finger at capitalism and corporate greed, the "enemy" is feminism for getting women into the workplace. And so for the low low price of your independence and autonomy, they can free you from a lifetime of work to... work by cooking, cleaning, having babies, and providing sex to a man who has full financial control over you. But don't worry, because surely sometimes in between all of that you'll get to make homemade sourdough while wearing pretty sundresses and go flouncing through fields of wheat barefoot during the golden hour. All you have to do is choose the right man, and hope to god that he doesn't go mask-off after you marry him and turn into a total monster who slowly separates you from your family, your money, and anything you could use to support yourself if you need to get out. This is why choice is so important. Tons of women are stay-at-home moms, and are wives to kind and supportive partners who see them as equals, and that's absolutely wonderful. There's nothing wrong with wanting what the trad-wives are selling. But there is a problem with romanticizing it so heavily that you gloss over all the less aesthetic parts and make it seem like it's the panacea to all society's ills, because it's not all sundresses and sourdoughs like they want you to believe.

[@thesupremediva]

It’s wonderful that we have options. However, far too many scream from their soap boxes when you choose something they don’t agree with. The idea of leaving work to - GASP - actually have quality time with my son has shocked and scandalized more people than if I’d said I wanted to become a stripper. The boss babe/hustle culture is Uber toxic and I’m over it. I’m not baking my kids goldfish from scratch but I’ll be damned I let someone shame me for wanting to cook meals for my family.

[@davyrantucci]

👏❤️

[@eaglenoimoto]

My brother and his wife (late 20s, central Europe) have gone down this road and it’s tearing both their families apart, especially since they both have a GLBT sibling that they cut off completely 😢 Both were raised by non religious, super open minded parents.

[@mrsballz]

The handmaid's tale just becomes more and more reality every day

[@AbbeysKitchen]

I hopeee we don't go that far

[@maloyo7901]

Yep, and it is even more scary that some people actually think this is a good idea.

[@moringsdaughter]

Hardly. Women choosing to stay home and make food from scratch is not removing anyones rights. Claiming that women staying home and filling traditional roles is anti-feminist as you are speaking against a woman's right to choose what is best for herself and her family.

[@misty4483]

@@moringsdaughterexactly. Believing men and women are equal plays right into traditional roles, as well as living any other way. Setting us back would be to judge how another woman and her family decide to live their life.

[@jennysuebernoudy8448]

I love Hannah, and she has said she does not make homemade stuff everyday. But I love her videos and have tried some of her recipes and loved them.

[@divadoc07]

There are a lot of things that bother me about trad wife creators, but one of them is how they use these affected, fake, meek, quiet little voices. Uuuuuggggghhhh, it's like nails on a chalkboard.

[@rn2787]

I make my own pastries because I am vegan and allergic to milk. The cup of sugar for 6-8 servings should indicate that it's not for health reasons.

[@sdennen]

I got into baking for the same reason - I'm allergic to cinnamon of all things and I just wanted apple pie! 😅 It grew into a love of baking from necessity.

[@rn2787]

@sdennen once you can't have a food it starts showing up in everything you love. Did you know BBQ Pringles have milk in them, I didn't until about 6 years ago. People wonder why we spend 2x longer in the store it's because we had to read 8 labels to buy some cookies.

[@lily-iv3rn]

Omg Abbey you are glowing today! This shade of green looks magnificent on you!

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Aww thank you!

[@elisaan725]

feminism just means men and women are equal and have equal rights.

[@CesarLopez-nz4po]

I appreciate the message of this video a lot. Do you have a video explaining the slippery slope of condemnation of "overly-processed" foods in more depth? Or one explaining why processed food doesn't directly mean unhealthy food? Because I think people get caught up on the definitions thinking that all processing is unhealthy. Grinding flour is a form of processing. Mining and purifying salt is a form of processing. Literally anything cooked, cleaned, washed, milled etc is technically processed. I think some people get confused which can be the scariest part because you think it would be common sense, but you really have to account for everything. It feels like the people who make anti-process content are intentionally misleading their audiences.

[@AbbeysKitchen]

Absolutely!!! i do need a video on processed foods bc yes, people get confused on these things. a lot of processed foods are very healthy

[@lilypink3614]

Hi Abby! I recently was binge watching some of your old videos & I remember watching one that you were trying on some new clothes you had just got. But I cannot find that video again! I've rewatched your old videos for hours & hours & find it! The clothes were simple & feminine but very cute! They were just my style too! I wanted to see what the website was that you ordered them from! Plz Plz point me in the direction of this video! I'd very much appreciate it!! Thanks in advance!

[@Cynergific]

Thanks!

[@Eattherainbow427]

I’ve watched A LOT of your videos and this one by far is my FAVORITE! I love to make my own foods, but I also am ok with some processed convenience foods. I’m plant based, but my family isn’t. My husband said he’d never want me to be submissive like this. I agree that it’s very culty.

[@elizabethshedd1017]

As someone who happily hadn't known anything about this trend, it's appalling how much casual racism is in some of this stuff.

[@mialovesyousm]

I think some women call themselves trad wives only because they are housewives. Many misundestand that there is a BIG difference between housewives and trad wives. And I think many women on tiktok that call themselves trad wives think being a housewife means being a trad wife. Because modern wives are more likely to go to work instead of being a fulltime housewife.

[@misty4483]

Telling other women they are “setting women back decades” for living their life as they choose, is setting us back.

[@anyaroz8619]

all these women need to see a good psychoanalyst! And like for years

[@mindybrown-haugen3115]

excellent!!

[@rezzy8590]

Just wanted to put this out there: I'm a enby Gen Z-er who came from a small rural town where "tradwives" were literally my grandmas. The oldest one is currently 80 and my mom born in the 1970s had me at 20, to give you some idea of how tight the generations are. Going back to this is a literal nightmare for me because I watched my family struggle with these roles and the many, many problems that come with them. We are a literal microcosm of the feminism waves. But none can dispute that my grandma at 80 is a stubborn, hardworking, hands-on lady. Never let anybody tell you that you have to be delicate to be a woman or mom. You can be as rough and tumble as they come. Side Note: I also have a cookbook from the 1950s that straight up bemoans how shit it was to hate cooking and be a SAHM. It's fucking hilarious and super fucking real. It's the "I Hate to Cook Cookbook" for anybody interested in snatching recipes from it!

[@frankiefavero1666]

I don't have an issue with any woman choosing to stay at home and assume a more traditional marriage, it is her choice. What I have a MAJOR issue with is SUBMISSION. Submission is "the action of accepting or yielding to a superior force or to the will or authority of another person" In essence, you're accepting that your husband is superior to you and/or your boss... Submission is not a benign word and in a household, it does mean that you are inferior to the patriarch... I read many people quoting the Bible on this comment thread, but remember than the Bible hasn't had any major updates since the 10th Century (BCE), you know, when women were their husband's property...

[@lanadellola]

100%

[@davyrantucci]

Because the Bible was inspired by God and God doesn’t modernize to keep up with us…lol. He knows what works and what doesn’t according to how He created us. To think the Bible needs to be updated is to think God makes mistakes…He doesn’t. More over submission is majorly misunderstood. It doesn’t mean oppression, it doesn’t mean lesser than. God tells us in the Bible that we are all equal. It means each taking our roles, and working within that framework. If you work, you submit to a boss. Is he better than you as a person? No way. But his position is higher than yours because he has certain responsibilities you don’t have…and sometimes that affects your job and sometimes it doesn’t but you can work together still. Many of us just choose to submit and give that respect to our Husbands instead of to a boss. If it’s not for you in your marriage that’s fine. It’s worked for me for over 20 years and that’s fine too.

[@layladarby1994]

​@@davyrantuccilove your reply so nicely done ❤️, glad you've had a great marriage.

[@tammaragardner9160]

Wow. I had never heard of this movement before watching this video. I very much enjoy doing the "wifey" things for my husband, like cooking a homemade meal or pressing his shirts... but I also enjoy having a professional career as an attorney, having my own money, discussing and participating in politics, and going out to eat at a restaurant sometimes. I think it's all about balance. Any behavior that goes to extremes is indicative of an underlying mental health issue.

[@alexandrasmith7682]

I have asked three times why one particular Trad Wife is making a financial living as a social media influencer when she is advocating staying home and looking after your husband. No reply. I am old enough to remember how restricted women's lives were. I wonder how many of these women will be happy to give up their bank accounts, car loans, mortgages (all of which, if you could get one, had to be guaranteed by a man). None of these modern women will have to spend two days a week doing the family laundry because the machines weren't there. They are a generation I actually feel sorry for because at least 50% of them will end up divorced and in a financial bind working shelf stacking jobs. Very good points with regard to be diet and health ....

[@davyrantucci]

Funny my Grandmother was born in 1929 and is still alive and tells me she feels women are more miserable now than they ever were. Probably just your point of view, and her point of view. If your independence is important to you in that way then don’t give it up. I’ve willingly given up a career for my family. But the ignorance of women to say that because we stay home we aren’t able to be educated on money, or will be divorced so we better be prepared…really? So women are smart enough to compete with men at work but not smart enough to be at home and trust their Husbands and understand money…?

[@BBLOuise]

I have a question. I get swollen after alcohol or preservatives. Have you heard of it?

[@Dory8]

Yay! Abbey. Women are also scapegoated for everything that goes wrong, although we are in control of very little.

[@vaneskak1579]

I feel very sorry for you. I’m a woman and I have never felt that in my 41 years. What country do you live in?

[@Dory8]

@@vaneskak1579 Because you haven't "felt that" (what exactly?) doesn't mean it isn't real. It occurs a part from what you feel, or I feel. I was speaking generally. I'm in Australia. When the state can take away your freedom (abortion rights in the US) whenever it likes, you're not in control. Women think they are because they belong to a class and have the skin colour that grants them privileges but that's an illusion. We are not occupying the seats of power. Men still own most of the wealth and still get to say what goes. Now, I don't mean by power, struggling Joe Bloggs down the street; I mean those who wield the power, and it's not a woman, let alone the majority of women. That's a reality, even if I can go about my life with ease because I'm middle class.

[@misty4483]

Women scapegoat as well, and scapegoat each other.

[@davyrantucci]

@@vaneskak1579 I’m with you on this. 40 years old and I don’t feel this supposed scapegoating due to being a woman.

[@davyrantucci]

@@Dory8 but how have you personally felt scapegoated for being a woman?

[@irsprst]

Hey Abbey, would you share with us where your top is from? :)

[@sc1592]

I can definitely see the appeal of letting someone else (husband) take on all the responsibility of making choices, especially when the state of the world is what it is. Tradwifery almost feels like a form of escapism. The problem lies in the fact that the second that man tires of you, you’re thrown out and have no financial skills or even credit history to get a home, no marketable skills to get a job, and probably no health insurance. Additionally, tradwifery is only available to people privileged enough to need only one income. If it’s a choice that works for you and your family, that’s great! But it shouldn’t be idolized, and we shouldn’t be shaming people who make other choices, either out of desire or out of necessity.

[@MythicalMeraxes]

You make some very valid and important points. But I’d like to add one more. What about talent and intelligence? I went to college because I had great grades and an aptitude for achievement. Was I supposed to put that aside and not use my Masters degree because my gender dictates that I should be homemaking? That seems like a waste. Women are just as talented as men and have just as much potential. Seems so sad to me to waste that.

[@davyrantucci]

So a woman is smart when she chooses to go to work and maintain a career but couldn’t be smart enough to marry a good man she can trust and certainly wouldn’t understand money enough to have health or life insurance or marketable skills or credit? Most of us did the career thing and boss babe thing and then gave it up to stay home and be a traditional wife and mother. I’ve never seen one trad wife tell anyone else they must follow this lifestyle too..but the amount of ignorance on us from the other side is astounding…escapism…yeah don’t think so.

[@sc1592]

@@davyrantucci not sure where you got smart or not smart from. My point is that should a husband and wife choose to divorce, someone who has been out of the workforce for an extended period of time is left at a clear disadvantage. See above examples. It’s important to consider that when choosing to leave a job, that’s all I’m saying.

[@davyrantucci]

@@sc1592 no you stated they wouldn’t have credit or health insurance etc…I don’t know anyone who doesn’t have those things, let’s give women more credit than that. When it comes to rejoining the workforce, some women choose to not go back to their old professions anyways, especially those in health care…shift work isn’t great when you are a single working mother. However being at home does allow you to find new passions, hobbies, side jobs or taking classes online etc. Sometimes she comes out of it with more diverse skills than before. Women also initiate divorce 78% of the time. So if she does, I’m sure she has all ready thought of many of these things. Luckily in my community, among all of us who are more traditional, in that we stay home and raise our families, divorce is quite low. However all these same principals apply to if she becomes a widow, and in that case, life insurance policies and living debt free, no mortgage etc is why we are more frugal than two income households generally speaking.

[@sc1592]

@@davyrantucci wow, how lucky you are not to know anyone without good credit and health insurance. I’m so glad you and your community feel safe and secure in your choices. I wish the same safety and security for everyone else.

[@alejandropetkof]

Can you respond to Unnatural Vegan's video about your protein powder? It's given me some concerns about your advice

[@alejandropetkof]

Unsubscribed - I don't even specifically care if the claims are true but an unwillingness to engage or take accountability is a level of hypocrisy I don't expect from your channel.

[@amymorketter2954]

raw milk ! thank you Abbey

[@dainasworldnumbers88]

I’m making that cereal!

[@skullcandy9641]

Can you review youtuber vegan dieticians justcallmeflora diet? And also Lidia mera

[@sophieirwin3497]

I can't imagine making poptarts from scratch. a) they would be a disaster and b) my boyfriend would be questioning my sanity when he's perfectly happy with shop bought ones and would like to spend time with me not cooking unnecessarily!

[@misty4483]

Yup, you do you. Im also wondering why it’s so triggering to ppl if some people see an idea, (like pop tarts) and love to make it themselves. Some husbands/boyfriends/partners would love to sample their wife’s creation and not feel left out.

[@cheese7119]

Abbie, can you please do a video on Colleen Christensen? I get her shorts recommended next to yours and although the advice is good... something seems off about her

[@user-nu5kq5dk2h]

Hi , can you please record a video about creatine❤